CharlieN

Unless you’ve been living under on a distant island  or on a galaxy far away,  you will be fully aware of the current  pandemic that is happening, causing for much concern and cancellation of next to everything fun, social or entertainment related.
  Whilst there are definitely bigger concerns out there, we probably won’t get our park fixes again now for at least a little while. This is why I’ve pitched up the idea of 10 Theme Park related things you can do and enjoy in the comfort of your own home whilst waiting for all this to blow over. Feel free to post your own suggestions too.   1/ Theme Park Video/Computer Games
The first (and possibly most obvious) thing to do when the parks aren’t open. There are plenty of theme park games, from the obvious Roller Coaster Tycoon Games and  Planet Coaster, to the slightly more obscure Theme Park World and Roller Coaster Factory, and even the whacky (yet wonderful) Legoland  games. Whilst we wait for this to blow over, enjoy your own fictional parks, simulations and creations!   2/ Watching YouTube Videos 
Again, another straight forward option. YouTube is literally a library for theme park videos, let alone everything else. You can watch literally anything, from Theme Park Worldwide, Jack Silkstone, Pleasure Beach Experience and many many others. Not a fan of these  or vloggers altogether? Then why not watch a POV of your favourite/bucket list coaster or that charming dark ride from Efteling? I know it’s not the same as visiting in person, but in the right ambience it can do the trick!   3/ Listening to your favourite park soundtrack or Album  Theme Parks don’t just give us great attractions and experiences, but they also give us some great music and playlists. Whether Imascore  you adore or snore, there are  lots of soundtracks to listen to and cherish in the comfort of your living room or bedroom. Belt out that Europa Suite or Villa Volta music from your sound system. Or if you prefer listen to the popular music playlists that usually echo  through those  amusement park entrances. In your living room. Not Coronation street please!   4/ Theme Park (related) construction toys 
Theme Park toys and gadgets are becoming more common these days. You have Lego Rollercoasters, nano- park building kits and other crazy contraptions that are based off, or at least resemble theme park related items. Definitely worth a shot.   5/ Watching Film/TV shows with theme parks in 
You could say I am just repeating point 2 again, but I say no. The difference between those are that those films and tv series use the parks essentially as film sets fo centre around or the development of the plot line. Whether that be that underwhelming time the Lampoons visited Six Flags Magic Mountain, that time the Spykids saves the day in Knotts Berry Farm or that time Will embarrassed everyone in the Inbetweeners? It’s all there Indeed and lots to see and adds even more amusement (no pun intended) to compare the accuracies and inaccuracies to how these parks actually operated in real.    Silly me, how did I not even mention Final Destination? Ok there you go.     6/ Reminiscing Old Park Trips  This one won’t be for everyone, especially if it triggers  serious park withdrawal symptoms, but nonetheless may still be something worth doing. Whether you’ve been worldwide, around Europe or generally stuck to just the U.K. parks, there must be that trip, that place or that visit that literally stuck out for you and gave you ever lasting memories.  For me, it has to be that first trip to Disneyland Paris back in 2015. I had never been so excited upon visiting a park before and felt simply overjoyed with everything about that trip, from an entertaining park group to some simply hilarious and magical laugh out loud memories both within and outside the parks. Wow! Five years.   7/ Looking at your merch collection 
Again this won’t be for everyone, but for most, there is surely some item that you have, or at least were  collecting at one point. Maps, pin badges, mugs, clothes or even shot glasses. I know this seems like a long shot, but it is these items that help with those connections to the parks and remind of us those wonderful visits we had there and hopefully will again one day too. I’m generally a resin person.   8/ Books from parks and attractions 
The title alone is rather vague I admit, but there are lots of park books and even articles to read right now. From park guides, brochures, theme park biographies and picture books too. Many have informative content which really go down into the depths of how parks and attractions cane to be. John Wardley’s biography is a strong personal recommendation!   9/ Act It Out!   Ok, I’m probably scraping the barrel a bit here and I can see most of you already acting confused as you read this. But if you can’t get down to those memorable attractions, bring those memorable attractions to you. Act it out! Dress up or style as your favourite park characters. Why not re-enact the Hex pre-show or Symbolica’s storyline? Ok, I just got the idea from this video, but it’s still pretty fun eye?    10/ Interacting with park mates and communities  Last but not least, but the most important thing of all, stay connected with your theme park mates and communities. It may all seem awkward being separated from next fo everyone right now, but you can stay together through virtual context. Drop messages, video chats and other means. Talk about your favourite rides, debate whether Helix is better than Taron (no fighting please), but more importantly, stay happy and well entertained in this challenging time for everything theme park and non theme park related.   Thank you for reading if you survived to the end. We are all in this together!   

Finland had never exactly been on my radar; it was more somewhere that I thought "it'd be nice to go there one day", as opposed to a "I'll go there in a few years". Then, Taiga happened, and all of a sudden, my interest popped up dramatically. And so Linnanmäki happened this weekend. I looked at trying to combine the trip with other Finnish parks (like Power Park and Särkänniemi), but given how widespread they are, Finland being the 8th most expensive European country, and time being limited, I had to settle for just the one park.
 
The park was open 1pm-midnight, with it also being the first day of their Halloween event Iik!Week (weirdly, Finnish parks seem to do Halloween events in September, and it was very much a coincidence we ended up going to that too). On a Saturday like this, the park would normally be open 1-10pm, so still very good opening hours. The park is completely free to enter (not even a turnstile in sight), and a wristband for unlimited rides and attractions costs a slightly eye-watering €42. There's options to by 'tickets' for individual rides, priced at the even more eye-watering price of €9, or a 'bundle' of 6 tickets for...€42. Weird system but okay.
 
Taiga
I've covered most of my thoughts on Taiga here, but just to sum it up for completeness here too: Taiga is absolutely brilliant. It starts off the day well, and when it warms up, it's a relentless beast. Twists that throw you out of your seat, crazy airtime, ongoing speed. It's stunning. Just sheer brilliance, and POVs don't do the ride justice in any way.
 
The ride has okay operations, with staff asking every single person as they check bars if their pockets are empty and, if not, making them empty them. A small thing, but annoying.


 
Vuoristorata
Finnish for 'Roller Coaster', this is a wooden coaster that's been going since 1951, and is a traditional brakeman wooden, with the brakeman at the back of the train. Also is heavily inspired by Bakken's woodie apparently.
 
This is genuinely an utter joy. From the hilariously quick lift hill, to the fun drops and double downs and the pace it manages to keep, it's actually really fun. And at the front of the train, you get some VERY strong airtime. Between this and Taiga, it's a wonder I didn't end up with bruised thighs after this trip. We rode it 8 times during the day, which I think speaks volumes about the quality of this.

 
Kirnu
The first ever Intamin Zac Spin. Not a phrase that fills you with joy. I wasn't sure how I'd react to this, and ultimately I didn't enjoy it. The spinning is okay until the end, when it does it's only flip but drops you down head first. The rest of the ride is okay, but still not great. I hate to think what longer versions of this are like. In fairness, we did it twice, so it can't have been THAT awful, but it is significantly less pleasant when you board the station in the backwards facing seats. It's sad to think about how there are such contrasting Intamins in such close proximity.
 
Staff were very insistent on balancing the cars too, which took some time, and we even saw some staff members having to ride it to ensure this balance happened. Those poor souls. 


Ukko
Oh dear. This thing. My first Maurer Sky Loop, and this definitely is up there with one of the most awful experiences I've had on any ride. Whoever thought that a vertical lift hill going back on itself and hanging you upside down was a good idea must have been a bloody sadist. We were sat near the front, which meant we had dreadful hangtime, and it was genuinely one of the most uncomfortable experiences I've had, along with the bad restraints of a Maurer too. Then you do an inversion, seesaw and get off, questioning your life choices. 

 
Tulireki
The world's only standing Mack E-Motion coaster. What's an E-Motion coaster, I hear you ask? It's basically a coaster where the cars are meant to 'tilt' as you go round corners, thanks to some springs and stuff in the cars. You notice this as you board the cars, as they bounce around a bit. But after that, you hardly notice it at all. Except for the fact that this coaster is uncomfortable, bordering on rough. There's a drop where you literally shunt and jerk back and forth, and I slammed my back pretty hard. Another not pleasant one.
 
There's a couple of other coasters: Salama, a Maurer spinner that doesn't really spin, Pikajuna, a Mack powered coaster which, though not bad, has a long layout and goes round 3 times, making it boring, and Linnunrata eXtra, a custom Zierer built inside an old water tower. Linnunrata has optional VR goggles: I tried them on my first ride, selecting the horror versions (they had 3 choices). It was okay, nothing special, suffers from the same problems all other VR coaster have I guess, but since you don't have headphones, the atmosphere is hurt due to the lack of sound. Without the VR, there's some pretty cool space theming throughout the ride, and it's much nicer than the VR. Would recommend no VR.

 
Outside of the coasters, the park has some really decent rides: Kyöpelinvuoren Hotelli, a very well done ghost train with lots of special effects and surprises, Hurjakuru, a rapids ride featuring some scary waterfalls, an ever-flowing sprinkler tower with fire effects, and a generally decent layout and Kingi, a 75m tall gyro drop tower, which gives good views of the park and Helsinki. 


(their Enterprise and Ferris Wheel align beautifully at night!)
 
But what about Iik!Week?
It was impossible to know what to expect from the event; finding information and reviews online was difficult, and they seem to change everything each year. This year, the event included:
-2 Halloween exclusive mazes, rated 13+
-1 Halloween exclusive maze, for families/all
-2 overlays of existing attractions, rated 13+
-An outdoor attraction, which was basically a walkway, rated 13+
-A zombie disco outdoor area; with live DJ, bar and actors, rated 18+
-The area where most of the attractions are transformed into a scare zone, again rated 13+
 
All attractions started at 4pm, except the Zombie Disco which started at 6pm.
 
Despite the park being quite small, this did lead to a 'Thorpe effect' where only a section of the park felt like Halloween, and the rest of the park feeling pretty normal. Anyways, onto the attractions (with spoilers)..

 
Laboratorio (Laboratory)
Visitors to the park's harshest site are horribly awaited by the victims of failed human experiments who have been locked away at a research facility.
The first maze we did and the one which was marketed as the scariest; this would set the scene for the event. Before entering the maze, you're given a rope for everyone to hold to keep you together; this seemed to just be an alternative to hands-on-shoulders in keeping the group together.
 
A pre-show by a military person explains the backstory, and warns us to stick together, don't touch anything because of radiation, and to walk slowly. The maze itself was very well themed - a surprise from a city park where theming is sparse! Each scene is basically a room from the laboratory, where a failed human experiment is behind a window / cage. The actors themselves also looked great - amazing costumes and make up. But they weren't very scary. One experiment came out of their cage and chased us a bit, and another slammed a door. 
 
After barely a minute of slow walk, a sign pointing you to the exit appears, but then there's a monster for one final scare. The monster costume looked stunning, and must have been over 7ft tall. The actor did a really good job given they must have had limited movement, but they were also equipped with what looked like 3 large hairdryers stuck together as a 'weapon', which felt...odd.  
 
So yeah, a very short maze with little scares, but with great sets and great costumes and a good number of actors considering.

 
Zombie Tunnel
A zombie invasion created by a nuclear fallout haunts amateurs in an old nuclear silo tunnel. Horror lovers have only one way to protect themselves - the green radioactive light source causes the zombies to retreat. Step into the twilight corridor where horror-zombies scare away!
The other Halloween exclusive maze takes place in a temporary structure in one of the kids lands in the park (with 2-3 kids rides actually closed for the event). 
 
At the start of the maze, everyone is handed a green lightsaber (like a cheap pound shop one) to guide your way, with their in-story purpose being to scare away the zombies that await. These also serve a second, more obvious purpose though - to help you see. The maze itself only seemed to have one light throughout, and was otherwise very dark, so the lightsaber was essential to help you see.
 
The maze was again very short, effectively a horseshoe shape. There were quite a lot of actors (again, all with very good make up), but all bar one of them were stuck behind fencing, and all they could do was slam and growl. It was a very jarring experience, as there's no fear there whatsoever (even a girl who was in our group who looked around 13/14 wasn't the least bit scared). And given the theming for the maze was effectively fences and black tarpaulin, there wasn't much too it. 
 
Again, a short maze with little scares, but a fun concept and a good number of actors. 


 
Kauhusirkus (Horror Circus)
Do you dare to step into the Horror Circus of bloodthirsty clowns?
This is an 'overlay' of the park's other dark ride, Taikasirkus (Magic Circus). The ride was open before 4pm without actors, and we tried it - it was a suspended dark ride that goes through different scenes at a circus, with fun animatronics and such. The gondolas turn/spin slightly at different points throughout the ride too, to showcase different points within each scene. There was no audio, though apparently there usually is, which was odd..
 
After 4pm, the ride has actors (one in every scene, so about 6). The actors are allowed everyone - in the sets, in front of, behind and underneath the cars! The actors, were, unsurprisingly, clowns. This wasn't particularly scary (certainly a push to make this 13+..), but the actors occasionally hid and did (predictable) jump scares, making it a more fun/scary experience. Real highlight was an actor appearing in front of us, then as our gondola spun around, he decided to lay on the floor, as a fun way of surprising us.
 
Again, the actors looked really good, and this was well done.
 
Kammokuja (Abhorrence Alley)
The dead spirits have been wandering in the corridors of Kammokuja. There is also a large butcher living in the alley ...
An overlay of the park's 3D walkthrough (which was much like a spookier version of Hocus Pocus Hall at Chessington), which basically just included a couple of actors hidden around corners. It was fun, but the actors seemed very restricted in what they could do. For example, one actor literally just appeared from round a corner holding a tray of tea, said in a creepy voice 'Would you like some tea?', and then waited for us to move on with no further interaction.
 
The ending featured a large and loud male actor bashing on a wall brandishing a knife. Probably enough to get younger kids out quickly, but again, this felt a bit tame for a 13+ experience.
 
The outdoor walkway had some clown animatronics, the family friendly maze was just an outdoor labyrinth where the walls were spider webs (no actors) and the scare zone had a couple of sets of actors going round a couple of times.

 
Zombie Disco
The reason for this being 18+ was because of the bar; I imagine it makes it easier for serving drinks when you don't have to ID everyone when it's busy. As the park was very quiet, so too was the disco area, which meant it was lacking in atmosphere. However, the actors here did a great job; all interacting with every group personally, spending lots of time with any group there and staying in character very well. It was also nice to see zombies which don't grunt or growl at you, as many theme park mazes resort to.
 
A shout out to the zombie footballer, who at one point started a kick about with people in the area, then proceeded to do several keepy uppies (whilst remaining in perfect character!), and then carried on as if it was nothing. That was impressive!


 
So Iik!Week was a weird one. Clearly the park know their stuff when it comes to doing scary things: the costumes, set design (largely) and acting quality (mostly) were all very good in my opinion. Plus their ghost train is scary too. But it seems like they've held themselves back, like they don't want to create attractions which actually scare people, despite having everything there to do so. I really don't believe a park which has the creative levels they've shown wouldn't be able to get over the final hurdle of actually making something scary.
 
It's a shame, because they've got enough variation to do even one actually scary experience, and then keep the rest more fun. I hope that whatever their reasons, whatever their thought process, they decide to change their mind and do something actually scary in the future. In saying that, I still enjoyed the event, so can't really complain!
 
And that's that! Without Taiga, Linnanmäki would be one of those 'if you're in the area, visit' or 'if you've ran out of other parks to visit' types of parks. It's fun, but nothing standout enough. But with Taiga, they've got a truly exceptional ride, with enough of a supporting line up to be a really solid park which is well worth the visit!
 
How busy was it?
Surprisingly quiet! Thanks to some wet weather (which only lasted for a couple fo hours on and off), the park wasn't very busy, and we didn't queue longer than 15mins for anything. By about 8-9pm, everything was walk on.
How easy is it to get too?
The park is about a 30-40min bus ride from Helsinki airport
Is there anything else nearby?
Helsinki has a few bits; we did an indoor horror mini golf course, the Helsinki SkyWheel, Helsinki Flying Theatre and Helsinki SeaLife (which is joined onto the park)
How expensive is it?
Helsinki isn't cheap, and flying out there is a bit costly. We stayed in a hostel, booking a private room for 3 people which cost about €20pp, which helped reduce costs.

(and as ever, excuse the horrid photos..!)

When I say to people I'm going on a holiday with a week of rollercoasters, they ask what do I like about rides. At first I said it was the rollercoasters and all the different rides but as I've grown up it is completely all about the immersion and escapism. And nowhere is escapism more true in the Netherlands which has seen massive park expansions in the last ten years. Theme parks are fully upping their games and as I've wanted to revisit Efteling and take my first trip to Toverland, 2019 seemed like the right time to take a visit.. so...
 
Walibi Holland
 
We had a game plan here, to hit Lost Gravity first and all the other rollercoasters before trying out Untamed. This plan fell completely apart when both Untamed and Lost Gravity delayed opening. So instead we tried Goliath first
 
Goliath
.
For those that know me, I'm not a massive fan of the earlier Intamin rides. I don't have a high opinion of Expedition Ge Force and as much as I like Millennium Force it isn't a ride with much content. Goliath was a pretty pleasant surprise. It's got a lot going on but weirdly has a lukewarm reception in coaster circles. Lots of air time, two big helixes, a pretty amazing turn around after the large hill where the train turns to its side to corner. I was pretty impressed with the ride staff too who ran a very efficient ride. For those that have been on EGF, the loading takes a long time. Here, the staff were fast and the trains never stacked. This gained a 61 minute queue through the day but luckily we only queued 10 minutes for both of our rides.
7/10
 
El Condor

 
The true highlight of Walibi Holland is the stunning El Condor, the worlds first Vekoma SLC. Now we only queued 10 minutes luckily for this but later on in the day this had a 90 minute queue. It was as rough as expected and if you have done an SLC, you know exactly what to expect.
 
4/10
 
We took a walk round the park as the parks Rock and rollercoaster clone now had an hour queue as did the Vekoma boomerang. Lost Gravity and Untamed still weren't open so we took a ride on the kiddy coaster and the Vekoma Madhouse which was very cheesy with its early 2000's sound effects. The ride was good though, the same as Hex really just a bit less themed. I enjoyed this surprisingly.
 
It was after having a little look around that we saw that Lost Gravity was open. We queued 97 minutes for this..
 

 
This is a more extreme Mack then most with thrilling inversions, good air time and a very different layout. Think of a Gerstlauer eurofighter but with even more aggressive drops. Later on in the day we took advantage of the single rider queue (majority of Walibi Hollands rides have them) and got on in about ten minutes. The outer seats on this are slightly rougher then your average Mack ride but it is very good.


