JoshC.

No creds or parks to report on in this blog post, but there'll be a few visitor attraction things. So yeah, still give it a read...
 
Monday morning came and, for whatever reason, no parks seem to open on Mondays in Poland during off peak (Legendia only opened Friday-Sunday, Energylandia closed on Mondays). So, in an unusual twist for my trips, we planned a full day of non-theme park stuff and culture.
 
The first stop of the day was Auschwitz, which was just over 30mins away from Legendia. We didn't go for a guided tour, instead opting to tour the area ourselves. I won't really go into any more details, as I don't think I need to explain just how harrowing of an experience that is. We spent a couple of hours there.
 
We then made the hour long drive into Krakow, where we were going to general touristy stuff, bit of sightseeing, eat at the Hard Rock etc. A bit of research the night before gave us some really interesting-attractions to visit:
Lost Souls Alley - a horror maze / escape room style experience
Krakow Pinball Museum - a 'museum' where, for a small fee, you can play over 40 different pinball machines and classic arcade games as much as you like
 
After a bit of wandering round, we found a third attraction of interest - Exit Room, an escape room.
 
Exit Room
https://www.exitroom.pl/
 
We stumbled upon Exit Room whilst trying to find Lost Souls Alley, and decided to book a room. They had 8 to choose from, and we opted to go for the Wolfenstein themed room. Not related to the video game series, bit sharing the same story. You are locked in a room, have an hour to escape, and the way to escape is to find the pieces of a gun to shoot an animatronic Hitler(!). It also started out quite nicely, as we were blindfolded at the start to disorientate us, and one of us was locked in a separate room to escape from as well. We didn't escape, and sadly there was no timer to give us the encouragement, but it was a very well presented escape room, and staff spoke excellent English!
 
Krakow Pinball Museum
http://www.krakowpinballmuseum.com/aboutus.html
 
This place is a real fun little gem! For about £8, you get unlimited access to lots of machines and arcade games (some classic, some new). It's a really chilled out, relaxed atmosphere, not busy, etc. Drinks were also cheap as well (everything in Poland is cheap, but in comparison to the rest of a city centre, the drinks were cheap too!). The best part was you were given a wristband, and could pop in and out throughout the day. We really got our money's worth!
 
It's a little bit geeky, maybe a guilty pleasure for some, but it's definitely something I'd recommend looking into if you're spending the day round there.
 
Lost Souls Alley
http://www.lostsoulsalley.com/index-en.php
 
I don't even know where to start with this. This is an experience which will probably stay with me for the rest of my life, and not in a good way. I didn't want to write a dedicated thing about it, but I think I'm going to have to. It requires so much explanation and set up to truly understand what this attraction is, and why it haunts me so much.
 
So yeah, suffice to say I didn't like this. Standby for more details; I'll link the thread when I've written it...
 
 
Krakow was a wonderful city to explore in general though. Lots of pretty buildings, the people were brilliant and the food was ace. The day we visited happened to be the anniversary of the Soviet Union invading Poland in the lead up to WWII (1939), which is also when the country's President and Prime Minister fled the country. There were memorial services throughout the day in various locations, which again were pretty hard hitting.
 
Another standout feature of Krakow, which sadly I didn't get a decent photo of, was a fire-breathing dragon statue by the river. Completely random, but very cool.
 
We left Krakow in the evening to go to our nearby hostel, which was very nice and simple. As I've said, it's a wonderful city, and it was nice and different to for me to spend a fully doing non-theme park stuff on a theme park trip...
 
Coming soon, Energylandia, with it's 10000000 creds, and other random stuff.

It feels like half of the European coaster community has decided to venture over to Poland this month, following the opening of that small coaster Hyperion, and with rapid expansion taking place at the two major Polish parks - Legendia and Energylandia. But how do they actually fair?
 
We flew to Katowice on a Saturday evening, arriving at our hotel late, giving us the perfect opportunity to arrive at Legendia Sunday morning. Legendia is based in Silesia, an old mining district of the country, and now in the process of truly being redeveloped into a tourism hot spot (indeed, around the area are plenty of mining headframes which have been turned into prettier sites!). With Legendia being bought by a new owner a couple of years back, it's clear the park aim to capitalise on this.
 
To our surprise, Legendia is very much a city park, literally just based off a main road through the city, and all the surroundings just being standard city stuff. Interestingly, the park operates a one-price ticket system, for 99 zloty (about £20). However, you're only allowed to leave for 15 minutes, and if you want to return after that, you need to buy a new ticket. Clearly a tactic to keep people in the park as long as possible, eat on park, etc. The park also has VERY good opening hours (minimum 10am-8pm, with park gates opening between 9 and 9.30), meaning people can pop in at various hours of the day.
 
The park opens with a little show, where kids are handed out free sweets and balloons and encouraged to take part, whilst adults are given free fudge!
 
The park has 4 coasters - two Zyklon Galaxis, a Soqeut looping coaster, and Lech, a new-gen multi-looping Vekoma. The Zyklons are bog standard, with some okay facades, and the Soqeut was closed due to it being rethemed for next year (plus the track looked in HORRID condition). So let's get down to Lech...
 
Lech Coaster
Lech is mental. The layout features a very steep drop (maybe even beyond vertical, I couldn't really tell), 3 inversions (one going through the station), plenty of airtime, twists, turns, and is partially over water. It flows so well, is incredibly smooth, the airtime is fantastic, and the vest restraints are surprisingly comfortable (and feel almost necessary with the amount of airtime you get!). And, finally, the first drop and inversion is intense. Extremely intense. I greyed out on every ride I did. We did 2 rides back-to-back, and that was a mistake as I felt quite wiped out afterwards. It's at a point where it's arguably too intense, as it put me off wanting to re-ride it too much. Nonetheless, it's still a fantastic ride, a truly brilliant investment (just over 4m euros) and something which has put Vekoma back in people's attentions, and rightly so.
 

 
Bazyliszek
The park's new for 2018 ride is a shooter dark ride. Themed around a house with lots of monsters, where a Basilisk has escaped. Trackless, and a combination of work from ETF, Alterface and Joravision, this is actually something very special. The queue is spectacularly themed. The ride features interactive sets and screens, which is transitions between very well. The shooting aspect isn't the only focus of the ride, with some story driven points too. It is genuinely astounding. There are a couple of minor issues though - it's never really explained that you have to hit targets multiple times before they are destroyed (I only realised this mid-way through my second ride!), and some of the real theming looks quite basic, and thus tacky and out-of-place compared to the other. 
 
Aside from that though, this is a true winner of an attraction, a real gem, and one of my favourite dark rides!
 

 
Dragon Riders
Dragon Riders is bloody mental. I have no idea who designed this ride, how many of these there are in the world, or any general clue really. But I imagine anyone who's thought "this is a good idea" has been on some hardcore drugs.
 

 
To try and explain the ride. You sit in your pod, with nothing more than a - rather loose! - lap bar to keep you in. You then start going round in a circle, like you would in a carousel. Your pod then starts to spin / roll continuously. Think of Slammer, but faster, in a smaller radius and for a lot longer. You do this for a while, then go in the other direction. And this lasts for about 3 minutes. Due to the loose lap bar, you bounce around in your seat, getting slammed every single way, and it's just general sickening. And unlike with many spinning rides, this doesn't have a 'warm up' period - it just seems to go straight to max speed!
 
I felt queasy for a good few hours afterwards. I'm not a huge fan of spinny rides, so I knew it would leave me feeling meh. But with something this insane, you have to try. You may regret it after, but you have to try it.
 
 
The rest of the park is pretty average to be honest. They have a log flume / boat ride thing which has terrible throughput, has staff specifically instruct you to brace yourself on the drops so you don't slam into row infront, and is generally a burden to ride, but has decent splashes. There's a few other funfair style rides, run incredibly well, but nothing that stands out.
 
We ate at one of the newer restaurants by Lech, and the food was decent and well priced (I believe I had a main meal, drink and dessert for about £7.50). And you do get wonderful views of Lech too. Speaking of food though, one thing which really stood out was how they didn't serve any snacks or bottled drinks at any of the shops - they were only at the food places. And the food places had very long queues from 1-5pm. The park, surprisingly, has lots of shops with lots of ride merch though!
 
Two things really stood out to me with Legendia. 
1) This park isn't a full day park. The park was, admittedly, very quiet when we visited, but even when busy, I can't see you needing more than a 10-6 day at the park. Given how the park's ticketing works, this is a bit disappointing, as it means you can't enjoy the park at it's opening and at it's closing (ie - night rides) without either buying two tickets, or having a very boring lull mid-way though the day.
 
2) Legendia has a future, and a very bright one at that. The park has a fantastic infrastructure and is clearly set up to hold a lot of people (Lech and Basilisk's queues were HUGE too). All the staff we interacted with spoke perfect English (and they even have flags with what languages they can speak on their name badges). They've got a fantastic entrance area. They know who it is they want visiting, and they know how to attract them. The thing that's missing at the moment is quality. Lech and Basilisk fill two very obvious holes, and have done so quickly and reasonably cheaply. A new water ride is coming in 2020 (hard to know what it could be based on the location, but a proper log flume or rapids would suit the park perfectly right now). And with the new ownership, they've clearly got the money to be able to bring in the new, high-quality additions.
 
So yeah, give this park 5 years, and I have no doubts they'll have a solid line up with some great filler attractions. In 10-12 years time, though, I really do see this having the potential to be one of Europe's most charming, most fun parks - a real gem in the making!
 
We left the park at 5-6ish in the end, after really dragging out the day. We spent some time exploring Katowice (and sadly, basically nothing was open because the Sunday we visited, EVERYTHING WAS CLOSED), and then got ready for a day of Polish culture...coming to a blog post near you soon...

(As if you havent had enough of Cedar Point already)
 
Blue Streak
So this woody has a problem in that there's a part of the ride that travels past the bins and it absolutely stinks. Other then that this is a surprisingly fast and brutal wooden coaster and it took us a little bit by surprise. It had two trains running and never had a queue. I like.
 
Corkscrew
This was pretty standard actually and apart from doing its thing over the pathway and has sentimental value, it's just another rollercoaster at the park and hasn't too much going for it these days.

Look at my photo skills.
 
Gemini
I don't really understand this ride. It didn't seem to be very reliable on my visit and for a ride that makes a point of it being a racing coaster, it must be the worst racing coaster out there. The thing doesn't are as the right hand side will always have the advantage. It's also a hybrid coaster but it was pretty unmemorable.
 
Magnum XL
This ride is brilliant. My only experience with Arrow hypers is The Big One which is in my opinion, an absolutely atrocious attraction. No air time, painful, shuddery and rides terribly. But Magnum, my god is absolutely fantastic. I can imagine riding this thing in 1989 and being blown away by just how much air time features throughout the ride. Oddly, the majority of the ride is outside the park and can barely be seen as you stroll around the midway. The ride is strangely themed to almost like a space ship (but obviously not) and features a huge drop and a journey towards the adventure park. But on the ride as you come back towards the station the ride throws air time hill after air time at you and it just feels insane. My first ride I was kind of in pain from just how much ejector you get. The second time I was fully aware and I adored it. So yeah I loved it, my fiancé loved it and I wished I'd ridden more. Alas, too much to do.
 
The next big ride is ages away in Old Town (or whatever its called) and too start off with...
 

WARNING, A LENGTHIER REVIEW
 
When it comes to Intamin, they are either brilliant (Taron, Juvelen, iSpeed) or monstrous (Cheetah Hunt, Tornado). With Maverick, back in its opening year and it had an inversion removed due to being too forceful, I had my reservations with how rideable this thing was going to be. Since opening its had some restraint modifications to make it more comfortable to ride and with its mini look but explosive layout, this ride has developed a somewhat cult following among enthusiasts. And I'm happy to say I am a fan.

The queue line is quite scenic for Cedar Point, going around a small lake and into a small shedded area before going into the station. I like how each train has a different colour and a different name. In the station, two trains are loaded at a time. We always chose the second train and I think it has a slight drawkback. When the trains are dispatched, the first will go straight into the launch lift hill but the second waits at the bottom. Problem is you have nothing to look at so you just sit (like in the picture) waiting for the ride to do something. But once it gets going this ride doesn't disappoint. From snappy inversions, huge air time hills with bucket loads of air time and a great little speed run through the lake with water blasters going off, this has something for everyone and is a real crowd pleaser. 

 
What I like about rides like Maverick, Icon, Taron, Juvelen is that the launch is only part of the experience, a faster lift hill if you will. You're not supposed to get off these rides beaming about how fast you accelerated but how the whole things come together. Maverick is a winner because it brings together everything that is good about Intamin. They don't always get it right but when they do, they really nail it. My only hope is that more open across Europe as they are such great, enjoyable rides.

 
And finally...
 

 
Ah RMC. Back in your earlier days whilst Theme Park Review were raving and singing your praises, I think a lot weren't too sure about the odd blocky track, the strange stall turns, the way the ride seems to throw riders around with all the grace of a bucking bronco. But over time, as more and more opened, whether completely new like Wildfire at Kolmarden or refurbishments of older rides, each has opened to massive praise. Steel Vengeance is without a doubt their biggest project. Not only did they change the universally hated Mean Streak but the created one of their longest and craziest rides. How does it really compare to other rollercoasters when to be honest there's very few like it. 

From the moment the train is dispatched, even before the lift hill there's air time which bodes well. What follows the lift hill is what feels like the most out of control experience felt on a rollercoaster. From the banked air time hills, the zero g rolls that felt like they come from nowhere in the layout, the way the train dives through the structure feels incredible. The zero-g stall, the small air time hills into the break run.

When it comes to B&M's and you ride, you can remember the layout quite easily, it's simple to describe the feelings through each hill or inversion. When it comes to Steel Vengeance, that feels impossible. Especially on the ride when you're flying past wooden beams or over the top of hills, trying to process the experience feels like a trivial exercise in over-analysing. It's just damn good.
 
My only complaint is the restraints, particularly around the legs aren't great. I don't know if its a height thing because it only seems to effect a few people. But its a minor complaint in what I think is one of the best rides built in the last ten years. Sure, I prefer Gatekeeper as I personally enjoy that ride more. But I don't underestimate the technical skills and know how that went into modifying, building and designing Steel Vengeance. 
 
Go and ride, simple as.
 
And so with all that, the Cedar Point experience was over. And was it worth it. Without a doubt yes. Maverick, Still Vengeance, Gatekeeper, Millennium Force and Raptor make the visit more then worthwhile. This is such a strong line up and it's only part of the offering. I know there is a load of people who like to pit CP against Magic Mountain and knowing I have been to two of the sought after US parks feels pretty awesome. I personally prefer CP but Magic Mountain is still a top theme park; I'd go there for Tatsu.


JOY!
 
The next stop is Canadas Wonderland so see you then. And thanks for reading.
 

Liseberg caught my attention in 2014 with the launch of Helix, and has since been very much on my agenda to visit.  With it being my first non-UK park, there were high expectations and I was extremely excited to visit.
 
Firstly, looking at the park itself, it’s absolutely beautiful.  The location in Gothenburg is amazing and I like the fact that many of the rides are built into the hillside, whilst also entwining between each other; it’s very Blackpool-on-a-hill ish.  Helix has a fantastic presence and I really like the way it entwines between Lisebergbanan, the log flume and various other rides.  In turn, Valkyria stands out and the view looking down from the top of the hill is fantastic.
 

 

 
Another thing that struck me was that the park must have a fantastic landscaping team; the gardens were all spotless, as were the buildings, queuelines and surrounding areas.  It really puts UK parks to shame in terms of presentation.
 
 
Unfortunately, I was disappointed with the operations at the park after hearing great things.  Helix runs three trains but has terribly slow dispatch times, it was stacked on all three trains every time I was on the ride and/or watching from elsewhere in the park.  I feel a lot of this is caused by the (unnecessary) seatbelts, as Icon at Blackpool doesn’t really have this problem.  In addition, operations on Valkyria were equally slow with the ride stacking all 3 cars on almost every occasion.
 
On a more positive note, Lisebergbanan is a fantastic queue shifter, as are the Flume Ride and Rapids.  Furthermore, the park was extremely busy on Saturday and Sunday, and I feel the park held together well with minimal breakdowns and generally a well organised feel, even if some of the throughputs were lower than I would have hoped for.
 
Finally, before looking at the rides, catering let the park down massively in my opinion.  The Max burger outlets all had queues out of their pens, meaning we ended up queueing 45 minutes for “fast food” – the other more upmarket options are pricey but the wait times are generally lower.
 
Onto the rides!
 
 
Valkyria
Approaching the ride, it has an intimidating presence with fantastic landscaping allowing you to get really close to the ride’s drop, and a forced-perspective of the ride station at the top of the steps.  The queueline is standard cattle pen for the most part, but there are some theming elements throughout and the theme music plays.
 

 
Inside the station, two faux fire plinths create a fantastic effect, as does a projection of a Valkyrie on the wall at the far end.  The music plays louder in here, and the atmosphere is very dramatic.
 

 

 
Onto the ride itself, the fast lift hill is followed by a wide turn with fantastic views of Gothenburg and the surrounding rides at Liseberg.  You’re slowed down before the holding break is used; I found it holds you for significantly longer than Oblivion, and the views over Liseberg are followed by a sudden plunge into a mist-filled tunnel.  The effect is very good here, as the angle you enter the tunnel mean it acts as a head-chopper; at night, the mist is lit in blue which adds further to the effect.
 
