Martin Doyle

*inserts the obligatory “it’s better than nothing!!” comment

Having finally ridden Wildfire, I think there’s a few things that should be pointed out with it. It is a truely brilliant coaster and in my opinion the best coaster in Europe. HOWEVER, this ride does have two MAJOR flaws. 1, if you ride it early in the day it is very sluggish and slow compared to what it is in the afternoon once it “warms up”. This is quite a flaw given the other RMC I have done (Steel Vengeance) is consistent no matter what time of day you ride it. Flaw number 2 does not apply to me specifically but more to “larger riders” and that is the restraints. Wildfire’s (and Steel Vengeance) leg bracket may not affect me necessarily as I leave that much of a gap between my legs and the bracket BUT if you are somebody with larger legs, these restraints WILL cause you some major discomfort. This coupled with the lap bar itself crushing down on your lap will absolutely nullify most of if not all of the airtime that RMC coasters are famous for. Those flaws aside, Wildfire is a brilliant coaster with one of the greatest first drops in the business (I maintain it has a better drop than Steel Vengeance) and in general a good fun layout. May not be as airtime heavy as I expected but it still had enough decent pops of airtime in its layout and also features some good hangtime. It is simply a stunning coaster to look at with its layout interacting with the rock work and the views from the ride of the surrounding area with the lake and surrounding woodlands and because of the fact it NEVER has any sort of queue, marathoning it over and over is dead easy. Certainly worth a trip to Sweden to ride!!

Thorpe Farm returning for 2020 confirmed!!

In all fairness, I myself am also highly fed up with M£rlin right now to the point where I’ve decided to vote with my feet when my annual pass expires this December. I simply do not want to be one of these people that constantly make out that M£rlin are the second coming of Satan but then continuously pump more money into their pockets and visit their attractions pretty much multiple times a month. There are plenty of great parks to visit across Europe and indeed America where you will see parks operated to their full potential with some real top quality attractions,great operations,great opening hours and in general just blow our parks clean out the water. Failing that then parks like Pleasure Beach and Paultons Park could also be worth a visit as an alternative

And that is precisely why I did not even bother to think about this abomination “funding future projects” I think it’s safe to say Alton Towers make enough money with 1. Food 2. Merchandise 3. Ticket sales 4. Fastrack 5. On ride photos 6. Parking 7. Hotel prices and much more for them to NOT have to start opening damned upcharge attractions... especially upcharged attractions where you can get longer and better versions of them for free!! Assuming M£rlin decide to actually give the money raised by those actually to Alton Towers and not towards building another 1 million Legolands!!

Perhaps you missed the part where I said I’m “actually a big fan of the dungeons” (matter of fact, Edinburgh and Amsterdam are my two favourite M£rlin attractions) so yeah I think it’s safe to say I gave this every chance possible and wanted it to succeed. For the record, I DID focus on what the show lights wanted me to see... however when the lack of theming in the walls and roofs stick out like a sore thumb (you don’t really have to be Sherlock Holmes to spot them!!) it is quite difficult to turn a blind eye to it ESPECIALLY for somebody who as he has just said, has done every other UK dungeon plus Amsterdam so I would like to think I have a rough idea of what the dungeons are capable of as thematic experiences. I went into this with an open mind hoping for it to be good however I’m sorry but on this visit, it fell flat. I don’t care if “other opinions are positive”, this is MY opinion which I feel I’m entitled to regardless if it differs from the majority or not

Having now done all the UK dungeon attractions aswell as Amsterdam and being somebody who is actually quite a big fan of the dungeons, I can quite categorically say that this is easily the worst of the dungeons by a mile. First off I will start with the positives and say the acting quality was strong as was the final scene with the haunting. HOWEVER and without given much away,I find the amount of black walls and blank corridors between the scenes to be absolutely horrendous. Half the joy of the other dungeons in the UK (which gentle reminder, premium pass holders get FOR FREE!!) is the level of detail and immersion that guests get. This dungeon however I can honestly say that when it comes to detail, it makes Charlie and the chocolate factory look like Pirates of the carribean and I am not even close to joking. In terms of the whole “it’s not finished” malarkey I have heard, well if it’s not finished then don’t have the cheek to open it unfinished and then have the nerve to charge extra for what frankly is a very half heartedly executed experience. Again I reiterate that there ARE positives with the acting ability on display as well as the finale. However that does not save an otherwise lacklustre and needless addition to Alton Towers. Honestly I know I could say “it’s better than nothing”, but in this instance I genuinely think I would prefer literally nothing.

Good riddance to bad rubbish. Now if Thorpe Park can do away with their VR disaster that would be great. All the VR did to galactica in my opinion was turn it into a glorified motion simulator and slowed operations right down!! No major loss at all!!

Bigger scale Dungeons that premium passholders get FOR FREE I might add!!

To be fair, when I was at Universal in 2017 the first thing that popped into my mind was “wow I like Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey and Amazing Adventures of Spiderman but I really am missing DBGT and I’m a Celeb right now!!”

Good to see it was that overwhelmed with Likes and positive comments that they disabled the like bar and comments section. So proud they are doing well in the eyes of the consumer

New for 2020 The Thorpe Park Dungeon!! - “A Dungeon like no other!” a 20 minute journey through 500 years of Surrey’s dark history!! * a separate £10 ticket is required for this attraction

Well it’s better than nothing I guess!!

Nothing screams “best themed accommodation” more than the gorgeous Thorpe Shark Hotel. Love me some shipping containers!!

Your favourite park opening it’s very own version of your all time favourite dark ride!!?? Christmas really has came early for you hey!!?? Liseberg really deserve all the credit in the world for their investments over the last few years!! Nearly all have been money well spent which is more than I can say for a certain abomination in a warehouse that relies on VR....