Matt 236

It has been five years since I last visited this quirky little place and quite a lot has changed for better and worse. With a horrible virus still at large and more countries on the quarantine list, I probably won’t be going abroad for a while so staycation it is. But is it all worth it?
New for 2019 the park added Axis, a flat ride which is like an afterburner but goes over the top (360) giving an intense but unique experience. It’s easily the best flat ride and probably one of the best in the park. And for those wondering, yes they did move Dragons Claw into a new location (R.I.P Scorpion). Adventure Ville is one of two dark rides at the park which opened in 2016 on the former Goldmine site (R.I.P).   It’s quite a fun yet charming and slightly cheesy attraction as you essentially get two laps around numerous settings , once in day time and once at night. The light settings change to reflect this. A catchy upbeat soundtrack accompanies the attraction. Areas remind me of the Bubbleworks a little but that’s probably just me. The other dark ride is Over The Hill 2: Spooksville (they like the word ville), the poor sequel to the ride’s Predecessors having opened in 2017.   I managed to do the original Over Hill and thought It was generally great. Unfortunately I can’t quite say the same right now. Don’t get me wrong there are greater ride travesties out there, but honestly what were management thinking? Gone are the mysterious vibes and effects, including the nifty “fake station” effect towards the end of the ride. All of this replaced replaced with cheaper effects and “cardboard cutout” characters and a non existent story.   Not the worst dark ride but still quite the downgrade from the original. Least the music was good and they’ve reused some of the original props too. Still a better ride than DBGT!   Adventure Inside does what it says on the tin and is an indoor area featuring a few rides, play areas and other amenities. It may not be original but least it gives them a place to keep open all year round (non-covid).  They also updated the Crooked House at somepoint wity new figures and effects. It’s ok I guess but least it ain’t Spooksville bad. Bar a few removals/replacements, most other rides remain very much as before. Rage looks great and still rides relatively well too, unlike it’s torturous   cousin on the M25. Shame it went to one train at the end. Green-scream is still remarkably enjoyable  So is Barnstorm (that last helix goes a little crazy) Kiddie Kosta is meh though and I don’t like the name!   Mini Mighty Mega on the other hand is something. It’s got its moments but is generally bumpy, rattly and feels like it might fall apart at any given moment. A one lapper unlike its amigos.   The other rides are ok too. A decently themed chair swing, some fun (yet wet) watersides and a classic whip are just some of them. Time Machine however is just absolutely crazy and abit like a cross between a NASA training machine and a washing cycle. Was unique though given it was made in house.     And I felt like I’d time travelled given the way the park was generally operated and managed.   Adventure Island is a decent enough park for the space and ride selection, however theres one complaint I must make and for once it’s not about the over hyperactive staff they usually have.   The park’s covid measures (or therefore lack of). Whilst they had markers, sanitizer stations and (some) cleaning, more could be done. A lot more! No one at all followed social distancing and few (if any) wore masks in fully loaded vehicles. No temperature checks or entry enforcement either. You wouldn’t think there was a massive pandemic whilst visiting!   Come here if you dare! But maybe wait until the pandemic is over!

So I was recently lucky enough to head across to Poland to visit Energylandia In Zator. The main reason to visit the park ofcourse was the hotly anticipated new for 2019 RMC Hybrid Zadra. So for this write up, I will be sharing my full thoughts on this well received in the coaster community coaster and where it matches up to my top coasters.
 
A brief history and background!!
 
Zadra is Rocky Mountain Constructions second “hyper hybrid" ibox track coaster with the first being my personal number one coaster Steel Vengeance. It is also the third RMC installation on the continent behind Wildfire at Kolmarden and Untamed at Walibi Holland. Zadra is also the very first RMC Ibox track coaster to be a ground up installation. Previously, RMC would use the “topper track” design that features on rides like Lightning Rod and Wildfire for their ground up designs whereas the “Ibox" track design would be used on conversions of pre-existing wooden coasters. So this was the first use of Ibox track for a ground up model. At opening, Zadra would break the records set by Steel Vengeance for the tallest and fastest Hybrid coaster by a whopping 1 FOOT and 1MPH. Zadra will lose the record for fastest when Iron Gwazi at Busch Gardens Tampa opens (also by 1mph!!) and will see its height record matched by the new Florida hyper hybrid. It will also lose the record it shares with Steel Vengeance for steepest drop (90 degree) on a hybrid when Iron Gwazi opens by 1 degree!! Zadra initially was going to open at the park in 2020. However, as a result of it being completed ahead of schedule, the park was able to open it at the end of August 2019. This is even more impressive given a portion of the structure was blown over in a storm during its construction!!
 
Heading to Zadra/ Dragon Zone

Zadra is located at the very back of the park in the new expanded area the park has built into. So on entering Energylandia and walking through what could best be described as a glorified fun fair, you will find an underpass to take you to the other side of the road and into “Dragon zone" (or Dragon Castle) and you will find a new Medieval themed village with a few stores and eateries with Zadra towering above the lot of it on the right hand side. This area is charming enough with its audio (featuring an appearance from Hall Of The Mountain King!!) and the odd show going on. This area also features two family coasters and a kiddy flat ride. To get to the star attraction, you will walk through the entirety of this themed area where you will then find the entrance to Zadra on the right.
 
The queue!!
 
There has been a lot of enthusiasts who have visited the park and cried blue murder over the sheer length of Zadras physical queue line and I can now safely say, they are not unjustified in their comments!!. I have ridden many coasters in my time and not once have I found a coaster that has a queue of such a ridiculous length to walk through than what Zadra takes to navigate. Coupled with the fact there are NO short cuts whatsoever to cut off some of the queue, you WILL have to deal with this walk every single time you ride Zadra. This massively hurts the rides reliability unless you are as fit as a fiddle and just enjoy walking for a ridiculous amount of time. The queue takes 5-7 minutes to navigate and I kid you not, equates to half a mile worth of walking when you convert steps into mile. If you are familiar with the FLY queue and the length of that queue than that may give you a slight idea what to expect with Zadra. It also does not help when theres a fair few stairs to climb up and down to get to the ride aswell. So yes. I would advise getting fit before heading out to ride this thing However!! Whilst the queue is insanely long, it is relatively aesthetically pleasing on the eye with the medieval style walls in certain places and also allows for some wonderful views of the coaster. So this is a big positive for those who enjoy video taking and photography.
 
The lockers
 
So after finally reaching the station buidling for Zadra, you will be faced with the locker area. Energylandia offers a fairly decent locker set up in where you pay around the same as £1 and you are given a wristband for all day lockers. You will scan your wristband and then you will be allocated a locker to store bags and loose belongings in. The lockers are double sided so you will collect your belongings from the other side of the wall on exiting the ride. No belongings are allowed to be left in the station.
 
Operations/batching
 
On placing your items in your locker, you will climb the stairs and head to be batched. Zadra (as well as Hyperion) uses a pretty neat loading system where there are four screens which count down the amount of riders who can go through into the station. One screen is for the front row line. Another screen is for single riders and two more screens are for the rest of the train. Once the counter shows theres seats for you, you will go through to board the coaster. A tip if you want the back row. Try to make sure you get yourself in a position where you are in front of the door to the station and as soon as it opens, make a beeline for the back. You can NOT request a row from my experience whilst in the station. Depending on what mood Energylandia are in, they will run it on one or two trains. So if you are wanting the front row, be aware that you will be waiting a long time if they opt to run it on one given the length of the coaster.
 
Operations on Zadra was very bizarre on my visit. They opened on one train and then when the queue got longer it put a second on but then half an hour later, they took the second off when the queue went back down. Then the real “what the hell!!?” moment came later on where one hour before closing, they swapped trains around which wasted well over 15 minutes of my time. Its also worth noting that if the ride is walk on, they will wait until the train is near full until they send it. So abandon any hope of a “zen ride" on it before going to ride!! A part of me feels the train swap I mentioned earlier was a way of building the queue up a little.
 
The trains
 
So after all the effort it took to get to this point, it is now time to head into the nicely styled station of Zadra and board the train. Zadra ofcourse uses the standard RMC trains so you will be greeted with the usual policy of fasten your seatbelt but let the operator put the bar down. Although on my rides, the staff insisted on doing the seatbelt aswell. The trains feature the standard RMC restraints of a lapbar and a pair of shin guards. As I have mentioned previously with my reviews on the other RMC coasters, these restraints cause me personally no bother at all. However, if you are a larger rider or have larger legs then they can cause major discomfort. Its also worth noting that the shinguards on Zadra are slightly thicker than the ones on Untamed and Steel Vengeance. So be aware of this if you found the restraints on those two painful. The operators on my visit also seemed to be hell bent on causing me as much pain as possible. As in, literally slamming the restaint down on me and trying to put it as far down as possible. Compared to how I was treated on Steel Vengeance and Untamed, this left a very sour taste in my mouth. Hopefully in future visits, this wont be the case.
 
The coaster itself

After being given the clearance to dispatch, you are on your way!!. The train glides out of the station and dips down to the right before latching onto the loud (the mark of a Hyper Hybrid lift hill!!) 206 foot lift hill. Ascending this hill, you are greeted with some amazing views of the area around you. With the local countryside to the right and front of you and the new Dragon zone area to the left. You also will get some views of the all new Aqualantis area.
 
The train ascends this lift hill at a quick speed and sooner than you think, you reach the top and hit the 200 plus foot vertical drop!! This drop is a pure and utter stunner!! You are raised out of your seat the whole way down regardless of where you sit and as it drops into the wooden structure, it creates one hell of a head chopper moment. This drop feels exactly the same as that on Steel Vengeance in terms of the physical sensation and you WILL feel the force at the bottom of this drop but given the head chopper at the bottom, this rides drop just about edges that on big Steve!!
 
Speeding through the woodwork, you will turn slightly to the right over a small speed hill where the camera for your onride photo is to the right. This speed hill is then followed by the highlight of the coaster. At a massive 76mph, you will bank upwards aggressively to the left in a massive turn around before levelling up at the top before plummeting back down to ground level. This element is an amazing combo of intensity and airtime. As you bank upwards, you are right on your side feeling grey out level of force and when you hit the top and drop down you get a beautiful sustainted pop of ejector airtime. This is the absolute show stealer on Zadra. On exiting this element, the train will shoot up into the Zero G Stall and boy is this a cracker of an inversion. You enter and exit the element at a great speed and experience some stunning hangtime. The height of this element also adds to that hangtime sensation massively. The best inversion on the coaster.

