Inferno

Rewinding just over two years ago, I and a few friends had booked a trip out to Hamburg, which would include one and a half days at Heide Park - plus a stay in their hotel - and a day at Hansa Park. It would coincide with two of our birthdays too. What better way than to spend a birthday at a new park?
 
At the time, this Covid-19 thing had just turned up on the British doorstep, and concerns were growing. But the idea of a lockdown was a far away thought. Obviously, come March, that all changed, and the trip cancelled (fortunately fully refunded). So instead of celebrating my birthday in some new foreign park, it was spent hunkered down in lockdown. "Ah well, maybe net year" I thought. Obviously I could go to Hamburg at other times, but I dunno, something felt kind of right about doing this trip over my birthday.
 
But the world had other plans. Lockdown III was coming to an end, but foreign travel was out of the question, and the UK parks were out of the question. Instead, my birthday in 2021 was spent playing some outdoor mini golf (which was a big deal at the time tbf). 
 
Early 2022 came around, and things seemed a bit more promising. Maybe I could spend a birthday out of lockdown for the first time since 2019!! And maybe, just maybe, I could finally get out to Hamburg. I tried to rally up those who I originally planned to go with, but after being met with radio silence, it became apparent if this was going to happen, I'd be going solo.
 
Ooft. Solo park trips aren't something I've done for a long time. Well, I haven't really done them at all. I've maybe spent a couple of hours at a park alone when someone had to leave unexpectedly early, or a bit of time when arriving early. But never a full day, and never at a new park. But to be honest, it wasn't a difficult choice..."ahhhh, screw it, let's do it!" was basically my thought process.
 
To keep costs minimal, this was going to be a short trip - fly in on a Tuesday evening, one park Wednesday, one park Thursday, fly home Thursday night. Ideally I'd've flown in Wednesday morning, but flight times just didn't work out. I had planned to drive too, but that was very costly (plus the rising fuel prices scared me), but I quickly realised both parks were pretty accessible by train. It increased the journey times, but it saved a lot of money really.
 
Anyways, enough pre-amble ramblings. Time to get to it...
 
Day 0
This was my first flight since January 2020. Things have changed a fair bit since then, with both Brexit and Covid. Gatwick airport was pretty chill, and boarding on the Easyjet flight was fine. As Germany require FFP2 masks in certain places (such as planes, airports and trains), crew were freely giving out these masks to anyone who didn't have that specific type of mask. Pretty chill.
 
A not-short queue through passport control followed. It was at this point where I expected to have to show my vaccine passport (the only requirement to get into Germany at the time), but I didn't. Oh well.
 
My hotel was a 20 minute walk from the airport, and was surprisingly cheap and nice given the location. Boom, easy.
 
Day 1 - Heide Park
I was faced with two problems for my day at Heide Park.
 
First thing, the weather. The weather had been pretty miserable the past few days prior; cold and wet with threats of storms. Having checked their park app in the days prior, that seemed to be affecting ride availability too. And the weather today didn't seem much better - cold and dark clouds, with high chances of rain. Just a tad concerning. 
 
The second was more of an "operational" concern. The park say on their website that the nearest train station to the park is Wolterdingen, which is a 20 minute walk to the park. Annoyingly, when travelling from Hamburg, you can only arrive hourly, at 48 minutes past each hour. So I was left with a choice: arrive to Wolterdingen at 08:48 and awkwardly wait outside the park for ages, but be one of the first through the gate...or arrive at the park late.
 
I expected the park to be quiet, so arriving late wouldn't be the end of the world, buttttttttt I like to get to parks for opening wherever possible. So I opted to get out of bed the hour earlier to get there earlier. Who needs a birthday lie in when there's creds to get?!
 
Getting from my hotel to Wolterdingen was straightforward enough. U-Bahn from hotel to Hamburg's main station. 20 minute wait time for connection to a random place called Buchholz, then a 15 minute wait to connect to Wolterdingen. Easy enough.
U-Bahn went smoothly. But then disaster struck. The connection was delayed...by 15 minutes. Ffs. The train pulled into Buchholz just as my connection left. And it was an hour until the next train.
 
I came to really hate Buchholz. It was a large station which was very windy and cold, and there was no indoor waiting area that I could find. Fortunately, the rest of the journey was easy enough, and the walk from Wolterdingen to Heide was a straight line, and only took me 15mins. And so, a little after 10, I was finally here!

 
Waltzing straight on through, with no whiff of security, my first port of call was the dump my stuff in a locker. I don't usually use park lockers (usually opting to visit light), but didn't fancy lugging all my stuff all day, especially with the ominous storm clouds hanging over. An all day, unlimited-entry locker cost 5 euro...not awful, but could be worse I guess.
 
Checking the app, it suggested that of the "big" rides, only Krake, Flug der Damonen and Big Loop were open. All with 0 minute queues, fortunately. But not a great start, and already cred anxiety was kicking in. But let's not focus on that, and instead let's get some B&M-goodness...

 
Krake wasn't particularly something that was on my radar. Drop, inversion, over, right? A fun +1, but I didn't expect any more. I was, however, pleasantly surprised. I walked on to front row straight away, and got a very nice ride. You seem to hang over the drop for a good few seconds (much longer than Oblivion and Baron at least), and the splash effect is really cool. The whole ride is filled with nice floaty moments, and even then those it's quick, it left me feeling fulfilled. Coupled in with the nice music and nice theming, I was quite happy. 


It's nothing special, but it does what it aims to do very well.
 
On an even more exciting note, I noticed whilst on ride that Colossos was running. And it looked like people were on it too! I checked the app and it said it was still closed. This left me with a choice...not head over and tick off the nearby creds, or trek to the other side of the park and see what's what. With Colossos being my most anticipated cred of the park, and with it's availability seemingly being sporadic over previous days, I decided to venture over. This turned out to be a very good choice; I saw it run again, and there were clearly people on it. Woohoo!
 
Colossos
Fortunately there was no queue, and even getting into the station, there was only a one train wait. The ride, like everything, was on one train, which gave me a good feeling about the level of busyness to expect. Opted for the back row for my first ride.
 
WOW.
 
I didn't really know what to expect from the ride. I hadn't heard much about it, and didn't know the layout. But having done Balder, I had high expectations for my second Intamin woodie. And damn, they were, pretty much, met. Climbing up the lift hill hearing the audio is a neat thing. The first drop is fantastic, lifting you out of your seat. The first airtime hill flings you out too. The second gives you nice really nice floater airtime too.
 
Then you hit the turnaround. This kills the ride a bit. It doesn't make anything bad, but it loses its ability to give decent airtime. You get little pops, but it feels weak compared to what you've just experienced. And this feeling carries on until the helix, where the ride picks up speed and its aggressive nature again. The final couple of hills have some good, consistent airtime, and leave the ride ending on a high note.
 
The "wicker monster", as I call it, looks really nice, and is a good first time effect on-ride as a near miss. It didn't have any fire effects going though, which was a shame.

 
After my first ride, I was itching to get on again. And with no queue, that's exactly what I did. In honesty, there's not many rides where I've had that immediate feeling of "Damn, let's do that again, like right now!"; it was very much a 'Top 10%' ride for me from the get-go. Taking advantage of there being no queue, I went for the front this time. I was surprised at how consistent the ride was compared between front and back. And the pure rush going down the first drop on the front row is something I really liked too.



Two rides in, and I decided - reluctantly - to move on. The park seemed like it was going to be quiet, but with the threats of storms still looming, I thought I should try to mop up the creds just in case, and then return to Colossos later if I could.
 
With that, I went to the neighbouring Desert Race. It's basically a Rita clone. I like Rita, so expected to like this. However, it fell a bit flat for me, for reasons I can't quiet put my figure on. Maybe the bare-ness of the ride? Maybe the slow ops, where they waited for an entire full train before dispatching? Maybe the annoying announcements? Just little fiddly things. This also feels like a very Tussauds investment: plonked down, minimal theming, very tacky in general. I hope the park do something with this sooner rather than later.
 
I then went back the way I came towards Big Loop

Bog standard old Vekoma. Not much else to say.
 
Then it was time to tick off the remaining B&M, Flug der Damonen. I had been intrigued by this, due to its tight layout and neat theming. Despite the app saying this had a 0 minute queue, there was a bit of a wait...about 10 minutes. No problem really though I guess. I really liked the station; had a real nice vibe to it.



I got a front row ride on the right hand side. And the ride...was not that good. It starts off nicely, standard B&M wing. But then it tries cramming all its elements into a small space, and it just seems to make the ride a bit juddery, and it lacks any sort of flow. A real shame, and definitely the weakest one I've done so far.
 
The app still listed Scream, Bobbahn and Limit as closed. These rides had all been closed any time I'd checked the app on previous days too. As they were nearby, I decided to check them out and see what's what. Scream had a sign outside saying it was waiting for a part, and should be ready to open for "Week 15". Sad times, as I like drop towers. Bobbahn had a sign outside saying it was too cold to open. Gah, spite
Limit, however, had no sign. It wasn't open, but there was a solid handful of people waiting outside, and staff in the station. I overheard a conversation between guests which I loosely managed to translate to as "it will open soon". So I decided to hang around.
 
To be honest, I can't believe I decided to willingly hang around and see if an SLC would open soon. Especially when it lunchtime, I was hungry, and I was in the same park as a walk-on Colossos. But heyho, a man's gotta get his creds. After about 10 minutes, it opened up. Yay...
I managed to get on the second train of the day. Second train of the season. I got a middle row seat, and braced myself in usual SLC-fashion. But something strange happened. It wasn't...awful. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't good. But it didn't try to massacre me, and I left the ride without my head feeling like I'd been in the ring with Drederick Tatum. Maybe the ride hadn't warmed up enough, so it was running slowly and, somehow, less rough?
So there we have it folks, if you want a not-awful ride on an SLC, make sure to take one of the first rides of the season on a cold and stormy day!

I also quite liked the music - nice rock track.
 
After a quick spot of lunch, I went to the other side of the park, where the water rides and a smaller cred lived. I did both the log flume - which had a long cattlepen queue you couldn't skip over thanks to Covid barriers still being in place - and the rapids in quick succession. They were nice; not too wet, not too dry, and solid, yet unremarkable, examples of their ride types. I ticked off kiddie cred, Indy-Blitz, too, getting a solo ride and a +1 for my troubles.
 
Next up was perhaps my second-most anticipated ride of the day...Ghostbuster 5D. I make no secret that I love shooting dark rides. I'm not big on the Ghostbusters franchise, but I acknowledged that it was something that had huge potential with this ride type. The exterior is very Merlin, in that it looks good in context of what the theme of the ride is, yet still a bit bland for a theme park. And it's kind of let down by the dodgy shipping container entrance. 



The mathematician in me feels obliged to take photos of any mathematical equations that work their way into theming within rides.
 
As for the ride itself...I dunno. I'm not sold. The idea is cool, especially the working together to take down ghosts. But the pacing feels a bit off. Some scenes are far too long, others far too short. There's not one which is 'just right'. There's not really anything between screens, and the attempted compensation is "let's spin and jerk the car around quickly". This left me feeling a bit motion sick, which was a shame. A bit better pacing in the scenes, and some better breathing space between scenes, and this would be SO much better.
 
On my way to the final cred, I took a nice slow wander round. On this random, meandering walk, I noticed a random fire effect, which was coming from the boat ride in the How to Train Your Dragon area. I don't particularly care for the franchise, but liking fire effects, I thought sod it, I'll give the ride a go. It was a nice little ride, with some neat effects and was largely indoors, protecting me from those pesky storm clouds (which were still threatening rain, but not following through!). Detour completed, I did the final open cred of the day, Grottenblitz, a Mack powered cred, with shared the same building as the previous boat ride. It had a nice layout. But I didn't get any photos (it was getting rather cold).
 
Now it must have been around 2 / half 2, and I'd ticked off all the creds and all the rides I wanted to do. Yes, there were loads of flats, but none appealed. The park have a monorail and train ride, which I would usually do, but both looked slow and burdensome to do in cold weather. So I took the chance to do re-rides, and a do a fair few of them at that.
 
Throughout the last couple of hours, I managed another two rides on Krake (on 2nd and 3rd row, both were nice, but not quite as good as the front, of course), and ride on the opposite side of Flug (which was even more juddery on the back row). I decided to give Ghostbusters another shot, but even being prepared for the spinning, I still felt a little queasy afterwards. More importantly, I managed another 6 goes on Colossos, including another front and back row ride. All in, it really cemented itself as a top ride for me. It had warmed up nicely, and the middle third was running better by the end of the day. Still a weak spot, but the first and final thirds more than compensated for it.
 
I also took the chance to just wander round the park and take some more photos. So here's a little final photo dump on my least terrible photos...





 
All in, I had a really nice day at Heide Park. The weather held off, the park was sufficiently quiet and it has a good selection of rides. It had quite a Merlin feel about it, and even moreso a feel of a park that's had three very different owners and directions. There's the older, classic rides which have a nice, integrated feeling. Then there's the Tussauds-era, plonking rides down and just rolling with it. Then the more recent Merlin-era, where theming and ride integration clearly plays a part, but can be a bit hit and miss. In saying that, I would happily go back again in the future - especially if they were to add a more traditional dark ride, and maybe replace Desert Race with something that uses the space better!
 
 
The day ended off by taking the train to Lubeck. It was a good couple of hours journey along 3 trains (Wolterdingen to the much-hated Buchholz, to Hamburg, then to Lubeck), but simple enough. Sadly, the weather decided to finally take a turn for the worse, and the heavens opened. The 20 minute walk up the hills of Lubeck felt so much longer thanks to the rain and bitter wind. Cheers for the birthday present, Lubeck...just what I always wanted!
 
Coming soon, day 2 of 2...a wet, cold and anxious day at Hansa Park...

As we approach the start of the 2022 season, I thought I'd do a few blog post ramblings on some nostalgic Thorpe memories I have.
 
Let's start off with Dr Pepper Sun Scream!
 

 
Launching way back in 2009 when Saw opened, Sun Scream ran every year for many summers at the park, bringing live music, silent discos, stunt displays, beatboxing, sideshows and festival vibes.
 
In reality, Sun Scream wasn't much in terms of an event, starting off as simply a stunt show and some yellow t-shirts for the rides staff, it evolved as the years went on and new things were tried, but I do have a lot of good memories from my annual mid-summer visits in the sunny weather!
 
