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Thorpe Park 18th August 2024


Matt N

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18th August 2024: Thorpe Park

Hi guys. Today was an exciting day; the day of my return to Thorpe Park to finally ride Hyperia! I was going to Thorpe today seeking sweet, sweet redemption… I’d already been unsuccessful on a previous attempt to ride Hyperia back in June, with me having to agonisingly watch it test before it reopened 2 days later… that tasted particularly bitter, and to rub salt in the wound, I then watched tons of other people, including my sister who isn’t overly into coasters, go on it and tell me how brilliant it was. Today, I was finally going to find out whether I agreed!

 

That was not the only exciting aspect of the day, however… the other exciting aspect is that after two successful visits to Alton Towers that he absolutely loved, my grandad decided to join me and my dad at Thorpe Park today! After he loved Alton Towers, me and dad thought that Thorpe Park would be the next logical step for him, and I was excited to show him the sights and sounds of the UK’s most thrilling theme park for the first time!

 

That’s enough of a prologue, though; let’s get into the meat of our day at Thorpe Park!

 

We left our home in Gloucestershire at around 7:40am this morning and after a relatively smooth drive barring some reduced speed limits and roadworks on the M4, we arrived at Thorpe Park 2 hours later, making good time for entry into the park a little after 10am following a brief wait for security:

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On the subject of security, we actually had a rather interesting near miss with Thorpe Park security today…

 

As we were queueing for security, my dad was telling my grandad that he would need to take his watch and such off for the metal detector. Thinking that my grandad would be irritated by this, we were both taken by surprise when he said “I’m more worried about the f***ing knife in my pocket!”. Before anyone gets any ideas, I should clarify that this was a small penknife that my grandad uses for gardening and had simply forgotten to take out of his pocket, but it still gave my dad fear that Thorpe Park security staff would get the wrong idea if my grandad tried to go in with it, and he sternly directed my grandad to the sign clearly stating “No Knives”! It didn’t seem to cause any issues (we were relieved, but I’m not sure whether the lack of drama is a good thing or not in the grand scheme of things…), but me and my dad were nonetheless concerned about how this could have been received by the security staff… I think we were very lucky!

 

After thankfully entering the park drama-free, we pondered going to Hyperia first, but as it had by far the longest queue and we wanted to give my grandad a proper first timer’s taste of what Thorpe Park had to offer, we decided to go for a different big coaster first…

Colossus

While some signs said it was closed, Colossus was in fact open on a 0 minute advertised queue, so me and my grandad decided to give it a go (my dad sat this one out, as he’s too tall for the restraints). As promised, the ride was indeed walk-on, so me and grandad waltzed onto row 7 very promptly; you can never complain about that! But how was the ride? Well, I’m not the biggest fan of Colossus, but I have to say that today’s ride in row 7 was not bad at all as Colossus goes, and maybe in contention for being the best ride I’ve ever had on it! It was a bit rough in places, but nothing overly terrible by any stretch, and the first half was pretty decent! The tight restraints definitely take away from the ride, and I’m still not convinced I overly enjoy the numerous consecutive heartline rolls in the second half, but in the grand scheme of Colossus rides, I could not complain too much! My grandad was a big fan of the ride; he described Colossus as “right up there with Smiler as one of the most insane coasters [he’d] ever ridden” and remarked that it “was the first time [he’d] ever felt like [he] was going to fall out of the restraint”!:

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After Colossus, we decided to head to another big coaster nearby…

Saw: The Ride

Saw was on an advertised 10 minute queue, so we decided to take a ride on there. This queue was marginally understated, taking more like 15-20 minutes, but it still wasn’t overly long. So, how was the ride? Well, we were seated on the front row, and I’m afraid to say that it wasn’t an overly good Saw ride; there were a number of notable jolts, including a particularly head-splitting one on the first drop, and there was a general strong roughness throughout. Unfortunately, I’m sad to say that my grandad did not enjoy this one, or at very least, it did not seem to agree with him; he came off it feeling “sick as a dog” and didn’t seem to enjoy the roughness and jerkiness of it. To be honest, I sadly think it was a bit of a day ruiner for him, as I’m not sure he ever completely recovered from it:

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After Saw, we finally decided to give into temptation and ride the big new draw after seeing that its queue time had dropped…