The main queuing cattlepen.
 
8/10
 
And wallah, straight after it was over to the now open Untamed.

This ride reminds me of the entirety of Margate with large love letters all around the queuing area and on the rides main lift hill. One issue with the queue is because it's mainly a dirt pathway, in the rain everyone just gets a bit muddy on their trousers. It also has no cover so we just end up soaked by the time we got to get on. In the sun I can imagine it might be a bit much.

The ride is absolutely fantastic. I genuinely find it incredible that this company just installs hit after hit. When people hype things up to a degree, I normally try to keep myself controlled and not read into the praise. It makes me glad that I can come to each ride with a completely open mind and just enjoy the ride for what it is. And Untamed was outstanding. Everything I value about rides sits in this attraction such as the great drops and air time, the insane pacing which particularly at the end of this ride is non-stop and breathtaking. For me it just lacks the length of Steel Vengeance but is worlds above Goliath at SFGA.
10/10 and easily a top five rollercoaster.
 

 
Rest of the day was just trying to lap up the other rides and get some credits such as the Vekoma Boomerang which was far above others of its type.
 
And so, Walibi Holland is an interesting park. I'm not sure if I'm particularly bothered about getting back as to be honest its not so much a theme park as it is an amusement park. It's clearly going from strength to strength and its future is fully secure with Untamed being one of the best rides in Europe.
 
Toverland
 
With no exaggeration, Toverland is one of my favourite parks in Europe. Considering the park only opened in 2001, it has gone from strength to strength to have one of the best rollercoaster line ups and themed areas I could possibly want. This is what a theme park is to me, beautiful areas and rides that look beautiful, ride well and a place where you can just relax, sit back and just immerse yourself.
 
Fenix
Fenix represents the last of the B&M's in Europe for me to ride. I initially completed this on Flug Der Demon last year but then this and Valkyria opened. 

 
Fenix is quite unlike all the other B&M wing riders I've done. The others are pretty... slow is a fair assessment. But this one absolutely zooms through its layout and is by far the fastest and most intense wing rider I've done. We managed front row on both sides and also near the back of both.
The main drawbacks is the initial start of the ride is just a bit empty box. They've attempted theming with an ice dragon head breathing smoke at you but this start is 'lacklustre'. Once you finally get going though, what follows is an intense start with great air time, massive helixes and an enjoyable ride.

7/10
I love a list so..
1. Gatekeeper
2. Flug Der Demon
3. Fenix
4. Raptor
5. The Swarm
6. X-Flight
 
Troy
 
Excellent GCI. When people criticise Wicker Man for being too short I sort of understand it, especially from people who have ridden Troy. It is an action packed thriller of a woodie that has a long length and great air time moments.
 
Dwivelwind

8/10
 
Wow. What a ride this is. We managed eight rides during our day and each one was better than the last. This thing spins like absolute crazy and is so re-rideable. Very much a big surprise and a highlight of the trip.
 
And the final main ride of the trip is the Booster Bike which is okay but pales into significance to the other rollercoasters.
 
To get an idea of how beautiful this place is though, here's a few photos fro Avalon which I adored and could have spent hours in. What an enchanting and magical place.

So yeah, Please go.
 
We also went to Efteling and Disneyland Paris which were both excellent days out. I love Efteling so much, its a real gem of a theme park and Baron 1898 just makes me squeal. Love it.
 
Many thanks.?
 

When going to Chicago the nearest park worth giving a sh** about is certainly Six Flags Great America (unless you're willing to drive to Cedar Point).
They have been rapidly expanding in the past ten years or so with coasters being added left and right, heck Great America have probably got the best deal out of any Six Flags park in the past ten years.
They received a kiddie woodie (wasn't too fussed on getting that cred), a B&M Wing, a RMC, a freespin, and recently a S&S launch.
 
This park really gave me Thorpe Park vibes. The park is fairly compact with a lot of the rides being kinda on top of each other.
Whizzer is right next to Maxx Force and Maxx Force gets quite close to Raging Bull and Raging Bull is next to Demon and Demon goes up right close to X Flight, ect, ect.
Just like Thorpe a lot of the rides are very packed in to the space and walking around is fairly easy with that in mind.
 
Goliath:

 
Goliath is the park's groundup RMC woodie and despite not being anywhere near the level of Steel Vengeance the ride is pretty insane.
The ride's first drop is certainly the highlight with a very steep angle and the signature ejector RMC's are known for.
Other than the drop the ride has one more airtime moment before the dive loop which also gives great ejector.
 
On the inversion front the dive loop is good fun and the zero g stall is orgasmic.
Sadly the ride is kinda neutered by its shortness but I would still rank it in my top 10 because it still kicks ass.
 
I think if this thing was longer and had more airtime I would like it more, though Zadra will probably show us what a longer Goliath would ride like anyway.
Overall my favourite ride in the park but its short length makes it worse than New Texas Giant and Steel Vengeance IMO.
 
V2:
I have to admit I really was a fan of Wicked Twister, I really enjoyed the powerful launches and the spikes were brilliant fun.
Vertical Velocity managed to wow me even more due to one of the spikes actually being just plain straight which gave the ride a brilliant drop if you were in the back!
 
The ride like Wicked Twister is just a lot of fun and not anything mind-blowing, but V2's tight footprint and fun launches give it a pretty pivotal position in the Great America lineup.
 
 
The Joker:

 
S&S Freespins.. A incredibly divisive coaster model that due to the mass cloning seems to be fairly disliked,
people seem to hate these things and honestly I don't know why.
 
I loved The Joker, I actually preferred it over a B&M Hyper, don't @ me..
Why do I like this ride and model? Let me explain.
 
The Joker is a incredibly unpredictable and re-ridable coaster that always left me wanting to get back in line for.
Its a short ride but it packs a punch and you never quite know how your cycle is going to treat you, it might be a fairly tame cycle or you might get brutally spun for the duration, you never know.
I know some people hate this coaster because of this but I liked it, I thought it made the coaster more re-ridable as every ride is vastly different from the other.
 
When the ride does give you brutal cycles its utter insanity, heck this is the only coaster that me feel flat out scream, you feel so out of control on this thing.
I think for its footprint The Joker is brilliant for this park and I would love this ride at a park like Thorpe Park.
 
 
 
Batman: (no pics cos idgaf)
Batman at Great America is the first of the Batman clones (and the first invert)  and overall its a fun ride.
I certainly prefer Raptor and Nemesis but its a solid invert with good intensity.
 
The one thing that made me a little annoyed with this ride was pi** poor operations and stacking which made my Europa Fanboy heart break.
Despite the Six Flags operations the ride was a solid invert that blows Inferno out of the water.
 
 
American Eagle:
American Eagle is the parks huge racing woodie built by Intamin. The ride overall was incredibly fun though it certainly shows its age.
The ride has some brilliant airtime moments and a brutal turn-around, overall I found the bunny hills toward the end to be a particular highlight.
The operations on this ride were honestly pretty shocking to be honest though- lengthy stacking, only one side operating for most of the 3 days despite a lengthy queue!
Sure Gemini only runs one side a lot of the time but Gemini never had a queue and its throughput is still pretty great with just one side.
The queue with one side operating on American Eagle was literally painful to watch.. 
 
Overall a great classic woodie though I would like GCI to perhaps re-track some of this ride as it certainly shows its age! 
I would also like Six Flags to be less like Six Flags.
 
 
Viper:

 
Viper.. Despite a unoriginal layout, what a brilliant wooden coaster.
This ride is just plain fun with great airtime and overall just a complete classic that certainly stills remains a gem in the lineup.
The ride is rough enough to have character but is smooth enough to be enjoyable, it really is what a wooden coaster should be.
Unlike other rides in the park Viper had a really good crew running it and the theming was also pretty decent for Six Flags.
Overall a complete classic that deserves to stay in the park for years to come.
 
Raging Bull:

 
I wasn't expecting much going in, what I got was booooorrrrrinnnnnng.
If you think Silver Star isn't all that great you'll fall asleep on Raging Bull, Silver Star at least has a great second half and is actually interesting!
Raging Bull is nicknamed by many as 'Raging Dull' and honestly it lives up to the name, the ride is just a bunch of forceless turns with a few airtime moments that give no airtime.
I actually prefer Titan at Six Flags Over Texas, that ride was kinda boring but the helixes after the mid course made me grey out every time, Raging Bull was literally forceless.
 
Don't get me wrong this isn't a bad coaster, but its certainly one of the worst if not the worst B&M Hyper.
I get why it has a twister layout due to space but they could at least could of made this more.. Interesting?
On the upside the crew on this were hauling with operations, they ran two trains and managed to dispatch trains before the other train even made it to the final breaks! That is pretty amazing for Six Flags! 
 
Dark Knight:
Dark Knight is a pretty fun enclosed wild mouse, It certainly doesn't have the most intricate theme, but its fine.
Nothing less, nothing more. I think having a indoor coaster is good for the park though.
 
Superman:
This ride was kind of a tragedy to me. Let me explain.
Superman is a great B&M flyer that completely blows Air out of the water, easily one of the top rides at the park and something you'll wanna ride a fair amount.
 
Then you remember this is Six Flags. It takes YEARS for trains to dispatch (like 4 minute+) and this ride team seemed especially unmotivated and miserable.
What could of been a 10 minute queue was 30 minutes, and the staff seemed about as cheerful as someone at funeral.
 
Its a shame cos Superman is probably my favourite B&M at the park and maybe even the best B&M of the trip.
It really sucks that the operations are god awful and so dreary, hopefully the team in other years are nowhere near as bad as this years.
Sure a bit of stacking would be okay as flying coasters aren't the easiest rides to load but Superman was just stupid with stacking trains on sitting on the brake run for what seems like eternity.
 
Overall an amazing B&M ruined by really depressing operations. That pretzel loop is sexy though.
 
 
 
Demon
Demon was a fun arrow coaster, I probably wouldn't rank it above Corkscrew though due to Corkscrew's really fun airtime hill.
Unlike Corkscrew, Demon had some cool theming throughout its layout and it interacts with X Flight towards the end which is cool.
All in all, a fun ride but nothing to shout at.
 
Whizzer

 
Whizzer was a fun family coaster but I wouldn't say its anything to scream about.
Its got a cool lift hill and a fun tree hugging layout, like for a family coaster its cool.
The operations were truly awful though- stacking was nearly as bad as Superman and it made a 5 minute queue at Europa into a 40 minute queue as staff just stood like statues in the station.
 
Not the best Schwarzkopf (Shockwave is the sh**), though Whizzer is a fun family coaster.
 
X Flight
 

 
X flight as a whole just reminds me of Swarm.
They both have a similar-ish layout, similar stats, and just overall I would rank them about the same.
X flight feels a smidge bit longer and the layout doesn't have that awkward turn around like Swarm does so I think I give X Flight a slight lead, though honestly they are about the same in my rankings.
If you have ridden Swarm you know its a very graceful ride (perhaps a little too graceful) and the ride overall is all about the wing sensation, these wing coasters aren't really built for high forces or crazy elements.
 
Overall X Flight pretty much rode how I thought it would, its a fine coaster and its something different in the lineup.
 
 

 
 
Operations:
After such great operations at Cedar Point and Europa I think Six Flags was a bit of a shock. Cedar Point and Europa are incredibly efficient with operations and Six Flags Great America just weren't.. These ops were probably the second worst I have ever seen at a major park, only behind Portaventura. If you haven't guessed from this review, I value operations quite high when I visit parks so this kinda got on my nerves.
 
 
Overall: 
Six Flags Great America overall is a park with a great lineup of coasters (especially now they have Maxx Force) which is certainly a fun time for credit whores.
I do think when it comes to operations and beauty Great America really is very lacking which means this park is really about the rides and nothing else.
On the upside the food is pretty decent and Six Flags is pretty reasonably priced, so in terms of cost its a pretty good deal.
 
I think Great America is a park that you should do at least once if you have the opportunity, I don't think its a park I would visit again unless they added another big coaster but its a good park nevertheless. I'm certainly not itching to go back like Cedar Point but its certainly a good park.
 
Anyway hope you enjoyed,
peace.
 
 
 
 

I have made no secret that Europa Park is my current favourite theme park.
Something about Europa Park just makes it feel like more than a theme park, it feels 'magical' in a way, the feeling that everybody uses to describe Disney (which ironically IMO doesn't reign true)..
Anyway today I'm gonna review and basically talk about every ride and area (bar the kids areas), get your popcorn folks, this will be a long one..
 
Germany:
The opening area of Europa Park is a great introduction to the park.
It doesn't have many rides but its very picturesque and full of flowers and fountains.
The Germany section usually always has street entertainers too which is neat.
 

 
Voletarium
The main attraction in Europa Park's Germany area is their huge flying theatre, Voletarium.
My only other experience of a flying theatre is the one at Ferrari Land so I was pretty excited to compare the two.
I was generally a fan of the one at Ferrari Land but I can safely say this is better.
 
First and foremost the queue-line for this ride is themed so well it made me question if I was even queuing?
The main ride itself is huge and the experience itself felt longer than the one at Ferrari Land.
Overall I think Voletarium fits really well with the huge vault of dark rides that Europa has in its arsenal, overall a great addition which I think is pretty hard to hate.

Italy:
Italy is one of the smaller areas in the park but like Germany it is stupidly pretty.
The main square overall is just aesthetically pleasing and the area has a few fun things to do.
Ghost Castle is a throughput monster that is quirky and very cheesey, overall a very fun  dark ride.
Volo da vinci is a pretty fun and theming in the station is pretty neat.
Piccolo mondo is tiny but is a very cute little dark ride. Very charming.
 
Italy has a few great shows alongside the rides, this year I saw their "Rulantica: The Musical" show.
This show was pretty damn good. Singing was great, props were great, and there was english translation via a big tv for those who don't speak German.
The show was pretty damn long clocking in at 50 minutes! The show felt more like something that should be on the West End than a German theme park.
 
Switzerland:
Switzerland is probably one of my personal favourite areas at the park.
The running stream, the bridge over the water, the narrow alleys, the swiss houses, it looks sooo good.
Matterhorn Blitz is a very fun wild mouse with a awesome elevator lift and a fun first drop.
Swiss Bob Run is probably one of the weakest coasters at the park. I really hope they give this the "Eurosat" treatment soon. The ride itself looks amazing but riding it is kinda.. Eh.
 
France:
France is probably the area you'll spend the most time in due to housing two big coasters and its closeness to the exit.
The area itself is lush like most Europa areas and the main plaza is one of the prettiest parts of the park.
 
Silver Star

 
Silver Star has always been a inconsistent ride for me.
Some rides on it make me think its top 5 worthy, some rides on it make me think its boring as fu**, it depends on the day, the seat, and the gods.
2 of the 3 rides I had on it were pretty great so I would probably rank it favourably, but I think its certainly a ride that depends on the seat and the day.
For now I would say its probably #3 in the park, Wodan and Blue Fire are certainly better IMO.
 
Eurosat: CanCan Coaster
(ignore this bad picture of the exit)..

 
Eurosat before 2018 was always a favourite of mine. It was pretty rough but overall it was a fun coaster.
It was fast, fairly long, and overall was a fun ride.
Due to its age the ride was pretty rough, the brake run and a few of the first turns were in particular very painful and abrupt.
 
Last year Europa decided to refurb Eurosat, and holy fu** they were not kidding.
This isn't a retheme, a retrack, new trains, VR added, new effects, its everything I just mentioned and more.
The queue line and station are completely unrecognisable, a lot of it you wouldn't believe was Eurosat.
The ride itself now has a ton of new theming elements including a effiel tower on the spiral lift hill and a bunch of colourful lights during the main ride.
The ride is also now butter smooth and rides like a B&M, any roughness that was there is now gone.
Eurosat CanCan coaster took what was fun about Eurosat and just ran with it, the whole experience is fab and it makes me wonder what rides will be redone next.
 
Madame Freudenreich
Woah, what was a disgustingly boring mess is now a very fun attraction that is just pure fun.
How the hell did they make such a bad attraction so good? The finale with the birthday was just all too cute for me to handle.
I would now say this is one of the best dark rides out of the 800 dark rides this park has.
 
Greece:
Greece is right next to France and is home to the very picturesque Poseidon.

 

 
Poseidon
Poseidon aesthetically is awesome. Its bunny hop over the rocks, its station, just so lush..
Sadly the first coaster section is pretty uncomfortable and I think needs retracking.
The finale with the drop and the bunny hop remains very fun.
 
Greece also is home to Pegasus which is a very neat family coaster,
you also have the park's shooting dark ride which is always good fun.
 
Russia:
Home to Euromir and the best ride in the park, Russia is a pretty neat (but small) area.

 
Euromir: 
Euromir seems to be a very marmite ride.
You either adore this coaster or you plain think its boring.
 
I think its a great ride to be honest. Sure its got a lot of meandering before the main coaster, but when you do reach the actual coaster it is actually very intense!
If you go backwards for the rides finale then you get a lot of positive G's on the turns.
Euro-Mir I think is easily the #5 or #6 for me at the park- great ride.
Also who doesn't love a good German rave? 
 

 
Also in Russia is the beast, the best, the absolute best ride I have ever ridden..
Go home Fury 325, Steel Vengeance, you have nothing on Snowflake (aka bench) at Europa Park.
My favourite section had to be the drop track and the sea serpent roll.
 
Adventureland (Africa tbh)
This is a pretty nice area with a large lake.
There is a boat style ride that goes around the lake alongside a little raft ride, overall pretty insignificant.
 
 

 

 
Luxembourg:
My rolls are bigger than this area.
 
England:
Really more of a support area.
I think  a RMC themed to brexit would liven things up here.
They do have a few fun flats though and a really good acrobatics show
 

 
Austria:
Austria is towards the back of the park and is home to their log flume and their splendid powered coaster.
Best thing about the area is the world of diamonds.
 
 
Arthur- In the Minimoys Kingdom:
Home to a few flats and obviously Arthur.
Arthur like always is a truly magical coaster and dark ride.
The ride never gets boring, its a utter gem.
I really hope Mack sell more of this ride type, Arthur showcases just how much this ride model can achieve.
 

 
 

 
Spain:
Spains biggest claim to fame is its shows and a few flats.
The stunt show is pretty damn good and kolumbusjolle is a great flat ride.
The area like England is a tad small.
 
Scandanavia:
Sadly this area wasn't finished on my visit at the park though what was finished looked great!
Fjord was still open though and I have to admit that Fjord is awesome, easily my favourite rapids.
 