 
The amazing Stunt Show
 
The standout feature of Sun Scream for me was the incredible stunt show in the Arena in the centre of the park.
This was one of the few times during the season that the Arena was actually used, but it was used well!
I remember sitting in the stands watching the Red Bull Stuntriders going over jumps and performing in the small area, and it was very impressive! I do remember one year one of the riders came off his motorbike during one of the performances, and was luckily ok, but the show was very good and (other than fright nights and Thorpe Blast) was probably the best 'show' the park has ever put on in my opinion, even in later years when it was replaced by a BMX display team.
 
 
Other activities
 
There were some less than ideal 'activities' as part of Sun Scream..
I distinctly remember a silent disco was tried one year in the Colossus queue line.
At a point early in the queue, everyone was offered a pair of wireless headphones which played music for everyone to jam to in the queue.
The thing is, in a typically British fashion, very few people actually took the headphones, and even fewer took part in the disco.
A nice idea, but didn't really work in reality.
I also remember several performances, like a beatboxer one year.. Again, nice idea, but the crowd in front of the stage (in front of X) never really grew to more than about 10 people at any time despite the best efforts of the staff pulling people in.
 
 
Late opening
 
One of the great things about Sun Scream was the 8PM closing time.
Being summer, this didn't really allow for night rides, but it was 'dusk' at least towards the end, and on the warm summer evenings it was great to stay late in the park after the crowds left.
This no doubt paved the way for the Summer Nights event that followed years later.
 
 
That 'Thorpe Park feeling' was at its strongest
 
I'm not sure about what it was about Thorpe in the 2009 - 2012 period, but for me that was when Thorpe was at its absolute best.
I always remember driving home from Thorpe, especially in the summer, with "that Thorpe Park feeling".
I can't describe it, but it's the feeling you get when you've had a great day, you're knackered, aching and have a fuzzy head, your hair is a mess, and you stink... But you can't wait to go back and do it all again, preferably tomorrow.
Sun Scream brought this feeling more than ever - it was such a positive and lively event, the sun was nearly always shining, the staff were lively and happy, and the park was always on top form.
We also had a new ride in Saw, and The Swarm was under construction. The park was alive in this period and at its best.
 
 
Dr Pepper
 
Dr Pepper was the sponsor for Sun Scream, and as such during the event the staff handed out free little Dr Pepper cans.
Because of this, I always associate the taste and smell of Dr Pepper with Thorpe Park, and every time I have it even all these years later, it takes me right back to "the good days" at Thorpe.
 
 
__________
 
Does anyone have any memories of Sun Scream?

As we approach the start of the 2022 season, I thought I'd do a few blog post ramblings on some nostalgic Thorpe memories I have.
 
I started off with Dr Pepper Sun Scream, now it's time for Brave it Alone back when it opened in 2013...
 
I have hazy memories about this, but recently I found an old post I made after I experienced it and thought I'd spruce it up a bit and share!
 
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
 
We did Cabin in the Woods way back on Sunday 13th October 2013, when the experience was brand new (and in my opinion at its best!)

So... Here's what happened!

After park closing at 10 pm, we met the Director, his assistant, and some park managers along with the other 'brave-it-aloners' at the bar area in Clypso BBQ, where we were read a very long and elaborate warning speech while having a drink.
We then had to sign an agreement that stated that 'you are prepared for anything to happen' and that 'TP takes no responsibility for anything', blah blah...

After around 20 minutes, when the guests had all left the park, the 10 or so of us were then given one of the classic "Don't wet yourself" ponchos to protect clothes from fake blood, dirt, facepaint and bodily fluids (yep, really).

We were then split up and were walked with a park manager to our chosen mazes, where we were asked further questions such as "are you aware that literally anything could happen in here", and "please you must tell us now if you have any reason to not experience this"... 
At this point the nerves were setting in - why did these warnings keep coming up? What on earth was going to happen inside?

After waiting outside the cabin door for a few moments listening to the actors inside, I stepped in to the cabin's first room, the one with the 4 doors, which was brightly lit. I was alone. Suddenly the lights turn off for a second, then back on, but now there are 2 actors standing right in my face!
Do any of you remember the guy who played Les Coogan back in 2011/2012? Well I had asked him if he's still known as Les Coogan earlier in the day, But I'll come back to that in a minute.
'Les' pushed me backwards in to a chair in the corner of the room, where I was screamed at and told of the horrors I was about to see. The chair was then tipped backwards and I was led on my back!
This was amazingly intense. The interrogation continued.
The actors were hillbillies of some sort, so there was... Umm... dribble.... lol!
I was then told to crawl in to the next room.

Here I was left alone with a single actor who after a while forced me to 'kiss the moose' on the wall, similar to the film. Interrogation went on for a couple of minutes, lights flashed on and off, the actor started getting crazy bouncing off the walls, when my friend crawled in to the room with an actor riding on his back! (I did laugh at this!) I snuck out in to the next room at this point...

This room had a person in a plain white mask, and was one of the most surreal parts. She forced me against a wall and slithered around me... very odd! The lights then went out, flashed back on, revealing her mask right up in my face. This happened a few times with her appearing and disappearing at different points.

I was then grabbed by another actor who looked panicked, saying "don't look, just get over here". He stood facing me and grabbed me by the shoulders, then pushed backwards (quite fast!) through several flaps and doors until my back banged against a wall!!

I was then pushed (very violently) back down on to the floor by a different actor, and told to continue onwards.

This next part is a blur to be honest, but I did a lot of walking, crawling, being pulled and pushed around, had lots of jump scares, until I reached the spinning tunnel, which had 2 female clowns inside...
Both clowns had 'penis shaped' balloons which they, errm, 'rubbed' me with in various ways... Yeah I'll leave that to your imagination...
They then taunted me with them and popped them in my ears.
One of the clowns then got behind me, wrapped herself around me and held me still, while the other licked my face and neck while the other laughed in my ear. This was very uncomfortable and weird!!! CLOWNS!?! All of this while the tunnel was spinning around me!

I can't remember what happened between here and the final room., however when I did reach the final room, the actor who played Les Coogan in previous years (remember from earlier?) stormed up to me, with about 5 other actors in tow! They each took hold of one of my limbs, picked me up and put me flat on my back on the floor.... 'Les' then completely went crazy!! They were dragging me around, and Les's final words to me were "DON'T YOU ****ING DARE CALL ME LES COOGAN AGAIN BOY. GET OUT OF HERE NOW." I was then pretty much forced to apologise to 'Les', and literally thrown in to a door leading out of the maze!

The look on the faces of the park staff was hilarious when I came out!  I particularly remember one of the managers looking genuinely worried!

It was absolutely fantastic and much more intense than I could have imagined. The whole experience lasted around 10 minutes. Worth every penny of the £15! Bargain.

I have probably missed bits here, and probably haven't done it justice, but you get the basic idea.

We then all made our way back from the various mazes and met back at the 'bar' in the BBQ, where we all had a good chat about it!
Some of the other guests had done Asylum, which was totally mad apparently. They were all drenched in fake blood, and said that many of the asylum patients were completely naked. Lots of 'adult' themes going on in there, including a performance in the bed scene which I'm not sure would hold up today.
Some of the others had done Saw Alive which was apparently amazing as well.
 
I can't describe how good Brave it Alone was in its first year! Genuinely terrifying to have literally ALL of the actors focusing on you the entire time.

As we approach the start of the 2022 season, I thought I'd do a few blog post ramblings on some nostalgic Thorpe memories I have.
 
I started off with Dr Pepper Sun Scream, now it's time for Brave it Alone back when it opened in 2013...
 
I have hazy memories about this, but recently I found an old post I made after I experienced it and thought I'd spruce it up a bit and share!
 
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
 
We did Cabin in the Woods way back on Sunday 13th October 2013, when the experience was brand new (and in my opinion at its best!)

So... Here's what happened!

After park closing at 10 pm, we met the Director, his assistant, and some park managers along with the other 'brave-it-aloners' at the bar area in Clypso BBQ, where we were read a very long and elaborate warning speech while having a drink.
We then had to sign an agreement that stated that 'you are prepared for anything to happen' and that 'TP takes no responsibility for anything', blah blah...

After around 20 minutes, when the guests had all left the park, the 10 or so of us were then given one of the classic "Don't wet yourself" ponchos to protect clothes from fake blood, dirt, facepaint and bodily fluids (yep, really).

We were then split up and were walked with a park manager to our chosen mazes, where we were asked further questions such as "are you aware that literally anything could happen in here", and "please you must tell us now if you have any reason to not experience this"... 
At this point the nerves were setting in - why did these warnings keep coming up? What on earth was going to happen inside?

After waiting outside the cabin door for a few moments listening to the actors inside, I stepped in to the cabin's first room, the one with the 4 doors, which was brightly lit. I was alone. Suddenly the lights turn off for a second, then back on, but now there are 2 actors standing right in my face!
Do any of you remember the guy who played Les Coogan back in 2011/2012? Well I had asked him if he's still known as Les Coogan earlier in the day, But I'll come back to that in a minute.
'Les' pushed me backwards in to a chair in the corner of the room, where I was screamed at and told of the horrors I was about to see. The chair was then tipped backwards and I was led on my back!
This was amazingly intense. The interrogation continued.
The actors were hillbillies of some sort, so there was... Umm... dribble.... lol!
I was then told to crawl in to the next room.

Here I was left alone with a single actor who after a while forced me to 'kiss the moose' on the wall, similar to the film. Interrogation went on for a couple of minutes, lights flashed on and off, the actor started getting crazy bouncing off the walls, when my friend crawled in to the room with an actor riding on his back! (I did laugh at this!) I snuck out in to the next room at this point...

This room had a person in a plain white mask, and was one of the most surreal parts. She forced me against a wall and slithered around me... very odd! The lights then went out, flashed back on, revealing her mask right up in my face. This happened a few times with her appearing and disappearing at different points.

I was then grabbed by another actor who looked panicked, saying "don't look, just get over here". He stood facing me and grabbed me by the shoulders, then pushed backwards (quite fast!) through several flaps and doors until my back banged against a wall!!

I was then pushed (very violently) back down on to the floor by a different actor, and told to continue onwards.

This next part is a blur to be honest, but I did a lot of walking, crawling, being pulled and pushed around, had lots of jump scares, until I reached the spinning tunnel, which had 2 female clowns inside...
Both clowns had 'penis shaped' balloons which they, errm, 'rubbed' me with in various ways... Yeah I'll leave that to your imagination...
They then taunted me with them and popped them in my ears.
One of the clowns then got behind me, wrapped herself around me and held me still, while the other licked my face and neck while the other laughed in my ear. This was very uncomfortable and weird!!! CLOWNS!?! All of this while the tunnel was spinning around me!

I can't remember what happened between here and the final room., however when I did reach the final room, the actor who played Les Coogan in previous years (remember from earlier?) stormed up to me, with about 5 other actors in tow! They each took hold of one of my limbs, picked me up and put me flat on my back on the floor.... 'Les' then completely went crazy!! They were dragging me around, and Les's final words to me were "DON'T YOU ****ING DARE CALL ME LES COOGAN AGAIN BOY. GET OUT OF HERE NOW." I was then pretty much forced to apologise to 'Les', and literally thrown in to a door leading out of the maze!

The look on the faces of the park staff was hilarious when I came out!  I particularly remember one of the managers looking genuinely worried!

It was absolutely fantastic and much more intense than I could have imagined. The whole experience lasted around 10 minutes. Worth every penny of the £15! Bargain.

I have probably missed bits here, and probably haven't done it justice, but you get the basic idea.

We then all made our way back from the various mazes and met back at the 'bar' in the BBQ, where we all had a good chat about it!
Some of the other guests had done Asylum, which was totally mad apparently. They were all drenched in fake blood, and said that many of the asylum patients were completely naked. Lots of 'adult' themes going on in there, including a performance in the bed scene which I'm not sure would hold up today.
Some of the others had done Saw Alive which was apparently amazing as well.
 
I can't describe how good Brave it Alone was in its first year! Genuinely terrifying to have literally ALL of the actors focusing on you the entire time.

As we approach the start of the 2022 season, I thought I'd do a few blog post ramblings on some nostalgic Thorpe memories I have.
 
I started off with Dr Pepper Sun Scream, now it's time for Brave it Alone back when it opened in 2013...
 
I have hazy memories about this, but recently I found an old post I made after I experienced it and thought I'd spruce it up a bit and share!
 
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
 
We did Cabin in the Woods way back on Sunday 13th October 2013, when the experience was brand new (and in my opinion at its best!)

So... Here's what happened!

After park closing at 10 pm, we met the Director, his assistant, and some park managers along with the other 'brave-it-aloners' at the bar area in Clypso BBQ, where we were read a very long and elaborate warning speech while having a drink.
We then had to sign an agreement that stated that 'you are prepared for anything to happen' and that 'TP takes no responsibility for anything', blah blah...

After around 20 minutes, when the guests had all left the park, the 10 or so of us were then given one of the classic "Don't wet yourself" ponchos to protect clothes from fake blood, dirt, facepaint and bodily fluids (yep, really).

We were then split up and were walked with a park manager to our chosen mazes, where we were asked further questions such as "are you aware that literally anything could happen in here", and "please you must tell us now if you have any reason to not experience this"... 
At this point the nerves were setting in - why did these warnings keep coming up? What on earth was going to happen inside?

After waiting outside the cabin door for a few moments listening to the actors inside, I stepped in to the cabin's first room, the one with the 4 doors, which was brightly lit. I was alone. Suddenly the lights turn off for a second, then back on, but now there are 2 actors standing right in my face!
Do any of you remember the guy who played Les Coogan back in 2011/2012? Well I had asked him if he's still known as Les Coogan earlier in the day, But I'll come back to that in a minute.
'Les' pushed me backwards in to a chair in the corner of the room, where I was screamed at and told of the horrors I was about to see. The chair was then tipped backwards and I was led on my back!
This was amazingly intense. The interrogation continued.
The actors were hillbillies of some sort, so there was... Umm... dribble.... lol!
I was then told to crawl in to the next room.

Here I was left alone with a single actor who after a while forced me to 'kiss the moose' on the wall, similar to the film. Interrogation went on for a couple of minutes, lights flashed on and off, the actor started getting crazy bouncing off the walls, when my friend crawled in to the room with an actor riding on his back! (I did laugh at this!) I snuck out in to the next room at this point...