 
 
Following the drop, you enter an Immelmann before taking a fast-right-hand turn into a zero-g-roll.  I found the roll provided a strange sensation, as it’s taken much faster than most yet feels as if you “float” through it.  The turns which follow are fun, with a small moment of airtime offered depending where you are sat.  Following this, I found the final heartline roll to offer another floaty-sensation.
 

 

 
My verdict on Valkyria is that it’s a very fun and floaty coaster, but lacks high levels of G-Force.  Whilst I prefer Oblivion’s first drop due to the restraints, and longer tunnel, I feel that Valkyria is a much better attraction with it being a full-length coaster, and the theming is solid.
 
 
Helix
Helix was the main reason for my visit to Liseberg, and with a similar ride being introduced to the UK it was finally time to go and ride its main inspiration.
 
I find the ride’s presence around Liseberg absolutely stunning, it feels like it’s carved into the hillside and fits in perfectly around the park’s other attractions, whilst also maintaining a stature of its own.  At night, it looks phenomenal with the light only coming from the ride’s trains.
 
Entering the queueline, the ride’s soundtrack immediately becomes audible as you navigate (or queue!) through a high-tech feeling metallic queueline.  It reminded me of a classy version of G-Force’s queueline, but MUCH better.
 

 

 
The ride’s station is fairly standard, but the ceiling dispatch lighting adds a lot; especially once night falls.  The theme music plays loudly in here, but is sadly interrupted by the seatbelt announcement each time the train loads.
 
Dropping out of the station into the first inversion, some hangtime is experienced before turning into the first launch.  With a small burst of acceleration, you are thrown into a zero-g-roll, then a turn/airtime hill before entering the next two inversions.  I found the ride picked up some good force here, to then throw you into the airtime hill.  I didn’t experience much airtime here, however the sensation on the next zero-g-roll felt oddly jerky, as if the train is constantly catching up with itself; I think this is due to the track profile, but I actually really liked it!
 

 

 
The next section was my favourite of the ride, as you are thrown into a mini-airtime hill before entering a “helix” with extremely high g-forces experienced!  The turn that follows this was very weak by comparison, though the tunnel makes it more fun I guess.
 
Entering the second launch, you enter the ride’s tallest inversion.  I found this quite weak, and much prefer Icon’s Immelmann as you experience a lot of airtime coming down from it; whereas on Helix, you turn whilst inverted meaning there isn’t any.  After exiting this you are thrown into a huge airtime hill, which produces fantastic ejector on the back row.  Entering another high-g turn, you navigate some S-turns before entering the final heartline roll, which had some amazing hangtime.
 

 
Overall, I found that Helix is a very good, solid coaster with a decent length.  With that said, I don’t rate it as highly as many others do.
 
 
Balder
Balder was much anticipated by myself, being a fan of wooden coasters.  The ride’s queueline is a horrible mess of mesh and cattle pen but putting that aside, it’s a really awesome ride.
 

 
I was surprised with how steep (and fast!) the lift hill is, and much like the other rides at Liseberg, fantastic views are offered.  The first drop is fantastic and provides some fantastic airtime, a trend that continues throughout the ride.
 

 
The bulk of the ride’s layout is made up of airtime hills taken very quickly, meaning that there’s insane ejector in almost every hill.  A particular highlight for me was the hill taken fully in a tunnel, as it feels like you’re being thrown up towards the ceiling.  In addition, there are a huge number of VERY close head choppers throughout the layout, which combined with being thrown out of your seat at the same time genuinely made me feel uneasy!
 

 

 
Overall, Balder is a fantastic wooden coaster.  It’s much smoother than other woodies I’ve ridden, but the airtime is sublime.  The ride experience improves massively at night, with the tunnel providing a moment of pitch-darkness.
 
With that said, I did find it very formulaic and the layout feels methodical as opposed to out-of-control, making it an entirely different experience to rides like Megafobia.  It’s great fun, but I couldn’t help feeling on the last few hills, “it’d be great if the ride did something different now.”
 
 
Lisebergbanan is a fantastic coaster which makes use of the terrain, much like Helix.  A lengthy ride is experienced, with plenty of force on the corners.  I also loved the three turns taking you down the hillside through the tunnel, though the brake run is brutal!  The ride station is one of the best I’ve ever seen, as is the ride’s capacity.
 
 
 

 
Atmosfear is a brilliant drop tower, whilst not as forceful as some the views are impressive and the height fantastic, and I liked the fact that the drop feels much longer than similar drop towers.
 

 
Loki is an incredible flat ride, and may be my new favourite (was previously Slammer at Thorpe).  The ride’s restraints mean that incredible airtime is offered, as well as a huge amount of force on the way down.  Close interactions with Balder also improve this.
 

 

 
The biggest surprise of the visit for me was Mechanica.  I absolutely adored Bling at Blackpool, like I remembered it being amazing.  But Mechanica was (to put it as politely as possible), utter rubbish.  We had two rides on it and only experienced one good moment, the rest was awkward shuffling from side to side and aimlessly swinging.  The noise it makes is amazing though.
 
Flume ride is amazing, my absolute favourite log flume.  It’s taken at a very fast speed, and the hillside location makes for stunning interactions with the coasters.  I found the last two drops to be a lot of fun, with just the right level of wetness to be fun but not stupidly wet.  Similarly, the rapids were also brilliant fun, and it was nice to see that they still use all their water features unlike UK ones.
 

 
Overall, I found Liseberg to be a really nice amusement park.  It’s clear that they prioritise quality in everything they do, with the rides all being comfortable, well presented and fun.  A very easy abroad park to do for the first one, too.  A few more photos below
 

 

 

 

 

 

A cryptic wheel cover and demolition of a bridge, followed by markings on the ground.  A pIt of concrete footers.  Then a coaster.  Even after watching the project for well over two years, it feels surreal standing next to the twisted metal track of Icon and seeing the trains swish around what was previously a lake.
 
Visible from many locations within the park, Icon makes its presence known simply by being there.  It may not be tall, but in terms of land covered it’s HUGE.  First impressions heading up the ramp seeing the Immelman looming up ahead are impressive, but the approach from the ride entrance side is the money shot.  It’s such an impressive sight with the huge entrance structure, glorious soundtrack playing and the smart gold trains whizzing around you and other rides at the park.
 

 
The queue line is fantastically landscaped with amazing vantage points to watch the ride, and whilst relatively short manages to catch various sections of the ride’s amazing soundtrack.  It really is sublime standing there, hearing the launch audio, and seeing a train full of excited riders slowly exit the station before the train is hurled through swirling mist and into the tunnel.
 

Yes, they have finished the fence now!
 
Decorated in style, the ride features various elements of theming such as a garden with named posts of those involved in the project, a small water feature, mist effects and a nice entrance area/viewing platform.  Given that Pleasure Beach is an amusement park at heart, I have to give them credit for putting so much effort into the overall experience of Icon, it has really paid off and creates a unique atmosphere around the ride.
 

 
Entering the station, the soundtrack hits you like a ton of bricks and does a great job of building the hype - alongside the class decoration, lighting and mirrors, it’s one of the best atmospheres I’ve ever felt inside a coaster station.
 
But… is it any good to ride?
 
 
The excitement builds as you dispatch from the station, with the launch audio gradually getting louder before launching you towards the mist-filled tunnel with “IIIIIIIIIICON” ringing in your ears.
 

 
Flying through the misty tunnel, an almost dream-like moment of obscured vision is followed by entering the top hat element completely disorientated, before cresting the hill and being treated to one of the best airtime moments I have ever known on a coaster.  On the back, you crest the hill slowly before being thrown out of your seat on the way down, whilst there is some ejector as you crest on the front.
 

 
Diving through the garden for the first time, you enter the inclined loop before swerving to the left, right, then diving underneath Steeplechase and Big Dipper.  Whilst I didn’t feel the near-misses on-ride as much as I expected, it’s an engineering masterpiece to fit the track there and the S-turns provide some fun forces before you are taken back over Steeplechase into what I found to be one of the best elements of the ride.
 
The heart-line roll offers a completely different sensation to the beginning of the ride, creating a stark contrast.  From fast-paced ground hugging turns, you are taken into some ridiculously comfortable hang-time – the amazing Mack restraints are really used to their potential here, allowing you to hang freely (but comfortably) for a second before “catching” you and throwing you into two small and sudden moments of airtime.  Leading you back through the tunnel of mist, I found the two small airtime hills followed by the second launch to be a highlight of the ride.
 

 
With the station and surroundings a blur as you fly past them, you enter the Immelman.  It’s quite something seeing The Big One essentially turn-over, and the element is a lot of fun at the front – at the back, it’s quite simply one of the most insane moments on any coaster.  You’re taken from ascending what feels like the start of a loop to hang-time, then ridiculous “sideways-airtime” as you come down the drop, before being thrown into a steeply banked Stengel dive and then into the turn.  This is one of the perfectly executed moments of Icon.
 

 
Coming out of the over-bank and into the airtime hill, you are thrown yet again out of your seat before twisting onto your side into a tight helix.  I found the force to be decent here, with a good view of the theming if you’re sat on the left-hand side of the train.  Forcing you out of your seat yet again, you twist over to the right to take a majestic dive over the ride’s entrance area before entering yet another unique element.
 

 
Wonky-airtime.  Yep, Icon has it.  You’re taken into an off-banked airtime hill, giving the impression that you’re going to be thrown into the totem poles (a fantastic throwback to the park’s past for those who remember, btw!) before meandering into the high-five element and slithering back into the brake run.  The high-five element felt quite weak to me; it’s very clever and a true engineering feat, but it didn’t have the impact or sensation I thought it would as a ride experience… although with the Icon exit music becoming audible as the train hits the brake run, I soon forgot about that!
 

 
After my initial rides on Icon I was unsure but having let the coaster properly warm up, it has become a firm favourite.  To me, it’s the definition of a perfect coaster; it’s long, has a number of unique elements, isn’t inversion focused (yet still has two perfectly placed and impactful inversions in the layout) and the airtime is second-to-none.  Every element serves a purpose, and the ride is taken so comfortably yet isn’t afraid to throw you around.  The decoration is excellent, and the soundtrack is pure bliss; easily some of the best audio I have ever heard at a theme park, The Notable Stranger has done an excellent job.
 
My concerns going forward are the maintenance of audio systems, and effects; the train lighting and mist has already proved unreliable, and the ride has only just been open a week.  Pleasure Beach are historically not the best with keeping audio systems in check, but I hope Icon changes this trend. 
 
Thanks for reading, a few more photos below
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
Icon is incredible, and offers something that the UK has been missing for some time.  Pure quality. 

Wicker Man.  I think it’s fair to say that I had very mixed feelings during the construction and build-up process for this ride.  Whilst I was happy to see a new wooden coaster finally grace the UK line-up, I had reservations about how good it would be; there weren’t any huge drops in the layout, so would it pick up enough speed to be thrilling?
 
On approaching the ride, the excitement builds from the moment you see the hugely impressive Wicker Man structure and entrance signage come into view with the music droning in the background.  I couldn’t quite believe what I was seeing – it’s such a compelling sight, nothing looks out of place and everything just ‘works’.
 

 

 
Moving into the queue-line, the design is fantastic with so many vantage points for the ride – small items of theming are expertly placed creating brilliant photo opportunities.  Throughout queuing there are many good places to watch the coaster from, and it’s so pleasing to see that everyone seems to be enjoying it.  I really like how the smoke effect is pulled around the corner by the train after exiting the second tunnel, in particular.  Being surrounded by the roar of a wooden coaster combined with the soundtrack, theming and screams of joy is really something quite special.
 

 

 
Onto the preshow, I enjoyed this and found it delivers a lot in a short space of time.  The transition is clever and the show lasts just long enough to stay interesting whilst not becoming a burden after a few rides.  I found the theatrics and changes in atmosphere particularly impressive, however it was a shame on one of the rides I had that the automatic doors at the back of the room kept opening.  Exiting into the station, the lighting and dispatch/unload audio keeps the theme consistent and is very impressive.
 
With the thematic elements done to a very high standard, how well would the coaster itself hold up?  After five rides on two separate occasions, I absolutely love it.
 
Dispatching out of the station, the pre-lift section is very Nemesis Inferno-esque (with the mist-filled tunnel) and sets the scene for the ride very well.  Ascending the lift hill, the views of the ride are excellent and the audio helps to build anticipation throughout.
 

 
The first corner and drop help to build up the speed, and the tunnel adds a level of disorientation, as you exit already facing the ground.  The section that follows is truly sublime; after going over the second hill in the tunnel, you emerge blinded from the light to be thrown (yes, THROWN) first to the right, then to the left and into a ground-hugging turn.  This is my absolute favourite section of the ride; the forces are much better than I expected and the transition from right-to-left is just so much fun.
 

 

 
Diving through the Wicker Man structure and up into the turnaround, this offers a nice view of the queue-line and theming structure before hitting the two small bumps (which are much better than they look!) and then plunging to the right through the structure into yet another fantastic and unexpected sideways-banked drop.
 

 
I found that the flat corner goes a long way to making the ride feel longer, as it gives you time to process the elements you’ve been through before heading into the next section.  The straight drop which follows provides a nice feeling of weightlessness, however on the back row at the end of a rainy day there was some incredible airtime there!  Following this is a sharp right-hand-turn through the structure, before turning left under the lift-hill and into the brake run leaving the clank of the lift chain ringing in your ears.
 

 
After some time to think it through, I can say in full confidence that Wicker Man is genuinely one of the best roller coasters I have ever ridden.  Firstly, it’s the first time Alton have delivered a fully complete theme under Merlin, with no obvious corners cut and nothing looks out of place.  I could nit-pick, but it's the best we've had in the UK for years - so I won't.  The coaster itself is great fun and is a superb example of a wooden coaster.
 
Combined, it’s a masterpiece.
 
My only concerns going forward are the reliability issues the ride is currently having, and maintenance of effects.  The fire, smoke and audio add a lot to the overall experience, and with the fire already broken, I only hope that Alton can manage to maintain them to a high standard.
 
Thanks for reading, a few more photos below.
 

 

 

 

 

 

 
Wicker Man = AMAZING. 

So, I figured I may as well give a bit more insight about my views on The Walking Dead - The Ride.
 
I know plenty of people have pretty much written it off already, and it's almost trendy to hate the idea, but I do think it's worth going into this with an open mind.  The overall experience is good, well themed, and does justice to what the ride and building was designed to achieve.  
 
The entrance portal is nice.  It is standard run down Thorpe style, but it is still good.  The queue is, again, standard Thorpe in that it's "how much queue can we fit in one space", with just little nuggets of theming - in the way of themed signage and Easter Eggs to the show - to go with it.  There's no extensions or anything, so on quiet days, you will have to walk through the whole thing, which is a pain..  Audio in the area is nice and creepy, and the watchtower looks alright to be fair.
 
Bag room is now outside the building, and is clearly unfinished at the moment.  Hopefully it can be themed up, especially to the standard of the inside of the ride.  After that, groups of 20 (so 2 trains worth) get batched into pre-show.  The pre-show is extremely basic - a minute long video featuring a character talking to you, encouraging you to make your way through the building because we're under attack.  It's well done, and I don't think it will get tedious during re-riding, but I feel like they could have done more here.  Some big special effect, to give you the personal reason to get moving, rather than some guy on a screen telling you...
 
The walkway to the station is exceptionally well themed.  You go through different areas of 'the safe zone', and as you go through them, audio is triggered saying how those zones are under attack, encouraging you to keep moving.  The tone is perfect here, and really sets up the experience well. 
 
The ride itself is themed to a 'transit system' in the safe zone, and is being used to transport you to safety.  It's clever, and gives you a reason to be on the ride.  From there, it is just X, with special effects, and I don't think that can be stressed enough.  I really hope that people have ended up being ignorant the OTT "it's the scariest thing ever" marketing approach, or are able to just look past it, else it sets the ride up to fail.  In saying that, the special effects that are there are good, and really do enhance the ride experience.  There aren't any animatronics, just zombie mannequins (which aren't the greatest, but to a casual rider will more than do the job).  There's also screens, smoke, audio and lighting effects, all of which are used very well.  The one stop during the ride is a real highlight actually, fitting in with the story perfectly, and just being a lot of fun!
 
The ride ends with us still being under attack; everywhere in the safe zone is overrun with zombies.  The post-ride experience happens, in the form of a loud noise, and is...just a bit naff?  There's terrible noise bleed from there to the waiting bit before the station, so if you've been unfortunate with timings, it does spoil it somewhat.  There is more to it, but I believe that tweaks were still being made, so I don't know what to say / expect from that for now.  There is a lot of potential there, but it needs a bit more direction.
 
So yeah, to round it all up...
+Fantastically themed experience
+A fun ride experience, with good special effects
+An experience that stays true to what the original X:\No Way Out aimed to do
+A cohesive story which is easy to understand
-Pre-show could do with a bit more oompf
-Post-show needs a bit of clarity / more direction
 
 
But before I go - One final thought.  
 
I like this, I won't deny that.  I also liked X.  I haven't decided whether I like this more than X or not, but that's neither here nor there for now.  Personally, I think X is the better thing for Thorpe now; it had potential to be a fun ride which was accessible to all.  
 
I can't help but wonder what Thorpe could have done with X if they had the budget this had.  Or even half the budget.  They really could have created an attraction where you rode "on a wave of light (and sound)", went through tunnels of light, etc.  I imagine that having the trains 'chase' lit up track, with lasers and smoke effects around, along with an extended original soundtrack would have been more than possible, along with some fun lighting effects in the entrance and exit walkways.  I reckon I'd have loved that, as would a large majority of people.

