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Mark9

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  1. Mark9

    Glitz and Glamour

    By Mark9,

    Yes I know what you're thinking, another Europa Park/Disneyland Paris trip report from Mark9. I was blown away by Europa Park in 2010 and 2013 and surely this trip can't be any different. And how could I possibly compete with the three blog wonder of Matt Creek's comprehensive Disneyland trip reports. Well... this is a report with a little bit of difference (Or at least I hope so, this is all on the fly so might just end up me complimenting every aspect of Europa Park). Nonetheless, I hope this entertains or at the least interests you.
    Scene 1 - Staying on site at Europa
    I make it a point to stay on site at Europa. Unlike other parks where it isn't essential, I feel staying on site gives such an advantage because of the sheer beauty and theme of the hotels. I've previously stayed in the Tipidorf, Hotel Colosseo and Bell Rock, and this time around was Hotel Alcatraz. Themed around a Spanish castle, this 9 floor building is the closest to the theme park.

    During check in I was hoping, praying for a view of the park. My wishes came true with an 8th floor view over the entire park. This blows away my previous favourite view of Shambhala and Dragon Khan at PortAventura.


    Hotel Alcatraz itself isn't the best of the hotels at Europa but it is certainly the most intimate, As an alcoholic I particularly enjoyed the 40th anniversary special cocktails in the bar on the 9th floor which afforded spectacular views of Wodan and the hotel area. I had a Blauer Enzian (The Mack name for their powered coasters) and a 40th Euromaus special. They were delicious.

    Staying at Europa Park is a fantastic experience and well recommended. The staff are friendly, accommodating and the attention to detail in the rooms is second to none. Next time, I'll be staying in Hotel Isabel but for first timers, Colosseo is the one I'd recommend.
    Scene 2 - 40 Years of Europa Park
    ​Something that separates Europa out from the competition is its sense of pride in its achievements. It's easy for a park owned by a coaster manufacturer to perhaps do this, investments after all are cheaper and as a showroom for the Mack products, it can afford to be perhaps more extravagant then others. I find this a cop out excuse though. The reason Europa Park is the best park in Europe (perhaps the world) is because it never rests on its laurels, it never slows down and it never stops improving. Back in 2013, massive works had been done to the rapids including a new lift hill building, animatronics and theming and a new tunnel to accommodate the rapids going over the pathway into Iceland. This time around two other rides were in the process of change. Columbus Dinghy, a simple boat carousel like Chessington's Seastorm had seen massive change with new queue line theming, a show during the ride and a simple addition of a steering wheel which allows the rider to control when the boat spins. A small change but massively changes the fun levels of the ride. And completely unnecessary as there was nothing wrong with the ride set up previously.
    The other two ride's to see a change is the rides Splash Battle, Whale Adventure. Now with the tag line 'Northern Lights'. It wasn't open unfortunately, still in construction but a massive change and I'll be interested if the water sprayers remain on the boats. Eurotower has been spruced up with new theming and a steampunk look.
    Other new additions include a new 40th anniversary parade, a new 4D show which was really fun, a travel escalator in the car park (WOO) and a new show called Fabulous Europe. This was a dud, essentially trying to imitate Disney's Soarin' but lacking any kind of cohesive flow or enjoyment.


    Scene 3 - Rides and Stuff
    Rides are Europas bread and butter. With so many, it's impossible to get them all done in a day. That being said, there has been some operational changes and it makes me slightly concerned. Firstly, Europa was always a park that wanted you in and out a seat as quickly as possible. That hasn't changed. What does seem different is that the rides weren't at full (or higher capacity). Now maybe it wasn't necessary as the park wasn't packed on our visit, but I was surprised to be hanging around for a few seconds in stations on Euro-Mir and Eurosat along with trains being deliberately stacked. Silver Star's third train never made an appearance, neither did the second Pegasus train. They also seemed pretty intent on checking bars which in previous years only happened on Wodan and Blue Fire. Now the only ride not really checked is Alpen Express, that was the only ride that ran with urgency.
    Arthur as a piece of ride hardware is sublime. It's an amazing piece of kit that train. The ride itself could be better. There's some parts of the ride show that don't live up to expectations such as the giant rat in which its pulley system is more noticeable then the rat itself or the fact the first screen on the ride is so in view of the queue that its effect is pretty much zero. I would love for a park like Phantasialand to get their hands on the hardware as they could do it absolute justice. Europa kind of dropped the ball on the ride experience on this one, even though I enjoyed the ride for what it was.

    And finally, I just wanted to show some pictures of how beautiful Europa is. Trip reports sometimes get stuck in a list of ride descriptions and misses what makes a park good or bad. This time around, I really wanted to appreciate what makes Europa special.

    Euro-Mir

    Switzerland

    Atlantica Supersplash and Portugal

    Austria

    Greece
    And with that another year of Europa Park had passed. Pleas visit this wonderful park. It deserves every accolade and every part of your attention.
    Scene 4 - Disneyland time
    I'll keep this brief. Visiting at the moment doesn't deliver the Disney experience that people probably deserve, at least if you're going primarily for the rides. With Space Mountain closed for a refurb, a lot of pressure is being put on Thunder Mountain and that seems to have terrible reliability. First day, it was closed, second day it opened at 12, third day it was on and off. With both main coasters down, rides like Indianna Jones and Phantom Manor have 45 minute queues. It's the first time I've ever used an Indy fasts or even seen it running. Beyond refurbs of Thunder and Space, another massive ride is required to spread those queues. A potential Star Tours 2 refurb in Discoveryland will only go so far. All the ride investment is in Studio Parc and even there was rammed. I'm never going to queue 55 minutes for RC Racer or 20 minutes for Slinky Dog. That's an insult.
    The park though is on the up and is a very different place from my first visit in 2013. Life seems to be returning such as a new spring time show, more meet and greets occurring regularly and the stages in Frontierland/Discoverylandcoming back into action. With Cafe Hyperion closed in Discoveryland, all the other food places on park were open. I couldn't believe my eyes to see Hakuna Matata open and actually serving food. Hopefully this isn't temporary and will continue to serve in future.



    So all in all a successful week. If you read this far, I thank you for your time. Till next time, Mark9 out.

  2. Mark9
    So another year passes and it only seems right to look back on 12 months of fun, thrills and excitement, in a way that only Mark9 can. So where do we start?
    January 2014 - Disneyland Paris
    Ok, sure, this trip only featured one new ride (Peter Pans Flight fact fans) but it also marked the occasion where I somehow managed 42 hours of consciousness, the trip where I took a nap during cinemagique and where Jamie fell asleep eating food in Hyperion. Yes there was fatigue and short tempers but it was a fantastic way to start a brand new year. From what looked like a flooded ferry to getting more rides on Tower of Terror.


    February 2014
    And now the season takes a slight down turn. This month featured my only trip to the Towers and this kind of epitomised Merlins year for me. Whilst Nemesis was running well (albeit on one train) and things like Spinball had minimal queues, there was no atmosphere in the park whatsoever. Usually during February there's excitement for the upcoming full season but not this time around. This year marks the first season since 2003 that I did not ride Oblivion and the first since opening that I didn't ride Rita, The Smiler or Thirteen. And part of me didn't even care. If it wasn't for Dan9's company this trip would have been completely forgettable.
    March 2014
    And then it was Thorpe's turn. Despite multiple rides on Inferno and The Swarm there was little to no energy in the park. The same old problems were occurring such as Slammer and Samurai closed or reliable issues up and down the place. Thank god for the company of the rest of TPM or I would have really despised my day out. And luckily with this month out of the way, the season really began...
    April 2014
    I had last visited Chessington in 2012, before Tomb Blaster had its queue line incident so had reasonably high expectations. And frankly, this was the star UK park for me. The park somehow looks rejuvenated in places and run down to hell in others. Unlike others, I like Scorpion Express and do think it has breathed life into a ride that was well beyond its sell by date when it closed in 2012. Zufari was rubbish even before I compare to Kilimanjaro but getting on rides like Fury and Vampire sent me into rose tinted glasses land. I do like Chessington in spite of its many, many faults.

    May 2014
    New Rollercoasters:-
    179. Medusa - Discovery Kingdom
    180. Kong - Discovery Kingdom
    181. Cobra - Discovery Kingdom
    182. V2: Vertical Velocity - Discovery Kingdom
    183. Superman - Ultimate Flight - Discovery Kingdom
    184. Roar - Discovery Kingdom
    185. Boomerang: Coast to Coaster - Discovery Kingdom
    186. Roadrunner Express - Discovery Kingdom
    187. Tatsu - Magic Mountain
    188. Apocalypse - Magic Mountain
    189. Superman: Escape from Kryptonite - Magic Mountain
    190. Goldrusher - Magic Mountain
    191. Riddlers Revenge - Magic Mountain
    192. Green Lantern - Magic Mountain
    193. Batman: The Ride (backwards) - Magic Mountain
    194. Scream - Magic Mountain
    195. Colossus - Magic Mountain
    196. Goliath - Magic Mountain
    197. Viper - Magic Mountain
    198. Ninja - Magic Mountain
    199. Full Throttle - Magic Mountain
    200. Big Thunder Mountain - Disneyland
    201. Matterhorn Bobsled B - Disneyland
    202. Space Mountain - Disneyland
    203. California Screamin’ - California Adventure
    204. Goofys Sky School - California Adventure
    205. Gadget Go Coaster - Disneyland
    206. Silver Bullet - Knotts Berry Farm
    207. Xcelerator - Knotts Berry Farm
    208. Coast Rider - Knotts Berry Farm
    209. Boomerang - Knotts Berry Farm
    210. Pony Express - Knotts Berry Farm
    211. Montezoomas Revenge - Knotts Berry Farm
    212. Jaguar - Knotts Berry Farm
    213. Sierra Sidewinder - Knotts Berry Farm
    214. West Coaster - Pacific Pier
    215. Matterhorn Bobsled A - Disneyland
    This of course was the flagship trip of the year, a visit that was two years in the making and had a lot too live up to. I can say for sure it lived up to the hype and features some of my favourite rides ever. Starting with the city of San Francisco, everyone should make as much effort as possible to this historic, cultural, awesome city. No one can fail to be disappointed by the Golden Gate Bridge or where history was made in the Castro. To the sealions down at Pier 39 or Alcatraz this place is amazing.

    The long, long, LONG drive to Magic Mountain is worth the distance. I know its reputation is low but it has a lot of original, decent rides including my favourite flyer, my favourite suspended and my favourite stand up. With strong support rides like Apocalypse, Goliath and Scream it should be on anyones radar to visit.