This room had a person in a plain white mask, and was one of the most surreal parts. She forced me against a wall and slithered around me... very odd! The lights then went out, flashed back on, revealing her mask right up in my face. This happened a few times with her appearing and disappearing at different points.

I was then grabbed by another actor who looked panicked, saying "don't look, just get over here". He stood facing me and grabbed me by the shoulders, then pushed backwards (quite fast!) through several flaps and doors until my back banged against a wall!!

I was then pushed (very violently) back down on to the floor by a different actor, and told to continue onwards.

This next part is a blur to be honest, but I did a lot of walking, crawling, being pulled and pushed around, had lots of jump scares, until I reached the spinning tunnel, which had 2 female clowns inside...
Both clowns had 'penis shaped' balloons which they, errm, 'rubbed' me with in various ways... Yeah I'll leave that to your imagination...
They then taunted me with them and popped them in my ears.
One of the clowns then got behind me, wrapped herself around me and held me still, while the other licked my face and neck while the other laughed in my ear. This was very uncomfortable and weird!!! CLOWNS!?! All of this while the tunnel was spinning around me!

I can't remember what happened between here and the final room., however when I did reach the final room, the actor who played Les Coogan in previous years (remember from earlier?) stormed up to me, with about 5 other actors in tow! They each took hold of one of my limbs, picked me up and put me flat on my back on the floor.... 'Les' then completely went crazy!! They were dragging me around, and Les's final words to me were "DON'T YOU ****ING DARE CALL ME LES COOGAN AGAIN BOY. GET OUT OF HERE NOW." I was then pretty much forced to apologise to 'Les', and literally thrown in to a door leading out of the maze!

The look on the faces of the park staff was hilarious when I came out!  I particularly remember one of the managers looking genuinely worried!

It was absolutely fantastic and much more intense than I could have imagined. The whole experience lasted around 10 minutes. Worth every penny of the £15! Bargain.

I have probably missed bits here, and probably haven't done it justice, but you get the basic idea.

We then all made our way back from the various mazes and met back at the 'bar' in the BBQ, where we all had a good chat about it!
Some of the other guests had done Asylum, which was totally mad apparently. They were all drenched in fake blood, and said that many of the asylum patients were completely naked. Lots of 'adult' themes going on in there, including a performance in the bed scene which I'm not sure would hold up today.
Some of the others had done Saw Alive which was apparently amazing as well.
 
I can't describe how good Brave it Alone was in its first year! Genuinely terrifying to have literally ALL of the actors focusing on you the entire time.

Back in 2010 the first Harry Potter attraction opened at Universal Orlando and a single ride changed themed attractions forever. No longer were theme park fans really satisfied with cookie cutter themes with a hint of a story, immersion was now the name of the game. The area of Hogsmeade increased Islands of Adventure's attendance by 1.5 million guests, an astounding figure by any standard. Since the Harry Potter franchise has given birth to two further expansions and is now home in California and Beijing. 
 
But Universal isn't completely my bag. I prefer the Disney parks. Universal has so much dross like Jimmy Fallon, Kong and Fast and Furious. Those attractions just feel thrown in whilst every Disney attraction feels placed and fits in to its surroundings. Naturally Disney saw the success of the Wizarding World and went off first with the world of Pandora (and the guest favourite Flight of Passage) and secondly with Galaxy Edge. Now, I'd previously visited the Floridian version back in its opening week in 2019 and whilst I loved it, it felt like something was missing. Smugglers Run is great, the look is great but where was that top tier attraction? Rise of the Resistance was delayed due to technical issues with the attraction and would be opening later.
 
Looking back it was a mistake to open Galaxy's Edge without Rise. People put off visiting until it opened anyway and the area was seen as a failure for a while by the media. But now, with everything open and the world now able to visit, how exactly does Rise fit in.
 
This review will feature big spoilers for this ride. Scroll to the final paragraph for a summary with none of the spoilers.
 
 
 Rise of the Resistance puts you in the position of joining the Resistance and fighting against Kylo Ren and the new Empire. Unlike the rest of Batu which is basically a trading town,  Rise is set in an abandoned ruins with the queue taking place in small rocky corridors. The queue is long and mostly outdoors It commands a waiting time of an average of 100 minutes and is by the busiest ride in Disney World. We were fortunate and that it was open on time on one of our hotel extra hours times and over two trips we managed three rides. 
 
Once you hit the batching point you are assigned a room, I'm happy to call this the war room. Inside, BB8 greets you beeping away before being shooed away with a holographic Ray who tells you about the mission and welcomes you to the cause of the rebel alliance. The door opens and you are now outside with Poe's X-Wing and your transporter awaits in front of you. You board and the ship takes off. You leave the planet of Batu and it doesn't take long for some Tie fighters and a Star destroyer to appear and trap you in a tractor beam. The captain begs you to not reveal the rebel base to the First Order. Your ship is boarded and you leave from the day you came in from (I cannot tell you what an amazing effect this is, no video can do it justice. For all intents and purposes you have literally left the outside world and are now indoors on a space ship. It's outstanding). You are now prisoners and surrounding you are storm troopers, Tie fighters and droids. The group is escorted to the prison cells. where you are batched into interrogation groups. The cast members are outstanding, calling people scum and coming down hard on dissent. Think Nemesis Sub terra but with subtle acting and not unnecessary shouting. You enter your cell where Kylo Ren tells you how he will get the truth out of you personally. They leave and then a secret door is burnt through by the rebel alliance. Another great effect. You board your vehicle and the ride begins.

 
What begins is a tour de force of physical effects, screens and Disney firing on every single cylinder. R5 will be driving you to escape pods on the ship but this is a long journey and I probably won't do the ride justice with my words. To start off with your R5 needs to convince other vehicles that he is escorting prisoners. These are just the new ride vehicles going to the loading area but the story implies these are evil droids and I just found it so clever. 
 
 
You almost make it to pods when Storm Troopers appear and start firing at you. The vehicles head backwards and after two corridors enter a room full of AT-AT's. More storm troopers appear and Finn appears from behind some crates and urges R5 to take you down to the pods. Instead the lift takes you half way up the building and out into the control room of the Star destroyer. Kylo Ren and Hux are here, discussing the torture of the prisoners (ie Us). In front of them, rebel ships appear for the attack and Kylo turns around and sees us. He gives chase, first attempting to use the force to bring us back, luckily some doors close on him. We then head into a lift shaft but his light saber appears through the ceiling. We escape and head past some gun turrets firing at the rebel ships. These weren't working on our visit but they are supposed to move back and forth and your vehicle is supposed to move back and forth between them avoiding the gun fire. `You take a turn to the left and the rebels score a hit with the room being half destroyed. Around another corner and Kylo appears declaring your end. But we are in luck as another rebel hit reaches his target and it is implied Kylo is blown out of the ship. R5 takes you to the escape pods which works in the same way as a towers of terror lift shaft with a star tours motion simulator screen. You really feel like you've been jettisoned out of  a ship and are crash landing onto Batu. The Vehicle exists the pod and you are now back outside and have successfully defeated the First Order, hooray.
 
 
 
It wouldn't be an understatement to say this is one of the best dark rides ever created. Disney have taken all of their 65 years of theme park knowledge and it feels like everything has been put into this ride. I was mightily impressed by every trick in the book being used to create this attraction and the perfect integration of screen based media and physical effects to put on the show. It works incredibly well and it is a miracle that it works as well as it does. Back to my original point, Galaxy's Edge needed Rise because it is the main event, the reason people want to be in a Star Wars themed area. it is incredible. This is an attraction that on a first ride will shock you and surprise you consistently. And that is more then 99% of rides out there can ever hope to achieve.
 
A triumph in so many ways.
 
 

As we approach the start of the 2022 season, I thought I'd do a few blog post ramblings on some nostalgic Thorpe memories I have.
 
Let's start off with Dr Pepper Sun Scream!
 

 
Launching way back in 2009 when Saw opened, Sun Scream ran every year for many summers at the park, bringing live music, silent discos, stunt displays, beatboxing, sideshows and festival vibes.
 
In reality, Sun Scream wasn't much in terms of an event, starting off as simply a stunt show and some yellow t-shirts for the rides staff, it evolved as the years went on and new things were tried, but I do have a lot of good memories from my annual mid-summer visits in the sunny weather!
 
 
The amazing Stunt Show
 
The standout feature of Sun Scream for me was the incredible stunt show in the Arena in the centre of the park.
This was one of the few times during the season that the Arena was actually used, but it was used well!
I remember sitting in the stands watching the Red Bull Stuntriders going over jumps and performing in the small area, and it was very impressive! I do remember one year one of the riders came off his motorbike during one of the performances, and was luckily ok, but the show was very good and (other than fright nights and Thorpe Blast) was probably the best 'show' the park has ever put on in my opinion, even in later years when it was replaced by a BMX display team.
 
 
Other activities
 
There were some less than ideal 'activities' as part of Sun Scream..
I distinctly remember a silent disco was tried one year in the Colossus queue line.
At a point early in the queue, everyone was offered a pair of wireless headphones which played music for everyone to jam to in the queue.
The thing is, in a typically British fashion, very few people actually took the headphones, and even fewer took part in the disco.
A nice idea, but didn't really work in reality.
I also remember several performances, like a beatboxer one year.. Again, nice idea, but the crowd in front of the stage (in front of X) never really grew to more than about 10 people at any time despite the best efforts of the staff pulling people in.
 
 
Late opening
 
One of the great things about Sun Scream was the 8PM closing time.
Being summer, this didn't really allow for night rides, but it was 'dusk' at least towards the end, and on the warm summer evenings it was great to stay late in the park after the crowds left.
This no doubt paved the way for the Summer Nights event that followed years later.
 
 
That 'Thorpe Park feeling' was at its strongest
 
I'm not sure about what it was about Thorpe in the 2009 - 2012 period, but for me that was when Thorpe was at its absolute best.
I always remember driving home from Thorpe, especially in the summer, with "that Thorpe Park feeling".
I can't describe it, but it's the feeling you get when you've had a great day, you're knackered, aching and have a fuzzy head, your hair is a mess, and you stink... But you can't wait to go back and do it all again, preferably tomorrow.
Sun Scream brought this feeling more than ever - it was such a positive and lively event, the sun was nearly always shining, the staff were lively and happy, and the park was always on top form.
We also had a new ride in Saw, and The Swarm was under construction. The park was alive in this period and at its best.
 
 
Dr Pepper
 
Dr Pepper was the sponsor for Sun Scream, and as such during the event the staff handed out free little Dr Pepper cans.
Because of this, I always associate the taste and smell of Dr Pepper with Thorpe Park, and every time I have it even all these years later, it takes me right back to "the good days" at Thorpe.
 
 
__________
 
Does anyone have any memories of Sun Scream?

As we approach the start of the 2022 season, I thought I'd do a few blog post ramblings on some nostalgic Thorpe memories I have.
 
Let's start off with Dr Pepper Sun Scream!
 

 
Launching way back in 2009 when Saw opened, Sun Scream ran every year for many summers at the park, bringing live music, silent discos, stunt displays, beatboxing, sideshows and festival vibes.
 
In reality, Sun Scream wasn't much in terms of an event, starting off as simply a stunt show and some yellow t-shirts for the rides staff, it evolved as the years went on and new things were tried, but I do have a lot of good memories from my annual mid-summer visits in the sunny weather!
 
 
The amazing Stunt Show
 
The standout feature of Sun Scream for me was the incredible stunt show in the Arena in the centre of the park.
This was one of the few times during the season that the Arena was actually used, but it was used well!
I remember sitting in the stands watching the Red Bull Stuntriders going over jumps and performing in the small area, and it was very impressive! I do remember one year one of the riders came off his motorbike during one of the performances, and was luckily ok, but the show was very good and (other than fright nights and Thorpe Blast) was probably the best 'show' the park has ever put on in my opinion, even in later years when it was replaced by a BMX display team.
 
 
Other activities
 
There were some less than ideal 'activities' as part of Sun Scream..
I distinctly remember a silent disco was tried one year in the Colossus queue line.
At a point early in the queue, everyone was offered a pair of wireless headphones which played music for everyone to jam to in the queue.
The thing is, in a typically British fashion, very few people actually took the headphones, and even fewer took part in the disco.
A nice idea, but didn't really work in reality.
I also remember several performances, like a beatboxer one year.. Again, nice idea, but the crowd in front of the stage (in front of X) never really grew to more than about 10 people at any time despite the best efforts of the staff pulling people in.
 
 
Late opening
 
One of the great things about Sun Scream was the 8PM closing time.
Being summer, this didn't really allow for night rides, but it was 'dusk' at least towards the end, and on the warm summer evenings it was great to stay late in the park after the crowds left.
This no doubt paved the way for the Summer Nights event that followed years later.
 
 
That 'Thorpe Park feeling' was at its strongest
 
I'm not sure about what it was about Thorpe in the 2009 - 2012 period, but for me that was when Thorpe was at its absolute best.
I always remember driving home from Thorpe, especially in the summer, with "that Thorpe Park feeling".
I can't describe it, but it's the feeling you get when you've had a great day, you're knackered, aching and have a fuzzy head, your hair is a mess, and you stink... But you can't wait to go back and do it all again, preferably tomorrow.
Sun Scream brought this feeling more than ever - it was such a positive and lively event, the sun was nearly always shining, the staff were lively and happy, and the park was always on top form.
We also had a new ride in Saw, and The Swarm was under construction. The park was alive in this period and at its best.
 
 
Dr Pepper
 
Dr Pepper was the sponsor for Sun Scream, and as such during the event the staff handed out free little Dr Pepper cans.
Because of this, I always associate the taste and smell of Dr Pepper with Thorpe Park, and every time I have it even all these years later, it takes me right back to "the good days" at Thorpe.
 
 
__________
 
Does anyone have any memories of Sun Scream?