So, I figured I may as well give a bit more insight about my views on The Walking Dead - The Ride.
 
I know plenty of people have pretty much written it off already, and it's almost trendy to hate the idea, but I do think it's worth going into this with an open mind.  The overall experience is good, well themed, and does justice to what the ride and building was designed to achieve.  
 
The entrance portal is nice.  It is standard run down Thorpe style, but it is still good.  The queue is, again, standard Thorpe in that it's "how much queue can we fit in one space", with just little nuggets of theming - in the way of themed signage and Easter Eggs to the show - to go with it.  There's no extensions or anything, so on quiet days, you will have to walk through the whole thing, which is a pain..  Audio in the area is nice and creepy, and the watchtower looks alright to be fair.
 
Bag room is now outside the building, and is clearly unfinished at the moment.  Hopefully it can be themed up, especially to the standard of the inside of the ride.  After that, groups of 20 (so 2 trains worth) get batched into pre-show.  The pre-show is extremely basic - a minute long video featuring a character talking to you, encouraging you to make your way through the building because we're under attack.  It's well done, and I don't think it will get tedious during re-riding, but I feel like they could have done more here.  Some big special effect, to give you the personal reason to get moving, rather than some guy on a screen telling you...
 
The walkway to the station is exceptionally well themed.  You go through different areas of 'the safe zone', and as you go through them, audio is triggered saying how those zones are under attack, encouraging you to keep moving.  The tone is perfect here, and really sets up the experience well. 
 
The ride itself is themed to a 'transit system' in the safe zone, and is being used to transport you to safety.  It's clever, and gives you a reason to be on the ride.  From there, it is just X, with special effects, and I don't think that can be stressed enough.  I really hope that people have ended up being ignorant the OTT "it's the scariest thing ever" marketing approach, or are able to just look past it, else it sets the ride up to fail.  In saying that, the special effects that are there are good, and really do enhance the ride experience.  There aren't any animatronics, just zombie mannequins (which aren't the greatest, but to a casual rider will more than do the job).  There's also screens, smoke, audio and lighting effects, all of which are used very well.  The one stop during the ride is a real highlight actually, fitting in with the story perfectly, and just being a lot of fun!
 
The ride ends with us still being under attack; everywhere in the safe zone is overrun with zombies.  The post-ride experience happens, in the form of a loud noise, and is...just a bit naff?  There's terrible noise bleed from there to the waiting bit before the station, so if you've been unfortunate with timings, it does spoil it somewhat.  There is more to it, but I believe that tweaks were still being made, so I don't know what to say / expect from that for now.  There is a lot of potential there, but it needs a bit more direction.
 
So yeah, to round it all up...
+Fantastically themed experience
+A fun ride experience, with good special effects
+An experience that stays true to what the original X:\No Way Out aimed to do
+A cohesive story which is easy to understand
-Pre-show could do with a bit more oompf
-Post-show needs a bit of clarity / more direction
 
 
But before I go - One final thought.  
 
I like this, I won't deny that.  I also liked X.  I haven't decided whether I like this more than X or not, but that's neither here nor there for now.  Personally, I think X is the better thing for Thorpe now; it had potential to be a fun ride which was accessible to all.  
 
I can't help but wonder what Thorpe could have done with X if they had the budget this had.  Or even half the budget.  They really could have created an attraction where you rode "on a wave of light (and sound)", went through tunnels of light, etc.  I imagine that having the trains 'chase' lit up track, with lasers and smoke effects around, along with an extended original soundtrack would have been more than possible, along with some fun lighting effects in the entrance and exit walkways.  I reckon I'd have loved that, as would a large majority of people.

The Worst GCI in modern history. Wicker Man will be **** we all know it. Doesn't look very interesting, not very fast at all.
 
Just three ways Wicker Man has been described over the closed season on this forum. There's a wealth of material, of people lining up to give the first modern woodie in the UK in 22 years a good kicking. The point where coaster enthusiasts have already ruled themselves judge, jury and executioner on a ride way before anyone had even had the chance to ride. Here we are a good two weeks later from the preview event and I think there's proverbial egg on peoples faces. I remained quietly optimistic, keeping expectations in check. What I expected was a well paced, fun, mildly thrilling family wooden ride and that's exactly what I got. I knew this wasn't going to be Wodan, it wouldn't be the airtime machine that Megafobia or Tonnerre De Zeus are. But what I did get was the best rollercoaster Merlin have ever built..
 

 
Now before you decry my last sentence as hyperbolic nonsense, understand something. I love a thrilling rollercoaster but what I really love is an inventive, interactive, original layout. I love getting on a ride, hearing the people around me screaming, loving every moment, hitting the break run and then shouts of amazement, the joy that emanates from the riders. Hit the break run on Nemesis, Inferno, Swarm, Oblivion and you hear nothing, just complete silence. It's just another steel rollercoaster going through the motions. But for the first time in a long while I heard something from a UK ride. People love the Wicker Man. They can't believe that such an old looking ride (bare with me) can deliver thrills, excitement on such a scale. Europeans and Americans are used to the thrill of a wooden rollercoaster but the UK has forgotten that wooden rollercoasters are more then a match to their steel counterparts. For me, this is the first time that Merlin have hit the nail on the head and got it right. 
 
So why is it so good?

 
To start off with, I like how little of it you can see from around the resort. There was a lot of discussion around Alton's limitations and how they get around them and Wicker Man is another example of that. The way the ride seems to work on several different levels to gather pace and momentum is right out of the Nemesis/Smiler handbook, the way the ride descends to the bottom of the Flume lake, or the oddity of the lift hill, the way the ride dips through the Wicker Man structure three times, each time getting more and more intense or the way the compact layout eeks out the ride length perfectly. The queue line which features very few switchbacks and naturally uses the terrain to get you close to the structure or the balcony which overlooks the majority of the ride giving great photo opportunities.  The mercifully brief pre-show which I thought was perfect for the ride, telling us the story without getting bogged down in details. At its core, this is a very simple story on a pretty basic woodie but the ride is more then the sum of its parts. The soundtrack which I really like slowly builds up in drama the further into the queue you go. This feels like the kind of ride that you couldn't get anywhere else, tapping into legend in the same way that Hex does. This is right out of the Towers rule book and is all the more stronger for it.

 
At the moment the rides biggest issues are operational. The park hasn't really got to grips with how to run it yet with very slow dispatches and numerous breakdowns. It only ran for two hours on my visit (didn't help that Nemesis was down all day, curse you Towers) and when Wicker Man was running trains didn't seem to go out very quickly. I don't think the way rows are labelled is very clear in the station either, the darkness and moodiness of the station means people can't see the numbers hanging above their heads and numerous times people were just wondering back and forth lost. If you've ever ridden a GCI woodie you know what to expect here from the Millennium flyer trains. They are comfortable enough to ride in whilst durable enough to take it when you go slamming from side to side on the rides cornering. I won't cover the ride in too much detail as frankly it differs massively from front to back but what I will say is that when this thing beds in, those back row seats are going to be absolutely fantastic. Our first ride was row 5 and then onto row 8 and the difference was staggering. 

 
I have two main worries. The first is the effects. Lets face it, Merlin are hit and miss with this and as you can see from the Smiler most of it no longer works. No sprayers, no screens, no car wash. The effects on Wicker Man tell a story far more then the Smiler and the danger of the Wicker Man structure having no fire or smoke must be pretty high; I'd be surprised if they still work by June. That's ignoring all the smoke effects before the lift hill, on the first drop tunnel, in the break run. If Towers want this ride to continue to have the positive reaction it currently has, it is essential they stay on top of this. That being said, I think the strong layout helps but on an effects driven ride, that can only do so much. My second concern is the rides longevity. Wooden coasters aren't steel coasters, they need consistent maintenance to keep them from getting too rough, too shaky, too unbearable. I question whether Merlin can give this ride the love it needs five years, ten years down the line. Based on their track record with Colossos for example, they let that go SBNO for two years. I don't want to see that happen with Wicker Man, in my view it's the closest to perfection Merlin can ever get.

 
So its safe to say, I'm a big fan of the Wicker Man and I call it a triumph for the UK industry. When people were lining up to rip it to shreds, I stayed positive and optimistic and whilst I don't want to say I told you so, I told you so. My biggest hope that comes out of this wooden ride though is that parks like Paultons, Drayton, Flamingoland, hell even Thorpe and Chessington look at what can be done with a ride like this and build their own. The wooden ride genre is big in America, China, all across Europe and yet here, they are seen as dangerous and unsafe. Telling people I work with that I was going to Towers to ride a wooden rollercoaster, they thought it was a disaster waiting to happen. I can only hope that the Wicker Mans success leads to more and more and who knows what that could lead to.
 

 
Thans for reading and as for a score, Wicker Man is a solid 8/10. I can't wait to get back up there. 
 
Next time I'll be Enthusiastic Icon. 

Something Stupid: Thorpe Half Marathon 2018
 
How far would you go, as an enthusiast, to build your collection of Theme Park tat?
 
...
 
Take out a Wonga loan to cover the cost?
Break up with your long term partner so you can free up some space?
How about run a half marathon to earn it...?
 
Well, last Sunday saw me do Something Stupid as I found myself running the 21 kilometres of the 2018 Thorpe Half Marathon, all in an attempt to nab the jazzy coaster-themed medal bestowed upon those who manage to get over the finish line.
 
And here for you, dear reader, is how I got on...
 

 
Thorpe Half Marathon 2018
 
The Thorpe Half is now in its second year, having enjoyed a successful - if wet - debut in 2017. Unfortunately as it's held in February, the park is closed, so the only real connection to Thorpe Park is that it starts and ends in the car park; there's no sprinting past Stealth and dashing around Depth Charge. What it does have to offer however is a pleasant run through the Surrey countryside, along a relatively flat-profile road-closed course - perfect for those chasing a personal best.
 
I was, it must be said, not chasing a personal best. I was just in it for the medal.
 

 
So, first things first. Sunday 25th February 2018 was cold. Bloody cold. The event organisers recommended that participants arrived at the car park by 07:45am, to allow good time before the race started at 09:00am. At 07:45am on Sunday 25th February in the Thorpe Park car park, the mercury was touching -1 degrees C.
 
But this hadn't deterred anyone! Indeed, the car park was busier than the average in-season Saturday when I arrived, and the place was buzzing with excited, committed runners. Many of whom seemed happy to be out in nothing more than vests, lycra, and shorts. In -1 degrees.
 
At this point I must admit that I took a large gulp and wondered what on earth I was doing here - and this wouldn't be the last time this particular thought crossed my mind.
 

 
It's also worth saying that I wasn't prepared for doing this. At all.
 
The fault is squarely mine, but I had done such minimal training beforehand that it doesn't even really merit the name "training". Since I booked a place at the event back in November, I had managed a grand total of two 3 mile runs on the roads around my house. Two. And on one of those I very nearly threw up at the end of it.
 
I am not a runner. I don't especially enjoy it, so, at best this was going to be a struggle. But there was only one way to get that medal...!
 
At this point I decided I'd take my mind off the impending challenge by having a nose around the site.
 
First up was a mosey on over to the park entrance - which looked very bare without an actual sign there! Does this happen every season, or might we be about to get a new sign design? And whilst they're at it, the paintwork could do with a good looking over too...
 

 
Alas I was allowed to go no further, because this sign had both red writing and underlining - doubly authoritative.
 

 
Thanks to my trusty zoom lens though, I could peek in a little closer...
 
...but there wasn't really much to see.
 

 
The Annual Pass building seemed to be getting a good dose of TLC though. Looked like it was having a new roof fitted, given the scaffolding.
 

 
Given the red underlined signs everywhere, it was pretty clear that the toilets by the entrance were out of bounds and out of action.
 
So bring on the portaloos!
 
Unfortunately, you can never have enough portaloos, and in this case, there weren't enough portaloos. Queueing is par for the course at any Theme Park, but queueing in sub zero temperatures is even less fun.
 

 
A quick look over the back of the bogs revealed very little of interest - although Zodiac standing stationary in a half-upright position looked quite strange! There was no visible work being done to X / WDTR.
 
However, it is photos such as this one that make me think how lucky we are to have a park as pretty as Thorpe in our country.
 
Thorpe Park is rarely praised for looking good. But with bright blue skies and deep blue lakes top-and-tailing it, it can't be denied that this is a sweet view. Reminded me strangely of a (very) mini Cedar Point...
 

 
OK - back to the action. The event organisers had done a great job with the central runners' village area, which contained a Cookie Bar, Coffee Stall, Massage Beds, Medal Engraving, a bunch of running-related retailers...
 

 
...and a stage!
 
Pictured here are the Epsom Rock Choir, who were singing with gusto despite the bitter cold. Did I mention that it was cold?
 

 
08:45am. Nearly game time. I got changed into my kit, which naturally featured a vintage Thorpe t shirt, and made my way over to the start area.
 

 
There were nearly 2,000 runners taking part in today's race, including many that had been bussed in by their local running group for the event.
 
The "why am I here?" thought flickered across my mind once more.
 

 
And we were off!
 
The route took us past the annual pass building, down towards the car park entrance, and off to the left.
 

 
Geek Photo #1 - the Protecting The Magic sign.
 
Do you know the Six Spells for Safety?
 

 
The route continued to track along the Staines Road, through the backstage areas of the park. Lots of industrial-looking buildings and infrastructure.
 

 
And then, behold! Geek Photo #2 - I spy nostalgia!
 
These look to me as if they've been saved from Chief Ranger's Carousel (RIP), which is great. But what will the park do with them?! Hopefully not leave them to rot...
 

 
OK, back to the race. The course had kicked us out of the Thorpe Park grounds at around 1 mile, on to Norlands Lane, then Coldharbour Lane, past Thorpe Farm (RIP), and up to the Thorpe Bypass.
 
At this point, my lack of fitness was really kicking in. The Sunday morning jolly at the Theme Park had suddenly turned very real, and I was wheezing after just 2 miles.
 
What didn't help was this section of the course, which involved running half a mile up one half of the road, only to turn around and run straight back down the other half. Sigh.
 

 
On the plus side, some great views of the M25. Oof.
 

 
But to be fair, much of the route was through very pleasant countryside, and if I'd been more fit it might have even been enjoyable.
 
As it was, it was a real mental effort to keep my head down, and keep moving. Just keep going. One step in front of the other. The coldness issue dropped away after 4 miles, because my body was generating so much heat.
 
I was overtaken plenty of times, and I had to just walk up anything resembling an incline. Spotify was a massive help.
 
The breakthrough for me came at about mile 10, where I realised that I'd made it around 75% of the course and that finishing was achievable!
 

 
At mile 12, I could start to see the tops of some of the rides peek over the skyline - wow. Never have I been more motivated by seeing the crest of Tidal Wave's lift hill!
 
My legs were properly turning to jelly, and the last pushes were really stop / start. But with a view like this, and the end in sight, I forced myself to go for a sprint finish for the last few hundred yards.
 

 
I threw myself over the finish line and doubled over, my chest burning and my legs on fire.
 
I'd done it!
 
2 hours, 1 minute, and 17 seconds of running later, and I'd completed the Thorpe Half.
 

 
And what was all this endeavour for?
 
Another addition to my collection of Theme Park tat! But what an addition it is.
 
Genuine blood, sweat and tears went into getting it, so I suspect it will remain amongst the more treasured of all the tat in my possession. It's a good looking, weighty medal and I'm proud to have earned it!
 

 
So, will I be running the Thorpe Half again next year to add another medal to my collection?
 
Absolutely not!
 
Immediately after the race my legs seized up to such an extent that I almost couldn't drive home. In the days following the event, my muscles were so sore that walking - anywhere - was a very real problem. And I later found I'd sprained my left foot along the course, and one of the toenails on my right foot had filled with blood and fallen off. Yuck. And did I mention the nipple chafing?
 
These injuries are, of course, preventable. As I said at the top of the piece, my running the Thorpe Half was Stupid. I certainly don't recommend following my lead and just running a Half Marathon in freezing temperatures with no prior training whatsoever in order to obtain a coaster-themed medal.
 
However, for those in better shape (or with a greater commitment to training) than I... it was a very well organised event. Why not give next year's a go?
 
~
 
Thanks for reading! Comments very welcome below.

So I visited Liseberg back in July, and I just wanted to share a few thoughts on the park...  Majority of my photos were like so bad so I'm just stealing photos from the park's website to break things up.
 
Ultimately, I was left a bit...unfulfilled? by the park.  I don't know how to describe it.  The quality of some of the attractions at the park is really good, but the park itself just do 'it' for me.
 
Helix
Let's get this out the way.  Helix is truly fantastic.  It's got everything - a lengthy layout, inversions, speed, airtime, a nice style and good audio...everything.  And it all works, which is more important in some ways.  I really loved the style of the ride - the slightly futuristic / game feel just works SO WELL.  It's a bit of a shame that the queue is a bit worn - it needs a good clean and spruce up really.  But aside from that, I have no real flaws.  The ride is fantastic wherever you sit.  The back is fab.  The front gives you the force and speed.  And at night is great <3 It's just great!
 

 
Balder
Balder was a wonderful surprise.  So much airtime, a really decent layout, that's nicely concealed, and just really good fun.  It's glass smooth which makes it feel weird, but a good weird I s'pose.  It's easy to see why it's so highly rated, and it's high up on my list too - my favourite woodie for certain!
 