    Despite my negative comments in my trip report, I really did love Disneyland and California Adventure. From California Screamin' to Haunted Mansion it's really a place filled with such variety and within a stones throw of Los Angeles. Speaking of Los Angeles, despite not spending as much time as I had wished, walking up to the Hollywood sign will be something I always remember. That view is spectacular.

    And finally 24 hour day at Disneyland which was some feat. World of Color at 3:30 in the morning. Magical.

    A classic Liner

    An event in its own right

    One too many drinks in the Castro
    June 2014
    So June didn't see any theme park visits. Instead I decided to be cultural and visit the wonders of Amsterdam. I'm sure if you use your imagination you can just guess what I got up too. From the Red Light District too a club that features people that don't fit into gender brackets. It was a most enlightening trip.


    A cultural gin museum
    July and August 2014
    Ok, so I didn't go anywhere but I did get a mortgage and move into a new flat in the old Olympic village in Stratford.

    September 2014
    216. Helix - Liseberg
    217. Kanonen - Liseberg
    218. Balder - Liseberg
    219. Lisebergbanan - Liseberg
    Set hype levels to stun. This was the month of Helix, Mack's latest and greatest roller coaster. I've always heard a lot about Liseberg and suffice to say I was very happy with my trip. Excellent rides and roller coasters and a great time was had in Gothenburg nearby where I went into a scary submarine.


    October 2014
    Rather hastily, a trip to Phantasialand was booked, paid for and done just like that. I forgot how much I adored this place and was very glad to be back. I will not be leaving eight years in-between visits next time.

    November 2014
    And finally, to bookend the trips was Disneyland Paris to come and ride Ratatouille (and to finally get on Orbitron and Autopia) In a few years time, Ratatouille will be recognised as the fantastic ride that it truly is. This is Pixars greatest work since Toy Story 3 screen wise. Go and visit and see for yourself.
    And with that, my year in a nutshell. So what is the most notable rides of 2014?
    Best Water Ride:- Chiapas
    Best Dark Ride:- Ratatouille
    Best Rollercoaster:- Tatsu
    Biggest Surprise:- California Screamin'
    Best Park:- California Adventure
    And finally, the best new ride of 2014 goes too....
    ....
    ....

    None other then the utterly sublime Radiator Spring Racers. In my mind it will take a hell of a lot to top this in 2015. But then Europa Park is just around the corner..
    Thanks for reading, in fact thanks if you even made it this far down the page. Please feel free too leave comments below.
  3. Mark9

    Phantasialand in October

    By Mark9,

    It's been a long 14 years since my first trip to Phantasialand and despite my love affair with the park when I visited in 2006, It hadn't been a park on my radar to revisit. All it took though was a read of Benin's August trip report, some willing volunteers with the cash and just like that, it was off to Germany. For those that have never been, getting to the park is as easy as pie and incredibly cheap. I heartedly recommend it, despite having to fly on Easyjet at 7:05 in the morning as the train/bus system in Germany gets you to the park in less then an hour from the airport.
    For less then £200 we got two nights in Hotel Matamba, two days on the park and two fastracks for each of us. One thing we concluded on the trip was that the park is amazing value. Sure, it is one of the more expensive parks in Europe to get into but for the quality of ride you get and the cheapness in the park itself (5 euros for on ride photos, meals at fast food resauraunts for less then 8 euros, even better cocktails in the bar were cheap for European standards).
    With us all checked into the stunning Matamba (it really is stunning) we were off to the park. Despite some of the quality attractions held within, there is an aspect to the park that is stuck within the eighties. The entrance for instance is quite basic for example and doesn't look like it's seen any changes since the park opened. Reminded us of Epcot. We decided for our first ride would be the 2006 inverter, Black Mamba. Back when it first opened I thought it was a fantastic piece of work with a fast, intense ride cacooned within some intricate, detailed and beautiful theming. I'm happy to report, time has been kind to this ride and we all thoroughly enjoyed our rides. I disagree deeply with Benin on his analysis of the ride however. This is no Silver Bullet or Inferno that peeters out heavily at the end, this is a ride that maintains its intensity, speed and enjoyment from start to finish. The four inversions are taken right at the start of the ride, almost to get them out of the way quickly. The ride then takes on three high speed helices which I found pretty intense as the ride was running so well. I was even surprised to find a nice pop of air time as the ride dips into the first helix. The general ambience of the ride is the greatest of any B&M out there with only Oz'Iris giving any real competition. The level of detail is franklyy stunning so even if you aren't a fan of the ride itself, the theming and feel of the ride more then makes up for it. My only criticism is the aggressive staff. One actually pushed me backwards causing me to hit my head on the top of the train. Completely unnecessary on a walk on, one train operated ride.




    With the Biting ride done, we headed to the new for 2013 but actually opened in 2014 ride, Chiapas. First and foremost, this is for me, is the most beautiful ride in Europe. Everything about it has been designed to the nth degree. From the surrounding pathways which afford great views of the ride, to the queueline and ride itself intertwined so perfectly into a neat little package, there is nothing else quite like it. Even the queue itself, with the batching lanes being divided into fastpass, single riders, groups of twos and everyone else shows that thought has been put into how this ride is operationally run. Well it's top level and shows effort unmatched by anywhere else. But what about the ride itself? I have never come across a water ride run in such a precise and technically perfect way anywhere. Intamin have worked magic here with the different ride systems running perfectly in sync so that the ride show never feels under threat by the ride mechanics. The backwards room in particular is a highlight as is the final drop that feels far steeper and longer then it looks. Everyone comes off of this ride with a smile because it's fun. I in general hate Log flumes, but this goes to the top of my class and is easily my favourite water ride.


    Talocan was our next ride. I've never done a floorless top spin before as the one at Knotts was closed on my visit. Suffice to say, the theming and ride show really helps to push Talocan as a top tier attraction because the ride itself isn't as grand as everything else around it. That being said, this was one of the better ride cycles I've done but I still can't rate this as high as other much more appropriate and interesting flat rides. The restrain in particular was slightly odd as the bottom has a nice sharp pointy bit that could cause a lot of men to be unable to have children in the future. You have been warned.


    Back in 2000, Colorado was the main attraction if you like. Now, with Mamba, Winjas and Chiapas to help lighten the load, Colorado Adventure takes president as the main family rollercoaster on site. And it truly is a wonderful Vekoma mine train. The only real problem for it though is the first part of the ride. With the removal of other attractions and the addition of Chiapas, half of the indoor area has been removed exposing the ride itself. The job is clearly half finished as well as corregated steel sticks out over pathways and the shed area is completely on show. Which is a true shame as it ruins the illusion that this is a western themed ride. Luckily the ride after the second lift hill is intact and what follows in the dark is hair-raising. Truly scary with the ride jerking you around back and forth and you have no idea where you are going. Part of Colorados charm is that it can go from sedate little mine train to throwing you back and forth with no warning. The final helix in particular is excellent. I felt like I was dying or about to. It's fantastic.

    On our travels we took on the omnimover which can be descibed as Chinese Haunted Mansion. It's main flaw was that it was way to light in there at one point the view is solely a fire exit, illuminated up all nicely for your pleasure. River Quest followed which is a terrifying experience for all involved and makes it the only rapids ride that I'm not a fan off. We next ventured onto Mystery Castle which was terrifying as a 12 year old, but completely underwhelming as an adult. I like the idea of all of us strapped to the castle walls but the ride itself isn't scary enough. Nice concept blown by a rather blase ride.

    With this side of the park done, we went over to the Berlin and Wuze Town. Our first port of call was Winjas, the Maurer spinners featuring trick track. I was suitably impressed with Fear in particular but this time I was a bit more warey. When it comes to spinning rides, I expect a little bit of spinning but these two don't spin too well. Fear I found was better at it but both have a severe lack of it. The other thing is the trick track of the see saw and moving track kind of threaten the flow of the ride, they break the pacing and the rhythm. Thankfully, Fear has a surprise immelman.

    With Phantasialand, there is a real drop on quality on this side of the park probably to do with its location near local housing. Temple of the Knight Hawk is a dismal attempt at a Space Mountain rip off. It doesn't impress and left 'Fred', Dan9 and Tom feeling ill. The problem is it just isn't interesting enough and just goes round and round almost bored of itself. A similar effect can be felt on the Hollywood Ride, a rather dismal attempt at evoking Hollywood glamour but just coming across as cheap and run down. Sad and terrible is the only words I can use to describe it as. We tried on other rides in the area such as the Splash Battle which features no splash battling and nothing to really aim at, no effects whatsoever. We also tried out the Race to Atlantis which might have been good back in the eighties but is no longer relevant. Pirates 4D was a nice kick back to Thorpe when it was an up and coming theme park in the 2000's and the final ride to really talk about is Maus de Chocolat. I don't like the shooting system really in the same way that I don't like Toy Story Manias shooting style. I just can't get the hang of it which means I always lose. Sad times. I love the theming around it even if it is just a Ratatouille film rip off.
    So thats the theme park. A wonderful place to visit with half the park being ahead of the game and the other half sadly lacking. Luckily, the awesomeness of Mamba, Chiapas and Colorado really stick in the mind. The management here know what they're doing and it's a joy to visit. I recommend staying at Matamba as well, with a true ambience and joy to it. I even tried Zebra in the hotel restauraunt.


    A yummy Black Mamba cocktail!
    Thanks foe reading.
  4. Mark9
    To break up the flow of Benin Germany trip reports ( ), I've written a little something about my trip to Liseberg. Anyone who follows me on twitter or Facebook, probably knows what's coming. Alas, this will be a more detailed account of my trip.
    So I'm just going to start with, great park. It features a good selection of flat rides, a well paced fun rapids ride and a very peculiar log flume. There's not many parks which have four very re-rideable roller coasters and Liseberg arguably has three that you can ride over and over again. Well what about the fourth? Well this is where my report begins, Kanonen, an Intamin launch coaster that I know many on here don't like. In theory I shouldn't either. It demonstrates everything I don't like about the majority of Intamin rides such as those horrible restraints, lowish throughput, an attempt at a ride that should never got off the ground. And yet after the first ride I thought it was fine. The more I rode it the more I really liked it. I can't put my finger on why either. The launch for example feels like there's a trim at the end as the train loses speed very quickly. The top hat isn't anything to write home about. I like the vertical loop which has a lot of hang time as the train pretty much struggles to get round it. The stengel turn contorts the train horrifically and ironically, the ground hugging turn kills any momentum the ride previously had. And the inline which is fitted into a tight corner, barely making it before slamming into the breaks. It shouldn't be enjoyable, in fact most don't like it I'm rather fond of its unassumingness.