 
Still travelling at a breakneck pace, the train then sharply turns left into its outwards airtime hill which sharply throws riders from right to left before navigating some turns before hitting the massive airtime hill. This airtime hill is utterly brilliant. Going through it offers a good mix of ejector and floater airtime and is a good solid intense moment.
 
Following this, the train shoots up into its second inversion which is a Zero G Roll in the middle of the wooden structure. It takes this element at a quick pace and coupled with the rider being surrounded with the structure, it is a real disorientating element and offers great headchoppers. Yet another great element.
 
Speeding out the structure, the train shoots through a double down element which offers two pops of solid ejector which feels like shades of the Untamed and Steel Vengeance airtime. The ride will then race through an S turn which throws the rider around even more before it enters a very fastly taken Zero G Roll before turning to the left and into the very aggressive breaks. Brace yourself for these breaks as you will be lunged right forward into your restraint. Let the speed it hits the breaks at tell you how fast this coaster navigates its 1316 metres of track!!. The ride then heads back into the station and you are free to exit and ride again!!....if you really want to make that walk again that is!!
 
Overall thoughts

 
Zadra is incredible. Absolutely incredible. I at the time of updating this have now done three trips to Energylandia and each time it has got better and better.
 
Whilst I do not think Energylandia is a particularly great park (for now!!) Thanks largely to its glorified fun fair feel, they have absolutely struck gold with Zadra. Zadra is a perfect mix of intensity,airtime,hangtime,speed and transitions. Loads of people have been dismissive of the airtime on Zadra by watching POV videos of it but let me tell you that the airtime on this should not be underestimated. It is not all about the airtime like what Untamed is but my lord it still has some strong moments of it.
 
What makes Zadra great to me is its use of speed throughout the whole course. It really does not lose any steam from drop to breaks and of anything, it could have gone on much longer if it wanted to with the speed it hits the breaks at. It really is paced wonderfully and has a flawless layout.
 
Surprisingly, I found the front row of this coaster to be the best row on it by an ever so slight margin. With Untamed and Steel Vengeance, I go for the back but on Zadra, I found the front to be where its at. You still get a good drop there and you feel the speed and airtime very well in the front. The back row however gives one heck of a pull over the drop and over the massive turnaround element. So both rows definitely excel over the other in some regards.
 
The million pound question when Zadra came around was “is this going to be the Steel Vengeance killer?”. In my own personal opinion, the answer to that is no as Steel Vengeance has all of whats great about Zadra AND Untamed in one package. The extra 30 plus seconds on Steel Vengeance is to me is what clinches it. Whilst I prefer Steel Vengeance, it is by an ever so slight margin and if Zadra lasted an additional 15-20 seconds, it may well have been the coaster to displace Steel Vengeance. On my initial rides on Zadra in 2020, I was also convinced I also preferred Untamed over at Walibi but having now done additional trips to both of these hybrids, it really is now a no contest that Zadra is not only the best RMC in Europe but also HANDS DOWN the best coaster overall in Europe. It really does offer such an unrelenting ferocious coaster in what is a relatively short ride time. I personally would rather a 40 second coaster that has no dead spots and ferocious pacing than I would a coaster that is a minute and a half and farts about for most of it. So Zadra to me is just ideal.
 
One negative as I mentioned earlier is that the rerideabillity of Zadra is greatly harmed by the excessive length of the queue. Even if you love riding a coaster over and over, its just so hard to motivate yourself to walk all the way back round Zadra to do so.
 
The other silly negative negative is the fact front row riders are required to wear goggles in the front. This is also present at Hyperion. To the best of my understanding, this was in place BEFORE Covid but was bought back post Covid (it we can call it that) so makes zero sense how we could do without them for two years but magically need them now
 

 
That being said, Zadra is a stunning coaster and takes its place at number 2 on my top coaster list. It really is a great coaster from start to finish and once again showcases that RMC are the top dog in the coaster industry and that other manufacturers need to up their game to keep up with them. Please get yourself out there to ride it whenever you can and you will not be disappointed in this absolute masterpiece.
 
10/10

 

2020, it’s been one crazy roller coaster ride and sadly one that hasn’t been particularly enjoyable. It has been rougher than a ride on Saw or Gouderix.
  With a massive pandemic halting life as we know it, everything has been challenging in general, let alone theme parks. Skip ahead to now and with parks cautiously reopening I would finally get to visit a one again, this time a new one.  Fantasy Island in Ingoldmells near Skegness is an amusement located adjacent to a large open air market. Now in the hands of the Mellor’s group, this would be an ideal opportunity to nail the final key U.K. park on my bucket list. On the surface, it might just look like your typical sea side fun fair or something (which it somewhat is). And you might even mistake it for Winter Wonderland if you look at from certain angles.  But it’s a good one at that featuring a decent selection of attractions. Like this flat ride which was actually a lot of fun. The drop tower is alright except for the silly short seatbelts! They have an alright log flume, which is actually fun. Rhombus Rocket is one of five park coasters. It might look your standard powered coaster off ride, but this thing really packs a punch and gives off airtime that I didn’t think was possible on such a ride. Easily my favourite U.K. ride type, which isn’t actually a Mack but made by WGH transportation. One of the main attractions is the Millenium. At 20 years it’s still silky smooth and looking fresh after a funky paint job a few years ago. Probability my favourite there although the ride station’s placement on the street is both hilarious and unique. Until a few years ago the entrance was too. The other headliner is Odyssey, a large Vekoma SLC, erm. At 167ft it is the tallest SLC ever made and third tallest U.K. coaster.  SLCs have a reputation in the industry of mostly being rough and uncomfortable coasters. This ride is not exception as your head and ears are constantly bashed around as the ride completes it’s circuit. Despite the roughness there was something I liked about this coaster although it may be last of the three ride types I’ve done. If they modified or replaced the train to decrease roughness I think it would be a great attraction. Think I’m dreading Condor if I get to do that.   A pyramid building resides in the park’s centre. This houses several amenities from bars, restaurants, arcades and several attractions. The charming interior design reminds me of Coral island and the ‘original’ Dome albeit on a greater scale. There are two dark rides in here, one of them is the Magical Seaquarium. Opening in 1995,  it’s certainly a charming attraction with an upbeat soundtrack which synchronises better than some. Sadly a number of effects were broken which given current circumstances probably isn’t a high priority for the park. Although rumours suggest a refurbishment is planned. Toucan Tours is the other dark ride, where you enter an enclosed section with numerous scenes after meandering the pyramid area. It’s quite random but enjoyable nonetheless. Some of the pyramid’s other inhabitants include a few kids rides such a tracked pony ride, a water slide (which was sadly closed when visiting and a Jurassic themed mini golf. The second half was themed noticeably better than the first, however space limitations are likely the result of this. It’s still amazing how much has actually been squeezed into the building since the refurbishment 2/3 years ago.  Overall Fantasy Island is a fun and pleasantly enjoyable park, even in the amidst of a pandemic. Usually you’d be free to roam and enter the place from many angles, but for now it is a strict entry system. Operations at the park are alright and everything else including food is to an adequate level too. Although a fight apparently did break out whilst queuing for the Flume. We took a walk down the road where numerous bars, restaurants and amusements were and was pleasantly surprised to see how buzzing and upbeat the place was. Haven’t seen this in years and gave a rich holiday feel. However social distancing was rarely properly seen.   Would recommend, but just be careful.

And Day 5 brings an end to the trip, where we spend a few hours at Dennlys Parc, which is about an hour from Calais...
 


Covid Measures
Face coverings on rides if you're over the age of 11. Some queues had social distancing markers I think, and people kept at a sensible enough distance. The visit was the day after face coverings has become compulsory in shops again across the whole of France, so I expect that the idea of social distancing might have been on people's minds a bit if it was pushed a lot by the media.  

A long meandering drive meant we arrived to the park about quarter past 10, and their first (smaller) car park was approaching full-ness, and a couple of coaches of young school kids were entering the park. A little bit of a worrying start, but it turned out not to matter as the park was pretty quiet all day, with basically no queues.

First stop of the day was Nitro, a Mobius loop coaster where you do both sides in one ride. It's an okay ride, the concept of course being quite novel, especially with a hint of duelling (though I wish it was timed so that cars went over the air time hill at the same time). However, there's a really nasty turn half way through the 'left side' of circuit, which gave a really uncomfortable lateral jerk. Was not a fan. Plus there was little leg room in the front row of the car, making it a bit uncomfortable.

We rode it later in the day too, so it's not horrendous, but that was more out of 'needing to drag a bit more out of the park' than really wanting to reride.  

We did some of their family rides, including their new-for-2020 ride which was a pedal sky car ride called Xotic. It wasn't a very exotic experience tbh. Next stop was a ride on their figure 8 spinner for the +1 (made by a company called Gesotto, who I'd never heard of before - another one for the manufacturer count I guess!). All that led upto a ride on Furio, their Soquet coaster which was by 200th cred. Boom, achievement unlocked right - I'm slightly less basic now...

I remember being a younger, very basic goon sitting on 20 creds thinking how cool it would be one day to have 200 creds; a 'bucket list' sort of thing. So it was nice to hit it, feels a bit more substantial than any other milestone I'll probably hit (unless I magic myself to 1000 one day)..  
I even made a terrible sign and felt like a pillock getting my photo taken. Never again.

Furio itself was a bit meh. Not the good level of wacky that some Soquets are.
 

Looks nice though with the trees

With creds done, it was just a case of ticking off rides. One intriguing ride was Squadron 33, which is a mix of an Enterprise and Gerstlauer Sky Fly..

As I've said, I hate spinning rides, but I'm also a sucker for doing something a little different and unique (most of the time), and I don't usually mind Sky Flys (though I hate Enterprises..), so I gave it a go. But damn did I regret it. I was able to rotate myself at points - I think! - but the double spinning motion really hit me. It was much more difficult to judge when you'd be upside down. However, you can get some really cool 'drops' if you time your rotations right.
Definitely not my cup of tea, but a really solid and different ride in fairness!  
After recovering and doing gentler rides, we'd managed to squeeze to just past midday, so had lunch at the restaurant near the front of the park. They had "tacos" on the menu, with a variety of fillings (Mexican, doner, vegetarian, etc). I ordered a Mexican taco, and was somewhat disappointed to find that their version of a 'taco' is in fact a panini... Still, was alright for price.

