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Portaventura Trip Report – Day 1 Travel & Hotel Huge bucket list park for me: PortAventura. I’ve been watching vlogs and reading plenty of reports from PortAventura since a young age, but I’ve just never got around to doing it. They don’t have a huge coaster lineup, and with so many mixed reviews, particularly on operations, it’s never been high up on my list to tick off. I found a great deal on the hotel and flights that worked perfectly, so I booked a solo trip. 3 days and 2 nights, arrive Weds 17th and return on Friday 19th. I bagged return flights from Gatwick for £45, and booked Hotel Roulette for £210 (also got £20 cashback so worked out to £190), which also included 3 days entry at PortAventura and 1 entry for Ferrari Land. Absolute bargain. If it was for 2 people it would’ve been an even better deal as the hotel was the same price. Hotel Roulette is slightly cheaper and allocates you a random hotel - I was allocated El Paso. I got an early flight and arrived in Barcelona at around 11. I arrived at the hotel around 2pm, checked in, dumped my bag and walked straight round to the park. Whats that peeking through the trees. PortAventura First impressions were great. Lovely area of the park with great theme music playing, lots of nice seating and food outlets overlooking the lake. Furious Baco was the first attraction I came across being at the entrance, so I headed straight for the single rider queue. I was sat towards the back on the right side (normally being a single rider you get the left side, but as the group I was allocated with sat there I took the empty seat on the right). The initial launch and pop of airtime at the end of the launch is great. Very unique having the launch on an upwards slant too. But from there, I didn’t enjoy any other part of the layout and it was quite rough. Obviously I needed to ride it more and in different seats to share my thoughts properly. Spoiler: it gets worse. Having just arrived I was pretty eager to get on some more coasters, so I walked past Tutuki Splash then a very long way towards Shambhala and Dragon Khan, B&M land. I had no idea where I was going, just following paths till I found the B&Ms. The views of the 2 B&Ms are stunning. On my approach I noticed Dragon Khan was walk-on, so got straight on. I didn’t know what to expect with this - I love an old B&M but had heard lots about it being rough and showing its age. It looks absolutely stunning with its recent paint job, and I loved the colours of the train. And that roar. You just can’t beat the sound of these old B&Ms. And how did it ride? I absolutely loved it. Thought it rode excellently for an old coaster - I really don’t understand the noise about it being rough. It was very forceful, that zero-g roll in particular was ridiculous. The interlocking corkscrews look great. The cobra roll perfectly placed over the brake run looks stunning. Think I prefer this over Kumba, but hard to say as its now been 10 years since I've been on Kumba. But I don't remember Kumba hitting that hard intensity wise. Went straight back round for another go as I thought it was rude not to with no queue. I was then itching for the big B&M towering above me. I walked round to Shambhala and saw the SRQ was chained off, so joined the main queue which was advertised at 25 minutes, but was on in 20 mins. It wasn’t until I got to the station I realised the SRQ was still in use even though it was chained off - you just had to go over the chain or jump the main queue. That explains why I saw a few people jumping the main queue whilst I was waiting. Anyway. Once again, I didn't know what to expect. Lots of mixed reviews - some love it, some say it’s very overhyped. With all these new Intamins with aggressive airtime, I didn’t know if I was going to like it. I loved this thing. Really loved it. Completely exceeded my expectations. Brilliant first drop, and then floater airtime for pretty much the rest of the layout. The turnaround section is ridiculously forceful, a near grey-out on exit, then straight into a speed hill. My favorite part of the layout. The train design is perfect, I particularly love the ‘outer’ seats which pretty much feel like winged seats. The views from the lift hill are great, and I absolutely love the way the 2 lift hills are placed for this and Khan. So unique, and you get some funny interactions when they’re dispatched at similar times. Lots of waves. The splashdown was off but was randomly turned on midway through Thursday. Good fun on the outer seats and you can touch the water. Pretty much a flawless coaster for me and I decided pretty early on this is my favourite B&M. Nice to have a B&M back in my top 10 😃 After a couple more rides using the ‘closed’ SRQ, I continued to wander round the park and came across Hurakan Condor. I love a drop tower, particularly these Intamin ones. It’s brilliantly themed. I didn’t realize the roof was actually a bit tilted until I saw it in person for the first time. Had to Google if it was meant to be like that 🤣 I entered the queue which was very short, and there was no one waiting in the SRQ so I went for that. I was quite surprised to see all 5 towers operating, after seeing other people report it being on 2–3 in peak summer. I had 3 quick rides using the SRQ, first one being standard sit down and the other 2 being stand up tilt. Great drop tower with great views. I didn’t actually realize how huge this thing is until I was there. Bit of a shame you can’t pick to stand up or sit down, even if you were to go in the main queue. I do love the atmosphere around drop towers - it’s always the one ride at a theme park which scares people. Lots of people getting to the front of the queue and requesting the sit-down tower is quite amusing to watch 🤣 I continued to explore and stumbled into the Wild West area. Beautifully themed. I jumped straight on Stampida (blue side) and had no idea what to expect. I do like that you can choose which side in the queue. Groups together were going separately so they can race. It was not very enjoyable at all unfortunately. Very rough/jolty. Shame as it’s a fantastic layout (John Wardley classic), I particularly like the bit where the 2 trains go towards each other. But yeah, too rough to enjoy any of it really. Next up I wanted to try Uncharted. It was advertised at 50 mins, and unfortunately has no SRQ as that’s been replaced by an express queue. Shame this wasn’t designed with both, seeing as it’s a new ride. Even though it had the highest queue on park (which was a running trend) I just went for it as I know it had a terrible capacity and wasn’t likely to change. I hadn’t actually seen much about this coaster so didn’t know what to expect. The exterior and the indoor queue are both fantastic. Very highly themed. It’s a decent ride. The ride system is absolutely fantastic, really comfy trains and fun launches, and it’s brilliant how the ride vehicle rotates. However the theming on ride is dire. It’s just a dark building with a couple of screens. And I really hate that you can see the track in front of you so you know what’s coming. It’s a fairly short ride too, but the main problem is the theming for me. Big shame as that ride has a lot of potential. Fantastic ride system though so I look forward to seeing what other parks do with them. And that was it for my first day. It was about half 5 so I still had half an hour till queues closed, but Ferrari Land opened at half 4 and Red Force was calling my name. Ferrari Land There was only 1 reason I was bothered about Ferrari Land, Red Force, obviously. Walking into the park, everything looked very new and clean, as you’d expect from a fairly new park. Walking towards Red Force, you can’t help but notice the noise it makes. It’s so loud - love it. Sounds like a plane taking off every couple minutes, very fitting with it being Ferrari Land. I headed straight for the SRQ, walking past huge cattle pens almost backed up to the entrance. Main queue was advertised at 30 minutes which was nonsense. Later on in the evening when the queue was 1/3 of the size it was advertised at 1 hour and 20 mins. Strange as they seemed fairly accurate in Portaventura, most of the time. In Ferrari Land though, they were always wrong. This park seriously needs more capacity though. Queues like that on an 'off peak' day. Amazingly, I only waited 15 minutes in the SRQ, and even more amazingly I lucked out and got allocated the front row on my first ride. Thanks to 2 out of a group of 3 being too scared for the front. Unfortunately you have to wear glasses on the front, similar to Energylandia, but that didn’t take away from the ride too much. It’s a great coaster, the launch is fantastic, particularly at the end of the launch you can really feel the LSMs kick in. I love that there isn’t a pause either — straight out the station into a launch. Amazing views on the top hat. No airtime at the top as it goes over very slowly, but you do get some great views. This is the tallest coaster I’ve done and it feels like it when you’re up there. You then have a brilliant drop, and a nice pop of airtime before going into the brakes. I went round another 4 times all in SRQ and was allocated row 5 the first 3 times, then lucked out and got another front row ride. It is a great coaster, but I couldn’t help but feel a little underwhelmed by it. The launch is great, but it really doesn’t have that same kick to it as the hydraulic launches. Which does make me sad I never got to do TTD or Ka in their original forms 💔 It’s a little rough too. Unless you’re on the front row, it shakes a lot the further you get down that launch track, and it isn’t comfortable. I probably prefer Stealth, purely due to the acceleration and it not being rough, but Red Force is still a fantastic coaster and does create a fantastic atmosphere in Ferrari Land. As I mentioned earlier, the noise that thing makes is incredible. On my 5th ride, whilst I was in the airgate, it had a short breakdown. The train advanced onto the launch track but didn’t launch. But it was dealt with quickly - engineers arrived and reversed it back into the station. They sent the train and it was back in operation, all within 10 mins. After 5 laps, I headed over to the Thrill Towers which were walk-on. This park really filters out as time goes on. It gets really busy at PortAventura park close (6pm), but it seems most people go in the park and have 1 lap on Red Force then leave. Except people like me 🤣 1 of the towers is on the ‘shot’ setting and the other is on the drop setting. You don’t get to choose, you just randomly get allocated one. I had 1 go on each. The shot tower was okay but I’ve definitely done better, the drop one was really good though. Very forceful. There wasn’t long left till park close at 10pm, so I decided to spend the rest of the evening on Red Force. The main queue was empty so I just used that, and managed 3 rides which were all in row 2. This also included another 10 minute breakdown, just a quick reset from engineers. This thing is absolutely incredible at night. There was such a good atmosphere too - the only people left in the park were all lapping it, and the staff on offload were encouraging us to run round to get a last ride in. I was on the 2nd-to-last train and everyone was clapping and cheering. Great fun. I then wandered back over to the hotel, had some fajitas in the restaurant (open till 11) which were nice, and went to sleep ready for a full day in the park tomorrow. Wrap up & Operations What a great first day. I just couldn’t believe how nice the park was and instantly fell in love with it - the pathways, landscaping, music, and views all create such a nice atmosphere. The weather was perfect too. Food was reasonably priced for a theme park, though drinks were very expensive. I wizzed round and got a feel for the park in the short time I had there so was looking forward to spending a full day there on Thursday. And the operations? Honestly, better than I expected. I’d heard horror stories, but on my trip it wasn’t too bad at all. I imagine busy days would be different, but I didn’t see much queue jumping or overuse of express. Furious Baco: 2/2 trains Shambhala & Dragon Khan: 2/3 on each (a third wouldn’t have helped, they were stacking). They had all 3 available as they were swapped throughout the 3 days. Hurakan Condor: 5/5 towers Stampida: 1/2 on each side (but didn’t need more) Uncharted: 3/3 trains Red Force: 2 trains (not sure if it can run 3). Again all 3 were available as they were swapped on Thursday. The big issue is Red Force. It’s the headline attraction and it draws a huge crowd, but dispatches averaged around 90 seconds — only about 480 pph. That’s terrible, especially once you factor in express and disabled access. Stealth dispatches faster, even with more seats and seatbelts to check. Red Force needs a better baggage system if they want to seriously increase throughput. They should also advance trains into the station quicker - waiting for the train to clear the top hat each time kills throughput. I didn't see any breakdowns all day apart from the 2 short breakdowns on Red Force. Will write up Day 2 & 3 soon with thoughts on the rest of the park and thoughts on re-rides.

