Matt 236

2020, it’s been one crazy roller coaster ride and sadly one that hasn’t been particularly enjoyable. It has been rougher than a ride on Saw or Gouderix. With a massive pandemic halting life as we know it, everything has been challenging in general, let alone theme parks. Skip ahead to now and with parks cautiously reopening I would finally get to visit a one again, this time a new one. Fantasy Island in Ingoldmells near Skegness is an amusement located adjacent to a large open air market. Now in the hands of the Mellor’s group, this would be an ideal opportunity to nail the final key U.K. park on my bucket list. On the surface, it might just look like your typical sea side fun fair or something (which it somewhat is). And you might even mistake it for Winter Wonderland if you look at from certain angles. But it’s a good one at that featuring a decent selection of attractions. Like this flat ride which was actually a lot of fun. The drop tower is alright except for the silly short seatbelts! They have an alright log flume, which is actually fun. Rhombus Rocket is one of five park coasters. It might look your standard powered coaster off ride, but this thing really packs a punch and gives off airtime that I didn’t think was possible on such a ride. Easily my favourite U.K. ride type, which isn’t actually a Mack but made by WGH transportation. One of the main attractions is the Millenium. At 20 years it’s still silky smooth and looking fresh after a funky paint job a few years ago. Probability my favourite there although the ride station’s placement on the street is both hilarious and unique. Until a few years ago the entrance was too. The other headliner is Odyssey, a large Vekoma SLC, erm. At 167ft it is the tallest SLC ever made and third tallest U.K. coaster. SLCs have a reputation in the industry of mostly being rough and uncomfortable coasters. This ride is not exception as your head and ears are constantly bashed around as the ride completes it’s circuit. Despite the roughness there was something I liked about this coaster although it may be last of the three ride types I’ve done. If they modified or replaced the train to decrease roughness I think it would be a great attraction. Think I’m dreading Condor if I get to do that. A pyramid building resides in the park’s centre. This houses several amenities from bars, restaurants, arcades and several attractions. The charming interior design reminds me of Coral island and the ‘original’ Dome albeit on a greater scale. There are two dark rides in here, one of them is the Magical Seaquarium. Opening in 1995, it’s certainly a charming attraction with an upbeat soundtrack which synchronises better than some. Sadly a number of effects were broken which given current circumstances probably isn’t a high priority for the park. Although rumours suggest a refurbishment is planned. Toucan Tours is the other dark ride, where you enter an enclosed section with numerous scenes after meandering the pyramid area. It’s quite random but enjoyable nonetheless. Some of the pyramid’s other inhabitants include a few kids rides such a tracked pony ride, a water slide (which was sadly closed when visiting and a Jurassic themed mini golf. The second half was themed noticeably better than the first, however space limitations are likely the result of this. It’s still amazing how much has actually been squeezed into the building since the refurbishment 2/3 years ago. Overall Fantasy Island is a fun and pleasantly enjoyable park, even in the amidst of a pandemic. Usually you’d be free to roam and enter the place from many angles, but for now it is a strict entry system. Operations at the park are alright and everything else including food is to an adequate level too. Although a fight apparently did break out whilst queuing for the Flume. We took a walk down the road where numerous bars, restaurants and amusements were and was pleasantly surprised to see how buzzing and upbeat the place was. Haven’t seen this in years and gave a rich holiday feel. However social distancing was rarely properly seen. Would recommend, but just be careful.

Got stuck on Bubbleworks where we were literally the last boat before the station so couldn’t get off. No evac either. Got stuck on Swarm’s breakrun for a little while during a breakdown. No evac again although I’ve been up Swarm’s lifthill during a coaster climb experience. Shut down on De Vlieglande Hollander on the break run(recurring theme?). Again no evac. Stuck on Helix’s brake run. Mr Fish was on the train behind and got some kind of evac, so I’m very jealous there. Now some more interesting ones: Stuck on Ninjago ride at Legoland, evac’d off from final scene with the help of steps from vehicle. Evac’d from the Dragon brake run at Legoland As a result of working for Thorpe, I have assisted with breakdowns and evacs on rides including Rumba, Storm Surge and Tidal Wave.

