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I did 6 hours of driving today to get back on Stealth. (3 hours each way and going around the theme park). She really did well. I managed to get 8 rides on her whilst doing the other coasters. No fast track. Really so chuffed with engineering 😀. Great job Thorpe 😀 Just about managed it all in a day. Knackered myself but worth it. It's always a massive gamble with the cost of fuel and getting up at 4am to be home for 9pm.

If anyone’s interested, I have a few throughput timings and insights from my Thorpe visit last Monday: Colossus (Theoretical: 1,300pph on 2 trains) - 786pph (2 trains, average of 4, 13th April 2026) Hyperia (Theoretical: 1,050pph on 2 trains) - 770pph (2 trains, average of 4, 13th April 2026), 763pph (2 trains, average of 10, 13th April 2026) Nemesis Inferno (Theoretical: 1,150pph on 2 trains) - 1,023pph (2 trains, average of 6, 13th April 2026) Saw: The Ride (Theoretical: 1,000pph on 8 cars) - 854pph (unknown number of cars, average of 8, 13th April 2026) Stealth (Theoretical: 1,000pph on 2 trains) - 827pph (2 trains, average of 9, 13th April 2026), 860pph (2 trains, average of 6, 13th April 2026) The Swarm (Theoretical: 1,100pph on 2 trains) - 946pph (2 trains, average of 10, 13th April 2026), 1,022pph (2 trains, average of 5, 13th April 2026) Overall, then, I would have said ops were pretty good, but perhaps not as high-end as I have seen in a couple of cases. Colossus was doing pretty well in my brief snapshot by that ride’s standards, and Saw was smashing it! Inferno and Hyperia were also doing well. Some others were still good, but perhaps not as high as I have seen. For example, Stealth, consistently attaining slightly below 90s between dispatches, seemed somewhat slower than on my last visit back in September, where the staff were pumping out trains at a rate of knots and attaining nearly 1,000pph. Swarm also seemed slightly less consistent. That is me being persnickety, though; operations were generally good, and ride availability was also strong throughout the day! One thing I did notice is that Inferno was batching at the station entrance, which I found a bit odd… I wonder why they’ve changed this for 2026?

I was there Tuesday, and yes, the forecast for Wednesday was correct with heavy showers. I know the TP rail station bus is always busy but not been on it; being an old fogey, I can use my bus pass on the service buses. With a really low attendance, there is much more chance of banter between people on and around the rides, it's good. And for us nuts, it's certainly a great chance to meet like-minded types.

An absolutely crazy day TP has been closed on some recent Wednesdays, but I noticed it was available today and with the weather looking the better option, I went. A staff member who knows me told me that there were maybe only a couple of thousand people attending. oddly enough, I wanted to ride Stealth, and as there were hardly any guests on the ride or platforms, the gate was kept open so that people could re-ride, and that continued to beyond the lunch hour, with so many guests telling me that every ride was walk-on. During the time, some people wlo lived within a few miles had also then attended due to seeing online the short queues. As much as it pained me, I left Stealth and had two walk-on rides each on Nemesis Inferno, Hyperia, Saw, Colossus and Swarm before dragging myself back to Stealth, where the re-ride gate was open and announcements of "re-ride just get on", several were running to get on again, and there were loads of conversations between people and staff, many discussing their crazy ride totals for the day. There really were few guests and no waiting for rides one wanted. Staff were really upbeat and helpful. It really was a crazy day..

Stealth is back open today!

She's had a few test runs today. Looking quite promising. The launch bunker doors were open the other day. Perhaps they've done a cable change too.

Though a different situation to last year (where Stealth effectively opened weeks into the season), it must be a concern for the park that for the second year running they've had early-season issues with Stealth. The issues with hydraulic launches are well documented now. And one as powerful as Stealth will add to that complexity. At the same time, Thorpe are well-versed in dealing with complex, unique and temperamental rides (for better or worse). So hopefully they're not thinking of giving it up yet. But equally, from a purely business perspective, if this keeps happening, one has to expect they'll at least consider changes to it.