 
Portugal:
Portugal really only has one ride worth talking about- ass.
Alantica Super Splash is good fun when its hot, probably not as fun as Poseidon but overall its a neat ride.
 
 

 

 
Iceland
Like France this is a area you'll probably spent a lot of time in due to it housing two of the biggest coasters.
Besides the dynamic duo you have Whale Tours which is a fun water ride, but we all know why you go to Iceland..

Wodan 
Wodan remains my favourite in the park.
Wickerman is certainly fun, but Wodan is just absolutely crazy.
It has constant pops of airtime and just feels relentless throughout.
Its easily the most intense ride at the park and never fails to leave me breathless after riding,
 

 

 
Blue Fire
Blue Fire remains the butter smooth coaster with the heartline that makes you its bitch.
I really enjoy the re-rideability of this ride, its one of those coasters you can just ride over and over.
I think it is easily is the second best ride in the park.
 

 
I hope you enjoyed this review despite its length (not as long as Euro Mir's lift hill)
Next review will be Cedar Point!
 

 
 
 
 
 

*This blog is getting bumped rip*
 
So I have to admit that during late 2017/early 2018 I was incredibly cynical and skeptical over Wickerman during its construction.
the layout to me just looked really mediocre and in a way I just writ off because its layout looked a bit naff to me, I think this was amplified even more due to Wodan being my only experience with GCI and with it being more than double the height and size of Wickerman.
 
"
...
So last year as a enthusiast I kinda failed.
I only visited Lego, Chessie, and Thorpe, I just didn't get round to going up north and riding Wickerman or Icon.
Even worse my only only abroad park was  Portaventura.. Yuck.. Thorpe is better than..
 
This year though I think I am somewhat going to redeem myself. I'm heading to Europa in May and going to Six Flags GMerica and Cedar Point in June,
I'm not gonna fail like I did last year.. One trip this year though left me with "would I make it?" and that was Alton Towers.
After a bunch of last minute plans I finally headed to ride Wickerman, I would finally be able to form a proper opinion on the ride.
 

 
So after a 3 hour drive I headed into the park for ERT and a early ride on Wickerman.
I have to say it looks pretty sexy from afar.. 
 
So I have to admit I wasn't expecting a pre-show, it caught me off guard a little.
Overall the pre-show was kinda neat, it certainly was well done but I found it was a little dark for a coaster that has a 1.2 restriction, I also felt on repeat rides it got a little old too..
After exiting the pre-show I was very lucky to be instantly batched to the front row on my first ride, I nearly snogged the guy giving out the rows.
 

 
So as soon I get off Wickerman I was instantly very impressed- its well paced, fun, full of airtime pops and some fun GCI banks.
The coaster is a lot better than I was giving it credit for, its really what Alton needed.
 
The theming around the ride adds to the ride in a fun way (especially in the front row) and the main structure itself looks very cool.
The coaster I found had a few minor pops of air in the front but had some pretty aggressive ejector pops in the back, if you want a more intense ride I would say the back is your best bet, especially on the first drop!
The coaster runs very much like Wodan, it has a constant fast pace to it and never seems to slow down, its also decently long too.
 
The coaster itself was running three trains on my visit (which is great for a merlin park!) but it did stack quite a bit so don't expect Wodan style capacity.
Overall Wickerman is probably my favorite on park and maybe even my favorite in the UK.
Its not quite as insane as Wodan but its still a great ride in its own right and is a great ride for those who can't be arsed to go to Europa or Toverland.
 
Wickerman is proof that Merlin can build good rides, hopefully Merlin decide to add more GCI's in the future.. #Thorpe4GCI
 
8/10

 
With that last post, I wasn't wrong.. But Wickerman is brilliant for this country and I'm glad I can get my GCI fix closer to home now.
3 rides on this beast only hyped me more to ride Wodan again.
 
Hope you enjoyed the review

The third and final day of the Pleasure Beach Experience European park event took place at Phantasialand, where we were expecting a 30-minute ERT on Black Mamba and lunch included.
 
Before I review the park itself, can I just say what incredible treatment we had from their corporate/events team.  Having expected the above, we also got a night time ERT on Taron (joining the hotel guests) followed by 2 PBE group rides, early morning rides on Maus au Chocolat and Chiapas (before the park opened) as well as both cycles on Mystery Castle at the end of the day.  In addition, we were given four fast passes each and of course the lunch, it was truly incredible and the park went above and beyond to make sure we had a good day.
 
Onto the park itself, I was absolutely blown away by the scale and detail of some of the theming, it puts anything in the UK to absolute shame in that respect; from the dark tone of Klugheim to the vibrant areas elsewhere, and queueing for Talocan felt more like watching a show!  The landscaping, theming and audio truly sets this park apart from anywhere else I’ve ever seen in terms of a themed experience park.
 
The park was incredibly busy on the Saturday however operations were slick meaning we managed to ride most things, unfortunately River Quest was only using one of the two elevators and the queue moved extremely slowly as a result but apart from that, everything else was run very efficiently and queues were always moving.
 
Saturday Ride count
Taron x11 (10 during night time ERT)
Black Mamba x8 (ERT)
Chiapas x2
River Quest x1
Talocan x1
Winjas Fear x1
Winjas Force x1
Raik x1
Colorado Adventure x1
Mystery Castle x1
Maus Au Chocolat x1
Geister Rikscha x1
 
TOTAL: 30
 
Sunday Ride count (non-event day, in park 10:30 – 4pm)
Taron x1
Black Mamba x1
Raik x1
Winjas Fear x1
Colorado Adventure x1
Talocan x1
Feng Ju Palace x1
Temple of the Night Hawk x1
Hollywood Tour x1
Wurmling Express x1
Geister Rikscha x1
 
TOTAL: 11
 
 
Onto the rides!
 
Taron
Taron is truly an incredible coaster in every respect, from the landscaping, theming through to the coaster itself it’s near-perfection.
 

 
Entering Klugheim the twisted metal track becomes visible through literal mountains of rockwork, with the audio blaring out, it’s just stunning and features such as the waterfall, launch audio and night-time lighting all add to the experience.
 

 

 
The queue-line starts well but unfortunately goes through to a poorly-decorated cattlepen area, a shame really as all the work building that immersion into the area is lost the moment you enter that.
 
Queue aside, you enter the station, board the train and the launch audio kicks in… following a short corner you’re launched forcefully into an overbank, followed by an incredible airtime hill (it looks tame but is crazy!) and a sharp turn then snap to the right; following a few more meandering turns, you’re dropped down into the second launch which is INCREDIBLE.
 

 
The surrounding walls and nearby theming adds to the sensation of speed as you enter the second launch, and the sound is just amazing… following this you’re thrown up (getting splashed slightly by the waterfall if you’re on the left) and into a fantastic second half; it has all the qualities of the first and more, with closer interactions with the theming, sharper transitions and some very forceful turns.  The only criticism I have is the trim brakes on the final airtime hills.
 

 
Overall, Taron is an absolutely spectacular roller coaster.  I actually like the fact that it isn’t flat-out intense all the way through, with some of the turns offering breathers before you enter the next section.  The theming is incredible for the most part, audio is fantastic and the coaster holds its own and would be amazing even without everything else.  10/10.
 
Black Mamba
A very fun B&M invert, again the theming is incredible and some of the near-misses are terrifying, I’d go as far to say it’s the most effective use of near-miss elements I’ve ever seen on a coaster.
 

 
I really enjoyed not knowing where the layout was going next due to all the theming, and the spiral section at the end adds a lot to the ride IMO.
 

 
The queue line and station are very atmospheric, with the station area being in near-darkness until the train enters the station.
 
Very fun coaster.
 
Chiapas
A fantastic log flume, I loved the catchy music and it’s clear the ride system is very smart and manages to do a lot very efficiently.
 

 
Much like everything else the theming/landscaping is just incredible, walking over the bridge with the drop on one side and the splashdown on the other feels quite surreal with all the decoration.
 

 
River Quest
River Quest is absolutely insane, having not done much research my reaction upon exiting the elevator and seeing what followed was basically, what the...?!
 
Good ride, came off drenched, only downside was the capacity issues.
 
Winjas Fear and Force
How haven’t I heard about these before?  They look like standard Maurer spinners in a building on first approach, but caught me completely off guard with all the surprises.  Absolutely excellent coasters.
 

 
Mystery Castle is absolutely amazing IMO, the queue theming is stunning but the ride itself is just so much fun, without ruining too much I’ll just say it’s become my favourite drop tower ride by a country mile.
 

 
Talocan is a topspin, but with the added thematics it's transformed into a really good experience; with the audio, fire and water, it feels more like watching a show from off ride!
 

 
Colorado Adventure is decent enough, the pitch-black section was fun and the capacity excellent.
 

 
Raik is okay, but much more about the theme than the ride experience itself IMO.
 
Temple of the Nighthawk – how can you do so little in so much time?
 
May be an unpopular opinion, but I really enjoyed the dark rides Geister Rikscha and Hollywood Tour – definitely in the “so bad, it’s good” category but IMO parks need rides like this to fill a gap, and they were great examples of how dark rides used to be.
 

 
Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed Phantasialand, from the rides themselves, theming and of course the way the park treated us, it has instantly become my number 2 park.
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
Thanks for reading

No creds or parks to report on in this blog post, but there'll be a few visitor attraction things. So yeah, still give it a read...
 
Monday morning came and, for whatever reason, no parks seem to open on Mondays in Poland during off peak (Legendia only opened Friday-Sunday, Energylandia closed on Mondays). So, in an unusual twist for my trips, we planned a full day of non-theme park stuff and culture.
 
The first stop of the day was Auschwitz, which was just over 30mins away from Legendia. We didn't go for a guided tour, instead opting to tour the area ourselves. I won't really go into any more details, as I don't think I need to explain just how harrowing of an experience that is. We spent a couple of hours there.
 
We then made the hour long drive into Krakow, where we were going to general touristy stuff, bit of sightseeing, eat at the Hard Rock etc. A bit of research the night before gave us some really interesting-attractions to visit:
Lost Souls Alley - a horror maze / escape room style experience
Krakow Pinball Museum - a 'museum' where, for a small fee, you can play over 40 different pinball machines and classic arcade games as much as you like
 
After a bit of wandering round, we found a third attraction of interest - Exit Room, an escape room.
 
Exit Room
https://www.exitroom.pl/
 
We stumbled upon Exit Room whilst trying to find Lost Souls Alley, and decided to book a room. They had 8 to choose from, and we opted to go for the Wolfenstein themed room. Not related to the video game series, bit sharing the same story. You are locked in a room, have an hour to escape, and the way to escape is to find the pieces of a gun to shoot an animatronic Hitler(!). It also started out quite nicely, as we were blindfolded at the start to disorientate us, and one of us was locked in a separate room to escape from as well. We didn't escape, and sadly there was no timer to give us the encouragement, but it was a very well presented escape room, and staff spoke excellent English!
 
Krakow Pinball Museum
http://www.krakowpinballmuseum.com/aboutus.html
 
This place is a real fun little gem! For about £8, you get unlimited access to lots of machines and arcade games (some classic, some new). It's a really chilled out, relaxed atmosphere, not busy, etc. Drinks were also cheap as well (everything in Poland is cheap, but in comparison to the rest of a city centre, the drinks were cheap too!). The best part was you were given a wristband, and could pop in and out throughout the day. We really got our money's worth!
 
It's a little bit geeky, maybe a guilty pleasure for some, but it's definitely something I'd recommend looking into if you're spending the day round there.
 
Lost Souls Alley
http://www.lostsoulsalley.com/index-en.php
 
I don't even know where to start with this. This is an experience which will probably stay with me for the rest of my life, and not in a good way. I didn't want to write a dedicated thing about it, but I think I'm going to have to. It requires so much explanation and set up to truly understand what this attraction is, and why it haunts me so much.
 
So yeah, suffice to say I didn't like this. Standby for more details; I'll link the thread when I've written it...
 
 
Krakow was a wonderful city to explore in general though. Lots of pretty buildings, the people were brilliant and the food was ace. The day we visited happened to be the anniversary of the Soviet Union invading Poland in the lead up to WWII (1939), which is also when the country's President and Prime Minister fled the country. There were memorial services throughout the day in various locations, which again were pretty hard hitting.
 
Another standout feature of Krakow, which sadly I didn't get a decent photo of, was a fire-breathing dragon statue by the river. Completely random, but very cool.
 
We left Krakow in the evening to go to our nearby hostel, which was very nice and simple. As I've said, it's a wonderful city, and it was nice and different to for me to spend a fully doing non-theme park stuff on a theme park trip...
 
Coming soon, Energylandia, with it's 10000000 creds, and other random stuff.

Cedar Point. Magic Mountain. Islands of Adventure. When you think of American theme parks, these three really are the gold standard when it comes to Uk enthusiast interest. And for good reason CP and MM have a tonne of rollercoasters, IOA is a goldmine for theme lovers (if you can ignore the sheds). It sometimes amazes me just how many US parks fall completely under the radar like SF over Georgia, or Carrowinds or the park I'll be reviewing, Six Flags Great America. This is no run of the mill Six Flags park, housing the worlds first B&M rollercoaster (Iron Wolf), the worlds first B&M inverter and the one B&M wing rider in the Six Flags chain not to mention the RMC or intamin coasters.
 
First thing to really cover though, Six Flags is expensive. $22 for parking and $15 for a slice of pizza. Geez. 
 
Now thats out of the way, let us begin.
 

 
X Flight opened around the same time as The Swarm and the two feel pretty similar. One of my biggest bug bears with the wing riders though is its use of effects. Up until Gatekeeper (oh I'll get to you later), all four wing riders I've done, rely massively on water or fire or mist and all four fall short because they either have nothing on at all or only a handful of effects. It's kind of frustrating knowing what the ride should be and what its actually doing. X Flight though, is safe, middle of the road B&M. We got the first ride of the day on front row left and it didn't feel like anything mind-blowing. A decent ride experience for sure, but if you want a good example, try Flug at Heide.
 
We turned our attention to Demon, an arrow looper. American parks have a lot of these old school style Arrow rides and I can't hide it, I kind of love them. Knowing they were designed with pencil and paper and sure they've been outclassed massively, they are still fun (if jerky) rides. This ride was adapted from its initial layout as well, two extra vertical loops added to compliment the two corkscrews.
 
Next, Raging Bull the only hyper twister that B&M have really ever built and I'm not sure why as this is a great ride. It's long, has air time, lots of force, an unconventional layout and the ride team were operationally perfect. I only wish we had ridden it more in a variety of seats as it was enjoyable and fun.

 
We made our way to Viper, a wooden coaster which is the mirror image of the Cyclone at Coney Island. I liked this but I took no photos of it because I'm a lazy bum.
 
Next ride was Superman Ultimate Flight which sported a 30 minute queue (so far we'd walked onto everything). This again, is super safe B&M and whilst the pretzel loop is as good as is found on Manta and Tatsu, the rest of the layout is a big underwhelming. It's better then Galatica if only for the pretzel loop but if you don't like the pretzel, there probably isn't much for you here.
 
 
With Batman: The ride closed we decided to head to Goliath, our first ever RMC. I opted for front row and what we found is a masterclass in rollercoaster design, with one problem; it's too short. The ride experience is only thirty seconds long if that but its a damn awesome ride. I was beginning to see the hype but it would be the next day where I came to really feel what RMC are capable off.
 
For now though, it was V2, one of those terrible Intamin launch impulse things and if you decide to read my Cedar Point blog, I'll save you time. These things kind of suck. If its walk on they are almost acceptable, but I've done three different versions now and they all kinda stink. It's okay though because next ride up was....
 

It was Batman time. A little bit of history, I've previously done two of these rides and been underwhelmed each time. The 7 row version in Spain wasn't great and backwards at Magic Mountain just wasn't much fun. Finally it was time for the real deal, the first ever B&M inverter.

 
It was awesome. It has theme, it is intense, it is snappy, it wastes no time at any point in the layout, its fresh coat of paint looks spectacular, it was just fantastic. 26 years on and it runs like an absolute dream. This Batman deserves all the praise regardless of the 11 other versions there are. This is the real deal.

 
With our minds blown, we had lunch (very expensive) and had a ride on the Dark Knight, an outstandingly themed Mack wild mouse. We then tried to ride Whizzer but that was a no go, went to ride Raging Bull, got in the seat then got asked to get out of the seats and back behind the loading gates. Turned out their had been a park wide power cut and nothing was operational. We took a lap of the park, seeing what was going on but decided to cut our losses and head off. We missed out on a few rollercoasters unfortunately but maybe we'll head back one day. It's a short drive from Chicago and a is a severely overlooked theme parks.
 
Six Flags in general is a bit of a dark horse. I've heard awful things in the past but with the three I've visted there's been good operations and friendly staff (not in a Cedar point 'how was your ride' kind of way either). I look forward to my next Six Flags park visit.
 