Congrats on hitting 200 creds. I know I’m a couple of new coasters off that, which is a great milestone indeed. Park looks alright.

On the positive side, at least the park has been saved from closure especially amidst one of the most challenging times in the attraction industry to date. The Loopings group don’t appear to invest often in new attractions, but hopefully we might see some new attractions here given how many how shuttered over the years bar Thomas Land.

Zeus is an interesting one. I still liked it but came off feeling a little underwhelmed because it just seemed to lack something compared to the likes of Wodan, Troy, etc. Oziris is pure class though and maybe even underrated. I found Gouderix rough on both my rides, which were during the start of my day. Having read the review, I get the impression you like water rides! They do have some great ones there too. Shame the madhouse wasn’t running properly as it is usually a great attraction. However given things currently that’s understandable sadly. L’Aerolaf sounds unique and I always wondered what it was when I went. The ommitance of a major dark ride is definitely noticeable. They used to have a ghost train called Transdemonium, but they removed it last year and use it’s space for winter events. Hopefully they can open a new one after the coaster is built. Good to see the park doing a reasonably good job with handling things and definitely consider the place underrated in many ways.

Pirates in Batavia (2.0) opened today at the park. Press photos below Looks stunning. A POV of the attraction. The effort into updating and restoring a former much-loved attraction is simply remarkable, let alone rebuilding something on this scale in just two years. Amazing!

One of the issues with the Swarm is unlike most rides, it’s in an area of the park by itself (bar toilets and a (currently closed) shop. The location feels strangely out of the way especially as layouts go, however that would’ve probably been rectified if the park followed the MTDP. The Swarm (though not immediately) is definitely amongst the more popular and well received attractions at the park. I think it’s “supposed” failure (by Merlin standards) is perhaps down to not only some confusing marketing, but the overall disappointing 2012 season attraction-wide. The olympics That year were expected to bring in large crowds/tourism, but the opposite happened likely down to fears of this happening. Towers also much lower figures. Camelot shut down as a result.

Shame neither park seemed great, the redeeming features look interesting.

Yesterday was my first Thorpe visit of the year and park trip post lockdown. The park’s covid measures were a mixed bag with temperature checks, staff and announcements enforcing social distancing in queues and places along with sanitiser being available on most rides. However there is definitely room for improvement as the spots on the floor haven’t got the best placements and have already faded in just a couple of weeks. I also think the park need to try and enforce people to walk one way on the sides of main pathways and place more protector in queuelines. Guest social distancing wasn’t great. On a side note operations were generally ok on most attractions with Stealth and the two B&Ms performing excellently. Saw was still torturous and Quantum a bit of a disappointment only doing two top hits on it’s cycle. The shops used a-basket system to determine numbers where you were given a basket when you entered and would return it to be cleaned when you left. The Saw, Swarm, Derren and Flock shops were closed along with some eateries. It was great to be back at the park after longer than usual,but there was certainly a strange and maybe slightly underwhelming atmosphere. This could be as a result of the extra safety measures and yet some places feeling like a normal park day or that the park felt empty in some ways. The park looks and feels tired and rundown in many areas and for some reason feels even more noticeable than previous visits. Whilst some cosmetic changes have been done, these don’t really feel enough and almost seem like a token gesture just for the sake of upkeep. In spite of these things it was great to be back at my first (post-lockdown) park trip and hopefully not my last!

Well that escalated quickly. First drop looks great, hopefully the rest of the ride will follow-suite.

I wouldn’t say Smiler is the worst name, far from it when you have attraction names such as Raj’s Bouncy Bottom Burp or Derren Brown’s Ghost Train. The name Croc Drop isn’t particularly inspiring either band comes across as one of the blandest names created. Sounds more like a confectionary product then a ride IMO. I think the names of Merlin’s attractions have always been hit and miss over years with some better than others. Blue Barnacle is probably one of the better ones in recent years for sure. Smiler on another level definitely needs some TLC as it looks the most delapidated of the seven main coasters.