12th May 2026: Thorpe Park My period between jobs is rolling on, so with me having secured a permanent role, I thought; why not use the Merlin pass once again and go for a midweek Thorpe Park visit? I know I was only in Thorpe a month or so ago, but I made the spur-of-the-moment trip decision after noticing the quiet crowds last week and I like Thorpe. Sue me! I left home at about 6:30 this morning, arriving at Bristol Parkway just after 7am to take a 7:29 train to Staines, with a change in Reading. As a fun aside, I noticed the head of my directorate from my previous job waiting on the platform, but based on his suit and tie, I’d hazard a guess that he wasn’t heading to Thorpe Park! I arrived in Staines within just under 2 hours, and with all running to time, an Uber to the park and a non-existent security queue got me through the gates at just before 9:45, putting me in good stead for my first ride at opening time: Upon getting in, I repeated my usual Thorpe Park strategy and started with… Colossus While it looks like everyone heads in this direction at park opening time on paper, they’re all heading to Hyperia in reality, so I still stand by Colossus as a strong starting point in the morning. Today, I walked onto row 2 of the very first train of the day; the strategy hasn’t failed me yet! So, how was Colossus? Well, it’s never an absolute favourite of mine due to those extremely uncomfortable trains, but I have to say that it was running quite well this morning; the first half was smooth and had great speed and forces, and even the second half, while not a favourite of mine, seemed more enjoyable than usual! All in all, then, I’m considering that a win as far as Colossus is concerned; it was running well, and it was a good way to start the day: After I got off Colossus, I pondered my usual strategy of heading for a single rider ride on Saw, but the ride was still closed, so I instead decided to head for… Hyperia Hyperia was on an advertised 20 minute queue, but as my last visit showed me that the single rider queue is often quiet first thing, I decided to take a gamble on using that. And this proved a prudent gamble, as I waited a mere 5 minutes to be batched onto row 3. I’ve never seen Hyperia’s single rider queue that quiet before! But how was it? Well, Hyperia has always been a favourite of mine, and today was no exception; the ride was stunning! I’m going to come out with a strong sentiment and say that with more rides, I increasingly think that first drop might possibly be my favourite in the world; it’s a complete riot wherever you sit, with phenomenal sustained ejector that flings you way out of your seat and holds you there and the twist adding a really interesting additional dimension of forces compared to a regular straight drop! As much as I’m an advocate of good, straight airtime on rides over being unconventional for the sake of it, I would also have to say that that outerbank is truly insane and probably the most convincing example of non-traditional weightlessness I’ve ridden! The junior Immelmann and stall are great too… and to be honest, all of it’s pretty phenomenal! The ride is also incredibly smooth, comfortable and rerideable (I swear it feels smoother than it did in 2024, if anything), and when combined with the awesome airtime and speed, that makes it a true winner in my book! All in all, then, I was thrilled to get back on Hyperia; it’s easily my favourite coaster in the UK, and right up there in my top 5 overall, which is no mean feat when I’ve done nearly 150 coasters: After I got off Hyperia, I decided to take advantage of the very short single rider queue and partake in not one, but two back-to-back rerides after that. I had a row 2 followed by a back row, and while both were sublime, I think getting on the back counteracted a comment I made in my last Thorpe trip report. Last time, I thought Hyperia might well be a coaster best ridden in the front half of the train after experiencing the front half for the first time… but having reridden the back, there’s no doubt in my mind that it’s a back row coaster for me, as much as it’s sublime in every row. The back row experience of that first drop alone settles it for me; as much as it hits hard in any row, the back is just narrowly where it hits hardest and it is my favourite element on the ride! After three back-to-back rides on Hyperia, I decided it was time to explore the rest of the park. Saw was still having some trouble opening, so I instead decided to head towards a B&M instead… Nemesis Inferno Nemesis Inferno was on an advertised 5 minute queue time and I hadn’t ridden it yet, so I decided to take advantage of this and give it a go. The queue time board was true to its word, and I was seated in row 4 within 5 minutes; it’s always good when that happens! So, how was it? Well, I’ve always liked Nemesis Inferno, and today was no exception! The ride was smooth with excellent forces and speed and some great inversions; what’s not to like? I also have some indecision in my mind about whether I rank it or Nemesis higher; as much as Inferno has the more conventional layout of the two, I quite like how it runs: After getting off Nemesis Inferno, I headed to a flat ride… Detonator Detonator was on an advertised 5 minute queue, so I decided to give it a go. The queue time board stayed true to its word, with me waiting only one cycle to board. So, how was it? Well, I do love a good drop tower, and Detonator is always an excellent one, with a wonderfully punchy drop! I always think these Fabbri models have more punch to them than you expect: After Detonator, I headed to a different coaster… Stealth Stealth was on an advertised 10 minute queue, so I decided to take a ride on there. The 10 minute queue was if anything slightly overstated, taking around 5 minutes, which is always great! So, how was the ride? Well, I do always love Stealth, and today was no exception; that hydraulic launch is so punchy, the airtime is great, and the speed is wonderful! I’ll admit that the more I ride it, the more I’m not a fan of the restraints on there; if it had the lap bars like Red Force, we’d be onto a winner. However, this is a minor niggle rather than a deal breaker; I still think it’s an absolutely awesome ride: After my first ride on Stealth, I had a reride while the queue was still short and I was still in the area. I was seated in the back once again, and it was once again awesome! After my reride on Stealth, I headed down towards another big coaster I hadn’t yet ridden during the day, but on the way over, I couldn’t resist another reride on Hyperia. Single rider delivered the goods in the form of a 5-10 minute wait once again, I was seated in row 6, and the ride was once again phenomenal! On a side note, I should add that unlike the typical trope of airtime trying to undress riders, Hyperia tried its very hardest to redress me each time I rode it; I was wearing a waterproof coat with the hood down, and without fail, the airtime in some of the elements made it fly up and stay over my head every time!: After Hyperia, I finally headed towards the coaster I was referring to before… Saw: The Ride Saw was on an advertised 30 minute queue, but as with Hyperia, I was able to exploit the secret weapon of the single rider queue to shorten this. Single rider delivered once again, with me only waiting 5-10 minutes for my ride on Saw; I can never moan about that! So, how was it? Well, Saw is never an absolute favourite of mine, but it wasn’t running too badly today. It was a bit rough in areas, but not too terrible. With time, one thing I have also grown to appreciate about Saw is the airtime; it’s not exactly known for airtime, but there are quite a few surprising pops of ejector throughout the ride, which I always like! The Euro-Fighter as a ride style is never the most comfortable and is rarely an absolute favourite of mine as a result, but with all things considered, Saw was running quite well today. It also provided me with a very fresh point of comparison for when I go and ride Drakon for the first time at the weekend: After Saw, I went to do another flat ride favourite of mine (and it’s rare that you hear me call a flat ride a “favourite”!)