2nd July 2026: Disneyland Paris After a successful trip to Parc Astérix on Monday and trips in between to Paris and Versailles, we headed to another theme park (well, duo of theme parks) today; we visited Disneyland Paris! Now unlike Parc Astérix on Monday, I had visited Disneyland Paris prior to today, but this was over 15 years ago, so my memories of it were quite vague. I was also under 8 years old on my first visit, so there were also numerous attractions that I was either too short to ride, too scared to ride or both on my first visit, so I was excited to experience some of these, as well as attractions I’d remembered from my first visit! And it’s also been over 7 years since I’ve been to a Disney park full stop, so it was interesting to visit some Disney parks again! Now, I should say before I get into this report that we did only spend 1 day across both parks, so this was very much a flying visit and our visit plan was designed around key highlights and things we hadn’t done previously in either Paris or Orlando. I’m aware that this is not really how Disney is designed to be visited, so the report should be taken with this in mind. Anticipating that the roads could be busy and wanting to start early, we headed out of our house at around 8:15am, arriving at Disneyland Paris just after 9am in time for the 9:30am opening and starting our day in Disneyland Park: Upon entering the park, we decided to start on a key memorable highlight of our previous visit… Big Thunder Mountain Big Thunder Mountain was on an advertised 55 minute queue time, so as it had been a key memorable attraction from our previous visit to Disneyland Paris, we decided to have a ride on there to start our day. The 55 minute advertised queue time ended up being overstated, with us getting on within 40 minutes after a relatively fast queue; I can never moan about that! So, how was the ride? Well, 8 year old me had this ride down as being the absolute best thing ever, so naturally as someone who has now ridden far more coasters, I did not expect it to live up to my childhood memories and I did not hold the same view as I did in 2011, but it was still a very good fun family coaster nonetheless! I was sat in row 3, and as you’d expect, it was along much the same lines as its equivalent in Florida; very much a pink-knuckle ride, with not too much going on in terms of intensity, but offering a really good, fun experience with some fun twists and turns, areas of mild speed and tickles where it threatens airtime. As family mine train coasters go, I do think it’s a strong example; I would perhaps place it slightly higher than the Florida version, but not notably so. All in all, then, Thunder Mountain was an enjoyable way to start the day and it was very nice to get back on there after 15 years; we certainly all enjoyed ourselves, although my mum did comment that 15 years and many more thrilling coasters ridden had “ruined good, fun rides like that for [her]”: After Thunder Mountain, me, my mum and my dad headed to another ride in the area that we hadn’t previously ridden… Phantom Manor Phantom Manor was on an advertised 5 minute queue time, so as none of us had ever done it previously, we decided to take a ride on there. We pretty much walked straight into the stretching room, so pleasingly, the queue time was short as promised; in a park like Disney, it’s never a bad thing to have a 5 minute queue! For context, I hadn’t ridden Phantom Manor previously because me and my sister were both scaredy cat children and wouldn’t ride it when we were 8 and 10 respectively, so it was interesting to get on it today. My sister still wouldn’t ride it today, as she doesn’t go for loud noises and scary things. So, how was it? Well, having ridden Haunted Mansion in Orlando 7 years ago, I was interested to see how Phantom Manor compared, and I would say that similarly, it was quite a nice ride with lots to look at and some nice scenes, and it did seem a little bit more polished and story-driven than Florida’s version. The stretching room pre-show also seemed more impressive than Florida’s, and both my parents said this was the most remarkable bit of the attraction for them. It’s a fairly gentle affair, with nothing too scary for the faint of heart (I.e. me!), and I thought it was quite a nice ride overall, if not a top, top dark ride for me, although my dad thought it was “dull”: After getting off Phantom Manor, we met back up with my sister and moved to Adventureland to complete our next unridden attraction… Indiana Jones et le Temple du Peril Indiana Jones was on an advertised 20 minute queue time, so as none of us had ridden it previously, we decided to give it a go. My sister and I were too small to ride it on our previous visit 15 years ago, so we were all interested to try it, and the queue took 20-25 minutes as advertised, so none of us could complain! So, how was it? Well, I was seated in row 5, and we sadly didn’t miss much on our first visit, as this was absolutely terrible! The ride had very old-fashioned OTSRs and seemed to bash your head around horribly whenever it turned faster than about 10mph, but to make matters worse, I didn’t even think the layout was anything that interesting; it felt like there was basically a loop and an awful lot of filler around it, with multiple very dead sections. All in all, I was glad to have ticked off Indiana Jones, but I don’t think any of us would lose sleep if we didn’t go back on it any time soon: After Indiana Jones, my plan originally put Pirates of the Caribbean on the agenda, but it was unfortunately closed for maintenance, so at my mum’s request, we instead headed into Fantasyland to ride a different dark boat ride… It’s a Small World It’s a Small World was on an advertised 5 minute queue, so as it’s a quintessential classic Disney attraction, we decided to have a ride on there. As we were boarding, it looked as though many people were watching the parade, so we managed to pretty much walk on the ride; I can never moan about that! So, how was it? Well, I had previously ridden the version in Orlando and found it delightfully twee, and I had similar thoughts here. As much as it might not be anything intense or earth-shattering, there is something strangely enjoyable about riding through rooms of animatronics singing and dancing in different languages… it’s a nice, gentle little ride that we all enjoyed! My dad also thought it looked a bit newer and more polished than the Orlando equivalent, which I agreed with: After getting off It’s a Small World, we took a walk around Fantasyland and the Sleeping Beauty gallery in the castle before heading into Discoveryland to ride our final unridden coaster in Disneyland Park… Star Wars Hyperspace Mountain Hyperspace Mountain was on an advertised 50 minute queue, so as none of us had ever ridden it before, we decided to take a ride. I was too small to ride it in 2011, and my noise-phobic sister bailed out as a child upon seeing that the ride launched out of a cannon, so it was new to all 4 of us! The queue was broadly accurate, with us waiting 55 minutes to ride, but might I just say that Hyperspace Mountain might be the most half-hearted retheme I’ve ever seen. The ride is supposedly themed to Star Wars, but externally and pre-ride, it’s very much still Jules Verne-themed aside from a few flags and stickers in the queue (which was also surprisingly bland in general given how beautiful and detailed the building exterior is… was it originally better?). Internally, it’s better, with a bit of Star Wars music and audio and some screens making the theme more convincing, but even then, I definitely saw plenty of calling cards of Jules Verne left in there… I’m no die-hard nostalgic, but I feel like the ride must surely be crying out for a return to a Jules Verne theme at some point! But that’s enough about the theme; how was the ride itself? Well, I was intrigued to try the French Space Mountain because while I’d ridden the version in Orlando, that is a lot tamer whereas Paris’ version is a proper launched thrill ride closer to Rock’n’Rollercoaster in style. I was sat in row 9, and I have to say that I did find it a more impressive ride than its Floridian counterpart, with a fun launch and some good speed and inversions, but it definitely isn’t the smoothest of things! The vest restraints make it less uncomfortable than it might have been, and it was hardly brain-melting to the extent of, say, Goudurix, but it was definitely a little bit on the rougher side in places, which did require some defensive riding when combined with the darkness. Even still, it was a fun coaster and I’m glad to have ridden it, even if Thunder Mountain is perhaps still my preferred coaster within Disneyland Park: After getting off Hyperspace Mountain, we ended our time in Disneyland Park for the day, heading out for lunch in Disney Village to break up our day: After lunch, we began the second stage of our day with a visit to Disney Adventure World, which was the more drastically altered park compared to our previous visit: Upon entering Adventure World, I had originally planned for us to start on Tower of Terror, but the queue times in Avengers Campus were looking more favourable, so we instead decided to start on… Spider-Man WEB Adventure Spider-Man was on an advertised 35 minute queue, so as it was a new ride since our previous visit, we decided to give it a whirl. This proved to be a grave error, as the queue time was grossly underestimated and we ended up waiting 75 minutes in what must have been one of the slowest-feeling queues I’ve waited in for some time. I’m not sure what made it so slow, but it seemed to take forever, perhaps not helped by the queue not being the most interesting by Disney standards, with it mostly consisting of painted walls and cattle pens! So, how was the ride after our unexpectedly long wait? Well, I thought it was quite good fun; the shooting technology is quite novel, the 3D was good, and while the ride is mostly screen-based, the novelty of the shooting tech makes for an interesting ride! It’s not a patch on the superb Spider-Man dark ride in Universal Orlando for me, and it perhaps wasn’t worth a 75 minute wait, but similarly to Ninjago at Legoland, I thought it was a fun dark ride with clever shooting technology and good 3D: After getting off Spider-Man, we headed for the other ride in Avengers Campus… Avengers Assemble: Flight Force Flight Force was on an advertised 30 minute queue time, so me, my dad and my sister decided to take a ride. Now of all the rides on offer at Disneyland Paris, this was the one I was most insistent on riding at some point during the day, and there’s a bit of a personal backstory behind that. On my visit 15 years ago, I was tall enough to ride Rock’n’Rollercoaster (as it was then known, and as I kept repeatedly calling it today!), but I refused to ride because a classmate of mine at primary school told me that it gave him tummy ache after he rode it… so I didn’t ride it all trip and I’ve been slightly bitter about that missed coaster ever since, particularly after my family told me about how brilliant it was! I later managed to ride the Orlando version some 8 years later, but I’ve always been keen to return to Disneyland Paris and redeem that missed coaster credit, so I was insistent that I wouldn’t leave the resort today without riding it! The queue for this took 35-40 minutes, and I have to say that it was a somewhat more interesting queue than that for Spider-Man, with some videos and a pre-show with a very cool Iron Man animatronic! So, how did Flight Force stack up after 15 years of regretting not riding it? Did the experience live up to the personal thrill of finally redeeming my 8 year old self and (indirectly) giving my primary school classmate his comeuppance? Well, I remembered the Orlando version of this coaster being a really decent coaster in 2019, and this was decent as well; it’s probably my personal favourite Disney coaster! I was seated on the front row, and in terms of some particular highlights; that launch is excellently punchy for an LSM launch and if I didn’t know any better, I’d have said it felt almost like a hydraulic launch, and the ride also carries its speed well and has some good, forceful inversions! As well as this, the ride also isn’t overly rough either, being notably smoother than Hyperspace Mountain earlier in the day, which makes for an enjoyable thrill coaster and a nice headline coaster for the Disney resort overall! All in all, then, I was glad to finally get on Rock’n’Rollercoaster (it’ll always be Rock’n’Rollercoaster to me regardless of the Avengers theme!), and the ride itself was about as good as I’d remembered from Orlando, which was pleasing: After Flight Force, we headed to another new ride that none of us had ridden anywhere previously… Ratatouille Ratatouille was on an advertised 55 minute queue time, so as it was new since our last visit and we also haven’t visited Walt Disney World recently enough to have experienced it in Epcot, we decided to take a ride on there as we were all interested in seeing it. The queue was understated and took around 45 minutes despite being nearly to the ride entrance, which I can never complain about! So, how was it? Well, I thought it was quite an interesting ride! There were some good bits of physical scenery in there, even if the ride is predominantly screen-based, the animation sequences were generally quite good, and the spinning and interaction between the cars was quite a cool touch! They also very much liked the water squirter in there! One thing I did think, though, is that unlike some rides with lengthy movement sequences in front of one screen (I would give Street Mission at PortAventura and Snorri Touren at Europa Park as examples), I thought the screen sequences felt quite static and less like you were believably moving around; I’m not sure whether this was down to reduced car movement or something else, but it was something I noticed. All in all, then, I thought Ratatouille was quite a good, fun dark ride, and I’m glad we got to experience it for the first time: After getting off Ratatouille, it was gone 5:30pm and my family were starting to flag, so I was told I could ride one more attraction. As such, me and my dad went to ride a favourite of mine from Orlando… Tower of Terror Tower of Terror was on an advertised 45 minute queue time, so as I