 
 

America! It’s somewhere I have wanted to go and visit since I can remember. 
  I had always dreamt of visiting here, since seeing it in films, television and more. The style and the culture.    Recently that dream became a reality, thanks to a great opportunity with some great mates. Bringing not only a chance to visit the states but one of it’s most iconic parks Cedar Point.    Now you’ve probably already read Mark9’s informative trips from here, so a different scope should be required. In my reviews I will not only mention of Cedar Point, but my full experience of the States, being my first trip outside of Europe as of 2018.   Day 0/ Sunday- Going West Wise and I parked  up at Gatwick’s long stay before joining the transfer to the terminal. After uniting with Doyle, we were good to go beginning our long descent to America!   After devouring a Spoons brunch, we hopped onboard our first of two flights with Icelandic air, who despite being relatively unknown proved to be better than expected; the engines were loud though. Like very loud!   This would be my first long haul flight (having previously flown 2 HR 40 max  on short haul). I expected a long, boring and tiring flight, but it wasn’t as bad, thanks to some on flight entertainment. Dead pool and Isle Of Dogs were amongst my choices with the odd Fawlty Towers episode.  Three hours later we arrived at Reykjavik Iceland, where we literally changed to our connecting flight  immediately. This plane was even better than the first apart from one of our screens being broken, which was unacceptable.  Another  five and a bit hours later , we finally landed at Cleveland Ohio. This was it, I was finally in America! Not after customs though.    The American custom process is much stricter and complex than the European one ( pre-Brexit at least). You are asked a number of questions upon arrival. Although the staff seemed friendly enough all instructions must be obeyed! This did take longer than first hoped. Another security check took place before we were finally out. A quick bus to our hire car company commenced before we were finally on the way once we chose our vehicle.  It was interesting to note the differences on American roads. From yellow traffic lights and lack of roundabouts. Even the cars were different in many respects. Red indicators? No front number plates? All here in America.  We finally arrived at our hotel for the trip, Cedar Point’s Express Hotel. Although simple  it was clean, tidy and welcoming.  Ride pictures above the beds is such a nice touch!  McDonald’s was our first stateside meal  (conveniently located across the road from the hotel). The burger was certainly more tasty amongst a bigger portion and unlimited refills (a common measure in US eateries).   Day 1/ Monday- The Magnificent Seven-teen Despite the long flight, I managed to wake up bright and early. Then again, I was still running on UK time so, 6am Cleveland time would equate to 11am in London.  Monday would be the first of three full days to visit Cedar Point.    Home of seventeen coasters (eighteen including both of Gemini’s track), the park boasts the second highest coaster count in the world. Least until a few years time when Energylandia will probably top it all.  The park features it’s own road/highway which may be the only major access route to the park. The views of the ride skyline make it what is arguably one of the most beautiful and impressive theme park views around!  They didn’t lie about it being a roller coast.  We parked up and arrived promptly. One of the advantages of staying at Cedar Point property is being allowed to enter for early ride time, one hour before main opening.  After playing the Star Spangled Banner, we made our way to our first attraction of the day, Steel Vengeance (the patriotism there is impressive).  New for 2018, this RMC replaced the ageing Mean Streak coaster, taking it’s layout and making it better.  The hype for this ride was unreal. I know I shouldn’t judge an attraction before riding, but I was unbelievably excited to experience this!  Such a beauty! Watching this ride going around it’s circuit!    So, how was Steel Vengeance you ask? Absolutely Incredible! The ride is impressively tall, fast and packed with airtime (both floater and ejector) and hangtime amongst a lengthy ride duration.    I came off this ride immediately knowing it to be my number one coaster, and that was just from a middle row ride!   Cedar Point may not be specialists  when it comes to turning, but SV definitely had some (if you look hard enough). From it’s styled lighting and story boards. They even feature different dispatch announcements for each train (Chess, Blackjack and Digger).  This was my first RMC, so fingers crossed I haven’t set the bar too high already and don’t appreciate others as a result.    My only criticism is naturally their ‘no phone in queue line’ policy, where phones must be put in a locker prior to riding. They even had undercover staff in the queue looking for anyone who snuck their phone in! There was also a security/police personnel at the entrance in case of abusive guests.    Things aside, Steel Vengeance is an incredible ride and worth tracking out  for alone (amongst Cedar Point’s other amazing rides).  Maverick was the second ride of our trip. This intamin blitz coaster opened  in 2007 replacing the former flume ride. I really like how they have preserved the old  station and reused it as Maverick’s queue even if it is just  your average cattle-pen.    Maverick really surprised me. Whilst I’d heard great things about this coaster, this thing literally wowed me!  From it’s tight intense transitions, landscaping down to it’s hidden launch which was just amazing.  This ride for me narrowly beats Taron due to it’s variety of elements. And turnsurprise launch. There is also a back story to this attraction too.    We had a bite to eat next at this Smokehouse place. We all had spicy sausage, chips and a muffin.  It looked a lot more delicious than this photo suggests,  I like the details on these presumably old posters and signs.  Millennium Force was number three. The hype this coaster gets is absolutely insane, so I was concerned it would be overrated (given it’s mixed reception from enthusiasts).    I queued (ages) with an open mind trying not to think of how much I might like the ride.    Millennium Force surprised me! Often ranked very highly on coaster polls I was greatly satisfied this ride turned out to be just as good (if not better) from what I was expecting.    From it’s 300 ft plus cable lift hill, the ride delivers in plenty ways. There is definitely plenty of force as this coaster flies around it’s circuit. There is also plenty of interaction a lot more airtime than I was expecting too. Who said it was forceless?    I honestly came off shaken, in a good way which is why Millennium Force gets fifth place in my top 10 (speaking in September 2018).    N.B the gap between the 2-7 on my coaster ratings is pretty minuscule.    Having done what are arguably the three biggest (and best) rides at the park it was time for something comparatively smaller, Iron Dragon.  Opening in 1987, this Arrow suspended coaster is one of just five that remain operating (once 10). It’s also the oldest to remain operating (fourth one made).  The ride wasn’t anything remarkable, although  I suppose it is one of the older ones of it’s type. Least I’ve now managed to one with the old Cars I guess.  Rougarou was next. This B&M coaster used to be a stand up but was converted to a floorless a few years ago.  I was pleasantly surprised with this ride. Like really surprised! The pacing and momentum through those inversions and helixes was superb. Truly an underrated coaster here and everything Dragon Khan should’ve been.  We headed east next to Gate Keeper, however it was down so we did Wicked Twister instead. This was a pleasant surprise and definitely a lot better than expected. The feeling of those launches and seeing the track top above was one crazy feeling!    Blue Streak followed, which was first and last wooden cred of the trip. This ride was pleasantly fun and reminded me of Big Dipper and Nick Streak at Blackpool. At 54 it is also one of the oldest coasters too.  We headed back to Gate Keeper which was now running which would by my second B&M Wing Rider.  Apart from the view onto the car park, I thoroughly enjoyed this one, from it’s selection of elements to the interactions near the entrance and theming elements! A better ride than Swarm in some areas but not in others.  We took the Sky Ride down to the entrance to experience Raptor. Not the Towers one. This version is an absolute classic and similar to the ones the first Magic Kingdom park’s used to have. They offered pleasant views of the park and peninsula. A shame Drayton spited theirs!  Raptor opened in 1994 (the same year as Nemesis) which is also a B&M invert. It was hear we also experienced our first ‘in line shutdown’. No P.A announcement but they managed to get the ride up again pretty quickly in around 10 minutes. The amount of people leaving the line without appearing disgruntled was remarkable. They certainly seem more relaxed out here! We managed front row on Raptor which turned out to be an impressive invert. It was a bit like Inferno but bigger and better. Some of those inversions really pull force and put you off guard, especially that reverse inline.  Currently my second favourite of four inverts (just four?) and favourite B&M in this park!   We grabbed another of many soft drink refills from the Coadter’s Diner before making a move to the further North Coasters in this park. The amount of free style refill and drinks choices out here is remarkable and offers considerably better choices than back home. Jamie Oliver is one of many reasons why the UK doesn’t get nice things anymore! We did Corkscrew, another of several Arrow coasters at the park. Despite its age I found it surprisingly enjoyable.  Magnum XL was our next ride. In 1988 This beast was the tallest coaster in the world at 205ft tall, until it’s slightly taller sister the Big One stole it!     I found my first ride on the Magnum noticeably jerky and uncomfortable almost to the point I proffered The Big One. It’s a good job I didn’t just do it once! It’s still popular too.    Gemini followed. This is an interesting attraction in that it’s a racing coaster that looks like a woodie in places but is actually a steel coaster. It’s height implies it’s a thrill coaster, but it mostly rides as a thrilling family ride.  Whilst Gemini may not have the frills and excitement as other coasters at the park, it perfectly serves it’s purpose as a fun and exciting ride. The racing element here likely helps enhance this factor. After Gemini we raced over (pun intended) to Cedar Creek Mine Ride, the final of C’s Arrow quintet. This is the second oldest coaster operating at the park, which you can tell from old fashioned restraints style which are manually functioned by ride staff. It also occupies one of the larger footprints too. Aside from it’s historical significance, there isn’t anything remarkable about this ride as nothing really sticks out for it. Least the location is nice though. Still beats El Diablo. We took a quick break from our coaster and soft drink hoarding by going on Sky Hawk, the park’s S&S Sky Swing. This was honestly tonnes of fun and swings much higher and longer than Rush indefinitely. Valravn would serve as our final ride and Cred of day one. We joined the queue just before it closed and spent most of the time chatting an American family who seemed quite friendly; I found most people during my trip out there friendly. Timing it right (when staff asked for a three), we finally boarded what would be our final B&M we hadn’t done at the park.  Although Wise and Martin seemed to like it, I came off feeling like something was missing. Like key wow factor moment. It probably didn’t help being asked to randomly swap seats with another rider.    Despite it’s height, the drop felt empty and I think the reason for this is largely down to the lack interaction. Whilst CP isn’t a park that specialise in theming, they could have at least added a tunnel or something as that alone would already be a noticeable improvement both to the ride in appearance and experience. Don’t get me wrong it’s not a terrible coaster (far from it). But I just feel I csme off it feeling a little disappointed and wanting more and preferring Oblivion to it despite being a longer ride. I think the second half is generally better on this one! Least Yukon Striker actually has an impressive first drop! Now your probably thinking I’m missing out on an important ride here. Something that you can’t help but notice really impacts the park’s ride selection and skyline. The answer Unfortunate is No. we didn’t go on Woodstock Express on day one! Oh, and Top Thrill Dragster was down due to some cable replacing work, so looks like we’ve been spited a Cred here. Or have we?    End Of Part One      

A cryptic wheel cover and demolition of a bridge, followed by markings on the ground.  A pIt of concrete footers.  Then a coaster.  Even after watching the project for well over two years, it feels surreal standing next to the twisted metal track of Icon and seeing the trains swish around what was previously a lake.
 
Visible from many locations within the park, Icon makes its presence known simply by being there.  It may not be tall, but in terms of land covered it’s HUGE.  First impressions heading up the ramp seeing the Immelman looming up ahead are impressive, but the approach from the ride entrance side is the money shot.  It’s such an impressive sight with the huge entrance structure, glorious soundtrack playing and the smart gold trains whizzing around you and other rides at the park.
 

 
The queue line is fantastically landscaped with amazing vantage points to watch the ride, and whilst relatively short manages to catch various sections of the ride’s amazing soundtrack.  It really is sublime standing there, hearing the launch audio, and seeing a train full of excited riders slowly exit the station before the train is hurled through swirling mist and into the tunnel.
 

Yes, they have finished the fence now!
 
Decorated in style, the ride features various elements of theming such as a garden with named posts of those involved in the project, a small water feature, mist effects and a nice entrance area/viewing platform.  Given that Pleasure Beach is an amusement park at heart, I have to give them credit for putting so much effort into the overall experience of Icon, it has really paid off and creates a unique atmosphere around the ride.
 

 
Entering the station, the soundtrack hits you like a ton of bricks and does a great job of building the hype - alongside the class decoration, lighting and mirrors, it’s one of the best atmospheres I’ve ever felt inside a coaster station.
 
But… is it any good to ride?
 
 
The excitement builds as you dispatch from the station, with the launch audio gradually getting louder before launching you towards the mist-filled tunnel with “IIIIIIIIIICON” ringing in your ears.
 

 
Flying through the misty tunnel, an almost dream-like moment of obscured vision is followed by entering the top hat element completely disorientated, before cresting the hill and being treated to one of the best airtime moments I have ever known on a coaster.  On the back, you crest the hill slowly before being thrown out of your seat on the way down, whilst there is some ejector as you crest on the front.
 

 
Diving through the garden for the first time, you enter the inclined loop before swerving to the left, right, then diving underneath Steeplechase and Big Dipper.  Whilst I didn’t feel the near-misses on-ride as much as I expected, it’s an engineering masterpiece to fit the track there and the S-turns provide some fun forces before you are taken back over Steeplechase into what I found to be one of the best elements of the ride.
 
The heart-line roll offers a completely different sensation to the beginning of the ride, creating a stark contrast.  From fast-paced ground hugging turns, you are taken into some ridiculously comfortable hang-time – the amazing Mack restraints are really used to their potential here, allowing you to hang freely (but comfortably) for a second before “catching” you and throwing you into two small and sudden moments of airtime.  Leading you back through the tunnel of mist, I found the two small airtime hills followed by the second launch to be a highlight of the ride.
 

 
With the station and surroundings a blur as you fly past them, you enter the Immelman.  It’s quite something seeing The Big One essentially turn-over, and the element is a lot of fun at the front – at the back, it’s quite simply one of the most insane moments on any coaster.  You’re taken from ascending what feels like the start of a loop to hang-time, then ridiculous “sideways-airtime” as you come down the drop, before being thrown into a steeply banked Stengel dive and then into the turn.  This is one of the perfectly executed moments of Icon.
 

 
Coming out of the over-bank and into the airtime hill, you are thrown yet again out of your seat before twisting onto your side into a tight helix.  I found the force to be decent here, with a good view of the theming if you’re sat on the left-hand side of the train.  Forcing you out of your seat yet again, you twist over to the right to take a majestic dive over the ride’s entrance area before entering yet another unique element.
 

 
Wonky-airtime.  Yep, Icon has it.  You’re taken into an off-banked airtime hill, giving the impression that you’re going to be thrown into the totem poles (a fantastic throwback to the park’s past for those who remember, btw!) before meandering into the high-five element and slithering back into the brake run.  The high-five element felt quite weak to me; it’s very clever and a true engineering feat, but it didn’t have the impact or sensation I thought it would as a ride experience… although with the Icon exit music becoming audible as the train hits the brake run, I soon forgot about that!
 

 
After my initial rides on Icon I was unsure but having let the coaster properly warm up, it has become a firm favourite.  To me, it’s the definition of a perfect coaster; it’s long, has a number of unique elements, isn’t inversion focused (yet still has two perfectly placed and impactful inversions in the layout) and the airtime is second-to-none.  Every element serves a purpose, and the ride is taken so comfortably yet isn’t afraid to throw you around.  The decoration is excellent, and the soundtrack is pure bliss; easily some of the best audio I have ever heard at a theme park, The Notable Stranger has done an excellent job.
 
My concerns going forward are the maintenance of audio systems, and effects; the train lighting and mist has already proved unreliable, and the ride has only just been open a week.  Pleasure Beach are historically not the best with keeping audio systems in check, but I hope Icon changes this trend. 
 
Thanks for reading, a few more photos below
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
Icon is incredible, and offers something that the UK has been missing for some time.  Pure quality. 

Wicker Man.  I think it’s fair to say that I had very mixed feelings during the construction and build-up process for this ride.  Whilst I was happy to see a new wooden coaster finally grace the UK line-up, I had reservations about how good it would be; there weren’t any huge drops in the layout, so would it pick up enough speed to be thrilling?
 
On approaching the ride, the excitement builds from the moment you see the hugely impressive Wicker Man structure and entrance signage come into view with the music droning in the background.  I couldn’t quite believe what I was seeing – it’s such a compelling sight, nothing looks out of place and everything just ‘works’.
 

 

 
Moving into the queue-line, the design is fantastic with so many vantage points for the ride – small items of theming are expertly placed creating brilliant photo opportunities.  Throughout queuing there are many good places to watch the coaster from, and it’s so pleasing to see that everyone seems to be enjoying it.  I really like how the smoke effect is pulled around the corner by the train after exiting the second tunnel, in particular.  Being surrounded by the roar of a wooden coaster combined with the soundtrack, theming and screams of joy is really something quite special.
 

 

 
Onto the preshow, I enjoyed this and found it delivers a lot in a short space of time.  The transition is clever and the show lasts just long enough to stay interesting whilst not becoming a burden after a few rides.  I found the theatrics and changes in atmosphere particularly impressive, however it was a shame on one of the rides I had that the automatic doors at the back of the room kept opening.  Exiting into the station, the lighting and dispatch/unload audio keeps the theme consistent and is very impressive.
 
With the thematic elements done to a very high standard, how well would the coaster itself hold up?  After five rides on two separate occasions, I absolutely love it.
 
Dispatching out of the station, the pre-lift section is very Nemesis Inferno-esque (with the mist-filled tunnel) and sets the scene for the ride very well.  Ascending the lift hill, the views of the ride are excellent and the audio helps to build anticipation throughout.
 

 
The first corner and drop help to build up the speed, and the tunnel adds a level of disorientation, as you exit already facing the ground.  The section that follows is truly sublime; after going over the second hill in the tunnel, you emerge blinded from the light to be thrown (yes, THROWN) first to the right, then to the left and into a ground-hugging turn.  This is my absolute favourite section of the ride; the forces are much better than I expected and the transition from right-to-left is just so much fun.
 

 

 
Diving through the Wicker Man structure and up into the turnaround, this offers a nice view of the queue-line and theming structure before hitting the two small bumps (which are much better than they look!) and then plunging to the right through the structure into yet another fantastic and unexpected sideways-banked drop.
 

 
I found that the flat corner goes a long way to making the ride feel longer, as it gives you time to process the elements you’ve been through before heading into the next section.  The straight drop which follows provides a nice feeling of weightlessness, however on the back row at the end of a rainy day there was some incredible airtime there!  Following this is a sharp right-hand-turn through the structure, before turning left under the lift-hill and into the brake run leaving the clank of the lift chain ringing in your ears.
 

 
After some time to think it through, I can say in full confidence that Wicker Man is genuinely one of the best roller coasters I have ever ridden.  Firstly, it’s the first time Alton have delivered a fully complete theme under Merlin, with no obvious corners cut and nothing looks out of place.  I could nit-pick, but it's the best we've had in the UK for years - so I won't.  The coaster itself is great fun and is a superb example of a wooden coaster.
 
Combined, it’s a masterpiece.
 
My only concerns going forward are the reliability issues the ride is currently having, and maintenance of effects.  The fire, smoke and audio add a lot to the overall experience, and with the fire already broken, I only hope that Alton can manage to maintain them to a high standard.
 
Thanks for reading, a few more photos below.
 

 

 

 

 

 

 
Wicker Man = AMAZING. 

Okay I know its only April but fu** you I'm writing this review.
 
So the London Bridge and Tombs is an attraction that has always been on my radar- whether it be the rave reviews from Scaretour or walking past it when the Dungeons was down the road.
So after a trek down to London I thought I might as well experience it for myself- does it compare to The Dungeons?
(apologies for these straight outta snapchat photos )
 


 
**Mild Spoilers**
 
 
The London Bridge Experience
So after a somewhat overly long intro video- you are ushered into the London Bridge Experience.
Overall I found this experience to overall be well themed, well acted, well scripted, and educational- but sadly I feel like a lot of scenes and rooms lacked the crescendo or 'oomph' that the Dungeons has.
 
For example there is a scene in a pub here which the landlord discusses a bunch of murders which references Jack The Ripper. You then hear a scream to which you are ushered out of the pub by the landlord to find a corpse. But then after you see the bloody mannequin- you abruptly move on to the next scene.
This scene in particular had a lot of tension and it constantly felt like something big or Dungeons esque would happen- but it doesn't.
I felt like they really could of added some more dramatic reveal to seeing the bloody mannequin too- we really just walked past it.
 
This was a issue for many scenes- in particular 'the fight verses the Romans' scene had a great script and seemed to be building up to something jumpy- but then it just kinda fizzled out and next minute we were on the next scene..
 