… Rush Rush was on an advertised 5 minute queue time. In actuality, this ended up being a walk-on for me, as I was batched into the next cycle that was about to be loaded; I can never moan about that! So, how was the ride? Well, despite not being a huge fan of flat rides on the whole, I’ve always liked Rush, and today was no exception! While somewhat repetitive as all flat rides are, I like the fact that it focuses on airtime and speed rather than spinning or repetitive forces, and I find the airtime at each peak and speed in each trough great fun! I do, however, bemoan the cycle on there; Rush runs quite a weak cycle, and only 1 or 2 full height swings were offered up today. As a point of comparison, I would say Rush in its current state feels markedly tamer than Serengeti Flyer at Busch Gardens Tampa, which ran a much longer cycle and had absolutely bags of sustained airtime and probably sits as my favourite non-drop tower flat ride as a result. Even still, I do always enjoy Rush, and I was glad to get on it: After Rush, I went to ride my final big coaster that I hadn’t yet ridden during the day… The Swarm The Swarm was on an advertised 5 minute queue time, so as I hadn’t yet ridden it today, I decided to take a ride on there. As promised, I only waited around 5 minutes before swiftly taking my seat in row 5. So, how was it? Well, I’ve always had a soft spot for Swarm, and while I’ve gone up and down on it over the years, it was running really well today! The first drop, with that awesome sensation of diving towards the ground, is truly ace, I love the floaty inversions, with the last roll being a particular highlight, and I also love the sheer sense of speed that the winged trains provide! It’s also a really smooth experience that is easy to reride and enjoy, and while the vest restraints aren’t my absolute favourite, they don’t lock and tighten as badly as they used to and the ride is more enjoyable for it. Overall, then, I had a fantastic ride on Swarm; I always enjoy it, and perhaps controversially, I increasingly think it might be my 2nd favourite coaster on park behind Hyperia again after a few years of having been lower down and behind Stealth: After getting off Swarm, the queue had shortened, so while I was in the area, I decided to partake in not one, but two back-to-back rerides. I had a back row and another row 5, and these were once again fantastic! After my rerides on Swarm, I headed for a reride on Detonator. Once again, it was an absolutely awesome drop tower with a surprising amount of kick for its size, and on this ride, they were interestingly running a slightly different audio track about it being “time to drop the gondola” that didn’t reference any of the firework theming that the regular one does: I then went for a reride on Nemesis Inferno. I was in row 6 this time, and it was once again great: I then went for another single rider queue reride on Hyperia. I was in row 7 this time, and it was once again sublime: I then sat down and ate my packed lunch before heading for not one, not two, but three brilliant back-to-back rerides on Stealth, in row 6, row 8 and row 9 respectively: I then went for another reride on Nemesis Inferno. I was on the back this time, and it was once again an awesome ride: After that, I went for another brilliant Detonator reride, where normal service seemed to have resumed from an audio perspective: I then went for three back-to-back rerides on The Swarm, in row 5, row 6 and row 5 respectively. Once again, these were excellent: After that, I went for another great walk-on ride on Rush; it was nice to spice the rerides up a little with a flat ride: After Rush, I went for another sublime Hyperia reride in row 7. I tried the main queue this time, as it had fallen to an advertised 10 minutes and single rider looked longer than earlier, but I’m not sure that single rider wouldn’t have been better, as it ultimately took 15. Even still, it moved quicker than single rider, still wasn’t particularly long, and wasn’t exactly impeding ride count given that this was the 27th ride of the day, so I can’t really complain: I then went for a reride on Nemesis Inferno. I was sat on the back this time, and it was awesome once again: After that, I was originally going to go for more rerides on Stealth and/or Swarm, but Stealth was closed and Hyperia remained short, so seeing as I was unlikely to ever see the Hyperia single rider queue so short again, I decided to take full advantage and park myself in Fearless Valley for the rest of the day (it was about 3:40pm by this point, and the park shut at 5pm). Unoriginal, I know, but Hyperia is easily my favourite ride on park and I’d had a perfectly good fill of the other coasters between this visit end my visit last month. Between 3:40 and park close, I managed 7 back-to-back rerides on Hyperia using the single rider queue, in a variety of different rows. I was unfortunately sat on the left hand side for a number of them, where the host seemed intent on stapling me to death each time, but on my final row 6 ride, I was sat on the right hand side, where I had possibly my loosest lap bar ever on Hyperia and flew miles out of the seat like never before on that first drop! On the plus side, the stapled rides did show me that Hyperia most certainly passes the stapling test in that it still hits hard with airtime even when you’re stapled in. That is not necessarily a given on an airtime machine! This sequence of rerides was a lovely way to finish off the day, and after a number of visits where I’ve only managed 2 rides on it, I was very pleased to close out the day with 13 Hyperia rides in total: After that, park close had arrived, so I headed out of the park and made my way back home, arriving back into Bristol Parkway at around 8pm. So, that wraps up my day at Thorpe Park! I had an absolutely amazing day; the park was nice and quiet, which meant that getting lots of rides in was easy! If you lost count, I managed 35 rides in total, which is the most I’ve ever managed at Thorpe Park (or any Merlin park, for that matter) and second only to 51 rides during last June’s deserted Paultons Park day overall. I can’t moan about that! My final ride tallies were: 13x Hyperia 6x The Swarm 5x Stealth 4x Nemesis Inferno 3x Detonator 2x Rush 1x Saw: The Ride 1x Colossus This day underscored to me how much I love Thorpe Park on days like this. On a day where I’m alone with short queues, there are very few parks I would pick to be in over Thorpe. The ride lineup is a wonderful one to reride, as you have lots of great choices! My definite highlight is Hyperia, but the likes of Swarm, Stealth and Inferno are also there to provide additional variety! Thanks for reading; I hope you’ve enjoyed this report! My next one will actually be arriving very soon, as I’m unexpectedly going to be attending the opening day of Valgard at Paultons Park on Saturday! It will be interesting to attend an opening day, if nothing else, and I can’t wait to see what the new land has to offer!