It turns out that after lunch I didn't bother taking any more photos, which probably says something about my feelings about the place. The afternoon was spent doing some of their other family rides on the side of the park that doesn't have creds and a couple of rerides. A particular highlight was their water boat ride, where you drive your own dingy around what's effectively a pool, which also has a water gun attached. You get a solid 3 minute cycle to just squirt people, including helpless people in the queue, and bump around. Pure, simple fun - but also very wet! And, in fact their rapids ride was decent as well - also very well, and actually built by, you guessed it, Soquet.. Oh that random French company, you're full of surprises.
 
I lied, I took one photo after lunch...of this pistachio ice cream I had. It was tasty. So enjoy this final photo...

The park also had a 'sitting on a rocking chair with a gun in front of a screen and shoot things' attraction, behind their spinner, but it was closed all day. No sign explaining why and nothing on the website, so not sure if because of Covid or if it's just buggered.

We managed to drag the day out till just after 2pm, before ultimately deciding to move on. With no creds or nothing of particular fun en route between the park and Calais, where out half 7 ferry would eventually await us, we decided to divert to Cité Europe, the large shopping centre by the channel tunnel terminal, to kill a couple of hours before a stress-free journey home.

Final Dennlys thoughts: My trips have a habit of sticking on a smaller park after visiting great parks to end it (my first major European trip saw me end with a visit Bobbejaanland after multiple days after Efteling and Phantasialand, for example). Unsurprisingly, Dennlys felt rather flat after an incredible day at Asterix. The park is nice and has a few cool rides for a family group, but felt a little weak compared to some of the other smaller parks from the trip.

And so that's that - thanks for reading! 

And now the big one, Day 4 - Parc Asterix! And this was, in fact, my first visit to Asterix.

I'll start as ever with the Covid measures
Face coverings were obligatory on all rides and in queue lines. There were hand sanitising points at the end of every queue (just before you board the ride), as well as at ride exits and dotted around the park. There were social distancing markers in queues, but no one really followed them much tbh. However, park security had a major presence in queue lines, regularly walking through queue lines, making sure everyone had coverings on, and were covering their noses. This went to the extreme where I witnessed a security guard watch someone have a drink and not move on until they had finished their drink and put their covering back over their face. A little OTT in my opinion, but equally I can't argue with results: seeing everyone in queues masked up did give a good level of reassurance.

Interestingly as well, the park were very hot on filling up every seat - single rider was still in operation, and they were happy to get smaller groups matched up in queues too. The only exception was on water rides, where they weren't trying to fill boats to the full. There are questions about the point of social distancing on rides in my opinion, especially if everyone is wearing a covering, but it did feel odd sitting next to strangers again.

Anyways, onto the park. First time I've experienced metal detectors at a full on theme park (Ja-Dar isn't necessarily a 'full on park' imo), but it was done smoothly and easily. Anticipating it would get long queues, we headed over towards the back of the park, where the first stop was Tonnerre de Zeus..

We were on in under 15mins which was nice. Zeus is a ride I'd heard a lot about for many years. Whilst I'd seen a lot of people say it's a bit of a love-or-hate ride, most reviews I'd actually read were that it was good, which gave me some quiet optimism. Sadly though, it did nothing for me. It's got a long layout, yet manages to feel like it does nothing with it. It's not rough, but doesn't have enough fun / classic woodie laterals to give it that sort of edge. I don't remember there being any air time either. It just sort of goes around for a while and ends?

Even riding it later in the day, it did very little for me. I remember feeling a bit more positive about it, but not much. I just don't really get it? Why do people like this?
Is it because of Zeus' underpants? I bet it's because of Zeus' underpants.
 

I don't care if you're wearing floral underpants - your ride isn't that good

A quick stop to the neighbouring Goudrix was of course in order. Similarly, this is something I'd heard a bit of a mixed bag of, but mostly negative reviews. In particular, @pluk's review of it from a few years ago stuck in my mind (spoilers for those who don't know: he's not a fan of it..). And, of course, it has regularly been near the bottom of several coaster polls over the years. So I wasn't looking forward to it. However, I was pleasantly surprised! The ride was smooth, the right level of intense and reasonably fun. It's not something I rank highly, as a layout of inversions is ultimately a bit meh, but it was fun enough.

Again, a ride was had later in the day. And frankly, I don't know what happened - was a riding a different ride? It was rough and jerky and I did not enjoy it from the third inversion! Perhaps not as bad as some had described it, but still pretty bad. Really not sure how I could have such different reactions to it.

My first ride was in the front of a car, and the second in the back of a car, so I guess that could have something to do with it. Could also be different trains too I guess. After that second ride though, I didn't want to risk a third to try and figure it out. But it's just crazy how different the ride experiences were.  


A ride on L'Oxygenarium ("the good Storm Surge" I believe us Brits are required to call it by law) followed, en route to the next cred: Trace du Hourra. I've only ever done Intamin Swiss Bobs before, so it was intriguing to see how the Mack equivalent would ride. And it was alright. Layout is solid, theming around is good and the operations were outstanding. It'd be nice if it swayed a bit more, as it did feel very restricted, but I guess many of these rides feel like this.
 

We collected the +1 of the Zierer bum rattler, SOS Numerobis (which has an excellent, almost B&M-like roar might I add), before arriving at the highlight attraction, which is of course Oz'Iris.

Just looking at the area you can tell it's something spectacular. It just looks stunning, from the theming, the dive under the pathway, to even things like the track colour. Everything just blends beautifully. The queue wasn't too long, no more than 30mins, which was long enough to appreciate the stunning indoor queue line too. And once you get into the station, you see they've capped off the atmosphere perfectly. Even the little lighting sequence on dispatch is just great. Everything works. Also, fair play to the staff, who worked their nuts off loading and unloading the ride - jumping inbetween rows to unclip the seat belts whilst the train was still moving(!), and checking bars insanely quickly. Something like that is an art.

As for the ride itself, it was brilliant. A lovely mix of forces, floatly moments, great inversions, decent length and perfectly paced. First drop is fantastic. My highlight has to be when you dive underground past the waterfall, and then come out into the inversion, which is wonderfully profiled. It's just fantastic all round.

My issue with B&M rides, which may be a bit controversial, is that when their rides age, they seem to become more intense and forceful. I've noticed it particularly with Inferno at Thorpe, but even my experiences on the likes of Nemesis, Baron 1898 and even Galactica suggest this 'more intense with age' trend. They're like cheeses: they mature and get stronger flavour. As someone who's not a fan of high-G intense rides usually, it's meant some of those rides have gone down in my rankings as time goes on (particularly true with Nemesis).

Oz'Iris was intense, but it was the right level for me. It'll be interesting to see how it feels in a few years (ie - when I go back for the Intamin), and whether it's experiencing the same 'growing intensity with age' thing! But for now: 4 rides throughout the day, including a wondrous front row ride, puts it as my favourite B&M, and slides into my Top 5..  

I really liked this bit in the station, loosely showing the layout of the ride

The random fountain show was fun too - never saw it in its entirety though!

Another water ride was in order before lunch, and with the log flume closed for technical difficulties, Le Grand Splatch was the port of call. I'm not normally a fan of big boat / big splash rides (too wet too quick), but this was surprisingly decent, since the finale was more for show, and it was water effects which got you wet.
 
In case you haven't been able to tell, I really like water effects

With stomachs grumbling, lunch was needed. I'd heard not-good things about food options at Asterix, but ended up being pleasantly surprised at the quality of the restaurant by the log flume (Le Relais Gaulois). A canteen-style restaurant where all the food options looked really good, and ended up being great too. Reasonably priced too, so would recommend!

Explored some of the kiddie area, including their decent boat ride, before heading to their Vekoma madhouse, Le Defi de Cesar. I'd heard wonderful things about this, including the pre shows, but knew before visiting that because of Covid, they weren't running said preshows. I was intrigued how it would operate, and the short answer is: badly. It didn't help we went on the ride just after a shutdown, but you enter the ride through the exit and just go straight into the ride. Sadly there was no audio and half the screens weren't on either, creating a really awkward experience. From what I've heard, it sounds like the complete experience is a good one, but this was just rubbish. Hopefully the lack of on ride effects was a blip, but I do wonder if they should just keep it shut whilst they're running the pre shows.  
Boat ride in the kids land has loads of nice set pieces
This chap gave me some serious moustache-envy...

Keeping within the Roman area, we cooled off on the rapids, which look stunning but could do with being a bit wetter in my opinion, before braving Pégase Express. Unsurprisingly, this had a long queue pretty much all day, but I guess a 40 minute queue for the park's newest coaster in the middle of July isn't too bad. Again, queue was magnificent, giving great views of the ride and the rapids, and the indoor section was brilliant. The ride itself is solid too. The launch out the station took me by surprise, the section after the lift hill is good fun with some nice twists and turns. The shed is simple but effective, and the backwards section is the perfect length and style. So all in all, a fantastic family coaster.
Also worth saying they weren't using the bag drop; don't know if that's just because of Covid (it seemed in an awkward space) or if they're just not bothering with it (let's face it, if you can keep your bags on Goudrix, you can keep your bags on this easily).

The final cred was ticked off after this. Another +1.


Something I'd been really looking forward to at Asterix was L'Aérolaf, the park's 'rotating bar'. You buy a drink, then take a seat at a table at the bottom of a tower. You then go up 35m and slowly rotate, taking in views of the park and surrounding area, whilst enjoying your drink for about 10mins, before coming back down. Awesome concept for a theme park, and I'd always wanted to do one of those 'have a meal in the sky' experiences - so this was very much a discount version on that. Great views, really nice and open (you just have a seatbelt in your seat of course), and was a great way to break up the day.

It's on the pricier side - my mocktail was 7,90€ - but I'd say it's worth doing. For reference, a bottle of Coke was 6,90€, which I think was about a 3-3,50€ mark up compared to elsewhere at the park. So if you view it in that sense, you're paying about 3,50€ for the experience, which isn't bad. You even get to keep the themed cup your drink is served in!

One weird quirk for this though: You had to wear a covering whilst the table went from the bottom to the top. You were then told you could remove it. When it was ready to go back down, we were told to wear a covering again. Felt very odd and pointless given everyone had their coverings off/down for the past 10 minutes and we were the same distance away as before.


Excuse the feet, but yeah - it's high!
Me trying not to look like I'm bricking myself and desperately afraid of dropping drink

Ahh, the face covering hides that fear...but just makes me look like a confused middle-aged man who has no idea how the selfie mode on his phone works...

Final major ride to do was Menhir Express, their log flume, which was back open and had a reasonable queue. It was a decent log flume, good level of wet and the surprise shed moment took me completely off guard and I loved it!  