    So to put into perspective, this is nowhere near a top ten ride. That's okay though, as it's never going to pretend to be one, it never had an ambition to be fighting it out with Katun and Nemesis. No this is a take it or leave it launch ride. I'll take it but I know most will ignore and never return.
    With that little bit of awkward out the way, lets now go onto the big guns, Balder a big player in the Mitch Hawker poll and the 2nd most popular (queue wise) ride at Liseberg. I want to put it out there that ironically, whilst being quite tolerant of rough rides, when it comes to woodies I expect a bit of the old shaky. These are rides that feel more organic then constructed, the wood flexing and creaking as a train rushes through its circuit, I expect a bit of activity, I'm fond of being thrown about a bit. Balder is not that ride. Balder is more concerned with treating you nicely, chucking you into forceful ejector hill at every hill but never pushing it too far. I think that's more a failing then a positive actually. Every hill chucks you into the same thrilling sensation and when it does 7/8 of the same type of hill it does get a bit predictable.

    With that being said, it is a top tier ride. There isn't another woodie that I've previously been on that delivers such constant air time as this. Even the stunning Tonnerre de Zeus does lose a bit of momentum 3/4's of the way through. Here Balder delivers a thrilling and fast ride from first drop to break run. The little humps in particular are the rides highlight. One of the better woodies in Europe certainly but as relentless and out of control as Wodan? Not a chance.
    [interestingly, my partner Chris, said Balder was boring and was so predictable that he found it hard to enjoy]
    Onto a more classic attraction and a ride whose name I can't say without adding more ananana, it's Lisebergbanan, a classic if I ever did see one. This if you like is Schwarzkopfs crowning glory, a testament to the awesomeness of their rides, a people eating machine that is much loved by all that visit the theme park. One I thing I'm a big fan of is how it utilises the natural hillside to create a pacey, well designed attraction. Whilst never truly leaving its ground hugging nature, it uses the energy of the train in neat ways and never needs an extra kick like a second lift hill or launch area to get the train going again. We could use more rides like this in the modern era, too many parks concern themselves with gimmicks or tag lines and forget that getting through people should matter more then anything else. A fond favourite and very good in the dark.

    And now, finally; Helix.

    Instead of going through a full analysis of why Helix is so awesome, I'm just going to cover a few basis. I don't want to give too much away here for those who haven't been yet.
    1. The drop out of the station into the corkscrew is a sublime way to start the ride.
    2. The two air time hills are absolutely fabulous. By the end of my two days, the tops of my legs were aching from the sheer amount of air time.
    3. The turn after the first air time hill is incredible. Think Nemesis's first helix and then add a lap bar, it's an incredible moment.
    4. The middle half of the ride is sublime, seriously sublime. I cannot think of a ride out there that is as well paced and relentless as this. A perfect combination of layout, ride train and intensity.
    5. The second launch into the largest inversion on the ride is brilliant. Look out over the park on your ride and just enjoy.\
    6. The second air time hill. So good, it deserves a second mention. Utterly deceptive and yet awesome.
    7. A fast moving queue line is always a good thing. If the queue is out the door, it's only an hour long. Worth the wait and then some.

    So the real question when it comes to it is.. is it better then Blue Fire? I'm going to be controversial and say no. Blue Fire is far more fun and likeable then Helix but don't let that be a criticism. It's like saying do you want a million pounds or a million and one pounds. Both rides are so sublime and top of the field that it becomes irrelevant. And unfortunately in this age of lists and top tens, one has to be slightly better then the other. When it comes to the criticisms of Helix being it's throughput is slightly lower or its theming isn't quite as consistent as Blue Fire, thats just picking at straws. What we are seeing with these two rides is a demonstration of Mack's perfection. Intamin hasn't a hope of catching them now, even if their new lap bar is any good, it's too late for them to catch up with the diversity and perfection of the Mack model. All I ask is that the UK gets one soon, don't let this concept get away from us. Because if we got one, I'd have no doubt that Nemesis would be toppled from the top of the roost..

  5. Mark9
    Two months later, with the dust settled on my trip I already look back with great fondness. I've talked about the theme parks but what about the culture of California. How different is it to the humid and tourist trap that is Florida. Many UK enthusiasts don't venture past the state with all the oranges for obvious reasons.
    First thing is people in California are thinner then the East side. Disney World is full of ECV's, California has very few. Florida theme parking is one big bubble of tourists, California is far more about making your own way around without the aid of specially put on buses and taxis. The first thing that struck me about San Francisco is the hills and the beautiful scenery of the downtown area. It looks fantastic from afar, with the golden gate bridge a particular highlight (although Chris said it doesn't look any better the the Humber bridge; spoilsport). As is the culture we had a lot of Starbucks on the trip. It doesn't help that on every block lies a Starbucks or a Chipotle or a Starbucks.

    San Francisco is also incredibly hilly, we took a walk around the outer ring and some of the hills are murderous. We wandered over to the Castro, the gay area of San Fran and where history was made. Anyone interested should read up on Harvey Milk, the first gay politician elected into office and subsequently murdered a few months later. The area has an ease about it and is an excellent place to watch an Austrian drag act win Eurovision.


    On day three, our adventures took us over to the Golden Gate Bridge, an iconic American landmark. It is a beautiful sight to behold and even though we accidentally drove over it, I had a real appreciation for its significance.

    Our destination was actually the Walt Disney Museum, an essential place to visit for any Disney park or film fan. Fantastic place where you see the history of a man who changed the world we live in. From his early days creating Oswold and Mickey to designing the worlds first true theme park. This was a man ahead of his time in more ways then one. Essential viewing.



    And then next was Pier 39, home for a bunch of sealions who make a lot of noise and have a lot of fights. Quite smelly too. But this was where we had an American sized lunch which was impossible to finish. We gave it our best shot.

    And after four days of Touring this wonderful place, it was time to pack our bags and head to Magic Mountain and onto Los Angeles. Tune in next time. If you want too.
  6. Mark9
    Alarm set for 4am. Check

    Pin badges and Oswald hat ready. Check

    Coffee. Check

    It was time to take on the ultimate theme park challenge, 24 hours in two of the busiest theme parks in the world. Even on paper it doesn’t sound easy. Luckily there was things on our side. We knew Pirates of the Caribbean and ‘it’s a small world’ would have reopened so extra capacity at Disneyland. We knew kids wouldn't be able to take on this challenge and we knew many wouldn’t attempt such a feat so the first few hours were cruical. So with that in mind, we arrived via driving through the middle of Los Angeles at Disneyland at around 5:45. A giant Olaf snowman had been sculpted on the entrance way and to open the parks was none other then Josh Gadd, of Frozen fame. He spoke about living near Disney World (BOO!) and how he takes his kids to the Disney parks like a right of passage. With that the parks were opened.



    Oh hey Olaf!


    Fireworks get the parks opened! Here we go!


    We had decided early on to get into California Adventure first and grab a Radiator Springs fastpass. Our thinking was to get the busiest rides out the way first so we could relax on the longer rides later in the day. We grabbed ourself an information leaflet for the day and bad news. Radiator Springs, Tower and California Screamin’ wouldn’t be opening till eight. That left us two hours to find something to do. We tried Toy Story Midway Mania but that wasn’t ready yet, so Little Mermaid was chosen. We then had a go on Soarin’ which opened at 6:30, and then onto Mickey’s Fun Wheel. Wow. This is a ferris wheel which offers stationary pods and ones that swing violently. We naturally chose swinging and what a ride. Seriously more intense then it looks and only the second ride I’ve done that offers sick bags in the pods. It was now around 7:30 and we decided to head towards Flo’s via Radiator Springs to see if fast pass was available. SUCCESS! It was. Whilst Chris went to get the coffees, I grabbed our fastpasses which was for 9:30am. We relaxed for a bit, after all, there was plenty of time left. 8 o clock was finally upon us and we went for a ride on the Tower (grabbing a fast pass too) which was as spell bounding as ever, a ride on Heimlichs chew chew train, Tower then took a gamble. We decided to queue for RC Racers, after all fast pass hadn’t started and this was the only reasonable time to try it. If you know the queueline, we were just under the bridge near the entrance. From there it took us exactly 18 minutes to get onto the ride. Faster then using fast pass the week before. So there you go people, the detrimental effects of any fast pass system right in front of your eyes. We decided therefore to do it again. And it took us 15 minutes this time. People have queued six hours for this thing and here we were essentially casually strolling on without a care in the world.

    Astounded by this turn of luck, our fast pass turn was quickly upon us. And then it broke down. We had to wait an hour for it to come back to life, so I decided to have a lie down instead of getting depressed about things.





    Finally free we descended on California Screamin’, grabbing a fast pass and queuing for Toy Story Mania. It took about 25 minutes to get on and we got exactly the same score somehow. With five minutes remaining till our fastpass, we rode King Tritons Carousel and then rode Screamin’, good as ever. It was now around 11:30 and basically time to jump ships and visit Disneyland. It only seemed natural that our first stop should be Pirates of the Caribbean but naturally we grabbed an Indianna Jones fast pass. Now Pirates. This is a classic ride and no mistake. It makes the Florida and Paris versions look like mere imitations in my opinion.This version evokes such an incredible atmosphere, there is just something about being transported away to that period of time, to not be able to see the roof of the shed sticking out in the pirate boat attack scene or for the journey to be more leisurely paced then its brothers. Captain Jack isn’t necessary but he doesn't detract from this enriching, engaging experience. It’s popularity here is incredible. Hundreds of people joining the queue every minute, each one eagerly anticipating Walt’s last ride he was involved in before he died. I loved it. It’s my favourite ride at Disneyland.


    Alas, it was time to move on, we ended up in Fantasyworld for a little ride on its a small world. This one takes on the Paris look of having an outside loading area but unlike Paris, this one is a series of show rooms and not just one big warehouse. And here the props are far much larger and interesting then I’ve seen previously. My favourite hula girls also appeared here with speedy hips so that made me happy. Time for a ride on the other side of Matterhorn, the Tomorrowland side. Felt quite similar to the other one although Chris found this side rougher. We still had a while until Indianna Jones so we entered Tomorrowland and rode on Buzz Lightyear’s Spin thing. I officially hate all three versions of this ride so far. Dull, Dull, Dull. At least this one didn’t have fastpass. Before heading to Indianna we grabbed a fast pass for Star Tours, went and had some chicken on Main Street then rode Indianna Jones Temple where some more effects seemed to be working this time. That was good. With luck our Star Tours fast pass time was upon us but before we headed over that way we grabbed a Thunder Mountain night time ride fast pass and knowing the parade was on, waited near the Storybook Canal Boats. Somehow this had alluded us on our trips, it business and random closing times meaning we never got a look in. This time we somehow started the queue for it, meaning we’d be the first on when it reopened. Totally different world to Paris where there it’s walk on all the time. I like the cast members talking to us though, nice feature. Rode Star Tours then headed down to potentially queue for Splash. I wasn’t keen, 65 minutes for a ride that I don’t really like wasn’t worth it so we queued five minutes for Winnie the Pooh instead. By now it was around six o clock and to slow the pace down a bit we headed to Fantasyland to get rides on Pinocchio and Snow White. With twelve hours left of the day we still felt okay to carry on but it is hard going to keep the energy levels high.

