Day 7 – Legoland Billund

Now here was an interesting one, the Merlin park of the group, a park that is usually a burden to visit in the UK, how would the original fare? Would it be smothered in adverts? Would it be full of low throughput rides? Would we hate it for being part of a massive corporate entity? Answers are found and more…

After once again navigating the emptiness of Denmark and a surprise car park appearing out of nowhere (next door to Billund’s own airport) we had arrived and awaited our entry accompanied by two children and a burdenously annoying theme song.

Eventually it opened, and we walked the entire bloody length of the park to arrive at the 2012 Polar Land, and Polar X-Plorer. This was to be the intriguing comparison to Thirteen, purely due to the freefall aspect, how would Zierer’s attempt stand up to Intamin’s extremely good system?

We walked straight through the queue (the cattlepen of death stood on however) and onto the front row of the very comfy trains, and set out on our exploration of the local van-yard behind the park the Artic, and the ride’s surprise appeared. From the first drop to the mountain is actually extremely good and forceful… Grey out forceful in fact. Where did this come from? The first half was such a shock that our entry into the mountain turned into a complete jarring. Unthemed, relatively empty and a broken screen whilst being completely surrounded by the drop system, when the drop itself happened it was ok, but lacked the theatre and quickness that Intamin’s offers. The trundling out finale past some static figures didn’t improve much and eventually you pass the penguin enclosure wondering what happened?

To put it blunty, the drop system is crap in a comparative sense to Intamin’s. The fact that it is hidden and allows for a variation of drops is a real plus point to it, allowing the pre-mentioned theatre and surprise to really take a hold. Maybe Verbolten does this better due to the pure darkness, but Polar fails to use the system to its potential, the trundle out of it making a real mockery of an exciting and impressive first half. The ideal family ride would be the first half of this with the second half of Thirteen it was agreed amongst our group after a second go on the back, where the system is even more blatant than before. A right shame in the end.

6/10

Unsure of our next destination, we spotted the Fire Academy next door to Polar Land, without a queue, something rarely seen ever. So we took the advantage and went 2 on 2 once more on it. Perhaps myself and Nicky took it slightly too seriously after the Fussball defeat, but we were back at base long before Mark and Holly had put out the fire. Overall I would say how much fun it was, if slightly tiring in the end. I would love to do this with a full on enthusiast take-over, then it really would get silly.

Next was the Temple, the Laser Raiders of the park, but a Mack Omnimover instead. WHY ARE THE OTHERS MADE BY SALLY CORP? Anyways, it was essentially the same as the others, with the usual array of things that move but with slightly grander sets and a decent finale room.

Wanting more Mack fixings, we went on X-Treme Racers, another Wild Mouse but an actual Mack one, rather than a Maurer clone. Very jolty and rickety throughout this one, but at least tonnes better than the old Jungle Racer in a box.

Completing our Legoland staples, Jungle Racer was actually next, but was a WaveRider this park around. Usual affair here, with waterbombs placed slightly out of reach of the riders, making them absolutely pointless.

We then realised we had missed the Ice Pilots Academy back in Polar Land, and knowing that it would have a low throughput, we ran back and went on it before we strayed too far away. It was to be my first experience of a KUKA Robo-Arm ride of any form, having not been on Potterland yet, and the aspect of designing your ride (Read as, press the buttons randomly) was an intriguing idea. We started off slow (Speed 2), picked our moves and on we went to an extremely random and fun experience. So we headed back around and hit up Speed 5 and went X-Treme (as Lego would put it). The differences are quite telling, the transitions are faster and the motions wilder, but still not beyond the realms of too intense for the core audience of the park. A real surprise but with only 20 people max a go, it’s no surprise why these things are so rare, even if they are incredibly random and good fun. When all 5 in one section are going it is a mesmerising experience to say the least.

We had a quick look at the Penguins whilst in the area as well.

Back on park, it was time to return to the Legoland staples, and the Dragon coaster, which also returned us onto the path of the Mack. Strangely, this is a powered coaster, which automatically means a single train. WHY LEGOLAND? It still however retains the traditional dark ride section which felt longer and larger than our Windsor counterpart. In addition, the powered system of the ride came into play well on the transition from dark ride to coaster, providing a decent launch into the outdoor layout. It would be better if a second train were to appear on this. Maybe it does? Either way a decent coaster helped by the crazy ride host who singled out Mark and his Viking hat being Swedish and from Djurs.

Upon exiting we realised that the stunt show was about to take place, so we took our seats and were allowed to enjoy an action heavy, dialogue-less romp around the mini-castle set, featuring (unsurprisingly) lots of people landing in water. It was a simple story to follow, but very entertaining, owing to the simple stunt gags they used and the old ‘suspension of disbelief’. I would certainly say that people should catch this (and the pre-show entertainment) if they’re ever at the park.

Next door to the show was Viking River Splash, an Intamin version of the ride which is accentuated by the massive lift and drop combo. It’s similar to the other versions, with some scenes practically cloned in but a very different (and dizzy) layout allows it to give its own version of events. The lift and drop is a brilliant finale to have on it as well, and we all fully enjoyed our go on it.

We broke for lunch at a Fish and Chips place, where you got (as a basic meal) 3 pieces of cod and a tonne of chips. Denmark <3

After lunch we faffed about what to do next and we elected upon the Pirate Boats, which ended up being a surprise dark ride (and you’ll never guess the ride it was ripping off). It was actually good if very dark at times due to the way in which the lighting was timed to go off between boats, either way I like dark rides that appear from nowhere and this one is no exception, even the duck enjoyed it.

The final coaster of the day was Timber Ride, another Zierer coaster, which was well landscaped and themed but that was about it. We wondered over to the 4D Cinema to see when the Chima show was on, and had ages, so we elected for the Atlantis attraction.

About the only Merlin thing in the park (no, serious), this is a walk-through Sea-Life with crap pre-show (we and the Danish family with us walked out) and a very well themed experience, with lots of buttons that activated bubbles in various figures. There were also Spider-Crabs, everyone loves them right?

We then decided to do Mini-Land, which was the usual high standard you’d expect of a Lego park. We also did the Observation Tower, Lego Top to faff around and get some decent overall views of the park.

Way too many photos to choose from on this one

We ended up back in the Western area and decided to go on Mine Train, which is literally a train going through a mine. It had a mini dark ride section with a non Lego figure within (the HORROR) and was rather pointless if I’m honest. Lego Canoe was done by myself and Nicky, and was a rather boring Log Flume that went past a few animal figures with a singular drop. I might have fallen asleep mid-ride.

After the faff it was time for Legends of Chima 4D, new for 2013 and a tie into the new range. I have no idea what was going on and it was even in English. It centred around a tour of the land and featured very basic 3D and 4D effects, and the two main characters were friends, then enemies. It made no sense. Then Mark said he thought they were fighting of Cheese rather than Chi, which made it funnier, but still no sense was made. To be young and naïve again.

After that we had done pretty much everything we wanted to on park, so a few re-rides on Dragon, Temple, Ice Pilots and Polar X-Plorer were done. Overall Legoland Billund is a very nice park, and the least Merlin of the group, which can only be considered a good thing. We really enjoyed our day there but I sense it’d be absolute hell when packed solid and some of those cattlepen extensions were in use.