This took us to about half 4ish, leaving the final 2 and a bit hours for re-rides and just admiring the park. Things really died down in the last half hour or so; Oz'Iris was basically walk on for example! Really awesome way to end the day.

Final thoughts: Asterix is bloody brilliant. I really enjoyed it and, all in all, it's up there as one of my favourite parks. I may not be a fan of two of their major coasters, but it's clear they serve a purpose and people do enjoy them. Their water ride selection is brilliant. And they have a good selection of other rides which will suit most people's tastes too (I never bothered with their flat rides for example, but they were always busy and look sublime). Their quality of theming is amazing as well, along with all the staff being top notch too! Would love to see the park get another dark ride or two, and can't wait till 2023 for the Intamin (or whenever it gets pushed back too..!)

"Day 3? What happened to Day 2 though Josh? Have I missed a magnificent report of a wonderfully obscure French park that most people don't care about?" I hear no one ask. 
Well, it's been edited into my previous blog entry, to save me hogging all the blog entry space  
 
When this trip was planned, it was prior to the Formule incident at Parc Saint Paul. For those who don't know: a woman fell out of one of their roller coasters (Formule1), dying. The ride has a poor history, also being the reason another person died at the park in 2009. It was later found out the ride should have had a seatbelt restraint as well as a lapbar, but the seatbelt had been removed by the park, by decision of the director. They have said the ride will be removed once all investigations are complete.
 
I didn't know much about the park beyond their reasonably new woodie, but after the accident I'd read more on it. Needless to say the accident was shocking in itself, and the reaction from the park's director was even moreso. There was a point where loads of rides were closed, and even rumours the park may be closed as a result of the incident, so we had looked at alternatives to the day if that was the case. This turned out attention to Jardin d'Acclimatation - a small garden-theme park type area on the outskirts of Paris, somewhere which I had completely discounted / forgotten about.

Ultimately, Parc Saint Paul had all rides bar Formule running, but we realised we wouldn't need a full day, so decided to do both parks. More creds! And "Jar-da" (which was much easier to say) also had 2 Soquets - even better! 

Parc Saint Paul
Covid measures
Like other parks, they had signs saying where masks were obligatory. From memory, I think basically all the rides we did you had to wear one. There were a few hand sanitising points about, and social distancing seemed minimal. It seemed that some rides were having seats sanitised after every 2-3 cycles too.
 

We pretty much arrived as the park opened at 10am, but most rides weren't meant to open till half 10. After some milling around, and a go on their slide, first ride of the day was the log flume. Credit to the staff member here who was brilliant too. Set an expectation that the park would be one of those ones where staff were the right level of friendly, whilst also being efficient. Turned out she was the exception - most staff were more focused on talking among themselves.

Log flume was exceptionally wet though; took a solid couple of hours to get dry.


We moved onto Wood Express, which I later realised was my first Gravity Group woodie. I was both surprised and disappointed by the ride - there's a good few moments of airtime throughout. Nothing major or really powerful, but a few moments which were nice. But the ride was incredibly rattly. For a ride that's barely 2 years old, it was really bad. Vibrating all over the place and really just not that enjoyable to ride. The restraints aren't the greatest either which doesn't help. So yeah, despite some nice moments, it's just not that good.
 



A quick go on the spinning wild mouse (where we sat sensibly this time and had minimal spinning!) and drop tower (which takes WAY too long to reach the top), we moved onto their open Pax - Wild Train. It had the classic Pax uncomfortable-ness from going side-to-side, but the first drop was pretty damn fun at the back.
 

We moved on quickly and collected the final 3 open creds (Wacky Worm - which actually had a queue, disgraceful! - the custom Vekoma Rollerskater which was meh and the Zamperla Mini Mouse). All creds done by 11am! Temperatures were soaring so we cooled down on their dingy slide, which has an impressive entrance feature, before heading to the infamous Telepherique. For those unacquainted, this thing...

I'd heard about this a few times before visiting, and had forgotten on the day it was actually here until I saw it. For those who don't know - you stand on a little podium suspending under the track. You run off the platform and gravity goes the rest; with your platform swinging and spinning frantically throughout. I'm sure there's videos on Youtube showing it off better. Frankly, it's a bloody terrifying experience. I was hanging on for dear life throughout, and I spun an obscene amount through the second half, to the point I had no clue how to stop myself near the end. Took me a few minutes to recover too; bloody spinning rides making me feel old...

To more or less round the day off, we did their indoor walkthroughs. In particular, Le Château Hanté was fantastic! A really well done, scary walkthrough in my eyes - some solid jump scares, really dark and good triggered effects. It does feel like it would be a bit better as a Ghost Train rather than a walkthrough, but I guess that any walkthrough done this well would be the same.

We wandered round the park a bit more, opted to do a second ride on Wood Express, which was a little more uncomfortable at the back, which rounded off our time at the park, a little before midday.
 

Entrance to the dingy slide was cool - love me a good waterfall!

I rarely do Disk'os, and this was no exception - but it looks really cool!

Honestly, I wasn't a big fan of Parc Saint Paul. Rides themselves weren't great anyway, despite some pockets of good theming, but the park just didn't sit right with me. From things like the seemingly circus-like lion show, which feels like an outdated principle, to them parading the fact they have extremely tall and extremely short staff members like they're an attraction in themselves, it just felt off with me. Along of course with the recent incident. With most (perhaps even all?) parks I've visited, I could at least envision myself revisiting them in some circumstances - but Parc Saint Paul, I really don't envision me wanting to return, without some larger changes.

For those wondering what the state of Formule is...
Some fences with fake grass draped over them. The cars are covered in tarp. No signage accompanying it.


Taking to the road, an hour and a bit later we were at the outskirts of Paris, in 30C+ temperatures getting ready to enter Jardin d'Acclimatation...

Entering was a bit of a faff. There was a small queue to buy entry/tickets, and since we were paying by card, we were directed to the automatic machine for buying entry. However, it wasn't till after we got there that we realised we couldn't buy the wristband (which gives entry and unlimited ride access) there, and instead had to queue to get to a booth, which took a long time.

We were eventually in, and food was the first sensible stop. The first food place we went to was out of all lunch options, except for a few kids sandwiches. We eventually found somewhere that was open, albeit with a long queue and food options weren't the greatest. It was just after 2pm by the time we ate - meaning it took about 50 minutes to enter and find found. Not the greatest start, but given this was a Sunday on the outskirts of Paris with temperatures now peaking at 33C, perhaps not overly surprising.

Covid measures
Just another little word about that pesky virus. Masks seemed to be obligatory on all rides. Interestingly, they have also set up 'zones' whilst walking around where masks are obligatory, with the rest of the pathways only being recommended. Hand sanitising points were all around, and particularly just before you got on a ride, and social distancing was recommended to be 1.5m (though, as was rather common in France seemingly, not really adhered to much!).
 

After eating, the first stop was Dragon Chinois, one of the park's two Soquets. It has a weird layout, with three "lift hills", if you can even call them that, and honestly not much else. Wasn't the most exciting thing in the world. I didn't even get a photo of it...though that was in part down to me eating my lunch, and having my ice cold drink, a bit too quickly I think..!

We would have done Machine à Vapeur, their powered Soquet, next. But alas, it was closed, and has been for a while it seems. The first spite of the trip! Fortunately, having got the alpine cred the day before, I was still on track for hitting 200 creds, but I would need no more spites...  
Spite 💔

Instead, we moved over to Speed Rockets, their Gerstlauer bobsled. The ride had a long, almost full queue, and a little bit of downtime, but we were on quick enough. Given the park can't go above tree height, the ride does a good enough job with it's restrictions. But it's still probably the weakest one of these I've done - it just doesn't have much to offer. But the weird double down drop element is fun - would love to experience more of these!  
Weird-but-fun mini double down!

Carrying on with the cred-theme, Souris Mécaniques, their junior Reverchon spinner, packs a little punch. Due to the park's '2 adult per car' rule, I was in a car by myself. For such a short and weird layout, I got a surprising amount of spin in my car. Not something I particularly enjoyed, but if spinning is your thing, I'd guess that would be..

None of the creds were worth a re-ride, and all had very long queues, so we took the opportunity to just wander round the place and do a few of their smaller rides, including their cute little boat ride. A stand out in terms of rides was Kinetorium, their shooter. Another 'sit on a saddle in front of a screen with 20 other people' experience, this had a pretty cool pre show (with not-perfect English subtitles) explaining the story: some biology thing gone wrong basically. The system was much better than Bocasse's one (it actually worked with a room full of people!), and the story and video were much better. A fun little experience; so much so that we did re-ride it.
 


Originally, Jardin was meant to close at 7pm, with rides shutting at half 6, but clearly due to the weather and how busy it was, they extended both closures by an hour! However, by 5pm we were pretty much done - with nothing worth doing again and having explored around the non-ride side of things, along with the beating heat and little shade, it was time. Despite some areas only being 'masks recommended', I wore my face covering everywhere on site too, so this was my first time wearing one in hot temperatures - I was fine with it, but certainly appreciated taking it off after a few hours!

Overall thoughts: whilst a nice-looking place, Jar-da didn't do much for me. They've done great to integrate a park into the surroundings, but yeah, it doesn't do it for me. The really hot weather probably didn't help either tbh. Glad to have gone and experienced it though. I was also surprised at how few English signs were about, and how little English staff seemed to speak. Given the location, I expected some more multi-lingual-ness. I guess it's not big with tourists given the location and what it is, but still, surprised me a little. Didn't affect my day as I was able to get by with my limited French, but yeah, surprising.

Another Premiere Class Hotel awaited us, and this one was ever so slightly better than our previous one! Still not good enough to warrant spending an evening in it, so after another Buffalo Grill meal, we headed to a nearby bowling centre which was open. One of the group is a big bowling fan, but since he hadn't had the chance to bowl for a few months, I thought this might be the perfect opportunity to come close to his score...
  ...seemingly not!

And with that disappointment, Day 3 drew to a close. Day 4 brings more disappointment, as there's no Soquets, but I'm sure being at Parc Asterix will compensate for that, right..?

With the 'new normal' in full swing and parks open again, I'd been itching for a European trip again. With my Heide/Hansa trip back in April cancelled, and my June Europa trip delayed before I booked, the Covid situation had dented some big plans for new parks for me.

