Closed Season seems to have dragged on for a bit too long this season (and I have a bit too much spare time on my hands this afternoon), leading to fanboys, enthusiasts and anyone who visits these humble forums in general over-analysing black and white drawings of a square posted by Thorpe.
But lo! A saviour has cometh!
Meet Tucker:
Tucker is here to save our closed season, and reveal the new thing for 2015. But what is it?
Tucker likes to pull funny faces, so people won't ask what this NEW FOR 2015 thing is:
He gets particularly pouty when people keep bugging him about it:
So he escapes to Alton Towers occasionally, and gets corrected...
And occasionally to Chessington, where he visits their Burger Kitchen restaurant:
No Tucker, the burgers are even smaller than that!
Tucker realises he made a grave mistake - the Burger Kitchen is a terrible place to eat!
The food there makes you feel funny and queasy.
Fortunately, a friend of Tucker has come along to save the day, and push Tucker back to the safety of Thorpe Park...
Will Tucker reveal the secrets of 2015 soon? Who knows. But until then, post your favourite faces of Tucker here, for he's the hero Thorpe Park Mania deserves, but not the one it needs right now. So we'll hunt him. Because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian, a watchful protector. A dark knight. And he'll help make the last couple of days of closed season fly by!
Oh and Thorpe, give this man a bonus!