Glad you got the quiet day you'd hoped for! I agree with your comments about Rush - I love an S&S Screamin Swing but I don't even bother going on Rush anymore. I hope one day it can get replaced with a new version.

Good write up Nick. Would you not use the TP bus from the rail station? it must prove a cheaper option. Tuesday was another amazing low attendance day. Fred (planenut)

Launch pad looks near complete and a new screen has been installed. I imagine this area will be open before 10am and they'll do some kind of countdown for park opening in the morning? I'm certainly not complaining, but not sure how viable these last minute openings are, as the park was deserted today. First time I've seen Hyperia walk on and able to re-ride on empty seats throughout the day. Spent my afternoon lapping Hyperia and Stealth. Great atmosphere, particularly on Stealth as it was full of enthusiasts re-riding. Someone I spoke to had done over 80 laps 🤣

Bit of positive news having visited Hyperia Yesterday is just how good the operations are, the ride took 15 min to open after park open, which is ok as u can tell the ride is running slow in the cold (makes you wonder if wheel heaters are worth investing in) But such a great ride team, it was the same as when I visited last year, they will fly through the queue. It gets to the point where the ride barely stacks on the brake run (though obviously the brake run is relatively slow) Interesting observation is how many people where re joining the queue and how many asked for front row (and how a front row queue would become so overwhelming on this ride) Single rider is good though like Smiler at Towers, you wonder how many people in that queue are on there own ;p

It's a cable replacement and nothing crazy. The previous prolonged closure is not ideal, but if history is anything to go by, it should be okay now.

App says it’ll be reopening this Friday 1st May, which is in line with how long it takes them to do a cable change. They regularly do them a little faster than scheduled so wouldn’t surprise me to see it open Thursday afternoon.

Saying that, they're all related in one way or another so it's best to replace all of them.

It's because they decided to replace the cable now whilst its having catch car issues, best to rectify all the issues now in one go..

Whoa! Poor Stealth, get better soon 😭

What's happened now 😭

I'm quite impressed with engineering managing to get her back up this quick, massive props!!

Heard news that she's been testing today 😀

Interestingly Stealth has updated on the app to closed. Rather than closed all day or closed today. Perhaps some hope 😀

Not as off yet, nobody has told me anything; whether that's a matter of not being able to tell idk but we'll just have to wait and see

