Benin

Oh lol...Hello BOGOFs...Actually, would be interesting to see how many guests actually pay full price... But still... It's over the 40 quid mark now, surely eventually people will start saying, "it's too expensive to go"...

Yes...Merlin putting investment into something for a quick return? NEVER!

Did not know it closed, but then again, I don't care... You do around the exit of the gift shop as the ticket office is in the same place... Literally is between Aquarium and McDonalds in County Hall...

It's right in County Hall, seeing the people go to Starbucks on their break is amusing...But no idea if it's any good... Never been in... Plus, this is not the same as Pasaje del Terror, though there is now one at Trocadero, which is technically the NEWEST horror maze attraction in London (as it opened last year)...

Hahahahahahahaha...This video says very differently...

Thirteen Live NOT returning? Who has said this and where do I find them so they can be strangled?Honestly, it worked incredibly well, unless it's some crap about having to pay the actors too much... They improved the queue-line no question... I'd rather Thirteen have actors than Hex... Unless they actually attempt to do a story with Hex (what I heard from last time they did it, actors running around does no constitute a well done attraction)...And Skelvin (compared to 2009 Duel Live) was also dire... Towers took one step forward and two back last year I felt in the case of on park stuff...

It's an au natural splash...The designers made the boat's shape in such a way to create the splash of that size, and it's similar for other rides of it's type, though Tidal Wave is probs one of the bigger splashes I've seen on these ride types...

Blackpool has a Halloween event? First I've heard of it tbh...I think it's all dependant on what you want from a Halloween event, as each park actually does a fair attempt at their own version of it...Chessie's has the best overall Halloween theming... They really do attempt to transform the park in comparison to Thorpe and Towers, which do barely anything to actually theme the rides... In fact, the only things that are really themed to Halloween are their mazes... But on the other hand, Chessie's attractions for Halloween aren't really amazing... Hocus Pocus Hall last year was it's usual Halloween self (which is decent), but Black Forest Haunt was dire... I hear they are interested in returning the shipping container maze this year after Vamp's birthday... Which means another attraction which is a good thing...Towers I've been the last two years and as mentioned earlier, there's minimal extra theming added... There was some more last year but not a lot... Thirteen was vastly improved with the night-time actors, but Duel Live last year was appaulling compared to the awesome 2009 version...Now because mazes aren't my thing, I don't do them, so I discount them from this... But, Nemesis in the dark is most definitely worth everything...Thorpe again is very similar to Towers, lots of mazes, very busy, minimal extra theming (last time I went there was... NONE)... So to me it's about on the same scale as Towers' event... And hence only worth it for the rides in the dark... Or at least the rides at Thorpe I like...Though in the end, last time I went to Fright Nights I had my worst ever trip to Thorpe, so that's kinda against it...So in the end, just for sheer effort at actually trying to transform the park (and not just by adding Midnight Syndicate everywhere), the winner for me, is Chessie...

Rammie usually sends people around twice (unless there's a massive queue, which is rare)...It's all operator dependant as well, since they choose what setting it goes onto, and the few times I platformed it they always swapped after the first 'slow' setting...Though I dunno why they don't just put it on a 'major' setting and give everyone one go on that... I really don't understand Chessie's way of operating rides sometimes...

Depends WHICH Bubbleworks you mean...If you mean the current version, then no sane enthusiast 'raves' about it... It's horrible...If you mean the old version, then anti-climatic? Usually when people say good things about Bubbleworks, it's in relation to the original Prof Burps version, not the sponsored turd that exists now...

Can someone get rid of that stupid image amount restrictions please... It's bloody annoying when you have to triple post one section of your trip report...

Brilliant way of doing the water and making it see-through for the extra details at the bottom... TROLLLLLLLLL!I highly recommend this place to anyone visiting... It’s very awesome even if you have no interest in model railways and the like... It’s just full of win and deserves more recognition...Anyways, that finished, we elected for lunch, and due to knowing about the so called Roller-coaster restaurant in the city (sort of), we had planned a route there and headed back to the Hauptbahnhof and got the S Bahn number 31 to Harburg, and a short walk later we found it... Now notice something about this? It was open, lights on, music on, but no staff or customers... Staff saw us milling about inside but made no attempt to talk to us or indeed inform us of what to do... After a while we left rather disappointed by this lack of good form I expect from the Germans and it was really a wasted journey in the end... Right shame...So we headed back to Hamburg proper as we needed to catch our train towards Soltau for the final part of the holiday, Heide Park... And we got our MetroNOM (no joke) train over to Buchholz (Nordheide) for our connecting train to Soltau... On our way from Hamburg we realised that we had a 3 minute connection time between the trains, and our NOM arrived at platform 1, whilst the next train left from platform 11...This naturally, caused worry, until we reached Buchholz and we saw that, for some reason, 1 and 11 were right next door to each other... Confusion aside, we still ran to get on the train and enjoy the nice long sedate journey over to Soltau... Upon arrival, we waited for a taxi (as Heide is rather far away from the station, there is a bus but that is rather infrequent in non-peak hours), and eventually we arrived at the Hotel Port Royal...Gonna end this part of the report here and keep all Heide together, which will include a review of the hotel and of course, Krake... Woo...