 
Lisebergbanan
This classic Schwarzkopf is perhaps a bit of a hidden gem in the park now.  Which sounds weird to say given it's not hidden at all.  But in a park with Helix, Balder and soon Valkyria screaming in your face, it's perhaps something which will slide out of view.  Lisebergbanan was the only coaster where staff didn't bother stapling me in on every go (the staff on Helix and Balder seemed determined to split me in half...), which resulted in some awesome airtime and being flung about in every direction.  We also had a couple of rides in the rain which really added to the experience.  Just a shame about that final brake...
 

 
Rebalder & Stampbanan
A couple of small creds finishes up the coaster line up.  Nothing special, but Rebalder ended up being my 100th cred - woohoo!
 
AeroSpin
I'd always wanted to try a Gerstlauer Sky Roller since I first saw them, so I was excited for this.  I rode is 3 times over the course of 2 days - I struggled on my first go to get any spins, but managed a solid 27 on my second go, which made me very queasy...  Goodness knows how people cope with 50+ spins...

 
Uppswinget
So this is basically Rush on a hill.  It has loads of potential, but it just didn't deliver.  The ride cycle was disappointing, and the location just didn't work - instead of making it more intimidating, it makes it less.  It meant the ride experience was rather lacking all in all.

 
AtmosFear
A really tall drop tower with Stealth-style restraints.  It was alright, gave nice views of Gothenburg, but that's about it.  I think after Detonator's forcefulness and brilliance, other drop towers feel lacking for me..

 
FlumeRide & Kallerado 
The park's log flume is a nice scenic tour really.  It's also gives a good pop as it starts down the drops.  Nothing special, but good fun!
The rapids were great - they start quite slow, but gradually builds up and up and it just works really well!

 
Liseberg Wheel
Oh god.  This was blooming awful.  It's a ferris wheel, but the loading procedures were bad.  It got every pod emptied / filled (which naturally takes ages), and then cycles round 3 times, and then starts the unload/load process again.  It's just so boring.  It didn't help the views were poor because of rainy weather, but even with clear weather, there's not that much you'd see again a second. third or fourth time round...

 
Loke & Mechanica
The two newest rides at the park; unfortunately they didn't appeal to me.  Loke, an Intamin gyroswing, is a ride that makes me feel awful after riding these days, so I didn't fancy it.  And I didn't want to waste time with Mechanica when there was other stuff I could do..
 
Majority of their other attractions are all standard stuff, and they weren't that great really.  A bit of a shame.  Their dark ride (which is closing soon / might already be closed?) was truly awful though.  However, one final noteworthy attraction...
 
Gasten Ghost Hotel
An upcharge scare attraction (priced £5/£7 depending on what ticket you have).  Themed around a spooky abandoned hotel which is over-run by spiders.  I hate spiders, which naturally put me on edge.  The maze was very good; a good length, VERY well themed, and some fantastic use of special effects (smell and feel were particular scents that were attacked!).  The only downside was that it lacked in actor numbers, which is a bit of a shame.  Nonetheless, a good scare attraction which did leave me cowering at some points...
 
 
On a more general note, operations at the park were generally very good and quick.  I'm not a fan of their shutdown policy (Helix shutdown when we were near the station, and it resulted in a full queue evac.  It opened about 10 minutes later and must surely have only been a small problem), but I guess that's a small grumble.  I love all of the sideshows and games they have - so many of them were themed which was fantastic, and they just had such a good atmosphere about them (it was also good that staff weren't pressuring people to play).  
 
 
So yeah, Liseberg was a weird one.  I enjoyed their 3 major coasters, and they have a couple of other good attractions.  But the park feels lacking in...something to me.  But I don't really know what.  Despite wanting to go back and ride Helix, Balder and Lisebergbanan, I don't really feel compelled to visit Liseberg as a park any time soon (even their new coaster isn't that tempting).  It's disappointing in some ways, as I want to like the park, but I just don't as much.  I think it's at least partially down to the fact it's more or less an amusement park, rather than a theme park, and I'm more of a theme park guy.
 
 

Phantasialand is one of my favourite theme parks, it may not be the biggest park out there, but they certainly know how to mix a combination of attractions within remarkable footprints.
 
Just over a year following my first visit, I decided to make a return visit for Winter to see the park beautifully lit up and decorated for Christmas.

Berlin Street, a beautiful park entrance (at least once you get past the street). It borrows some elements from Main Street but also makes it’s own in many ways too, like the Chairswing at the end and Fun House (Hotel Tartúff).

This time I finally got the chance to go through the Tartúff. I can safely say it’s one of the craziest (and longest) Funhouse attractions I have experienced. It must’ve taken at least 15minutes to walk through it. Worth the wait too.
 

Last time around I was criticised for not mentioning enough love for Chiapas. Here goes, Yes that’s an enhanced entrance too which looks amazing.




Words can it describe just how impressive and magical this attraction is, it’s such a happy upbeat attraction that aren’t common enough in main park’s. There is nothing I can fault about this attraction, from it’s dark segments, backwards drops and pacing throughout. The disco room is by far one of the best inventions in modern attractions. They even play a Christmas variant of the main theme too. Sheer perfection.
 
Subtle yet Christmassy.

Talocan was running just as impressively and intensely as last time. Certainly a stunning beast and just as much a show as a ride. Not one for after lunch.

Speaking on lunch, we went back to Rutmoore’s (which does these amazing hearty meals). The eatery is certainly holding it’s own with decorations too amongst delicious food.

Savoury Crepes Yum.

Taron is still absolutely amazing (and narrowly misses the top spot to Helix). I just adore the ride’s empowering launches, floaty airtime and interaction with nearby buildings and pathways. It’s just as much a piece of art as much as a coaster and much more than a series of twists and turns for sure.
 

Taron in the sunset looks even more beautiful for sure.
 
Whilst Klugheim is still park’s latest addition (Taron’s 120 minute queues are proof), it won’t be too long before the park’s next investment (albeit delayed until 2019) arrives, Rookburgh. Replacing the old Atlantis Simulator (removed before my first visit), the new area looks to boast a steampunk style theme, a surprising move away from the park’s signature rock Styles. Rockwork to Phantasialand is perhaps what shipping containers are to Merlin.
 

Whilst I am (naturally) highly excited this new area, I am going to be quite controversial now and say I’m slightly disappointed the area’s headline attraction looks to be another coaster (opposed to a dark ride). The park lost a major dark ride (Silvermine) so Taron could be built and I would like to see them gain a modern (animatronic heavy) dark ride. I’m sure Fly though will still be fantastic though and rumours suggest it will have dark ride elements which is a start.
 



Far on the other side of the park (away from the glamorous Chiapas and Klugheim) lies the sad sorry ageing duo that are Temple and Hollywood. It’s almost difficult to believe they are in the same park. The left side does generally feel noticeably inferior to the right, but then again it’s literally towards the back of resident’s gardens. I wouldn’t complain living there tbh. 
 
Some say these will be the next attractions to be ripped out from the park (to makeway for the next park redevelopment). Whilst I won’t shed a tear when Nighthawk goes (a 10 minute confused journey in pitch black darkness), I will miss the Hollywood ride just a bit. The cave, jaws and Frankenstein scenes are my favourites in this sorry forgotten dark ride.
 


I’m probably in the minority but I actually really like Geister Riksha. Although it is one of the park’s oldest attractions (it’s 36 years old) the ride still feels like it holds a place even in modern Phantasialand. It certainly fits in more then Temple and Hollywood and feels better looked after too. I would rather the attraction extensively updated than ripped out entirely should China ever become redeveloped.

Spot the mistake.
 
Black Mamba was still amazing, Colorado crazy in the best way and Mystery Castle somewhat on the shorter setting. I enjoyed Maus Au Chocolate more this time which is great to see so much theming between the screens. Winjas Fear is definitely the better track. Bizarrely we had to enter through a back route to the entrances due to the main area playing home to a private function. 
 
Due to a national holiday, there was no music on the second day in many park areas until 6pm.
 





Phantasialand at night just looks absolutely spectacular, here’s the China Area. Whilst this area doesn’t House the park’s best rides it’s still one of my favourite areas in the park. That said I like 
pretty much all the areas of the park, the Fantasy not so much though.












Absolutely stunning. I don’t think these photos give the park justice.

The park at Winter also plays home to not one, but two night-time shows. The first one of these uses the park’s ice rink where numerous costumes performers actout. The loose plot basically comes down to something ruining Christmas and someone coming along saving it and ending on a firework finale.
 
The second show features a projection/fire show around the Chiapas ride plaza. Unfortunately no photography was permitted (Phantasialand are quite notoriously for being one of the stricter parks for this), so I wasn’t able to get any pics as I didn’t fancy getting shouted at in German.
 
I definitely enjoyed both shows for what they were but wouldn’t necessarily say they were out standing. They certainly weren’t terrible either. Perhaps my insufficient German didn’t help.

During my visit  I was very fortunate to stay at Hotel Lingbao, which was just stunning. I absolutely fell l in love with the place from it’s oriental styling to it’s quaint surroundings. Many of the items in this hotel are said to have actually come from China itself.


Would strongly recommend staying here if you can as it’s definitely worth it. Otherwise H+ is a suitable place if you are on a budget.
 

On the second day, we ventured (or should I say attempted) some cultural stuff in Cologne. Unfortunately this wasn’t as successful as hoped due to the Chocolate Museum being closed, but we did what we could out of it.

Cologne Lock bridge.

I also had my first Hard Rock Cafe experience here. I strongly enjoyed this (however Tomb thought it was average). Not sure how others compare.

Old Cologne. Sadly most of Cologne is modern brutal buildings. I’ll let Basil Fawlty do the explaining.

Tradional German Market, we actually visited two but I definitely preferred this one.

Random animatronic goodness. You can pay a euro for the duo to play a tune of your choice whilst drinking beer. 

I will end this update with Cologne Cathedral at night. 
 
If the closed season becomes too much, just book a winter trip to Phantasialand (opening hours vary). Merry Christmas!

If 2015 and 2016 were anything, empty would be the main word. I'd lost my coaster enthusiasm in a big way with only trips to the Disney parks across Florida, California and Paris being real highlights, their blend of capacity, good hours and efficiency being real draws. Any time I'd visited Merlin parks, I'd been frustrated with just how boring and badly run they had become. If I remember 2017 for anything, it would be the year that I got back into theme parks in a big way. It happened relatively late on in the year though, with only a trip to Disneyland Paris in February before the 25th anniversary celebrations begun.
 
I had been planning a trip with a few others for the beginning of April. This was the real kickstarter frankly. Parc Asterix, Nigloland, Holiday Park, Phantasialand, Movie Park Germany and Efteling on the agenda. This was a sublime trip with big parks and some fantastic rides. I could wax lyrical about Alpina Blitz at Niglo for hours. This to me is why Mack rides are so exciting. Intense, full of air time, perfect restraint systems and operations. It's been a long time since I've gone back again and again for a rollercoaster, let alone ride that same ride 10 times in a day. But Alpina Blitz is something special. This is why the idea of Icon at Blackpool is so exciting because Mack rides are rerideable and damn good fun.

 
Getting back on Oz'Iris, Black Mamba and Taron filled me with delight too. I always wondered if I had just over-rated Oz'Iris back when I first rode it but now I know that I hadn't. It's a genuinely good, unique inverter and the operations were absolutely perfect. Whilst Tonnere de Zeus was a bit disappointing this time around, I still maintain that Goudurix is just brilliantly awful. The thrill comes from wondering if you will survive.
 
I was still disappointed with Expedition Ge Force. I know why people like it and even get why this was rated Number one rollercoaster for years But we've moved on now and the stupid loading procedures and strictness of the ride holds it back in so many ways. Don't ride Alpina Blitz the day before is all I can advise. A ride that did surprise was Van Helsing at Movie Park. Wow. It's just a simple Gerstlauer bobsled but it was a big shock at how good it was. Very forceful cornering that compete with our own Rattlesnake at Chessington. The final park was Efteling which I wish we had longer at. It's back on the agenda for 2018 because I just didn't feel like I got the full Efteling experience. I really liked Baron 1898 for what its worth and the fairy dark ride was pure class from start to finish.

(side note, has anyone seen that seven rollercoasters you need to ride in 2018 video thats been going around? Why is Baron even on that list?!)
 
With that excitement over the next trip was IMO the best park in the world, Europa Park. It's no secret that I love Europa and every time I go it surprises and delights at every turn. It was weirdly quiet, managed to stay on Blue Fire twice in a row for example and we didn't really queue longer then 20 minutes for Arthur. We didn't know it was to be our last rides on EuroSat 1. It was running fantastically well. There's something about these older dark rides that just surprise at every turn. Wodan was also running fantastically. Every successive trip, it just seems to get better and better. Whilst I prefer Blue Fire, Wodan really is a great coaster. Coupled onto this trip was a few days at Paris to do all the 25th anniversary shows and to experience Hyperspace Mountain. Yuck. I don't really like it when a ride like Space Mountain has a theme chucked at it in such a haphazard way. The new trains are fine, but the use of Star Wars doesn't work here. New Illuminations is also not very good. There I said it. Stop trying to sell me your brands in such a blatant way. 
 
July time and it was off to Walygator for Monster. This is a pretty damn good B&M and whilst Walygator is a bit of a dump, Monster almost makes up for it.

 
One final trip to Paris happened (annual pass fun) and then November and off to Florida for a two week vacation. (lol America)
 
I'll first talk about Busch Gardens and Seaworld before descending into Disney. Do Busch and Seaworld ever get busy? For example, I've never queued longer then 10 minutes at Busch for anything. Walk on Montu, Cheetah Hunt is lovely but surely it shouldn't be that way in Florida. Suffice to say my feelings for certain rides has changed. I'm not sure what they've done to Kumba for example but it felt like the wheels were squares. It was running quite roughly throughout whilst was slightly disappointing as I'd previously loved it. Montu was fine but it really doesn't compare to Oz'iris, Monster, Nemesis. It's first half is fine, but the second half is just the train wondering around finding its way to the ending. Sheikra is excellent. So much force and air time throughout. I hear that it's hated in theme park circles and I really don't get why.

Cobras Curse was new last year and seemed to be having a lot of problems. We managed two rides and it was an okay enough ride but was a bit haphazard in its execution. 
 
Seaworld has three top quality rollercoasters and thats it. Luckily, these are B&M"s and three very strong ones at that. I'll start with Kraken (or Kraken Unleashed) which has been completely wrecked by VR. I'm not sure how the queue works anymore because the queue is closed off with a gate for the whole day and you have to ask to ride without VR. If you want VR you have to grab a virtual queue ticket. You could easily lie however and just queue normally and get straight on. But if you have a virtual queueing ticket you get priority onto the ride and can still just choose not to use the VR if you so desire. It was weird. The VR is fine but again it take away from the quality B&M experience you could be having instead. I'd never really liked Kraken that much before but I really enjoyed it this time around. It felt a bit rough around the edges and less smoother then before so maybe I like the more visceral experience.
 
Manta is excellent. The flyer is a bit of an under-rated gem in Europe to be honest and its a shame its never really taken off because from what I've seen and experienced, the flyer is the most intense B&M product available. I know some don't like pretzel loops but I absolutely adore them. MORE PRETZEL LOOPS PLEASE.

 
And finally... Mako. My experience with B&M Hypers is ashamedly lacking. I've only been on Silver Star and Shambhala so far so I was looking forward to Mako. A few things with this first. Most hypers have nine rows, Mako has seven so it looks really short and oddly shaped compared to the norm. I think this may explain why Mako is so much more airtimey and 'intense' compared to the others I've been on because the air time here was far more in the Intamin category of air time then the norm. The first half of Mako is excellent and surprisingly intense. It felt far more violent that I'm accustomed to from Shambhala for example which takes everything far more calmly. Mako isn't like this at all. What does take away its edge though is two trim breaks. WHY DO THEY DO THIS. Mako has two and the first nearly kills an air time hill, the second makes for a poorer ending then Mako really deserves. What Mako does do is deliver another excellent B&M for Seaworld who IMO have one of the strongest B&M line ups in the world. There, I said it. 

 
So Disney World. This was all really about Animal Kingdom frankly.  It delivered. There's a slight bit of animosity towards Pandora: The Land of Avatar and I get where that comes from. But it pales into significance of how incredible the area is. It's immersive, its full of little details and each walk through of the area is full of surprises. It's particularly amazing at night when the pathways come to life, full of colour, the plants shine, the waterfalls glisten. 

There are two rides in the area. Flights of Passage is the big one which gets 180 minute queues from the start, all the way to the end of the day. The other is Navi River Journey, a small boat ride that takes you through the land of Pandora. For all my money (and worth), I think Navi River Journey is the better ride. This goes slightly against the grain but to me, I prefer the physicality of River Journey with a particularly impressive animatronic. Flights of Passage only just justifies its long queue time and if I was being cruel, it's just a slightly more impressive Star Tours. There's no doubt that what Disney have done here is tried to put you on a journey, to wake you up to the damage being done to our world, albeit very subtlety. I just find the pre-shows over long and full of faff, impressive faff but faff nonetheless.
 
What does impress however is Expedition Everest at night. Disney are the masters at lighting and riding Everest in pitch darkness has to rate as one of my favourite rollercoaster experiences. Rivers of Lights, Animal Kingdoms new night-time show is impressive in its small scale. It's not like the castle firework shows where its essentially a Disney clip show. RoL is about how we live with animals and our bond with nature. I really liked it. 
 