Prelude After a successful solo trip to Adventure Island and Thorpe Park the other week, I decided to make the most of my time off work before starting my new job and go on another trip away. And given that I only had one real semi-major park left to visit in the UK, I thought; what better park to do than that? So as a result, I strategised quite a spur-of-the-moment trip to the Midlands, consisting of both a first time visit to Fantasy Island in Lincolnshire after talking about going for a couple of years and a Merlin pass visit to Alton Towers (I know I was only last in Alton Towers 4 weeks ago, but the entry is free, I want to make use of my Merlin pass, it’s close to my choice of halfway point and I like Towers. Sue me!). In order to break up the ridiculously long rail journey to Skegness from my location (5+ hours), I decided to stay in Nottingham for 2 nights and travel up yesterday. I don’t have a huge amount to say about yesterday, but as a first-time visitor to Nottingham (and aside from a stop in Trowell services along the M1, the East Midlands full stop!), I did amble quite steadily to my hotel and try and take in my surroundings, and I did see these cool Robin Hood statues by the castle: I also came within touching distance of David off the recent series of Celebrity Traitors in Nottingham station on my way up, which I’m putting down as my most noteworthy celebrity sighting! Other than that, I can’t think of much else to mention. Nottingham is a lot like any other town centre in Britain, with some nice old buildings, but my hotel is in the student district near Nottingham Trent University and that has seen me be immersed in amongst some… interesting crowds at times. Anyway, let’s get onto the meat of the first park day… 23rd April 2026: Fantasy Island My Fantasy Island day started early. I got up at 6am, rope dropped breakfast in the hotel at 6:30am (I’m not sure that expression works quite as well outside of a theme park context…) and made my way to the station at just after 7am in time for a 7:41 train to Skegness. This train took a bit over 2 hours and was very prompt, although I have to say that the line between Grantham and Skegness has some of the bounciest sections of railway line I’ve ever ridden… after getting off the train, I got onto a very opportunely timed bus to Ingoldmells, passing key sights of the area like Botton’s Pleasure Beach (unfortunately closed, or else I might have considered grabbing the creds!) and Butlin’s. This got me to the park with plenty of time to spare: Upon reaching Fantasy Island, it wasn’t even 10:30am and the rides opened at 11am, so I had some time to kill. Seeing as I wasn’t entirely sure where I was going either, I decided to have a wander around and take a few pictures: Now this is where I was getting my first feel for Fantasy Island as a park, and at this point, I feel I should insert in some stray observations. Firstly, I have to say that it’s possibly one of the strangest parks I’ve ever visited. It’s a park of quite distinct halves, more so than perhaps any other I’ve been to; the indoor section is surprisingly heavily themed and atmospheric, whereas the outdoor section has a very permanent funfair-type atmosphere with little to no theming or atmosphere building. Possibly the oddest thing I noticed was the 7-day market; the park has a huge market at its heart with a very eclectic variety of stalls, to say the least. I didn’t browse the market too heavily (or at all, for that matter), but I saw clothes, homeware, garden apparel, towels, weaponry, off-brand merchandise for different brands, and even places where you seemingly could get body modifications including botox (?!). It almost reminded me of going to America for the first time and seeing that you could buy firearms in the same aisle as a roast chicken in Walmart; the range of items is very wide, very odd, and not what I would immediately associate with a theme park. It’s not really my cup of tea, but if you want to ride roller coasters and shop for a wide variety of oddities in the same day, Fantasy Island is the place for you! Anyhow, let me get to the rides. The rides were running in rotation today (hence my not immediately intuitive order of doing them), so I decided to start my day with the key coaster draw that was open for the first 2.5 hours of the day… Millennium Millennium was the thrill coaster open for the first period of the day, so I decided to start there. I was the first person in the queue, so resultantly, I was in the front row of the first train of the day at 11am. It’s great when that happens! So, how was it? Well, I’d always heard of Millennium being referred to as “the smoothest old Vekoma around”, and it was indeed very smooth… but on my first ride, I wasn’t immediately wowed as it seemed like there were large swathes that just… didn’t do a whole lot. Some of the inversions were fun, but on my first ride, there wasn’t a whole lot of kick and it just seemed to trundle around a lot. However, this first ride was also very cold, which was definitely a distractor when I wasn’t yet into the swing of riding for the day, and I didn’t quite have a full feel for the ride yet, so I decided not to make a snap judgement call there. All in all, my initial ride on Millennium was good fun, but not something that immediately wowed me. There is more to come from Millennium later in the day, however: After Millennium, I decided to stay in the pyramid and go for a dark ride… Harrington Flint’s Island Adventures Harrington Flint was nearby, open and walk-on, so I decided to take a ride on there. I was aware that Harrington Flint is a fairly unique dark ride, being the UK’s only use of trackless technology, and also a relatively recent addition, so I was intrigued to see what it was like. So, how was it? Well, I have to say that it was quite a fun little ride! It’s predominantly screen-based, but the screen quality is quite good, and there are some nice bits of physical theming too. I also got 61,000, which as someone who’s rubbish at interactive dark rides, I’m not going to complain about! All in all, then, I enjoyed Harrington Flint; I thought it was a surprisingly well-done ride for a park of this calibre, and I definitely thought it had nice theming and was good fun: After Harrington Flint, I headed back outside to try a flat ride I was wanting to get on… Volcano Volcano was open and walk-on, so I decided to have a ride on there. While I have ridden S&S shot towers plenty of times before, I always enjoy a tower ride, so I was keen to get on Volcano at least once today. As I just mentioned, I walked straight onto the ride, and as I was the only person approaching, I got a completely solo ride, which is always interesting! But how was the ride? Well, I always like a tower ride, and this was quite a good one; the upwards launch was punchy, and there was a very nice pop of air at the top! As S&S shot towers go, I’d say Volcano is one of the better ones I’ve done; I’d certainly take it comfortably over my last memory of Ice Blast (pre-revamp) at Blackpool, for example. I do think my preference overall errs towards a regular drop tower like Detonator over a shot tower, but the shot towers are still great fun and I still thoroughly enjoyed Volcano; at this point of the day, it was perhaps my favourite attraction: After Volcano, I headed for another coaster… Rhombus Express Rhombus Express was once again walk-on (you’re going to get bored of me saying this…), so I decided to take a ride on there. I waltzed straight onto the back row; if Runaway Mine Train at Alton is anything to go by, back is always my seat of choice on a powered coaster! So, how was the ride? Well, I find family powered coasters can be a bit hit and miss, with some like Runaway Mine Train at Alton Towers falling into “surprisingly fun underdog” territory and others like Jormungandr at Drayton Manor being much of a muchness. To my delight, Rhombus Express falls into the former category; this thing absolutely flies! Powered coasters never have overly intense layouts, but this one is taken at some speed and has some great helixes that pack surprising punch; there’s