Unless you’ve been living under on a distant island  or on a galaxy far away,  you will be fully aware of the current  pandemic that is happening, causing for much concern and cancellation of next to everything fun, social or entertainment related.
  Whilst there are definitely bigger concerns out there, we probably won’t get our park fixes again now for at least a little while. This is why I’ve pitched up the idea of 10 Theme Park related things you can do and enjoy in the comfort of your own home whilst waiting for all this to blow over. Feel free to post your own suggestions too.   1/ Theme Park Video/Computer Games
The first (and possibly most obvious) thing to do when the parks aren’t open. There are plenty of theme park games, from the obvious Roller Coaster Tycoon Games and  Planet Coaster, to the slightly more obscure Theme Park World and Roller Coaster Factory, and even the whacky (yet wonderful) Legoland  games. Whilst we wait for this to blow over, enjoy your own fictional parks, simulations and creations!   2/ Watching YouTube Videos 
Again, another straight forward option. YouTube is literally a library for theme park videos, let alone everything else. You can watch literally anything, from Theme Park Worldwide, Jack Silkstone, Pleasure Beach Experience and many many others. Not a fan of these  or vloggers altogether? Then why not watch a POV of your favourite/bucket list coaster or that charming dark ride from Efteling? I know it’s not the same as visiting in person, but in the right ambience it can do the trick!   3/ Listening to your favourite park soundtrack or Album  Theme Parks don’t just give us great attractions and experiences, but they also give us some great music and playlists. Whether Imascore  you adore or snore, there are  lots of soundtracks to listen to and cherish in the comfort of your living room or bedroom. Belt out that Europa Suite or Villa Volta music from your sound system. Or if you prefer listen to the popular music playlists that usually echo  through those  amusement park entrances. In your living room. Not Coronation street please!   4/ Theme Park (related) construction toys 
Theme Park toys and gadgets are becoming more common these days. You have Lego Rollercoasters, nano- park building kits and other crazy contraptions that are based off, or at least resemble theme park related items. Definitely worth a shot.   5/ Watching Film/TV shows with theme parks in 
You could say I am just repeating point 2 again, but I say no. The difference between those are that those films and tv series use the parks essentially as film sets fo centre around or the development of the plot line. Whether that be that underwhelming time the Lampoons visited Six Flags Magic Mountain, that time the Spykids saves the day in Knotts Berry Farm or that time Will embarrassed everyone in the Inbetweeners? It’s all there Indeed and lots to see and adds even more amusement (no pun intended) to compare the accuracies and inaccuracies to how these parks actually operated in real.    Silly me, how did I not even mention Final Destination? Ok there you go.     6/ Reminiscing Old Park Trips  This one won’t be for everyone, especially if it triggers  serious park withdrawal symptoms, but nonetheless may still be something worth doing. Whether you’ve been worldwide, around Europe or generally stuck to just the U.K. parks, there must be that trip, that place or that visit that literally stuck out for you and gave you ever lasting memories.  For me, it has to be that first trip to Disneyland Paris back in 2015. I had never been so excited upon visiting a park before and felt simply overjoyed with everything about that trip, from an entertaining park group to some simply hilarious and magical laugh out loud memories both within and outside the parks. Wow! Five years.   7/ Looking at your merch collection 
Again this won’t be for everyone, but for most, there is surely some item that you have, or at least were  collecting at one point. Maps, pin badges, mugs, clothes or even shot glasses. I know this seems like a long shot, but it is these items that help with those connections to the parks and remind of us those wonderful visits we had there and hopefully will again one day too. I’m generally a resin person.   8/ Books from parks and attractions 
The title alone is rather vague I admit, but there are lots of park books and even articles to read right now. From park guides, brochures, theme park biographies and picture books too. Many have informative content which really go down into the depths of how parks and attractions cane to be. John Wardley’s biography is a strong personal recommendation!   9/ Act It Out!   Ok, I’m probably scraping the barrel a bit here and I can see most of you already acting confused as you read this. But if you can’t get down to those memorable attractions, bring those memorable attractions to you. Act it out! Dress up or style as your favourite park characters. Why not re-enact the Hex pre-show or Symbolica’s storyline? Ok, I just got the idea from this video, but it’s still pretty fun eye?    10/ Interacting with park mates and communities  Last but not least, but the most important thing of all, stay connected with your theme park mates and communities. It may all seem awkward being separated from next fo everyone right now, but you can stay together through virtual context. Drop messages, video chats and other means. Talk about your favourite rides, debate whether Helix is better than Taron (no fighting please), but more importantly, stay happy and well entertained in this challenging time for everything theme park and non theme park related.   Thank you for reading if you survived to the end. We are all in this together!   

Cyclone at Coney Island has been a bucket list ride for me since seeing it on a documentary called “The Ultimate Top 10 Thrill Rides” over 10 years ago.  At the time I had recently visited Blackpool for the first time(s) and with the memories of the coasters there fresh in my mind, it seemed so exciting that I could one day travel out to America and ride this famous coaster.
 
Arriving at Coney Island and seeing the ride in person was surreal, I never thought I’d actually get to be there standing in front of it.
 
Having heard lots of contrasting things (some people calling it rough, some saying it’s much smoother now etc) I wasn’t really sure what to expect, but my word… this thing is incredible.
 
Firstly, the operations were fantastic.  The ride hardly built up a queue because it was taking around 20-30 seconds to get people on and dispatch the train.  It was amazing watching staff hurrying people onto the train and rushing around to get it sent, very different to over here.
 
The ride has kept its old-style trains, braking system and still has the character of an old wooden coaster (rather than being “modernised”) which brought back lots of memories of old style PB.  The trains were very padded and the lap-bar had to go down very tight in some rows, whilst leaving us with room for airtime in others.  One thing that struck me was how well maintained it was, there wasn’t one bump in the track and the ride ran absolutely relentlessly.
 
The first drop provides some incredible floater airtime towards the back, whilst the slam into the next corner was amazing in the front.  There was lots of unexpected airtime throughout the layout, however the biggest surprise for me was the force generated by some of the turns; especially towards the end of the ride.  It's just a brilliant classic wooden coaster and even after 11 rides on it, I came back into the station grinning from ear to ear each time.  Also, night rides on it were amazing.
 
Cyclone is incredible.  If you like old-style wooden coasters, go and ride it!
 
Luna Park
 
The rest of Luna Park was fun; despite the other coasters not being the best, the park had a fantastic amusement park atmosphere and we were lucky enough to get to speak with the Coney Island History Project who were immensely proud of the Cyclone and the history of the park.
 
Thunderbolt is the worst roller coaster I have ever ridden, the Volare seemed nice in comparison.  The way it forces your shoulders onto those straps when you reach an inversion, the awful trimmed first drop (again forcing you painfully into the restraint), the rattle (forcing you into the restraint) … just AWFUL.
 
I enjoyed the flat rides and overall park atmosphere, the fact it was open until midnight too was incredible.  The wristband provided us with good value at $48 online, bearing in mind that Cyclone would have cost $10 per ride using the park's token system.  It's 100% worth visiting for Cyclone alone but we made good use of the wristbands on most of the rides.
 
Ridecount:
 
Cyclone x11
Thunderbolt x2
Soaring Eagle x1
Astro Tower x1
Steeplechase (not that type of steeplechase unfortunately!) x1
Booster x1
The Tickler x1
Circus Coaster x1
Wild River x1

This year May not be over yet but it has been one long roller coaster ride and sadly not an enjoyable one other . As this horrible time remains  dominated by a  never ending pandemic, here’s some rides that may be a reminder and summarisation of how 2020 is going. Hold on tight and remain seated, you are in for a very bumpy ride!
1/ Meanstreak- Cedar Point  Tall, long and dominating. The whole presence of this attraction should deliver something great to live up to it’s name. Sadly that is not the case. This coaster uncomfortably drags you along a rough and uncomfortable circuit which proves to become more and more uncomfortable as experience more of the ride. It seems to never end and go on and on without end. You are relieved when you finally get off, but the physical recovery is long and winding. Not to mention the whiplash will still be with you during whatever you decide to ride next.    Sadly there is no RMC conversation at the end of this year!   2/ Temple Of The Nighthawk- Phantasialand  On a personal level, comparing  2020 to the last few years of my life is a bit like visiting Phantasialand and going from riding Taron and Chiapas to experiencing the park’s infamous indoor coaster, Temple Of The Nighthawk.    This coaster takes up a large footprint of what isn’t a massive park, sticks out like a sore thumb and greatly clashes with much of the other amazing offering. It’s a long slow paced attraction taking you on a long and mundane layout through forceless twists and turns in the dark. You don’t know where you are going yet it lacks any sense of any excitement or direction. Not to mention three waves’ I mean lift hills to endure also.   Many want this gone and to be ripped out, but that’s unlikely to happen for a while given the building’s mixed usage and complexities. So like many negative things, the Nighthawk is currently here to stay without it’s demise in sight. 
  3/Most Pinifari Coasters Rough, bumpy,uncomfortable and generally unreliable, the perfect candidate to what is a disappointing year it has been. Yet despite this these coasters are still scattered around countless parks both large and small, with several years yet before they head into the big headache in the sky!
4/ Fairy Tale Castle Liseberg Though it was removed a few years ago, this weird and random attraction epitomises 2020 given how bizarre it has all been. One moment we would see a cardboard Peter Pan fighting a cheap Captain Hook, followed by a fat “trumpesque” like emperor figure. All whilst listening to the “ripped” Droomvlucht music playing. It should be amicably pleasant, but fails this in countless areas leading to something memorable for the wrong reasons perhaps.   5/ Son Of Beast Just like 2020, Son Of Beast had the intention of delivering greatness just from it’s  name, however became proned with problems and something of a massive write off, as far as success goes. The Beast should’ve been something spectacular and lived up to its predecessor but it just didn’t. It was painful to pretty much everyone who did it and was met with more positives than negatives when it met it’s demise. This year will be the same bar Rhona sadly continuing. 
6/ Saw The Ride- Thorpe Park Saw is a torturous coaster, 2020 is a tortuous year! Likewise they both begin with something of a hopeful prospect but this is ruined to plummeting down hill with a series of jolts, bumps and many moments of discomfort. Sure there was that brief moment of an airtime hill towards the middle, but in general this is followed by more pain and discomfort until it is suddenly over. The headache afterwards lasts even longer.

  7/  Hero- Flamingo Land You are seated uncomfortably when you go up the spiral lift. You know you are in for a bad experience when it’s already rough and shaky already. The ride essentially sees you ride through a poorly profiled track and layout whilst locked down in your torture vehicle wishing it to end sooner rather than later. When it’s finally over you will have no intention to talk about your experience ever again!     This year hasn’t been fun for sure. What rides make you think of 2020? 
  I don’t own the pictures.

As part of the 2-4-1 deal TPM was given for the new VIP experiences, a group of us went down to go behind the scenes and ascend 127 feet.
We began our day going into Stealth's bunker where the launch system sits. The size of it is ridiculous! There are a few photos of Inatamin accelerator hydraulic systems around the internet but they don't do it justice! It also makes the coolest noise ever when it launches unfortunately, no picture were allowed down here so here's one of everyone's favourite Stealth element.

I also really like this photo

Next we headed up to the console where we saw people press buttons and how the system registers where a train is at any one time. For anyone who loves codes, Code Bronze is where it doesn't launch (because the dog is out of the 3mm tolerance on the 3 tonne catch car), Code Silver is a rollback and Code Gold is a stall at the top of the ride.

We were however allowed out onto the platform thingy of the station to take pictures



Yes, we also got to wear fancy hi-vis jackets alongside our steel toe capped boats.

Still amazes me that this thing is 3 tonnes!
We then headed under the station to watch a launch and here the dog fall into the catchcar (that's what the lovely ping noise it makes while moving back and forth before launch is) and then down the metal path to the warehouse.






In the workshop we were lucky to see one of the trains that is operational this season (don't ask me why it was in there and not operational, surprisingly that wasn't a question that came to mind). In here we saw them drop the dog and realised how little actually touches the catchcar to launch it. There was also a cannibalised train which they rebuild over the season so over winter they only have to strip down one train as the other is done during the season. We were then meant to head to Saw but we overran at Stealth (2 hours we were there for ) so were given The Swarm's workshop before our lift hill walk.

Wee!

With 10 of us around this hatch taking pictures, people soon began to wave and shout at us

We waited around for it to close and then watched the magical transfer table move!

Although it may look slow, you have to remember it's carrying a ridiculously heavy train and it is moving as fast as possible as this was requested by the park and B&M set it to the fastest safest speed.
The track locks into place

We all ran away


And in it came!
Like other B&Ms, the wheel bogeys are left completely open making it easy to inspect and change without having to move the train (like you have to on those wretched Intamin rides) so the train runs on a set of wheel in the middle and two rails where a slot between the seat runs along.

And out we went

To the control booth

Sun setting

To ascend this!



Still going


Higher

And we made it

And what a view it is!






Quick panoramic of the park

And it was time to come down
Few things, the park went to B&M and asked how they'd go about making it backwards. They considered alternating rows, one whole train backwards and the other forwards and in the end when with what we have due to the queueing situation. B&M supplied four new chassis for it and they do still have the other four for when it went forwards so it may return but for now it will remain as it is as it's still proving popular. The engineers do try and keep the theming in working condition and even want to replace the sign as its peeling away but budgets say other things and it's not always possible for them to fix effects such as the water spray and fire as their job is to get the ride operational and often by the time they've done that it's open and they can't get to the effects. The gas tower was also mentioned and they are looking into bringing back the fire especially with ABL now open but again budget and time says otherwise.
Was a great day and the view from Swarm's lift is amazing!

Goodnight Swarm.

In 2012, I was assigned to write a feature for Colossus's tenth birthday. The article itself was my best work if I don't say so myself. It was my intention that I would be able to do a similar piece when it came to 2003's blisteringly hot but underwhelmingly* tepid Nemesis Inferno in 2013. But this did not happen. No matter what I wrote, constructed or thought about, inspiration abandoned me and I just couldn't put together a piece that would do Inferno justice. And the problem comes down to one sticking point;
There is just nothing special about Nemesis Inferno.

Nemesis Inferno, distinctly middle of the road.
But worry not fellow Thorpe fanboys and coaster nerds for the story doesn't end there. It is for that reason that for me, Nemesis Inferno is one of Thorpe's very best roller coasters and one that I get the most pleasure out of riding during a visit. Let me tell you a tale about a ride that was hyped to the max, but could never reach those lofty heights.
Back in 2002, Colossus had done unexpected things for Thorpe, it's visitor numbers rising and rising and the construction of a brand new Inverter would have been a spectacular thing indeed for English enthusiasts. Remember, we are talking about a time when Nemesis most definitely ruled the roost in the UK and unless you were up for travelling to America, Italy or Spain, chances are it was your only shot. The hype surrounding Inferno was definitely something different, particularly when it was associated with the Nemesis name. I can remember at the time, discussion on Inferno's finale helixes being discussed as potentially as intense as Nemesis's helix after its first inversion. Talk about building the hype.