Don’t think I’ve heard of this place but it looks surprisingly decent with some of their attractions and theming there. Soquet are certainly a bizarre manufacturer it seems. Shame on the sea view, but the BBQ place sounds pleasant enough.

Thorpe experienced an ambitious and significant amount of investment and expansion during the 2000’s which carried on until around 2012 (or less-so 2016). Realistically it was unviable to continue this level of expansion as Thorpe were going to run out of space if kept at the level they were, so a slow down was going to be inevitable, even if the one we’ve received is more of a stop! This is also the issue you have the park’s two previous major investments have been deemed unsuccessful from a corporation that expects return from investment. The park’s marketing and direction is another problem, over the years the park has constantly changed branding and marketing. One year they’ll appeal to families and then thrill seekers the next, before trying to appeal to all ages the year after before repeating this all again. Thorpe lacks a definitive brand point where parks such as Towers and Chessington are seemingly better at let alone others. Off years haven’t been used particularly effectively at the park as rather than refurbishing and cleaning up delapidated areas they’ve blown it on cheap and tacky unpopular experiences such as I’m a Celeb/Jungle Escape. So many areas of the park look rundown and the ratio of horror attractions only worsens this. There have been some efforts to refresh small areas of the park, but these have resulted in a one step forwards three back scenario. Where features/theming have been removed and not replaced leaving an even weaker impression, e.g The Dome. The park have a way to go in terms of restoring and getting back on the road again. But given the current positions both financially and operationally, that will probably never happen.

Dark rides are one of my favourite park attractions, some are great but others less-so. Here are my least favourite indoor/dark rides I have ridden to date. I am excluding travelling rides such as those at Winter Wonderland. 10/ The Ferrari Land Simulators- Ferrari Land, Port Aventura Both attractions aren’t anything remarkable and just come across as bland and unoriginal. Both attractions share the same pre-show which is boring and tedious to watch. Not to mention worsens their throughputs and is pretty much an advert for a product 90% of it’s visitors will never own. 9/ Castillo Del Terror- Tivoli World I’ve been on my fair share of ghost trains and this isn’t the worst but it could be better. The timing of half the scenes in here is off and the rest either turned off or never repaired. 8/ Ghost Train- Brighton Pier Mediocre, off timing and generally poorly maintained. No surprises there maybe. 7/ Fairy Tale Castle- Liseberg I had a love-hate relationship with this ride but it still wasn’t great. A tacky yet hilarious selection of dated fairy tale animatronics accompanied by the Droomvlucht soundtrack. It might be gone now (part of Valkyria stands there now) but never forgotten! N.B some of the cars and theming are reused as Halloween theming. Quite fitting perhaps. 6/ Golden Nugget Wild West Shootout-Drayton Manor bland, underwhelming and left me with no impression on my experience. The open plan setting made it feel about as exciting as a trip to Tesco’s and that’s saying a lot. The ride has been updated since my experience so might be less terrible now. 5/ Tales Of The Coast- Pleasurewood Hills Very bizarre ride with a somewhat monotone dialogue and a strange yet underwhelming scene selection. It was demolished a few years ago and replaced by a chair swing. Whether that’s an improvement remains to be seen. 4/ Charlie And The Chocolate Factory- Alton Towers An absolute travesty of a dark ride has got to be one of the most underwhelming I have ever experienced. Boring cardboard cut out scenes and narrative dialogue that’s amongst the worst ever seen. The elevator part was alright and probably helped being near the exit too. 3/ Boo Blasters- Kings Island Awful awful awful. Such a pointless attraction with a dreadful narrative and zero storyline. Apparently it used to be themed to Scooby Doo in the Paramount days, but whats there now is much much worse. This was my first and dark ride I have done in the states and given the current state of things, it might well be my last! Shame. 2/ Derren Brown’s Ghost Train Rise Of The Demon- Thorpe Park Resort Having a dark ride at my home park should be something delightful, unfortunately though I can’t say that here. DBGTROTD is far more of an embarrassment than an innovation to the industry. It uses hundreds of potentially interesting ideas in the worst possible way, is unreliable and less re-rideable than a bad SLC. It has aged terribly for what should still be a new attraction and is tied around the park’s neck for the foreseeable future with much investment in the dust as a result. 1/ Impossible- Blackpool Pleasure Beach I have only ever been on this once and that was six years ago. I have no intention to re-ride it soon. Most of Blackpool’s dark rides are good or at least charming but not this! It serves no purpose for the park and is hilariously awful in every shape and form.