one towards the end in particular that has some really surprising kick! All in all, then, I thought Rhombus Express was an excellent powered coaster that took me by surprise; it falls squarely into that Runaway Mine Train bracket of packing surprising thrills for a family coaster, and as the traditional powered coasters go, it’s right up there with RMT and Europa Park’s previous Alpenexpress as one of the best for me: After Rhombus Express, I headed over to the other side of the park to get another new coaster in… Apple Coaster As many of you will know, I don’t typically do kiddie coasters (although I’m honestly starting to question whether I can say that anymore…), but as Apple Coaster was walk-on and had no one in the vicinity, I decided to give this particular kiddie cred a try. In this particular case, I was actually the only one on the train, so I was batched right at the front on the caterpillar’s face! In terms of the ride itself, there’s not really an awful lot to say; it’s a big apple, and these coasters are what they are: After Apple Coaster, I headed for another ride on Millennium. I was seated in row 4 this time, and for some reason, it definitely clicked much more than the first time! The ride overall seemed more potent and thrilling, and I felt like even some of the gentler sections were more fun and had slightly more purpose. While the layout is quite odd and does have its dead spots, I quite like how the ride almost feels a bit like an adventure around the park; it’s quite good fun to ride! It’s maybe more than the sum of its parts in this sense, and towards the end of the layout, the ride does try to inject a little more spice into the scenic sections: After my reride on Millennium, I had a reride on Volcano, which was my longest queue of the day at the heady heights of 10-15 minutes (only 2 cycles, though). Once again, the ride was great fun, with a punchy launch and some great airtime at the top: After my reride on Volcano, I headed for a reride on Rhombus Express. I only waited one cycle, I sat on the back once again, and the ride was once again a surprisingly good powered coaster; I do have a soft spot for a powered coaster that has a surprising kick: After my reride on Rhombus Express, I sat down in the pyramid and had lunch. I was frugal on this occasion and had purchased a Co-op meal deal in Nottingham station, but I did get the added bonus of seeing a surprisingly elaborate-looking projection mapping show, complete with lighting, voiceover and fake snow, while I was sat in the pyramid. This was a nice touch and fun to watch, but perfectly sums up my point from earlier about the park being one of two halves, I feel; you almost wouldn’t think the pyramid and the outdoor area were in the same park. After lunch, I went for not one, but two back-to-back rerides on Millennium. One was in row 3 and one was in the back, and once again, these were good fun; the ride definitely grew on me after my initial ride in the morning: I then went for another reride on Rhombus Express. The host had changed and I was made to sit in row 2 this time, but I still only waited one cycle and the ride was still really good fun; even in the front, it packed a punch: After my reride on Rhombus Express, I went for one final reride on Millennium. I walked onto row 3, and the ride was once again really good fun; despite my cold demeanour towards it in the morning, it had definitely risen in my estimations with additional rides to fall solidly into “good little ride, that” territory by the time it shut for the day. It’s not quite overall top quartile or UK top 10 material for me, but it’s a good, fun ride for sure and probably my favourite coaster across any of the 4 East Coast parks I’ve been to (Fantasy Island, Adventure Island, Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach and Pleasurewood Hills): After my final reride on Millennium, the next ride rotation was about to open (the open rides, aside from a select few that stayed open all day, changed at 1:30pm), so I decided to pre-emptively get into the queue for my other main draw to Fantasy Island… Odyssey It was approaching 1:30pm, so I decided to head over to Odyssey and pre-emptively wait for it to open. The changeover maybe wasn’t completely seamless, so the ride ended up opening at more like 1:45pm after some minutes of waiting for the staff to arrive and pre-testing. Even still, I was one of the first on the first train of the day, so I walked straight into row 2; I can never quibble with that, even if I might have liked the front for my first go! So, how did I find Odyssey? Well, despite it being an SLC, Odyssey seems to get a fair amount of praise, so with Kumali also being pretty enjoyable and proving to me that SLCs are not a complete lost cause as a ride type if they aren’t the standard layout, I entered Odyssey with some cautious optimism. As much as I Ioathe Infusion, I do love a big, fast coaster, so I thought; surely Odyssey’s sheer height and speed will make it a fairly decent ride, even if not top end material? Alas, these hopes were dashed upon hitting the bottom of the first drop, where I quickly realised that a big, fast SLC is sadly still an SLC. The rush down towards the ground is pretty impressive, but as soon as you pull any kind of force, the train just bashes you around horribly; it bounced up and down aggressively to such an extent that it made my stomach hurt while also relentlessly bashing your head between the restraints. The first couple of elements are undeniably impressive in scale, but are so rough that they’re difficult to enjoy, and after that, it just seems to devolve into doing very little aside from being utterly brutal and beating you up high above the ground. I dearly wanted Odyssey to be an underdog like Kumali, but for me, I’m afraid the ride just wasn’t enjoyable at all, I definitely found it overhyped, and I’d go as far as to say that after my first ride, I perhaps controversially rated it right down there with Infusion (I’m genuinely not sure whether I actually preferred it to my last go on Infusion, in fact) and was stunned that a coaster of such scale could be so awful to ride. I felt I should give it another go later to be fair, however: After my first ride on Odyssey, I headed to go and grab my final credit of the day… Snow Drift Snow Drift had just opened and was the last coaster I needed and was able to ride at Fantasy Island (being well over 1.6m tall, I didn’t even attempt Jellikins), so I headed to take a ride on it. I only waited one car or so for my ride; I can never complain about that! So, how was it? Well, I discovered that despite this apparently being a Mellors-built coaster, it is basically a clone of the Reverchon spinning wild mice that I know and hate, and resultantly, it just wasn’t a ride experience I enjoyed. I just don’t like the strong laterals on these wild mouse coasters, and while this one wasn’t an outstandingly bad example of the ride type, none of them are coasters I rate simply due to the intrinsic nature of them not being something I overly enjoy: After Snow Drift, I went for a reride on Odyssey, hoping for it to redeem itself and for us to have a repeat of the Millennium saga from earlier in the day. Alas, I was in row 2 again, and such hopes were quickly dashed; it was just as awful as it was the first time: Feeling slightly delicate after a rough ride on Odyssey, I then decided to go into the pyramid to find something else to do. I resultantly went on a bit of a journey of discovery doing a few random attractions, starting with… Toucan Tours I had no idea what Toucan Tours was, but the entrance made it sound intriguing, so I decided to give it a go. I waited around 5 minutes for this, with 1 or 2 cars of people in front of me, so it was another short wait that I couldn’t complain about. So, how was it? And what was it, for that matter? Well, it turned out that Toucan Tours was a sweet little monorail attraction that started with some nice panoramic views of the pyramid area before going into a few dark ride scenes. The dark ride scenes were relatively static, for the most part, but I found the whole