Of course, come April 2003, Inferno opens and it isn't quite as good as it's predecessor. My favourite description at the time was a ride on Inferno's front row was not as intense as a ride on the Happy Halibuts of Octopus Garden. Talk about damning a product.
At the time, with only Colossus complimenting Inferno, it came under harsher criticism then it probably deserved. With only two major roller coasters** to keep customers happy, Inferno came under the limelight in a way that many rides do not. After all, inverters had really boomed in the 90's with the Batman clones being installed all across America and rides that dominated their respected parks like Katun, Montu and Alpengeist. By 2003, with new types of rides starting to dominate such as sky hogging mega coasters and Intamin's brand new launch technology breaking record after record it's easy to see why Inferno was not enough and why Inferno could actually be seen as a bit, old hat.

This is all hindsight of course. With the addition of Stealth, Saw: The Ride and The Swarm, things have increasingly changed at Thorpe and of course, so has Nemesis Inferno. As higher, faster and more attention grabbing rides have been added, Inferno has become more of a support roller coaster. When everything else goes to hell in a hand basket, Inferno is the old reliable. Always the ride with minimal queues, always the ride that eats through queues like it's going out of fashion and always the ride that delivers a smooth, intense experience. Never really pushing its customers too far but always delivering its promise of an enjoyable and satisfying ride. I know there are those that will disagree. A B&M inverter should be the absolute pinnacle of intensity, nothing should be considered more when riding this ride type. If that is the promise then Inferno doesn't deliver. Luckily, just up the M1 and left a bit is another roller coaster that does fulfil the necessary criteria.

At Thorpe however is a ride built on the tail end of a coaster boom, one that is loved by a small but vocal minority. And for me personally, it holds some very special memories. It was my very first B&M and by default my first B&M inverter, it was the first ride that I really followed construction of and I know full well that it is my most ridden ride thanks to many Single rider sessions in 2004.
More then most then, I can say that Inferno is an average ride at best. But even average is better then the majority of roller coasters out there. And that's good enough for me.
Thanks for reading, Mark9

*I made up a word just for this review. Now that is dedication for you
**I know people will say X:/ No Way Out was a major roller coaster. it just isn't OKAY!

Day 1
What better way to spend the UK closed season than by visiting a park that doesn’t close? Goodbye depressing Merlin situations and hello Efteling, who certainly are the opposite end of the ownership scale, what with being owned by a non-for-profit organisation who happily throw €42 million on a show.
So a blustery Saturday morning greeted us, with a flight to remember as the winds took hold of our plane throughout, providing an intense experience I never wish to repeat again in my life. But fortunately the flight was short and Rotterdam was reached (just). A bus to the train station, a train to Tilburg and another bus (Total of about 90 minutes travel time, especially if you get the connections right), and we had reached our destination of the Efteling Hotel!



We got our park tickets and through the super secret mini-gate we were in, greeted by a DJ Set-up in front of our first coaster, Vogel Rok. This Vekoma indoor variant is hidden behind a fantastic entrance background and a giant animatronic bird welcoming you into his giant building. A short indoor queue led us into the station and the cattlepen of death (Efteling LOVE hidden cattlepens of death, fortunately we used none of them), and before long we were sat on the ridiculously spacious seats (pros of lap-bars of OTSRs on a Vekoma, given the way Space Mountain at DLP is), and sent off into the pitch black.


The ride itself is fun, with a few laser effects and animatronics dotted around as you swoop around the building accompanied by some fantastic music. Very re-rideable (as we found out during the ERT sessions for hotel guests), and probably the smoothest Vekoma I’ve ever ridden. Solid ride and a solid start for Efteling.
7/10


Next door was our first dark ride in Carnival Festival, which is a Small World rip-off in Omnimover form. A really fascinating dark ride; and something that seems to be an institution in Efteling as Bubbleworks once was to Chessington. Catchy theme music, bright colours, moving sets/animatronics, this ride has it all, even some good old-fashioned racism (bless Continental Europe) fill this tour of the world up, from Holland to France (complete with prostitute), London, Japan and Africa; certainly a classic example of a classic style dark ride.











Moving on from the area in search of other coasters, we wandered through the park to the opposite corner, taking in the lovely setting of lakes and woodland, before arriving at our second Vekoma, Python.


In classic Vekoma white and green, this ride is famous for THAT incident where during an evacuation on the lift hill the train suddenly moved forward due to the unloading procedure. Since then though, it’s had the new Vekoma trains added on with a sexy looking vinyl finish to it.

The new trains help this ride a lot though, whilst not as smooth as Vogel, it was certainly the best Vekoma looping thing I’ve been on in a while. Can all of the existing ones have these trains please? A decent helix finale too, but an amazingly bland layout cannot be held up by such an alright finish.
6/10

Efteling have a coaster corner, with Python, Flying Dutchman (closed for off-season maintenance during our visit, so didn’t get to ride it), and Joris en de Draak, the racing GCIs.


At the end of last year I thought Stampida was the best example of a well designed (at least, initially) racing style coaster, however, Joris has taken over that mantle exceedingly well, with a layout that is atypical of GCI, and adding in a finish that is often tighter than Merlin’s purse-strings. Even added onto that is the return of the trains to the station; where the winner returns to unfurling banners and cheers, whilst the loser trots in afterwards to boos and jeers. Simple additions that would be deemed as unnecessary in certain parks, but not here; and obviously capped off by a giant animatronic dragon that breathes fire.



The choices here are Water and Fire, and generally they don’t differ that much until after the journey back over the station. With the usual array of quick turns, airtime dips and near-misses, it was hard to determine which of the two was preferred to the other. Water tends to gain some lead, but the finale removes that as it goes on a longer journey around the lake next door, where Fire holds back into tighter turns and drops (arguable holding the best drop of both as it dives under the lift hills). In the end they are both excellent coasters, and certainly with the 1.1m restriction they fit into Efteling immensely well. I also get the feeling that Europa were inspired by it slightly, as the swampy queue-line looked very familiar.
9/10




We continued our circuit around the park, walking the long way around due to the mass of construction happening at the Rapids, ending next at the final coaster of the trip, Bob, the Intamin Bobsleigh. I remember enjoying Disaster Transport before Cedar Point spited it so I was looking forward to riding another one. An enjoyable romp through the woods followed, with some surprisingly large drops and some fair amount of lateral Gs. Part of me thinks that these single car versions are better than Mack’s multiple car trains, mainly down to the speed this one achieved, but Avalanche at Blackpool is similar. Oh well, either way, a solid enough ride.
7/10

How to refurb your ride 101


Pictures of Bob are extremely difficult
We were hungry at this point, so food was required, and there was a place I had been told (read, ordered) to eat at, Polle’s Keuchen. A pancake place of sheer and utter deliciousness that you so rarely see in a theme park. Heavily themed with a central feature that spun in time to music, open cooking area, waiter service and a bar, all for one little pancake place? Truly, this is the stuff of rare legend.






After stuffing ourselves full of pancake goodness, a dark ride was required, so step forward Fata Morgana, Efteling’s answer to Pirates of the Caribbean. From an unassuming queueline of relative blandness around the loading platform, into one of the most well themed dark rides I’ve seen. It uses the tow boat system to its complete advantage, making the scenes feel a lot more involving of the rider for the majority, yet still managed to pull off the impressive large set pieces off as well. Plus some excellent bonus effects were used throughout it.
I’ve never been so surprised by a dark ride since Gardaland’s pirate effort, but this is another level. This is truly Disney level dark ride goodness, which resulted in me sitting in awe of the entire thing.



Yay for random park entertainment!
We had a quick look at the main entrance building (House of the 5 Senses, the most impressive park entrance architecturally speaking) before moving along to the opposite corner of the park again, home to 3 of Efteling’s well-known attractions (unfortunately Ravelijn, the €42 million show, was closed, but the outside of it looks incredible).




From one amazing dark ride, to another, this time Dreamflight, an inverted dark ride with an extremely bland cattlepen queue of death (apparently it was once actually themed and didn’t use a side-door) and a station that shared its locale with a café (a very weird one there Efteling), so not the most enticing of starts.


Then the ride begins. And after the impressiveness of Fata Morgana, this continued the theme, I was once again blown away by the details, multiple animated characters, the size of the set pieces, and of course the infamous coaster-like finale. It had recently had a bit of a refurb, which did show, but still, my first ride of it, full of the unknown led to even more jaw-dropping moments as gigantic set-pieces revealed themselves. Again, this was some Disney level stuff going on, if not vastly superior.







This photo is blurry because it’s the coaster section

After a second go on Dreamflight, it was time for another famous one in Villa Volta, the first Vekoma Madhouse. Said to be one of the best ones, it unfortunately suffers from the same issues as the rest, dialogue heavy story-telling. Granted, most Madhouse stories are reduced to “The place is cursed”, but the interesting part is always, “Why is the place cursed?” “Why did the Earl lock up a branch?” “Why is there a Pervy Wizard?” all important questions that rarely get answered if you don’t speak the local lingo.
Villa Volta’s first room is an exceptionally bad example of this, as the dialogue comes from speakers in the roof, so you have nothing but people talking about the feared Goat-Riders. The next room improves slightly with the addition of Hugo, the main character and his fabulous animatronic (again, Disney standard), but it still involves a LOT of dialogue. Hex is probably the only Madhouse which manages to get the balance right, as the first pre-show has the accompanying video to tell the story, and the second show has minimal dialogue and is obvious as to what is happening.
The ride room though is beautifully themed, and a slightly different (and more forceful) ride cycle to go with it. The music is another feather in the bow of the ride, with another catchy theme which fits the ride perfectly. I would easily say Hex is a better overall product that Volta, but that’s not to say it is bad, indeed, it’s better than its Italian cousins and Feng Ju Palace. But the dialogue is the issue more than the ride itself.


Projection Mapping screens live here



We had some time to kill so we wandered around to the Laaf Village and did their Monorail thing, which was alright, a very required sit-down attraction. Another go on Vogel Rok followed as we were nearby before walking back to the park entrance for Aquanura, Efteling’s answer to World of Colour, only without projections and just pure fountain action so amazing Amanda Thompson would never leave it alone.
Set to various classical music and some of the park’s own music (Villa Volta, Ravelijn, Carnival Festival), it really is a fantastic show, though the wind at this point was problematic and got us extremely wet in the “Optimal Viewing Area”. Nowhere near as bad as watching Disney Dreams in a blizzard that’s for certain, but the timing, colours and various fountain type (and FIRE, because it makes everything better) worked together to create an entertaining spectacle.




And that was it for the first day, finding an empty park was not what I was expecting, as was getting every major ride done in a few hours. But we still had 2 whole days, and a Fairytale Forest to visit, so we checked into the hotel, had a nice meal and looked forward to another day of pancakes.

In this final instalment of my Florida adventure we look at 3 parks in the dark, SeaWorld, Universal Studios and Island's of Adventure.

So let's begin!

With SeaWorld's beautiful tree!

Because it's Christmas!

So even the lake was full of trees!

There was an ice rink

Red SkyTower

A Christmas train set

Decorations

Mythical beasts

Penguins

Another tree

And fountains!
So SeaWorld is beautiful at night especially with Kraken and Manta!

And welcome to Universal Studios!

Where the minions were lit up!

A concert under Rockit

Lit up Optimus

Their Christmas tree

Water screens

With minions, lasers and fireworks!

Bye bye Studios

Here we come Islands!

Where the Discovery Centre lit up the lake

Suess was bright as ever

With one fish

And a cat

Down in Hogsmeade Dragons were challenging

And the lake was glowing!

One of the best area entrances got better!

With night time adventures

And the Discovery Centre up close

A Lagoon of Toon!

Home to Dudley

Popeye

And partying dogs

But watch out

(terrible image) Doctor Doom is about!

But so is Spidey! We're safe again

Watch out

It's not going to work

The Hulk.
And that concludes my Florida adventure. I hope you've enjoyed reading all my entries

Our penultimate instalment takes us to what has become my favourite theme park...

Welcome to Universal Studios Florida!


What will this chapter of our adventure have in store I wonder?

The Cat in the Hat shall enlighten us!

Let's start back...

To the Future

Now home to Jebediah

Lard Lad

And Clumsy Wigum!

Watch out for Kang and Kudos though! They'll put you in a spin

And make you a bit Tipsy

Or Sirly.

DuffMan doesn't care though

As long as you buy Duff!

And then treat yourself to a Krusty Burger thanks too

Krusty himself!

Moving on we have

Men In Black!

Which really isn't a disaster (even though some peoples scores were!)

Something tells me the Amity retheme has gone a bit overboard...

Christmas Tree was Rocking out over the Christmas period!

Really it's a massive grey shed.

Hiding a red train.

Time for a musical interlude

Not enough?

Have some Blues Brothers as well!

Warning Civilians, your help is needed!

E7 Error!

E7!!

Optimus Prime needs your help (or just wants whatever he is pointing at, probably a dink)

We were called away from the music to try and stop a doll?

This I can understand, but really, a doll?!

Of course not, this was the Horror Makeup Show!

What's this?

Hop?

Ohhh, the film about a bunny!

Garfield didn't want candy so instead

This was actually due to Macy's parade. The All Star Parade didn't happen while we were there so every half hour one of the 4 floats/routines would come out and do a performance followed by a meet and greet. The 4 acts were Hop, Despicable Me, Dora, and SpongeBob! On our first day it was a huge surprise but a great one at that!

Shrek 4D

And to conclude let's talk about in my opinion an overly underrated ride (or highly criticised for flaws that have been resolved/improved)

Hollywood

Rip

Ride

Rockit!


This element is great, really pushes you out of your seat and a great high speed change in direction!
It's a fun ride which has massively improved since I rode it in 2009!
Opinions are free and everyone is entitled to their own but these are mine.