Nothing to really report about Hollywood Studios and Epcot was it's usual retirement home of locals and retail. Frozen Ever After is fine if unremarkable but just about enough to justify its queue times. Happily Ever After, the new firework show at Magic Kingdom is fantastic. The Christmas event was fun but no way on earth am I queuing three hours to meet Moana.

 
And with that another theme park year is over. It's been one where I finally feel back into the theme park groove. Hope this wasn't to long a read and congratulations if you've made it to the end.
 

Following the recent-ish announcement of The Walking Dead coming to Thorpe, I thought I'd share a review of TWD: Breakout, Movie Park Germany's 5 Euro upcharge scare attraction.  And also share some expectations I have for Living Nightmare and Sanctum as a result..
 
I have to say, I was really looking forward to this.  Movie Park are well known for this Halloween event, and they continually bring in big name IPs as well as original concepts (this year, they've got an 18+ maze themed to the Hostel series which looks to be at least partially an alone experience for example), so that sets a certain bar.  The maze itself was really pushed hard, on the website, on leaflets, on the park map and on park too - it was almost like it was a crowning success for the park; their gem along with their big new ride.  They advertised "the latest technologies" which helped achieve special effects, along with the standard 'intense, scary' jargon that most mazes get.  And even though I haven't watched the TV show (and still haven't yet), I knew how much scope the franchise has.
 
Breakout Review
Warning - spoilers
 
After doing some queueing in some shipping containers, you reach the entrance of the maze, which is themed around the Harrison Memorial Hospital (apparently from the first series).  You could hear lots of banging to the right of the wall, which I thought was a bit of a spoiler, since an actor was bound to appear.  
 
You get batched in in groups of about 8, and encouraged to stay together, but it's not a conga line maze.  The first scene just ends up being a standard safety scene (delivered on TVs in multiple languages), and then an actor appears from a hidden route to your left (despite the loud noises you hear outside coming from what should be your right).  It was a clever bit of misdirection, and though not scary, showed some promise.  The actor then chases away to go down the corridor on your right, banging the walls to encourage you to leave..
 
Unfortunately from here, things go downhill.  You walk past the famous 'Don't Open, Dead Inside' doors, with no sort of effects or actor or special lighting or anything; a particularly disappointing thing since that was so widely pushed in advertised.  An actor appeared, shouting 'Boo', and doing some general arm waving to try and invade our personal space.  No context to the scenes, and I realised that it was actually the same actor as from the first scene, which begun to ring alarm bells as to the number of actors.
 
You continue through more scenes, which are very well themed, but had little sound effects and no special effects.  Occasionally an actor appeared, but they all did the same thing - shout 'boo' and walk like a zombie who'd an accident in their underwear...  Though the theming was nice, you weren't given any chance to really interact with it - you were always well away from anything of note, and given tonnes of space with nothing filling it.  It was the worst thing a scare maze can be - boring.  
 
The ending was cliche to say the least...  Large open space, couple of barrels and a door at the end of the room.  Oh, except a big burly man with a chainsaw appears out of nowhere by the door.  Been there, done that.  However, a tiny ray in the ending was the fact that the actor kicked down a barrel onto the floor, creating a huge, echoing thud - easily the biggest scare in the maze, and shows that there was at least a glimmer of thought put into 'how can we actually scare people' when designing the maze.  
 
So yeah, TWD: Breakout was a very poor maze.  Few actors, little-to-no use of standard scare tactics introduced and nothing exciting or interesting to go with it.  Maybe having done a few good mazes over the years has hardened me up a bit too much, but there was just nothing of note.
 
Thorpe Expectations
 
Something which still sticks in my mind about Breakout is how well themed the maze was, and how well designed the sets were.  Looking at photos of the maze and looking at images from the show, they are very similar down to the small details.  So I expect that AMC / Fox have quite high expectations and demands about the theming of the maze that have to be met.  Given the Paragon Creative have been spotted on park (the company who also did a great job when making Saw Alive!), I expect that those expectations will be met, especially with Living Nightmare.
 
From the brief description that Thorpe have released, it sounds like Living Nightmare will be in a similar vain to Breakout in that there are a variety of scenes from the show in the maze that you go through, except that they are including Season 7 in there.  Also, as we're told that we can "choose your path and decide your fate", there might be the possibility of multiple routes akin to Cabin - a nice touch which works nicely with the 'assorted scene' vibe.  
 
I must admit I'm concerned about what sort of scares we're in for.  Thorpe have gotten a reputation that their style of scare is 'growl in people's face, brush against their arm and slam against a wall' and move on.  Though I don't strictly agree with this (and we've seen them move away from that with the likes of Big Top, Blair Witch and Platform 15 in my opinion), I certainly see where people are coming from.  And it feels almost inevitable that we could be in for that treatment here.  I'd really love to see some effects that play on the senses more here - smells are something which are particularly under-used by Thorpe.  And I feel like having a hospital scene, for example, which is literally 'cold' would work well.  Couple in some other effects here and there, and it would work really well.  But I'm just not sure we're in for that.  
 
As for Sanctum, given it's said to be an outdoor maze, and from the little we've seen of it, I get a feeling like it will be a bigger, better, more-coherently themed version of Dead End.  The general story seems to be 'death and destruction wasteland, you enter a safe bit, but oh wait, it's not safe' - something that Thorpe can do well.  The containers could act as means to create a long route to walk around, and be used for impact scares.  Chuck in a couple of set pieces and bits and bobs and it'll be a fun little maze.  I'm not expecting anything groundbreaking, but it has the potential to be a perfect filler maze, as well as helping spread the crowds around.
 
 
tl;dr - Germany's Walking Dead maze is on the whole, naff, but the theming is good.  I expect good theming at Thorpe and hope they can produce something different in terms of scares.

So I'm skipping Phantasialand because everyone knows I think it's the best and I'm behind on writing TRs and stuff.  So yeah, do excuse the delay and what will be rushed TRs, which will largely just be reviews of rides in no particular order of riding them...
 
Movie Park was a park I had reasonably low expectations about.  There wasn't many raved about, and any reviews of the park I had read always mentioned long queues, that their Fastrack was a saviour and people always having a sour taste in their mouth at the end of the day.  In fact the only real positives I had heard about the park was about its Halloween event.  These fears weren't helped when park close was extended from 5pm to 6pm, suggesting the park would be quite busy.  But for late June, it wasn't that busy, everything was manageable and it was a decent day.
 
Star Trek:  Operation Enterprise
The new-for-2017, triple Mack launch coaster was the big draw for finally deciding to pay MPG a visit.  Figuring it would have long queues, we headed their first - annoyingly the ride is basically the first thing you see at the entrance, but the ride entrance is in the middle of the park.  Fortunately we were first in the queue.  There was a few minute delay as we waited for a couple more test runs, but no issue.
 
The indoor queue line is nice, but a bit too clinical.  I get that this is the theme, but it just feels a bit uninteresting, even after a short while.  What follows are 2 pre-shows, with screens which give a back story from characters from the show (spoken in Germany, but with English subtitles), as well as a staff member guiding you through.  They are nice, and the rooms are nicely themed, but they do go on too long for my liking.  
 
We got to the station and were on the second train (being first in the pre shows doesn't guarantee first in the station).  The ride itself is fun.  The traverser taking you to the launch track is in another very white room, which again feels quite boring.  The launches are nice and smooth; they're certainly not fast but that's not really the point I feel.  The inversions are taken quite slowly, giving a brilliant amount of hang time.  Towards the end of the course there's an amazing bit of airtime which really got me.  It's over quite quickly, but doesn't leave you feeling short changed fortunately.  You do seem to spend an age waiting on the break run though, which feels even longer as there's not much to look at.
 
After our ride, we noticed there was no one in the station (people were being held up by pre show!), so we were able to get a re-ride immediately.  Though this didn't happen later in the day when we rode again, it makes me wonder how sustainable the pre shows are in their current format.  Staff seemed to have iPads showing where groups should be, radios to communicate to each other and god knows what else.  Seemed like a very faffy system for not a lot of pay off!
 



 
Van Helsing's Factory
This was perhaps the only ride I'd heard good things about before visiting.  And I can see why.  The theming is fantastic, the layout is fun and works well with the theming.  The general mood and atmosphere is brilliant.  Just everything about this ride works well together.  Even the queue line, exit and shop just feels so right and complete.  It's a fantastic example showing that a ride as a whole starts the moment you enter the queue (and even when you just see building!), and finishes the moment you leave the shop.  This was a true gem and possibly the biggest surprise of the trip.  The fact that our first ride we queued about 40-45 minutes (basically the longest queue of the trip) and I loved it right away shows its quality.  Plus things quietened as the day went on, meaning several re-rides.
 



 
Bandit
We did the park's wooden coaster in the afternoon, and the queue time was displayed as an hour.  Fortunately it was no where near that (15mins); seems Movie Park just update their queue times to the longest they get all day and leave them like that..  The ride looked like it had potential, but unfortunately fails to deliver.  Every time it looks like it can pick up speed, or produce a decent moment of airtime, it just...doesn't?  And that's the worst thing about this - excitement builds and builds, and it never delivers.
 
It was so uninteresting, I didn't get any photos..
 
MP Express
This was a Vekoma SLC.  It was like any other Vekoma SLC - naff.  The first half of the ride was actually not awfully and shows why SLCs can get decent rides.  The second half was extremely painful, and right down there with the god awful El Condor at Walibi Holland.  
 

 
The Lost Temple
Tucked away near the front of the park, Lost Temple is an immersive tunnel themed around finding a lost temple - shock horror - and uncovering dinosaurs and stuff.  It features several burdenous pre shows (one of which was a real lift which we thought was fake!), and lots of faffing around between pre shows.  The 'experience' as a whole took about 30 minutes, so thank goodness the park wasn't too busy otherwise that would have been a huge chunk of the day gone.  The tunnel itself was meh; the Bobbejaanland one was a bit better really.  The exit pathway and queue to the ride is decent though.
 


 
Bermuda Triangle
Another ride tucked at the entrance to the park (and easily missed!).  This dark boat ride was literally walk on.  I really don't know how to describe this.  The ride starts off outside, before taking you into a volcano.  There were times inside when I didn't know if I was dropping, going up or what.  The theming inside is good, but obviously quite dated - along with the theme itself.  The finale is being taken up a lift in a very misty, very warm part of the volcano, before dropping outside and splashing down.  There's usually a huge amount of mist before a boat drops down, and there were occasional fire effects from the top of the volcano.  It's a really good, yet really bizarre, ride.  I'm gutted I didn't actually take any pictures of it.
 
We tried to get a reride at about 5:20, but when we got to the entrance the entrance board said it closed at 5:15 (even though it definitely said 5:30 when we went there earlier).  There was no queue, and I'm pretty certain the ride has stopped running shortly afterwards.  A frustrating situation.
 
Nick Land
Nick land featured some randoms kiddie rides, some family rides and some coasters.  One coaster, the Jimmy Neutron themed Vekoma SFC, was closed all day.  Annoying spite.  One coaster was a Vekoma rollerskater "themed" to the Backyardians.  We more or less got straight on.  It was meh.  There was also a Spongebob "themed" Wild Mouse, which was alright.  We also did the Dora the Explorer "themed" log flume, which got me drenched to the bone.  
 
I don't really have much else to say.  Nick Land looked quite out of place compared to large proportions of the park.  It felt very run down, the theming was minimal to non-existent, and I really feel like the park could do a lot better.
 

 
Mystery River
This Neverending Story esque rapids ride is tucked tight at the back of Nick Land, and turned out to be a neat little surprise.  I'd say it's in my top 3 rapids rides; it has a good length, decent amount of theming and an acceptable level of wetness.  It's also helped by the fact that you basically can't see the ride at all from anywhere on park, so you really have no idea what is coming.  The biggest disappoint is that you have to survive walking through Nick Land to get to it.
 

 
Crazy Cops Stunt Show
I love a good stunt show, and we wandered into this show not really knowing what to expect, aside from screeching tires and loud noises.  This ended up being really good, featuring a decent level of stunts featuring cars, bikes and falls, as well as some decent effects, slapstick comedy and an easy-to-follow 'story' of sorts.  It was just great fun to watch, and a great way to break up the day.  It's a shame things like this aren't as common in the UK any more..
 
The High Fall
A tall drop tower with nice views of the park, a bit of suspense and tilting seats.  Pretty good fun all in all.  
Tip - if anyone ever visits and sees a long queue for this, just do a double check.  The indoor queue is a cattlepen where one wall is a mirror and makes the queue look double in length.  Caught us out first time..
 

 
There was some other stuff around the park, including a simulator featuring massive sets and John Cleese, which was meh, a few nicely themed or styled flats that we didn't bother with (Top Spin, Disk'o, Rockin' Tug, etc).  But the final thing of note I want to mention...
 
The Walking Dead - Breakout
A year-round horror maze with a 5 euro upcharge, Walking Dead - Breakout felt like it had a lot to live up to, since the park was apparently good at Halloween and with its scare mazes.  Plus the fact Walking Dead is a huge brand and has mazes at several locations, it felt like it had to be good for Movie Park to be a deserving park to have it.  
 
The maze is open 1-4pm, and we bought out tickets online and booked for 1pm.  Unfortunately the time slot system is non existent and you turn up whenever you want.  
 
Even more unfortunate is the fact that the maze is terrible.  It's themed nicely, but there's no real scares, no opportunity for scares, not enough actors, no real scary atmosphere.  It's just terrible.  It terms of actual frights, I'd say it's comparable to Platform 15 (a maze notoriously known not to be able to offer many scares last year).  This really was a crying shame, a huge disappointment - possible my personal biggest disappoint at any park across Europe.
 
 
And so that's that.  Movie Park Germany is perhaps a little underrated, though Star Trek definitely improves the line up.  They've got a couple of solid coasters, a decent dark and water ride collection and the odd sparkle across flats and live entertainment.  Certainly not a park I'd call a must-do, but definitely worth looking into at the very least.
 
 
Next up (and hopefully before Christmas...) - Efteling!
 

So I'm skipping Phantasialand because everyone knows I think it's the best and I'm behind on writing TRs and stuff.  So yeah, do excuse the delay and what will be rushed TRs, which will largely just be reviews of rides in no particular order of riding them...
 
Movie Park was a park I had reasonably low expectations about.  There wasn't many raved about, and any reviews of the park I had read always mentioned long queues, that their Fastrack was a saviour and people always having a sour taste in their mouth at the end of the day.  In fact the only real positives I had heard about the park was about its Halloween event.  These fears weren't helped when park close was extended from 5pm to 6pm, suggesting the park would be quite busy.  But for late June, it wasn't that busy, everything was manageable and it was a decent day.
 
Star Trek:  Operation Enterprise
The new-for-2017, triple Mack launch coaster was the big draw for finally deciding to pay MPG a visit.  Figuring it would have long queues, we headed their first - annoyingly the ride is basically the first thing you see at the entrance, but the ride entrance is in the middle of the park.  Fortunately we were first in the queue.  There was a few minute delay as we waited for a couple more test runs, but no issue.
 
The indoor queue line is nice, but a bit too clinical.  I get that this is the theme, but it just feels a bit uninteresting, even after a short while.  What follows are 2 pre-shows, with screens which give a back story from characters from the show (spoken in Germany, but with English subtitles), as well as a staff member guiding you through.  They are nice, and the rooms are nicely themed, but they do go on too long for my liking.  
 
We got to the station and were on the second train (being first in the pre shows doesn't guarantee first in the station).  The ride itself is fun.  The traverser taking you to the launch track is in another very white room, which again feels quite boring.  The launches are nice and smooth; they're certainly not fast but that's not really the point I feel.  The inversions are taken quite slowly, giving a brilliant amount of hang time.  Towards the end of the course there's an amazing bit of airtime which really got me.  It's over quite quickly, but doesn't leave you feeling short changed fortunately.  You do seem to spend an age waiting on the break run though, which feels even longer as there's not much to look at.
 
After our ride, we noticed there was no one in the station (people were being held up by pre show!), so we were able to get a re-ride immediately.  Though this didn't happen later in the day when we rode again, it makes me wonder how sustainable the pre shows are in their current format.  Staff seemed to have iPads showing where groups should be, radios to communicate to each other and god knows what else.  Seemed like a very faffy system for not a lot of pay off!
 



 
Van Helsing's Factory
This was perhaps the only ride I'd heard good things about before visiting.  And I can see why.  The theming is fantastic, the layout is fun and works well with the theming.  The general mood and atmosphere is brilliant.  Just everything about this ride works well together.  Even the queue line, exit and shop just feels so right and complete.  It's a fantastic example showing that a ride as a whole starts the moment you enter the queue (and even when you just see building!), and finishes the moment you leave the shop.  This was a true gem and possibly the biggest surprise of the trip.  The fact that our first ride we queued about 40-45 minutes (basically the longest queue of the trip) and I loved it right away shows its quality.  Plus things quietened as the day went on, meaning several re-rides.
 



 
Bandit
We did the park's wooden coaster in the afternoon, and the queue time was displayed as an hour.  Fortunately it was no where near that (15mins); seems Movie Park just update their queue times to the longest they get all day and leave them like that..  The ride looked like it had potential, but unfortunately fails to deliver.  Every time it looks like it can pick up speed, or produce a decent moment of airtime, it just...doesn't?  And that's the worst thing about this - excitement builds and builds, and it never delivers.
 
It was so uninteresting, I didn't get any photos..
 
MP Express
This was a Vekoma SLC.  It was like any other Vekoma SLC - naff.  The first half of the ride was actually not awfully and shows why SLCs can get decent rides.  The second half was extremely painful, and right down there with the god awful El Condor at Walibi Holland.  
 