Hyperia

Hyperia was on an advertised 65 minute queue time, and my dad didn’t think that it even looked that long, so we decided to give it a ride. Despite my dad’s thinking that it didn’t look 65, the queue time board was true to its word and we ended up waiting 65 minutes. Even still, I can’t complain too much about a 65 minute queue for a brand new ride in the summer holidays; I’ve waited far worse! So, how was Hyperia after all the anticipation? Well, I was seated in row 8, and it was a phenomenal ride, with obscene speed and very nice airtime and hangtime… but I wasn’t immediately certain on whether it was absolutely top tier. I’m going to remain shtum on Hyperia at this stage in the report, however, as previous experience with hyped-up, revered rides has taught me that 1 ride is not necessarily enough to reliably get the measure of a hyped ride’s true greatness. When I went to Florida last year, for example, both VelociCoaster and Iron Gwazi grew on me considerably after a second ride, so I wondered if the same would be true of Hyperia… let’s just say that the story does not end there! In terms of my dad and grandad’s thoughts, my dad said that it was “undeniably excellent, but not as good as VelociCoaster” (my dad’s favourite ride), remarking that “it was absolutely mental”, and that “the first drop was mental”, but that he was “unsure on [his] feelings on this getting airtime by pushing you out of your seat sideways lark”. I didn’t get much of an opinion from my grandad other than relief that it was smoother than Saw (although I did think I heard a distinct “f***ing hell” fall out of his mouth as we hit the brake run… interpret that however you wish!):

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After Hyperia, we decided to sit down on a bench and calmly eat lunch for a bit before heading to our next big coaster…

The Swarm

The Swarm was on an advertised 35 minute queue, so we decided to take a ride. This queue time ended up being understated, as we ultimately ended up waiting around 50 minutes. On a side note, the operations seemed notably slower than usual on here, with 2+ minute dispatches and stacking being frequent. But how was the ride? Well, we were seated in row 3, and it was really decent! I do really like Swarm, and today was no exception; I love the sense of speed (particularly on the first drop as you start it’s a smooth ride, and I also think that there are some very nice inversions on there! The vest restraints are a minor detractor for me, but not a huge one; I overall thoroughly enjoyed my ride! My grandad seemed a bit non-plussed by the experience, describing it as “a bit uneventful”:

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After The Swarm, we headed over to our next big coaster…

Nemesis Inferno

Nemesis Inferno was on an advertised 30 minute queue, so me and my dad decided to take a ride on there. By this point, my grandad had clearly had enough of the rides and decided to sit Nemesis Inferno out. The 35 minute queue was marginally overstated, instead taking 30 minutes, and we took our seats on the back row. So, how was the ride? Well, I thoroughly enjoyed today’s ride on Nemesis Inferno; it was smooth, was forceful without being excessively forceful, and packed some awesome inversions and a brilliant sense of speed throughout! I do really enjoy Nemesis Inferno, and I don’t think the Nemesis comparison does it any favours; it’s a cracking coaster in its own right! My dad said that the ride was “good”, but that “it definitely wasn’t as smooth as the new Nemesis at Alton Towers” for him (I disagreed with him on this, but to be fair, I was seated in a middle seat while dad was sat in an outer seat):

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After Nemesis Inferno, we met back up with my grandad to head over to Stealth and see whether he’d ride it, but it pretty much closed the second we got there. As my grandad wasn’t even sure if he wanted to ride it anyway and seemed like he’d had enough, we decided to leave the ride be for today. I would have liked to get a ride on there, as I do love Stealth, but I wasn’t too distraught not to seeing as I had 4 rides on my June visit; I can’t exactly say I haven’t already had a decent fill of Stealth this year:

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After we abandoned Stealth, my grandad had no intentions of riding anything else and we’d covered all of the other big coasters, so my dad let me loose to go and reride Hyperia using the single rider queue. I had not one, but two additional rides on Hyperia using this, and both gave me a notable advantage over the main queue. The first ride saw me dodge a 65 minute advertised queue and only wait 35 minutes, while the second ride saw me dodge a 90 minute advertised queue and only wait 30 minutes. I can never complain about that! By complete fluke, I also got assigned to the back row on both rides, so I managed to take two rides in the back right seat, which is supposedly “the best seat on the ride” according to one of the designers!:

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Now, I think it’s about time I talked in a little more detail about Hyperia than I did earlier. The million dollar question is; did Hyperia repeat the phenomenon of VelociCoaster and Iron Gwazi, where “the second ride was the charm”, so to speak? Well, the answer is yes! Oh my god, yes! I loved Hyperia the first time and thought it was phenomenal, but it was the rerides that made me see the height of its true greatness and declare with certainty that for me, this is definitely a top tier ride! Where to begin with it… in terms of some key highlights:

  • That first drop is absolutely unhinged, and so, so good! I love a big first drop, and this is a sublime one; the ejector airtime is absolutely absurd (you get absolutely ripped out of the seat!), the 180 degree twist adds an intriguing additional sensation, and the sense of speed you are hit with at the bottom is nuts! Hyperia definitely sits alongside Mako and Iron Gwazi as having one of my favourite first drops I’ve ever done!
  • That outerbanked turn into the inversion is insane. I’ve never experienced an element quite like it; while I’m not necessarily convinced that sideways airtime beats good old straight airtime for me, the sustained sideways ejector was absolutely absurd!
  • The Immelmann is just wonderful! The speed you get going up into it is brilliant, and you get an absolutely sublime pop of sustained ejector airtime coming out of it! This was a definite highlight of the ride for me!
  • This is a fast ride, and you can definitely feel it! The sense of speed is absolutely absurd; Hyperia reminds you just how fast 81mph is!

I’ll do a longer and more detailed review later in the relevant thread that has a couple of critiques as well, but overall, Hyperia is just absolutely sublime, in my view! It’s a stunning investment for Thorpe Park and the UK theme park industry, and it certainly lived up to the years of hype for me! In terms of comparisons and specific ranking spots; I’ve thought it over following my 3 rides, and I will say the following:

  • It is easily my favourite ride at Thorpe Park
  • It is easily my favourite UK coaster
  • In terms of overall rankings out of the 123 coasters I’ve ridden, I have conservatively opted for the #5 spot, with the ride currently being beaten only by Mako, VelociCoaster, Silver Star and Iron Gwazi in my rankings. It’s definitely a top 5 worthy candidate, folks!

Overall, then; I absolutely loved Hyperia, and it definitely lived up to the hype for me!

 

To return to our Thorpe Park day; by the time I’d had 2 Hyperia rides, it was around 3:45pm. My grandad was clearly flagging and had had enough and my dad seemed like he didn’t to wait around any longer, so we left the park for the day.

 

So, that brings my day at Thorpe Park today to a close! Overall, then, I had a great day; I was thrilled to finally get on Hyperia for the first time, and it did not disappoint! That was my main aim for the day, and with 3 rides on it, I comfortably accomplished this aim! I also enjoyed getting on some of Thorpe’s other great rides; these always put me in a good mood, and while Hyperia is now the crown jewel, some of Thorpe’s other coasters are no slouches either! Thorpe has always had an excellent coaster selection for me, and Hyperia has just taken it to the next level!

 

I was disheartened, however, by the fact that my grandad didn’t seem to have an especially enjoyable day, and didn’t warm to Thorpe Park like he did to Alton Towers. I think I may have made a mortal error by directing us to Saw so early on in the day, as it was that ride that seemed to put him off for the rest of the day. He absolutely loved our first ride on Colossus, and declared that one of his favourites! Me and my dad also had a theory that his sickness feeling may not have been helped by the fact that he decided to forego wearing his glasses for the whole day instead of taking them on and off all day, so he was walking around the park with blurred vision all day. Nonetheless, he just didn’t warm to Thorpe Park at all. He apparently said to my dad that “it seems busy compared to Alton Towers… and I don’t like busy”, and whatever the reason, he just seemed to go off the park and the rides quickly and not warm to them at all. I was sad that he didn’t like it, but he’s never going to like everything and I’m glad that he came and tried it out. I don’t sense he’ll be in a rush to return to Thorpe with us, however!

 

But overall, I thoroughly enjoyed the day and was glad to both accomplish my aim of getting on Hyperia and hear my grandad’s first time thoughts on Thorpe Park!

 

Thanks for reading; I hope you enjoyed this report! My next trip report will be coming on 5th September, when I visit Drayton Manor to take my first ever ride on Gold Rush and ride the last of the new for 2024 UK coasters! I can’t wait to try that ride out!

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