However, wanting to remain cautious, I didn't want to swing into big parks, and risk not visiting them in case something happened (having to self-isolate, a park randomly closing, etc). So something I bit smaller was needed. Back in 2017, I visited Bagatelle, and really enjoyed their two Soquet creds - Gaz Express (as I mentioned about here)and Spirale des Dunes, and had joked with my housemates in the past of doing a trip to hunt out more of their creds. And lo and behold, this trip was born!

A few smaller French parks could be ticked off, boosting my cred count, and also a first visit to Parc Asterix, just to add some real quality to the trip too. And, if all worked out perfectly, I would end the trip on exactly 200 creds, becoming slightly less basic in the process.

Keeping the costs down meant we stayed at Premier Class hotels whilst in France, and anyone who's visited one will know they're certainly not premiere in class (we fortunately knew that in advance)..More on that later though!

Day 0
We travelled over to Calais Thursday afternoon by ferry with P&O, which was sadly delayed by a couple of hours. As for their Covid measures, it was pretty simple: wear a mask on the ferry at all times (except if eating/drinking), and keep 2m distance from everyone. Keeping the distance was easy as the ferry was quiet, and I wore a mask all the time - little warm, but no issue. Lots of people did end up taking their masks off, but given how quiet it was, I wasn't surprised.
 
To encourage social distancing, each table in the main seating area only had 1 seat, which made no sense when a group wanted to sit together...

We arrived at our first Premiere Class, where we had upgraded to a room which gave us breakfast and a sea view for only a couple of Euros extra. We were intrigued, but the sea view was, well...
 
A little lacking to say the least!

Coincidentally, each Premiere Class we stayed at had a Buffalo Grill restaurant very nearby. An American-esque BBQ style place, we decided that Day 0 would be the perfect time to try it out, and it was pretty good! On the pricier side for a budget trip, but decent food, including amazing Mozzarella sticks with BBQ sauce!

Day 1 - Parc du Bocasse
Unsure of how Covid measures would affect park capacities and throughputs, we decided to give each park a day, and then do other stuff in the afternoon/evening if time allowed (spoilers: we regularly left parks early!). Parc du Bocasse was park number 1, we arrived a little before 10, with rides opening at half 10.

Covid Measures
The park had a variety of signs which said whether a ride/queue/building required masks or simply recommended them. The queues had social distancing markers, and there were hand sanitising points before going on a ride, and sometimes afterwards. There was no social distancing on rides. Masks weren't required in the park's walkways. Their 4D cinema was closed, but everything else remained open.

Social distancing was largely respected in queue lines which was nice. I wore my mask everywhere except on water rides (where we always were in our own group anyway).
    A quick bag check and we were in, and wandered to the back of the park towards their pirate area.

We ticked off the kiddie cred and some of the flats, along with their shooting ride - Pirate's Plunder. It's the first time I've done one of these types: where you are on a seat which tilts and moves and fire at a stationary screen. I quite enjoyed it, and liked the competitive nature it had throughout. We did it later in the day, and sadly it didn't cope when the room was almost full, with none of our guns registering properly.

We worked through the park, ticking off their other family cred, and came up to arguably their major cred - Fort d'Odin, their Soquet. The ride looked fun from its rcdb entry, and it had been rethemed last year. However, I wasn't prepared for how extensive the retheme was:
 
My photos don't do it enough justice - but it feels completely different compared to the rcdb photos!

It was a fun ride. Whilst nothing special of course, it at least gave us some reassurance we hadn't planned a trip based entirely around a manufacturer which makes terrible rides, bar two at some random small park!

We continued, doing their dark ride Apiland, which has a ton of animatronics, but goes on way too long, before arriving back to the front of the park, which is a Dinosaur / Jurassic themed land. I think a few years ago this was pretty unthemed and had a 'plonked in a car park' feel, but looks a lot better now. We did their Spinning Wild Mouse, which was vile due to us distributing the weight badly (I'm really not a fan of spinning).  
We then moved to their log flume, which is also a Soquet, Splash-o-Saure. It features a backwards section and a vertical lift, and some nice theming. It was the right level of wet too. Little on the short side, but really enjoyed it to be honest.  

This took us up the lunch time, and aside from the park's fountain show, which first showed at 2pm, we had done the park. After a spot of food and some rerides, we milled around and eventually queued up for Symphonie Aquatique, which was surprisingly hosted indoors. The show was about 10-15mins long, and featured a stage with some fountains which were just going off pretty consistently, whilst some lasers and music played. The concept is cool, but it misses the mark with the fountains being boring, and all the seats being on the same level, so being at the back meant we saw little.

After milling around a bit more and a couple more re-rides, we called it a day just after 3pm. Parc du Bocasse was a surprisingly nice park, with some decent theming and a nice little selection of rides. It always seems like they're preparing to expand, with work going on next to their log flume. It'll be interesting to see what they do next!

One annoying thing though - bugs! There were a ton around the park. I don't know what they were; tiny little fly-like things? I guess it's because of the park's location, but it was a little bit annoying after a while, especially since the colour of my shorts seemed to really attract them!


We then headed into Rouen, which was en route to our next hotel. We popped into a Laser Quest, and the three of us played a game - just us three! Their Covid measures meant we still had to wear masks inside. And let's just say, if I can wear a mask for 20 minutes whilst running around indoors playing Laser Quest, I don't see why any normal person can't wear one!

Our next Premiere Class would be our base for two nights, and didn't promise a sea view, being far away from the sea and all that, so we weren't disappointed. Fortunately there were lots of restaurants and shops nearby which meant we had plenty of options to keep ourselves entertained for the evening, before turning in for the night.

Coming to a blog post near you: Day 2 - Festyland, and a surprise cred...   ---   Which, in fact, is right here!!
Day 2 - Festyland...

A quick mention of their Covid measures. There were social distancing markers in queue lines and a few signs about wearing masks.There didn't seem to be as many people wearing masks and social distancing in queue lines wasn't the best, but equally not the worst. Many of the operators at rides had unlabelled bottles of liquid, which they would spray onto your hands before going on rides. I can only hope it was hand sanitiser! Though I'm sure I could start a conspiracy theory somewhere on the internet saying it's some mind control liquid to stop us thinking about 5G or something....

Anyways, onto the park. We arrived shortly after opening and headed straight to the back of the park, where the first of two Soquets awaited, 1066...
  The building looks cool, but the signage leaves a little to be desired!

Unlike other Soquets, this ran two short trains, which was a little bit of a surprise. It's also nicely situated on the edge of the park towards a field, meaning it could make use of the terrain a bit more. The ride was a walk on so I went straight to the back for my first ride. And damn, this little cred packed a bit of a punch. Coming off the drop gave some solid ejector. The ride then turns around a bit before going into a helix which gave some really nice laterals. An airtime hill with a kicker wheel followed, which sadly meant not much airtime. Another helix and a jump up into the station followed, which again gave some nice laterals.
 
So all in all, a really neat cred. It was the right level and mix of weird and fun that I had expected. The area still had no one else around, which meant another lap followed, with me heading to the front. The drop wasn't as good, but the laterals and side to side movement were still solid.

Sticking to the back of the park, the next port of call was Kaskade, the park's rapids. It very much has a budget River Quest feel, with an elevator lift and intimidating (in context of the park) look. The drop lead to some of the craziest spinning I've ever had on a water ride, and the final splash gets you a good level of wet too. A solid ride, and a nice little gem in the park.   We moved over to the park's other cred, Drakkar Express. This is nothing more than a +1, but features a drop halfway through the layout where you somehow manage to slow down rather than speed up I swear. Oh Soquet...
 
The park have a really neat, large and well themed Viking land, which features a few rides, including an Air Race-like ride, Rocking Tug and more. We ticked off these rides, as well as their standard dingy slide and drop tower rides, before a re-ride on 1066.
   

Fun fact: I did get the standard photo of me holding this, etc. BUT this was shortly after Kaskade, and so I had a huge wet patch down half my body, which looked like a massive sweat mark, and so will never see the light of day...

It was now midday and the park was filling up a fair bit (Kaskade had a full queue, which probably would have taken a good 30+minutes given the lack of boats). We did a ride on their bumper boats, which we didn't think adults would be allowed on, but they didn't seem to mind. One of our group fell into the water whilst getting out, much to the enjoyment of everyone in the queue!

So after barely two hours, we called it a day at Festyland. It's a cute little park with some surprisingly well themed parts, and 1066 is a solid ride. But ultimately, it isn't much more than a stop on a cred run for us.

Anticipating that this could well happen, we had made contingency plans the night prior, and thanks to leaflets at our hotel and coast2coaster, we found a couple of Alpine coasters near-ish to the park. Both were about a 40 minutes drive away, and 40 minutes away from each other. We ultimately opted to do just one, and so of we headed to the...

Normandie-Luge
Located in the valley of an old Viaduct designed in 1887 by Gustave Eiffel, this was a complex of activities. The Viaduc de la Souleuvre is the name of the wider, free-to-enter, complex, and has activities such as bungee jumping, giant swings and zip lining from the top of the viaduct, as well as the cred, a high ropes course and other things. Unsurprisingly the likes of bungee jumping were very expensive (149€!!), but the cred was just 4€..much more reasonable.
  After eating at the onsite restaurant, which was fantastic and well priced, we hit up the Luge, as they like to call the cred specifically. No need to wear masks, but you have to clean your hands before, as well as the 'car' being cleaned as well. The layout makes excellent use of the terrain, and features some decent sweeping turns and banked moments, as well as some pops of airtime. Fortunately was able to go full speed all the way down, and the ending was a particular highlight!
The ending

You can also buy a photo for 2€. Since it captured the exact moment a fly decided to try and get in my mouth, I couldn't refuse...

After a little bit of milling around and watching people bungee jump, we moved on. Not a place I'd ever return to (as awesome as it would be to jump from a viaduct, I can't justify paying seven times what I paid for my bungee jump a few years back...even if it was off a crane in a pub car park). But I certainly would recommend heading down there for the alpine cred if you're nearby!   We left and headed to the commune of Deauville by the sea, which was only 15 or so minutes away from our hotel. It's a seaside place, but our only reason for going there was to play some mini golf, which seemed to be the only one anywhere vaguely nearby. It was a very open circuit, but had some decent courses.
And that concludes Day 2. We eventually got back to our hotel at about 7 (how we dragged out an entire from Festyland, an alpine cred and mini golf I'm still not quiet sure..), before food and sleep.

Day 3 to come in a new blog entry very soon, featuring the somewhat controversial Parc Saint Paul, and an unplanned park (or rather, an unplanned garden)...