 
The Lost Temple
Tucked away near the front of the park, Lost Temple is an immersive tunnel themed around finding a lost temple - shock horror - and uncovering dinosaurs and stuff.  It features several burdenous pre shows (one of which was a real lift which we thought was fake!), and lots of faffing around between pre shows.  The 'experience' as a whole took about 30 minutes, so thank goodness the park wasn't too busy otherwise that would have been a huge chunk of the day gone.  The tunnel itself was meh; the Bobbejaanland one was a bit better really.  The exit pathway and queue to the ride is decent though.
 


 
Bermuda Triangle
Another ride tucked at the entrance to the park (and easily missed!).  This dark boat ride was literally walk on.  I really don't know how to describe this.  The ride starts off outside, before taking you into a volcano.  There were times inside when I didn't know if I was dropping, going up or what.  The theming inside is good, but obviously quite dated - along with the theme itself.  The finale is being taken up a lift in a very misty, very warm part of the volcano, before dropping outside and splashing down.  There's usually a huge amount of mist before a boat drops down, and there were occasional fire effects from the top of the volcano.  It's a really good, yet really bizarre, ride.  I'm gutted I didn't actually take any pictures of it.
 
We tried to get a reride at about 5:20, but when we got to the entrance the entrance board said it closed at 5:15 (even though it definitely said 5:30 when we went there earlier).  There was no queue, and I'm pretty certain the ride has stopped running shortly afterwards.  A frustrating situation.
 
Nick Land
Nick land featured some randoms kiddie rides, some family rides and some coasters.  One coaster, the Jimmy Neutron themed Vekoma SFC, was closed all day.  Annoying spite.  One coaster was a Vekoma rollerskater "themed" to the Backyardians.  We more or less got straight on.  It was meh.  There was also a Spongebob "themed" Wild Mouse, which was alright.  We also did the Dora the Explorer "themed" log flume, which got me drenched to the bone.  
 
I don't really have much else to say.  Nick Land looked quite out of place compared to large proportions of the park.  It felt very run down, the theming was minimal to non-existent, and I really feel like the park could do a lot better.
 

 
Mystery River
This Neverending Story esque rapids ride is tucked tight at the back of Nick Land, and turned out to be a neat little surprise.  I'd say it's in my top 3 rapids rides; it has a good length, decent amount of theming and an acceptable level of wetness.  It's also helped by the fact that you basically can't see the ride at all from anywhere on park, so you really have no idea what is coming.  The biggest disappoint is that you have to survive walking through Nick Land to get to it.
 

 
Crazy Cops Stunt Show
I love a good stunt show, and we wandered into this show not really knowing what to expect, aside from screeching tires and loud noises.  This ended up being really good, featuring a decent level of stunts featuring cars, bikes and falls, as well as some decent effects, slapstick comedy and an easy-to-follow 'story' of sorts.  It was just great fun to watch, and a great way to break up the day.  It's a shame things like this aren't as common in the UK any more..
 
The High Fall
A tall drop tower with nice views of the park, a bit of suspense and tilting seats.  Pretty good fun all in all.  
Tip - if anyone ever visits and sees a long queue for this, just do a double check.  The indoor queue is a cattlepen where one wall is a mirror and makes the queue look double in length.  Caught us out first time..
 

 
There was some other stuff around the park, including a simulator featuring massive sets and John Cleese, which was meh, a few nicely themed or styled flats that we didn't bother with (Top Spin, Disk'o, Rockin' Tug, etc).  But the final thing of note I want to mention...
 
The Walking Dead - Breakout
A year-round horror maze with a 5 euro upcharge, Walking Dead - Breakout felt like it had a lot to live up to, since the park was apparently good at Halloween and with its scare mazes.  Plus the fact Walking Dead is a huge brand and has mazes at several locations, it felt like it had to be good for Movie Park to be a deserving park to have it.  
 
The maze is open 1-4pm, and we bought out tickets online and booked for 1pm.  Unfortunately the time slot system is non existent and you turn up whenever you want.  
 
Even more unfortunate is the fact that the maze is terrible.  It's themed nicely, but there's no real scares, no opportunity for scares, not enough actors, no real scary atmosphere.  It's just terrible.  It terms of actual frights, I'd say it's comparable to Platform 15 (a maze notoriously known not to be able to offer many scares last year).  This really was a crying shame, a huge disappointment - possible my personal biggest disappoint at any park across Europe.
 
 
And so that's that.  Movie Park Germany is perhaps a little underrated, though Star Trek definitely improves the line up.  They've got a couple of solid coasters, a decent dark and water ride collection and the odd sparkle across flats and live entertainment.  Certainly not a park I'd call a must-do, but definitely worth looking into at the very least.
 
 
Next up (and hopefully before Christmas...) - Efteling!
 

To me, Symbolica was the biggest new European attraction for 2017 for theme parks. It's not exactly a difficult feat to achieve, with little of note actually happening this year. But I found the prospect of Efteling, a park known for creating highly detailed and love dark rides, investing their biggest sum in a ride ever, much more exciting than Port Aventura sticking Ferrari Land at the edge of their park and adding a taller and faster Stealth to their line up.
 
It's difficult to review a dark ride without giving spoilers, but I'm going to try my best to not spoil anything. Knowing as little about Symbolica will, of course, be advantageous if you come to ride it - though if spoilers are really your thing, just check out Efteling's YouTube...
 
For some context, the storyline of Symbolica is simple - you're have a feast with the King, but Pardoes, the King's jester, has other ideas and takes you on a behind the scenes tour of the 'Palace of Fantasy'. The pre show sets this story up brilliantly, is easily understood in any language, includes 2 incredible animatronics and a real piece of magic which bought a huge smile to my face.
 
After the pre show, you make your way down the cellars of the palace towards the station. Symbolica has 3 slightly different routes you can take (themed as 'tours' - Music, Knights and Treasure), and you choose these after the pre show but before you board. After doing all 3, they're all of equal standard, and don't differ THAT much, but each one has its own special little feature.
 
The ride itself is trackless, with 2 rows of 3. You go around the palace, exploring several different rooms, whilst Pardoes makes an appearance and does some magical stuff. Each scene is very Efteling, in that it's just whimsical, magical and doesn't quite make sense (in a good way!). Most importantly to me though, there are no dead spots and no wasted moments. Each transition between scenes is themed and makes sense. Each scene is themed 360 degrees. Everything flows in its own weird sort of way. This was a huge issue I had with all other Efteling dark rides (and indeed many dark rides in general) - they either have dead spots where nothing happens, other there's some part of the rooms which are unthemed and make no sense with what's going on. Symbolica, in that sense, is perfect to me.
 
An interesting feature is that the front row has 2 touchscreens. These screens allow the front row to choose their language (it doesn't affect any audio, it's just a message at the start and end of ride), make some of the animatronics do 'things' during the ride, and make your vehicle 'dance' during the finale. It's an interesting idea, but doesn't quite work - I found it more of a distraction during the ride, and it never really added much. Also, it leaves the back row a bit left out - why they couldn't have one screen per row confuses me.
 
So yeah, in short - Symbolica really is a fab attraction. It's clear to see where the 35 million euro budget went, it looks and feels great, it's interesting and immersive to be in and, most importantly, it is fun. Efteling are onto a winner of an attraction, and definitely worth a trip!

To me, Symbolica was the biggest new European attraction for 2017 for theme parks. It's not exactly a difficult feat to achieve, with little of note actually happening this year. But I found the prospect of Efteling, a park known for creating highly detailed and love dark rides, investing their biggest sum in a ride ever, much more exciting than Port Aventura sticking Ferrari Land at the edge of their park and adding a taller and faster Stealth to their line up.
 
It's difficult to review a dark ride without giving spoilers, but I'm going to try my best to not spoil anything. Knowing as little about Symbolica will, of course, be advantageous if you come to ride it - though if spoilers are really your thing, just check out Efteling's YouTube...
 
For some context, the storyline of Symbolica is simple - you're have a feast with the King, but Pardoes, the King's jester, has other ideas and takes you on a behind the scenes tour of the 'Palace of Fantasy'. The pre show sets this story up brilliantly, is easily understood in any language, includes 2 incredible animatronics and a real piece of magic which bought a huge smile to my face.
 
After the pre show, you make your way down the cellars of the palace towards the station. Symbolica has 3 slightly different routes you can take (themed as 'tours' - Music, Knights and Treasure), and you choose these after the pre show but before you board. After doing all 3, they're all of equal standard, and don't differ THAT much, but each one has its own special little feature.
 
The ride itself is trackless, with 2 rows of 3. You go around the palace, exploring several different rooms, whilst Pardoes makes an appearance and does some magical stuff. Each scene is very Efteling, in that it's just whimsical, magical and doesn't quite make sense (in a good way!). Most importantly to me though, there are no dead spots and no wasted moments. Each transition between scenes is themed and makes sense. Each scene is themed 360 degrees. Everything flows in its own weird sort of way. This was a huge issue I had with all other Efteling dark rides (and indeed many dark rides in general) - they either have dead spots where nothing happens, other there's some part of the rooms which are unthemed and make no sense with what's going on. Symbolica, in that sense, is perfect to me.
 
An interesting feature is that the front row has 2 touchscreens. These screens allow the front row to choose their language (it doesn't affect any audio, it's just a message at the start and end of ride), make some of the animatronics do 'things' during the ride, and make your vehicle 'dance' during the finale. It's an interesting idea, but doesn't quite work - I found it more of a distraction during the ride, and it never really added much. Also, it leaves the back row a bit left out - why they couldn't have one screen per row confuses me.
 
So yeah, in short - Symbolica really is a fab attraction. It's clear to see where the 35 million euro budget went, it looks and feels great, it's interesting and immersive to be in and, most importantly, it is fun. Efteling are onto a winner of an attraction, and definitely worth a trip!

Hello again, long time no see. It's been a quick six month break since I've been on here, since my 'emotional' breakdown a few months back. In that time, my love for rollercoasters has been reinvigorated without the related cynicism that forums can sometimes create. I thought I'd do a blog of somewhat of what I've been up to. 
 
April 2017 - France/Germany road trip
 
Three months ago, (where has the time gone), myself along with Peaj, Dan and Fred went on a six park trip across Western Europe parks. The aim was for everyone to grab the odd new B&M, Intamin and new parks galore. For all of us, the only new park was Movie Park Germany. I have to admit our trip was oddly planned, we somehow missed all the new rides that were due to open in May, however I think in spite of this, we had a wonderful time. So to start off we went to Parc Asterix. I think of this is a very under-rated place. The rides are fun, enjoyable, interestingly themed and very re-rideable. The obvious highlight is Oz'Iris which, five years after my first ride is still an incredible ride. We managed a back row and front row ride and each was enjoyable. It managed to toe the line between modern and old school B&M and the custom layout works really well with the nearby theming.

Tonnerre de Zeus has had some queue line work too but seemed rougher then I remember, presumably its starting to age and might need a little bit of work done. I was impressed with the parks newer additions such as the disk which features fire effects and the way the ride is designed into the lake. I love Goudurix. This may be controversial but it's an intense, raw experience which many newer rides could learn lessons from. Sure its still rated one of the worst rollercoasters in the world but I don't think it deserves the hatred it received.
 
Park 2 was Nigloland, a park celebrating its 30th anniversary. This park has a lot of Mack rides, in fact it almost comes across as a mini Europa Park. This was my biggest surprise of the trip frankly, it's a fantastic park that retains its family history and the obvious pride in the place is something you just don't get with company parks. The obvious star of Nigloland is Alpina-Blitz, an absolutely sublime rollercoaster and by a country mile my favourite ride of the trip. One of my favourite aspects of it is the little Mack touches, the way the ride has such forceful air time in the Blue Fire type trains, the little walkway that extends over the track in the station to allow disabled access, the way it borrows the best bits from Piraten (Djurs Sommerland) and improving on them massively. As I've got older, I don't re-ride rides more then 2/3 times but Alpina Blitz, we got ten rides out of. It is worth the trip to here alone.


Other rides in Nigloland aren't 'quite' up the standard of Blitz, but they don't need to be. Euro-Sat has a little brother here for example and whilst not quite as good or as long, is a nice surprise. The log flume, I found very strange. It runs about nine boats in total and contains only one drop in a very short layout. Strange. I loved the powered coaster, I forced the others to ride a further two times. A few rides there were a bit dodgy such as the Jungle Cruise rip off or the Jurassic Park walkthrough which were a waste of time really, but in the context of the park are good fillers. The new drop tower which sticks out like a saw thumb was pretty terrifying if only for the sheer size of the tower. The drop had nothing on our Detonator, however its height was intimidating.

 
Park 3 - Holiday Park
 
The original intention was to visit Walygator for Monster and Anaconda. However when that decided to open three weeks later, we quickly diverted to Holiday Park in Germany. It's been eleven years since I last visited and I originally didn't really like Expedition Ge Force finding it over-rated and disappointing. My opinion on this has morphed slightly, however I think EGF is now severely outclassed by Shambhala, Alpina Blitz and Piraten. The ride was running one train and because of intamin related problems, it took ages to load. The restraints bite hard into taller people meaning the air time hills become more and more painful as it goes on. I'm 6 foot and was on the edge of pain. It was more enjoyable then I remembered but there's just no way that the ride is number one.

 
The new star of Holiday Park is Sky Scream. I liked it a lot. I'd been on Superman at Discovery Kingdom and it is pretty much exactly the same albeit, the theme is very different. Horror theme just doesn't work on this kind of rollercoaster, especially in glorious sunshine. Holiday Park suffers from a lack of family rollercoasters. It has two thrill machines and then everything else is slightly below par. An average omni-mover, a pretty good rapids and a stupidly wet log flume don't really make up for the lack of family support rides. The drop tower being themed to a teenager tv show was odd.
 
Phantasialand
 
Everyone knows this park is awesome, that goes without saying. I love the Baron hour extra ride time for guests at the end of the day, I love the hotel, I adore how cheap the ride photos and food are at at the park. I hate Winjas. The news of a launched flyer is welcome news. Kind of glad it isn't B&M as well. 

Fantastic views of Mamba from the hotel room
 
Movie Park
 
This place is weird. You can tell that it's had a change in direction with one half of the park being movie themed and the rest rides just chucked at pathways. The highlight by far was Van Helsing which isn't just a good ride, is a stand out Gerstlauer wild mouse. Some really forceful hair pins and great dips in a ride that really showcases the best of the company. It's theme was pretty decent too, although admittedly the head peeking out of the ceiling on the exit platform was more comedic then scary. The rest of the park is pretty poor though. Star Trek was desperately needed but not ready to open on our visit. The Vekoma SLC was Dan's first of this type, well deserving of a front row seat. Wasn't that bad but after Oz'Iris and Black Mamba, it doesn't come across well. The only photo I have of the day is Oswald at Disneyland Paris so that will have to do.

 
And finally Efteling 
 
When I was younger and in my theme park teenage years, there were three parks that I always wanted to visit because they sounded more magical then theme parky. They were Liseberg, Tivoli Gardens and Efteling. And I was finally ticking this off my list. The park was busy and queues for the big rides topped an hour. My obvious interest was Baron 1898 which I'll talk about later. Firstly, Flying Dutchman. What a great concept let down solely by the middling rollercoaster bit. The theming of Efteling is second to none and the atmosphere of the indoor bit is fantastic. I was slightly thrown off by the lift hill where I thought an obvious backwards bit was going to happen but didn't. Next, Volga Rock a rather extravagant Vekoma rollercoaster which I really enjoyed. My memory is hazy because of the sheer oddness of the trip. The fairy dark ride is fabulous. I was taken back by the sheer scale of the ride, the attention to detail of the sets is incredible. The Venom Madhouse requires you to know Dutch and well, we don't. Music was great though. Joris en de Draak, the parks racing woodies were both running one trains and to be honest, I didn't think it had anything on Wodan. I don't get the appeal of racing coasters to be honest, the rides motions get completely ignored by wanting to see where the other train has gone. And I hate losing.

And finally, Baron. I thought this was a wonderful take on the dive machine concept. I like my rides to involve the people passing by so the little bell emanating from the lift hill when a train is about to descend is the kind of detail I love to see. The show rooms on this don't rely on a knowledge on the Dutch language enabling anyone to understand the story. The drop is rather nifty and whilst shorter then Oblivion has a similar impact. The zero g is good.The air time hill is terrible. There isn't a single bit of sensation as the train rises and falls over the track and fills like its there to increase ride length only. The ride also has a problem with capacity. It only has three trains and even with that there is massive stacking. Oblivion with its seven trains (in its heyday anyway) runs rings around Baron. In spite of this, 1898 is thematically far more interesting and engaging then Oblivion. The power of dive machines to grab attention is second to none. 

 
And with that the trip was over. Some of the top parks in Europe are only a couple of hours away from the UK so there really is no excuse not to go.
 
Next up was Thorpe Park which was absolutely dead. Where was everyone? This was my first time on Derren Brown and I have to say it was relatively enjoyable. It suffers from the Merlin problem that acting = shouting at guests and ordering them around. I loved the train concept and even fell for the bit where a tube train is thundering down the tunnel. We were lucky that there was no queue and we got batched in straight away. It's not worth a long queue but it is interesting that the ride length of Derren Brown is probably longer then every other ride at Thorpe put together.
This is Samurai which I haven't ridden for about three years.
 
