Your Sexuality

[Benin]

They actually have a gay club?!How weird!!!Is it just me or does anyone else think that is a bit special?

Bloody homophobes...

[JamesB]

They actually have a gay club?!How weird!!!Is it just me or does anyone else think that is a bit special?(And before anyone says I am being homophobic - then you clearly haven't met me! )

Its called the Gay-Straight Alliance, so yeah... lots of college have them now apparently. Its about diversity and acceptance, its not special at all. Remember Keith I'm not in Brighton where EVERYONE is gay

[JoshC.]

What annoys me is how there's a rise in all these gay groups and societies and stuff. People are gay. It doesn't change who people are. Why's there a need for all these 'Gay and Proud' groups; it is a part of every day life. Yes, people don't like it still, but that doesn't matter! The fact that there's a rise in such groups just makes me think people are making it seem a bigger issue than it is. I'm straight. I don't go joining or setting up straight societies, so what's the need for gay ones?

[Benin]

What annoys me is how there's a rise in all these gay groups and societies and stuff. People are gay. It doesn't change who people are. Why's there a need for all these 'Gay and Proud' groups; it is a part of every day life. Yes, people don't like it still, but that doesn't matter! The fact that there's a rise in such groups just makes me think people are making it seem a bigger issue than it is.

Maybe, and just maybe as I'm going out on a limb here there's so many groups because there's still a hell load of prejudice against gays even in our modern world?

[JoshC.]

Maybe, and just maybe as I'm going out on a limb here there's so many groups because there's still a hell load of prejudice against gays even in our modern world?

Yeah, there is. And, in my view, some are entitled to be against homosexuality. People have firm religious beliefs, and if that means they're against homosexuals, so be it. They have the same right to be against gays that gays have to be, well, gay. And there are still many people in the world who are against it for no reason other than it being 'wrong' - which is, of course, not the case. But why have such a high influx in gay societies, clubs and so forth? It is just as easy to be gay, ignore others' views and carry on living the way you want.(EDIT: Also, don't anyone think I'm being rude or anything or attacking anyone specifically for being part of these groups, just one of the things that grates me a little. )

[JamesB]

Maybe, and just maybe as I'm going out on a limb here there's so many groups because there's still a hell load of prejudice against gays even in our modern world?

Hit the nail on the head there! My teacher said in the group today, in a better world he hoped there wouldn't be a need for such a group and thats his hope for the future that over time people will become more accepting and there will be no need for such a group.I'm not subject to homophobic abuse myself but my friends regularly refer to things as gay... etc...

[Will]

Maybe its because there are not as many gay / bisexual / lesbians compared to straight people and the fact that gay's get spat at when they are in themepark queues, which is blatant acts of homophobic hatred and the fact, that there is gay bashing and bullying and like a billion other things. There are gays / bi's who don't get served in pubs because of their sexuality. It was on the news online some weeks back.The gay / lesbian club was probably set up in the college to show young students and young adults that, in a college where the majority of people are straight (UNLESS YOU LIVE IN BRIGHTON), that there are some people who are gay / bisexual / lesbian and here's a club to show you, that you are not alone. JoshC can you imagine how terrifying it would be, to feel like your the only open gay / bisexual / lesbian student in your school / college / university??Just because the teacher running / managing the gay / lesbian club is really nice and kind, it doesn't mean he's a paedophile @ (Seb).

[JoshC.]

The thing is Will, there are so many 'minority' categories in this country right now, not just the homosexual and bi one. SO should societies be set up for everyone single one of them, so people don't feel scared and frightened? As for the whole attacking against people because of their sexuality, yes it does happen and I don't deny that. But it's only the minority of people who do that. As for being the only gay at college or uni; it is - in my eyes - doubtful that is ever the case. And, speaking from personal experience and hearing from others, most people are very accepting of people who are gay. In the end, I just don't see the need for so many gay societies and such; it more seems to make the 'issue' worse, rather than better when I think about it.

[themeparkmad]

The gay / lesbian club was probably set up in the college to show young students and young adults that, in a college where the majority of people are straight (UNLESS YOU LIVE IN BRIGHTON), that there are some

You know not everyone in Brighton is Gay yeah?We have (I think) like places you can go for info outside of college if you really wanted to...Some people are going to be big C's... Cause people are so nice...

[Mark9]

The thing is Will, there are so many 'minority' categories in this country right now, not just the homosexual and bi one. SO should societies be set up for everyone single one of them, so people don't feel scared and frightened?

Yes. If you have any idea what it is like to be a minority, then a group where you can meet up with like minded people and talk about experiences, can only help people. Being of a certain ethnicity is not the same as sexuality. You don't have to come out if you are from a certain religion or race but gays do. There is a difference.