Some love it, others love to hate it. That’s Thorpe Park! Home to numerous attractions, some are delightful, others are worse than that Hunchback Of Notre Dame sequel and a few are just alright. 
  Here’s my honest and “potentially” spoiler inducing opinions on the Island’s current offering.   27/ Wet Wet Wet 
Literally says what it does on the tin. You go down a slide and then get wet, wet, wet. Mind blown, who would’ve thought it! Next you’ll tell me it’s only intended for kids. Oh wait, it is.   Pros/ It’s existence    Cons/ It’s not for adults. Sorry Martin!   26/ Amity Beach  Who needs Brighton when there’s a whole  beach to explore on here. If you ignore the ageing rock-work and everything behind, it  feels like being at the sea side minus the good parts. Forgot the kids? Keep walking!   Pros/  It’s flat settlement gives you a view of the better attractions when you enter the park   Cons/  Serves no purpose for the majority of park goers    25/ Lumber Jump  “He’s a lumber jump and he’s ok, he sleeps all night and he works all day!” Ok, I’ll cut to the chase, I haven’t actually ridden this and it had to go somewhere, so here it is! Yay, mini drop towers!   Pros/ Ideal if you are a kid or hate large rides!   Cons/ Somewhat out of place and largely overlooked by adults, unless your a donut!   24/ Derren Brown’s Ghost Train Rise Of The Demon  One of the thins once largely talked about was how Thorpe was lacking a proper dark ride/experience attraction. Sadly this wasn’t the ride that would resolve this.   Don’t get me wrong, there are some cool features such as the floating carriage and added finale. However a lot of the attraction is purely a tonne of ideas executed in the wrong way, temperamental and already dated technology plus one of the most bland and tedious attractions to queue for! Not to mention it’s budget, resources and evidential failure have prevented Thorpe getting any noticeable investment until the end of time!   I’m usually someone who loves dark ride type attractions, but not this. Such a shame one of the best themed shops was paired with one of the worst rides. Plus given the state of things, I can’t really see this surviving much longer, if it hasn’t already received it’s death certificate. Darn I miss Wicked Witches Haunt!   Pros/ It keeps you out of the rain and has a shop themed almost as good as the Disney store   Cons/ Almost everything, making it the biggest failure in theme park history since Disneyland’s Rocket  Rods but actually much worse in the long run!   23/ Timber Tug Rockin Tugs are remarkably popular and pleasantly themed in some parks. Sadly this isn’t one of them and sits as a reminder questioning most of the park’s choices in recent years!   Pros/ It’s better than Derren Brown’s Ghost Train (for what it’s trying to be)   Cons/ The ride looks like it came from a sea life attraction and was shoehorned into whatever space was physically available. Oh wait! 22/ Storm Surge  This ride seems to have a cult of hatred from enthusiasts. It’s literally located slap bang in the middle of the park, looks worse than Staines on a Friday night and spends most of the ride soaking your feet like some strange paddling pool. Still theres some positives. It’s fun for groups , gives you decent  views whilst you slowly ascend with a foot massage amongst a short part of the ride actually being  enjoyable.    Pros/ It’s the nearest I might ever get to Florida    Cons/ If I wanted to get my feet wet I’d jump in a puddle!   21/ Depth Charge  Many Thorpe classics from the pre-Tussauds/Merlin eras have bitten the dust over the years. Depth Charge since however long  has managed to the bullet. It’s lengthy queues, low throughput and short duration don’t put this high on many lists. Even the staff probably don’t enjoy working on it.    However as RMC’s (not the manufacturer) footprints on the park lessen over time, one must still look in awe over this attraction contributing to what’s there today and remembering park  days of old. This might well be the last of it’s time to meet the bulldozer!   Pros/ The ride hasn’t changed a bit in it’s almost 30 years of existence    Cons/ Some of the better RMC era attractions met wits end before this one! 20/ Mr Monkeys Banana Ride The lone surviving attraction belonging  to the parks long forgotten mascots. The banana ride isn’t the biggest or the best of it’s ride type but for now leaves guests with one of the last examples of what the park used to be before taking on it’s thrill seeking routes.   Pros/ Is conveniently located opposite Inferno’s shop/exit    Cons/ It’s not much of a pirate ship!   19/ Zodiac  The ride that turned Thorpe upside down. Primarily because it was the first inverting ride for the park. The original was actually replaced in 2006 with a newer model from Drayton Manor due to reliability issues. It isn’t as scary as it looks, however  the lack of restraint can be intimidating  and may make you feel more nauseated than a heavy night out in Staines!   Pros/ An ideal ride to progress with for wannabe thrill seekers    Cons/ Likely a flat supporter because it no longer goes 360    18/ Angry Birds 4D Years after the Pirates finished their voyage, a new flock of inhabitants took over the theatre. The attraction is simplistic yet effective and follows a quest between good and evil featuring a few effects along the way. It’s cheesy but makes for a pleasant break from the thrills.   Pros/ Offers some great staff interaction on a good day    Cons/ Watching Pirates 4D in German is still marginally more enjoyable    17/ King Pig’s Dodgems  Essentially a fairground ride but fun nonetheless. The setup of bird verses pigs helps for some fun and tactical bumping. The rubbery smell is strangely appeasing.   Pros/ The Power pedal feels decent   Cons/ The old ride bell sounded better  16/ Saw-The Ride  We’ve reached our first coaster. Sore, I mean Saw. They really nailed the horror theme with the waiting times, gum infested queues and rough rattly experience. I actually like (not love), the indoor section and the airtime Hill is quite fun too I suppose. As for the rest, it’s a little bit uncomfortable. Yay to the park’s most successful ride!
  Pros/ It features one the few working Park animatronics    Cons/ Shamefully stands where a GCI should’ve been alongside a saved Loggers (RIP)   15/ Rumba Rapids  This attraction features some of the most rapid (pun intended) history of the  surviving attractions. It’s theme was simple yet effective when it opened in 87 before becoming more vibrant and whacky with Ribena sponsorship fifteen years later. Sadly the ride has become watered down (I’m sorry :p), thanks to removed effects, an absence of TLC and an unsuccessful retheme in recent years! Sadly the track record of these rides hasn’t helped either.   Pros/ Doesn’t soak your feet like Storm Surge   Cons/ Water quality leaves a lot to be desired, plus doesn’t run at night anymore   14/ Samurai This is a sick ride, because it can make you vomit. I almost did on my first time  which I blame on  sweets and cola. The U.K. has lost a lot of flat rides over the years, especially top scans which makes Samurai top class now. I rarely ride but I know others do and they like it a lot.   Pros/
Has cheated death more than James Bond    Cons/ Worse at parking than Mr Fish 13/ Storm In A Teacup  Bow ye tops lads because we’re on to a right Classic now! Before the Tetley invasion the ride was known as the Teacup Twisters before losing it’s handle when it was rethemed to fit in with Stealth. It’s also the oldest attraction, having opened in 1986. This ride needs a pin!   Pros/ Probably the most iconic surviving RMC attraction    Cons/ The cups are difficult to spin these days, especially being stiffer than Merlin’s Park budget   12/ Rocky Express Some say it has cult status with Park fanboys and you’d be right. Rocky dominates what’s left of this ailing area giving off a perfectly balanced cycle to the soundtrack of Beetle Juice. It’s almost enough to distract you from the Loggers graveyard next door!   Pros/ The best ride in the park that features trains in the theme    Cons/ Doesn’t get enough ridership due to being in a ghost town these days (pun intended) 11/ Flying Fish  The park’s only non-thrilling roller coaster. Originally from outer space and the across the pond, the Fish lives on in it’s third  form. Lacking the interaction and scenery from it’s last home it’s a bit like a movie remake, it isn’t as good as the original but still serves enjoyment value.   Pros/ Snazzy yet comfortable trains   Cons/ The announcements are almost as annoying as YouTube ads! 10/ Colossus  A ride that put the park on the map and firmly lead the park into the thrill market. Ten inversions lie ahead to riders, some more comfortable than others and that’s if you can fit in the trains which are more tightly packed than a cotswold sleeping bag. It breaks records but breaks down too sometimes.   Pros/ Features some of the best park landscaping    Cons/ Might have one of the worst designed coaster trains. Thanks Intamin!   9/ Vortex  Part of the flat pack that began the park’s thrill seeker journey. It may not reach the levels of newer model types such as Loke but still holds it’s ground relatively well. It’s dome and lakeside views make for some fitting interaction.   Pros/  If you look at the floor correctly when it lowers, it’s like you are lifting up   Cons/ The ride’s restraint system has a grudge against people of a certain build  8/ Rush When playground swings become less exciting Rush is the best thing. The lap bar restraints certainly provide a unique feeling especially on it’s top three swings!   Pros/  This ride actually still intimidates me to this day    Cons/ Sky Hawk is better because you can actually see the seat numbers    7/ The Walking Dead The Ride A ride which has seen  almost as many regenerations as Dr Who. It started backwards, then forwards and then became horror themed returning it’s original height restriction, so backwards. However I actually enjoy this ride and the new theme makes it something of an experience now.   Pros/ The park finally has an experience attraction it has always needed   Cons/ I think the park might have just a few too many dark themes now! 6/ Quantum  Arguably the most underrated ride in the park. As most attractions dominate the sky line, Quantum quietly waits in the corner for riders before doing it’s thing and what the ride does is great indeed. It’s fast, thrilling but most importantly fun. If I had to bulldoze all of Lost City and save just one attraction I would easily choose this. No joke.   Pros/ Packs quite a punch   Cons/ Was closed for almost all of 2019. I feel robbed! 5/ Tidal Wave  Given the state of things, this may be the best (operating) water ride in the country. It’s position dominates the surrounding area with criminally underrated theming, even if some has been ruined a little! But more importantly it gets you soaking wet, like a hundred tipping buckets hitting you at once.   Pros/ The soundtrack is something of a masterpiece   Cons/ Can only be ridden for two months of the year for most because it isn’t America!   4/ Detonator  I’ve done drop towers across the world and few come close to this one. You get some great aerial views here before you are released with a unique free fall feeling perhaps comparable to a reverse rocket lunch!   Pros/ A free fall like no other!   Cons/ The original music was better! 3/ The Swarm  Swarm is a quality ride. It’s smooth, reasonably themed but most importantly a B&M which has already become better with age (not Dragon Khan). Shame it wasn’t as successful as first hoped.   Pros/ The ride works better running forwards   Cons/
It’s station is an apocalyptic mess given the removed and dilapidated theming  2/ Stealth  Launching into second is the park’s accelerator (and arguable icon). Stealth really dominates the park  and can even be seen from the M25! It may be a one trick pony to some but the launch packs a punch and the views/feelings from above being astounding. I actually prefer this to Red Farce and I’m not saying this because I mostly detest Port Av.   Pros/ Probably my favourite accelerator coaster that isn’t Top Thrill Dragster   Cons/ It Isn’t Top Thrill Dragster 1/ Nemesis Inferno  The ride that made me fall in love with Thorpe Park again, not to mention B&Ms. I still remember first going on this and given I did it six times on the same trip perhaps says volumes in it’s self. All these years later and Inferno has only gotten better with age.     Pros/ The mist tunnel is sublime when  running properly    Cons/ The Inbetweeners  Thorpe Park episode has some inaccuracies     Thanks for a reading a review like no other!   TLDR- some photos not mine.