Think we are overdue an update from the amazing Batavia project. Video covers elements including the new theming and animatronics which look amazing and remarkably authentic too. I’m looking forward to the final result when this opens.

Can be arranged.

Wickerman is arguably the best coaster Towers have built this Millenium. Sure, it’s not the biggest or longest coaster but what it does is great and delivers theming and storyline not many other coasters have really done in the U.K., especially during recent years.

I wish shared some of the above optimism. Next year Chessington will be getting a drop tower along with the new Blue Barnacle (assuming it’s delayed), which already for the park is already quite an investment. Aside from the odd thing here and there such as signage and a minor refresh around Forbidden Kingdom, I can’t see most of the above ever happen let alone next year.

I understand some may be disappointed by the constant negativity here, but unfortunately it cannot help the bigger picture. Over the years we have seen character, styling and features ripped out with some former attractions even rotting in guest view. Yes Thorpe hasn’t been in the best state (even before the virus), but appearance and presentation should be priority regardless of parks going down the themed routes or not! How can one stay positive when a building on a main path is stripped of character making it any eyesore? Or when the park’s entrance is stripped thread-bare of it’s last remnants of charm and character, making it look more underwhelming than a deprived shopping centre? Who knows, in the spite of things and these challenging circumstances we face in life, these could well be part of larger scale refurbishment. In 2021 we might see a further refreshed dome or that building worked on go look more presentable. However one has to lack on the overall track record on things to see just how unlikely any of this will happen. Especially when only key funding is likely to be injected into Thorpe (more-so).

All of it! I’ve seen industrial estates that look more picturesque than that eyesore and it’s crazy how something as little as a canopy can be the difference between something looking ok or dreadful. Cant see this improving anytime soon, judging how other areas such as the Dome now look as well in comparison.

**Immediately books up to visit that random German park** Just kidding, but it looks quirky to say the least. Gerstlauer still Gerstlauer then.

It’s no secret that B&M are very much the Rolls Royce/Lamborghini of ride manufacturers to this day. Whilst they are arguably less innovative than in the 90’s, they continue to build strong, reliable and often popular re-rideable coasters. Many companies such as Sea World and Cedar Fair frequency buy models from them, with their dive and hyper models still being remarkably popular. Duelling Dragons is the only B&M known to be fully scrapped to this day. The introduction of a launch coaster would be a great and logical move, especially when these types of coaster are especially popular with the likes of Taron, Helix etc.

Given the whole situation of this, we could, we could easily make a whole topic about “exposed” theme park sheds. But that’s for another day. I have seen worser looking sheds than this.

In an interesting but understandable decision, the Splash Mountain attractions at Disneyland and Disney World will be getting Princess And The Frog rethemes. Information can be found Here. Heres some concept art. This will definitely be a very mixed with fans across the globe, but given increasing tensions on certain matters, it was probably only a matter of time. I haven’t done either of the originals so can’t comment for one, but the new theme chosen is definitely a good choice for replacement.

I don’t remember the queue being a major problem when I visited, but that’s not to say it’s easy. With the right tape and placements, it should be manageable. If the Ultimate isn’t reopening with the park, my only reasons for seeing this are: Not being able to reach minimum operating capacity due to social distancing Insufficient funds to maintain and/or operate the attraction If the latter is why this is closed this is very concerning for the park and could mark the indefinite beginning of the end for Lightwater. However one could question the downward spiral has been hitting for years, with numerous ride removals!