I do have to give credit for some scenes within the experience though- there is a huge scare involving a large moving animatronic that made me jump out of my skin towards the beginning of the experience.
I also really enjoyed the incredibly disorientating spinning tunnel towards the end- it was even worse than the one at Tulleys!
 
I think London Bridge with some more special effects could easily match the Dungeons- but for now I think it really lacks the 'oompth' and the finales of The Dungeon's scenes.
Despite that though- the theming is brilliant and perhaps even greater than The Dungeons. The acting was also top class and the groups were much more intimate than the 30+ groups that The Dungeons has.
 
The Tombs
After nearly throwing up from the spinning tunnel you are warned about the intense scare attraction that awaits you- after a photo opportunity and a intro video, you enter the lifts..
This lift scene built up tension perfectly and the lift had some nice special effects to make it feel like you were actually going down!
 
Once out of the lifts, you form a conga line and you enter the main maze.
The main maze itself was nicely themed and had a huge variety of scenes.
 
A hospital, a Chop Shop style room, a prison style room, and even a clown section- you name it, its in The Tombs.
The maze overall has tonnes of variety within its long layout- I never quite knew what the next room would bring.
 
The acting was brilliant throughout, with actors using various hiding spaces to come out of nowhere or harass us.
My only problem was there was quite a few rooms that were sparse on actors- but the theming and animatronics kinda made up for it.
 
Overall The Tombs was a long and varied scare attraction that I think really made the trip worth it.
 
Conclusion
Overall I think The London Bridge Experience and Tombs are both well themed and acted experiences- though if you want a educational and witty trip back in time I think The Dungeon's is a much more polished and superior experience- though if you want to get sh** scared then The Tombs makes the trip down to Tooley Street more than worth it.
The groups in both The Bridge and The Tombs are also much more intimate so you don't have to deal with the overcrowding that The Dungeons has.
 
Anyway sorry for the six month early post 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

When it comes to reviewing something, I try to be as honest, straight-talking and truthful as I can to the reader because above anything else, integrity to me is the most appreciated value I admire in someone when I am seeking for advice with their opinions. That way, if I decide to pluck down my own money, time and effort on something, I can be assured there is nothing being kept hidden when trying the product myself and therefore, trust can be built.
 
I believe this first paragraph needs to be put at the very start of this review because after trying Wicker Man for the first time, I want to be as honest as I possibly can in what you are about to read. There are presently a lot of exaggerated claims, promises and expectations being thrown around about this coaster at the moment by various people and I refuse to fall into this category, so everything below is exactly what it is with no filter in place, for good and bad.
 
Now onto the ride itself. I’ve been moderately quiet during the construction of Wicker Man these last several months despite the constant updates, advertising, drone footage and leaked name ages before, primarily because time and time again, I have stupidly built false promises and expectations with a lot of Merlin’s recent investments these last several years. Promises which inside I knew they couldn’t deliver but still believed in nonetheless and as a result, I have been scarred by it all and have a real grudge against the majority of Merlin attractions that have been built across the parks from 2014 onwards. To be blunt, I approached Wicker Man with a pessimistic view from the day it was announced until the day I finally rode it.
 
Wooden coasters for me are something special; special in a way that cannot be described easily. Because despite not having fancy elements, being the fastest or tallest or the most amazing coasters out there, they tend to be underestimated a lot of the time and can really surprise you with how great they are. I’ll never forget that first ride on Megafobia at Oakwood, Wales back in 2010 where it left be stunned. Also quite recently sitting on the back row of Balder at Liseberg, Sweden in 2017 and being shocked and amazed by the extreme forces you go through, especially down the first drop after the lift hill. It certainly is an amazing feeling!
 
So whilst I was pessimistic given Merlin’s track record for the last 4 years, coupled with their management of special effects, I was secretly all this time really excited to try Wicker Man and didn’t want to jump to any conclusions too quickly and then regret what I said all the time before trying it (e.g. - Derren Brown’s Ghost Train). I simply didn’t fall for any of it this time and approached the coaster with an open mind for a change.
 
But my word, I’m really glad I did that now, as this coaster has been quite a surprise!
 
To begin this thorough and in-depth review, I’d like to begin with the setting and scenery of the attraction which will be the first thing every person sees upon experiencing this ride:
 
APPEARANCE AND SETTING:
 
When I was at the park’s fireworks display last year and finally saw the majority of the track constructed, I can’t lie, but it did look quite impressively large and dominant through those window fences. However, when seeing it fully constructed and running, the thing looks wonderful!
 
Everything about this ride looks brilliant. The track is moulded against the landscape very well, the rumbling sound of the trains really dominates the area similar to Nemesis, the audio sounds superb and there was a huge amount of buzz and excitement flowing through the entire area on it’s opening ceremony day. Another nice touch was seeing a wooden coaster fresh, because I’m so used to seeing wooden coasters where the wood has faded into a dull, grey colour that it was nice seeing it all looking and even smelling fresh and yellow for once! As silly as this sounds, it made a nice change for once.
 
The entrance plaza and queue line is nicely routed, landscaped and constructed too. Seeing loads of fire beacons filling the plaza with real fire used, coupled with the nicely themed entrance and bizarre-looking vegetation to match the rest of the ride’s theme made the whole area feel more permanent, complete and designed well, unlike the ugly-as-heck-yellow-box-of-an-entrance The Smiler uses. A small touch I liked in the queue were the little bits of theming present used for lighting and signs as you progress nearer and nearer to the station. Unlike the typical laminated, dull-as-anything printed signs we see so often across other rides across Merlin, these were all shaped and sculpted to match the theme, which was a nice detail I appreciate the team for doing. Also, having a queue line for the most part which is linear and doesn’t have endless cattle pens like Smiler and Rita was another touch I appreciated, plus, the queue oddly seemed wider too compared to most other rides.
 
For the landscaping, this is a mixed bag. Whilst some areas surrounding the coaster have clearly been worked on with new plants and turf mats installed, others have not and look as though they are still in the middle of being constructed with dirt and soil everywhere. Also, something I wished the team did before opening this ride was to clean the concrete supports holding the track in place because they were filthy all over and looked quite off-putting, especially in contrast to the freshly installed wood for the track. If the park can clean these concrete supports using a jet washer as well as laying down turf or giving the remaining sections of the area some green grass, I believe it will neaten the overall profile and presentation of the ride, since it was a bit mixed in several places and could have looked better. Just a smaller detail compared to everything else, but an important one regardless.
 

 
THE WICKER MAN EFFIGY
 
Always knew from the moment the name was announced back in January 2018 this figure of the Wicker Man himself would be the centre of all attention and man, I can see why after finally seeing it in-person as it looks really lovely! The scale of this effigy is huge and very nicely themed and detailed, so much so that I would put it up there with something we would expect to see at Phantasialand. OK, I know that might be an over-exageration here, but that’s what I gathered after witnessing it for the first time.
 
The wood looks genuine even though it isn’t, especially around the shoulders, the shape and design of the two-faced head looks impressive and the attention-to-detail used even for the small holes the train passes through three times was looked after which was a nice surprise. Plus the amount of mist (yes, water mist, not smoke) used really filled the inside of the figure and the holes through him, which was especially great when passing through on the train! Also, I loved how there were audio effects used every time a train passes through which sync with the real fire effects.
 
Probably the best thing about this effigy is when you are passing through the second time after making the banked u-turn, because the position of the track which passes straight through his chest is perfect! The brief view you get when passing straight through the centre of his chest is ideal, especially coupled with the mist and fire effects used on the shoulders. It captures your attention and is a really effective head-chopper effect, especially with the small bump present in the track just before passing through. Very effective and convincing effect used!
 
However, I have to admit, whilst it looks pretty when you see it in real-life, it will not be as impressive up-close as opposed to a distance of at least 20m I theorise. The reason for this is because those fire effects used inside the figure are actually just TV screens playing a loop of some generic flame behind a black background used when filming, plus, the resolution of these displays are not that great because up-close, you can see the pixels used and cameras can pick up some artificial flickering from them, similar to when filming Thorpe Park’s entrance screen on any smartphone or camera.
 
Another detail that aggravated me was the size and position of the fire used on the shoulders, because when standing on the ground, you barely even see the fire used when they are lit normally, but it’s only when they are enlarged in size whenever a train passes through you can see them properly for only a few brief seconds. Not a major issues, but be aware the flame effects might not be as impressive in real life compared to what they look through promotional videos and pictures.
 
But besides from that, the effigy is a really nicely and detailed piece of theming which I welcome being there for the coaster and can really enhance the experience, even though it has some flaws when seeing it up-close.
 

 
AUDIO
 
When it comes to hearing audio on an attraction, to me, this is absolutely crucial to get right as it’s a very effective piece of theming to any ride regardless of how small or big it might be, plus, it gives it an atmosphere and defines it’s character. Rides like Chiapas, Taron, Helix and The Smiler I simply wouldn’t love as much if it weren’t for their audio in all honesty, so the audio on Wicker Man had to be loud, dominant and catchy for me to appreciate as a whole much more and thankfully, this is the case!
 
This is probably the biggest secret weapon of the coaster, because I noticed across all areas of the ride from the plaza/entrance, start of the queue line, end of the queue line, baggage/pre-show room, station and track sections there were various different pieces of audio playing from the lovely guys at IMAscore.
 
Upon seeing the effigy around the entrance and plaza, the first track you hear sounds very happy and charming similar to Klugheim village at Phantasialand, which gives the impression to riders the whole ride itself has a welcoming theme to it all, but as you progress through the queue, you begin to notice the tune, pitch and instruments used changes and the closer you get to the station the darker it begins to sound as you get ever-closer to the baggage room. After walking through the entire queue, I am certain it’s done in a similar way to Big Top’s audio where there are at least 3 variations of the same 30 minute track, only each one has a darker and more unsettling theme to it.
 
It’s once you are inside the building itself the more vocal sections of the audio are used similar to the snippets found online. Drums are used, the tune changes and a more honestly scary-sounding track plays inside the buildings amongst the darkened rooms. In the station especially where whilst the audio is lower in volume compared to outside, that coupled with the burning wood effect creates a really unsettling theme inside as though something bad is about to happen.
 
A really excellent thing the park have taken advantage of is in the badge waiting room for the pre-show and station, the doors and train dispatch have themed audio playing alongside the use of lighting, which creates a really exciting atmosphere for riders and builds up a lot of anticipation! When the train dispatches, a loud roar of drums starts and the lighting in the station begins to change and flicker, similarly to how the dispatch looks on Nemesis Inferno and Black Mamba, only this time, much more effectively I would say! Same for when a train arrives back into the station too which has is timed to when the train stops on the brake run and people disembark.
 
Just in case that wasn’t enough, even the darkened waiting tunnels once the ride finishes have themed audio matched with smoke and light effects inside, which means even the wait caused by the stacking of the trains is looked after which I thought was great! Also, the lift hill has timed audio with the train too, making the excitement and anticipation even greater for the rider!
 
But in summary, Alton Towers and IMAscore have done a fabulous job with the audio management for this ride and should be commended for their efforts. Excellent job!
 
PRE-SHOW
 
I’ll keep this brief without giving away any spoilers for the viewer, but this was quite a nice addition made. The inside is shaped like a dome tent with pieces of theming all over the walls and flooring with a big projector screen right above you in front. All this scene does is give a little insight as to what the Wicker Man is, how it works and preparing you for what awaits ahead such as “The time has come for the wicker man to rise!”. The audio was nice and loud, the picture was sharp and the video was 60fps which was lovely to see.
 
However, I have to be honest here, this scene felt unneeded and superfluous and didn’t really add much to the experience at all, mostly because of how short it was to watch. Heck, it’s only just over a minute long. To me, this seemed more like another batching room to help reduce the number of people in the station, nothing much more.
 
A nice touch, but a needless one.
 

 
STATION
 
If you were to ask me “What is your favourite station for any coaster?”, I would have to give it to Wicker Man here. The station is great!
 
Unlike a lot I’ve been through, this one did not feel crammed or overcrowded inside as the platforms on each side of the track were nicely spaced out with plenty of room to move around whilst waiting/disembarking the carriage for a start. The next part being the lighting used inside as it wasn’t too bright or dull, but instead, nicely orange/red filtered, themed and lit perfectly inside to match the rest of the ride.
 
Also, I always look for details on the ceiling and walls for a station so that the entire room is consistently themed, unlike Thirteen with black cloth everywhere and Galactica with industrial machinery everywhere. In Wicker Man’s case, both of these areas have been attended to and look really nice with the wooden beams, themed drapes and flickering lighting on the walls for a fire effect. Glad finally to see a station where all areas have been looked after for once, yay!
 
But to summarise, the station for Wicker Man is really well done and everything about it is perfect from the lighting, to the audio, to the theming and the consistency. Excellent work here!
 

 
RIDE EXPERIENCE
 
Now onto the best part finally and goodness me, this was surprising! My first ride was incredibly lucky because I was allocated the very back two seats of the train on my first go and couldn’t be happier as it’s always the best. xD
 
The trains themselves look great, neat and fully detailed all over and they are quite comfy to sit in too. Haven never ridden a GCI woodie before, I was expecting something really uncomfortable such as Tomahawk, Stampida and even Balder to some degree, but the seating was wide, spacious and relaxing. I could easily move my feet and legs around a bit when on the train and didn’t in anyway feel cramped or pinned down in the restraint, meaning it was a really comfortable ride from start to finish. Quite pleasantly surprised by the comfort of those seats.
 
Once dispatched and the train immediately turns right under the building, you go through a massive jet of smoke (smoke, not mist this time) filled with lots of red lighting and sound effects of wood burning. It must be said, the amount of smoke which fills this room as you turn to exit the lift hill was huge and obscured your vision for the briefest of moments. Quite liked this actually and hope it stays!
 
Once ascending the lift hill, the audio as mentioned earlier plays through the speakers and whilst you get a lovely view to the right of what awaits, I did find the lift hill incredibly slow which killed the great pace the ride had at the start exiting the station at a surprising speed. That coupled with the absolutely stupid bend on that lift hill made it worse. I’m probably the only person who has a problem with that bend on the lift hill as whilst it was needed due to the design of the layout, to me, that should have been designed better as it frankly looks dumb, especially when you climb it.
 
But once you reach the top where the tunnel lies, everything begins finally. What I didn’t expect on the back row was that left turn before the drop was declined slightly and as a result, was whipped round that corner incredibly fast which took me by great surprise! And even though the first drop is quite small, the airtime you get at the back going down it is quite big and was a great start to the ride!
 
Next was the bunny hop into the second tunnel and the S-bend which follows after and this was by far the best section. Because not only are you whipped again over the second hill, but because the S-bend goes downhill the whole way, you pick up some seriously high speeds down this section and the banking of the track can whip you around a fair bit on the back row! Not uncomfortably so, but enough to make the sudden changes in orientation a lot of fun with even more airtime moments! Without doubt the best section of the layout here.
 
Once passing through the effigy and performing the u-turn back through again, the speed does slow down a moderate amount here noticeably, but not enough to kill the pace thankfully. The bend is nicely shaped and isn’t too extreme for the riders until you reach the small hump as you race through the effigy again everything becomes faster once more. The small drop as you exit the 2nd pass-through of the figure has a bit of a noticeable jolt similar to Smiler’s 12th inversion, though nothing unpleasant, it just gives another small dose of airtime to the rider!
 
From here onwards when the ride continues to make turns, smaller drops and twists, the train does slow down, but it still keeps a strong pace from start to end with more airtime hills and strong forces exerted on riders. Probably the weakest section of the layout is the flat and slow 180 degree turn you make just before dropping back down and passing through the figure again. To me, if this was banked or had a small dip in the middle similar to the way both of Smiler’s turns work for both lift hills, this could have made it a little more interesting.
 
Soon later, you reach the final brake run and the main section of the ride is over.
 
Something I need to mention is regardless of where you sit on the train, be prepared to get a little wet from the mist effects used in the effigy, especially when you pass through the holes. Apart from the mist, water is dripping from the jets used and will drip on you as a result, especially when you go through the 3rd hole. Nothing too major, but enough to notice!
 
You enter the darkened tunnels again with themed audio and more smoke effects before getting back to the station and disembarking to leave for the exit. The ride is now over.
 
If I’m to summarise the experience in one word, it would be “WOW!” Sure, it’s not a Megafobia or Balder killer, but compared to how it looks and what it’s actually like riding, this coaster has some serious surprises to it, the least being the several moments of airtime you get sitting at the back over various parts of the course! This coupled with the comfort of the trains made this a really fun and exciting coaster to try, even though the layout isn’t amazing. The pace is constant after the lift hill, it feels faster than what the statistics say, the interactions with the scenery and effigy are great and it’s just intense enough to allow those as little as 1.2m onto the ride without it being too much for them. Plus, even though the coaster has a few jerky moments that throw you around a bit, it wasn’t rough at all anywhere and didn’t try breaking the rider’s back like Stampida does.
 
SHOP
 
Again, the theming continues here too and the shop looks really nice too! Loads of detailed theming everywhere similar to DBGT’s one with theming across all the flooring, walls and ceiling and some of the merchandise was pretty nice. There was a hand-made figure of the Wicker Man available in the shop too, but for £3,000? Nuuuuuuuu thanks.
 

 
OTHER POINTS
 
Here are some other points worth mentioning when you try it:
 
• There is a baggage hold for this ride staffed by workers, but I thought Alton were eliminating all of them……? Very confused…
 
• If all three queues are full, the ratio will be 1:1:1 for main, fastback and disabled, so the waits can get incredibly and frustratingly slow at times.
 
• Be aware the lift hill is incredibly noisy when you stand underneath it.
 
• The shop is routed, so it may be difficult or cumbersome to reach one side of the shop to the other.
 
• When this ride breaks down, be prepared to wait a fairly long time. Over an hour was spent sending the trains round when it broke down with full and empty trains going round constantly. I believe the ride was experiencing weight issues, hence why 3/4 rows were running round empty all afternoon.
 
• The on-ride photo camera is at the bottom of the first tunnel drop straight after the lift hill.
 
• Be aware there is a major design flaw with placing the camera here. Honestly shocked nobody has picked this up yet, but the smoke in the 2nd tunnel if blown in front of the camera can make your on-ride photo look very strange with a weird ghost effect. Below is this issue me and Martin ran into, so you have a 50:50 chance of this appearing. Didn’t appreciate this after waiting 2+ hours and making it our only ride on it that day:
 

 
CONCLUSION
 
If you have read all of what I’ve put above, you probably most likely realise by now despite going in with low expectations, pessimism and serious doubts given Merlin’s recent track record, this ride has honestly surprised me on a level I haven’t witnessed before. It’s surprised my because during all the construction stages, apparent rumours the first drop was re-profiled by John Wardey, negative stabs from enthusiasts and the constant, vacuous marketing WORLD FIRST claims I was seeing for this thing, Wicker Man has delivered on being what I can only describe as a superb family coaster. It really is!
 