It's been a long while since I've done a proper blog post, but I've dusted off my keyboard to do one I'd been thinking about for a while..
 
Over the past couple of years, there's some rides I've done which are a ton of fun, but don't really seem to get the attention they deserve. Mostly for reasons that they're rides in parks that aren't high up people's lists, or there's better rides at those parks. So I figured I'd just throw a little list out there.
 
This isn't going to be a list of "under-hyped" rides; I'm not necessarily saying any of these are top-tier rides which everyone should ride. But these are just solid rides which deserve a bit of limelight cast of them...
 
5. Gaz Express, Parc Bagatelle 
Situated about an hour from Calais, Bagatelle's ease to get to doesn't compensate for the fact the park is quite meh. However, Gaz Express is a shining beacon of light.
 
Manufactured by French company Soquet in 1987, Gaz Express is a really fun family-thrill coaster which is situated largely over water. It's not particularly high or fast, but features a couple of nice pops of airtime, some nice helices, whilst also diving in and out of buildings. And you get to go round twice too! To top it off, there's loads of water features around the ride, as well as a really cool fire effect, making it a really nice-looking ride for spectators too!
 



 
4. Discovery Club, Avonturenpark Hellendoorn
It's no secret that I look shooting dark rides, and this one is really quirky. Sitting in outward-facing circular cars, the idea is that you're basically exploring a house with loads of spooky stuff that could come alive. It's a classic storyline which works, and with a fun soundtrack and sound effects, good theming and the unpredictable, and sometimes wild, spinning of the cars, it makes for a great experience.
 
Hellendoorn itself is a decent park, a little under-rated in my opinion, but this 21 year old Mack dark ride is probably the crowning jewel of the park!


 
3. Kyöpelinvuoren Hotelli, Linnanmäki
This ghost train has no right to be as good as it frankly. For a city park like Linnanmäki which doesn't really *do* theming, it stands out really well. And inside, it's just immaculately themed and styled - it's creepy from the word go.
 
The ride itself is pretty fantastic. Good length, no dead spots, lots of turns and plenty of surprises and special effects. It just hits the nail on the head at every point. I believe it was refreshed a few years back, which, along with the likes of Taiga, shows that when the park sets itself a target, they hit it perfectly.

 
2. Popcorn Revenge, Walibi Belgium
I've talked about Popcorn Revenge a lot on here, so another paragraph or two won't hurt.
 
Popcorn Revenge is genuinely bloody brilliant. Early I said this list wasn't necessarily going to be about top-tier rides. Popcorn Revenge is perhaps the exception here. For those who don't know, this is a trackless, screen-based shooting dark ride, which takes around a movie theatre where pieces of popcorn have come alive and have taken over the film. You have to shot the popcorn with different flavoured sauce guns to take back control. The ride is non-linear and where you go depends on what car you get in. 
 
The scenes on the screens are brilliant. The real theming is great as well. This all just comes together for an absolutely brilliant ride experience.
 
I truly hope I'm not over-stating this and setting anyone who eventually rides it up for a disappointing, but this is genuinely one of my favourite rides and it's a damn shame it's not talked about more frankly.


 
1. K2, Karls Erlebnis-Dorf Elstal
This is also something I've talked about a bit before in the past. 
 
Karls is, primarily, a strawberry farm business. However, they have branched out over the years to have permanent farmer markets, which have also integrated 'amusement park' style sections. The one in Elstal, just outside Berlin, is the most developed, and by far the crowning jewel is K2.
 
K2 is an abc tube coaster, which also has wooden cars. The ride is themed to potato farming, and features an underground dark ride section where you see potatoes being grown, amongst other surprises. The ride then goes up 80ft high - which feels a lot higher when you only have a seatbelt as your restraint in a wooden cart! - before going round twists, turns and mini airtime hills. The ride is killed a bit by a MCBR, but is still great fun, and a real surprise. 
 
The quality of the theming is amazing too, and wouldn't look out of place at the likes of Phantasialand (indeed, the queue is of a similar style and standard to Maus au Chocolat). Just in general, this ride ticks every single box and it's an absolute joy and treasure to experience. If you ever head to Berlin and want a quick theme park-like fix, this really is the place to go (certainly much better than the nearby 'proper' parks!).


 