As for the whole attacking against people because of their sexuality, yes it does happen and I don't deny that. But it's only the minority of people who do that.

The minority only do it you are absolutely right. But a lot of people are not accepting, even people who say they love gay people still come out with "I don't mind gay people, as long as they don't show it in front of me." So that means holding hands or a simple kiss on the cheek/lips then.

In the end, I just don't see the need for so many gay societies and such; it more seems to make the 'issue' worse, rather than better when I think about it.

I'm afraid I disagree again. It's very easy to stand from a distance and say that the world doesn't need gay socieites and it's a non issue but it is. People are bullied for it, even murdered for it. Gays are called a virus, un-natural by religious groups. Homosexuality is illegal in countires, even parts of the civilised world have it banned in certain states. We live in one of the leading cities in the world and yet people are killed or seriously injured in our very capital. It's about acceptance and the first step towards that is to be understanding of ourselves. You, as a straight person don't have to go to your mum and dad, your family, your friends and say to them "I'm straight." Every gay man and woman at some point has to come to terms with that and maybe socities like these at colleges can help people who are scared of the future.

[JoshC.]

The minority only do it you are absolutely right. But a lot of people are not accepting' date=' even people who say they love gay people still come out with "I don't mind gay people, as long as they don't show it in front of me." So that means holding hands or a simple kiss on the cheek/lips then. [/quote']I based that opinion on everyone I know with their views about homosexuality - and most are simply understanding and do not have the 'don't do it in front of me' ideology. I then reflect that on my overall, which maybe unfair, but it's how I'll always view it.

I'm afraid I disagree again. It's very easy to stand from a distance and say that the world doesn't need gay socieites and it's a non issue but it is. People are bullied for it' date=' even murdered for it. Gays are called a virus, un-natural by religious groups. Homosexuality is illegal in countires, even parts of the civilised world have it banned in certain states. We live in one of the leading cities in the world and yet people are killed or seriously injured in our very capital. It's about acceptance and the first step towards that is to be understanding of ourselves. [/quote']I think I may have said what I was meaning in the wrong context. I dislike the amount of small scale gay societies and clubs - I'm not in any way referring to larger ones. Yes, whilst small scale is fine, I feel it is too much to have every over school college uni etc etc have a gay society. In my eyes, that just seems to be making a bigger issue out of it than it really is. Whilst homophobia is still around, it appears to be a generalisation that many people are. Much like the generalisation made of how all young people are yobs and chavs. The minority of people are giving the majority a bad perspective. If I did fully get my point across about the small scale, and you just referenced the full scale thing, then fair enough - but, as said, I'm more talking about the 'small' scale side. As for homosexuality being results of murders, discrimination and being illegal, I feel it is just wrong. However, one thing I do feel about is the religious group idea. Would like to point out I have no religious beliefs at all, however, if a religious belief is against homosexuality and those who have that belief believe that, then in all fairness then are entitled to that - just like every gay, bi and lesbian person is entitled to be homosexual. I do think though, the 'virus' and 'un-natural' sides are too far, and do not believe it should be decided to the whole religious wars we see, where we get suicide bombers because of religious conflict. Basically, if people are against it for a religious reason - let it be, but not to the extent where hatred is thrown.

You' date=' as a straight person don't have to go to your mum and dad, your family, your friends and say to them "I'm straight." Every gay man and woman at some point has to come to terms with that and maybe socities like these at colleges can help people who are scared of the future.[/quote'](EDIT: To below, this probably also answers your point too Ellie) As much as I hate to sound like a politician saying this, but it is all about the education at a young age. You're right, I don't have to say I'm straight - it is assumed that. And perhaps that needs to change whereby sexuality is understood at a younger age. But that's another controversial subject for another day... :rolleyes:

[Ellie]

What annoys me is how there's a rise in all these gay groups and societies and stuff. People are gay. It doesn't change who people are. Why's there a need for all these 'Gay and Proud' groups; it is a part of every day life. Yes, people don't like it still, but that doesn't matter! The fact that there's a rise in such groups just makes me think people are making it seem a bigger issue than it is. I'm straight. I don't go joining or setting up straight societies, so what's the need for gay ones?

More than just people not being accepting, gays often feel they have to 'come out' as if confessing some kind of sin. They need support doing this, and just as any other support group out there, these groups help people through and come to terms with different situations. That kind of situation can be stressful and can make people feel like they're on their own but a group with similar ideas and perspectives can help give support.