    Fastpass Top trumps. I think I win.

    We decided not to bother with Space Mountain either and decided to get some snacks to give us an energy boost. It was soon time for Fantasmic and the fireworks. We didn’t move once Fantasmic ended, instead choosing to watch the fireworks from a distance. Works just as well. Our plan was to try and get on Pirates before the second Fantasmic started but unfortunately got caught in the one way system. So instead we had a go on Jungle Cruise which was walk on. The cast member this time was a bit of a mumbler so didn’t catch much of her jokes. We got off and Fantasmic was about to start. We darted into Pirates queue and luckily wouldn't be exciting as Fantasmic finishes (would be disaster). Pirates <3

    After our ride we went and saw the Tiki room show which I am a big fan off. This was a chance to rest our feet, necessary after nearly 18 hours of Disney parks. After Tiki, it was Thunder Mountain time where the fast pass queue and stand by queue had become one big sprawl of people; it wasn’t pretty but we made it. And what a ride in the dark it is. So much fun especially as its barely lit up at all. Wonderful stuff. We had no more fast pass energy left and somehow we ended up in Tomorrowland. Space Mountain seemed to be dead so we decided to ride Autopia. I hate this ride too, it seems like such an unnecessary waste of space especially in a park as small and compact as this. Unfortunately we also had to sit in the car for ages as one had stopped somewhere around the circuit. BROKEN! We were evacuated from the ride and decided to call it a day at Disneyland. California Adventure was calling with a 3am showing of World of Colour. There’s nothing like standing in the cold at 3am in the morning and being sprayed with water for thirty minutes. With Screamin’ and Radiator Springs Racers closing at 4 we raced (pun not intended) over to get a go but both had closed already and with Tower the only major ride still running after 4 (but with a tasty 120 minute queue) we decided to call it a day. We’d made it to 22 hours and I especially knew I had driving to do in the morning.



    TOWER! I love you but 120 minutes is just to long at 4 in the morning.

    So what can I say about the day. It is a hard hard day of theme parking and takes the patience of a saint. It says something that the night-time shows finish and you still have essentially a day at Alton Towers left before the parks close. I whole-heartedly recommend it though as the parks have a special atmosphere like no other. Getting on Pirates was the icing on the cake.

    And with that, thats the theme park side of the holiday done and dusted. Whilst I would love to have done some of the other parks in the area, that can be done another time around. For now though, we had done some of the most famous theme parks in America and I have to say I was so impressed with the rides on the west coast. The B&M's and Intamins in Florida are kind of hit and miss but over in California, each one was ridable and enjoyable. Special mention goes to the two floor less coasters of Medusa and Scream. They were great.
    I'd like to thank anyone thats read all my trip reports. You guys rule
  7. Mark9
    Please note my heart loves Disneyland. It’s the original theme park and deserves to be loved for this fact alone. In saying that, objectively, the park has some crippling faults which if I wasn’t a sympathetic enthusiast, may have completely ruined my day.



    After our two days at Magic Mountain it was time to quicken the pace with the Disney parks. Gone were the five minute queues and here were the 30 minute plus waits to get on Haunted Mansion. Here is the grand daddy of them all, the park that Walt built, the park he held so much pride and love for. Here was where all the rules are set such as the iconic hub and spoke design of Main Street plaza or the idea of the rides as shows and the staff as cast members. He personally oversaw the cleaning of the park every morning so that every day the park gleamed and sparkled. It’s hard not to well up when seeing the train pulling into the entrance station or the castle appearing around the corner in all its glory. Well first thing is the castle is tiny. No surprises here, it was the first and built on a very tight budget back in the 50’s. It’s not its fault that it has been superseded twice over by Florida and Paris.


    And this is generally the theme of the park. And its the thing that does threaten to derail the day. Everything is on a smaller scale to other kingdom parks. That would be absolutely fine if it had the guest attendance to match but it doesn’t. For the past few years the park has seen 16 million people pass through its doors and at times it feels like the park is at breaking point. And what doesn’t help is the numerous refurbs going on. During our first part of the visit we had no Pirates of the Caribbean, It’s a Small World, Alice in Wonderland or Nemos Submarine Voyage. Two of those are absolute Disney classics that eat through people like candy and two novelty rides that I hadn’t experienced anywhere else. On our first day every queue was spilling out of the respective rides entrances. Trying to walk through the minuscule Adventureland past Indianna Jones was a trial of patience and whoever put the Astro orbiter at the very entrance to Tomorrowland, basically on Main Street and then decided that Star Tours and Buzz Lightyear should be on either side completely blocking the pathway into the area needs shooting. It can create such a negative impression to just see crowds and no clear way through.

    So to end this negativity thats go on to some positives. Our first stop (as always is) was Big Thunder Mountain, recently reopened after a lengthy 18 month refurbishment. It looks absolutely sublime with its new track and new effects. It is much better themed then Paris and Florida and only loses to the Paris version because of Paris’s epic beginning and ending. I approve of the use of physical effects being added into the third lift hill area as it feels so much more real to have smoke and sound effects. The other two’s third lift hills are rather.. dull. So big thumbs up.

    We grabbed a fastpass for Indianna Jones and headed to the rather stately Haunted Mansion. I adore this ride in Florida and I love it even more here. Next was Splash Mountain which I didn’t like. I don’t mind water rides but this is too wet. Especially as its only really the front that gets soaked it feels like adding insult to injury. I was definitely not in the laughing place after this. Winnie the Pooh here is very unpopular probably because of its location in the park (always 45 minutes at Disney World). It was fine though.


    Time for Indianna (before our ride we grabbed another fast pass). Now I’m not really sure of the intention but I am guessing this is supposed to be far more comedic then the terrifying Dinosaur at Animal KIngdom. I recognised parts of the layout. I think some of my.. I don’t want to say problems but I guess thats what they are is that parts of the temple are very lightly lit up whether by fire or by spot lighting so I never truly felt at peril as I could always see the car in front of us doing its thing. Maybe thats part of the storyline, that we are part of an expedition. Amazing queue line though, full of details and interactive elements and some aspects of the ride such as the boulder are absolutely top notch. Sometimes it didn’t work or we just remained stationary under a hanging Indianna for 20 seconds. Stacking issues aren’t good people, just get on the damn ride. I hate to sound like I didn’t like the ride because I really did. It’s just not faultless.

    Next stop was the Jungle Cruise which I really enjoyed for some reason. I just seemed to be into the corny jokes when normally I want them to stop. Knowing Walt was the making of the ride probably helped. We had another go on Indianna then headed back to Main Street to grab our first time badges and have some lunch. At this point we noticed Space Mountain which was supposed to be closed was actually open. Hoorah! With this in mind we grabbed ourself a fast pass as it was displaying a 50 minute queue then headed to Fantasyland. This must really be the smallest area in the park. Eleven rides squished into an area that simply cannot cope. We decided to go for it (we had no choice really) and did them in anti-clockwise order. First was Snow White which is the same as Paris and the old Florida version, then Pinocchio which was the same as Paris. Yay for clones. I like these rides though, so charming and unassuming. And the queues always move very quickly. Our next stop was Casey Jr. Completely different to Paris, for example here we waited twenty minutes, there we walked straight on. Secondly this is more like a proper train ride through the storybook area. Its fine. We then headed to Mr Toads Wild ride. I’m not sure why this is considered such a classic. It’s okay in itself but not exemplary. We then chose to ride Peter Pans Flight just to say we’ve done it. I still don’t like any of the versions I’ve done. It zooms too fast through the story and misses out key moments.



    We headed off to Mickeys Toon Town to ride Rodger Rabbits Cartoon Spin. Wasn’t the biggest fan of this as it was a bit ZANY but lacking in actual fun. Ah well, can’t win them all. Eventually, after many attempts it was finally time for Matterhorn Bobsleds which interestingly is in Fantasyland and even more interestingly had a minor incident involving an injury to a cast member that very morning. This thing is just crazy with track looked like it was carved with a chisel. I was impressed that no supports seem to be in view, the track looks like it is part of the mountainside. And I also aproove of working yetis. I’m not sure if I liked either side though particularly strongly. I recognise its achievement and the technical know how to make the ride.



    Parade time, great parade some very interesting floats and choices made on characters liked. Anything involving the three Caballeros gets my thumbs up anytime. Not a fan of using Mary Poppins as the last float though, boring! Onto Tomorrowland after avoiding it all day. First was Space Mountain which was pretty laughable really. The music makes it seem like a cheesy vision of the future and space travel. People think this is better then Florida and Paris. I don’t agree with them, its a generic space travel themed ride with a high throughput. Nothing more. For something a bit (read a lot) better was Star Tours which is insanely popular here. We used fast pass to get our go and really enjoyed it. We both found this Tomorrowland really underwhelming whether its Autopia still existing, Nemo still closed or the remains of Rocket Rod Racers splaced around the place. It felt like it was severely missing something.



    With night-time starting to descend we had food in a New Orleans themed restaurant then prepared for the onslaught of Magical (The firework display) and then Fantasmic around the rivers of America. This is when Disneylands size really starts to buckle. We chose the fireworks first as we thought it would give us the best chance of seeing both properly. We were wrong. The firework show was fine, if a little boring. I liked Dumbo flying and also appreciated the use of songs and films from when Walt was alive. But then we tried to get to the Fantasmic viewing area. The park turns into a huge one way system as it is the only way to cope with the crowds. Frontierland becomes an entrance and Adventureland becomes an exit. If you visit, don’t bother getting a fast pass for any ride in this area as you will never reach the ride you want to go on. The only possible chance we got of getting a good view was to stand on a terrace far away from the rivers of America because it is the only place we were allowed to stand. Cast Members vigurously patrol the pathways meaning no one will stand in an area they aren’t allowed in. Most tedious. Fantasmic here is good but I don’t think it’s better then the one in Florida. I know some will disagree but I can’t help feel Fantasmic in Florida feels like a event, in California its just another show. The main real change is here instead of Pocahontas we have Peter Pan. The pirate boat is a great set piece but more crucially it isn’t that dynamic. If you are on either side of the lake you can’t see any of the action so you just get the soundtrack with random lines from the film played through. The odd gun shot fires but I didn’t find it that engaging. Lucking the dragon here is a beautiful piece of artistry, its head rearing over the fountains as if Maleficent really has transformed in front of your eyes. Its death is also fantastically done as electricity looks to spark through its body as it screams in agony. Great stuff and very entertaining. Rest of the night was a ride on Splash Mountain (where I got soaked) and then bed time.

