Matt N’s Solo South East Jaunt Mk2 12th/13th April 2026 (Adventure Island/Thorpe Park) - (13th April 2026: Thorpe Park)

13th April 2026: Thorpe Park

Today, I had my second and final day of the trip, with my first visit of the season to Thorpe Park! New though it may not be, I always love a Thorpe visit, and I couldn’t wait to get back on Hyperia, Stealth and some of my other favourite coasters in the country for my first time in 2026!

As always with a hotel stay, I ended up peaking quite early, so I caught an Uber to Thorpe from Staines that got me there at a lovely early 9:10am, meaning that I got through the turnstiles by 9:15am and was well placed to get to my first ride promptly at opening time:

After the gates were opened, I made a beeline for my first ride…

Colossus

Large crowds were sprinting towards Hyperia, but while I did go in that general direction, I went against the crowd and started my day with a ride on Colossus, as I have historically found to be a good tactical bet at Thorpe. Even with Hyperia now in the picture, this still worked very well, with me getting onto the first train of the day quite effortlessly! So, how was the ride? Well, it was OK; the first half was great, with great speed and force through the elements, and while there were some mild moments of roughness, it was by no means terrible. However, I’ll admit Colossus isn’t an absolute favourite of mine for a variety of reasons. As is well documented at this point, the trains are absolutely dreadful, with horribly tight restraints and very little legroom, but even excluding the trains, I’m not a fan of that ending with all the rolls in a row. One would be fun, but I think four at once is too many consecutively. All in all, though, Colossus was still a good start to the day, and I was certainly gratified to be off my first ride before 10:10am:

After Colossus, I headed over to another coaster…

Saw: The Ride

Saw was on an advertised 10 minute queue, so I could well have ridden it in the main queue and gotten on quickly, but being on my own and seeing that there were a fair number of people, I still decided to gamble on a further reduced wait and try the single rider queue. This proved to be fruitful, as I was on within 5 minutes and was batched into the front row of a car as soon as I got into the building; I can never moan about that, particularly when it had me getting off my second ride of the day comfortably before 10:30am! So, how was Saw? Well, I was interested to ride it after going on Rage yesterday to see how it compared, and having ridden the two a day apart, I have to say that perhaps controversially, I definitely preferred Saw! I often find the front rougher than the back on Saw, so I feared it might be bad, but other than the notable jolt between the first drop and the Immelmann, which is always a bad moment, the rest of it rode fairly well; even the post-MCBR section, while a bit rough, wasn’t too bad! In terms of how I’d compare Saw and Rage, Rage doesn’t have a bad jolt like the drop on Saw, but I don’t think the two are that different in terms of smoothness otherwise, and Saw is my definite winner in terms of layout; it’s just a lot more substantial, and I much prefer Saw’s fast pacing and surprising jolts of airtime to Rage’s focus on hangtime and tight inversions and helixes. I’d also probably say I prefer Saw to Smiler as well, with it possibly vying with Speed for the title of my favourite Gerstlauer thrill coaster based on today’s ride. Saw’s not an absolute favourite of mine, as I do still find it a bit too uncomfortable for me to fully rate it, but it was running well, all things considered, and I still enjoyed the ride overall; I do think it’s grown on me somewhat over the years:

After Saw, I decided to scope out the situation at a favourite of mine…

Hyperia

Hyperia was on an advertised 55 minute queue time, but upon exploring the situation further, I noticed that the single rider queue looked short, so I decided to take a chance. My hunch was proven correct, as I was batched onto the ride within just 10-15 minutes; I’m calling that a considerable win for single rider, as that beat the main queue considerably and is by far the quickest I’ve ever gotten on Hyperia! Perhaps a triple hit of Colossus/Saw/single rider Hyperia might be a good starting strategy to settle on at Thorpe from now on? Anyway, how was the ride? Well, I absolutely love Hyperia, and the row 9 ride I had was absolutely sublime! There’s so much to love about Hyperia, from my end; as someone who loves a good hyper coaster, the ride appeals to my tastes enormously! There are negative g-forces all over the place; that first drop is absolutely obscene, with sustained ejector all the way down, but pretty much every other element on the ride also provides wonderful negatives too! The ride also packs a phenomenal sense of speed, and as well as that, it’s wonderfully smooth and comfortable, making it a very moreish coaster that always has me looking forward to coming back to it! There’s a lot more I could say about Hyperia, but in short, I’ll just say that it’s by far my favourite coaster in Thorpe Park, comfortably my favourite coaster in the UK and sits comfortably within my top 10, most probably in my top 5. It’s enhanced this park so much coaster-wise:

After Hyperia, I headed over to the other side of the park to do another coaster I hadn’t yet done…

Nemesis Inferno

Nemesis Inferno was on an advertised 10 minute queue time, so I decided to take a ride on there. The queue ended up being longer than advertised, taking 25 minutes all in, but this still wasn’t particularly long by any stretch and this was already my 4th coaster by a little after 11am, so I wasn’t too miffed at this. But how was the ride? Well, I think Inferno is always a decent coaster; while it’s not Nemesis, I always find it an enjoyable invert in its own right, and today was no exception! I was sat in row 5, and the ride was smooth, fast and forceful, with some nice punchy inversions and a surprisingly punchy helix at the end; what’s not to like? All in all, then, I thoroughly enjoyed my ride on Nemesis Inferno; I always enjoy getting back on there:

After Inferno, I headed for yet another nearby coaster…

Stealth

Stealth was on an advertised 35 minute queue, so as I hadn’t yet ridden Stealth and I always love a ride on it, I decided to give it a go. The 35 minute advertised queue turned out to be closer to 25 in actuality; I can never complain about an overstated queue! So, how was the ride? Well, I was sat in row 9, and the ride was absolutely fantastic; I always love Stealth, and today was no exception! That launch is so wonderfully punchy, and I also love the top hat airtime and general sense of speed of the thing! I will say that the trains aren’t the most comfortable (if the ride had lap bars like Red Force, we’d be onto a winner!), but this is a minor niggle rather than a deal breaker, and it doesn’t stop me from loving every second of the ride and putting Stealth firmly in my top 20 and probably above Red Force; despite Red Force’s additional height and speed, the raw power of that hydraulic launch wins out every time for me! All in all, then, I absolutely love Stealth; it’s an absolute belter of a ride, and I definitely think a hydraulic launch is something to be celebrated with these getting ever rarer:

After Stealth, I went for a slightly early Burger King lunch to try and beat the lunchtime rush (I’m not entirely sure whether this strategy worked…), but after that, I went to tick off the final coaster I hadn’t yet done…

The Swarm

The Swarm was on an advertised 35 minute queue time, so as I hadn’t yet ridden it today, I fancied a ride on there. As with Stealth, the 35 minute advertised time was an overstatement and I waited only 25 minutes; I can never moan about that! So, how was it? Well, I was seated in row 5, and it was absolutely fantastic; I’ve always had a soft spot for Swarm, and today was no exception! In terms of specific things I love about the ride, it has some absolutely brilliant elements; the first drop is absolutely brilliant, boasting an awesome sense of speed as you rush towards the ground, I also like the floaty zero-g roll afterwards, and that final roll is a particular highlight, taken at just the right speed to offer some lovely out-of-your-seat hangtime without being uncomfortable! I also love the sense of speed that the winged trains provide, and the ride is also lovely and smooth! All in all, then, I loved my ride on Swarm; it’s not hard for me to see why this was once my #1 coaster, and perhaps controversially, I still have it sat in my top 20:

After I got off Swarm, there was an announcement that all outdoor rides were closing due to lightning in the vicinity, so in order to keep on riding, I initially decided to face some fears of mine and finally give The Walking Dead a go, having not ridden it since the retheme. I tried the single rider queue, but as it practically hadn’t moved after about 10 minutes and the lightning closure was short-lived, I decided after seeing Detonator running that I could maintain my Walking Dead virginity for a little longer, particularly as I was hesitant that I’d actually like Walking Dead:

After leaving the single rider queue for Walking Dead, I headed for my first flat ride of the day…

Detonator

Detonator was on an advertised 5 minute queue time, so as I always love a good drop tower and Detonator is a very good one indeed, I decided to take a ride on there. The queue was marginally longer than advertised, taking more like 10 minutes, but I can’t complain as this was still a very short queue. So, how was the ride? Well as I said above, I am a fan of a good drop tower, and Detonator is probably one of my favourites! Despite its somewhat diminutive size by drop tower standards, Detonator has a deceivingly punchy drop; it launches you down with such force, and you absolutely fly out of your seat with some awesome sustained airtime! These Fabbri towers are all brilliant; Jolly Roger and Venom were absolutely fantastic as well, from memory, and I am stunned that Fabbri never sold more drop towers! All in all, then, I absolutely loved my ride on Detonator; though short, it always hits the spot for me, and I’d increasingly put it on my “must ride” list when visiting Thorpe:

After getting off Detonator, I went for another ride on Stealth, on an advertised 20 minute queue that took around 30. I was seated in row 2, and it was once again fantastic; with the tiered seating, I got a small taste of that front row speed! It was also quite a wet ride, as it rained a fair bit while I was in the queue:

After getting off Stealth, I went for another flat ride…

Rush

Rush was on an advertised 10 minute queue time, so I decided to have a go on there. As an added bonus, the 10 minute advertised queue was if anything overstated; I was on the ride within around 5 minutes, which I can never complain about! So, how was the ride? Well, despite me not generally being a massive fan of flat rides as I mentioned yesterday, the S&S Screamin’ Swing is another ride type I can make an exception for; I do enjoy Rush! With it not being a ride that spins, I don’t find it overly nauseating, and I really enjoy the nice pops of floater airtime at each peak and the speed in each trough! Unfortunately, Rush does run quite a weak cycle; I noticed only one or two full height swings today before the ride started to peter out. Nonetheless, I did enjoy my ride, and it was nice to get back on there as I haven’t done it since 2024, to my memory:

After getting off Rush, I headed for a reride on Hyperia using the single rider queue. The ride was on an advertised 85 minute queue time at this point, and single rider was not quite as fruitful here, with me waiting 65 minutes (still a net benefit, but not nearly as much as earlier). One thing that made this ride interesting is that I was sat next to a chatty, but nervous woman who wanted me to make small talk with her going up the lift hill to make her less nervous, so I chatted to her about various things as we climbed. She seemed to enjoy the ride despite her nerves, and we agreed on the brake run that it’s often the anticipation that’s the worst part if you’re scared of coasters… if you’re reading this, Gemma from Eastbourne, it was nice to meet you! As for the ride itself, I was sat in row 2 this time. It was my first time ever riding Hyperia in the front half of the train, and while I was sceptical about whether some of my favourite bits would hit as hard in the front, I have to say that overall, the ride was possibly even better than in the back half of the train! My favourite bit of the ride, the first drop, still more than holds its own in the front, as does the Immelmann, but the other elements after that seemed even more powerful in the front half of the train, with the stall and the two outerbanks seemingly packing more powerful and sustained negative g’s in the front. Contrary to my original suspicions, I am wondering if Hyperia might be a front row coaster, as much as I’ve always loved the back for the full power of that obscene first drop:

After getting off Hyperia, the weather looked as though it might be turning again, so in the spirit of “the anticipation is the worst part” that my Hyperia companion and I had discussed, I decided to grow a pair and try facing some fears of my own that I backed out of to ride Detonator earlier…

The Walking Dead: The Ride

Walking Dead was on an advertised 20 minute queue time, so as it was one of the shortest queues in the park at this point and the weather looked as though it was taking a turn for the worse, I decided to give it a ride, albeit in the main queue after seeing the static nature of single rider earlier. The 20 minute queue time was slightly overstated, if anything, and I was batched into the pre-show within about 15 minutes. So, how was it? Well, I should probably preface my review by saying that I’m not very good with horror and have always avoided the blatant horror attractions, particularly those with actors, for this reason. I thought Walking Dead might be a milder way to introduce myself to this style of attraction to confirm whether I actually like it. With my fears in mind, I was definitely quite anxious to ride Walking Dead, and prior to today, I hadn’t actually ridden the coaster since my first ever visit to Thorpe Park back in 2014, when it was still known as X! Thankfully, there were no actors in Walking Dead today… but I’ll admit I still absolutely hated it and am quite sure that I definitely don’t like the blatant horror attractions; I don’t think you’ll find me doing scare mazes any time soon. I’ll grant them that it’s well done, but I just found the whole thing far too dark, far too loud and far too in-your-face for my liking even without actors, and I frankly couldn’t wait to get out of there. If I’m to put my emotions and fears aside and talk more objectively, the coaster itself is actually not a bad family coaster at all. The track and train is good fun, has some fun twists and turns and maintains fairly good speed, and it’s not a bad length either. The theming is also admittedly well executed even if not to my taste, with it being a far more elaborate and cohesive themed experience than I remember X being. However, experiencing this today confirmed to me what I always suspected; that even putting aside my own dislike of horror attractions, the Walking Dead retheme is possibly one of the most stupid decisions, if not the most stupid decision, Merlin has ever made, in my humble opinion. The coaster hardware lends itself nicely to being a whole family attraction for a park that lacks whole family attractions, and indeed it was one as X, but the in-your-face 13+ horror theming is completely incongruous with the hardware and puts off people who might be quite attracted to this type of ride. Some people moan about rides like Thirteen and Wicker Man having dark themes incongruous with their hardware, but Walking Dead is a coaster where I’d argue that the mismatch is far, far more blatant, with the theming being much scarier and more in-your-face and the ride hardware being much tamer. Overall, then, I’m glad I gave Walking Dead a try and it was interesting to do something a bit different, but I’m sorry to say I didn’t like it at all and don’t think I’ll be doing any other scare mazes or horror attractions of this nature any time soon; I think a ride like The Curse at Alton Manor is about the upper limit of horror level I can cope with and enjoy:

After Walking Dead, I decided to head over to do the final coaster I needed to get the clean sweep of operating coasters at Thorpe today…

Flying Fish

Flying Fish was on an advertised 10 minute queue time, so I decided to take a ride on there. With me having done Walking Dead today, riding Flying Fish was important to me as it actually made today the first time in all my years visiting Thorpe Park that I’ve ever ridden all operating coasters at the park in one day, which is made even more impressive to me by the fact that there were only 7 coasters when I first started visiting and there are now 8. For a litany of reasons, there’s always been at least one coaster at Thorpe I’ve missed in every other day I’ve ever had there, but today bucked that trend, which I was pleased with! So, how was Flying Fish? Well, I was on within 10 minutes and I was seated in row 4, and it was fun enough, but I did find myself remembering why I don’t do it very often in a park filled with awesome rides like Thorpe. It picks up some mild speed in places, and is fun enough for younger visitors, but is definitely the weakest coaster in the park from a track and train standpoint and is actually surprisingly jolty for a coaster of the size. It was certainly a fun enough ride, though, and one thing I did notice was that they gave us a very lengthy cycle; has it always done 5 laps? I swear it hasn’t done 5 laps when I’ve ridden it before, but I could be misremembering. In a humorous side note, I noticed that Flying Fish is one of only two rides at Thorpe that my phone’s camera app gives its own geomarker to, with the other being Stealth; whenever I take a picture of Swarm walking up to it, my phone marks the location as “Flying Fish”, with the ride apparently deserving its own geomarker separate from the rest of Thorpe Park:

After getting off Flying Fish, I went for a reride on Swarm, on an advertised 35 minute queue that only took 20. I was seated in row 6 this time, and the ride was once again absolutely fantastic, and possibly even better than earlier:

After Swarm, I went for one final reride on Stealth, on an advertised 25 minute queue that only took 15. I was seated on the back, and it was a fantastic way to end the day; the launch was punchy as ever, and that back row top hat airtime was absolutely wonderful:

After getting off Stealth, ride close was upon us, so I headed out of Thorpe Park to get home after a great day. I took a train out of Staines and changed in Reading, arriving back in Bristol Parkway just after 8pm:

So that wraps up my day at Thorpe Park! I had a brilliant day; I did 14 rides in total, 12 of which were coaster rides. I’m going to say that that isn’t too shabby given that the park wasn’t exactly quiet! I was satisfied to get on all coasters at the park today, as I mentioned earlier, and that actually means that I’ve satisfyingly had a clean sweep of coasters this trip! In terms of specific highlights; Hyperia, my favourite coaster in the UK, was as sublime as always, and I loved getting on the front half of the train for the first time in particular, but the other rides like Stealth, Swarm, Inferno and Detonator were also great, and I just generally liked getting back to Thorpe for my first 2026 visit (with me holding a Merlin pass this year, I’ll almost certainly be back at least once more this season)! I always love a day at Thorpe, and with Hyperia now in the roster, I think it’s a really, really strong park for coasters and thrill rides. I’d say it’s a fierce contender for best coaster lineup in the UK, with Alton being its only real competition in this sense; for me personally, 4 of Thorpe’s coasters make my top 25%, which is pretty favourable on a nationwide and worldwide scale!

That doesn’t just wrap up my day at Thorpe, though; that also wraps up this trip. And all in all, I’ve really enjoyed it! It was nice to get to Southend for the first time, and the +5 from Adventure Island was certainly a satisfying stop on my road to 150, but I also loved today’s day at Thorpe and getting back on some of my favourite coasters in the country too! This trip has made me mull over the idea of finally ticking off Skegness while I’m still off work to truly complete the semi-major UK parks, possibly using Nottingham as a central base and also tying it in with a midweek Merlin pass visit to Towers… watch this space!

Thanks for reading; I hope you’ve enjoyed this report (and yesterday’s too)! I’m not certain of when my next park visit is going to be; it could be a trip to Skegness as I discussed above, but if not, I’d imagine it might be a trip to Paultons to see Valgard… we’ll have to wait and see!