Next up was Disneyland Paris where we were by chance around for the reopening of Space Mountain as the shameless cash in, Hyperspace Mountain. I didn't like this one bit and the main problem is the clashing of themes. Star Wars on the Californian version is fine, that has a rather charmless theme as it is. The Jules Verne mixed with X-Wings and Death Stars doesn't work at all. Sadly this ride will be a lot more popular with visitors, equalling longer queues, meaning the original version from 1995, may now never return. On the plus side, the new trains are excellent albeit, slightly more restrictive then the old ones.

 
Other new features for the 25th include a new parade (which was a massive upgrade from the old one), a new firework show (which is a massive downgrade from Dreams) and new day time shows celebrating the magic of DLP.

I forgot to mention Europa Park, but lets face it that place is just insanely incredible. It was the quietest I've ever seen it with being able to stay on Blue Fire three times in a row or walk on front row Wodan. New area Ireland is fine, the rather odd choice of theming a rockin' tug around a Titanic life boat is an interesting choice for a ride..
 

 
Blue Fire remains as incredible as always, surely one of the best rides ever built. It's on its 9th season but you couldn't tell it as it has not aged one iota. The drops with that level of smoothness make it one of the most consistent rides out there.
 
I apologise for this blogs length and well done if you even got half way. It's been a breezy six months and I'm so glad that my passion for theme parks have been reinvigorated. Nothing is like our hobby, the sheer escapism and joy from theme parks is unrivalled. And to end this length trip report, here's Scenic Railway at Margate which gave me chills.
 

It's been a while since I dedicated a whole blog post to a ride review, but this seems like a suitable time to do one.
 
WARNING:  There will spoilers.  If you don't know what the ride system is, or want to completely avoid knowing what some of the effects used in the ride are, turn back now.
 
 
 
For those completely unaware, it is a 3D-screen based shooter ride, where you use hand motion to 'fire'.  Sitting in rows of four, with your 3D glasses, a lap bar comes down with a motion sensor.  In the queue line, a short (and badly presented!) video explains you must swipe your arm forward to fire, keeping it at least 8 inches above the sensor, and to aim high, point your hand / arm higher.  Vague, but simple enough I suppose.
 
The ride passes a variety of screens, some you stop at, some you don't, along with the odd bit of physical theming.  There is also some real theming in front of the screens that the animations did interact with which was awesome.  There was also a few special effect, include heat blasts, mist, wind and flashing lights (which cleverly disguises the ORP), all matching up with what's happening on screen.
 
During the first scene, you quickly realise that the fire and aim idea isn't very simple.  It is difficult to really know where you ball of energy that you're firing is going to land.  So you just have to resort to the 'fire as many times as physically possible' tactic, hoping for the best.  Towards the end of the ride, I got the hang of it a bit more, but that is a bit too late in the ride.  It's a shame that there isn't a more involved / detailed explanation in the queue line as to how the system works, as it does take a while for most to adjust to it - and judging from the low scores from families, it does seem to be a difficult one for many to grasp.  
 
There is a vague story to the ride, but it's difficult to follow.  You start off in training, before having to take down various bad guys, which leads to the big finale of the defeating the Great Devourer; a giant snake.  But things happen so quickly that it's easy to get lost.  You also battle alongside different ninjas during the ride, all of whom have their own special power.  When they appear, you hear them say 'Use *insert their power there*', and I must admit I was confused as to whether I should be making different hand movements or if this was generic talk.  However, the ride is very fast-paced, and it doesn't really need a story beyond 'Beat the bad guys', so it works well.
 
After coming off, I was left surprised.  Most shooter rides I'm just keen to find out if I've got the best score, but this left with a big smile on my face, and actually wanting to talk about the ride itself.  It was a great ride, and I wanted to talk to others about how the cars moved, about the special effects, about what happened in terms of the story.  The score wasn't the forefront of my mind.  And the only other shooter to leave me feeling like that was Maus au Chocolat at Phantasialand.  
 
And, I was also keen to do it again, so I could experience the ride again.  Not just so I could compete with people again, but so I could experience the fast-paced, crazy middle section, so I could get more interaction with the heat and wind effects.  So I could experience the ride again, and not just some game.
 
After a second time, I did understand things a bit more.  The hand motion system was easier to use (though I ended up with a worse score...somehow).  The story made more sense (when a different ninja with a different power appears, the shape of the balls you fire changes for example).  Things seemed much clearer.  And again, I loved the ride, not just the competitive element.
 
Ninjago really is a great investment for Windsor.  It feels very different to the rest of the park (in a good way), has a great throughput (full queue only takes about an hour!), themed uniforms, and offers something for the older end of the target market (and the adults!).  It's something that has major re-ride value, and feels like something which would only improve as you ride it more (since things make more sense / are easier to use).  

Parks in the UK have been subject to much scrutiny over the past couple of years.  In fairness, a lot of the scrutiny and negativity that the parks receive is justified; there are things which do happen which shouldn't happen.  And when we compare to our European cousins or American brothers, it does seem like UK parks aren't up to scratch.  But at the same time, there is an awful lot of nitpicking that goes on at times.  
 
However, despite this overwhelming negativity, a large majority of us continue to visit our home parks multiple times year-in-year-out.  Why that is will no doubt vary for every person.  But one thing is almost certain - if we're visiting so often, they've got to be doing something right, surely?  
 
So if you end up making multiple visits to a park this year, maybe even finding yourself in a rut, set yourself a little challenge:  Try and notice some new-to-you positive each time you visit.  I'm not saying this positive has to be a new thing the park have done, like painting or fixing something (though it can be!), but just a new thing you've personally noticed.  Maybe you hear a piece of audio you never noticed before, see a subtle piece of theming tucked away, try something new to eat, some new foliage that's been planted.  It could be the tiniest of things.  But just try and notice something.  
 
Then maybe, just maybe, you might find yourself enjoying the parks a bit more.  You might realise that everything isn't as bad as you originally thought.  You might remember what it was like to visit for the first time, and just how awesome some things are.  And then you won't be blindly visiting the same park over and over again, but actually visiting because you want to go, want to explore and want to immerse yourself.  And that might give the extra incentive to visit a new park, go exploring, go on an adventure, to truly recapture that buzz.   
 
Of course, don't overlook the negatives.  Don't be afraid to think 'This is naff' or 'Why have that changed this?' as well.  Not everything is going to be perfect.  Just don't forget to look out for the positives too, and if you really can't find any, then maybe you've finished exploring that park, and you truly have to wonder why you're visiting at all.  

I know it’s been a silly amount of time since I started this, let's wrap it up. The wait has been because sadly my old laptop has died, taking my photos with it until I work out how to rescue them, so shiny new laptop is good for me and means I can finally write this, but a text only end to this is less good for you, dear reader...
 
My only other experience of a Mack spinner is Sierra Sidewinder at Knotts, which is such a pathetic sucky excuse for coaster I wasn't expecting anything from Euro Mir, but it's ace! The lifthill of forever gives some good fun rave times, the first half of the coaster section with the slow spinning I found strangely unnerving because of the height and feeling of hanging over the edge of the track, and the second half so unexpectedly intense it shocked me. I love spinners in general, and this is one of the best. 9/10.
 
The other big old coaster I was less of a fan of, it's just so uncomfortable in there. Euro Sat I can only assume is themed to replicate the inside of an oven, the slow climb steadily reaching into hotter and hotter air until just when I thought I could take it no more it slams you through its manoeuvres relentlessly until it smashes to an end on brakes, which feel like a lump of concrete has been left on the tracks. I don't know at what temperature steel melts, but I was fully expecting the track to fold away from underneath me like plasticine at any moment. I can appreciate the craziness, but it's just a little too chaotic for me. 7/10
 
Then we come to the two newest coasters at the back of the park in Blue Fire and Woodan, and they both blew me away. Woodan is rough enough to know it's wood, smooth enough to be enjoyable for everyone. It flies though the course throwing little nuggets of airtime at you over and over, doing nothing too extreme to offend, but never being dull for a moment. It is perfectly executed from the first step into the queueline until it slides back into the station. Except maybe that adverse camber turn into the lifthill - that freaked me the hell out. Blue Fire I'd probably rate as the best in the park. My first Mack launch, and they clearly should be everywhere. The launch smooth and powerful with the train seeming to crackle down the track and the layout fantastic; probably the best series of inversions on any coaster anywhere, especially the last one where the train seems to disappear from beneath you mid inversion. And it's all made so enjoyable by the comfort and freedom of the restraints. Both a solid 10/10.
 
The place is so huge I could write for pages and pages (I know, I already have!), even on just the outstanding bits, which are many. But I won’t, so just to cover a few bits which stand out in my memory…
- Arthur (or '**** ***** *****, the ride' as we called it owing to the slightly lively lyrics for a children's ride) is an odd one. We really enjoyed it and the theming is well done, but as an advert for the ride from Mack it seems to be a bit of a shocker with loads of downtime, seats out of action all over the place and a locker room of faff which just does not work. The queue was always slow, long, hot and tiresome, which obviously stands out a mile in a park so obsessed with efficiency. It’s decent enough when you’re on it though. They’ve also taken the two best kiddie rides from Holiday Park with the drop towers and bouncy roundabout thing, which is a nice support selection.
- Pirates of Somewhere other than the Caribbean was a blast, really well done, and the second visit to the Wicked Witches clamshells of my youth were vastly superior to the previous encounter on this trip, even if a hanging is a bit strong! Other than that though I think the other dark rides slightly let the park down, with the already mentioned Cassandra, the dinosaur ride being dull and tired, the shooter very forgettable, and the Bench Christmas thing sitting uncomfortably close to embarrassing even if it does just about manage a little hint of charming.
- You can really see and feel the quality in the upkeep and theming of Europa on rides with direct UK comparisons; the teacups glide fast and effortlessly, the pirate ship looks like it was built yesterday, the seastorm boats in a room of effects. It’s all like new.
 
- The rest of everything is pretty much all fantastic; I'm particularly fond of a bobsled and this ones great, the logflume/coaster diamond mine interaction, unexpected things to stumble upon like the crown jewels thing, the food being so authentic to the areas, food loop, beer everywhere, stunning extravagant shows, happy enthusiastic staff, wonderful hotel facilities open to all. I could go on for ever more.

 
Everyone said 2 days wouldn't be enough. They were right. I'm not sure two weeks would be enough, I don't think I could ever get enough. Nowhere is without its faults, but Europa has instantly become my favorite theme park in the world. I feel like I've visited at the right time too; the two newest coasters really round off a hell of a collection, and unfortunately I'm not particularly interested in project V. So for now I've had my fix. As we sat with our cocktails under the dancing fountains of Bell Rock on our last night we decided that we most certainly will be back...
 

 
 
TLDR - The message is Go to Europa Park!
 
 
 

Parks in the UK have been subject to much scrutiny over the past couple of years.  In fairness, a lot of the scrutiny and negativity that the parks receive is justified; there are things which do happen which shouldn't happen.  And when we compare to our European cousins or American brothers, it does seem like UK parks aren't up to scratch.  But at the same time, there is an awful lot of nitpicking that goes on at times.  
 
However, despite this overwhelming negativity, a large majority of us continue to visit our home parks multiple times year-in-year-out.  Why that is will no doubt vary for every person.  But one thing is almost certain - if we're visiting so often, they've got to be doing something right, surely?  
 
So if you end up making multiple visits to a park this year, maybe even finding yourself in a rut, set yourself a little challenge:  Try and notice some new-to-you positive each time you visit.  I'm not saying this positive has to be a new thing the park have done, like painting or fixing something (though it can be!), but just a new thing you've personally noticed.  Maybe you hear a piece of audio you never noticed before, see a subtle piece of theming tucked away, try something new to eat, some new foliage that's been planted.  It could be the tiniest of things.  But just try and notice something.  
 
Then maybe, just maybe, you might find yourself enjoying the parks a bit more.  You might realise that everything isn't as bad as you originally thought.  You might remember what it was like to visit for the first time, and just how awesome some things are.  And then you won't be blindly visiting the same park over and over again, but actually visiting because you want to go, want to explore and want to immerse yourself.  And that might give the extra incentive to visit a new park, go exploring, go on an adventure, to truly recapture that buzz.   
 
Of course, don't overlook the negatives.  Don't be afraid to think 'This is naff' or 'Why have that changed this?' as well.  Not everything is going to be perfect.  Just don't forget to look out for the positives too, and if you really can't find any, then maybe you've finished exploring that park, and you truly have to wonder why you're visiting at all.  

Canadian Caper
 
As you'll have read in Part 1, my Canadian Caper involved a fairly crazy 2 days visiting 4 Theme Parks across the Canadian-US border in September, thanks to some ludicrously cheap flights from British Airways. And as Day 1 was fully taken up by the huge Canada's Wonderland with its 16 coasters, that left 3 Parks to cover on the 2nd day. With over 200km of driving to cover and a border crossing, the odds of me actually completing the planned itinerary weren't great - but Lady Luck was thankfully on my side.
 
Read on for Part 2 of my Canadian Caper!
 

 
Marineland
 

 
So first to Marineland, a (you guessed it) marine-based Park just one mile away from the Falls at Niagara. The place has had more than it's fair share of controversy, with its 81-year-old owner John Holer appearing in the press for animal-abuse allegations with depressing regularity over the years. If you thought that SeaWorld looked bad after 2013's Blackfish, you ain't seen nothing yet. VICE have recently published an informative guide to the Park entitled: "Marineland is a Hellhole". Only last month, the Ontario Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals charged Marineland with five counts of animal cruelty, with further charges pending.
 
In yet another example, in 2011 SeaWorld won a court battle against Marineland surrounding the return of Ikaika the Killer Whale (Tillikum's son). Ikaika was on loan to Marineland from SeaWorld but SeaWorld sought to bring the animal back under its care, citing concerns about deteriorating conditions at the Park. Marineland lost, appealed, and lost again. If SeaWorld - which (fairly or not) has been very publicly criticised for its animal welfare record - is claiming that standards aren't high enough, you have to worry there's a problem...
 
 
These stories are undoubtedly absolutely shocking, but ultimately weren't enough to prevent my curiosity from getting the better of me, so I nonetheless duly handed over my cash at the entrance gates...
 

 
...and once inside, it's clear that Marineland is quite unique.
 
For starters, it's vast. Built for Disney World crowds, but in reality attracting Gulliver's World crowds... when I arrived at Park opening at 10am, the place was deserted. It has a very "rural" feel about it; essentially being over 1,000 acres of woodland peppered with fish tanks and amusement rides. Getting anywhere takes an age.
 
And what looks like it should be a service road is in fact the main guest thoroughfare in the Park. Look at it!
 

 
Unsurprisingly, the Park's headline attraction, Dragon Mountain, is quite a trek away - over 1.2km walking distance from the Park entrance.
 
Nestled deep in the woods, initial impressions however are that the hike is worth it, with the ride sporting a fabulous dragon-themed entrance.
 

 
And the rockwork and themeing continues throughout the queueline, which due to verging on the pitch black fostered quite an eery atmosphere - especially given there was no-one else around.
 
My trusty camera (the excellent Sony HX90V) even struggled to get a good shot of the station, below, which had a little more light in it - and, thankfully, another guest.
 

 
Dragon Mountain is, by most metrics, an unusual coaster. Conceived by Arrow's Ron Toomer, it was the tallest roller coaster in the world at the time of construction in 1983 (186ft), and at 5,500ft long, it's covers 30 acres of Marineland woodland; 90% of the track is hidden from guests before riding.
 
Ascending the lift hill for the first time, I really had no idea what lay ahead - which can't often be said for a large outdoor coaster!
 

 
The three and a half minute ride is a lot of fun, although not without a few painful moments along the way.
 
The trains are old-fashioned Arrow and don't allow for a huge amount of movement. The track doesn't handle transitions especially smoothly. But the ride does have a host of surprises up its sleeve, including two consecutive vertical loops, a large downwards helix inside a half-built volcano structure, two dives into tunnel sections (more tunnel than any other coaster in the world), and still the world's only bowtie element, the exit of which is shown below!
 
Oh, and a lot of completely straight track. So much straight track.
 

 
After a few rides on the Mountain, I strolled back over to the left hand side of the Park to take in the only other coaster, Lady Bug Coaster. Set in a charming kids area that also features a Zierer Kontiki (Viking Adventure), Zierer Ferris Wheel (Tivoli Wheel), and Zierer Flying Fish (Ocean Odyssey), Lady Bug is a simple Zierer Tivoli with manual brakes and had a longer queue than I ever saw for Dragon Mountain.
 

 
Having gone full circle back to the Park's entrance - and with energy levels already waning - I grabbed a very greasy chicken strips and chips meal from the Park's only restaurant and settled down to watch the King Waldorf Stadium Show.
 
This is essentially Shamu-lite, and I thought was pretty well done, with a variety of animals featured including beluga whales, dolphins, and a humongous walrus at the end.
 
The show aimed to put one half of the audience (red team) in competition with the other (blue team) via a variety of marine displays and tricks, but it didn't get the crowd (which had reached a respectable volume - I suspect the entire Park was there) especially excited. The speaker volume was also down very low, although I couldn't tell whether this was out of respect for the animals or whether it was simply a bit broken...
 

 
And last but not least, opening only at 12pm (cost saving?), the Park's most recognisable attraction by far is its S&S Combo Tower, Sky Screamer. This thing is huge, and looks even bigger because it is perched on top of a hill right at the centre of the Park (it's a 300m, 10 minute upward struggle to even get to the ride entrance from the base of the hill - painful in the now-midday sun).
 