    Looking back over what I’ve written it sounds far more negative then I actually intended. I think the criticism is warranted because the park realistically is not designed to cope with 16 million people like its East Coast and European brother is (and to be fair when it opened, 4 million was its original yearly gate figure). What doesn’t help is having four rides (one my absolute favourite dark ride) down for refurb and no attractions like Carousel of Progress, Philarmagic or Country Bear Jamboree around to spread crowds. They get eaten up as their unpopularity means they take up valuable space in a park that has very little of it. When it comes to it, expectation for a Disney park in unparalleled in the world. These are the grandmasters with rides that work harder then any other on the planet. If it sounds like I am being unfair I can only apologise because I really did have fun.

    Luckily 24 hour day was even more successful but thats not another story. For now its on and upwards to California Adventure.
  8. Mark9
    As some of you may know, I've been over in California for two weeks embracing the west coast. In that time Chris and I visited five new theme parks and went on some of the most well known rides out there. So to start off with;
    Six Flags Discovery Kingdom


    I don’t know many people that have been to this park so for me, it would live or die based on how my trip was to go. The day started relatively badly. A heavy hangover from the Eurovision celebrating the night before meant some hangover coffee and food was required from Starbucks. Nevertheless, we sobered up and drove the 40 minute drive to one of two Six Flag parks in California. Now, when it comes to Six Flags, enthusiasts always come across as frosty. It’s reputation is near the bottom of the barrel. Reports of poor operations, rude and unhelpful staff ad dirty, littered areas are common complaints. I’m happy to report none of these came across on this particular visit.

    Access to the park was swift, we purchased annual passes (at $100 each including parking and discounts it was a steal!) and made our way over to our first ride and my first new B&M since Dæmonen last year, Medusa. Now our first mistake was to take our bags into the queue so unfortunately our first ride was actually my first ride as Chris sat it out to put bags in lockers ($5 for all day use in all lockers in the park, very good value!).



    Now, when it comes to the Floridian B&M’s they were very hit and miss. They are either large and overblown but over rated like Hulk and Montu or they little pieces of perfection like Manta and Kumba. Having already ridden Superman de Acero, Kraken and Dæmonen, I was fully aware that the floor less riding seat wasn’t the be all and end all of these rides. When it comes to Medusa I just took it for what it was; a glorified sit down ride. I have to say I really enjoyed it. It gets away with a few things though. For example it is as much of a car park coaster as Scream is at Magic Mountain. But that doesn’t effect the ride experience much at all. Secondly it’s oversized vertical loop, dive roll and zero g roll are a lot of fun. There is so much hang time throughout the inversions and it has that old style, B&M aggressiveness that some would say are missing from modern day Beemers. The Sea-Serpent roll which features exclusively to B&M rides on here isn’t that great but is the only dull moment on this ride. After the MCBR, the ride hots up with some very forceful helixes over the faded car park white lines. These are all taken at ground level and feel very quick. The corkscrews are also very quick and intense and the final helix is great fun.


    I have a feeling that Medusa was running so well because of the heatwave that California was having at the time. It was 37 degrees on our visit, (absolutely stifling weather) and all the rides were running fast. This helped Medusa in particular as it just seemed to have that extra wallop. It was running two trains the whole day and the staff were giving great guest interaction. I thought they were supposed to be unfriendly idiots and no interest in the guests. Not true here. I found their visual check spins quite funny as they put their arms at full length, say visual check and spin on the spot. So, first ride down, three rides done on Medusa (two in the back row, one in the front) and a fantastic start to the theme park trips.




    Our next stop was Kong, a Vekoma SLC. My only other experience with this ride type is Infusion at Blackpool. This wasn’t too bad although it was definitely a slight head banger. We had one front row ride on our trip, no more goes were required.

    Next stop was the weirdly named Sky Screamer, a glorified wave swinger that gave great views of Medusa and nothing more. This was closely followed by Cobra, a Zierer junior coaster which wasn't too bad, not too dull but nothing crazy.

    We stopped for a little bit too have some water and chill out and then head to our next batch of rides. Discovery Kingdoms entrance is weirdly placed between areas. On your left is Medusa and Kong, over the entrance is V2 and to your right is Superman:Ultimate Flight and Roar. So naturally our next stop was the other coaster corner starting with V2

    Starting with V2 (Vertical Velocity), this is an Intamin impulse coaster that has a weird angled piece of track at one end and a vertical spike at the other. The ride launches you one way then the other then back again until you reach nearly the end of the track. Weirdly the zero g at one of the end is angled oddly so sometimes you get halfway through the inversion and others you make it the whole way through. Oddly, this never had a queue but this may be down to its poor reliability as it seemed to rarely run through our day.

    Next up was Superman: Ultimate Flight, a premier launch roller coaster that won awards a few years ago for its original ride design. I can understand that, it is pretty out there in terms of rides but it has a fatal flaw. It’s poor throughput means queues can rise quickly. Luckily it was relatively quiet on our visit but I can imagine long waits on busier days. So with that being said, how is the ride. Yeah its good, the constant launching back and forth through the station feels very good and the ride definitely has some good bum of seat action. It also features a good amount of air time and the sensation of speed is there in bucket loads. I just question whether parks can justify such a low throughput ride.


    Our final major roller coaster was Roar, a wooden coaster built by GCI, the masters behind Wodan at Europa Park. Before our visit, Roar was a very unloved ride, thrown aside by the enthusiast community (well.. TPR) for being rough and uncomfortable. Luckily, the ride had a slight refurbishment with track being replaced before our visit so the question was, could it take down Wodan.

    No it can’t.

    But it shares many characteristics with the German version such as the relentless sensation and the amazing sense of speed as you are thrown left and right the whole way around the circuit. The first drop was a particular highlight. The rest of the circuit kind of melted into one in my mind. Suffice to say we enjoyed both our rides on this ride even though it only ran one train. The other didn't seem to be around at all.

    So with the major rides all done it was time to kick back and enjoy the rest of what the park had to offer. A nice lake surrounds the park affording it a nice scenic view. We had some nice chicken and chips and then went around the zoo area. We were slightly surprised by how close we could get to the animals such as the giraffes and elephants. You could also pay to ride the elephants around a little enclosure.

    Next up was Boomerang: Coast to Coast or as I refer to it as, my first Vekoma Boomerang. I’ve heard the horror stories and the outlook wasn’t great. But you know what, I thought it was fine. Sure there was the odd jerky sensation but I’ve had worse. It certainly wasn’t uncomfortable.
    In the park is several huss creations such as a top spin (that had no water thankfully) and there was little roller coasters for the kids dotted around. Our final stop was a show with Dolphins called Drench. With marine life being a hot potato at the moment, what with the Blackfish documentary this show had a slight edge for me. The dolphins looked well looked after and seemed well treated so erm.. not much more I can add to either side of the argument.


    So to conclude. Discovery Kingdom. Done a large floorless or a decent woodie before? Probably not going to add much to your interests. But if you want to go to somewhere relatively ignored in UK coaster circles, somewhere that does have genuine charm and some cracking good rides then you can’t go far wrong then Discovery Kingdom.
  9. Mark9

    Drop it like it's hot.

    By Mark9,

    In 2012, I was assigned to write a feature for Colossus's tenth birthday. The article itself was my best work if I don't say so myself. It was my intention that I would be able to do a similar piece when it came to 2003's blisteringly hot but underwhelmingly* tepid Nemesis Inferno in 2013. But this did not happen. No matter what I wrote, constructed or thought about, inspiration abandoned me and I just couldn't put together a piece that would do Inferno justice. And the problem comes down to one sticking point;
    There is just nothing special about Nemesis Inferno.

    Nemesis Inferno, distinctly middle of the road.
    But worry not fellow Thorpe fanboys and coaster nerds for the story doesn't end there. It is for that reason that for me, Nemesis Inferno is one of Thorpe's very best roller coasters and one that I get the most pleasure out of riding during a visit. Let me tell you a tale about a ride that was hyped to the max, but could never reach those lofty heights.
    Back in 2002, Colossus had done unexpected things for Thorpe, it's visitor numbers rising and rising and the construction of a brand new Inverter would have been a spectacular thing indeed for English enthusiasts. Remember, we are talking about a time when Nemesis most definitely ruled the roost in the UK and unless you were up for travelling to America, Italy or Spain, chances are it was your only shot. The hype surrounding Inferno was definitely something different, particularly when it was associated with the Nemesis name. I can remember at the time, discussion on Inferno's finale helixes being discussed as potentially as intense as Nemesis's helix after its first inversion. Talk about building the hype.

    Of course, come April 2003, Inferno opens and it isn't quite as good as it's predecessor. My favourite description at the time was a ride on Inferno's front row was not as intense as a ride on the Happy Halibuts of Octopus Garden. Talk about damning a product.
    At the time, with only Colossus complimenting Inferno, it came under harsher criticism then it probably deserved. With only two major roller coasters** to keep customers happy, Inferno came under the limelight in a way that many rides do not. After all, inverters had really boomed in the 90's with the Batman clones being installed all across America and rides that dominated their respected parks like Katun, Montu and Alpengeist. By 2003, with new types of rides starting to dominate such as sky hogging mega coasters and Intamin's brand new launch technology breaking record after record it's easy to see why Inferno was not enough and why Inferno could actually be seen as a bit, old hat.

    This is all hindsight of course. With the addition of Stealth, Saw: The Ride and The Swarm, things have increasingly changed at Thorpe and of course, so has Nemesis Inferno. As higher, faster and more attention grabbing rides have been added, Inferno has become more of a support roller coaster. When everything else goes to hell in a hand basket, Inferno is the old reliable. Always the ride with minimal queues, always the ride that eats through queues like it's going out of fashion and always the ride that delivers a smooth, intense experience. Never really pushing its customers too far but always delivering its promise of an enjoyable and satisfying ride. I know there are those that will disagree. A B&M inverter should be the absolute pinnacle of intensity, nothing should be considered more when riding this ride type. If that is the promise then Inferno doesn't deliver. Luckily, just up the M1 and left a bit is another roller coaster that does fulfil the necessary criteria.