thing quite endearing! It was a very nice little attraction, with some nice physical theming and set pieces, and I would say it was a real hidden gem: After getting off Toucan Tours, I continued my journey of discovery in the pyramid with a ride on… Seaquarium Seaquarium was nearby and I’d seen the entrance while on Toucan Tours, so as it was also an attraction I’d had recommended to me, I decided to take a ride on there. Again, it was walk-on, which is a bonus, and again, I wasn’t entirely sure what to expect; I had an inkling it was a dark ride, but other than that, I wasn’t really sure. So, how was it? Well, like Toucan Tours above, I have to say that I found Seaquarium to be an absolute hidden gem of an attraction; what a lovely little dark ride! There was lots of moving scenery, there was lots to look at, and all in all, I just found the whole thing very sweet! It was certainly an enjoyable dark ride, and I’m very glad I stumbled across it: After getting off Seaquarium, I decided to have a go on the attraction whose entrance was next to it… The Guardian The Guardian’s entrance was next door to Seaquarium, so in the spirit of continuing my journey of discovery in the pyramid, I decided to have a go on there. I remember it being built, but I’ll admit I had very little idea of what was actually in here once again. To add to the anticipation, I spent a few minutes wondering if it was actually open, as I stood alone on some stairs in front of a random door for a good few minutes… it felt very weird being the only one stood in front of this door while looking over children doing the Macarena on the stage below (incidentally, this gave me flashbacks to our hotel in PortAventura, where the Macarena was the subject of the children’s entertainment and we could quietly overhear it every night while having a drink)! The 1.4m height restriction and enclosed nature certainly sent my mind racing, and I initially had inklings in my head of a Top Scan, for some reason (?), but then I did remember something about a robotic arm, so was not too surprised when the ride turned out to be a robotic arm. What I didn’t expect, however, was the inclusion of a curved screen telling a story, thus making the composite ride experience something akin to a pound shop flying theatre. And you know what, it actually works surprisingly well! When combining the robotic arm movements with the story on screen, it did make for a nice little themed experience! I also didn’t find the robotic arm movements too intense; I sometimes found that Forbidden Journey at Universal, which uses similar robotic arm technology, made me a little bit motion sick, but this didn’t seem as bad, bizarrely. All in all, then, I thought The Guardian was a very simple, but effective themed attraction, and yet again, I’d say it falls very nicely into the bracket of “hidden gem”: After getting off The Guardian, I went back outside and perhaps against my better judgement, I decided to give Odyssey one final chance. I was seated on the front this time, so I wondered if it might be better, but while the sense of speed was heightened somewhat, the ride was sadly every bit as bad as before if not worse. With my stomach really hurting and my ears throbbing after a particularly hard whack during that last ride (that my right ear still feels slightly bruised from now), I decided at that point that I’d given Odyssey enough chances and was unlikely to ever rate it. With it being the park’s arguable crown jewel and such a big, fast ride, I really, really wanted to like it, but I sadly just didn’t at all. I’m sorry to say it, but when I think of the actual ride experience, I don’t think I’ve ever ridden a coaster that huge with so few redeeming qualities. As much as the size is impressive and it’s undeniably unique, the ride experience is no better than regular old Infusion for me, which means it’s really not something I rate at all: After my reride on Odyssey, I headed over to Rhombus Express for another reride. I was sat in row 14 this time, and it was once again a really good, fun powered coaster; it flies around the layout and really does pack a punch in places: After my Rhombus Express reride, I decided to head for a flat ride… Star Flyer It dawned on me that as ubiquitous as they are, I’d never actually ridden a Star Flyer before, so as Fantasy Island had one that was walk-on, I decided to give it a go. So, how was my first experience of a Star Flyer? Well, it was certainly an interesting ride experience! As much as I’m not generally a huge lover of flats, the spinning wasn’t too intense on this, and it was quite exhilarating flying high above the ground and having the wind rush into your face: After Star Flyer, I had a final reride on Rhombus Express. I was sat in the back once again, and it was once again really good fun: After that Rhombus Express reride, I closed out my day with a final new flat ride… Techno Jump Techno Jump was walk-on, so as it was a style of flat ride I’d never done before, I decided to take a ride on there. During the era of the Retrosquad at Alton Towers, people used to rave about Mixtape, so I was intrigued to see how one of these Smashing Jumps rode. But how was it? Well, I initially thought it was quite good fun; the jumping produced some fun weightless g-forces, and the spinning wasn’t too intense! However, they ran it for a very long cycle that seemed to get progressively more intense, and I’ll admit this perhaps made it surpass my (relatively low) flat ride tolerance. Had it been a shorter cycle, I would have thought it an enjoyable ride, but the length of cycle made it a little bit much for me in this case. On a side note, a guest remark I heard on this ride really did exemplify the odd hybrid environment that Fantasy Island has cultivated. I overheard someone ask the ride operator “do you need an ID to get a tattoo in that shop over there?”, and it made me think that Fantasy Island must be one of very few places around where you can get a tattoo and ride a roller coaster in the same trip… I find it all quite peculiar, personally, but each to their own: After getting off Techno Jump, ride close was fast approaching, so content with my day, I decided to aim for an earlier train to Nottingham and catch an Uber out of Ingoldmells to get back to Skegness and catch the train to Nottingham: So, that brings a close to my first day at Fantasy Island in Lincolnshire! I had a really good day; I got on 23 rides in total, which is not to be sniffed at in the space of under 5 hours, and I was glad to get the +5, get on Millennium and Odyssey for the first time, and see my final semi-major UK park! It does feel pretty good to have completed the semi-major UK parks and seen everything that’s a major draw coasters-wise; now that my most notable unridden UK coaster has gone drastically down in magnitude to some Pinfari somewhere, I can live with that! As for Fantasy Island itself; as I inferred further up, I found it an odd park. As I’ve reiterated multiple times, it’s a park of two such distinct halves that they almost don’t feel like the same park. The pyramid area is absolutely lovely, with nice theming, some real hidden gem dark rides and a general high-quality atmosphere, while the outdoor area, with a few exceptions, mostly feels like a permanent funfair with all the atmosphere of an out-of-town industrial estate. And the market is really quite an odd extra dimension… I’ve never been anywhere quite like Fantasy Island! Attractions-wise, there’s actually a surprising amount to like; as much as Odyssey was a big disappointment for me, Millennium was really good fun, Volcano was good, Rhombus Rocket was surprisingly good, the dark rides in the pyramid were good… there’s definitely a fair amount there! Considering the distance I live from it, I’m not sure I’d specifically make the effort to return unless they built something major that warranted it, but I’d go back if I was in the area for other purposes. I’m definitely glad I went, though, and I had a good day overall! Thanks for reading; I hope you’ve enjoyed this report! Keep your eyes peeled for a trip report from Alton Towers tomorrow!