absolutely loved the Florida version and had never done Paris’ before (me and my sister were too scared to ride it in 2011), I was keen to give it a go. The queue time was broadly accurate, with us waiting around 45 minutes for our ride, although we did have an interesting experience upon boarding in that our lift broke down and had to be brought back to the area for a restraint recheck; that was intriguing! So, how was the ride? Well, I loved Tower of Terror in Orlando 7 years ago to the extent where I would have easily declared it my favourite Disney attraction and quite possibly my favourite non-roller coaster attraction full stop, and riding the Paris version reminded me of the brilliance of these rides. They’re still easily Disney’s top rides for me; the unrestricted airtime is absolutely incredible, and the wonderful theming, story and ambience adds quite a unique dimension to the whole experience compared to a regular drop tower! This version, unlike the one in Florida, was also quite interesting in that it had a spooky little girl appearing in each scene and adding comments; that was a nice touch that I wasn’t necessarily expecting! All in all, then, it was great to get on Paris’ Tower of Terror; this attraction really is wonderful, and definitely some of Disney’s finest work, in my view: After getting off Tower of Terror, it was gone 6:30pm and my family were incredibly keen to go home, so we called it a day there and headed out: So, that brings a close to our day at Disneyland Paris! I had a really good day; it was interesting to return to the parks 15 years after my last visit, and despite us not managing the full day, I managed to get on most of what I’d planned to (I had also pencilled in Frozen and Crush’s Coaster in Adventure World, but my family decided it wasn’t an issue not to ride these as we rode Frozen in Orlando and we rode Crush’s Coaster on our last visit 15 years ago), including everything that was new to me! I do think that doing both parks in a day was slightly ambitious, in retrospect, and I acknowledge that I was perhaps unable to give Disney the chance to show its full potential. Rides-wise, my highlight was easily Tower of Terror, but I also enjoyed getting on some of the other rides I’ve never done before, with Flight Force being a key favourite of those, and getting back on things like Thunder Mountain too. In terms of my thoughts on the Paris Disney resort; I thought Disneyland Park was overall a fair amount nicer to walk around than the Magic Kingdom in Orlando, with lots more little details to look at and a general more polished feel, and I also thought that some of the rides were better like-for-like (e.g. Space Mountain, Thunder Mountain, Phantom Manor). Disney Adventure World was also nicer than I remembered, and some of the new additions are really good. Both parks, particularly Adventure World, are surprisingly thin on rides, and I do think that some new attractions in both would not go amiss. My dad said that “both parks put together were smaller than Parc Astérix on Monday”, and while I’m not sure I agree with that statement, I would agree that neither park is particularly big individually. What I will say Disney does well, though, is making the environment very nice to walk around and be in. Disneyland Park in particular is a supremely pleasant environment with lots to look at, lots of little details and no visual expense spared, and it does make for a pleasant park to be in. I found it much nicer to look at and be in than the Magic Kingdom, which I wasn’t necessarily expecting. The Disney parks do feel very premium and like real “spectacle” parks in the same way as the Disney and Universal resorts in Orlando do. Of the two theme park days we’ve had in France this week, I would argue that our group perhaps got more out of Parc Astérix on Monday, and while you can fairly argue that we perhaps didn’t let Disney show its full potential, I think what it partly boils down to is that Disneyland Paris isn’t really designed for us, and I should probably elaborate a little on what I mean. My dad argued that this is because the parks are pitched primarily at families with young children, but I disagree; I think it’s that they cater more to fans of Disney than fans of theme parks. If you are a die-hard Disney fan and you love all the magic and pixie dust and characters, you’ll absolutely love it, but we are an older group and not absolute die-hard Disney fans, so we maybe feel less of a connection to the product. I’ve long felt similarly about the Disney parks in Orlando; I really like the parks, don’t get me wrong, but they don’t excite me like the Universal parks or some other places do. With all that said, it was fun to return to Disneyland Paris and we had a good day! Thanks for reading; I hope you’ve enjoyed this report! I don’t know when my next theme park trip will be or where it will be to, but I’m sure I’ll go somewhere else before too long, so keep your eyes peeled!

29th June 2026: Parc Astérix Today was an exciting day; after months (well, years) of UK park visiting, I had my first foreign park visit since September 2024, and it was to a very exciting park; today was my first ever visit to Parc Astérix in France! I couldn’t wait to get on the rides for the first time, particularly Toutatis! We’re currently staying in a house somewhere broadly between Parc Astérix and Disneyland Paris (that’s coming later in the week), so we left this morning at around 9am and arrived at Parc Astérix just after 9:30am in time for a quick entry into the park ready for rope drop. First impressions were good; it definitely has nicer theming than I was expecting! I had it in my head that it might be a more Busch Gardens Tampa-style affair with relatively minimal theming, but the park is very nicely kept and has some really good theming!: After rope drop at 10am, I initially directed us toward Toutatis. I wanted to get it done early, and my first ride at Astérix was to be my 150th roller coaster, so I also had hopes of continuing my streak of notable milestone coasters after hitting #100 on Iron Gwazi in 2023. Alas, this was not to be, as the ride appeared non-operational and the queue was enormous, so we decided to bail after 15 minutes or so of not moving and start our day elsewhere: After this slight disappointment, we instead started our day on… Trace du Hourra Trace du Hourra was on an advertised 30 minute queue time, so as it was right next to Toutatis and open, we decided to take a ride. Pleasingly, the queue was exactly 30 minutes as advertised, and might I also say that I’ve never seen such rapid and mesmerising operations on a ride of this genre (yes, even on Schweizer Bobbahn at Europa Park!). They were frequently whacking trains out at 40-45 second intervals, and I honestly think that my throughput timings of 1,046pph and 1,090pph were somewhat harsh assessments of the situation; the trains were flying out, and there were points where watching it was almost like clockwork. When one train left the lift hill, another was right there ready to go up! It certainly put the 200pph or so Avalanche was getting on my last Blackpool visit to shame, anyhow… so, how was my first Parc Astérix coaster? Well, I quite like a good bobsled coaster, and Trace du Hourra was indeed a fun one! I was sat at the very front, and there were some good bits of speed and some fun twisty sections, and it wasn’t too rattly either! As for how I’d rank it relative to other bobsled coasters; I’d tentatively place it comfortably ahead of Schweizer Bobbahn, but perhaps not quite as highly as Avalanche. While it’s long and picks up some very good speed in areas, there are quite a few block brakes, which means you don’t ever quite amass the continuous feeling of speed that Avalanche offers. All in all, though, Trace du Hourra was a fun start to the day, and a good #150 even if not the one I was perhaps hoping for: After Trace du Hourra, we headed for something slightly bigger and more notable… Oz’Iris Oz’Iris was on an advertised 50 minute queue time, so while the queue was bursting out of the entrance, we decided to trust the queue time board and have a go on there as it was a major ride and a logical place to progress to. I was pleasantly surprised by the indoor queue for this, and once again, the queue time was pleasingly pretty accurate, with us waiting around 55 minutes in a queue that moved quite quickly. I had it in my head that Parc Astérix might have slightly shaky operations, but Oz’Iris was operated well and the queue moved at a very good rate. Oz’Iris also introduced us to a very odd recurring procedure at Parc Astérix; on numerous rides, the park likes you to put your loose articles in a trolley. I’m not sure how I feel about it; it does mean that things move quickly on the platform, but it’s a bit of a faff to rifle around looking for your bag when you get off! Anyhow, how was the actual ride experience? Well, I was interested to ride a new B&M invert, as while it’s one of my most ridden models, I actually haven’t ridden a new one in almost 10 years, and my opinion of the genre has changed a fair amount since then. Having predominantly ridden the two Nemesises (Nemesi?) since 2016, I have to say that my row 7 ride on Oz’Iris was absolutely superb and definitely had me crowning a new favourite B&M invert; it was fantastic, and perhaps controversially, I would say that it quite comfortably exceeded any recent ride I’ve had on either Nemesis (and my increasingly hazy recollections of Montu, my previous top-ranked invert) and I would place the ride within my overall top 15! In terms of what puts it at the top of the B&M invert pile for me; it’s got excellent forces and speed without ever being overbearing, is quite long and is impeccably smooth, but also has a very different and unique layout for a B&M invert. The sequencing is very different to any of the others I’ve ridden and offers a very nice flow, the various twists and overbanks provide some different and fun sensations compared to what you typically find on a B&M invert, it felt like there was more float in the inversions and I even thought I felt an odd little bit of airtime in one section! All in all, then, I loved Oz’Iris and was definitely happy to crown a new top B&M invert; it’s nice to see that a B&M invert still has the capability to surprise me after all this time!: After getting off Oz’Iris, me, my mum and my sister ticked off a much less notable coaster credit in the immediate vicinity… SOS Tournevis SOS Tournevis was seemingly walk-on, so while it wasn’t really a priority for me, I decided to tick it off anyway. The three of us were seated on the ride within 5 minutes, which we can never complain about! Interestingly (and I noticed this on Trace du Hourra as well), the staff member didn’t check our lap bars; they clearly have faith in their ride hardware! So, how was it? Well, I was sat on the back, and it was fun for a small coaster if not earth-shattering, just as the identical Cat-O-Pillar at Paultons Park was last month. These models have a surprising jolt of airtime on the first drop, and this particular example was also hardly braking and sent us flying around the pre-lift turn on the second lap, which was a fun touch! So all in all, then, it was good to get another credit ticked off: After SOS Tournevis, we headed back to a ride we’d just passed… Cetautomatix Cetautomatix was on an advertised 45 minute queue time, but as my family were not keen on doing a spinning coaster, I decided to take advantage of a secret weapon… the single rider queue! With it being such a frequent asset in the UK, I took a gamble on French single rider… and this proved to be a prudent gamble, as I was batched straight into a pre-boarding queue with a French family of 3 and waited no more than 5 minutes to board; I can’t possibly moan about that! Once again, the operations were phenomenally slick on here, with a non-stop conveyor belt of cars and routine 20-second dispatches; excellent work! So, how was the ride? Well, I’d never ridden a Gerstlauer spinning coaster before, and while I’m not the world’s biggest lover of spinning coasters, I would have to say that I thoroughly enjoyed it! The ride span well without spinning excessively, was pretty long and had some fun twists and turns, with the added fun surprise of a mid-ride tyre launch! I would say the inward-facing seating was mildly awkward for me as a single rider riding with people I didn’t know, but that’s a very minor niggle and doesn’t really take away from the actual ride experience. All in all, then, I definitely enjoyed Cetautomatix and would probably say that it’s surpassed Storm Chaser at Paultons Park as my favourite spinning coaster; it was very good fun, for sure: After getting off Cetautomatix, I met back up with my family and we headed to ride my most anticipated ride of the day after our earlier failure… Toutatis I figured that the queue for Toutatis probably wasn’t going to get any shorter and we were all increasingly keen to do it, so we decided to brave the advertised 55 minute queue and see how we got on. As with Oz’Iris, the queue was bursting out of the entrance (it took us 15 minutes to get through the actual entrance), and it seemed to move more slowly than the other queues, but it was again broadly accurate and took us around 60 minutes to board. As a stray observation, I did notice that a lot of the internal queue lines at Parc Astérix seem quite short, compared to the number of people that wait and the queue times, as both Toutatis and Oz’Iris were bursting out of their queue lines without excessive queue times and Zeus was on the cusp when we rode that later in the day. Why is this, I wonder? Anyway, that’s enough about the queue; how was the ride? Well, Toutatis was my most anticipated ride of our trip to France and probably my most anticipated ride since riding Shambhala in 2024; with VelociCoaster at Islands of Adventure being my present #1, I was hotly anticipating a ride of a similar style! And my word, it did not disappoint! I was sat in row 8, and I don’t even quite know where to begin in reviewing it as there’s quite a lot to unpick… the ride starts with a nice punchy launch, and while the initial sections don’t look like much on a POV, I was actually very surprised at how potent they were; the zero-g stall is superb and provides some wonderful hangtime, and the