Whilst I still have some doubts and questions of the theme behind this ride for a family coaster, especially if one has seen the films or does research behind the whole sacrificial belief behind it, the park have done a superb job with theming the ride as a whole and must be given credit for it. The smallest of details have been looked at, especially in the station, the audio matches it perfectly and everything feels complete and not half-finished like Smiler still does today.
 
But my biggest concern is regarding the special effects used. Whilst for now they might all be working great with no flaws whatsoever, I seriously and honestly cannot see this lasting too long. It won’t be long before the sprayed mist on the effigy starts to degrade similar to The Marmaliser’s The Giggler leg, or 1+ of the screens displaying a flame inside breaking, or even one of the fires on the shoulders breaking. I might be sounding paranoid here, but for a coaster that for the most part lives on the promise of the effects working on this figure, that is incredibly risky of Merlin/Alton. Hopefully I’m proven wrong over time, but I still think eventually they will begin to break one bit at a time.
 
But besides that, if the park can get the coaster to run perfectly with no hiccups regarding the operations and technical faults it has, maintain all the effects to a working standard every day beyond 2018, they could be onto a real winner here. 
 
Already I say this is their best family coaster without a doubt at the park, but I wouldn’t go as far as saying this is the best coaster in the country like some YouTubers and vloggers have said. It’s still loads of fun regardless and is a solid addition, but all I’ll say is don’t expect anything amazing here. Instead, expect to be surprised by it and really enjoy it for what it offers because it executes at being a fun, enjoyable woodie really well!

Just to add a little more to this review, besides from the masses of pictures above, below is a short video showing many off-ride views, including a naughty sneak of the pre-show. Don't worry, that section is only 5 seconds long!
 
 
So in summary, Wicker Man to me is a solid addition to Alton Towers, deserves credit for all the teams who put it together and should go down really well with it’s target audience. Heck, if it gets a 3 hour queue just from one day, I can only begin to imagine how big they’re going to get this summer!
 
Wicker Man - 8 / 10 

Something Stupid: Thorpe Half Marathon 2018
 
How far would you go, as an enthusiast, to build your collection of Theme Park tat?
 
...
 
Take out a Wonga loan to cover the cost?
Break up with your long term partner so you can free up some space?
How about run a half marathon to earn it...?
 
Well, last Sunday saw me do Something Stupid as I found myself running the 21 kilometres of the 2018 Thorpe Half Marathon, all in an attempt to nab the jazzy coaster-themed medal bestowed upon those who manage to get over the finish line.
 
And here for you, dear reader, is how I got on...
 

 
Thorpe Half Marathon 2018
 
The Thorpe Half is now in its second year, having enjoyed a successful - if wet - debut in 2017. Unfortunately as it's held in February, the park is closed, so the only real connection to Thorpe Park is that it starts and ends in the car park; there's no sprinting past Stealth and dashing around Depth Charge. What it does have to offer however is a pleasant run through the Surrey countryside, along a relatively flat-profile road-closed course - perfect for those chasing a personal best.
 
I was, it must be said, not chasing a personal best. I was just in it for the medal.
 

 
So, first things first. Sunday 25th February 2018 was cold. Bloody cold. The event organisers recommended that participants arrived at the car park by 07:45am, to allow good time before the race started at 09:00am. At 07:45am on Sunday 25th February in the Thorpe Park car park, the mercury was touching -1 degrees C.
 
But this hadn't deterred anyone! Indeed, the car park was busier than the average in-season Saturday when I arrived, and the place was buzzing with excited, committed runners. Many of whom seemed happy to be out in nothing more than vests, lycra, and shorts. In -1 degrees.
 
At this point I must admit that I took a large gulp and wondered what on earth I was doing here - and this wouldn't be the last time this particular thought crossed my mind.
 

 
It's also worth saying that I wasn't prepared for doing this. At all.
 
The fault is squarely mine, but I had done such minimal training beforehand that it doesn't even really merit the name "training". Since I booked a place at the event back in November, I had managed a grand total of two 3 mile runs on the roads around my house. Two. And on one of those I very nearly threw up at the end of it.
 
I am not a runner. I don't especially enjoy it, so, at best this was going to be a struggle. But there was only one way to get that medal...!
 
At this point I decided I'd take my mind off the impending challenge by having a nose around the site.
 
First up was a mosey on over to the park entrance - which looked very bare without an actual sign there! Does this happen every season, or might we be about to get a new sign design? And whilst they're at it, the paintwork could do with a good looking over too...
 

 
Alas I was allowed to go no further, because this sign had both red writing and underlining - doubly authoritative.
 

 
Thanks to my trusty zoom lens though, I could peek in a little closer...
 
...but there wasn't really much to see.
 

 
The Annual Pass building seemed to be getting a good dose of TLC though. Looked like it was having a new roof fitted, given the scaffolding.
 

 
Given the red underlined signs everywhere, it was pretty clear that the toilets by the entrance were out of bounds and out of action.
 
So bring on the portaloos!
 
Unfortunately, you can never have enough portaloos, and in this case, there weren't enough portaloos. Queueing is par for the course at any Theme Park, but queueing in sub zero temperatures is even less fun.
 

 
A quick look over the back of the bogs revealed very little of interest - although Zodiac standing stationary in a half-upright position looked quite strange! There was no visible work being done to X / WDTR.
 
However, it is photos such as this one that make me think how lucky we are to have a park as pretty as Thorpe in our country.
 
Thorpe Park is rarely praised for looking good. But with bright blue skies and deep blue lakes top-and-tailing it, it can't be denied that this is a sweet view. Reminded me strangely of a (very) mini Cedar Point...
 

 
OK - back to the action. The event organisers had done a great job with the central runners' village area, which contained a Cookie Bar, Coffee Stall, Massage Beds, Medal Engraving, a bunch of running-related retailers...
 

 
...and a stage!
 
Pictured here are the Epsom Rock Choir, who were singing with gusto despite the bitter cold. Did I mention that it was cold?
 

 
08:45am. Nearly game time. I got changed into my kit, which naturally featured a vintage Thorpe t shirt, and made my way over to the start area.
 

 
There were nearly 2,000 runners taking part in today's race, including many that had been bussed in by their local running group for the event.
 
The "why am I here?" thought flickered across my mind once more.
 

 
And we were off!
 
The route took us past the annual pass building, down towards the car park entrance, and off to the left.
 

 
Geek Photo #1 - the Protecting The Magic sign.
 
Do you know the Six Spells for Safety?
 

 
The route continued to track along the Staines Road, through the backstage areas of the park. Lots of industrial-looking buildings and infrastructure.
 

 
And then, behold! Geek Photo #2 - I spy nostalgia!
 
These look to me as if they've been saved from Chief Ranger's Carousel (RIP), which is great. But what will the park do with them?! Hopefully not leave them to rot...
 

 
OK, back to the race. The course had kicked us out of the Thorpe Park grounds at around 1 mile, on to Norlands Lane, then Coldharbour Lane, past Thorpe Farm (RIP), and up to the Thorpe Bypass.
 
At this point, my lack of fitness was really kicking in. The Sunday morning jolly at the Theme Park had suddenly turned very real, and I was wheezing after just 2 miles.
 
What didn't help was this section of the course, which involved running half a mile up one half of the road, only to turn around and run straight back down the other half. Sigh.
 

 
On the plus side, some great views of the M25. Oof.
 

 
But to be fair, much of the route was through very pleasant countryside, and if I'd been more fit it might have even been enjoyable.
 
As it was, it was a real mental effort to keep my head down, and keep moving. Just keep going. One step in front of the other. The coldness issue dropped away after 4 miles, because my body was generating so much heat.
 
I was overtaken plenty of times, and I had to just walk up anything resembling an incline. Spotify was a massive help.
 
The breakthrough for me came at about mile 10, where I realised that I'd made it around 75% of the course and that finishing was achievable!
 

 
At mile 12, I could start to see the tops of some of the rides peek over the skyline - wow. Never have I been more motivated by seeing the crest of Tidal Wave's lift hill!
 
My legs were properly turning to jelly, and the last pushes were really stop / start. But with a view like this, and the end in sight, I forced myself to go for a sprint finish for the last few hundred yards.
 

 
I threw myself over the finish line and doubled over, my chest burning and my legs on fire.
 
I'd done it!
 
2 hours, 1 minute, and 17 seconds of running later, and I'd completed the Thorpe Half.
 

 
And what was all this endeavour for?
 
Another addition to my collection of Theme Park tat! But what an addition it is.
 
Genuine blood, sweat and tears went into getting it, so I suspect it will remain amongst the more treasured of all the tat in my possession. It's a good looking, weighty medal and I'm proud to have earned it!
 

 
So, will I be running the Thorpe Half again next year to add another medal to my collection?
 
Absolutely not!
 
Immediately after the race my legs seized up to such an extent that I almost couldn't drive home. In the days following the event, my muscles were so sore that walking - anywhere - was a very real problem. And I later found I'd sprained my left foot along the course, and one of the toenails on my right foot had filled with blood and fallen off. Yuck. And did I mention the nipple chafing?
 
These injuries are, of course, preventable. As I said at the top of the piece, my running the Thorpe Half was Stupid. I certainly don't recommend following my lead and just running a Half Marathon in freezing temperatures with no prior training whatsoever in order to obtain a coaster-themed medal.
 
However, for those in better shape (or with a greater commitment to training) than I... it was a very well organised event. Why not give next year's a go?
 
~
 
Thanks for reading! Comments very welcome below.

Phantasialand is one of my favourite theme parks, it may not be the biggest park out there, but they certainly know how to mix a combination of attractions within remarkable footprints.
 
Just over a year following my first visit, I decided to make a return visit for Winter to see the park beautifully lit up and decorated for Christmas.

Berlin Street, a beautiful park entrance (at least once you get past the street). It borrows some elements from Main Street but also makes it’s own in many ways too, like the Chairswing at the end and Fun House (Hotel Tartúff).

This time I finally got the chance to go through the Tartúff. I can safely say it’s one of the craziest (and longest) Funhouse attractions I have experienced. It must’ve taken at least 15minutes to walk through it. Worth the wait too.
 

Last time around I was criticised for not mentioning enough love for Chiapas. Here goes, Yes that’s an enhanced entrance too which looks amazing.




Words can it describe just how impressive and magical this attraction is, it’s such a happy upbeat attraction that aren’t common enough in main park’s. There is nothing I can fault about this attraction, from it’s dark segments, backwards drops and pacing throughout. The disco room is by far one of the best inventions in modern attractions. They even play a Christmas variant of the main theme too. Sheer perfection.
 
Subtle yet Christmassy.

Talocan was running just as impressively and intensely as last time. Certainly a stunning beast and just as much a show as a ride. Not one for after lunch.

Speaking on lunch, we went back to Rutmoore’s (which does these amazing hearty meals). The eatery is certainly holding it’s own with decorations too amongst delicious food.

Savoury Crepes Yum.

Taron is still absolutely amazing (and narrowly misses the top spot to Helix). I just adore the ride’s empowering launches, floaty airtime and interaction with nearby buildings and pathways. It’s just as much a piece of art as much as a coaster and much more than a series of twists and turns for sure.
 

Taron in the sunset looks even more beautiful for sure.
 
Whilst Klugheim is still park’s latest addition (Taron’s 120 minute queues are proof), it won’t be too long before the park’s next investment (albeit delayed until 2019) arrives, Rookburgh. Replacing the old Atlantis Simulator (removed before my first visit), the new area looks to boast a steampunk style theme, a surprising move away from the park’s signature rock Styles. Rockwork to Phantasialand is perhaps what shipping containers are to Merlin.
 

Whilst I am (naturally) highly excited this new area, I am going to be quite controversial now and say I’m slightly disappointed the area’s headline attraction looks to be another coaster (opposed to a dark ride). The park lost a major dark ride (Silvermine) so Taron could be built and I would like to see them gain a modern (animatronic heavy) dark ride. I’m sure Fly though will still be fantastic though and rumours suggest it will have dark ride elements which is a start.
 



Far on the other side of the park (away from the glamorous Chiapas and Klugheim) lies the sad sorry ageing duo that are Temple and Hollywood. It’s almost difficult to believe they are in the same park. The left side does generally feel noticeably inferior to the right, but then again it’s literally towards the back of resident’s gardens. I wouldn’t complain living there tbh. 
 
Some say these will be the next attractions to be ripped out from the park (to makeway for the next park redevelopment). Whilst I won’t shed a tear when Nighthawk goes (a 10 minute confused journey in pitch black darkness), I will miss the Hollywood ride just a bit. The cave, jaws and Frankenstein scenes are my favourites in this sorry forgotten dark ride.
 


I’m probably in the minority but I actually really like Geister Riksha. Although it is one of the park’s oldest attractions (it’s 36 years old) the ride still feels like it holds a place even in modern Phantasialand. It certainly fits in more then Temple and Hollywood and feels better looked after too. I would rather the attraction extensively updated than ripped out entirely should China ever become redeveloped.

Spot the mistake.
 
Black Mamba was still amazing, Colorado crazy in the best way and Mystery Castle somewhat on the shorter setting. I enjoyed Maus Au Chocolate more this time which is great to see so much theming between the screens. Winjas Fear is definitely the better track. Bizarrely we had to enter through a back route to the entrances due to the main area playing home to a private function. 
 
Due to a national holiday, there was no music on the second day in many park areas until 6pm.
 





Phantasialand at night just looks absolutely spectacular, here’s the China Area. Whilst this area doesn’t House the park’s best rides it’s still one of my favourite areas in the park. That said I like 
pretty much all the areas of the park, the Fantasy not so much though.












Absolutely stunning. I don’t think these photos give the park justice.

The park at Winter also plays home to not one, but two night-time shows. The first one of these uses the park’s ice rink where numerous costumes performers actout. The loose plot basically comes down to something ruining Christmas and someone coming along saving it and ending on a firework finale.
 
The second show features a projection/fire show around the Chiapas ride plaza. Unfortunately no photography was permitted (Phantasialand are quite notoriously for being one of the stricter parks for this), so I wasn’t able to get any pics as I didn’t fancy getting shouted at in German.
 
I definitely enjoyed both shows for what they were but wouldn’t necessarily say they were out standing. They certainly weren’t terrible either. Perhaps my insufficient German didn’t help.

During my visit  I was very fortunate to stay at Hotel Lingbao, which was just stunning. I absolutely fell l in love with the place from it’s oriental styling to it’s quaint surroundings. Many of the items in this hotel are said to have actually come from China itself.


Would strongly recommend staying here if you can as it’s definitely worth it. Otherwise H+ is a suitable place if you are on a budget.
 

On the second day, we ventured (or should I say attempted) some cultural stuff in Cologne. Unfortunately this wasn’t as successful as hoped due to the Chocolate Museum being closed, but we did what we could out of it.

Cologne Lock bridge.

I also had my first Hard Rock Cafe experience here. I strongly enjoyed this (however Tomb thought it was average). Not sure how others compare.

Old Cologne. Sadly most of Cologne is modern brutal buildings. I’ll let Basil Fawlty do the explaining.

Tradional German Market, we actually visited two but I definitely preferred this one.

Random animatronic goodness. You can pay a euro for the duo to play a tune of your choice whilst drinking beer. 

I will end this update with Cologne Cathedral at night. 
 
If the closed season becomes too much, just book a winter trip to Phantasialand (opening hours vary). Merry Christmas!

If 2015 and 2016 were anything, empty would be the main word. I'd lost my coaster enthusiasm in a big way with only trips to the Disney parks across Florida, California and Paris being real highlights, their blend of capacity, good hours and efficiency being real draws. Any time I'd visited Merlin parks, I'd been frustrated with just how boring and badly run they had become. If I remember 2017 for anything, it would be the year that I got back into theme parks in a big way. It happened relatively late on in the year though, with only a trip to Disneyland Paris in February before the 25th anniversary celebrations begun.
 
I had been planning a trip with a few others for the beginning of April. This was the real kickstarter frankly. Parc Asterix, Nigloland, Holiday Park, Phantasialand, Movie Park Germany and Efteling on the agenda. This was a sublime trip with big parks and some fantastic rides. I could wax lyrical about Alpina Blitz at Niglo for hours. This to me is why Mack rides are so exciting. Intense, full of air time, perfect restraint systems and operations. It's been a long time since I've gone back again and again for a rollercoaster, let alone ride that same ride 10 times in a day. But Alpina Blitz is something special. This is why the idea of Icon at Blackpool is so exciting because Mack rides are rerideable and damn good fun.

 
Getting back on Oz'Iris, Black Mamba and Taron filled me with delight too. I always wondered if I had just over-rated Oz'Iris back when I first rode it but now I know that I hadn't. It's a genuinely good, unique inverter and the operations were absolutely perfect. Whilst Tonnere de Zeus was a bit disappointing this time around, I still maintain that Goudurix is just brilliantly awful. The thrill comes from wondering if you will survive.
 
I was still disappointed with Expedition Ge Force. I know why people like it and even get why this was rated Number one rollercoaster for years But we've moved on now and the stupid loading procedures and strictness of the ride holds it back in so many ways. Don't ride Alpina Blitz the day before is all I can advise. A ride that did surprise was Van Helsing at Movie Park. Wow. It's just a simple Gerstlauer bobsled but it was a big shock at how good it was. Very forceful cornering that compete with our own Rattlesnake at Chessington. The final park was Efteling which I wish we had longer at. It's back on the agenda for 2018 because I just didn't feel like I got the full Efteling experience. I really liked Baron 1898 for what its worth and the fairy dark ride was pure class from start to finish.

(side note, has anyone seen that seven rollercoasters you need to ride in 2018 video thats been going around? Why is Baron even on that list?!)
 
With that excitement over the next trip was IMO the best park in the world, Europa Park. It's no secret that I love Europa and every time I go it surprises and delights at every turn. It was weirdly quiet, managed to stay on Blue Fire twice in a row for example and we didn't really queue longer then 20 minutes for Arthur. We didn't know it was to be our last rides on EuroSat 1. It was running fantastically well. There's something about these older dark rides that just surprise at every turn. Wodan was also running fantastically. Every successive trip, it just seems to get better and better. Whilst I prefer Blue Fire, Wodan really is a great coaster. Coupled onto this trip was a few days at Paris to do all the 25th anniversary shows and to experience Hyperspace Mountain. Yuck. I don't really like it when a ride like Space Mountain has a theme chucked at it in such a haphazard way. The new trains are fine, but the use of Star Wars doesn't work here. New Illuminations is also not very good. There I said it. Stop trying to sell me your brands in such a blatant way. 
 