All aboard the party boat! There were trains going around, and can go from the bottom of the Switzerland area alllllll the way through to the Scandinavian bit right on the opposite end... But they are definitely not the main draw of this place... FUNFAIR!!! And yes, with added working credit! Just to show how far down this place went... A fair few of the rides moved as well... They have gone all international as well, with a massive American area... Of course, they had to have a recreation of Hamburg as well... Watching this bloke fix sommat was just as impressive, as he was attempting to not knock anything over... Another cred, though it is a mixture of Manhattan Express and Speed in Vegas... Urgh... Hell yeah Pixar! Oh yeah, they also have space shuttle launches here... I love this short... So much...

Day 3 – Hamburg Part 2So after our night in the business style Travelodge, we checked out, left our bags and then descended upon the city once again... This was across the road from the hotel, a picture was indeed required... Good old fashioned translations going awry...Regardless of such buildings, it was time to get back on the U-Bahn... After the quick train journey to Baumwall (only a stop away from our journey yesterday), we sauntered through the construction site towards our destination, Miniatur Wunderland... Ah... Something’s wrong here... Yep, Merlin’s worldwide grasp is particularly strong in Germany, whilst we didn’t go in the Dungeons, it shared a few similarities to London, mainly with Labyrinth, the Judge, Traitor and Extremis... However some of the scenes interested me, such as the Haunted Library and some pirate’s execution... They do English tours as well which is quite a good idea, though I would love to do the tour in German cos of the interest in how amazing the accent would sound...Anyways, off to the Wunderland, which has a relatively steep looking price (for students it’s 9 euros) but when we went into the attraction (after having to put bags in a locker, again, very good idea) and saw this, we realised what we were paying for... Yep, this is one serious model railway... It goes through 2 floors, and several rooms with all different areas and with further plans to expand even MORE in the future... This is one serious piece of kit... With lots of interactive pieces as well to see, it was an absolute surprise and very worth the entrance fee... Scenes like the Flugtag reminded me very much of a Lego Miniland... Lots of little details and jokes dotted about to try and spot... Fully working concert... With camera flashes from the audience... Lots of PLCs... Each area had its own day/night alternation, and worked very well... This was their newest area, the working airport... Yes, the plane is coming into land whilst the other one is waiting... This was one bloody impressive area and I have no idea how they did it all... The sheer scale of this was just amazing...

Yeah, if one thing Dungeons taught me today was how surprisingly long it actually is... At least an hour long and actually worth the time spent...Plus, first time a staff member has picked up on my pass still being gold instead of blue... Top marks to you sir

Oh yes, damn those pesky commoners, being all... common and getting in the way of my suit as I meander around the park with my top hat and cane... Tally Ho!

Merlin making a brilliant decision by adding an attraction to somewhere else which will see a heavy amount of income in the Summer due to the Olympics?Great business decision...And people probs holiday regularly in Weymouth... It'll probs make some money...