undulations are surprisingly forceful! And then the ride kicks things up a notch… I’ve ridden swing launches before, and the one on Ice Breaker in particular was really good fun, but this was something else entirely; the forwards and backwards airtime is absolutely obscene, and when combined with the launching sensation and the wonderful sustained floater airtime of the backwards spike as well (which is far superior to the junior scorpion tails on Ice Breaker and Mandrill Mayhem), it makes for an absolute riot and quite possibly one of the strongest sequences of roller coaster I’ve ever experienced! And then you’ve got an entire layout afterwards; I was ever so slightly disappointed with the top hat compared to VelociCoaster’s, with the anticipation stall making for slightly weaker airtime, but every part of the ensuing layout hits and hits hard! The sense of speed is absolutely absurd, the forces are sublime, and there are many, many great elements here, including another superb zero-g stall, an absolutely wicked ejector airtime hill that hurls you out of the seat, a fast roll, some quick airtime bursts and even some turns that look inconsequential on a POV but provide surprising airtime and force on the actual ride! You could almost fill a book with good things about Toutatis, and many elements deserve a fair amount of words in their own right, but overall, the ride is absolutely sublime, top-drawer, a masterpiece, whatever brilliant adjective you can think of, with airtime, speed, smoothness, comfort, intensity and everything you could possibly ask for. I’m not going to provide an impulsive ranking or make an impulsive statement after this first ride, but what I will say is that given I’ve often been slightly underwhelmed by big hitters on the first go as of late, this was a very strong instant sale from the get go with the full euphoria, crying with laughter and shaking, head in hands wonder from the very first ride, which made me feel incredibly gratified and made me think that a top 3 placement at minimum was very probable. The full tale of Toutatis is to be continued later, as I’ve learned you can never fully judge a big hitter after just one ride: After getting off Toutatis, we headed in the direction of the other part of the park, getting some tasty pizza sandwiches for lunch. After this, we headed to our next coaster… Goudurix Goudurix was on an advertised 20 minute queue time, so me and my sister gave it a whirl, with my mum and dad sitting this one out in anticipation of a headbanger. Once again, the queue time for this was pleasingly accurate, with us waiting exactly 20 minutes for our ride as promised. So, how was it? Well, my sister and I had been discussing pleasantly surprising rides prior to boarding Goudurix, where I reminisced on experiences such as Hagrid’s… and all I’ll say is that at the end of Goudurix, she turned to me with a pained look and simply said “that was not one of those pleasantly surprising rides we were talking about before, was it?”. My word, old Vekoma produced some absolute trash, and Goudurix is a fine example of this! It actually has a fairly decent layout, with that first butterfly element in particular pulling some surprisingly good g-forces, but it is just hideously rough, with so much of it spent being banged around in the restraints. One mild saving grace was that it had vest restraints, which did mean that our ears got off a little more lightly than they might have done otherwise (I think the ride might have been almost Infusion or Odyssey-level dire with regular Vekoma OTSRs)… but it was not a good ride. All in all, then, Goudurix was a ride my sister and I were both quite content only riding once; I’m glad to have done it, but I won’t lose too much sleep if I never do it again: After Goudurix, we met back up with my parents and moved onto our next major coaster… Tonnerre 2 Zeus We couldn’t quite decide whether Tonnerre 2 Zeus was on a 35 minute or 45 minute advertised queue time (we were discussing conflicting figures), but we decided to join it anyway. This queue line was quite possibly the most wasp-infested I have ever seen, probably due to the abundance of lavender within it, and we also got a good view of the ride and saw that areas of it were shaking possibly more than I’ve ever seen on any woodie (potentially an omen for the ride experience…). As with Mine Blower at Fun Spot, the Timberliner trains also produced an absolute racket negotiating the circuit that almost sounds a bit like Santa’s sleigh at Christmas (again, potentially an omen for the ride experience…). We ultimately waited 45 minutes for our ride, which was in line with one of our estimates… we weren’t sure if the queue was as advertised or 10 seconds over! So, how was it? Well, Tonnerre 2 Zeus is a ride I was, to say the least, incredibly intrigued to experience. I knew it was a big woodie and that it had been retracked fairly recently, which are usually good signs, but I also knew that the ride was deeply, deeply polarising. People either seem to think it’s the best thing ever or absolutely loathe it. I went in with low expectations, as I’d heard it was pretty rough and I don’t generally like rough coasters, but I have to say that the ride really surprised me… I sat in row 12, and I think I absolutely loved it! Now the reason I sound quite tentative is because Tonnerre 2 Zeus is one of those rides that made me question everything I thought I knew about my own taste in coasters, and it’s possibly the most undecided I’ve been getting off a ride. It’s quite unlike any other woodie, heck, any other coaster full stop, I’ve ever been on, and I’m finding it quite hard to fully decide where I stand on it, so prepare for me to talk quite a lot. I’ll start with the layout, which is easier to discuss. Layout-wise, it’s absolutely superb; the ride absolutely hauls its way through a long layout that never lets up and is filled with speed, intensity, airtime moments and excitement. On layout alone, I think it would be in my top 10 and most likely usurping Wodan as my top woodie, and if it had been retracked GCI-style like GhostRider or retracked with pre-cut track and the PTCs still in place like Megafobia, I think I would have an easier time placing it there. As with Mine Blower, the fact remains that I do not particularly rate those Timberliner restraints. I think they impede the airtime moments so you don’t feel them as strongly as you would on a GCI or PTC train, and if the ride had freer-feeling trains, I think I’d have an easier time putting it straight in the top 10. There’s a whole other aspect to discuss, though… smoothness. Now the ride is absolutely not glossy smooth in the same way as a GCI coaster like Wodan or Wicker Man… but it isn’t uncomfortably, painfully rough throughout in the miserable, horrible way that Grand National or Stampida are either and was generally a lot less uncomfortable or painful than I was fearing. It has its jarring moments, and in one sense, the ride feels incredibly rough, but in an odd way that… wasn’t necessarily uncomfortable or painful at all. I’m not even sure rough is the right word… I’d almost say raw or unrestrained. This was my first time riding a particularly large coaster with Timberliners (Mine Blower is quite small), and it felt utterly unhinged quite unlike any other woodie I’ve ever ridden in a way that’s quite hard to describe. It was deafeningly loud throughout (unlike any other coaster I’ve ever ridden… I couldn’t hear myself think!), and the whole thing just felt like a complete riot that I couldn’t help but crease up at in one sense… my family widely used terms like “unsafe-feeling” and “thought it was going to come off the track”, but they seemed to have similar thoughts. All in all, then, I think I loved Zeus and would rate it highly… but I remain slightly tentative on where exactly to stand on it. As I’ve rambled on for a fair time, I’m fairly sure it doesn’t beat Wodan as my favourite woodie, and my head would tentatively put it a bit below Wicker Man as well as I think I find that a bit more easily rerideable and fun and less objectively flawed… but Zeus was absolutely mental with a cracking layout, and part of me thinks it deserves to pip Wicker Man into my 10/10 tier and overall top 10 for raw mentality and shock value and the slightly unrefined tracking and less-than-stellar trains shouldn’t be a barrier to that: After getting off Tonnerre 2 Zeus, I made my way onto another smaller coaster… Vol D’Icare Vol D’Icare was on the way to our final unexplored section and appeared quiet, so I decided to give it a solo ride. I pretty much walked straight onto it and was batched onto the back car. So, how was it? Well, while a relatively minor ride, I was interested to experience Vol D’Icare by virtue of it being the only remaining Zierer Comet coaster, with the other one being the late Hornet down at Flambard’s in Cornwall, whose most notable selling point was being “Britain’s most southerly roller coaster”. As these Zierers go, I thought it was good fun, if not earth-shattering; there were some fun drops and bits of mild speed, but some of the numerous brakes were also quite sharp as well. All in all, then, it was a perfectly serviceable filler coaster for a park like Parc Astérix, but I’m quite glad I never ventured 3.5 hours down to the bottom of Cornwall exclusively to ride this exact coaster at Flambard’s: After Vol D’Icare, we headed to our final coaster of the day… Pegase Express Pegase Express was on an advertised 20 minute queue time, so as it was our final unridden coaster of the day, we decided to give it a go. The 20 minute queue time ended up being somewhat understated, with us waiting 35 minutes, and while throughputs were generally quite good, the loading process seemed a bit chaotic on here, with sporadic batching and guests entering straight from the queue into the train without standing in the airgates. I don’t know quite what was going on here! So, how was the ride? Well, this was my first of these Gerstlauer family launch coasters, and I have to say that I thought it was really decent! The ride’s forward section was smooth, punchy and dynamic, the backwards section also packed a decent punch and was great fun, and the ride was generally excellent fun and a good length! Overall, I found it very enjoyable and on a similar level to rides like Thirteen at Alton Towers and Gold Rush at Drayton Manor; I really enjoyed it, and I definitely think this is my favourite Gerstlauer coaster: After Pegase Express, we were all pretty hot, so we decided to head to a water ride for some hydration… Romus et Rapidus Romus et Rapidus was on an advertised 20 minute queue time, so seeking a cool-off after lots of hot queueing, we decided to take a ride on there. The queue time was overstated, with us getting on within 10 minutes, and we were quickly batched with a friendly French couple who could tell we were English and made conversation with us. So, how was it? Well, I thought it was a great rapids, and my boat companions seemed to agree; there were some good waves and a good element of chance, there were some decent effects, and it was decently wet without being a Bilge-Rats or Valhalla-level saturation event, which is just what you want on a hot day like today! Overall, then, Romus et Rapidus was a fun diversion from the coastering, and the cooling off made us all slightly less fried from the heat: After Romus et Rapidus, my family were done with riding, so as there was just under an hour left of the day and I was quite adamant I didn’t want to leave the park having only ridden Toutatis once, I headed for a reride on Toutatis. I was unable to use single rider as it was closed, so I got in a 45 minute advertised main queue that ended up being 65. After this morning, I thought I needed a second ride to settle my true feelings on Toutatis… and the second ride settled it. While it’s incredibly close and a return to Florida could easily tip the scales in the opposite direction, I am currently saying that I prefer it to VelociCoaster and am therefore crowning a new #1 coaster. While there are aspects of VelociCoaster I prefer (the top hat being the main one, and I also don’t think Toutatis’ roll at the end quite matches the mosasaurus roll), the fact is that that swing launch sequence alone is unspeakably phenomenal like nothing else I’ve ever experienced and the overall layout of Toutatis is every bit as good and hard-hitting as that of VelociCoaster outside of that, and that does swing the balance in Toutatis’ favour for me. What a ride, and what a model; I was once ambivalent at best about Intamin as a manufacturer, but that’s a 2 for 2 hit rate on these new-generation Blitz Coasters for me now, and I’m can see the hype. They really are that good!: After my reride on Toutatis, I met back up with my family and we headed out of Parc Astérix after a great and successful first visit: So, that brings a close to my first ever visit to Parc Astérix in France! I had an excellent day; it was great to get on all the rides and see the park for the first time! It is an excellent park; there are some absolutely brilliant rides, the theming is overall very nice, and the operations are also very good overall, even if there are some slight quirks! I’m not currently sure quite where to rank it compared to other European parks I’ve visited, as I think it’s hard for me to gauge a full feel for it having only had 1 day there, compared to Europa and PA where I had 3 and properly had time to explore and relax. Rides-wise, the key highlight was obviously my new #1 coaster Toutatis; I was excited for it and it did not disappoint in the slightest! But there’s so much more to the park beyond that; Tonnerre 2 Zeus and Oz’Iris were both fantastic rides, Pegase Express was an excellent family coaster, Cetautomatix and Trace du Hourra were good fun, the rapids were great, and there’s more to mention and more I didn’t ride! It seems like a park where you could easily spend 2 days if you wanted to, and it’s a more substantial destination in its own right than I’d perhaps expected. Thanks for reading; I hope you’ve enjoyed this report! There will be another one later in the week from a day at Disneyland Paris, which will be my first visit in 15 years! I can’t wait to get back there, get back on some things and also get on lots of things I couldn’t or didn’t ride the first time!