July time and it was off to Walygator for Monster. This is a pretty damn good B&M and whilst Walygator is a bit of a dump, Monster almost makes up for it.

 
One final trip to Paris happened (annual pass fun) and then November and off to Florida for a two week vacation. (lol America)
 
I'll first talk about Busch Gardens and Seaworld before descending into Disney. Do Busch and Seaworld ever get busy? For example, I've never queued longer then 10 minutes at Busch for anything. Walk on Montu, Cheetah Hunt is lovely but surely it shouldn't be that way in Florida. Suffice to say my feelings for certain rides has changed. I'm not sure what they've done to Kumba for example but it felt like the wheels were squares. It was running quite roughly throughout whilst was slightly disappointing as I'd previously loved it. Montu was fine but it really doesn't compare to Oz'iris, Monster, Nemesis. It's first half is fine, but the second half is just the train wondering around finding its way to the ending. Sheikra is excellent. So much force and air time throughout. I hear that it's hated in theme park circles and I really don't get why.

Cobras Curse was new last year and seemed to be having a lot of problems. We managed two rides and it was an okay enough ride but was a bit haphazard in its execution. 
 
Seaworld has three top quality rollercoasters and thats it. Luckily, these are B&M"s and three very strong ones at that. I'll start with Kraken (or Kraken Unleashed) which has been completely wrecked by VR. I'm not sure how the queue works anymore because the queue is closed off with a gate for the whole day and you have to ask to ride without VR. If you want VR you have to grab a virtual queue ticket. You could easily lie however and just queue normally and get straight on. But if you have a virtual queueing ticket you get priority onto the ride and can still just choose not to use the VR if you so desire. It was weird. The VR is fine but again it take away from the quality B&M experience you could be having instead. I'd never really liked Kraken that much before but I really enjoyed it this time around. It felt a bit rough around the edges and less smoother then before so maybe I like the more visceral experience.
 
Manta is excellent. The flyer is a bit of an under-rated gem in Europe to be honest and its a shame its never really taken off because from what I've seen and experienced, the flyer is the most intense B&M product available. I know some don't like pretzel loops but I absolutely adore them. MORE PRETZEL LOOPS PLEASE.

 
And finally... Mako. My experience with B&M Hypers is ashamedly lacking. I've only been on Silver Star and Shambhala so far so I was looking forward to Mako. A few things with this first. Most hypers have nine rows, Mako has seven so it looks really short and oddly shaped compared to the norm. I think this may explain why Mako is so much more airtimey and 'intense' compared to the others I've been on because the air time here was far more in the Intamin category of air time then the norm. The first half of Mako is excellent and surprisingly intense. It felt far more violent that I'm accustomed to from Shambhala for example which takes everything far more calmly. Mako isn't like this at all. What does take away its edge though is two trim breaks. WHY DO THEY DO THIS. Mako has two and the first nearly kills an air time hill, the second makes for a poorer ending then Mako really deserves. What Mako does do is deliver another excellent B&M for Seaworld who IMO have one of the strongest B&M line ups in the world. There, I said it. 

 
So Disney World. This was all really about Animal Kingdom frankly.  It delivered. There's a slight bit of animosity towards Pandora: The Land of Avatar and I get where that comes from. But it pales into significance of how incredible the area is. It's immersive, its full of little details and each walk through of the area is full of surprises. It's particularly amazing at night when the pathways come to life, full of colour, the plants shine, the waterfalls glisten. 

There are two rides in the area. Flights of Passage is the big one which gets 180 minute queues from the start, all the way to the end of the day. The other is Navi River Journey, a small boat ride that takes you through the land of Pandora. For all my money (and worth), I think Navi River Journey is the better ride. This goes slightly against the grain but to me, I prefer the physicality of River Journey with a particularly impressive animatronic. Flights of Passage only just justifies its long queue time and if I was being cruel, it's just a slightly more impressive Star Tours. There's no doubt that what Disney have done here is tried to put you on a journey, to wake you up to the damage being done to our world, albeit very subtlety. I just find the pre-shows over long and full of faff, impressive faff but faff nonetheless.
 
What does impress however is Expedition Everest at night. Disney are the masters at lighting and riding Everest in pitch darkness has to rate as one of my favourite rollercoaster experiences. Rivers of Lights, Animal Kingdoms new night-time show is impressive in its small scale. It's not like the castle firework shows where its essentially a Disney clip show. RoL is about how we live with animals and our bond with nature. I really liked it. 
 
Nothing to really report about Hollywood Studios and Epcot was it's usual retirement home of locals and retail. Frozen Ever After is fine if unremarkable but just about enough to justify its queue times. Happily Ever After, the new firework show at Magic Kingdom is fantastic. The Christmas event was fun but no way on earth am I queuing three hours to meet Moana.

 
And with that another theme park year is over. It's been one where I finally feel back into the theme park groove. Hope this wasn't to long a read and congratulations if you've made it to the end.
 

Afternoon all.
 
As most of you would know, I've been on this forum for a good 5 years, starting as a complete weirdo before blending in nicely as time went on. Some might say I've made a lot of contribution to many discussions and therefore have been a decent addition to the community. But most importantly I've met a lot of amazing people on here and therefore made a lot of new friends over the last few years.
 
However, in explanation to my lack of activity on here recently, I can confirm to those who don't know that I've suffered from depression for the past year. It's caused a lot of problems with some friends, through falling out or just leaving them altogether, it's caused my usual happy mood to take a nosedive and it's also affected my motivation to do a lot of things...including contributing to this forum.
 
...and that's why with a heavy heart I need to log out and take a break. Maybe for a month, maybe a year...maybe forever.
 
Not that anyone here has done anything wrong and I don't want to offend or upset anyone, but I feel like I've been on this site for so long that it's just started to get pretty dull for me, not just because my motivation's been in jeopardy but also over time I just think my interest for theme parks on the discussion side of things has faded and not a lot changes on here anyway. I'm also not saying I'm done with forum life because strangely enough I seem to be settling in well over on the Planet Coaster forums where, as players of the game would know, discussion is always on point over there with new content (ie. suggestions) flying in every day.
 
Right now I just want everyone reading this to know that this was never how I wanted things to turn out. If I were to take one thing from my time on this site it would be very simply that the majority of people on here have been some of the most amazing people I've ever met and I'm more than grateful for you guys. But then there are one or two people I've also met on here who started out great and then turned out to be fuel to the fire that is my mental health, one of those people once turned out incredible to me...and then for the past year we've fallen out repeatedly and now it's getting to the point where it's actually mentally crippling me. And I need a break from here to let this all blow over.
 
Hope everyone understands. It's been great being on here in the long run but I'll hopefully return when the maelstrom in my head clears.
 
Kerfuffle

I have intention of writing a bumper Halloween blog post with all the scare events I'm visiting. But to do this I should really catch up. So from a good 3 months ago, here is Efteling and their 13 hour day celebrating summer nights or something.

We were staying in the very nice Loonscheland Hotel. Our room was suitable for up to 5 people, not sure how comfy that would have been but for the 3 of us it was fine. Very nice bathroom, comfy beds. All good. We had a view of the service yard. Fresh breakfast each morning was great though with breads etc.


Climbing frames and goats made it even more fun!

1st July. First day of the festival and Symbolica opening. We used our ERT to wait for it to open

Pardoes (?) happy to get a ride about him

And the hoards arrive! We made the first batch of guests (should I brag about this?) and it's a very nice attraction. Fun for everyone.

Enough of this. Let's start the party! Commencing at 6pm, there was a parade

Which was basically of all the entertainment that'd be on offer that night

So each land had an offering and a timetable of different events. There was so much going on it was fab


And a marching band. Think there was one near the front too

So Ravelijn land had sword fighting

And other stuff. Was like a mini Warwick castle

We then went and got some food from this pop up stand area, was nice. And then these guys got involved, with an amazing repertoire of music they were much entertainment. As can be seen, Josh has a video  

Carnival had a random sing-a-long session.

The area by the rapids had these dancers and Flamenco

The Swiss (?) area by Bob had this guy, Steinbok. He was very popular, a comedic singing act. Had like a cult following it seemed.

Was a very nice atmosphere though

The best in my eyes were the street performers in Arabian Nights land.

This guy not giving ice cream (it was free if you could grab it from him)

Some magic act. And I think I might have been roped into buying an authentic rug?

Flying Dutchman had one of those not moving people who then does move.

And then it started to get dark!

Steinbok still holding a crowd!

And then the beautiful fountains. They had 3 shows on that night, Aquanara as normal, symphony 1 and symphony 2 which were different music configurations from the attractions around the park! We ended up seeing both symphony's and had an amazing night. Possibly one of the best theme park events I've attended. All included in your ticket price



It must have now been 11:20 but the park were in no rush to kick us out. So much so they had all the acts from throughout the park at the exit area saying bye to everyone, taking photos etc

The entrance is annoyingly large and doesn't fit in my photo.
 
Next time, Liseberg and the city of Gothenburg!

Havin a Nice in New York n tha' - Six Flags New England, Lake Compounce & Coney Island
 
Just come back from spending 2 and a bit weeks in America. Fantastic time to say the least.

 
Coney Island itself is a bit of a wreck. Picture a depressed, ran down Adventure Island, and then bunch a whole ton of Russian and mob gangsters there, and a touch of history. Voila, you got Coney Island.

 
The old parachute drop makes a real cool impression from the beach, can be seen all over the island.

 
Thunderbolt was odd.. I really enjoyed it but have come to learn that's a controversial opinion. The restraints are a bit of a red herring, on the drop you forget the 'ostrs' are just slack seat belts, so I fully thought I was going to fall out as we went over the top. 

 
Cyclone was really good fun. I'd recently shaved my head so I had a few shocked faces when I took my cap off to ride. It's cool seeing a 90 year old coaster run so well, and it had some proper air time to it.

 
New York is cool. I really like the city, there's so much to see. We went to a place called Do, where they sold cookie dough as if it was ice cream. That was really cool. Also, I recommend going up the rockefeller tower if you're looking to go up a tall tower. We did the freedom tower last time and it's not as good, on the rockefeller you're open to the elements and get the view of the empire state and the rest of the city much more nicely.

 
Went and crashed at my uncles place for the rest of the time, and he live right near by Lake Compounce, so it'd be rude not to ride boulder dash..

 
Rode a lot less well then I remembered, disappointingly. Still masses of fun and craziness, but there was absolutely nill air time for me this time. I remember being absolutely thrown out of my seat 3 years ago, but they've changed the trains a fair bit and the rides been retracked I believe, and its left it an a disappointing state compared to previously. That, and I've developed a better stomach for forces now. Maybe I'm immune. That's sad

 

 
Those premier off the shelf thingies are fun.

 
Spent a couple days catching waves on a tube on a nearby lake, and entered on a quest to get diabetes.

 
Then, to finish off the trip, off to Six Flag New England! I've heard horror stories about these parks, but I really liked it!

 
Headed straight to Wicked Cyclone. What. a. ride.

 
Pandemonium was alright I guess, but we quickly skipped over this and thunderbolt and headed to the world renowned Superman!!!...... which...was... an intamin pmbo.
First drop, incredible. Thereafter, utterly disappointing. Done this in a vary of seating arrangements throughout the day (the same with boulder dash) and nothing changed. I was actually really disappointed by this. Very little airtime throughout the hills, especially compared to the intensity of Expedition Geforce, it's little sister!

 
Fed up we headed over to the Joker. One of those icky S&S 4D things, which was actually a barrel of laughs. Really intense, good fun!

 
Mind Eraser. Now, this is an SLC with the new vekoma restraints, so I gave it a go. Regretted it instantly. Whilst the vests are extremely comfortable and prevent headbanging, I'm fairly sure the lap bar shook the nerves in my thighs so aggressively I'll suffer from some sort of muscle deterioration later in life.

 
Did my first floorless - Batman. It was alright, very B&My, with a super intense zero G. Other then that it was a bit meh. Only ride with bad ops throughout the whole trip. These Americans are efficient!

Grabbed some really expensive lunch, and then went and whored out Wicked cyclone for the rest of the day!

 
If there's one thing I got from SFNE it's an RMC cred that I am so thankful for. Before riding this I thought the stall looked stupidly awkward, and it makes a few noises that are... unsettling, but it's probably the smoothest, best flowing ride I've ever been on, and it was so, so intense. It has a small height restriction too which made me laugh, because 4 hours after our final ride I was still having blood rushes in my legs.

 
In the back row you truly get thrown over the drop, and dragged relentlessly through every inversion and air time hill. Soooo intense, so fun, and utterly ridiculous and unparalleled by any other cred I have. I absolutely fell in love with the back row. I'm already gagging to go again.

 
The upside down, side ways, inside out air time is unique, and brilliant. I urge everyone who can to get to an RMC. I am so eager and excited to try one of those big ones. They look cool.
 
Thanks for reading, here's a dodge ass video you can watch that I made. 
 

So I'm skipping Phantasialand because everyone knows I think it's the best and I'm behind on writing TRs and stuff.  So yeah, do excuse the delay and what will be rushed TRs, which will largely just be reviews of rides in no particular order of riding them...
 
Movie Park was a park I had reasonably low expectations about.  There wasn't many raved about, and any reviews of the park I had read always mentioned long queues, that their Fastrack was a saviour and people always having a sour taste in their mouth at the end of the day.  In fact the only real positives I had heard about the park was about its Halloween event.  These fears weren't helped when park close was extended from 5pm to 6pm, suggesting the park would be quite busy.  But for late June, it wasn't that busy, everything was manageable and it was a decent day.
 
Star Trek:  Operation Enterprise
The new-for-2017, triple Mack launch coaster was the big draw for finally deciding to pay MPG a visit.  Figuring it would have long queues, we headed their first - annoyingly the ride is basically the first thing you see at the entrance, but the ride entrance is in the middle of the park.  Fortunately we were first in the queue.  There was a few minute delay as we waited for a couple more test runs, but no issue.
 
The indoor queue line is nice, but a bit too clinical.  I get that this is the theme, but it just feels a bit uninteresting, even after a short while.  What follows are 2 pre-shows, with screens which give a back story from characters from the show (spoken in Germany, but with English subtitles), as well as a staff member guiding you through.  They are nice, and the rooms are nicely themed, but they do go on too long for my liking.  
 
We got to the station and were on the second train (being first in the pre shows doesn't guarantee first in the station).  The ride itself is fun.  The traverser taking you to the launch track is in another very white room, which again feels quite boring.  The launches are nice and smooth; they're certainly not fast but that's not really the point I feel.  The inversions are taken quite slowly, giving a brilliant amount of hang time.  Towards the end of the course there's an amazing bit of airtime which really got me.  It's over quite quickly, but doesn't leave you feeling short changed fortunately.  You do seem to spend an age waiting on the break run though, which feels even longer as there's not much to look at.
 
After our ride, we noticed there was no one in the station (people were being held up by pre show!), so we were able to get a re-ride immediately.  Though this didn't happen later in the day when we rode again, it makes me wonder how sustainable the pre shows are in their current format.  Staff seemed to have iPads showing where groups should be, radios to communicate to each other and god knows what else.  Seemed like a very faffy system for not a lot of pay off!
 



 
Van Helsing's Factory
This was perhaps the only ride I'd heard good things about before visiting.  And I can see why.  The theming is fantastic, the layout is fun and works well with the theming.  The general mood and atmosphere is brilliant.  Just everything about this ride works well together.  Even the queue line, exit and shop just feels so right and complete.  It's a fantastic example showing that a ride as a whole starts the moment you enter the queue (and even when you just see building!), and finishes the moment you leave the shop.  This was a true gem and possibly the biggest surprise of the trip.  The fact that our first ride we queued about 40-45 minutes (basically the longest queue of the trip) and I loved it right away shows its quality.  Plus things quietened as the day went on, meaning several re-rides.
 



 
Bandit
We did the park's wooden coaster in the afternoon, and the queue time was displayed as an hour.  Fortunately it was no where near that (15mins); seems Movie Park just update their queue times to the longest they get all day and leave them like that..  The ride looked like it had potential, but unfortunately fails to deliver.  Every time it looks like it can pick up speed, or produce a decent moment of airtime, it just...doesn't?  And that's the worst thing about this - excitement builds and builds, and it never delivers.
 
It was so uninteresting, I didn't get any photos..
 
MP Express
This was a Vekoma SLC.  It was like any other Vekoma SLC - naff.  The first half of the ride was actually not awfully and shows why SLCs can get decent rides.  The second half was extremely painful, and right down there with the god awful El Condor at Walibi Holland.  
 

 
The Lost Temple
Tucked away near the front of the park, Lost Temple is an immersive tunnel themed around finding a lost temple - shock horror - and uncovering dinosaurs and stuff.  It features several burdenous pre shows (one of which was a real lift which we thought was fake!), and lots of faffing around between pre shows.  The 'experience' as a whole took about 30 minutes, so thank goodness the park wasn't too busy otherwise that would have been a huge chunk of the day gone.  The tunnel itself was meh; the Bobbejaanland one was a bit better really.  The exit pathway and queue to the ride is decent though.
 


 
Bermuda Triangle
Another ride tucked at the entrance to the park (and easily missed!).  This dark boat ride was literally walk on.  I really don't know how to describe this.  The ride starts off outside, before taking you into a volcano.  There were times inside when I didn't know if I was dropping, going up or what.  The theming inside is good, but obviously quite dated - along with the theme itself.  The finale is being taken up a lift in a very misty, very warm part of the volcano, before dropping outside and splashing down.  There's usually a huge amount of mist before a boat drops down, and there were occasional fire effects from the top of the volcano.  It's a really good, yet really bizarre, ride.  I'm gutted I didn't actually take any pictures of it.
 
We tried to get a reride at about 5:20, but when we got to the entrance the entrance board said it closed at 5:15 (even though it definitely said 5:30 when we went there earlier).  There was no queue, and I'm pretty certain the ride has stopped running shortly afterwards.  A frustrating situation.
 
Nick Land
Nick land featured some randoms kiddie rides, some family rides and some coasters.  One coaster, the Jimmy Neutron themed Vekoma SFC, was closed all day.  Annoying spite.  One coaster was a Vekoma rollerskater "themed" to the Backyardians.  We more or less got straight on.  It was meh.  There was also a Spongebob "themed" Wild Mouse, which was alright.  We also did the Dora the Explorer "themed" log flume, which got me drenched to the bone.  
 