And this Twister of events brings us to the end.
A little write up on two things before I finish.
Transformers: Using the same technology as Spiderman this is a brilliant dark ride and is much more screen based than Spidey (that's why I prefer Spiderman over it) but it certainly feels much more involved at times with the riders being a key role to the story.
Despicable Me: The ride basis is exactly the same as Jimmy Neutron but just a much more complete experience with more pre shows and guest interaction. And MINIONS! Enough said.
So thanks again for reading and we hope to see you one more time!

This latest instalment even has adventure in the name, welcome to Islands of Adventure!
Let's take it one island at a time!

And let us start in the wacky world of Suess!

Which home to one fish, no two fish, are they red fish or blue fish though?

And an exceedingly unique carousel!
Moving on from Suess we enter the Lost Continent! Which now feels even more lost.




Sinbad, a decent show when you ignore the construction going on behind it.

Now time to enter the place many will be wanting to see...

The Wizardring World of Harry Potter!




This actually moves!

And the first challenge, Dragon Challenge!



Champions you are ready for battle good luck!


Hagrid's hut!

With a Hippogriff!

And the masterpiece of the whole area

Forbidden Journey!

Yes it is a massive shed behind but up front it is sure impressive!


Bye bye Hogsmeade

And hello Jurassic Park!

Home to

DINOSAURS

Of course


And this beautiful view!


Wonder what happens here?

This happens!

Moving on

Toon Lagoon!


Best water ride I have been on.


And last but not least, Marvel SuperHero Island!


And The Hulk!!!




A view from Port of Entry

And the car park concludes this chapter! Don't worry, more photos of Islands will be appearing in the night time photo edition! But until then, thanks for reading and join us again at Universal Studios!

Today we venture to the bright world of Lego, now in Florida!

The entrance area is lovely and open and fresh, much better than Windsor's.

Must be a thing to have dinosaurs at the entrance to LEGOLAND's.

And some Lego tourists.

Once again it was apparently Christmas time, still didn't feel like it.

We begin the journey in their newest land, World of Chima!




It's a heavily themed splash battle which I'm sure to any viewers of Chima would make loads of sense! But even to someone who hasn't ever seen Chima, the story was clear and effects very good. The only thing it lacked was interaction with the effects because all day you would be the only one on the ride so didn't have anyone to "battle."

Knight's Kingdom was up next

Home to the Dragon


And one of the jousting rides, which we were too tall for.

Land of Adventure!

The whole Egyptian theme works much better in the Florida sun

And Dinosaurs!

As a wooden coaster!


Lego City with this very impressive Lego Ford!

And Flying School

An awful Vekoma.

So moving on swiftly


Jungle Coaster!

I mean Project X!

Pirate Ski Show!

And now to relive a bit of history.



I know they have to keep this by the State Law I think but I'm still very impressed with the upkeep they have put into these gardens.

Not even the crazy rabbit is allowed in!

Time for a look at Miniland.







Trust Merlin.


I really liked LEGOLAND Florida and I really hope it is a success. It has got everything apart from a log flume which surprises me, but it is still a beautiful tranquil park like it was when it was Cypress Gardens. Time for another break before we head over to Islands of Adventure. So sit back and have some lunch until next time.

Welcome to part 2 of my Florida adventure at...

Busch Gardens!

What a beautiful day it was

So let's leap into the action!

And begin the day with

Gwazi!
I know many people detest this ride, but I love it! Yes it's a bit rough, but for me it is still a thrilling enjoyable ride! For me it will be a shame if it goes.
]
The death of Gwazi is not yet confirmed but for Timbuktu it sure is.

Glad Scorpion isn't leaving though, it is a good fun ride.

Up on The SkyRide we saw a hippo,

Some flamingos

And a Cheetah hunting!

But before all of that, the Congo is calling with the mighty Kumba roar!


Kumba is one of the most highly rated B&M's out there and deservedly, but it doesn't have massive theming pieces which people seem to love at the moment. It is just perfectly styled as the above picture shows, whilst there is no direct theming it is a themed or well styled ride. It just works.

Montu is the opposite, it is heavily themed.

But also fits in. Another great example of how to do a roller coaster well.

This Hyena is tired of rides for now though, so we will take an animal break.








Hang on, that's not an animal! Guess it's ride time again!


Can you do this Oblivion? No. No you can't.


After a quick cool off from the heat it was time for Busch Gardens latest addition...


It is such a beautiful looking ride. The green and yellow combination is great!



It is a great family coaster! Has the punch of an Intamin launch, silky smooth, fast paced ride with some excellent pops of airtime and speedy changes in direction. Can't compare it to Maverik but this is certainly great fun!

And away they go!

It may not look it but it was Christmas time...

This sign says so!

This brings us to the end of our 2nd adventure! Next up is a world of Lego and gardens, so from me and the meerkats we will see you there!

Here it is - the 2013 Review of the Thorpe Park season! I'll be sticking to a similar formulaic approach as the 2011 (sorry about the pictures being broken here; I'll be sorting it out asap!) and the 2012 Season Reviews I've done. If anyone has any suggestions on how to improve the style / format of it all, let me know! Sorry about the length of this; it's hard to a balance between a detailed review and keeping it short. Also, for anyone wondering, I won't be doing any for other parks, simply due to the fact I haven't visited them enough to do a 'season review' like this one. Watch this space though - who knows what the next season will bring for me? And so, with that out of the way, in the words of Thorpe Movie Studios' Director, "get ready to roll...lights, camera, action!"
The Swarm
We all know the story now - an alien race has attacked Thorpe Park, leaving destruction in its path. Unfortunately, this didn't bring in the guests last season - maybe the park's marketing was too effective and people actually thought real aliens had invaded? So, the thrill factor of the ride was upped - giving us the billboard and the 2 backwards rows. The general consensus is that, simply put, the billboard is a great addition, which is visually pleasing on and off ride, and creates what many regard as the best near miss of the ride. So Thorpe really hit the nail on the head there.
The backwards rows, however, have divided opinion a lot more. It certainly creates a unique and interesting experience, but it does detract from the 'point' of Swarm. That said, it still is a crowd pleaser, so it's not all bad. The main problem which seems to have arose from it is that of the station queue are being congested, and loading procedures sometimes being affected because of it. I noticed towards the end of the season, the backwards passes were scrapped in favour of just going backwards after seeing the queue size, so maybe that's the way forward? (Pun NOT intended!) I also see that Heide Park's wing coaster is having bag storage in the station area, so if that works out, I'd love to see that implemented for Swarm to solve the problem of the crowded bag area.
All in all, Swarm's touch ups this year are welcome to all, keeping a great ride experience and improving it with more large-scale theming.

The billboard, featuring the winning competition slogan.

The reverse of the billboard.

Swarm is still one of, if not, the, most photogenic rides on park.
X
Another 'New for 2013', though not heavily advertised, was the rethemed X. Finally, after closed season upon closed season of rumours that it would be given attention, the rumours were true! Forward facing trains, individual lap bars, a lowered height restriction, a vague theme, lights, music all in one - it added up to a whole lot of potential for what was likely a cheap-ish retheme. Now, my first go on the new X happened when the block brakes were still on the ride. It created a slow, boring and unenergetic ride which was a shadow of its older self in my opinion. Being a fan of X:\ No Way Out, it was hard for me to see how the park could successfully improve it.
However, my goes after that were without the block brakes. And the ride got better. And better. And better...you get the picture. I love it now. Everything about it just works; it's just a fun little ride which everyone can enjoy, and was something that was really missing in Thorpe's line up. As someone who remain sceptical over an overhaul of the ride, I'm really glad it's worked out and given the ride a new lease of life!
Nemesis Inferno
In 2003, the public felt the heat of Nemesis Inferno for the first time. 10 years later, and the fire is getting hotter and hotter! Inferno ran brilliantly this year, giving a faster and more relentless ride than ever before. It just goes the show that even B&M Inverters which are seen as 'boring' or 'unforceful' can still grow into something which can pack a punch. The tunnel's effects were a bit hit and miss, yes, but for the most part, I think they've been pretty good this season.
What speaks more volume about Inferno than I could ever say, though, is what I saw back on a cold, snowy April's day this season. The park wasn't busy at all, and rides had a maximum of a 5 minute queue, with 5 minute queues. Inferno, however, had a consistent 20-30 minute queue throughout the day, not because of slow loading procedures or anything, but simply because it was pulling in the crowds. Goes to show you don't need some amazing gimmick to create a coaster which will keep people coming back...

Inferno on a sunny day.

Inferno on its 10th birthday (look at that queue!)
The Other Thrill Rides
In a season where the park has aimed to slightly shift its target market so it's not all about thrills, the park's thrill rides themselves have had some mixed fortunes.
Stealth has had a pretty successful season, with no major breakdowns coming to light. It's nice to see a ride which was previously having a few troubles here and there be continually running smoothly. I love how the park use the ride's plaza area for loads of small little things, like Dr Pepper stuff and the ice cream event, making it feel like it is not only the 'icon' ride of the park, but also the icon area. Also, the Ice Cream event photoshoot was massive fun - 20+ rides on Stealth on a summer morning is always a great way to wake!
Colossus and Saw, known as the two rough rides on park, have also had decent seasons. Whilst Colossus is no longer the coaster with the most inversions in the world (or even the UK; thanks Smiler...), it's still got the 'world's first' to draw people in. It needs a spruce up, yes, but hopefully that will come sooner rather than later - after all, the park themselves have said they're keen on the idea when the time is right! Saw is a very Marmite ride; most people seem to have a strong dislike for it, whereas a few have a soft spot for it. I'm in the minority who enjoy it and feel that this season has been alright for the ride. Effects have been good on the whole, and I still don't think the ride is rough. If I have one criticism of the ride, though, it is that the outdoor audio is broken / turned off / too quiet to hear (I have no idea which); really would like to see that rectified.
Slammer started off the season really well (if anyone had been asked to place a bet on it working throughout days of snow, most people would likely have kept their money...), but it unfortunately hit its snag around the half way point of the season. It's a shame to see a ride which is having so much time and money invested having so many problems (and, as far as I'm aware, it's not reoccurring problems, it's usually a different problem each time). Hopefully 2014 will be 'the season' where it manages to be pretty much problem-free as you do wonder how many more long periods of downtime the ride has to have before the park say enough.
Slammer's S&S brother, Rush, has remained pretty consistent during the season, which is good news. It's been a bit of a shame to have shorter ride cycles this season compared to other seasons, but I assume there's a reason behind this. Detonator and it's shiny new restraints has been brilliant as ever; always gives you 'that feeling', and never fails to deliver. Vortex has been feeling very 'juddering' this season though, which has lead to an experience which makes me feel rather queasy unfortunately. Fingers crossed that this closed season will see the ride given a little bit more TLC.

Samurai also had a bit of trouble this season.

Detonator stands tall as the park's most consistently good flat ride.
The Water Rides
With the charge in target market becoming obvious just before summer time, the park's water rides played a bigger role than normal this time around. For a park the size of Thorpe, I think 5 water rides is a on the larger side, so why shouldn't the park put them in the limelight a bit more?
The season began with everyone fearing that the removal of Loggers Leap's tunnel would ruin the ride. Fortunately, not all of the tunnel was removed, and the ride experience isn't really affected by it at all. Of course, this is no reason for the park not to replace the tunnel, as I bet for first timers, the indoor lift is somewhat of a surprise. Other than that, Loggers has remained on good form for the most part, though seemed to struggle a bit towards the end of season. Also, the smell after the tunnel seems to have gone away / become less potent; if that's the park's doing, then yay!
Rumba Rapids is a ride high on my list (maybe top) to get a bit of attention. It doesn't need too much, a bit of work inside the tunnel, a fresh lick of paint and hey presto, it's pretty much done. The thing is, even though it's a short ride, rapids rides are the perfect ride for everyone and can work on any level. Tidal Wave is a ride I don't do, but it still looks as striking and wet as ever, so no complaints! Depth Charge's new boats are presumably heavier, as I've found boats to go faster and further, which is great fun.
As for Storm Surge, well...I'll let you fill in the gap here for yourself...

Tidal Wave...operating in the snow.


A variety of TPM members show off their Storm Surge reactions...
All the Rest
Not much else to say really about the other rides. It was nice, but a bit strange actually, to see the Teacups be repainted with the Tetley branding half way through the season - goes to show that they are working towards a good look for the park. Other rides like Quantum and Zodiac were doing as well as ever I felt, and rides like Rocky Express and Flying Fish were nice fillers which will no doubt become more popular as the family market builds all the more.

A blank Teacups midway through the season.

Despite supposedly closing at around 5pm for Fright Nights, Rocky Express stayed open much longer. Perhaps there's more demand for the ride than the park realised!
Thorpe Park Mash Up
Mash Up ran for a second year, again in conjunction with Ministry of Sound. The fact that the previous couple of Easter events only lasted one season must say that the name and style of Mash Up was appealing. Unfortunately, I didn't go to the event this season, but I expect it was much the same as last season's, which worked well, so no problems there!
Sun Scream and Dr Pepper
Sun Scream returned for what I think was its fifth season, and was again sponsored by Dr Pepper. The more family-friendly direction the park were heading saw no stunt show, but instead a 'chill zone' take the arena, sand-sculpting be in the smaller half of Neptune's Beach and other things for everyone to enjoy. Then there was the Dr Pepper red button roaming around the park long after Sun Scream had finished, giving everyone the chance to win prizes if the dared to press the ominous red button. Good to see random little fun things like this crop about.
Despite Sun Scream obviously being popular enough to last many seasons, I think it's time to think of something a little different now. It's all feeling a bit tired and overused now; just a slight change in direction and couple of other tweaks with give it a fresher feel which I think is needed.

Sand sculpting on the beach.


The Colossus sculpture was highly detailed.

The Chill Zone was very different to the usual bike stunt show which would take over the arena.