12th May 2026: Thorpe Park My period between jobs is rolling on, so with me having secured a permanent role, I thought; why not use the Merlin pass once again and go for a midweek Thorpe Park visit? I know I was only in Thorpe a month or so ago, but I made the spur-of-the-moment trip decision after noticing the quiet crowds last week and I like Thorpe. Sue me! I left home at about 6:30 this morning, arriving at Bristol Parkway just after 7am to take a 7:29 train to Staines, with a change in Reading. As a fun aside, I noticed the head of my directorate from my previous job waiting on the platform, but based on his suit and tie, I’d hazard a guess that he wasn’t heading to Thorpe Park! I arrived in Staines within just under 2 hours, and with all running to time, an Uber to the park and a non-existent security queue got me through the gates at just before 9:45, putting me in good stead for my first ride at opening time: Upon getting in, I repeated my usual Thorpe Park strategy and started with… Colossus While it looks like everyone heads in this direction at park opening time on paper, they’re all heading to Hyperia in reality, so I still stand by Colossus as a strong starting point in the morning. Today, I walked onto row 2 of the very first train of the day; the strategy hasn’t failed me yet! So, how was Colossus? Well, it’s never an absolute favourite of mine due to those extremely uncomfortable trains, but I have to say that it was running quite well this morning; the first half was smooth and had great speed and forces, and even the second half, while not a favourite of mine, seemed more enjoyable than usual! All in all, then, I’m considering that a win as far as Colossus is concerned; it was running well, and it was a good way to start the day: After I got off Colossus, I pondered my usual strategy of heading for a single rider ride on Saw, but the ride was still closed, so I instead decided to head for… Hyperia Hyperia was on an advertised 20 minute queue, but as my last visit showed me that the single rider queue is often quiet first thing, I decided to take a gamble on using that. And this proved a prudent gamble, as I waited a mere 5 minutes to be batched onto row 3. I’ve never seen Hyperia’s single rider queue that quiet before! But how was it? Well, Hyperia has always been a favourite of mine, and today was no exception; the ride was stunning! I’m going to come out with a strong sentiment and say that with more rides, I increasingly think that first drop might possibly be my favourite in the world; it’s a complete riot wherever you sit, with phenomenal sustained ejector that flings you way out of your seat and holds you there and the twist adding a really interesting additional dimension of forces compared to a regular straight drop! As much as I’m an advocate of good, straight airtime on rides over being unconventional for the sake of it, I would also have to say that that outerbank is truly insane and probably the most convincing example of non-traditional weightlessness I’ve ridden! The junior Immelmann and stall are great too… and to be honest, all of it’s pretty phenomenal! The ride is also incredibly smooth, comfortable and rerideable (I swear it feels smoother than it did in 2024, if anything), and when combined with the awesome airtime and speed, that makes it a true winner in my book! All in all, then, I was thrilled to get back on Hyperia; it’s easily my favourite coaster in the UK, and right up there in my top 5 overall, which is no mean feat when I’ve done nearly 150 coasters: After I got off Hyperia, I decided to take advantage of the very short single rider queue and partake in not one, but two back-to-back rerides after that. I had a row 2 followed by a back row, and while both were sublime, I think getting on the back counteracted a comment I made in my last Thorpe trip report. Last time, I thought Hyperia might well be a coaster best ridden in the front half of the train after experiencing the front half for the first time… but having reridden the back, there’s no doubt in my mind that it’s a back row coaster for me, as much as it’s sublime in every row. The back row experience of that first drop alone settles it for me; as much as it hits hard in any row, the back is just narrowly where it hits hardest and it is my favourite element on the ride! After three back-to-back rides on Hyperia, I decided it was time to explore the rest of the park. Saw was still having some trouble opening, so I instead decided to head towards a B&M instead… Nemesis Inferno Nemesis Inferno was on an advertised 5 minute queue time and I hadn’t ridden it yet, so I decided to take advantage of this and give it a go. The queue time board was true to its word, and I was seated in row 4 within 5 minutes; it’s always good when that happens! So, how was it? Well, I’ve always liked Nemesis Inferno, and today was no exception! The ride was smooth with excellent forces and speed and some great inversions; what’s not to like? I also have some indecision in my mind about whether I rank it or Nemesis higher; as much as Inferno has the more conventional layout of the two, I quite like how it runs: After getting off Nemesis Inferno, I headed to a flat ride… Detonator Detonator was on an advertised 5 minute queue, so I decided to give it a go. The queue time board stayed true to its word, with me waiting only one cycle to board. So, how was it? Well, I do love a good drop tower, and Detonator is always an excellent one, with a wonderfully punchy drop! I always think these Fabbri models have more punch to them than you expect: After Detonator, I headed to a different coaster… Stealth Stealth was on an advertised 10 minute queue, so I decided to take a ride on there. The 10 minute queue was if anything slightly overstated, taking around 5 minutes, which is always great! So, how was the ride? Well, I do always love Stealth, and today was no exception; that hydraulic launch is so punchy, the airtime is great, and the speed is wonderful! I’ll admit that the more I ride it, the more I’m not a fan of the restraints on there; if it had the lap bars like Red Force, we’d be onto a winner. However, this is a minor niggle rather than a deal breaker; I still think it’s an absolutely awesome ride: After my first ride on Stealth, I had a reride while the queue was still short and I was still in the area. I was seated in the back once again, and it was once again awesome! After my reride on Stealth, I headed down towards another big coaster I hadn’t yet ridden during the day, but on the way over, I couldn’t resist another reride on Hyperia. Single rider delivered the goods in the form of a 5-10 minute wait once again, I was seated in row 6, and the ride was once again phenomenal! On a side note, I should add that unlike the typical trope of airtime trying to undress riders, Hyperia tried its very hardest to redress me each time I rode it; I was wearing a waterproof coat with the hood down, and without fail, the airtime in some of the elements made it fly up and stay over my head every time!: After Hyperia, I finally headed towards the coaster I was referring to before… Saw: The Ride Saw was on an advertised 30 minute queue, but as with Hyperia, I was able to exploit the secret weapon of the single rider queue to shorten this. Single rider delivered once again, with me only waiting 5-10 minutes for my ride on Saw; I can never moan about that! So, how was it? Well, Saw is never an absolute favourite of mine, but it wasn’t running too badly today. It was a bit rough in areas, but not too terrible. With time, one thing I have also grown to appreciate about Saw is the airtime; it’s not exactly known for airtime, but there are quite a few surprising pops of ejector throughout the ride, which I always like! The Euro-Fighter as a ride style is never the most comfortable and is rarely an absolute favourite of mine as a result, but with all things considered, Saw was running quite well today. It also provided me with a very fresh point of comparison for when I go and ride Drakon for the first time at the weekend: After Saw, I went to do another flat ride favourite of mine (and it’s rare that you hear me call a flat ride a “favourite”!)… Rush Rush was on an advertised 5 minute queue time. In actuality, this ended up being a walk-on for me, as I was batched into the next cycle that was about to be loaded; I can never moan about that! So, how was the ride? Well, despite not being a huge fan of flat rides on the whole, I’ve always liked Rush, and today was no exception! While somewhat repetitive as all flat rides are, I like the fact that it focuses on airtime and speed rather than spinning or repetitive forces, and I find the airtime at each peak and speed in each trough great fun! I do, however, bemoan the cycle on there; Rush runs quite a weak cycle, and only 1 or 2 full height swings were offered up today. As a point of comparison, I would say Rush in its current state feels markedly tamer than Serengeti Flyer at Busch Gardens Tampa, which ran a much longer cycle and had absolutely bags of sustained airtime and probably sits as my favourite non-drop tower flat ride as a result. Even still, I do always enjoy Rush, and I was glad to get on it: After Rush, I went to ride my final big coaster that I hadn’t yet ridden during the day… The Swarm The Swarm was on an advertised 5 minute queue time, so as I hadn’t yet ridden it today, I decided to take a ride on there. As promised, I only waited around 5 minutes before swiftly taking my seat in row 5. So, how was it? Well, I’ve always had a soft spot for Swarm, and while I’ve gone up and down on it over the years, it was running really well today! The first drop, with that awesome sensation of diving towards the ground, is truly ace, I love the floaty inversions, with the last roll being a particular highlight, and I also love the sheer sense of speed that the winged trains provide! It’s also a really smooth experience that is easy to reride and enjoy, and while the vest restraints aren’t my absolute favourite, they don’t lock and tighten as badly as they used to and the ride is more enjoyable for it. Overall, then, I had a fantastic ride on Swarm; I always enjoy it, and perhaps controversially, I increasingly think it might be my 2nd favourite coaster on park behind Hyperia again after a few years of having been lower down and behind Stealth: After getting off Swarm, the queue had shortened, so while I was in the area, I decided to partake in not one, but two back-to-back rerides. I had a back row and another row 5, and these were once again fantastic! After my rerides on Swarm, I headed for a reride on Detonator. Once again, it was an absolutely awesome drop tower with a surprising amount of kick for its size, and on this ride, they were interestingly running a slightly different audio track about it being “time to drop the gondola” that didn’t reference any of the firework theming that the regular one does: I then went for a reride on Nemesis Inferno. I was in row 6 this time, and it was once again great: I then went for another single rider queue reride on Hyperia. I was in row 7 this time, and it was once again sublime: I then sat down and ate my packed lunch before heading for not one, not two, but three brilliant back-to-back rerides on Stealth, in row 6, row 8 and row 9 respectively: I then went for another reride on Nemesis Inferno. I was on the back this time, and it was once again an awesome ride: After that, I went for another brilliant Detonator reride, where normal service seemed to have resumed from an audio perspective: I then went for three back-to-back rerides on The Swarm, in row 5, row 6 and row 5 respectively. Once again, these were excellent: After that, I went for another great walk-on ride on Rush; it was nice to spice the rerides up a little with a flat ride: After Rush, I went for another sublime Hyperia reride in row 7. I tried the main queue this time, as it had fallen to an advertised 10 minutes and single rider looked longer than earlier, but I’m not sure that single rider wouldn’t have been better, as it ultimately took 15. Even still, it moved quicker than single rider, still wasn’t particularly long, and wasn’t exactly impeding ride count given that this was the 27th ride of the day, so I can’t really complain: I then went for a reride on Nemesis Inferno. I was sat on the back this time, and it was awesome once again: After that, I was originally going to go for more rerides on Stealth and/or Swarm, but Stealth was closed and Hyperia remained short, so seeing as I was unlikely to ever see the Hyperia single rider queue so short again, I decided to take full advantage and park myself in Fearless Valley for the rest of the day (it was about 3:40pm by this point, and the park shut at 5pm). Unoriginal, I know, but Hyperia is easily my favourite ride on park and I’d had a perfectly good fill of the other coasters between this visit end my visit last month. Between 3:40 and park close, I managed 7 back-to-back rerides on Hyperia using the single rider queue, in a variety of different rows. I was unfortunately sat on the left hand side for a number of them, where the host seemed intent on stapling me to death each time, but on my final row 6 ride, I was sat on the right hand side, where I had possibly my loosest lap bar ever on Hyperia and flew miles out of the seat like never before on that first drop! On the plus side, the stapled rides did show me that Hyperia most certainly passes the stapling test in that it still hits hard with airtime even when you’re stapled in. That is not necessarily a given on an airtime machine! This sequence of rerides was a lovely way to finish off the day, and after a number of visits where I’ve only managed 2 rides on it, I was very pleased to close out the day with 13 Hyperia rides in total: After that, park close had arrived, so I headed out of the park and made my way back home, arriving back into Bristol Parkway at around 8pm. So, that wraps up my day at Thorpe Park! I had an absolutely amazing day; the park was nice and quiet, which meant that getting lots of rides in was easy! If you lost count, I managed 35 rides in total, which is the most I’ve ever managed at Thorpe Park (or any Merlin park, for that matter) and second only to 51 rides during last June’s deserted Paultons Park day overall. I can’t moan about that! My final ride tallies were: 13x Hyperia 6x The Swarm 5x Stealth 4x Nemesis Inferno 3x Detonator 2x Rush 1x Saw: The Ride 1x Colossus This day underscored to me how much I love Thorpe Park on days like this. On a day where I’m alone with short queues, there are very few parks I would pick to be in over Thorpe. The ride lineup is a wonderful one to reride, as you have lots of great choices! My definite highlight is Hyperia, but the likes of Swarm, Stealth and Inferno are also there to provide additional variety! Thanks for reading; I hope you’ve enjoyed this report! My next one will actually be arriving very soon, as I’m unexpectedly going to be attending the opening day of Valgard at Paultons Park on Saturday! It will be interesting to attend an opening day, if nothing else, and I can’t wait to see what the new land has to offer!