    At Thorpe however is a ride built on the tail end of a coaster boom, one that is loved by a small but vocal minority. And for me personally, it holds some very special memories. It was my very first B&M and by default my first B&M inverter, it was the first ride that I really followed construction of and I know full well that it is my most ridden ride thanks to many Single rider sessions in 2004.
    More then most then, I can say that Inferno is an average ride at best. But even average is better then the majority of roller coasters out there. And that's good enough for me.
    Thanks for reading, Mark9

    *I made up a word just for this review. Now that is dedication for you
    **I know people will say X:/ No Way Out was a major roller coaster. it just isn't OKAY!
  10. Mark9

    2013 - A Retrospective

    By Mark9,

    2013 has not been the grandest years for theme parks in the country, more like a cheap table wine that you pick up for cheap at Tescos. From obvious budget cuts and rides standing but not operating for an entire year at Chessington too The Smiler trying to throw everything and the kitchen sink at passers by, it is clear that the Uk industry has stagnated somewhat in 2013.

    And yet, shockingly and surprisingly, despite not adding anything substantial, Thorpe Park has come out as the clear winner by a long shot. From much better reliability park wide, to improvement in effects up-keep and new events, the park has clearly embraced social media and openly interacts with guests more frequently. This all in turn with a slight shift in target audience, Thorpe has the potential to be the park of 2014 as well if it can keep the ball rolling with ideas that are fresh and innovative.

    So where did this begin? Ah, I know, March time. I had booked a whole week off of work so that I could visit Thorpe for its opening weekend, take a look at how The Smiler construction was going and have a go on Zufari whilst enjoying old family favourites such as Runaway Train, Dragon Falls and Vampire. It wasn't to be. A refurbishment list made itself apparent, a lot of these rides were not to be open due to the park not able to maintain rides for a quarter of a century and Zufari was postponed by a week. No matter. As temperatures continued to drop, three successive trips to Thorpe occurred, one for the Swarm media photo day with Thorpe Park Mania, one before a meet weekend and another on what was to be the coldest trip of the season. On all three days, somehow, Slammer worked continuously, we even had a ride in the snow which is pretty surreal, I'm sure not many could say they've done that. Despite the freezing temperatures, the only rides closed all day were Colossus and Saw. A Trip to Chessington could have given you a ride on Bubbleworks and Tomb Blaster if you were really lucky. Alton also impressed during March, the emptiest I had ever seen it. Surprising sights such as only two people on Air at 4 in the afternoon is very different to the usual sights.
    May
    New Coasters - 142. Wodan - Europa Park

    With the sun out, birds singing and all but one ride open at Chessington (for now), it was back with my theme park shoes and off on holiday. Instead of staying with the UK, it was back off the Europe for my favourite theme park so far. Europa Park is an utter joy to be had. Even though we spent three and a half days there it just isn't enough to fully embrace the joy of a theme park that is run professionally and efficiently with show after show, ride after ride and a park that has full pride in everything it provides for its guests. Ride highlights included Blue Fire being as good if not better then I remembered, the wonderful Euro-Mir and the very impressive, relentless Wodan. We stayed in the sublime Bell Rock resort and scored Eurovision one night, toured the hotel the other and had a delicious cocktail on our final night. Thursday night it was back off to England for a days rest and then onto the next trip, Denmark.

    New Coasters:- Dæmonen - Tivoli Gardens
    Odin Express - Tivoli Gardens
    The Caravan - Tivoli Gardens
    Rustcherbanan - Tivoli Gardens
    Vandorm - Bon Bon Land
    Vild Svinet - Bon Bon Land
    Hunderprutterutchebane - Bon Bon Land
    Tornado - Bakken
    Rustchebanan - Bakken
    Mine Train Ulven - Bakken
    Racing - Bakken
    Vilde Maus - Bakken
    Mairehønen - Bakken
    Piraten - Djurs Sommerland
    Skatteøen - Djurs Sommerland
    Karlo’s Taxi - Djurs Sommerland
    Thors Hammer - Djurs Sommerland
    Juvelen - Djurs Sommerland
    Jungle X-Plorer - Legoland Billund
    X-Treme Racers - Legoland Billund
    Dragen - Legoland Billund
    Timber Ride - Legoland Billund
    Lynet - Farup Sommerland
    Mine Expressen - Farup Sommerland
    Flagermusen - Farup Sommerland
    Pindsvinet - Farup Sommlernad
    Falken - Farup Sommerland


    On our arrival it was a sweltering 16 degrees (hot for Denmark) but throughout the week, the weather would fly up and down. It is a very odd climate indeed. We spent the first night celebrating Denmark's win of Eurovision and throughout the week we would hear that music blasting out of car windows. We even got to see the winning act perform live at Tivoli. The major highlights off the trip were the first Rustcherbanan at Tivoli Gardens, which is a truly wonderful attraction and deserves to be appreciated for its sheer beauty and smoothness, Piraten and Juvelen at Djurs Sommerland which were equal in the fun and thrill stakes, Polar XPlorer at Legoland Billund was a very fun ride, as was Lynet at Farup Sommerland. With the good comes the bad and Bakken was truly atrocious with the diabolical Tornado symbolising everything I think wrong with the modern day Intamin company. Not enough refining, too much trying to please a park on a sub-standard product. The Rustcherbanan at Bakken had also been seriously ruined by KumbaK with magnetic breaks destroying any element of momentum that the ride tries to build.
    I left Denmark feeling very sad, it is a wonderful country, if not for its coasters then for its feeling of freedom, liberty and forward thinking Danes.
    June
    New Coasters - 170: The Smiler - Alton Towers

    And after what felt like a life time of waiting, The Smiler finally got itself going and very swiftly, a trip was planned with my non coaster friend. The Smiler is a great ride. Ok, so it can't upstage Nemesis or Oblivion but I still maintain it is a great ride with a bit of a kick in it especially towards the end. You could say I've been lucky, every time I've visited, it has been open and whilst seeing break downs galore whenever I enter the queue, I've always been fortunate enough to ride. Even with it throwing bits off quite frequently. For my 25th birthday, it was off to Thorpe where I got my last ride on Slammer before its annual four month closure. It was a beautifully sunny day with minimal queues. And still it wasn't my best trip to Thorpe this season.. but that is coming. Shortly after my birthday, spent a weekend at Towers for some Smiler loving. The end of the month saw the Inferno ERT even for TPM members where we got to walk through some of the ride area and some lucky pups got to have a little walk up the lift hill.
    July
    This was a relatively quiet month with a solitary trip to Alton Towers where yet again a substantial ride count was halted by the troublesome Smiler eating up so much of the day.
    August
    Now this was the trip of the season. Thorpe hosting its summer late night events. I know some got rained on and the organisation is not as strong as it could be. But during my trip I can safely say I had the best Thorpe I've had for some time. The park was busy enough during the day but with the later hours, I got a chance to properly relax and appreciate my time there. With the joyous hot weather as well, it didn't feel like a theme park in the UK with rubbish weather and even worse opening hours. It felt like I was in sunny Florida or Italy with some great friends from TPM. I came away pretty blown away by how great the trip was, testament to how much Thorpe has grown and increased in confidence during the season.
    September
    New Coasters -
    Space Mountain: Mission 2 - Disneyland Parc
    Big Thunder Mountain Railroad - Disneyland Parc
    Indianna Jone et le Temple du Perile - Dienyland Parc
    Casey Jr - Disneyland Paris
    Crushs Coaster - Disneyland Paris
    Rock ‘N’ Rollercoaster - Disneyland Paris
    RC Racer - Disneyland Paris
    Tami Tami - PortAventura



    And so with the weather starting to deteriorate it was off to Disneyland Paris, a place I have never been before. I did enjoy it and found it far more relaxing and stress free then the pressure kitchen that is Disney World. It helped that the parks were very quiet with 5 minute queues on Space Mountain, Thunder Mountain and Tower of Terror being seen throughout the visit. Dreams was a real highlight, seriously great entertainment and needs to be seen by as many as possible. The final trip, two weeks later was PortAventura which unbeknown to me was the start of its Halloween events. Now, I really don't like Halloween events. I know they are extremely popular but I don't find them scary in the slightest despite the actors best efforts. For me, the important thing for the trip was to get my ride on Tami Tami and to fully enjoy Shambhala and Dragon Khan. Which I certainly did, getting more then my fill on both these coasters. Baco, lived up to its awful reputation, set last year but maintained fully in 2013. Is it worse then Tornado? They are both awful and nasty.

    My year was finished off with a Fright Night finish at Thorpe. I don't do mazes but with it being quiet during night, it was nice to get a few night rides on Inferno, Stealth and front row Colossus.
    ​And with that the year off theme parks is over. 2013 was not a great year for the UK admittedly. So much potential completely left untapped with Smiler not being as reliable as required and Chessington letting down every single guest that walked through its doors with its sheer incompetence. I used to be a major Chessington fan but frankly its no longer worth the effort. Full of low capacity rides that are either falling apart, closed or so low on staff that it takes five minutes to load a boat. Hence my lack of visit in 2013.

    Here's to a full on 2014 for everyone and thanks for reading (if you did).
  11. Mark9
    It was time for the Stars in their cars parade. Not great to be honest. Part of the problem here is that it's just generic cars and aren't that exciting to look at. It also blocks off the entrance/exit to the park so want to leave, nope you get stuck. Want to get on Tower whilst its quiet, no you have to wait for the Parade to pass. Not the greatest planning.


    Not long Remy, Not long...
    With the parade over and the two shows not starting for a while, we headed back to Toy Story playland and had a go on RC Racer. Luckily the queue was only 10 minutes long as the ride is so short it does push its luck. Not a bad effort by Disney, it's just a shame you have to queue in the shed area next to the station instead of the cool race track part of the queue line. The ride itself is comfy enough with enough speed to satisfy even the most hardened coaster fans.
    After that it was Slinky's piece of rubbish which is the most useless kids rides ever constructed. It's actually a little bit insulting.

    Shortly before we rode.
    Cinemagique and Animagique followed. Love them both with Animagique having the edge. Any attraction that has Donald in a tizz is a winner for me and I particularly liked the show.
    Our final stop was Tram Tour which felt as useless and convoluted as the Florida version. The main problem is both have been cut down from their original intent. Here, with Ratatouille construction the tour feels in two halves. A long jaunt over to the water canyon followed by a tedious return journey through a set of a film know one even remembers let alone heard of. We queued a good half an hour for it and it wasn't worth the wait. The queue was only that long due to only running two trams.

    With day at Studios over it was time for steak in Disney village before returning to Disney Parc for a trip on Dumbo and another showing off Dreams. Love that show.