The Red Button.
Smaller Events
There's been a fair few smaller / one-off evening events this year, no doubt to help encourage people to make use of the other evening things the park does (keeping Bar 360 open till 11pm for example; great idea!) and to give something extra for Crash Pad guests. These included comedians working their way up, roller disco nights, lesser-known groups such as 'Please..?' and 'Anttix' playing in the dome and others.
It's nice to see the park experimenting and trying to get crowds in for longer / for other reasons than 'just the rides'. In honesty, I doubt these were huge successes, due to the lack of marketing they got, and that people probably weren't drawn to smaller names. However, the park shouldn't give up with them - they need to stick it out with things like this, find what works and what doesn't. Yes, it's a bit of a risk, but that's what the park need to do!
Summer Nights
A surprise feature of the season was Summer Nights - 7 roller coasters and 2 water rides open for 3 hours for a small charge. Okay, at first the park were wanting to charge what was probably a bit too much (£18 for non-AP holders, £15 for AP holders), it was great to see Thorpe respond to the criticism and swiftly lower prices. The park was very quiet for all of the nights it ran (the first night being essentially dead and there literally being no queues). It was great to be in the park with such a relaxed atmosphere, and the staff were clearing enjoying themselves as well. Everything about the event worked so well.
The true testament to the quality of the event is that the park are doing it again next season, for pretty much every weekend during summer!
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Queue free indeed.

A literally empty left hand side of Swarm's station area.
Fright Nights
Two words - Intellectual Properties. These are what dominated this season's Fright Nights, and will do for at least the next two. IPs are tricky things to pull off at theme parks, but I think that the risks involved with pairing up with Lionsgate paid off.
Some may say that the IPs have ruined the mazes, but I think that isn't the case. Cabin in the Woods was a brilliant and unique idea, which worked brilliantly. Blair Witch Project was something different to the rest of the park's line up, and even though it didn't live up to expectations, it's a good learning curve for the park. Also, considering it was a 2* rated attraction, it really isn't that bad. Saw Alive remains a strong maze in the line up and the idea if the You're Next characters roaming the park was very clever. The only weak spot was My Bloody Valentine, which was a shadow of the original Experiment 10.
I expect we'll see at least 1 or 2 replacements next season (or maybe even a completely new line up bar Saw; who knows?), so the event should continue to grow in its own way. The way to improve the event from here is for park-wide theming; the park has got the mazes more or less sorted, they've got lighting and audio done rather well. To create an event which can start to compete with the best, theming the park is essential, and with Fright Nights being the crowning glory of the park's season, let's hope they can continue to go all out!
The highlight of the event, for me, has to be Face it Alone. By far the most extreme experience possible, well worth the money and exactly what the park needed to add to create this 'terrifying Fright Nights' which they claim. This really should return next season, as it is certainly a great experience.


Small theming pieces were around the park; specifically by the mazes.

The roaming actors caused quite a crowd when they were around.
Reserve 'n' Ride
Another experimental thing for 2013 was Reserve n Ride. A free-to-use service which replaced Swarm's main queue for about a week and a bit all in all. The overall idea of it seems very optimistic - turning the park into a queue-free environment, because you can book the time you want to ride.
The system worked to be fair. However, there are some problems, such as having to rely on having a smartphone with a decent battery life, and people understanding how the system works. The idea of making the park queue free is highly ambitious, but this might be a suitable replacement for Fastrack in some respects. Again, it's great to see the park trying out totally different things, and it will be interesting to see if this develops further next season.

When it worked, there were no queues in sight.
Food, Drink and Merchandise
Back before the season began, many were wondering if the outsides brands would be leaving the park, especially with the Burger Kitchen outlets arriving at Alton Towers and Chessington. Fortunately (based on reviews of BK at the parks), all outside brands stayed and no new food outlets came to the park in 2013.
All food outlets have continued to serve good quality, and the prices remain good value for what you get (which are made really rather good if you have can take advantage of Annual Pass discount). The only shame about drinks is, for a period of time, some outlets wouldn't refill the quenchers. Seems really odd, just doesn't make any sense (apart from for outside brands, of course). I did notice that during parts of the season, they became more relaxed about it all, which was pretty good.
A quick word on merchandise too. It's been great stuff yet again and of decent value too. Swarm's merchandise is still beautiful!

Amity Drop n Shop got a new sign!

Enjoying amazing kebabs.
Nature
It's no secret that there's not an awful lot of green space around the park. It's all too easy to forgot that the park is surrounding by water, which is actually a really beautiful setting when you think about it. So here's a couple of photos showing off the little bits of natural beauty that is around the park...

Sunken Gardens towards the beginning of the season...

...and in the middle of the season.

Swans and their babies by Swarm. They ain't afraid of no aliens.
Other Stuff
Just a couple of other bits as well. We've seen new LED signs outside ride entrances come about this season, which are good quality and much more inviting than the previous ones. If there wad one criticism (which is quite a picky one too), it would be that all of them say 'WELCOME TO THORPE PARK' every so often, which seems a bit pointless really. Having it on the large queue boards, fine, but on the individual ride ones is a bit excessive.
Also, one thing I noticed on Summer Nights, when all the audio was the same all around the park, some of the speakers were a few seconds out of sync. I don't know if it was a one off or if that's now been sorted, but if it hasn't, then I'd like to see that fixed up. It's such a small thing really, but it makes a world of difference.
Speaking of audio, 'The Noise' was a great idea, and something which was well executed. It will be interesting to see if they stick with a similar idea next year, or go back to a themed entrance music piece.
A Look Ahead
2014 brings us the rebranded Crash Pad, aka 'The Waterfront Hotel'. Thorpe are creating their own shipping container hotel, with brighter colours and more rooms available. It will be interesting to see if there's a change in quality or price now there's no ties with Snoozebox, but that's only something time will tell. From reviews that I've heard this year, The Crash Pad was actually nice inside, despite the unpleasing exterior, so maybe it's one of those things which will get more popular as word of mouth spreads?
Other than that, we have no concrete announcements of anything new next year. There's been talks of a new 4D film, the return of the Canada Creek Railway, the movement of Vengeance to the park and others, but will any of it happen? If the change in target market to be a bit more family friendly becomes more prominent, then at least one of those things should happen. Thorpe have alluded to a spruce up of the entrance as well, which is much needed in my opinion. Other than that, I expect we'll see a couple of spruce ups around the park, as there are a couple of rides in need of a bit of tender loving care. Whilst it will be a quiet year for the park investment-wise, it doesn't mean that there won't loads of interesting little things come the new season!
So that's it for another season - onwards and upwards as they say. Thanks for reading!

So we come to the end of what has been a rather disappointing year in the UK (there’s no two ways about that) it was up to the park’s abroad to show us how to do things, and that is something they most certainly did.
United Kingdom
I didn’t actually visit any non-Merlin UK parks this year, I nearly made it to Mingoland but fortunately that didn’t pan out.
The additions to the Merlin parks sounded good (at least if you weren’t Thorpe, who seemingly cannot think of suitably well thought out additions when not building a roller coaster), with Zufari being inspired from one of the most engaging Disney rides, and Smiler’s secretive and fantastic advertising showing that when they put their minds to it our parks can advertise things properly. But what went wrong?
Alton Towers
This one is clear, Smiler was both the best and worst thing about this year for Towers. The positives are simple, it is the biggest ride that has been built in the country for years, it captured the imagination of the public, it is a marvel of engineering/construction, the advertising was going well, it clearly boosted the park attendances upon opening. It was what people wanted.
Unfortunately, whoever Towers hired to build the thing probably appeared on that BBC show that sort out dodgy companies in a previous life. The list is longer than the Ultimate of what went wrong, the primary issues surrounding the ground it was built on being surveyed incorrectly which meant they had to delay half the construction in order to concrete the ride it properly. Then of course the winter decided to throw snow onto the matter, delaying it further. Subsidence, flooding, storms, incorrect placement of track, aligning issues, etc. were also major influences on the ride’s construction. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a ride construction be so flawed and have so many external issues added on.

One of the few track pieces inserted correctly...
Then of course, the ride opened, then closed, then opened again, then threw bolts at people. Gerstlauer’s biggest project became the world’s biggest pain, which is a real shame because the ride itself is fantastic (although still the 3rd best ride on the park), but the rushed construction, poor planning and awful contractors will be this ride’s legacy, in amongst the countless breakdowns and the like.
Elsewhere on park, it was a weird situation, as Smiler made the park rather top-heavy in investment. Constant other issues like storms, poor ride reliability and powercuts meant that the park didn’t particularly have good PR for the season (see also the July Smiler breakdown which wasn’t communicated until about 3 days before it re-opened). However, what has been a shining light this year has been the entertainments department, which involved the fantastic pirate show with Roger Ramrod, the new Park Keepers who eventually got a vehicle to tour in, the Orchestra in the Summer; a relatively decent array of stuff for Halloween and the Fireworks. For our parks, where shows are particularly high on the agenda, these were a real joy to see happen; and easily the best part of the year for Towers. I hope that this continues on into the future more than anything.

Fantastic ride, a legacy of issues...
Chessington
Where does one begin? Zufari ended up being a cluster of good ideas badly executed in the worst possible way. Bunnygate. Runaway Train was SBNO all season. Dragon Falls lost its theming. Rameses died. Vampire’s operations got worse somehow. Across the board the park was quite simply, dreadful, and will probably see a very low attendance figure this season (more than usual at any rate).

Just when you thought Chessie couldn't get any worse... 2013 happened...
The Halloween event was probably the best week of their season, and even then the not-so-late openings and general park issues couldn’t be ignored. Most of the theming was non-existant based on previous years attempts. Their two mazes were excellent value for their minimal budget though, with Hocus Pocus Hall’s refurb being a complete surprise. However, that cannot skim over the fact that the park has easily been the worst one this year, and with nothing to look forward to next year (though this can be brought to all Merlin parks, though Towers will get LOTS of guests next year), I simply cannot get excited for it.
Thorpe
In a strange turn of events, the park that did nothing of real value (Mraws is still a poorly designed gimmick and X really isn’t that special) did the most by doing what they should’ve been doing for years. Expanding the social network side and using it to their full potential, whilst creating new events (some which worked well, some which didn’t, Summer Nights variated beyond belief as to the quality of the event, although popularity was non-existant, which isn’t the best indicator of the worthiness of an event from the park’s POV) and just generally keeping a decent improved profile this year.

This was the Ice Scream event...
Will it improve matters completely? It’s hard to tell, as currently the park’s portfolio of rides and attempt at a new direction are very much at odds at each other whilst they also have to get rid of the old image of unreliable rides (which Slammer doesn’t help), long queues and Fastrack over-selling on a regular basis. The two former issues still exist on the park, even with the random attempt at complete Virtual Queuing for Swarm, which still seemed to have plenty of teething problems.
Fright Nights apparently existed, although that wasn’t particularly clear even when visiting the park during it advertised (the second time of the year an advertised event didn’t exist, Ice Scream I’m looking at you). The park-wide theme amounted to a CAD entrance sign, film music and the same announcement on every ride with Detonator being the only modified version. The roaming actors were very good though, both sets (Director and You’re Next), but it just didn’t feel like there was an event going on, which is very disappointing when the park was calling it “the UK’s answer to HHN”, that has plenty of theming on the park, Thorpe did not.
Apparently the mazes were good (or not so good, opinions varied across the board for both Thorpe and Towers’ attempts), although my experience of Blair Witch Project was simply diabolical. Fortunately for it Walibi’s Zombie River exists, which was worse, but not by much.

Thorpe let me know in no uncertain terms that my feedback is always appreciated...
PR aside, the park has advanced to doing the basic minimum I want from our parks. But they made a lot more effort this year to improve the guest interaction and issues, which can only be considered a good thing. Just hope that this extends further in Thorpe’s DNA and also to the other parks.
Legoland
Legoland still exists for some reason. Miniland is an absolute TIP and needs fixing up as standard. Elsewhere it’s still the usual meh place really with nothing spectacular going on. It really needs a decent new ride in there. Well themed high throughput coaster preferably, but currently I do wonder why I bothered going at all. Still, not that worst park of the season.
In another post, I’ll look at all the International parks I visited. Check back soon.

2013 has not been the grandest years for theme parks in the country, more like a cheap table wine that you pick up for cheap at Tescos. From obvious budget cuts and rides standing but not operating for an entire year at Chessington too The Smiler trying to throw everything and the kitchen sink at passers by, it is clear that the Uk industry has stagnated somewhat in 2013.

And yet, shockingly and surprisingly, despite not adding anything substantial, Thorpe Park has come out as the clear winner by a long shot. From much better reliability park wide, to improvement in effects up-keep and new events, the park has clearly embraced social media and openly interacts with guests more frequently. This all in turn with a slight shift in target audience, Thorpe has the potential to be the park of 2014 as well if it can keep the ball rolling with ideas that are fresh and innovative.

So where did this begin? Ah, I know, March time. I had booked a whole week off of work so that I could visit Thorpe for its opening weekend, take a look at how The Smiler construction was going and have a go on Zufari whilst enjoying old family favourites such as Runaway Train, Dragon Falls and Vampire. It wasn't to be. A refurbishment list made itself apparent, a lot of these rides were not to be open due to the park not able to maintain rides for a quarter of a century and Zufari was postponed by a week. No matter. As temperatures continued to drop, three successive trips to Thorpe occurred, one for the Swarm media photo day with Thorpe Park Mania, one before a meet weekend and another on what was to be the coldest trip of the season. On all three days, somehow, Slammer worked continuously, we even had a ride in the snow which is pretty surreal, I'm sure not many could say they've done that. Despite the freezing temperatures, the only rides closed all day were Colossus and Saw. A Trip to Chessington could have given you a ride on Bubbleworks and Tomb Blaster if you were really lucky. Alton also impressed during March, the emptiest I had ever seen it. Surprising sights such as only two people on Air at 4 in the afternoon is very different to the usual sights.
May
New Coasters - 142. Wodan - Europa Park

With the sun out, birds singing and all but one ride open at Chessington (for now), it was back with my theme park shoes and off on holiday. Instead of staying with the UK, it was back off the Europe for my favourite theme park so far. Europa Park is an utter joy to be had. Even though we spent three and a half days there it just isn't enough to fully embrace the joy of a theme park that is run professionally and efficiently with show after show, ride after ride and a park that has full pride in everything it provides for its guests. Ride highlights included Blue Fire being as good if not better then I remembered, the wonderful Euro-Mir and the very impressive, relentless Wodan. We stayed in the sublime Bell Rock resort and scored Eurovision one night, toured the hotel the other and had a delicious cocktail on our final night. Thursday night it was back off to England for a days rest and then onto the next trip, Denmark.