Prelude After a successful solo trip to Adventure Island and Thorpe Park the other week, I decided to make the most of my time off work before starting my new job and go on another trip away. And given that I only had one real semi-major park left to visit in the UK, I thought; what better park to do than that? So as a result, I strategised quite a spur-of-the-moment trip to the Midlands, consisting of both a first time visit to Fantasy Island in Lincolnshire after talking about going for a couple of years and a Merlin pass visit to Alton Towers (I know I was only last in Alton Towers 4 weeks ago, but the entry is free, I want to make use of my Merlin pass, it’s close to my choice of halfway point and I like Towers. Sue me!). In order to break up the ridiculously long rail journey to Skegness from my location (5+ hours), I decided to stay in Nottingham for 2 nights and travel up yesterday. I don’t have a huge amount to say about yesterday, but as a first-time visitor to Nottingham (and aside from a stop in Trowell services along the M1, the East Midlands full stop!), I did amble quite steadily to my hotel and try and take in my surroundings, and I did see these cool Robin Hood statues by the castle: I also came within touching distance of David off the recent series of Celebrity Traitors in Nottingham station on my way up, which I’m putting down as my most noteworthy celebrity sighting! Other than that, I can’t think of much else to mention. Nottingham is a lot like any other town centre in Britain, with some nice old buildings, but my hotel is in the student district near Nottingham Trent University and that has seen me be immersed in amongst some… interesting crowds at times. Anyway, let’s get onto the meat of the first park day… 23rd April 2026: Fantasy Island My Fantasy Island day started early. I got up at 6am, rope dropped breakfast in the hotel at 6:30am (I’m not sure that expression works quite as well outside of a theme park context…) and made my way to the station at just after 7am in time for a 7:41 train to Skegness. This train took a bit over 2 hours and was very prompt, although I have to say that the line between Grantham and Skegness has some of the bounciest sections of railway line I’ve ever ridden… after getting off the train, I got onto a very opportunely timed bus to Ingoldmells, passing key sights of the area like Botton’s Pleasure Beach (unfortunately closed, or else I might have considered grabbing the creds!) and Butlin’s. This got me to the park with plenty of time to spare: Upon reaching Fantasy Island, it wasn’t even 10:30am and the rides opened at 11am, so I had some time to kill. Seeing as I wasn’t entirely sure where I was going either, I decided to have a wander around and take a few pictures: Now this is where I was getting my first feel for Fantasy Island as a park, and at this point, I feel I should insert in some stray observations. Firstly, I have to say that it’s possibly one of the strangest parks I’ve ever visited. It’s a park of quite distinct halves, more so than perhaps any other I’ve been to; the indoor section is surprisingly heavily themed and atmospheric, whereas the outdoor section has a very permanent funfair-type atmosphere with little to no theming or atmosphere building. Possibly the oddest thing I noticed was the 7-day market; the park has a huge market at its heart with a very eclectic variety of stalls, to say the least. I didn’t browse the market too heavily (or at all, for that matter), but I saw clothes, homeware, garden apparel, towels, weaponry, off-brand merchandise for different brands, and even places where you seemingly could get body modifications including botox (?!). It almost reminded me of going to America for the first time and seeing that you could buy firearms in the same aisle as a roast chicken in Walmart; the range of items is very wide, very odd, and not what I would immediately associate with a theme park. It’s not really my cup of tea, but if you want to ride roller coasters and shop for a wide variety of oddities in the same day, Fantasy Island is the place for you! Anyhow, let me get to the rides. The rides were running in rotation today (hence my not immediately intuitive order of doing them), so I decided to start my day with the key coaster draw that was open for the first 2.5 hours of the day… Millennium Millennium was the thrill coaster open for the first period of the day, so I decided to start there. I was the first person in the queue, so resultantly, I was in the front row of the first train of the day at 11am. It’s great when that happens! So, how was it? Well, I’d always heard of Millennium being referred to as “the smoothest old Vekoma around”, and it was indeed very smooth… but on my first ride, I wasn’t immediately wowed as it seemed like there were large swathes that just… didn’t do a whole lot. Some of the inversions were fun, but on my first ride, there wasn’t a whole lot of kick and it just seemed to trundle around a lot. However, this first ride was also very cold, which was definitely a distractor when I wasn’t yet into the swing of riding for the day, and I didn’t quite have a full feel for the ride yet, so I decided not to make a snap judgement call there. All in all, my initial ride on Millennium was good fun, but not something that immediately wowed me. There is more to come from Millennium later in the day, however: After Millennium, I decided to stay in the pyramid and go for a dark ride… Harrington Flint’s Island Adventures Harrington Flint was nearby, open and walk-on, so I decided to take a ride on there. I was aware that Harrington Flint is a fairly unique dark ride, being the UK’s only use of trackless technology, and also a relatively recent addition, so I was intrigued to see what it was like. So, how was it? Well, I have to say that it was quite a fun little ride! It’s predominantly screen-based, but the screen quality is quite good, and there are some nice bits of physical theming too. I also got 61,000, which as someone who’s rubbish at interactive dark rides, I’m not going to complain about! All in all, then, I enjoyed Harrington Flint; I thought it was a surprisingly well-done ride for a park of this calibre, and I definitely thought it had nice theming and was good fun: After Harrington Flint, I headed back outside to try a flat ride I was wanting to get on… Volcano Volcano was open and walk-on, so I decided to have a ride on there. While I have ridden S&S shot towers plenty of times before, I always enjoy a tower ride, so I was keen to get on Volcano at least once today. As I just mentioned, I walked straight onto the ride, and as I was the only person approaching, I got a completely solo ride, which is always interesting! But how was the ride? Well, I always like a tower ride, and this was quite a good one; the upwards launch was punchy, and there was a very nice pop of air at the top! As S&S shot towers go, I’d say Volcano is one of the better ones I’ve done; I’d certainly take it comfortably over my last memory of Ice Blast (pre-revamp) at Blackpool, for example. I do think my preference overall errs towards a regular drop tower like Detonator over a shot tower, but the shot towers are still great fun and I still thoroughly enjoyed Volcano; at this point of the day, it was perhaps my favourite attraction: After Volcano, I headed for another coaster… Rhombus Express Rhombus Express was once again walk-on (you’re going to get bored of me saying this…), so I decided to take a ride on there. I waltzed straight onto the back row; if Runaway Mine Train at Alton is anything to go by, back is always my seat of choice on a powered coaster! So, how was the ride? Well, I find family powered coasters can be a bit hit and miss, with some like Runaway Mine Train at Alton Towers falling into “surprisingly fun underdog” territory and others like Jormungandr at Drayton Manor being much of a muchness. To my delight, Rhombus Express falls into the former category; this thing absolutely flies! Powered coasters never have overly intense layouts, but this one is taken at some speed and has some great helixes that pack surprising punch; there’s one towards the end in particular that has some really surprising kick! All in all, then, I thought Rhombus Express was an excellent powered coaster that took me by surprise; it falls squarely into that Runaway Mine Train bracket of packing surprising thrills for a family coaster, and as the traditional powered coasters go, it’s right up there with RMT and Europa Park’s previous Alpenexpress as one of the best for me: After Rhombus Express, I headed over to the other side of the park to get another new coaster in… Apple Coaster As many of you will know, I don’t typically do kiddie coasters (although I’m honestly starting to question whether I can say that anymore…), but as Apple Coaster was walk-on and had no one in the vicinity, I decided to give this particular kiddie cred a try. In this particular case, I was actually the only one on the train, so I was batched right at the front on the caterpillar’s face! In terms of the ride itself, there’s not really an awful lot to say; it’s a big apple, and these coasters are what they are: After Apple Coaster, I headed for another ride on Millennium. I was seated in row 4 this time, and for some reason, it definitely clicked much more than the first time! The ride overall seemed more potent and thrilling, and I felt like even some of the gentler sections were more fun and had slightly more purpose. While the layout is quite odd and does have its dead spots, I quite like how the ride almost feels a bit like an adventure around the park; it’s quite good fun to ride! It’s maybe more than the sum of its parts in this sense, and towards the end of the layout, the ride does try to inject a little more spice into the scenic sections: After my reride on Millennium, I had a reride on Volcano, which was my longest queue of the day at the heady heights of 10-15 minutes (only 2 cycles, though). Once again, the ride was great fun, with a punchy launch and some great airtime at the top: After my reride on Volcano, I headed for a reride on Rhombus Express. I only waited one cycle, I sat on the back once again, and the ride was once again a surprisingly good powered coaster; I do have a soft spot for a powered coaster that has a surprising kick: After my reride on Rhombus Express, I sat down in the pyramid and had lunch. I was frugal on this occasion and had purchased a Co-op meal deal in Nottingham station, but I did get the added bonus of seeing a surprisingly elaborate-looking projection mapping show, complete with lighting, voiceover and fake snow, while I was sat in the pyramid. This was a nice touch and fun to watch, but perfectly sums up my point from earlier about the park being one of two halves, I feel; you almost wouldn’t think the pyramid and the outdoor area were in the same park. After lunch, I went for not one, but two back-to-back rerides on Millennium. One was in row 3 and one was in the back, and once again, these were good fun; the ride definitely grew on me after my initial ride in the morning: I then went for another reride on Rhombus Express. The host had changed and I was made to sit in row 2 this time, but I still only waited one cycle and the ride was still really good fun; even in the front, it packed a punch: After my reride on Rhombus Express, I went for one final reride on Millennium. I walked onto row 3, and the ride was once again really good fun; despite my cold demeanour towards it in the morning, it had definitely risen in my estimations with additional rides to fall solidly into “good little ride, that” territory by the time it shut for the day. It’s not quite overall top quartile or UK top 10 material for me, but it’s a good, fun ride for sure and probably my favourite coaster across any of the 4 East Coast parks I’ve been to (Fantasy Island, Adventure Island, Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach and Pleasurewood Hills): After my final reride on Millennium, the next ride rotation was about to open (the open rides, aside from a select few that stayed open all day, changed at 1:30pm), so I decided to pre-emptively get into the queue for my