  12. Mark9
    Day started with a 15 minute queue for breakfast. This was slightly chaotic with hundreds of people going for breakfast at the same time, a lot of people coming an hour early and not being turned away. Wouldn't happen at Towers
    From there it was on to Studios Park, our first stop Crush's Coaster. We didn't arrive dead on ten so when we got to Crush, the queue was already displayed at 60 minutes. We decided to bite the bullet and just go for it. This was the only ride where we saw a queue line monitor, a staff member regularly throwing out queue jumpers which was refreshing to see. Turns out, the queue for this isn't as bad as I first thought and its all down to Disney efficiency. Sure, this is a low throughput effort for Disney but even here the queue moves at a very steady pace. And its all down to the park running all twelve cars at once. As we watched we noticed cars are sent out every nine seconds. That is frankly astonishing to watch and throughput works out at roughly around 1200 an hour. So even for a low throughput affair, that is some impressive numbers from a Maurer. The ride itself is nice and quirky featuring some nice dark ride sections, a speedy lift hill and a reasonably good layout inside. I could argue that inside the shed, there's very little effects or theming but then again, its dark down below the water and the lack of things to look it increases the disorientation. This is far superior to Caligostro at Rainbow Magicland.



    Our next stop was Rock N Rollercoaster. Too say I'm not the biggest fan of the Florida version may be an exaggeration, here I find the ride just tiresome. I think the major problem is that for me, this just isn't a Disney type ride. Rip Ride Rockit at Universal Studios has issues but as a ride with a soundtrack it works fine. Here, Aerosmith just isn't a themed experience and I find the idea behind the ride so tedious. The theme here is... Aerosmith want to do something. I have no idea as unlike in Florida, the pre-show is very short and it seems to play continuously so you either walk in when its half way through or miss it completely. The station itself is similar to Florida except the cars are more pimped up and a tad silver. And as for the ride. I didn't notice how tedious the actual ride is in Florida because as the only upside down coaster at Disney World, it had a bit of difference to it. Here at Paris, which has Mission 2, a far superior version of what is the same ride type, Rock N Roller is just a little bit dire.
    Plain exteriors.
    Our next stop was Aarmageddon. Now I have a real problem with this type of attraction. If you told me that we were actually going into Space and we encounter problems then I'd probably come out loving it. But tell me I'm just an actor in a short scene being filmed for a film and I immediately switch off. It's exactly the same problem I have with similar rides in Florida. If anything, this is the only attraction that fits the bill of a studio park but I want to feel like I'm part of a narrative, not just being slotted in around loads of fire effects and smoke. Imagine if in the Hollywood Hotel you were told you weren't actually part of the narrative and just testing the ride system for the TV experience. It would be rubbish. Same applies to Armageddon so yes, probably my most hated experience in the day.
    Our next stop was Tower of Terror where we ended up queuing an hour. Crazy really, but it is the best ride in the entire resort so what the hey.


    After that we went for an English showing of Stitch Live where I was picked on by the character. I am Mark from the London and I am wanted for crimes against aliens. There we are, something new we learn everyday.
    I must have really bad luck as I was also picked on in the Laugh Floor in Florida.
  13. Mark9
    With the rain coming down it seemed like everyone rushed to the nearest food place. As we were at the back of Fantasyland we were stuck with Toads Hall, a tinyish place which could't cope with the amount of people coming in. People were arguing and fighting over tables and staff couldn't control who was next in wait for a table. We were lucky, a lovely French couple noticed I'd been waiting the longest and offered me the table, even telling off others who tried to take it from me. We had fish and chips which was about the only interesting thing the place sold. It was fine and we moved onto Pirates of the Caribbean which was now open.

    I 100% preferred this version to Florida and I think part of it is that Jack Sparrow from the films hasn't been shoehorned into the attraction. The Paris version is just lovely to ride, full of atmosphere, high throughput and well themed. Really like the ending with all the skeletons as well. It's only drawback is that it is hidden away at the very back of the park and doesn't get the attention it properly deserves.
    With the rain getting heavier we decided to take refuge and do some indoory things such as explore Sleeping Beauty's castle, the cave underneath which rather shamefully ruins what is hidden inside because its called Cave of the Dragon. *sighs*



    The rain was in heavy heavy mood so it was back to Discoveryland to try out Space Mountain again and ride Star Tours. I've done the Adventure continues at Florida so I was interested into how this version would be. Thankfully the queue was only five minutes long so we got on pretty much straight away. It's so early 90's I can't help love it. Sure its completely outclassed by its sequel but its still a decent enough ride.

    Next was Captain EO which was just as bad in Paris as it was in Florida. It may have been made by some very talented people but each one got it wrong here. Embarressing.

    Cake was had on Main Street and we next attempted to get on the Railroad. The queue advertised was 45 minutes and we weren't sure how this could be. Well when you are only running one train on a very long circuit and no one gets off at your station then it suddenly dawns on you. This will be a waste of the time. The bigger curiosity is that the other stations weren't open to board the train. You could get off at Frontierland for instance but no one would be able to get on. So were people just going round and round on the railroad.
    Instead we walked back to Fantasyland and did a few more attractions over there including the Carousel and Mad Tea Party which we never got the chance to ride in Florida. I can see why we skipped them.


    And with dawn quickly approaching we took a last ride of the day on Big Thunder Mountain (Two train operation, Florida this is not) and headed to Main Street for Dreams.

    Dreams is absolutely stunning. I wasn't going to waste time watching it through a camera lens or paying more attention taking photos then watching the artisty in front of me, I wanted to enjoy the show. And it is brilliant, featuring some of the greater Disney songs like Can't wait to be King and Never had a Friend like me. I also never knew how popular Merida from Brave is but everytime she came on the crowd cheered louder then the others. I was also pleased to see Dr Facillier from the Princess and the Frog feature so heavily, a very under-rated villian.
    The finale is of course an inspirational song (second star to the right), a load of fireworks and lots of flashing lights. My kind of show!
    Dreams is as good if not better then the Florida equivalents, not to be missed at any time on a Paris trip. And with that it was sleepy times, ready for the next day in Studio Park.
  14. Mark9
    Big Thunder is the quintessential family roller coaster. Mildly fast, full of variety and not too many large drops to scare kids. The general consensus is that Paris's version is the best of the four. While I can only compare to Florida, I'd go as far as agreeing with aspects of that opinion. The only real part where Paris falls down is its queue line. There seems to be various ways that the ride is run and none of them seem that great. On the first day for example, fastpass was available but there was no one batching into the main queue and unlike Florida, the fastpass queue didn't get their own side of the station. So what you had was fastpassers having to split into the queueline whenever a gap appeared. The second damaging thing was that at some point in the queue, it splits into two sides. If you decide to queue on the right you get whacked by a longer queue length, fastpass people attempting to join and that is also the side where disabled guests get on. If you opt for the left hand side you almost walk straight into the station, undeterred by distractions. It's the most bizarre operations and despite it being a very high capacity rollercoaster, has so much faff going on. Florida doesn't have any of these problems so it's almost like Paris decided to try something different and it doesn't quite work.


    The ride itself is similar to Floridas version with two key differences. The first is a fantastic start to the ride with the train dipping into an underground tunnel and gathering a lot of speed before it engages with the first lift hill. It's great to see that with thirty years of running, the Big Thunder lift hills still have the loudest lift chains out there. I wouldn't be surprised if kids were more scared of the noise then the ride. What happens for the majority of the rest of the ride is the same as Florida, California and Tokyo so I won't bore by describing the ride in detail.. except the ending. I was always a bit meh about Floridas dull ending through some rocks and skeletons. Paris is far superior with the train lurching violently to the left, into a cave and descending under the river, gathering so much speed like it really is out of control. I'd bet that it isn't as steep as it feels and yet works very well. The trains pulls up out of the tunnel into the break run and everyone is a bit blown away by that ending. Great finale and really makes the Big Thunder island concept work very well.


    We decided to have another go, what with it being a ten minute queue and chose the left hand side of the queue line. It was then off to face one of my greatest terrors; Indianna Jones!
    I'm not sure what the point of this ride is. It doesn't fulfil the quota of upside down rides as there is already Space Mountain and there's already a ride themed around a mine car at Big Thunder. I can only think that this was a desperate attempt at another ride in the park for adults. Whatever the reason, I know it has a poor reputation for being rough, boring and unnecessary but I kind of liked it. Sure it can't do straight lines or hills without whacking your head on a restraint but as a ride it was perfectly acceptable. It had a five minute queue the majority of the time so I don't think it entirely fits into the park in anyway. If Disney got rid and went for a ride like the version at California, I wouldn't say no.

    Our next stop was Pirates of the Caribbean but was for some reason unavailable. We had the same problem at Florida on our first trip so had no worries that it wouldn't open at some point. We decided on doing some Fantasyland rides such as Pinocchio and Snow White which we queued 10 minutes a piece for. I like this rides because they aren't flashy and "look at me" like some dark rides and they do their job of telling their respective stories adequately. Sure they won't win Gold Ticket awards but for high throughput, reliable attractions they work well.


    Next stop was the notorious it's a Small World. I liked it. I don't know why I like the idea behind the ride when everyone else despises it with a passion, but it just works for me. It looks like its had a clean up too as the majority of animatronics were working, it looked tidy with no dust anywhere and things looked repainted. For a high capacity boat ride, it ticks all the boxes.. even if it never seems to be able to get a queue.



    Finally with the rain now fully upon us, we found a nice hidden away area with one of my personal favourites from the trip, Casey Junior. I adored this ride and I can't figure it out why. It just seems so novel and under-stated

  15. Mark9
    Having been given a breakfast slot for 9:45, we decided to skip a bit of continental and headed into the park around 9:00 instead. Seeing a main street so empty is an experience you'll rarely get so we took the opportunity to get some photos and get some coffee from one of the various outlets along Main Street.

    I'll never get tired of the Castle/Main Street view.