[Deleted Users]

I think I may have said what I was meaning in the wrong context. I dislike the amount of small scale gay societies and clubs - I'm not in any way referring to larger ones. Yes, whilst small scale is fine, I feel it is too much to have every over school college uni etc etc have a gay society. In my eyes, that just seems to be making a bigger issue out of it than it really is.

I don't understand this in the context of an argument. The reason why such clubs have been set up is because of the abuse homo/bisexual people have experienced; there wouldn't be a need for them if there was no abuse.As for making a bigger issue than needed; one of my friends recently came out before going to Uni and told his parents that he was in a gay relationship. The result? Housebond until he had to leave for Uni and his parents hurling abuse at him.

[StevenVig]

Just like every gay, bi and lesbian person is entitled to be homosexual

If I had a pound for every time I say this,Homosexuality is not a choice. I did not choose to be attracted to the same sex, it's a genetic thing.Did you choose to be straight?

[themeparkmad]

The result? Housebond until he had to leave for Uni and his parents hurling abuse at him.

Most people do think that all parents are fine with it. This is obvs an example of where that isnt the case!I told my mum a few months ago and she was alright but I still get the odd guilts but my dad is slightly homophobic so there is no way I am telling him.Only giving that as an example incase any of you lot think it easy to be able to tell your parents something like that. --- Thats the only time I wish I was straight but other than that - f*ck no would I be! :rolleyes:And for once - I agree with Steve. *shivers*

[StevenVig]

And for once - I agree with Steve.

Now that, is a breakthrough.

[JoshC.]

I don't understand this in the context of an argument. The reason why such clubs have been set up is because of the abuse homo/bisexual people have experienced; there wouldn't be a need for them if there was no abuse.As for making a bigger issue than needed; one of my friends recently came out before going to Uni and told his parents that he was in a gay relationship. The result? Housebond until he had to leave for Uni and his parents hurling abuse at him.

The context it was made in was that Mark seemed to make more of a reference to large scale issues and societies: whereas I was referring to the small scale. We all know homophobia is an international issue, but in my experience, only the minority dislike it when someone comes out. When my uncle came out in the 90's,he was treated little differently. When friends have come out, they've been fine. So I use those 'results' if you will as a representation. And with that in mind, I see little need for such societies as it seems to mix the small scale and large scale problems up.

If I had a pound for every time I say this,Homosexuality is not a choice. I did not choose to be attracted to the same sex, it's a genetic thing.Did you choose to be straight?

Yeah, what I said was an adage. But, it was used when comparing to another one.And am I questioning whether it's by choice or not?

[Benin]

Homosexuality is not a choice. I did not choose to be attracted to the same sex, it's a genetic thing.

This. Is an interesting point to make considering a few posts before Holly has chosen to become a lesbian because of men.Therefore, it's not one or the other. It's probably a mixture of both, there's too many variables within the human body to really 100% confirm what makes anyone how they are.And Josh, where DO you actually live? Because you obviously live in a rather accepting area and hence maybe don't have a wider view of other places. I can only imagine what would happen to openly gay people in the middle of Croydon and indeed in my old college there where people got stabbed and raped anyway.Saying that friends are accepting is completely different to EVERYONE accepting. Maybe the friends are in the minority in your area rather than the majority?I highly doubt that the societies are doing anything bar allowing people who aren't confident about it (for whatever reason) to mix about with others and discuss it at a rather difficult time of life (important exams, off to uni, etc), and this is a good thing about giving confidence to people who may get abuse throughout the world as then they can just turn around and walk it off... It will be several years until people are accepting about the gay community because of the views that will be passed down the generations of homophobia and racism and whatever else, it's not something that can be solved overnight and pride (as annoying that it closes down half of London for) and small societies are certainly a start.

[JoshC.]

I live in Chertsey. And the college I go to, in Egham, has people from around parts like Windsor, Sunbury, Staines etc. I've very rarely seen people get attacked for being gay - only once, when a yr8 boy was teased for it.

[Benin]

Isn't Windsor posh?But you've cemented my point, as most people from Staines wouldn't last long in Croydon... Thanks for that...

[StevenVig]

And am I questioning whether it's by choice or not?

Well, yes, how else is one meant to interpret the word "entitled" in the context you've used it in.

This... Is an interesting point to make considering a few posts before Holly has chosen to become a lesbian because of men...

Well, that's just incorrect. You cant just wake up one morning and decide your going to be a Lesbian. It's physically impossible.The fact that Holly has thought like this, is actually an insult to me, someone who was born this way and went through the real process of finding out my sexuality.