New Coasters:- Dæmonen - Tivoli Gardens
Odin Express - Tivoli Gardens
The Caravan - Tivoli Gardens
Rustcherbanan - Tivoli Gardens
Vandorm - Bon Bon Land
Vild Svinet - Bon Bon Land
Hunderprutterutchebane - Bon Bon Land
Tornado - Bakken
Rustchebanan - Bakken
Mine Train Ulven - Bakken
Racing - Bakken
Vilde Maus - Bakken
Mairehønen - Bakken
Piraten - Djurs Sommerland
Skatteøen - Djurs Sommerland
Karlo’s Taxi - Djurs Sommerland
Thors Hammer - Djurs Sommerland
Juvelen - Djurs Sommerland
Jungle X-Plorer - Legoland Billund
X-Treme Racers - Legoland Billund
Dragen - Legoland Billund
Timber Ride - Legoland Billund
Lynet - Farup Sommerland
Mine Expressen - Farup Sommerland
Flagermusen - Farup Sommerland
Pindsvinet - Farup Sommlernad
Falken - Farup Sommerland


On our arrival it was a sweltering 16 degrees (hot for Denmark) but throughout the week, the weather would fly up and down. It is a very odd climate indeed. We spent the first night celebrating Denmark's win of Eurovision and throughout the week we would hear that music blasting out of car windows. We even got to see the winning act perform live at Tivoli. The major highlights off the trip were the first Rustcherbanan at Tivoli Gardens, which is a truly wonderful attraction and deserves to be appreciated for its sheer beauty and smoothness, Piraten and Juvelen at Djurs Sommerland which were equal in the fun and thrill stakes, Polar XPlorer at Legoland Billund was a very fun ride, as was Lynet at Farup Sommerland. With the good comes the bad and Bakken was truly atrocious with the diabolical Tornado symbolising everything I think wrong with the modern day Intamin company. Not enough refining, too much trying to please a park on a sub-standard product. The Rustcherbanan at Bakken had also been seriously ruined by KumbaK with magnetic breaks destroying any element of momentum that the ride tries to build.
I left Denmark feeling very sad, it is a wonderful country, if not for its coasters then for its feeling of freedom, liberty and forward thinking Danes.
June
New Coasters - 170: The Smiler - Alton Towers

And after what felt like a life time of waiting, The Smiler finally got itself going and very swiftly, a trip was planned with my non coaster friend. The Smiler is a great ride. Ok, so it can't upstage Nemesis or Oblivion but I still maintain it is a great ride with a bit of a kick in it especially towards the end. You could say I've been lucky, every time I've visited, it has been open and whilst seeing break downs galore whenever I enter the queue, I've always been fortunate enough to ride. Even with it throwing bits off quite frequently. For my 25th birthday, it was off to Thorpe where I got my last ride on Slammer before its annual four month closure. It was a beautifully sunny day with minimal queues. And still it wasn't my best trip to Thorpe this season.. but that is coming. Shortly after my birthday, spent a weekend at Towers for some Smiler loving. The end of the month saw the Inferno ERT even for TPM members where we got to walk through some of the ride area and some lucky pups got to have a little walk up the lift hill.
July
This was a relatively quiet month with a solitary trip to Alton Towers where yet again a substantial ride count was halted by the troublesome Smiler eating up so much of the day.
August
Now this was the trip of the season. Thorpe hosting its summer late night events. I know some got rained on and the organisation is not as strong as it could be. But during my trip I can safely say I had the best Thorpe I've had for some time. The park was busy enough during the day but with the later hours, I got a chance to properly relax and appreciate my time there. With the joyous hot weather as well, it didn't feel like a theme park in the UK with rubbish weather and even worse opening hours. It felt like I was in sunny Florida or Italy with some great friends from TPM. I came away pretty blown away by how great the trip was, testament to how much Thorpe has grown and increased in confidence during the season.
September
New Coasters -
Space Mountain: Mission 2 - Disneyland Parc
Big Thunder Mountain Railroad - Disneyland Parc
Indianna Jone et le Temple du Perile - Dienyland Parc
Casey Jr - Disneyland Paris
Crushs Coaster - Disneyland Paris
Rock ‘N’ Rollercoaster - Disneyland Paris
RC Racer - Disneyland Paris
Tami Tami - PortAventura



And so with the weather starting to deteriorate it was off to Disneyland Paris, a place I have never been before. I did enjoy it and found it far more relaxing and stress free then the pressure kitchen that is Disney World. It helped that the parks were very quiet with 5 minute queues on Space Mountain, Thunder Mountain and Tower of Terror being seen throughout the visit. Dreams was a real highlight, seriously great entertainment and needs to be seen by as many as possible. The final trip, two weeks later was PortAventura which unbeknown to me was the start of its Halloween events. Now, I really don't like Halloween events. I know they are extremely popular but I don't find them scary in the slightest despite the actors best efforts. For me, the important thing for the trip was to get my ride on Tami Tami and to fully enjoy Shambhala and Dragon Khan. Which I certainly did, getting more then my fill on both these coasters. Baco, lived up to its awful reputation, set last year but maintained fully in 2013. Is it worse then Tornado? They are both awful and nasty.

My year was finished off with a Fright Night finish at Thorpe. I don't do mazes but with it being quiet during night, it was nice to get a few night rides on Inferno, Stealth and front row Colossus.
​And with that the year off theme parks is over. 2013 was not a great year for the UK admittedly. So much potential completely left untapped with Smiler not being as reliable as required and Chessington letting down every single guest that walked through its doors with its sheer incompetence. I used to be a major Chessington fan but frankly its no longer worth the effort. Full of low capacity rides that are either falling apart, closed or so low on staff that it takes five minutes to load a boat. Hence my lack of visit in 2013.

Here's to a full on 2014 for everyone and thanks for reading (if you did).

With the weather looking okay, the only chance I'd get to visit this year, and having heard that the first Saturday is quiet I headed to Chessington today. Had a great day and it was indeed very quiet! Longest we queued was 35 minutes for Vampire with most other rides being 10-20 minutes. Operations also seemed slightly better on some rides (still generally shocking compared to other parks but an improvement none the less). Didn't venture over to the Hotel side of the zoo so I have no idea how well that development is coming along. The only ride I witnessed break down was Rattlesnake, twice. Once when I was about to board everything just stopped, and second time when I was on the ride break run before the station so I sat there for 5 minutes. Other than that a great day and some photos taken:


The sky was very fitting for a Halloween event!

Sir Arthur's Kobra

Rattlesnake working...

Rattlesnake not working.




It was going so fast it's blurred.

In we go

We made it!

These poor people didn't. R.I.P



The count wishes you all a happy Halloween!

Sorry about being so lazy not to finish this and this won't I guess be the best installment ever but bear with because this is the last part in my trip report to Europa park!
Because the queue had died down, I decided to go on Euro-Mir again, unsuprisingly by myself as none of my family liked it apart from me

Such a good ride tbh!!! Like I said before it is very intense for what it is and by this point only had a 5min queue!

Shiny!

We were almost about to go straight to Silver Star when I had not ridden Atlantica Supersplash. These intrigued me as this seems to be quite a marmite ride, some love it, some find it utterly boring, So with only a 15 minute queue, me and my dad decided to adventure on to this very well themed ride!

Look at those shaky camera skills go!

Splashy!
I have to say I was in the first category, I actually really liked the ride sure it was never going to set my pants on fire like Wodan or Blue fire but it was a heck of a lot of fun! I like the backwards bit and my favourite part was the nice little bunny hop before the splash and it is extremely well themed, it would out quite alot of Thorpe park to shame with that theming This might surprise you but I give this an EC! RATING:8/10 I just totally prefer it to Poseidon which is rough as hell, plus it got me more wet and reminded me of a quirky version of Hydro/Drenched.

Que dodgy selfie to show how Atlantica left my one side completely dry and the other completely soaked:P


I really wanted to take a video (which I forgot to do at Silver Star ) So this was like last minute, sorry it is abit crap but it proves I was there

More pics of the Awesome Fjord Rafting!

If anybody goes to Europa this year or in 2014, I highly recommend this little counter next to Euro-Mir/Food Loop , the pasta is absolutely sublime and the sauce the best I have ever tasted from a counter like that. Its really worth your while checking it out! my only little niggle was that the bowl was abit small but it was gorgeous none the less.
EC! FOOD RATING: 9.5/10

Walking back to the entrance of the Park we see THE GLOBE THEATRE!!

Matterhorn: another incredibly well themed ride!

We were going to do this but then we realised it some how had a bigger queue then Silver Star so we went to that instead

Best queue for a big ride we have had all day!

Getting quite excited now!

Inside Queueline/Exhibition!

I wont say anymore then its a Merc F1 car otherwise I will turn into a complete nerd!

We are getting there!

My sis looks so amused

EEK! almost time!

Well this ride was just awesome! Funny little story for you, you know the Specsavers ad with the old people at backpool Pleasure beach who accidently get on Infusion to the fright of their life?...... Well this happened to my gramps. He thought he was going on Euro-sat, even though the Silver Star signs were BLATANTLY obvious, he was completely oblivious to this until we got on the train and left the train..... his first words were "SH*T I'm ON THE WRONG RIDE!!" at this point me, dad and my sister just burst out laughing! the worst thing was he was on the out side seat so he could see straight down which made him scream a few words that shouldn't be said around the dining table after that point all we could hear after that point was a very high pitch scream come from him for the rest of this ride OMG I was weak after that, this ride was so good but I was totally distracted by my gramps shear terror look on his face. This ride was awesome made better by our little debarcle, it was a shame it finished so quick, because the airtime was out of this world! Such a good ride EC! RATING:9.5/10



B&M GOODNESS!!

At this point I had to say a sad good bye to Europa It certainly is the best theme park I have been to Since Disney Florida, I loved it, and I am SO going again soon!

Bye Blue Fire!

Bye WODAN!!

Bye Europa! See you again soon!

10 years ago, Thorpe Park were graced with the introduction of Nemesis Inferno. It was B&M's 22nd Inverted coaster, a type of roller coaster which had proven most popular over the previous ten years. Billed as 'the world's greatest roller coaster experience' and having a name that obviously was leading itself to be a successor to the extremely popular Nemesis, the ride had a lot to live up to.
Unfortunately, Inferno didn't live up to hype. From what I can gather, it's not a particularly highly rated B&M Invert (it's hard for me to judge of course, having only been on two B&M Inverts, but this is based on what I've heard across various forums, and based on the, Mitch Hawker Poll, where it ranked 123rd, if you feel that has some validity) and is seen as a 'good, but not great' ride. It could also suffer from the criticism of it being a 'cookie cutter' B&M, to a degree. So, instead of being a successor to Nemesis, it ended up more being the runt of the two - not that that's a surprise to anyone really.
However, when you wash away the hype, the expectation and the comparisons, Nemesis Inferno is, simply put, a solid, well-rounded ride. It's nothing special, but not everything has to be, and sometimes I think people expect everything to 'be special'. Inferno is easily the park's least-gimmicky major coaster (something which I think is indirectly highlighting on the park's website as well), which, in a way, makes it more appealing to the general public, especially as a 'starter big coaster'.
My first ride came a year after it opened, and in honesty, I don't remember being particularly impressed. Okay, maybe impressed is the wrong word - I did enjoy it and that, but it felt somewhat lacking to me. For various reasons, I rated coasters such as Colossus, Dragon's Fury and Vampire as 'better'. However, as time has gone on, it has improved in leaps and bounds. I think it's safe to say that the ride has aged incredibly well. Like modern B&Ms, it is quite smooth, yet it has aged in such a way that there are a couple of intense moments; specifically the vertical loop. From about 2006 to 2011, it was my favourite coaster at Thorpe, and second favourite I'd been on, which I think does speak for itself. Last year, for some reason, it didn't rank as well with me; I can't quite explain why though. It just 'felt' as if it wasn't as good as I thought it was. It's tenth year, though, it has come into its own. Fast and intense, with the audio and effects really showing that it is a good ride.
As said earlier, some could criticise the ride for being a bit of a 'cookie cutter' B&M, just sticking together some tried and tested elements and creating a decent ride without really doing anything innovative. The pre-lift section is fun, but feels wasted. Unfortunately, the tunnel which it goes through requires the effects (mist and lovely red lights) to be bursting onto you; this is very hit-and-miss. After the near-100ft climb follows the 'standard' drop to the left followed by a forceful vertical loop. A zero-g roll follows; these inversions are quite possibly my favourite inversion, and this one is quick, relentless and unforgiving.
We get a surprisingly low, ground-hugging turn, which takes us into the first of two 'interlocking corkscrews'. Personally, I don't rate the corkscrews; I don't particular feel like they are a worthwhile part to the ride. They feel very bog-standard, and just thrown in because they work on other Inverts. Thing is, the whole 'interlocking corkscrew' thing doesn't exactly shout out to anyone 'Look at me, I'm an exciting ride', yet I almost feel it was designed to have it in mind, and took away from a potentially more interesting element.
Anyway, enough of the negatives. Following the interlocking corkscrews, the ride meanders a little bit into the finale; a figure of eight helix. Whilst the meandering feels a bit unnatural and against the rhythm of the ride, the finale is fun. The best elements of the ride do come in the first half, which makes the second half feel somewhat lacking; a shame really, but I guess that happens in a lot of coasters to be fair.
Theming-wise, the centre-piece volcano is visually striking and impressive. Okay, so what if the other side of it is just a tin-shed; it doesn't actually take away from the appearance, and it just generally is a pointless thing to worry about. There's so many ways money invested in finishing it off could be spent, most of which would be a much better idea. Other than a few bits of rockwork, and long-gone crocodiles hiding in the pools, there's not really any other bits of theming, which is a shame. However, I can't see how much else could effectively have been added to the ride / ride area. Along with the tunnel effects, there are the geysers which sometimes works; always good to watch them when off-ride. What really sells Inferno, though, is the scenery - all of the trees, foliage and so forth makes you feel like you're in some tropical area, and you actually are nearby a real volcano. It just works - perfectly.
So, that's about it really. Inferno is probably Thorpe's most consistently rated coaster; very few people I know of 'dislike' or 'hate' the ride, and the general opinion of it seems quite positive. In a way, that's what's made this blog entry very difficult to write (4 months in the making, on and off), because it's hard to describe the quality of a coaster like Inferno when everyone more or less accepts that quality. However, being 10 years since it opened, I felt like I needed to do it, and had promised to do one following my Saw, well over a year ago...
And I leave you with this:

Feel the heat SNOW. (Taken on 4th April 2013; Inferno's 10th birthday!)