    LOOK AT THE THEME!
    We also approve of buying food and getting tickets for free coffee later in the day.
    One thing I really noticed about the parks here is how much more relaxed you can be. With Florida you get caught in a whirlwind of rushing about from ride to ride, reservation at restaurant to show or parade and never take proper time to appreciate where you are. Throughout our time in Paris, we did a lot of sitting around, relaxing and soaking in the atmosphere. Playing a part in that is that there is less to do here then in Florida but I can only put that as a benefit to Paris.
    Our first stop during Magic Hours was Space Mountain: Mission 2. From outside, it is a frankly stunning piece of design, that giant cannon is a piece of theming genius and fits in perfectly with the rest of Discoveryland. I'm rather fond of this area as it is. I can understand why they diverted away from Tomorrowland as that area dates faster then they can build/update it.
    As for Space Mountain. I do like the ride on a thematic level. The idea of being launched into space via a giant cannon is based on Jules Verne's novel 'From the Earth to the Moon' and I love it. I just wish the theming worked such as the recoil of the cannon or the misters as you are blasted into the building. The ride itself is rather atypical of Vekoma. Enjoyable but you really struggle to find a position in which you don't bang your head on the side of the stupid restraints. That being said it is very well paced inside, the ride keeping its speed up to the last moment. It does feel a bit like you are descending into a vortex as the trains spirals around the building, every now and then taking in an inversion surprisingly.
    We rode several times through the trip and it was either outstanding, unbearable or average. So I find it hard to really rate it.
    Our next ride was Buzz Lightyears Laser Blast, A ride I despised in Florida but here it was actually a decent ride. The props all seemed to make sense and weren't all cardboard cut outs with targets on them. I even liked the finale which I won't spoil here. I don't understand the points system but then again, it is only a throw away ride.

    With no interest in Orbitron or Autopia we decided to head back to the central hub and wait for the rest of the park to open. More views of the wonderful Sleeping Beauty castle awaited us.



    With 10 o clock upon us it was time to venture into Frontierland. We grabbed a fastpass for Big Thunder Mountain whilst everyone else descended into its main queueline. We instead thought we'd try out Phantom Manor. It's American equivalent, Haunted Mansion, is one of my favourite dark rides and I'd heard many great things about the Paris version. I wasn't disappointed as such. The subtlety of the storytelling (ie, there was no narration) meant that we had to really pay attention to the scenes throughout. Something to do with a bride whose family dies (or she murdered them) and so she gets buried as the ride descends from amazingly themed Mansion to an odd underground Western film. Very odd. The shoe-horning of Phantom Manor into Frontierland didn't work for me although there is no way the attraction itself could fit into the other three lands of the park. A triumph though and just shows that when it comes to dark rides, Disney are (mainly) on top.

    Our next stop was the Molly Brown boat ride around Big Thunder Mountain. We never found the time to do this in Florida so it was a welcome find to get on it and just relax for twenty minutes. It's a shame that aside from Big Thunder Mountain there is nothing to really look at. I hear that some kind of fountain show used to occur at the end but no longer works.


    Next time will focus on Big Thunder Mountain, Fantasyland and yet again we get to Pirates of the Caribbean to find it broken.
  16. Mark9
    Qui a besoin du monde, quand tout ce que vous avez besoin est une terre
    When choosing the trips for 2013 there was two that were outright yes's and two that came about quite by chance. Disneyland Paris was not an all and all winner, in fact Chris and I were putting off Disney until our California trip next May. However with Disney extending their 20th Anniversary celebrations and with Chris feeling a little Disney craving, we decided to go for Paris even with no Ratatouille. After a speedy 2 and a half hours of Eurostar fun we arrived at the resort. The first thing that hit me is how immediate Paris is compared to Florida. I think inevitably, Florida may crop up again and again as it my theme park benchmark and for me holds a lot of loved memories.


    Whereas with Florida, a long journey from the airport gets you just within the gates of the World, here you stumble out the station into the Downtown area. I somehow missed the tower despite the fact it was my most eagerly anticipated ride. We made our way to our hotel, Sequoia Lodge, a hotel themed around the Wildnerness. Bambi seemed the most prominent character

    Checking in complete and with a bit of Mark9 persuasion, Chris relcutantly said we could have a go on Tower of Terror and also the Army Man parachute thing. The first because it's my favourite ride ever and the second ride was because the next day it was to be closed the rest of our holiday for refurbishment. Our first stop however was the Early of Sandwich which is better then the other fast food offering at the resort.

    TASTY.

    Aww.
    When walking into Disney Studio Park the first thing that really struck is how it is pretty much Hollywood Studios but on a smaller budget and much smaller. The Tower immediately dominates the entire park, hell it can even be seen from Big Thunder Mountain and the Alice in Wonderland maze. The other thing that hit us what the park was busy. We checked out the queue boards and 35 minutes for Rock 'N Rollercoaster, 60 minutes for Army Man Parachute ride and finally a cool 80 minute wait for the Tower of Terror (Which was only running two out of three lift shafts)
    mmmm 80.
    After a bit of wondering checking out just how small the place truly is, we settled for Army Man parachute ride, considering it would be our only chance to ride it. The first thing I have to say is that the queue really was 60 minutes so it was accurate at least. The second thing is that the queue line really was too wide allowing Spanish families to queue jump at will. You may think I'm generalising but the majority of the time it is Spanish groups who create problems at theme parks and after all, I have experienced PortAventura where queuing isn't mandatory.


    The ride itself is okay but not worth an hour waiting time.
    We had a wonder around Toy Story Playland including seeing Rex, leaving Toy Story Land to see Ratatouille construction and then re-entered Toy Story Land to leave for Tower of Terror.



    The Tower. Ey Ey Ey. It is my favourite ride bar none and is truly exceptional. All of the Tower staff need to be paid more for their efforts for example. They don't just work on a ride, they act the part of creepy bell-hops, grinning oddly at guests or deliberately running through the lift doors in utter panic scaring guests silly with their screaming. They help to make each ride that little bit different. The ride itself, well I was reading through a few other trip reports and saw a lot prefer this tower to the Florida one. Both have so much merit but I actually ended up preferring the Florida one. Sometimes the waiting around for a lift in Paris got a bit tedious, what with this tower using two different levels of loading. The actual ride experience is probably just that little bit better then Florida however but ultimately Florida's to me feels more efficient and looks far more interesting then Paris's more blockier, blander look.



    I still love both though and could photo it all day.
    And with our rides ridden, we decided to go back to the hotel and get myself a hair cut before heading to Annettes for some food. Themed around an American diner, this wasn't bad food and I liked how some of the staff went about on roller-skates.


    Bed time, ready for a full on day at Disneyland Parc.
  17. Mark9
    Tornado at Bakken is one of the worst rollercoasters I have ever had the misfortune of riding. It is so atrociously bad that it made me wonder what 25 things are better then it. Here is what I came up with and I hope you enjoy reading.
    1. Being kicked in the testicles
    2. Going to the Dentist
    3. Riding Furius Baco none stop for an hour
    4. Crashing your car into a wall
    5. Being mugged
    6. Having to endure a queueline at PortAventura
    7. Driving in Italy
    8. Being sick after a heavy night out drinking
    9. Getting the Victoria line during rush hour
    10. Sitting next to someone with body odour on a packed out London bus
    11. Watching Holby City
    12. Enduring homophobic abuse
    13. Going all the way to Towers and finding out the Smiler is closed
    14. Reading Theme Park Review
    15. Being insulted by Robb Alvey
    16. Shopping at Asda
    17. Shopping at Primark
    18. Eating Brocolli
    19. Eating Brussel Sprouts
    20. Flying with Ryanair
    21. Being stuck in a lift with someone who has just farted
    22. Queuing for Colossus on one train operation
    23. Living next to very loud neighbours
    24. Riding Saw. At all.
    25. Visiting Chessington during the 2013 season
  18. Mark9

    The 2013 Project

    By Mark9,

    There is no doubt that in terms of theming, attendance and atmosphere, Disney rules the roost in every corner of the world. From the magnificence of Cars Land, the beauty of Expedition Everest and the sheer escapism of Tokyo Disney Sea, it's clear that Disney is the king.
    But do you know what. Travel into Europe and we hold our very own treasure, one that has riches all of its own. From the throughput behemoth that is Europa Park, to the park with two of the best steel rollercoasters in the world at Miribilandia. We've got parks with the strangest names like Plopsaland and Tripsdrill, to parks that are so beautiful that despite the lack of rides are unmatched in Europe.
    That is why for 2013, try and edge away from the Merlin machine. We get so caught up in low throughput attractions, fastrack dominating our queue lines, the loss of magic, budget cuts and short, reduced hours that we start to forget what going to theme parks is all about. That first time visit where around every corner is an attraction you never knew existed. Where discovering new rides and new experiences is the name of the game, where getting on as many rides as you can is not what dominates your day.
    Even if isn't globe trotting to Bobbejaanland and instead popping to Oakwood, Blackpool, Flamingoland or even Lightwater Valley, making the attempt to visit a brand new park is so much more enriching and fulfilling then just going to Thorpe Park, Chessington and Alton Towers again.
    Trust me when I say, it is worth any cost, any time commited towards the trip.
  19. Mark9
    In 2012, Thorpe Park is a maelstrom. It is a giant, it is a behemoth it is, put it simply a hit.
    Seated within its small grounds lies coaster after coaster and some of the most well known flat rides around. Top scans, Afterburners, giant swings, drop towers, sky swats. It even has some pretty nifty water rides in Loggers Leap and Tidal Wave. The Swarm surely secures Thorpe Park at the very top of the theme park tree.
    And yet, a part of me always harkens back to the days where Colossus and Nemesis Inferno ruled the roost, where the top five rides were of real variety, where you could rest away at Thorpe Farm or relax in Sunken Gardens. There are some that must think I'm mad, "Surely Mark, you're into top flight thrills, not boring, meandering train rides to a dull, down trodden farm, a past echo, an area that doesn't deserve its place in a technological forest."
    Sir you couldn't be more wrong and here is why.
    A theme park is more then just the rides that it contains. Sure you can throw ride upon ride upon ride at a place and charge to the hilt. But, particularly in Thorpe Parks case everything becomes samey. It says it all when Stealth, the parks only major roller coaster without inversions, is about the only ride that breaks the mould at Thorpe. The majority of rides at Thorpe spin you in some direction or invert you repeatedly. Many rides do both. Rides like Mr Monkeys Banana Ride and Depth Charge are becoming more scarce in a park that increasingly tries to intimidate you silly.
    Be it beyond me to criticise Thorpe Park and the way it sells its park. I do not have a degree in market research or target audiences and I will never pretend that I do. But I do personally think Thorpe have a problem. There is really, very little entry level rides left at the place and they are the rides that are increasingly being targeted for removal. It's questionable how long Depth Charge or Mr Monkeys or Chief Rangers Carousel have left before they are replaced by another fast, inverting, spinning flat ride. And part of me thinks this is sad. I never ride them and judging by Thorpe blindly ignoring them, I bet very few people still do.
    And this is why my favourite Thorpe Park era was 2003. A varirty of rides of all shapes and sizes, areas where you can rest, a time where every staff member genuinely cared about customer services and the appearance of the attractions and a time where there was real optimism about the direction of the park. Remember these were the days that Samurai still span in Mystic East, Eclipse was brand new and we had only just heard rumours about a possible Xcelerator clone coming to Thorpe Park.
    Exciting days indeed.
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