other main draw to Fantasy Island… Odyssey It was approaching 1:30pm, so I decided to head over to Odyssey and pre-emptively wait for it to open. The changeover maybe wasn’t completely seamless, so the ride ended up opening at more like 1:45pm after some minutes of waiting for the staff to arrive and pre-testing. Even still, I was one of the first on the first train of the day, so I walked straight into row 2; I can never quibble with that, even if I might have liked the front for my first go! So, how did I find Odyssey? Well, despite it being an SLC, Odyssey seems to get a fair amount of praise, so with Kumali also being pretty enjoyable and proving to me that SLCs are not a complete lost cause as a ride type if they aren’t the standard layout, I entered Odyssey with some cautious optimism. As much as I Ioathe Infusion, I do love a big, fast coaster, so I thought; surely Odyssey’s sheer height and speed will make it a fairly decent ride, even if not top end material? Alas, these hopes were dashed upon hitting the bottom of the first drop, where I quickly realised that a big, fast SLC is sadly still an SLC. The rush down towards the ground is pretty impressive, but as soon as you pull any kind of force, the train just bashes you around horribly; it bounced up and down aggressively to such an extent that it made my stomach hurt while also relentlessly bashing your head between the restraints. The first couple of elements are undeniably impressive in scale, but are so rough that they’re difficult to enjoy, and after that, it just seems to devolve into doing very little aside from being utterly brutal and beating you up high above the ground. I dearly wanted Odyssey to be an underdog like Kumali, but for me, I’m afraid the ride just wasn’t enjoyable at all, I definitely found it overhyped, and I’d go as far as to say that after my first ride, I perhaps controversially rated it right down there with Infusion (I’m genuinely not sure whether I actually preferred it to my last go on Infusion, in fact) and was stunned that a coaster of such scale could be so awful to ride. I felt I should give it another go later to be fair, however: After my first ride on Odyssey, I headed to go and grab my final credit of the day… Snow Drift Snow Drift had just opened and was the last coaster I needed and was able to ride at Fantasy Island (being well over 1.6m tall, I didn’t even attempt Jellikins), so I headed to take a ride on it. I only waited one car or so for my ride; I can never complain about that! So, how was it? Well, I discovered that despite this apparently being a Mellors-built coaster, it is basically a clone of the Reverchon spinning wild mice that I know and hate, and resultantly, it just wasn’t a ride experience I enjoyed. I just don’t like the strong laterals on these wild mouse coasters, and while this one wasn’t an outstandingly bad example of the ride type, none of them are coasters I rate simply due to the intrinsic nature of them not being something I overly enjoy: After Snow Drift, I went for a reride on Odyssey, hoping for it to redeem itself and for us to have a repeat of the Millennium saga from earlier in the day. Alas, I was in row 2 again, and such hopes were quickly dashed; it was just as awful as it was the first time: Feeling slightly delicate after a rough ride on Odyssey, I then decided to go into the pyramid to find something else to do. I resultantly went on a bit of a journey of discovery doing a few random attractions, starting with… Toucan Tours I had no idea what Toucan Tours was, but the entrance made it sound intriguing, so I decided to give it a go. I waited around 5 minutes for this, with 1 or 2 cars of people in front of me, so it was another short wait that I couldn’t complain about. So, how was it? And what was it, for that matter? Well, it turned out that Toucan Tours was a sweet little monorail attraction that started with some nice panoramic views of the pyramid area before going into a few dark ride scenes. The dark ride scenes were relatively static, for the most part, but I found the whole thing quite endearing! It was a very nice little attraction, with some nice physical theming and set pieces, and I would say it was a real hidden gem: After getting off Toucan Tours, I continued my journey of discovery in the pyramid with a ride on… Seaquarium Seaquarium was nearby and I’d seen the entrance while on Toucan Tours, so as it was also an attraction I’d had recommended to me, I decided to take a ride on there. Again, it was walk-on, which is a bonus, and again, I wasn’t entirely sure what to expect; I had an inkling it was a dark ride, but other than that, I wasn’t really sure. So, how was it? Well, like Toucan Tours above, I have to say that I found Seaquarium to be an absolute hidden gem of an attraction; what a lovely little dark ride! There was lots of moving scenery, there was lots to look at, and all in all, I just found the whole thing very sweet! It was certainly an enjoyable dark ride, and I’m very glad I stumbled across it: After getting off Seaquarium, I decided to have a go on the attraction whose entrance was next to it… The Guardian The Guardian’s entrance was next door to Seaquarium, so in the spirit of continuing my journey of discovery in the pyramid, I decided to have a go on there. I remember it being built, but I’ll admit I had very little idea of what was actually in here once again. To add to the anticipation, I spent a few minutes wondering if it was actually open, as I stood alone on some stairs in front of a random door for a good few minutes… it felt very weird being the only one stood in front of this door while looking over children doing the Macarena on the stage below (incidentally, this gave me flashbacks to our hotel in PortAventura, where the Macarena was the subject of the children’s entertainment and we could quietly overhear it every night while having a drink)! The 1.4m height restriction and enclosed nature certainly sent my mind racing, and I initially had inklings in my head of a Top Scan, for some reason (?), but then I did remember something about a robotic arm, so was not too surprised when the ride turned out to be a robotic arm. What I didn’t expect, however, was the inclusion of a curved screen telling a story, thus making the composite ride experience something akin to a pound shop flying theatre. And you know what, it actually works surprisingly well! When combining the robotic arm movements with the story on screen, it did make for a nice little themed experience! I also didn’t find the robotic arm movements too intense; I sometimes found that Forbidden Journey at Universal, which uses similar robotic arm technology, made me a little bit motion sick, but this didn’t seem as bad, bizarrely. All in all, then, I thought The Guardian was a very simple, but effective themed attraction, and yet again, I’d say it falls very nicely into the bracket of “hidden gem”: After getting off The Guardian, I went back outside and perhaps against my better judgement, I decided to give Odyssey one final chance. I was seated on the front this time, so I wondered if it might be better, but while the sense of speed was heightened somewhat, the ride was sadly every bit as bad as before if not worse. With my stomach really hurting and my ears throbbing after a particularly hard whack during that last ride (that my right ear still feels slightly bruised from now), I decided at that point that I’d given Odyssey enough chances and was unlikely to ever rate it. With it being the park’s arguable crown jewel and such a big, fast ride, I really, really wanted to like it, but I sadly just didn’t at all. I’m sorry to say it, but when I think of the actual ride experience, I don’t think I’ve ever ridden a coaster that huge with so few redeeming qualities. As much as the size is impressive and it’s undeniably unique, the ride experience is no better than regular old Infusion for me, which means it’s really not something I rate at all: After my reride on Odyssey, I headed over to Rhombus Express for another reride. I was sat in row 14 this time, and it was once again a really good, fun powered coaster; it flies around the layout and really does pack a punch in places: After my Rhombus Express reride, I decided to head for a flat ride… Star Flyer It dawned on me that as ubiquitous as they are, I’d never actually ridden a Star Flyer before, so as Fantasy Island had one that was walk-on, I decided to give it a go. So, how was my first experience of a Star Flyer? Well, it was certainly an interesting ride experience! As much as I’m not generally a huge lover of flats, the spinning wasn’t too intense on this, and it was quite exhilarating flying high above the ground and having the wind rush into your face: After Star Flyer, I had a final reride on Rhombus Express. I was sat in the back once again, and it was once again really good fun: After that Rhombus Express reride, I closed out my day with a final new flat ride… Techno Jump Techno Jump was walk-on, so as it was a style of flat ride I’d never done before, I decided to take a ride on there. During the era of the Retrosquad at Alton Towers, people used to rave about Mixtape, so I was intrigued to see how one of these Smashing Jumps rode. But how was it? Well, I initially thought it was quite good fun; the jumping produced some fun weightless g-forces, and the spinning wasn’t too intense! However, they ran it for a very long cycle that seemed to get progressively more intense, and I’ll admit this perhaps made it surpass my (relatively low) flat ride tolerance. Had it been a shorter cycle, I would have thought it an enjoyable ride, but the length of cycle made it a little bit much for me in this case. On a side note, a guest remark I heard on this ride really did exemplify the odd hybrid environment that Fantasy Island has cultivated. I overheard someone ask the ride operator “do you need an ID to get a tattoo in that shop over there?”, and it made me think that Fantasy Island must be one of very few places around where you can get a tattoo and ride a roller coaster in the same trip… I find it all quite peculiar, personally, but each to their own: After getting off Techno Jump, ride close was fast approaching, so content with my day, I decided to aim for an earlier train to Nottingham and catch an Uber out of Ingoldmells to get back to Skegness and catch the train to Nottingham: So, that brings a close to my first day at Fantasy Island in Lincolnshire! I had a really good day; I got on 23 rides in total, which is not to be sniffed at in the space of under 5 hours, and I was glad to get the +5, get on Millennium and Odyssey for the first time, and see my final semi-major UK park! It does feel pretty good to have completed the semi-major UK parks and seen everything that’s a major draw coasters-wise; now that my most notable unridden UK coaster has gone drastically down in magnitude to some Pinfari somewhere, I can live with that! As for Fantasy Island itself; as I inferred further up, I found it an odd park. As I’ve reiterated multiple times, it’s a park of two such distinct halves that they almost don’t feel like the same park. The pyramid area is absolutely lovely, with nice theming, some real hidden gem dark rides and a general high-quality atmosphere, while the outdoor area, with a few exceptions, mostly feels like a permanent funfair with all the atmosphere of an out-of-town industrial estate. And the market is really quite an odd extra dimension… I’ve never been anywhere quite like Fantasy Island! Attractions-wise, there’s actually a surprising amount to like; as much as Odyssey was a big disappointment for me, Millennium was really good fun, Volcano was good, Rhombus Rocket was surprisingly good, the dark rides in the pyramid were good… there’s definitely a fair amount there! Considering the distance I live from it, I’m not sure I’d specifically make the effort to return unless they built something major that warranted it, but I’d go back if I was in the area for other purposes. I’m definitely glad I went, though, and I had a good day overall! Thanks for reading; I hope you’ve enjoyed this report! Keep your eyes peeled for a trip report from Alton Towers tomorrow!