I don't really have much else to say.  Nick Land looked quite out of place compared to large proportions of the park.  It felt very run down, the theming was minimal to non-existent, and I really feel like the park could do a lot better.
 

 
Mystery River
This Neverending Story esque rapids ride is tucked tight at the back of Nick Land, and turned out to be a neat little surprise.  I'd say it's in my top 3 rapids rides; it has a good length, decent amount of theming and an acceptable level of wetness.  It's also helped by the fact that you basically can't see the ride at all from anywhere on park, so you really have no idea what is coming.  The biggest disappoint is that you have to survive walking through Nick Land to get to it.
 

 
Crazy Cops Stunt Show
I love a good stunt show, and we wandered into this show not really knowing what to expect, aside from screeching tires and loud noises.  This ended up being really good, featuring a decent level of stunts featuring cars, bikes and falls, as well as some decent effects, slapstick comedy and an easy-to-follow 'story' of sorts.  It was just great fun to watch, and a great way to break up the day.  It's a shame things like this aren't as common in the UK any more..
 
The High Fall
A tall drop tower with nice views of the park, a bit of suspense and tilting seats.  Pretty good fun all in all.  
Tip - if anyone ever visits and sees a long queue for this, just do a double check.  The indoor queue is a cattlepen where one wall is a mirror and makes the queue look double in length.  Caught us out first time..
 

 
There was some other stuff around the park, including a simulator featuring massive sets and John Cleese, which was meh, a few nicely themed or styled flats that we didn't bother with (Top Spin, Disk'o, Rockin' Tug, etc).  But the final thing of note I want to mention...
 
The Walking Dead - Breakout
A year-round horror maze with a 5 euro upcharge, Walking Dead - Breakout felt like it had a lot to live up to, since the park was apparently good at Halloween and with its scare mazes.  Plus the fact Walking Dead is a huge brand and has mazes at several locations, it felt like it had to be good for Movie Park to be a deserving park to have it.  
 
The maze is open 1-4pm, and we bought out tickets online and booked for 1pm.  Unfortunately the time slot system is non existent and you turn up whenever you want.  
 
Even more unfortunate is the fact that the maze is terrible.  It's themed nicely, but there's no real scares, no opportunity for scares, not enough actors, no real scary atmosphere.  It's just terrible.  It terms of actual frights, I'd say it's comparable to Platform 15 (a maze notoriously known not to be able to offer many scares last year).  This really was a crying shame, a huge disappointment - possible my personal biggest disappoint at any park across Europe.
 
 
And so that's that.  Movie Park Germany is perhaps a little underrated, though Star Trek definitely improves the line up.  They've got a couple of solid coasters, a decent dark and water ride collection and the odd sparkle across flats and live entertainment.  Certainly not a park I'd call a must-do, but definitely worth looking into at the very least.
 
 
Next up (and hopefully before Christmas...) - Efteling!
 

It's been a while since I've done a trip report but here we go. Another road trip which for me meant I would hit 200 creds! WOO.
 
Where do we start? A French park with an inverted Vekoma boomerang cos why not.
 

We left Dover on a meh British weather Saturday arriving in Dunkirk the Sunday morning. Before heading to the park we went into Calais for a meander as this is where we were staying. Apparently asking for a pain au chocolat is difficult even though it's how we both say it. Language barriers are great.

Calais had this

And this. Cos culture is nice

Much nicer than the first thing you essentially see at the park.

Bagatelle was an odd park. I don't know if I liked it or not. They had two coasters made by a company no one knows off cos they basically only made these two coasters.

A bright orange torture device (that wasn't awful)

A one adult per boat log flume which shows you the border around the park with local basketball courts.

A pirate themed area aka a pirate boat, orange ferris wheel and a chain with a no entry sticker on to stop you leaving the park border.

An actually okay rapids with moments of decent theming.

An Autopia type ride but with a really good layout. Best ride here.

A brand new air race with themed surrounding buildings on lovely fresh tarmac

A normal sized log flume with stupidly fast lift

One of these but allowing adults to ride

And the 2nd of the 2 random coaster manufactures coasters.
 
They also have; a monorail which leaves the park and shows you goats, a spinning wild mouse which was horrific, a single seater tea cups ride for kids, an awful simulator and I'm sure some more awful stuff.
 
Didn't take many photos as the park entertained me so much I ended up watching the F1. So definitely visit. This put me on 198 creds. Yay.
 
We did however have a nice evening in Calais

I had alcohol

There was this

This stunning building

And we played a few games of pool at the hotel with you guessed it...

Alcohol. Woop.
 
I will try and do the rest of the trip when I get time but it might take a while

Hello again, long time no see. It's been a quick six month break since I've been on here, since my 'emotional' breakdown a few months back. In that time, my love for rollercoasters has been reinvigorated without the related cynicism that forums can sometimes create. I thought I'd do a blog of somewhat of what I've been up to. 
 
April 2017 - France/Germany road trip
 
Three months ago, (where has the time gone), myself along with Peaj, Dan and Fred went on a six park trip across Western Europe parks. The aim was for everyone to grab the odd new B&M, Intamin and new parks galore. For all of us, the only new park was Movie Park Germany. I have to admit our trip was oddly planned, we somehow missed all the new rides that were due to open in May, however I think in spite of this, we had a wonderful time. So to start off we went to Parc Asterix. I think of this is a very under-rated place. The rides are fun, enjoyable, interestingly themed and very re-rideable. The obvious highlight is Oz'Iris which, five years after my first ride is still an incredible ride. We managed a back row and front row ride and each was enjoyable. It managed to toe the line between modern and old school B&M and the custom layout works really well with the nearby theming.

Tonnerre de Zeus has had some queue line work too but seemed rougher then I remember, presumably its starting to age and might need a little bit of work done. I was impressed with the parks newer additions such as the disk which features fire effects and the way the ride is designed into the lake. I love Goudurix. This may be controversial but it's an intense, raw experience which many newer rides could learn lessons from. Sure its still rated one of the worst rollercoasters in the world but I don't think it deserves the hatred it received.
 
Park 2 was Nigloland, a park celebrating its 30th anniversary. This park has a lot of Mack rides, in fact it almost comes across as a mini Europa Park. This was my biggest surprise of the trip frankly, it's a fantastic park that retains its family history and the obvious pride in the place is something you just don't get with company parks. The obvious star of Nigloland is Alpina-Blitz, an absolutely sublime rollercoaster and by a country mile my favourite ride of the trip. One of my favourite aspects of it is the little Mack touches, the way the ride has such forceful air time in the Blue Fire type trains, the little walkway that extends over the track in the station to allow disabled access, the way it borrows the best bits from Piraten (Djurs Sommerland) and improving on them massively. As I've got older, I don't re-ride rides more then 2/3 times but Alpina Blitz, we got ten rides out of. It is worth the trip to here alone.


Other rides in Nigloland aren't 'quite' up the standard of Blitz, but they don't need to be. Euro-Sat has a little brother here for example and whilst not quite as good or as long, is a nice surprise. The log flume, I found very strange. It runs about nine boats in total and contains only one drop in a very short layout. Strange. I loved the powered coaster, I forced the others to ride a further two times. A few rides there were a bit dodgy such as the Jungle Cruise rip off or the Jurassic Park walkthrough which were a waste of time really, but in the context of the park are good fillers. The new drop tower which sticks out like a saw thumb was pretty terrifying if only for the sheer size of the tower. The drop had nothing on our Detonator, however its height was intimidating.

 
Park 3 - Holiday Park
 
The original intention was to visit Walygator for Monster and Anaconda. However when that decided to open three weeks later, we quickly diverted to Holiday Park in Germany. It's been eleven years since I last visited and I originally didn't really like Expedition Ge Force finding it over-rated and disappointing. My opinion on this has morphed slightly, however I think EGF is now severely outclassed by Shambhala, Alpina Blitz and Piraten. The ride was running one train and because of intamin related problems, it took ages to load. The restraints bite hard into taller people meaning the air time hills become more and more painful as it goes on. I'm 6 foot and was on the edge of pain. It was more enjoyable then I remembered but there's just no way that the ride is number one.

 
The new star of Holiday Park is Sky Scream. I liked it a lot. I'd been on Superman at Discovery Kingdom and it is pretty much exactly the same albeit, the theme is very different. Horror theme just doesn't work on this kind of rollercoaster, especially in glorious sunshine. Holiday Park suffers from a lack of family rollercoasters. It has two thrill machines and then everything else is slightly below par. An average omni-mover, a pretty good rapids and a stupidly wet log flume don't really make up for the lack of family support rides. The drop tower being themed to a teenager tv show was odd.
 
Phantasialand
 
Everyone knows this park is awesome, that goes without saying. I love the Baron hour extra ride time for guests at the end of the day, I love the hotel, I adore how cheap the ride photos and food are at at the park. I hate Winjas. The news of a launched flyer is welcome news. Kind of glad it isn't B&M as well. 

Fantastic views of Mamba from the hotel room
 
Movie Park
 
This place is weird. You can tell that it's had a change in direction with one half of the park being movie themed and the rest rides just chucked at pathways. The highlight by far was Van Helsing which isn't just a good ride, is a stand out Gerstlauer wild mouse. Some really forceful hair pins and great dips in a ride that really showcases the best of the company. It's theme was pretty decent too, although admittedly the head peeking out of the ceiling on the exit platform was more comedic then scary. The rest of the park is pretty poor though. Star Trek was desperately needed but not ready to open on our visit. The Vekoma SLC was Dan's first of this type, well deserving of a front row seat. Wasn't that bad but after Oz'Iris and Black Mamba, it doesn't come across well. The only photo I have of the day is Oswald at Disneyland Paris so that will have to do.

 
And finally Efteling 
 
When I was younger and in my theme park teenage years, there were three parks that I always wanted to visit because they sounded more magical then theme parky. They were Liseberg, Tivoli Gardens and Efteling. And I was finally ticking this off my list. The park was busy and queues for the big rides topped an hour. My obvious interest was Baron 1898 which I'll talk about later. Firstly, Flying Dutchman. What a great concept let down solely by the middling rollercoaster bit. The theming of Efteling is second to none and the atmosphere of the indoor bit is fantastic. I was slightly thrown off by the lift hill where I thought an obvious backwards bit was going to happen but didn't. Next, Volga Rock a rather extravagant Vekoma rollercoaster which I really enjoyed. My memory is hazy because of the sheer oddness of the trip. The fairy dark ride is fabulous. I was taken back by the sheer scale of the ride, the attention to detail of the sets is incredible. The Venom Madhouse requires you to know Dutch and well, we don't. Music was great though. Joris en de Draak, the parks racing woodies were both running one trains and to be honest, I didn't think it had anything on Wodan. I don't get the appeal of racing coasters to be honest, the rides motions get completely ignored by wanting to see where the other train has gone. And I hate losing.

And finally, Baron. I thought this was a wonderful take on the dive machine concept. I like my rides to involve the people passing by so the little bell emanating from the lift hill when a train is about to descend is the kind of detail I love to see. The show rooms on this don't rely on a knowledge on the Dutch language enabling anyone to understand the story. The drop is rather nifty and whilst shorter then Oblivion has a similar impact. The zero g is good.The air time hill is terrible. There isn't a single bit of sensation as the train rises and falls over the track and fills like its there to increase ride length only. The ride also has a problem with capacity. It only has three trains and even with that there is massive stacking. Oblivion with its seven trains (in its heyday anyway) runs rings around Baron. In spite of this, 1898 is thematically far more interesting and engaging then Oblivion. The power of dive machines to grab attention is second to none. 

 
And with that the trip was over. Some of the top parks in Europe are only a couple of hours away from the UK so there really is no excuse not to go.
 
Next up was Thorpe Park which was absolutely dead. Where was everyone? This was my first time on Derren Brown and I have to say it was relatively enjoyable. It suffers from the Merlin problem that acting = shouting at guests and ordering them around. I loved the train concept and even fell for the bit where a tube train is thundering down the tunnel. We were lucky that there was no queue and we got batched in straight away. It's not worth a long queue but it is interesting that the ride length of Derren Brown is probably longer then every other ride at Thorpe put together.
This is Samurai which I haven't ridden for about three years.
 
Next up was Disneyland Paris where we were by chance around for the reopening of Space Mountain as the shameless cash in, Hyperspace Mountain. I didn't like this one bit and the main problem is the clashing of themes. Star Wars on the Californian version is fine, that has a rather charmless theme as it is. The Jules Verne mixed with X-Wings and Death Stars doesn't work at all. Sadly this ride will be a lot more popular with visitors, equalling longer queues, meaning the original version from 1995, may now never return. On the plus side, the new trains are excellent albeit, slightly more restrictive then the old ones.

 
Other new features for the 25th include a new parade (which was a massive upgrade from the old one), a new firework show (which is a massive downgrade from Dreams) and new day time shows celebrating the magic of DLP.

I forgot to mention Europa Park, but lets face it that place is just insanely incredible. It was the quietest I've ever seen it with being able to stay on Blue Fire three times in a row or walk on front row Wodan. New area Ireland is fine, the rather odd choice of theming a rockin' tug around a Titanic life boat is an interesting choice for a ride..
 

 
Blue Fire remains as incredible as always, surely one of the best rides ever built. It's on its 9th season but you couldn't tell it as it has not aged one iota. The drops with that level of smoothness make it one of the most consistent rides out there.
 
I apologise for this blogs length and well done if you even got half way. It's been a breezy six months and I'm so glad that my passion for theme parks have been reinvigorated. Nothing is like our hobby, the sheer escapism and joy from theme parks is unrivalled. And to end this length trip report, here's Scenic Railway at Margate which gave me chills.
 

I'm not one for creating huge blogs so...
 
Just got back from my second visit to Europa having been five years ago, and think I enjoyed it even more. This is truly a wonderful place and hope to be back sooner than five years.

As you'd expect, all rides working, no breakdowns, high capacity, friendly staff, good food (and too much choice).
 
Got on many rides and the longest queue was 25 mins for Matterhorn Blitz, everything else around the 10-15 mins mark. Sunday park open till 7:30 and Tuesday on our second day open until 9:00.
 
Was fantastic to twice see engineers working on animatronics, proving they truly do keep everything going, unlike some places we all know a bit too well 
 
I really recommend visiting the Silver Lake Saloon for dinner if anyone visits the park and stays nearby. Great food and great surroundings. Just a few pics...

I know it’s been a silly amount of time since I started this, let's wrap it up. The wait has been because sadly my old laptop has died, taking my photos with it until I work out how to rescue them, so shiny new laptop is good for me and means I can finally write this, but a text only end to this is less good for you, dear reader...
 
My only other experience of a Mack spinner is Sierra Sidewinder at Knotts, which is such a pathetic sucky excuse for coaster I wasn't expecting anything from Euro Mir, but it's ace! The lifthill of forever gives some good fun rave times, the first half of the coaster section with the slow spinning I found strangely unnerving because of the height and feeling of hanging over the edge of the track, and the second half so unexpectedly intense it shocked me. I love spinners in general, and this is one of the best. 9/10.
 
The other big old coaster I was less of a fan of, it's just so uncomfortable in there. Euro Sat I can only assume is themed to replicate the inside of an oven, the slow climb steadily reaching into hotter and hotter air until just when I thought I could take it no more it slams you through its manoeuvres relentlessly until it smashes to an end on brakes, which feel like a lump of concrete has been left on the tracks. I don't know at what temperature steel melts, but I was fully expecting the track to fold away from underneath me like plasticine at any moment. I can appreciate the craziness, but it's just a little too chaotic for me. 7/10
 
Then we come to the two newest coasters at the back of the park in Blue Fire and Woodan, and they both blew me away. Woodan is rough enough to know it's wood, smooth enough to be enjoyable for everyone. It flies though the course throwing little nuggets of airtime at you over and over, doing nothing too extreme to offend, but never being dull for a moment. It is perfectly executed from the first step into the queueline until it slides back into the station. Except maybe that adverse camber turn into the lifthill - that freaked me the hell out. Blue Fire I'd probably rate as the best in the park. My first Mack launch, and they clearly should be everywhere. The launch smooth and powerful with the train seeming to crackle down the track and the layout fantastic; probably the best series of inversions on any coaster anywhere, especially the last one where the train seems to disappear from beneath you mid inversion. And it's all made so enjoyable by the comfort and freedom of the restraints. Both a solid 10/10.
 
The place is so huge I could write for pages and pages (I know, I already have!), even on just the outstanding bits, which are many. But I won’t, so just to cover a few bits which stand out in my memory…
- Arthur (or '**** ***** *****, the ride' as we called it owing to the slightly lively lyrics for a children's ride) is an odd one. We really enjoyed it and the theming is well done, but as an advert for the ride from Mack it seems to be a bit of a shocker with loads of downtime, seats out of action all over the place and a locker room of faff which just does not work. The queue was always slow, long, hot and tiresome, which obviously stands out a mile in a park so obsessed with efficiency. It’s decent enough when you’re on it though. They’ve also taken the two best kiddie rides from Holiday Park with the drop towers and bouncy roundabout thing, which is a nice support selection.
- Pirates of Somewhere other than the Caribbean was a blast, really well done, and the second visit to the Wicked Witches clamshells of my youth were vastly superior to the previous encounter on this trip, even if a hanging is a bit strong! Other than that though I think the other dark rides slightly let the park down, with the already mentioned Cassandra, the dinosaur ride being dull and tired, the shooter very forgettable, and the Bench Christmas thing sitting uncomfortably close to embarrassing even if it does just about manage a little hint of charming.
- You can really see and feel the quality in the upkeep and theming of Europa on rides with direct UK comparisons; the teacups glide fast and effortlessly, the pirate ship looks like it was built yesterday, the seastorm boats in a room of effects. It’s all like new.
 
- The rest of everything is pretty much all fantastic; I'm particularly fond of a bobsled and this ones great, the logflume/coaster diamond mine interaction, unexpected things to stumble upon like the crown jewels thing, the food being so authentic to the areas, food loop, beer everywhere, stunning extravagant shows, happy enthusiastic staff, wonderful hotel facilities open to all. I could go on for ever more.

 
Everyone said 2 days wouldn't be enough. They were right. I'm not sure two weeks would be enough, I don't think I could ever get enough. Nowhere is without its faults, but Europa has instantly become my favorite theme park in the world. I feel like I've visited at the right time too; the two newest coasters really round off a hell of a collection, and unfortunately I'm not particularly interested in project V. So for now I've had my fix. As we sat with our cocktails under the dancing fountains of Bell Rock on our last night we decided that we most certainly will be back...
 

 
 
TLDR - The message is Go to Europa Park!