[Ricky]

Josh your comments are offensive. It's people like YOU who need to go back to school and learn that its a gynetic reason I prefere same sex relations. Jesus. You don't just wake up one morning and say right I want cock or I want vagina. It's absolutley revolting some peoples views.

[Mark9]

When friends have come out, they've been fine. So I use those 'results' if you will as a representation. And with that in mind, I see little need for such societies as it seems to mix the small scale and large scale problems up.

Some people are very lucky. I have never had this big coming out thing, I'd rather just be myself and if people ask I just answer truthfully. With that though, it's only if I absolutely trust them and know that it won't effect our friendship. For instance, it happened with work colleagues a few weeks back and one of the comments that meant the most was "I saw you were in a relationship on facebook but that doesn't change how I see you." So I've certainly been very lucky in life not to have to need a group or other gays support.But I am a minority. My ex boyfriend still goes through very deep depression over his sexuality and if you're questioning your sexuality in school you do need all the help you can get. Small groups in a college or university will far more personal and may let someone open up more.About the religion thing, you see, things do need to change when it comes to how religions view homosexuality, why shouldn't they? Society has majorly changed. I say that with a slight wareyness though as to be honest many religious people aren't actually that biggoted and don't see homosexuality as an issue.*Mark listens to 'Any Which way'

[Will]

With me, I want to get married and have 6 kids (3 boys, 3 girls) but a part of me finds guys attractive. I don't want a boyfriend because I haven't even a proper girlfriend (Yay for Aspergers and socialising) and I won't have a boyfriend or have sex with one, until I experiment more or have a couple of good boy-friends. I can't stand most straight guys because the majority are cocky / arrogant / immature *****s and getting bullied by a bunch and seeing the darker side of the male sex, has put me off.Don't get me wrong, I still fantasise about having a three-way with Edward (Vampire) and Jacob (Werewolf) but the reality, if that ever came up for real with a boy; I'd probably feel uncomfortable and very reluctant. Homosexuality / bisexuality is forbidden in the UAE / Muslin world. If a man is caught with a woman and that woman is not his wife, they could get into serious trouble. Muslims are very strict about this. You can't have sex on a beach and you can't allow Muslin children to name a teddy bear Mohammed, even if the bear is a prophet =D. It goes to show how behind some people are and how severely these things are treated.JoshC: There should be a club for people with dyslexia, autism, tourettes. etc because you have no idea of how hard it is, to live with Autism / ADHD. 1 in 5 people have IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) and it's more common that the so-called virus that is called homosexuality / bisexuality but there is no club for that. So it goes to show how huge it is being what is described as a different sexuality and literally having the world and certain types of scumbags hate on you. There should be gay clubs because it's hard enough being a teen / young adult and its even harder being gay / bi / lesbian / transsexual

[JoshC.]

Well, yes, how else is one meant to interpret the word "entitled" in the context you've used it in.

I define entitled to be able to have the right to do something. Therefore, people have the right to be gay - be it genetic or by choice.

Josh your comments are offensive. It's people like YOU who need to go back to school and learn that its a gynetic reason I prefere same sex relations. Jesus. You don't just wake up one morning and say right I want cock or I want vagina. It's absolutley revolting some peoples views.

Offensive? I'm sorry, but what have I said that is offensive? Have I said being gay is wrong? No. Have I said that supporting being gay is wrong? No. Please state where I've been in any way offensive, thanks.And I need to learn that it's a genetic reason? To be honest, I think the whole what 'causes' homosexuality is irrelevant. All I ever said was that I dislike the amount of small scale homosexuality groups. What has genetics got to do with that? And, in all fairness, I don't believe genes cause homosexuality. Just like I don't believe nothing can travel faster than the speed of light. Just like I don't believe the world is spherical. Science is just the best theory at the time. I'm sure that in hundreds of years time, the common thoughts to now will be very different - just like the common thoughts now are very different to that of hundreds of years ago. But that's, again, a whole different discussion.

JoshC: There should be a club for people with dyslexia, autism, tourettes. etc because you have no idea of how hard it is, to live with Autism / ADHD. 1 in 5 people have IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) and it's more common that the so-called virus that is called homosexuality / bisexuality but there is no club for that. So it goes to show how huge it is being what is described as a different sexuality and literally having the world and certain types of scumbags hate on you. There should be gay clubs because it's hard enough being a teen / young adult and its even harder being gay / bi / lesbian / transsexual

That's where I'm afraid we disagree. If there was a small scale support club for every darn thing, then that would just be political correctness gone mad. And you point out how homosexuality is less common than IBS, yet homosexuality is more widely brought up. That exactly proves the point that homosexuality is being made a way bigger issue than it actually is, a point I've been trying to get at!