20th September 2025: Thorpe Park Hi guys. Today, I took my first visit to Thorpe Park of the season. While there hasn’t been anything new at Thorpe since my last visit, I was still keen to get back and experience some of my favourites again! I was particularly excited to get back on Hyperia given that I’d only ridden it on one visit last year and it definitely made its mark on me, making its way into my top 10 and christening itself my favourite UK coaster! Also, I was frankly keen to get back to a park after the end of my Master’s degree and the start of my job; I wanted to have something to look forward to after an intense summer, and what better than a trip to Thorpe Park? The day started early, with me leaving home at 6:30am this morning to make my way across the Severn Bridge to Bristol Parkway to catch a 7:21am train to Reading. I then changed in Reading to catch a train towards Staines. All in, this took around 2 hours, and it was mostly a very smooth journey. Incidentally, I’m always surprised at how quiet South Western Railway trains are, and how well stocked they are in terms of carriages. We had 8 carriages going from Reading to Staines; on Transport for Wales, CrossCountry or GWR back home, anything more than 2 feels relatively exuberant! I then decided to use my good friend Uber to get between station and park, which once again worked really well; after having a very friendly chap who asked me lots of theme park questions drive me to the park, I arrived at around 9:45am: After getting to the park, I initially had to wait around 30 minutes in a queue for security before entering; that’s the longest I’ve waited there in a while. After getting through this, though, I got in at around 10:15am: Due to my long security queue, my usual strategy of heading towards Saw and Colossus and knocking those out with minimal queues was stymied, as they already had queues approaching an hour. Resultantly, I decided to head towards a different area of the park and ride… Nemesis Inferno Nemesis Inferno was on an advertised 5 minute queue, so I decided to head over there. As I was approaching, the queue time increased to 15 minutes, but I didn’t think it looked like only 15 minutes, and a little bit after I joined, an announcement came over the tannoy stating it to be 45 minutes. As it turned out, though, the queue took only 25 minutes in reality due to good operations with minimal stacking; it’s always great when expectations are exceeded! So, how was the ride? Well, I was seated in row 5, and it was really good! I’ve always liked Inferno, and today was no exception! The ride was smooth, it had good forces, it had good speed; what’s not to like? I’ll admit, though, that I don’t think the ride did it for me quite like Nemesis Reborn up at Alton Towers did back in July; the original definitely has something special about it that Inferno, while a perfectly decent ride in its own right, doesn’t quite match: After I got off Nemesis Inferno, I headed to a nearby flat ride… Detonator Detonator was on an advertised 10 minute queue, so as I do love a good drop tower and I hadn’t done Detonator since 2023 (I think?), I was keen to give it a ride. The queue took slightly longer than advertised, taking around 15 minutes, but it was still short, so I can’t complain too much. So, how was the ride? Well, I am a fan of a good drop tower, and Detonator is a really good one! I’ve always loved how deceptively forceful the Fabbri towers are for their relatively diminutive stature, and if anything, Detonator was more forceful than I’d remembered. I was launched all the way out of my seat and stayed there for the whole journey down, and it was awesome! It was also my first time back on there following the Big Easy Boulevard retheme, and I have to say that I really like the changes; they add a really fun new element to the ride: After I got off Detonator, I headed for another coaster… Stealth Stealth was on an advertised 40 minute queue time, so as it was one of the shorter queues at this point, I was nearby and I hadn’t ridden it yet, I decided to take a spin on there. I had a very pleasant surprise in the form of the queue on here. While advertised 40, I only waited 15 minutes, likely in no small part due to some of the best operations I’ve ever seen on Stealth. The staff were absolutely throwing the trains out; pretty consistent 70-75 second dispatch intervals were being attained on there, my logged throughput average was almost 1,000pph, and the staff were very frequently outpacing the 40s dispatch timer on the platform (something I’d thought to be largely redundant in years gone by). Great job! But enough about ops; how was the ride? Well, I was seated in row 8, and it was absolutely fantastic; as per usual, the launch was fantastically punchy, the speed was phenomenal, and the airtime over the top hat in the back was on point! I do absolutely love Stealth; it’s easily my second favourite at Thorpe and among my UK top 5, and despite it being much shorter and slower than Red Force, I actually think I prefer it to Red Force. That hydraulic launch packs an unrivalled punch, and it’ll be a sad day when these hydraulic launchers go extinct: After I got off Stealth, the state of the queues elsewhere, and the comparatively short queue and high enjoyment I got from my Stealth ride, meant that I decided to go straight back round for another Stealth lap. I was seated in row 8 this time after a 25-30 minute wait, and the ride was once again fantastic! After my Stealth reride, I decided to head over to another coaster I hadn’t done yet… Saw The Ride Saw was on an advertised 65 minute queue time, but I decided to give it a ride because I was able to exploit a secret weapon… the single rider queue! I must admit it wasn’t quite such a secret weapon today, with it still taking 45 minutes, but even still, it was 20 minutes less than the advertised wait, so I can’t moan too much. So, how was the ride? Well, I got batched onto the back on an outer seat, and as much as I’m not the biggest Saw fan, I have to admit that it wasn’t running too badly today; it was rough in places, but not nearly as bad as it can be. There was also some good airtime on there, to be fair; I think Saw has some surprisingly good bits of air in places! On a side note, Saw seemed to attract some of the more memorable guest interactions today. In the station, two separate people were getting irate with the staff about their child being too short and were requesting multiple repeat measurements, one family tried to force a young girl on to the ride who was in absolute floods of tears and clearly didn’t want to ride, resulting in an argument (I was supposed to sit next to them, but they didn’t end up boarding with me due to said argument taking up too much time), and to cap things off, I was seated next to a teenage boy who kept yelling “F***ing hell, my balls!” throughout the ride: After I got off Saw, I examined the queues and decided to go for another Stealth reride, as it was on one of the shortest advertised queues at 20 minutes. The queue took 20-25 minutes, I was seated in row 9, and the ride was once again fantastic: After that Stealth reride, it began to rain, so I decided to take cover and buy a Burger King lunch. After this, my original plan had been to head to Swarm, but after seeing a certain golden goddess testing, my plans swiftly changed… Now, you might have noticed that despite me saying it was one of my most anticipated attractions of the day, Hyperia has been conspicuously absent from the report up to this point. The reason for this is because the ride had a “delayed opening” and did not open at all in the morning. However, when I left Burger King near Stealth, it was a little before 2pm, and high wind gusts were forecast to come in from 3:30pm or so. So with Hyperia having not opened at all and having suddenly started testing, and with its dislike of wind being well catalogued at this point, I decided I was taking no chances and headed straight over there to wait for it to open. I watched it test for around 10-15 minutes prior to it opening (seeing the unscrewed water dummies spill everywhere was interesting!), and the ride eventually opened at around 2:10pm. After it opened, I joined hordes of people in making a steady beeline into the queue… Hyperia As the ride opened and people gradually filed into the queue, the advertised queue time for Hyperia increased gradually, starting at 70 minutes, then increasing to 90, and eventually hitting 110 before I passed the threshold of the entrance. The queue time eventually hit 2.5 hours! I used the single rider queue, and midway through my wait, the ride actually went down for 10-15 minutes due to high winds. The gusts were registering as 26mph on my Apple Weather app, and were only set to increase… but after a few agonisingly slow test trains, the ride did thankfully reopen, and I waited 80 minutes for my ride on Hyperia from when it opened (probably more like 90-95 including the time I watched it test for), which I honestly don’t think is too bad given the circumstances. With me being initially spited out of the ride in June 2024, and with it delaying in opening and shutting for wind in September 2025, Hyperia really has done everything in its power to make me want to hate it over the years! But that’s enough about queues and wind delays; how was the ride? Well, despite the aforementioned, I’m happy to report that Hyperia was absolutely sublime, and it was possibly even better than I’d remembered from 2024! I was seated in row 8, and everything about it was absolutely cooking! There is so much to talk about with this ride; that first drop remains a highlight, with the mix of sustained ejector the whole way down and the lateral twist making for something quite unforgettable, but so many other aspects of it stand out! The general negative g-forces throughout are sublime, the speed is sublime, and unique elements like the outer banked turn and the stall dive loop also provide phenomenal hangtime and wonderfully weird sensations! And in general, the speed and execution of the entire thing is just delectable, and as well as that, it’s also so smooth and comfortable! I think it’s been a phenomenal addition to Thorpe Park and the UK industry; it’s certainly my favourite in the country by some distance, and to be honest, I’m pondering whether it should be an overall top 5 contender for me: After my ride on Hyperia, I resumed my original plan by heading over to… The Swarm The Swarm was on an advertised 55 minute queue, so as I’ve always liked Swarm and I hadn’t ridden it yet today, I decided to give it a go. Similarly to Stealth earlier, the queue was quite vastly shorter than advertised, with it only taking around 30 minutes. Once again, I think brilliant operations played a part in this; the staff were attaining over 1,000pph on here, and consistently attaining little to no stacking! But how was the ride? Well, I’ve always liked Swarm, but I have to admit that it was particularly potent for me today; I was sat in row 6, and I had an absolutely fantastic ride! Prior to Mako in 2016, Swarm spent 2 years as my number 1 coaster, and while it’s not nearly that high for me now, today’s ride made me remember why I always used to admire it so much; the sense of speed on there is brilliant, there are some great forces, there are some wonderfully floaty inversions, and overall, there’s a lot to love about it! On the plus side, the restraints were also nowhere near as bothersome as they have been in terms of tightening; have they adjusted these? Overall, The Swarm certainly went back up a little in my estimations after today’s ride; it was absolutely awesome!: After The Swarm, I’ll admit I got a little indecisive about what to do next. I briefly mulled over a reride on Detonator, and I also briefly mulled over a reride on Nemesis Inferno… but with how much I enjoyed it earlier, I made a spur-of-the-moment choice to reride Hyperia using the single rider queue. The queue was advertised at 110 minutes, and using the single rider queue, I got on in 75. Interestingly, Apple Weather said that wind gusts were now 36mph, 10mph faster than what it said when Hyperia was closed for wind earlier… yet Hyperia operated for the entire time I was in the queue, with only occasional vague threats of “we may potentially have to cease operation”. If nothing else, I think this speaks to the poor accuracy of Apple Weather! As for the ride itself, I was seated in row 5, and while I was concerned that the ride might be less potent in a middle seat, it hit every bit as hard as the previous ride, and if anything, some elements like the outerbank and the stall possibly felt more powerful further towards the front! I have to say that Hyperia today made me laugh and feel things like no coaster has in a while; in my slightly lighter year of only doing UK parks in 2025, it’s by far and away my favourite thing I’ve ridden this year, and my two rides on it have been my two favourite coaster rides of 2025 for sure: After I got off Hyperia, 6pm had arrived and it was time to leave the park and head back to the station, so I bade Thorpe Park goodbye before heading out to catch an Uber back to Staines station: Upon getting back to Staines station, I waited for my train to Reading, and I saw a rather cool Pullman vintage steam train pass through while I was there (apologies for the rubbish picture; I couldn’t take a picture of the front steam train car quickly enough…)! I unfortunately ended up being stranded in Reading for a solid hour due to my train back to Bristol being delayed by half an hour, which put a dampener on the end of the day; I ultimately arrived back in Bristol Parkway at just after 9:30pm and arrived back home at just after 10pm: So, that brings my day at Thorpe Park to an end! I’d be lying if I said it was my most fruitful day at the park in terms of ride count, with me only managing 9 rides, but even still, I had a good day and it was nice to get back to Thorpe! I particularly enjoyed getting back on Hyperia; it really is an absolutely sublime ride, and I dare say I liked it even more than I did in 2024! But as well as that, I also enjoyed getting back on some other Thorpe favourites like Stealth, Inferno and Swarm, and I just generally enjoyed getting back to the park for my first time of 2025! I rarely have a bad day at Thorpe Park, and there’s just something about the place that I really like! Thanks for reading; I hope you’ve enjoyed this report! This trip to Thorpe Park brings my 2025 season to an end. It’s definitely been a lighter year for me compared to the last couple, particularly in terms of new things (I guess that’s what happens when you choose to do a Master’s degree and have to do a dissertation over the summer), but I’ve still had some really enjoyable visits, and I have been pleased with my efficiency of coaster riding this year (despite only having 5 theme park visits this year, I’ve managed my second highest number of coaster rides in a year ever, being only 9 rides lower than last year!). I don’t know when my next park trip will be or where it will be to, but I’ll definitely report on it either way; I hope to hit the hobby a bit harder again in 2026, with some foreign travel potentially on the table!