Double post but hey, I have a review here...So I popped to the Dungeons with John (peep) so we could investigate the new ride and see what Neil said was true... But not before I got picked for the torture sequence earlier on which provided much merriment, even if the girl refused to hear my retorts :DThere's two major differences in the first bit before Vengeance compared to the last time I went a few years, and that's the new positioning of Fire of London, which is very jarring and random and doesn't really do much... A bit poor considering how major the thing USED to be... The other is the new style surgery room, which is a lot more intimate and works much better, although not when the actor fails to close the curtain correctly at the finale :lol:Oh wells, Vengeance, which happens straight after old Sweeney Todd and involves just a small corridor with a TV saying a few bits about Berkeley Place, which is something I am not personally aware of in the long run, but still, sounds like a decent enough idea for an attraction in the Dungeons, but more information on the house rather than snippet based sentences (in varying languages) would have worked better...We get batched into the room and any bags and loose items are stowed in some boxes to the left as you enter, before you board the surprisingly comfy seats and everyone pulls down their bar (really, no automated stuff? Dungeons are poor on this lazy buggers)... We don the cardboard advertisement glasses, remove our guns and the ride begins...Now, I'll start with the postives, the spinning was a hilarious addition... Actually rather forceful and the noise it made wasn't toooooo bad as people seem to make out, too busy laughing about the force tbh... The animation was iffy but at least the extra effects worked well on everyone, and the 3-D wasn't bad either... But the guns are completely pointless... They don't do anything, there's no scoreboard, why they exist? I know not... This attraction would work perfectly without the guns and it seems that it was atypical Merlin thinking that they needed a World's First to attract new guests to the attraction... I don't mind such things when they make sense or work well, but the guns are just pointless... Still, I thought it was fun... It's not terrible but it's not amazing either... A solid 6/10 but needs more story behind it (like the other rides have) and needs to give reason for the guns... After that, the new Jack the Ripper is rather entertaining now (even if the pub scene was apparently there when I last went, I forget it personally, maybe due to the awe of the FIRE), though after the second room I was worried that it would be rather anti-climatic... But it wasn't...Then Bloody Mary involved John being the heretic (I blame him not liking Lord of the Rings personally), and hence being burnt at the stake... Again a new section to me and really amusing indeed... Though I don't know why they have barely changed the old Fire of London area... It makes no sense and just atm seems to filler between Mary and Extremis... Shame...I love Extremis, though toooooo much airtime due to a fatty in our row... Such the opposite to Scream at Heide which made me laugh... And the new pre-queue area works well... Overall, a very enjoyable tour of the Dungeons... I should go more often really... The actors were rather good (as well as the ride staff on Traitor), and I now have another Bear to add to my ever-growing collection (taking me up to 6 now)...

My favourite announcement is South-West trains beggar related one...So much win...

Needs MOAR pics...From what we can see so far, typical high standard expected from Phantasialand though... Why can't we have nice things?

Dear jobs I apply to,It would be nice if you actually did as you were meant to an send me an e-mail reply to me stating whether or not I have said job or not, rather than me have to chase your HR up and ask... Surely you're not that useless?Regards,Benin

^Whilst a ball coaster would fit, I would rather Thorpe build something with some actual throughput instead...

Day 2 – HamburgSo after a very nice day at Hansa Park, it was time to pack up and head for the city of Hamburg itself, with a quick plan of what we were going to do, we set off back to the station and said farewell to Sierksdorf...When we returned to Hamburg, we were unsure if we could dump our bags at the hotel (as it was one designed primarily for business people in mind), so we used the MASSIVE lockers located within the train station for 5 euros for the rest of the day... Rather decent pricing considering we fit two suitcases into one locker...One sorted, we headed to the U-Bahn and attempted to work out what train ticket we needed, as they seem to go more by zones rather than destination... Rather than risk it, we took the middle ground although we were only on for about 4 stops, better safe than sorry...We arrived at Rödingsmarkt and headed towards our first landmark, the St. Michaelis Church...It seems to not be a good idea to be a church in Hamburg we later discovered, but this is the most famous of them all, and we gave it a jolly good bombing back in the war what-what... Hence why the tower is blackened (and indeed, this seemed to be a trend throughout the city)... Not being much into the religion times (and the church not being Catholic) we continued our walk towards the Hamburg History Museum... We managed to get student discount to go in, resulting in only 10 euros for the two of us, which made me happy as that meant I wasn’t spending so much, and after we dumped off our bags in a locker (no other option but at least these repaid you your euro) we delved deeper into the museum... It was about this point that two things happened, firstly, two security guards made some conversation with me about not having flash photos (which, as most of my pics prove, I didn’t, dam ISO), which was rather confusing and tbh flustering... Don’t like security needlessly bickering at me in another language, let alone my own... Then I felt really sick, not sure if it was the fact that the museum was boiling or stuffy or what, but I felt like I was going to heave... Brilliant... However, we soldiered on up to the 3rd floor to investigate something that the Germans are also very famous for, a model railway... They only demonstrate it a few times each day, presumably to save energy as these things probably drain electricity like there’s no tomorrow, but regardless, it was still a rather impressive bit of kit... Least we thought so that day... After a while, we left and quickly went through some other parts of the museum since I was still feeling like crap... We went towards the St. Pauli station (which is the relatively famous red light district of the city, so typically European in the fact they promote it as much as ‘normal’ attractions), ended up helping some other tourist with the machines, before retrieving our luggage back at the Hauptbahnhof and retiring to the hotel and watching English Sky Cinema... Huzzah!Next time, more Hamburg...

This...January Jones and Jennifer Lawrence

Council estates normally...I can see it similar to the Child-Catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang...But, at the end of the day...