The advertising of Sky Screamer as "the world's highest triple tower ride" is somewhat misleading. It is not the world's tallest triple tower ride - the tower itself is tall (100m), but 15m shorter than Madrid's S&S triple tower Venganza del Enigma (115m). What gives Marineland's tower the "highest" claim is the fact it's sat on that 46m hill; it's high by virtue of its location, not because it has the longest drop.
 
But I digress. It's still bloody big.
 

 
And that 450m total height is certainly put to good use, affording quite spectacular views over Niagara Falls itself from the top. Simply breathtaking, and pleasingly the ride itself is a typically thrilling S&S affair to boot (although still pales a little in comparison to the superlative Fabbri Megadrop IMO...).
 
In fact, I'd go as far to say that Sky Screamer is the best-located drop tower anywhere in the world, although Big Shot on top of the 921-foot Stratosphere Tower in Las Vegas might have something to say about that... are there any other contenders?
 

 
So, Marineland - never far from controversy, and a pretty strange place to spend a few hours.
 
Its few rides, marine exhibits, and stadium are spread out over such a huge area that it makes a day there more effort than it should be; it desperately needs some form of Park-wide transportation system, and that walk up to Sky Screamer isn't fun for anyone - an escalator in the same vein as Liseberg's would do wonders. It also in general just needs more, especially for an entry price that's within range of Wonderland's.
 
But it does have some gems - Dragon Mountain and Sky Screamer make the visit worthwhile, and the Stadium show was well presented. I just hope that the stars of said show are properly looked after behind the scenes...
 
Martin's Fantasy Island
 

 
It was now nearly 1pm, and I'd taken longer at Marineland than originally planned (the 12pm opening of Sky Screamer being much to blame). Part of me considered skipping Martin's Fantasy Island, given that I'd heard of its reputation as just a glorified fairground, and the more-alluring Darien Lake was still over an hour's drive away, including a border crossing into the USA at Niagara.
 
An even larger part of me considered skipping it following an agonisingly long wait at said border, having been ordered into the Port of Entry building for further checks because my story ("I was last in the USA in June") didn't align with the US Customs and Border Protection computer systems, which had no record of this visit. Sigh.
 
All of this meant that I didn't reach Martin's until 2:30pm. But I'm very glad I kept it in the itinerary.
 

 
The Park is, essentially, a glorified fairground, albeit a well presented one. Everything was clean and tidy, and the setting around a small lake is really quite nice.
 
Martin's is a classic slice of Americana, with the place clearly targeting local families with a no-frills, great value day out. The place feels very rural and low-key; the closest Park in the UK in my opinion would be Oakwood.
 
Everything here is pretty standard - there's a Star Flyer, a Disko, a Gravitron, and a Teacups, all presented without a great deal of themeing, and mostly un-shaded tarmac connecting it all together. Excellent.
 
On the coaster front there's three to enjoy, starting with a standard Zamperla spinning Wild Mouse; Crazy Mouse.
 

 
Number two is a standard Wacky Worm from SBF Visa; Max's Doggy Dog Coaster.
 

 
And last but certainly not least is the very non-standard CCI Woodie, Silver Comet.
 
The ride, standing at the back of the Park, is the more unusual hybrid type with grey steel supports. Its stats suggest a perfectly average ride; 82ft height, 55mph top speed, 50° drop, 1:45 ride time.
 
Some CCIs impress: Megafobia, Raven, Tonnerre du Zeus. Some don't: Stampida.
 

 
Silver Comet definitely impressed, and is a brilliant example of how a ride doesn't have to break any records to be a thoroughly worthwhile attraction.
 
The layout is very peppy, never dull, and the above-average maintenance work over the years means a very smooth ride. Hugely re-rideable, and with good pops of airtime across the layout, a whole lot of fun.
 

 
This alone is the reason to come to Martin's Fantasy Island. It might look like an off-the-shelf model from Roller Coaster Tycoon, but its varied, compact layout is an absolute winner. Silver Comet is of the best large family attractions (with just a 1.2m height restriction) I've ridden in a long while. It'd fit into a Chessington or a Drayton wonderfully.
 
The only fly in the ointment is the operations on the ride. Mirroring much of the rest of the Park, loading and dispatch times on Silver Comet were painful. Having been assigned a row, riders get on the train and are told over the tannoy to do up seat belts only. 2 members of staff then start from the front of the train and check individual seat belts down the platform. Then the lap bars are unlocked, and riders are again loudly told to keep arms up: "do not touch the lap bars, we will put them down for you!" The 2 members of staff then go down the train again, lowering the lap bar. If any rider touches a lap bar, the process starts over.
 
Very tedious, and only serves to deter guests from marathoning an otherwise excellent coaster!
 

 
After 3 rides on the Comet, my watch (3:30pm) told me it was really time to move on.
 
I grabbed an obligatory (yet reasonably priced) Hot Dog and Pepsi, and made a beeline for the exit.
 

 
2016 is the last season that the Park will be operating under the Martin's moniker - local businessman Martin DiPietro, the owner since 1994, sold the Park earlier this year to Apex Parks Group who own small Parks, Waterparks and FECs across the US. This seems a good fit, and if the new owners keep the same solid standards and bring some new investment in the place, this would be no bad thing.
 
Commenting on the sale, Al Weber Jr, Apex CEO, said: “It’s a nice park, in nice condition, in a great market. We like that it’s family focused.”
 
I couldn't agree more.
 
Darien Lake
 

 
40 miles away from Martin's Fantasy Island is Darien Lake, arguably the premier Park in the state of New York, and a former Six Flags property (1999 - 2006).
 
The place certainly makes an immediate impression on you with the towering 208ft Ride of Steel lining the entrance to the Park.
 
Little generates anticipation and excitement for a day out at a Theme Park better than a large red and blue hyper... more on this later.
 

 
At this point it had just turned 4:00pm, giving me 6 hours to get everything in before Park close, and the commencement of the daily show Ignite the Night.
 
The place was busy - it was a glorious Sunday afternoon - meaning that the task ahead was challenging, but not impossible. I grabbed my admissions ticket, stopping briefly to admire the attractive entrance plaza, and headed on in.
 

 
First up was Mind Eraser; an apt name for a ride that tries its level best to do your head in.
 
This was typical Vekoma SLC fare, made worse by having only one train in operation (the other train was in pieces to the side of the brake run).
 
On the plus side, at least it looks pretty on the lake.
 

 
Continuing the theme of ubiquitous Dutch pain-machines was Boomerang, a Vekoma, erm, Boomerang. At the time of writing, there are 34 operating Vekoma Boomerangs in the world; 16 of which are called Boomerang. This one tries to add a touch of originality by adding a suffix: Coast to Coaster. I'm not sure what exactly this means.
 
Regardless, this was one of the smoother Boomerangs I've ridden, and was well presented in attractive colours akin to our those of our own Colossus.
 

 
The Park's only Woodie comes in the form of Predator, a relatively rare Dinn Corporation ride from the same stable as the relatively rough Mean Streak at Cedar Point, relatively rough Timber Wolf at Worlds of Fun and relatively rough Thunder Run at Kentucky Kingdom.
 
Predator was, predictably, relatively rough. Actually, towards the back of the train where I was sitting, it verged on being extremely rough, which did nothing to add to its unmemorable layout. Zero to headache in 110 seconds.
 
Rarely do I come off a ride and tell myself I'm never doing it again. Predator was one of those times.
 

 
Unfortunately, the Park's 1982 Arrow Looper Viper did little to help ease the headache.
 
With both track and supports painted completely in black (is this a Merlin property?), and an extensive layout with 5 inversions, the ride certainly looks intense from the ground. Alas getting on board proved to be as slow as the SLC; the ride was similarly running only one train, and the station was a complete free-for-all, with no orderly queuing taking place whatsoever.
 
And whilst the ride was long and varied, the experience wasn't especially comfortable. On reflection I'd have taken another ride on Marineland's Dragon Mountain over another ride on Viper, Marineland's ride having opened just a year after Darien's.
 

 
Yet another long queue greeted me at the Park's newest coaster, Moto Coaster, although at this stage I was very nearly grateful that it would give my head a bit of a rest.
 
Thanks to the fairly appalling throughput on the 12-person trains, I had ample time to grab a drink and catch my breath - good news. The bad news was that this 2008 ride has literally been plonked down on a slab of concrete, with a queue line completely absent of foliage or shade. Even into the early evening, the sun was strong... and so the headache continued.
 
I'd been wanting to ride one of these for a while, but with the closest of the 10 operating models being in Särkänniemi, Finland, they'd evaded me thus far. So how was the ride? Not half bad, actually, although the limitations of the compact layout meant that the trains never gained any pace (a max speed of 40mph). The flywheel launch was a bit of a non-event as it lacked acceleration, but the twists and turns of the track were smoothly navigated, and the riding position was comfortable.
 
One of Zamperla's better creations, but still unfortunately inferior to Vekoma's bigger, faster, more substantial product.
 

 
The sun was starting to go down, so I checked out what else the Park had to offer whilst it was still light.
 
There's a HUSS Top Spin, Twister, although this was closed for maintenance on the day of my visit. The most recent thrill addition (in 2015) is a 22m Larson Loop by the name of Rolling Thunder, although I didn't go on this having enjoyed / endured the Loop at Six Flags St Louis, Fireball, earlier in the year.
 
Being fond of drop towers, I did have a go on the S&S-built Blast Off, a respectable 185ft effort that was garnering long queues. Pleasingly the lengthy wait was vindicated by some spectacular views over the Park.
 
There's also a moderately sized (60ft) Arrow Log Flume, Thunder Rapids, and a moderately sized (50ft) Intamin Shoot the Chutes, Shipwreck Falls. An decent length Intamin River Rapids, Grizzly Run, completes the solid water-ride lineup.
 
I even found time to enjoy American Rock, a jukebox show playing three times daily in the Grand Theatre. The venue couldn't have held more than a few hundred, but the show (with a cast of six) is professionally staged and performed; the audience seemed to lap it up.
 
The most unusual thing however is a baseball batting cage up-charge attraction that I'd not seen at a Theme Park before, allowing guests to pay for a few minutes of practice in a safely netted-off area. There were four pitches, and the speed at which the balls were being fired out of the machines increased as players went from left to right.
 
The kid below was hitting from the slowest firing machine... and let's just say it was still pretty fast!
 

 
Night was beginning to fall, and the only attraction left on the hit list was Ride of Steel. With an hour or two still to go before Park close, what better way than to spend the time getting as many rides in as possible...?
 
Unfortunately doing this was - as with the SLC and the Arrow Looper - a largely painful experience, due to slow loading and the disorganised melee in the station. Being a single rider, I did a lot of "making friends" with potential other single riders closer to the air gates to try to fill empty seats and get maximum rides in!
 
The ride itself is absolutely superb; easily for me on a par with similar Intamin creations such as Expedition GeForce at Holiday Park and Goliath at Walibi. Comfortable lap bar restraints and a long, airtime-filled ride; Ride of Steel benefits from a kick-ass first drop, colossal wide sweeping helices, and ejector-tastic bunny hops just before the brake run. It's a huge amount of fun; more rough and ready than an equivalent B&M, but more intense too.
 

 
One of the defining memories of the trip for me is sitting on Ride of Steel for the n-th time, climbing the lift hill in the warm breeze as the sun had just dropped below the horizon, and looking out over the beautiful lit up Park. Magic.
 
It's a real shame that there aren't more of these in the world; there are only 6 Intamin Hypers and 2 Intamin Gigas. Which is why it's really really good that Energylandia has bought the first new installation for 15 years. Set to open in 2018, the ride looks set to take the "fastest non-launched coaster in Europe" title with a max speed of 87mph, and even features a splashdown.
 
Having visited earlier this year, Energylandia is a really promising Park, and this on paper looks fantastic... colour me excited.
 

 
Following one final ride on Ride of Steel, I walked over to the grassy area by the Park's lake and took my place for the 10pm performance of Ignite the Night.
 
I have to be honest, I wasn't expecting anything especially impressive from this, a nightly show from a regional Theme Park, albeit the biggest one in the state (Darien's visitor numbers won't be topping much more than 1m; around half of what Alton Towers might achieve).
 
But it was absolutely fantastic. It blew me away. Darien's marketing is pretty accurate when it claims: "Music, Water, Fire, Video, and Pyrotechnics all come together for this laser light spectacular in the air, on the stage and all around." Lasers images are projected onto a central screen, whilst a myriad other lasers point out towards the crowd. This, plus the water and fire effects, are all synchronised to a booming soundtrack, which covered a wide variety of genres (everything from I'm Too Sexy to Wonderful World).
 
Clocking in at 25 minutes, audiences are certainly given value for money; there are many highlights, but Pitbull's Fireball, complete with liberal bursts of fire, certainly got the crowd going. You can get a quick flavour for the show from Darien's promo video here.
 
The show finishes with a genuinely patriotic and rousing rendition of Lee Greenwood's God Bless The USA, which didn't leave many dry eyes in the house. Superb.
 
Darien Lake seriously punches above its weight with it's nightly show, and it alone makes a visit to the Park worthwhile. Kudos to everyone involved. Why can't our Parks find the budgets to do this...?
 

 
And that brings Day 2 of my Canadian Caper to a close!
 
This is probably the longest trip report I've ever written, which reflects just how much I packed into this one day. Pleasingly, nothing spited me, I got everything I wanted to done, and had some really great new experiences; Marineland's Drop Tower, Martin's Woodie, and Darien's Hyper all spring to mind, alongside of course Ignite the Night.
 
I left the Darien Lake car park at around 10:45pm, thoroughly exhausted, but very content. There is a huge amount to see and do around Toronto - for the general tourist let alone the Theme Park enthusiast - and a fly-and-drive visit here comes highly recommended.
 
~
 
Thanks for reading! Comments very welcome below.
 
Liked this? More musings from my travels in recent years:
 
Vietnam Dubai Italy Germany

Italy
 
With the exception of Gardaland, Italy is a relative unknown in the rollercoaster world. Despite the country containing two of the best rollercoasters in Europe, its relative distance from the UK and distance between parks always means Italy is a difficult nut to crack. Baring in mind, I last did a theme park road trip there in 2011 and the developments that have occurred in the last five years, there is now, no reason not to visit this fantastic country.
 
We started in Rome, back when Rainbow Magicland was a brand new theme park. Since then Cincecittá World has opened which you can explore in Ben C's Italy blog from 2015
http://forum.maniahub.com/blogs/entry/714-roman-roaming-highlights-from-italy-part-1/
 
Rainbow Magicland
 
This odd little park is a definite unknown. Despite the big promises and high expectations from when it initially opened, the park has never really set the continent alight. It has the space and some very intriguing attractions but it's never been able to grow beyond that. About an hour from Rome itself, it's one I would visit again thanks to Shock and Huntik.
 
Shock for example is a good ride to demonstrate the almost amateur approach of the park. It begins with very odd meandering before launching you off to the sky with some great aerial movements. It's loud, it's fast, its relatively intense, its photogenic and it leaves its best trick till last.

 
Whilst Shock is the parks signature ride, it's pretty much the only rollercoaster that genuinely impresses. The parks spinner is pretty terrible for example, a ride in a giant shed and suffers from the same problems that Winjas and Spinball suffer from; the turns counteract the spinning momentum meaning the ride never really gets going. Luckily the theming is fantastic so at least when walking past the ride, there is something to admire.

 
The surprise stand out was without a shadow of a doubt Huntik, a next generation shoot em up with fantastic effects. We really enjoyed.

I'd recommend a visit here to start a trip off with. 
 
Miribilandia
 
I really like Miribilandia. That is off course help by Katun which is undoubtedly my favourite B&M worldwide. The height of the thing, the fantastic intensity and the traditional B&M layout combination really works here and the ride whilst feels controlled (unlike say... enthusiast favourite Nemesis), it rides so well that can be forgiven for anything. I love it.
 

 

 
Next up, comes I-Speed a well loved Intamin launch rollercoaster. It's a good ride, solid, well paced and keeps its speed throughout. The only issue is those damn restraints which tend to cut into you on the fast corners. If it was able to get the new restraints, it would definitely fly up the rankings.

 

 
I have yet to ride Divertical but I've heard 'some' good things. The final real quality ride there is Reset, a dark ride themed to.. well I'll let the pictures do the talking. Worth riding and very separate from the rest of the park.
 

 

 
And finally, after driving across Italy, we come to Gardaland, at a time when people did generally seem to like Merlin. With Raptor, Krake and The Swarm all built in quick succession, it's amazing how Merlin haven't quite reached that lofty standard for a while. I really like Raptor, I personally think that despite it not really featuring large drops and big inversions, it has a much more original layout, more well paced then any of the others and I really love its industrial look.
 

 

 
Since my visit Oblivion: Black Hole has opened so another reason to visit Italy for you all. In terms of when I when I went, Raptor was only really the major ride that shone. Other rides like the awful S&S attraction, so awful I've forgotten its name and the Venom twosome aren't great back up coasters frankly.
 

 

 
Other rides really are terrible though, the Atlantis ride is tedious in the extreme. It looks pretty but no, not any good. The park does also suffer from similar Merlin issues to ours such as up-selling and very few support rides.
 
Finally...
 
Just a shout out to Italy as a country. It's a fantastic place and my absolute favourite theme park trip memory is sitting on a balcony in our apartment overlooking the sun setting, with a couple of beers and just enjoying everything about the country. It's lovely and definitely worth a visit over. 
 
Thanks for the reading and for Part 3, I shall be attacking the big egg that is Germany.. wish me luck.