Thank you for the update, hopefully they fix it soon (and hopefully fix the second return motor to up the catch car return speed) maybe go on some of the rides in close vicinity like Swarm or Detonator to get a good view of whats going on. I am in contact with Zone 3 staff so I shall ask what's going on 😁

Thanks for this Jax, I will keep an eye on the ride activity. It's a shame she's such a complex ride but nevertheless the engineering team do an amazing job trying to get her back. Must be a hard job for them

Operator was clearly just feeling generous, unless they run 5 laps as standard now. But they do usually adjust laps based on queue time.

Never seen that before, and it hasn't been like that all of this year. Could just be because the weather was nice and staff wanted to more be outside. Could be they're trying it there to advise people of potentially long waits for front row (it holds a lot of people). Could be a security thing. Will be interesting to see if they carry on doing that; it's certainly a bit further away from the rows so harder to see

The operator can control the amount of laps, so it usually runs between 2-5 laps. 3 laps is pretty standard, 2 when its very busy and then 5 when its quiet. I've personally not seen more than 5. Odd they were doing 5 laps if it was busy though 🤣

Colossus getting a higher throughput than Hyperia I do hope they consider throughput for their next big coaster. No matter how hard the staff work you can't really achieve a high throughput on it and when its the most popular ride on park, with a huge RAP and Fasttrack allocation it struggles on the busy days.

Shuffles around at that level aren't all that uncommon. I believe the previous VP of Legoland Windsor has moved to a broader role within Merlin. Obviously we don't know the exact day-to-day responsibilities of the VP / Divisional Director roles of the parks, but as has been mentioned, the past few years with Neil in charge have seen lots of positives with operations and general improvements. Thorpe has, for the last couple of years as a minimum, been generally considered the best operated Merlin UK park, with the best reliability, best food, best Halloween event and just in general doing well given the relative tight purse strings from Merlin above. That certainly won't be down to one person, but things like that happen when you've got good leadership in place.

And what does Parm Pap like, beyond long-winded ways of saying (I presume) "the water effect won't make a splash back soon"?

Closed all day again today, no train on the track, a sign in the plaza and a member of staff letting people know, but that’s it 😭

It looks like Stealth has been having a few issues recently. It's not looking great. Hopefully it isn't too bad and the engineers have her fixed soon enough.