Some love it, others love to hate it. That’s Thorpe Park! Home to numerous attractions, some are delightful, others are worse than that Hunchback Of Notre Dame sequel and a few are just alright. 
  Here’s my honest and “potentially” spoiler inducing opinions on the Island’s current offering.   27/ Wet Wet Wet 
Literally says what it does on the tin. You go down a slide and then get wet, wet, wet. Mind blown, who would’ve thought it! Next you’ll tell me it’s only intended for kids. Oh wait, it is.   Pros/ It’s existence    Cons/ It’s not for adults. Sorry Martin!   26/ Amity Beach  Who needs Brighton when there’s a whole  beach to explore on here. If you ignore the ageing rock-work and everything behind, it  feels like being at the sea side minus the good parts. Forgot the kids? Keep walking!   Pros/  It’s flat settlement gives you a view of the better attractions when you enter the park   Cons/  Serves no purpose for the majority of park goers    25/ Lumber Jump  “He’s a lumber jump and he’s ok, he sleeps all night and he works all day!” Ok, I’ll cut to the chase, I haven’t actually ridden this and it had to go somewhere, so here it is! Yay, mini drop towers!   Pros/ Ideal if you are a kid or hate large rides!   Cons/ Somewhat out of place and largely overlooked by adults, unless your a donut!   24/ Derren Brown’s Ghost Train Rise Of The Demon  One of the thins once largely talked about was how Thorpe was lacking a proper dark ride/experience attraction. Sadly this wasn’t the ride that would resolve this.   Don’t get me wrong, there are some cool features such as the floating carriage and added finale. However a lot of the attraction is purely a tonne of ideas executed in the wrong way, temperamental and already dated technology plus one of the most bland and tedious attractions to queue for! Not to mention it’s budget, resources and evidential failure have prevented Thorpe getting any noticeable investment until the end of time!   I’m usually someone who loves dark ride type attractions, but not this. Such a shame one of the best themed shops was paired with one of the worst rides. Plus given the state of things, I can’t really see this surviving much longer, if it hasn’t already received it’s death certificate. Darn I miss Wicked Witches Haunt!   Pros/ It keeps you out of the rain and has a shop themed almost as good as the Disney store   Cons/ Almost everything, making it the biggest failure in theme park history since Disneyland’s Rocket  Rods but actually much worse in the long run!   23/ Timber Tug Rockin Tugs are remarkably popular and pleasantly themed in some parks. Sadly this isn’t one of them and sits as a reminder questioning most of the park’s choices in recent years!   Pros/ It’s better than Derren Brown’s Ghost Train (for what it’s trying to be)   Cons/ The ride looks like it came from a sea life attraction and was shoehorned into whatever space was physically available. Oh wait! 22/ Storm Surge  This ride seems to have a cult of hatred from enthusiasts. It’s literally located slap bang in the middle of the park, looks worse than Staines on a Friday night and spends most of the ride soaking your feet like some strange paddling pool. Still theres some positives. It’s fun for groups , gives you decent  views whilst you slowly ascend with a foot massage amongst a short part of the ride actually being  enjoyable.    Pros/ It’s the nearest I might ever get to Florida    Cons/ If I wanted to get my feet wet I’d jump in a puddle!   21/ Depth Charge  Many Thorpe classics from the pre-Tussauds/Merlin eras have bitten the dust over the years. Depth Charge since however long  has managed to the bullet. It’s lengthy queues, low throughput and short duration don’t put this high on many lists. Even the staff probably don’t enjoy working on it.    However as RMC’s (not the manufacturer) footprints on the park lessen over time, one must still look in awe over this attraction contributing to what’s there today and remembering park  days of old. This might well be the last of it’s time to meet the bulldozer!   Pros/ The ride hasn’t changed a bit in it’s almost 30 years of existence    Cons/ Some of the better RMC era attractions met wits end before this one! 20/ Mr Monkeys Banana Ride The lone surviving attraction belonging  to the parks long forgotten mascots. The banana ride isn’t the biggest or the best of it’s ride type but for now leaves guests with one of the last examples of what the park used to be before taking on it’s thrill seeking routes.   Pros/ Is conveniently located opposite Inferno’s shop/exit    Cons/ It’s not much of a pirate ship!   19/ Zodiac  The ride that turned Thorpe upside down. Primarily because it was the first inverting ride for the park. The original was actually replaced in 2006 with a newer model from Drayton Manor due to reliability issues. It isn’t as scary as it looks, however  the lack of restraint can be intimidating  and may make you feel more nauseated than a heavy night out in Staines!   Pros/ An ideal ride to progress with for wannabe thrill seekers    Cons/ Likely a flat supporter because it no longer goes 360    18/ Angry Birds 4D Years after the Pirates finished their voyage, a new flock of inhabitants took over the theatre. The attraction is simplistic yet effective and follows a quest between good and evil featuring a few effects along the way. It’s cheesy but makes for a pleasant break from the thrills.   Pros/ Offers some great staff interaction on a good day    Cons/ Watching Pirates 4D in German is still marginally more enjoyable    17/ King Pig’s Dodgems  Essentially a fairground ride but fun nonetheless. The setup of bird verses pigs helps for some fun and tactical bumping. The rubbery smell is strangely appeasing.   Pros/ The Power pedal feels decent   Cons/ The old ride bell sounded better  16/ Saw-The Ride  We’ve reached our first coaster. Sore, I mean Saw. They really nailed the horror theme with the waiting times, gum infested queues and rough rattly experience. I actually like (not love), the indoor section and the airtime Hill is quite fun too I suppose. As for the rest, it’s a little bit uncomfortable. Yay to the park’s most successful ride!
  Pros/ It features one the few working Park animatronics    Cons/ Shamefully stands where a GCI should’ve been alongside a saved Loggers (RIP)   15/ Rumba Rapids  This attraction features some of the most rapid (pun intended) history of the  surviving attractions. It’s theme was simple yet effective when it opened in 87 before becoming more vibrant and whacky with Ribena sponsorship fifteen years later. Sadly the ride has become watered down (I’m sorry :p), thanks to removed effects, an absence of TLC and an unsuccessful retheme in recent years! Sadly the track record of these rides hasn’t helped either.   Pros/ Doesn’t soak your feet like Storm Surge   Cons/ Water quality leaves a lot to be desired, plus doesn’t run at night anymore   14/ Samurai This is a sick ride, because it can make you vomit. I almost did on my first time  which I blame on  sweets and cola. The U.K. has lost a lot of flat rides over the years, especially top scans which makes Samurai top class now. I rarely ride but I know others do and they like it a lot.   Pros/
Has cheated death more than James Bond    Cons/ Worse at parking than Mr Fish 13/ Storm In A Teacup  Bow ye tops lads because we’re on to a right Classic now! Before the Tetley invasion the ride was known as the Teacup Twisters before losing it’s handle when it was rethemed to fit in with Stealth. It’s also the oldest attraction, having opened in 1986. This ride needs a pin!   Pros/ Probably the most iconic surviving RMC attraction    Cons/ The cups are difficult to spin these days, especially being stiffer than Merlin’s Park budget   12/ Rocky Express Some say it has cult status with Park fanboys and you’d be right. Rocky dominates what’s left of this ailing area giving off a perfectly balanced cycle to the soundtrack of Beetle Juice. It’s almost enough to distract you from the Loggers graveyard next door!   Pros/ The best ride in the park that features trains in the theme    Cons/ Doesn’t get enough ridership due to being in a ghost town these days (pun intended) 11/ Flying Fish  The park’s only non-thrilling roller coaster. Originally from outer space and the across the pond, the Fish lives on in it’s third  form. Lacking the interaction and scenery from it’s last home it’s a bit like a movie remake, it isn’t as good as the original but still serves enjoyment value.   Pros/ Snazzy yet comfortable trains   Cons/ The announcements are almost as annoying as YouTube ads! 10/ Colossus  A ride that put the park on the map and firmly lead the park into the thrill market. Ten inversions lie ahead to riders, some more comfortable than others and that’s if you can fit in the trains which are more tightly packed than a cotswold sleeping bag. It breaks records but breaks down too sometimes.   Pros/ Features some of the best park landscaping    Cons/ Might have one of the worst designed coaster trains. Thanks Intamin!   9/ Vortex  Part of the flat pack that began the park’s thrill seeker journey. It may not reach the levels of newer model types such as Loke but still holds it’s ground relatively well. It’s dome and lakeside views make for some fitting interaction.   Pros/  If you look at the floor correctly when it lowers, it’s like you are lifting up   Cons/ The ride’s restraint system has a grudge against people of a certain build  8/ Rush When playground swings become less exciting Rush is the best thing. The lap bar restraints certainly provide a unique feeling especially on it’s top three swings!   Pros/  This ride actually still intimidates me to this day    Cons/ Sky Hawk is better because you can actually see the seat numbers    7/ The Walking Dead The Ride A ride which has seen  almost as many regenerations as Dr Who. It started backwards, then forwards and then became horror themed returning it’s original height restriction, so backwards. However I actually enjoy this ride and the new theme makes it something of an experience now.   Pros/ The park finally has an experience attraction it has always needed   Cons/ I think the park might have just a few too many dark themes now! 6/ Quantum  Arguably the most underrated ride in the park. As most attractions dominate the sky line, Quantum quietly waits in the corner for riders before doing it’s thing and what the ride does is great indeed. It’s fast, thrilling but most importantly fun. If I had to bulldoze all of Lost City and save just one attraction I would easily choose this. No joke.   Pros/ Packs quite a punch   Cons/ Was closed for almost all of 2019. I feel robbed! 5/ Tidal Wave  Given the state of things, this may be the best (operating) water ride in the country. It’s position dominates the surrounding area with criminally underrated theming, even if some has been ruined a little! But more importantly it gets you soaking wet, like a hundred tipping buckets hitting you at once.   Pros/ The soundtrack is something of a masterpiece   Cons/ Can only be ridden for two months of the year for most because it isn’t America!   4/ Detonator  I’ve done drop towers across the world and few come close to this one. You get some great aerial views here before you are released with a unique free fall feeling perhaps comparable to a reverse rocket lunch!   Pros/ A free fall like no other!   Cons/ The original music was better! 3/ The Swarm  Swarm is a quality ride. It’s smooth, reasonably themed but most importantly a B&M which has already become better with age (not Dragon Khan). Shame it wasn’t as successful as first hoped.   Pros/ The ride works better running forwards   Cons/
It’s station is an apocalyptic mess given the removed and dilapidated theming  2/ Stealth  Launching into second is the park’s accelerator (and arguable icon). Stealth really dominates the park  and can even be seen from the M25! It may be a one trick pony to some but the launch packs a punch and the views/feelings from above being astounding. I actually prefer this to Red Farce and I’m not saying this because I mostly detest Port Av.   Pros/ Probably my favourite accelerator coaster that isn’t Top Thrill Dragster   Cons/ It Isn’t Top Thrill Dragster 1/ Nemesis Inferno  The ride that made me fall in love with Thorpe Park again, not to mention B&Ms. I still remember first going on this and given I did it six times on the same trip perhaps says volumes in it’s self. All these years later and Inferno has only gotten better with age.     Pros/ The mist tunnel is sublime when  running properly    Cons/ The Inbetweeners  Thorpe Park episode has some inaccuracies     Thanks for a reading a review like no other!   TLDR- some photos not mine.

In a (usually) ever moving world, parks change and update. Whether that be building attractions themed to blockbuster movies, the latest children’s book or original ideas. whilst new attractions rise, old ones will naturally and unfortunately fall. Due to age, redevelopment or reasons unknown. On the ever-growing list, here’s 10 attractions I wished to have experienced.
  1/ Pirate Adventure- Drayton Manor Theme Park Operated 1990-2015 I have quite a soft spot for dark rides, especially those with a Pirate theme. Pirate Adventure was one of several dark rides to open, taking a spin on the “POTC“Format. For example one scene apparently features a goat instead of a dog. It was one of the biggest park attractions at the time.   It closed around 2015 time on the grounds it was getting repairs, however  never reopened. This was eventually confirmed by park management. In 2020 much of the ride’s props and scenery were sold at an auction, putting a final nail to the coffin.
   I was naturally disappointed I never got to experience this, especially considering I first visited in 2016. It was likely amongst one of the most distinctive and characteristic UK  dark rides in it’s time.    2/ Transdemonium- Parc Asterix  2003-2018 It probably wasn’t the best or most technologically Advanced dark ride, but looked among of the most quirky and original ones out there. Opening in 2003 at a cost of 6 million Euros, it was the park’s only dark ride at the time. The ride system was manufactured by UK based  WGH Transportation with scenery completed by Farmer Studios, who worked on attractions such as Terror Tomb at Chessington.    It’s underground queue and mix of medieval and circus theming, helped it’s unique appeal. Including some random yet hilarious effects such as a random train horn and the exit going out through a demon-like creature. It is believed to not be  the best kept Of attractions, with temporary Halloween theming kept up amongst a determination of speed over time.   In 2019 Transdemonium didn’t open and quietly disappeared off the map. It was believed the attraction was closed for renovations and would reopen for Halloween or in 2020. However park management eventually confirmed it’s permanent closure and started gutting the former attraction. The former space  was used for the park’s winter event to house numerous temporary  attractions.   Missing this Dark ride (so narrowly too) seems one that has hit the most and summarises many things that were happening around that time.    3/ Duelling Dragons/Dragon Challenge- Universal Islands Of Adventure  1999-2017 Once an Orlando icon, but quickly falling from grace. I think the original theme and setting looked great, from it’s compelling backstory to amazing queue-line. Sure, they didn’t have the best layouts but their (once) unique duelling element made for something of a special ride.    It’s clear the ride lost it’s elements over the years. The Potter re-theme  resulted In most of the original theming being removed and never properly fitted in. What’s more, an incident meant it could never duel again. With  lessened appeal and another  Potter addition  planned , it was clear the ride’s days were numbered.    In late 2017 Universal would slay the dragons. Both coasters were scraped, making them the first B&M coasters in history to do so  (if you don’t count Hulk’s re-track). I may be a bit of a Cred hunter, but missing on these unique inverts is definitely a disappointment especially considering my hopeful dreams to visit Orlando  oneday!    4/ Knightmare- Camelot Theme Park  2007-2012 (relocated) I never visited Camelot Theme Park, but heard it was an interesting mixed bag of a park. One of the top draws to the place (for it’s latters years at least) was the installation of Knightmare, a relocated Schwarzkopf from Japan. Sure it lacked much of the impressive facade from it’s former home but was still an impressive attraction for the park it was in.    In 2012 the park closed down and a number of attractions were relocated. Knightmare unfortunately wasn’t and despite rumours of buyers, stayed put where nothing happened. At the start of 2020, the rusting coaster was demolished putting to  rest any hope of relocation. It’s such a shame that such a unique coaster ended up like this, let alone one in the U.K. Schwarzkopf coasters are a dying breed.    5/ The Great Movie Ride- Disney’s Hollywood Studios 1989-2017 One of Disney’s many ambitious projects of the eighties was to open a ‘’Movie themed’’ Park. This would not only fulfil original ideas of a Movie pavilion for Epcot but prepare Disney for it’s increase of competition with  Universal opening a year later.    Situated within a replicant building Of the Los Angeles TCL Chinese Theatre, the ride’s content was just as grand as it’s exterior. Featuring a mixture of live acting, set pieces and animatronics. Mary Poppins and The Wizard Of Oz were amongst the films included.    The ride was cut (no pun intended) from the lineup due to the park’s shift and redevelopment, where things shifted away from movie making and more towards entering the world of movies. A Mickey Mouse is  a great fit, however it is still such a shame  a former grand attraction has been removed, especially being a vocal part to the park when originally opening.   6/ Big Bad Wolf- Busch Gardens Williamsburg  1984-2009 It’s such a shame these coasters are  a dying breed now, especially given how fun they can be. The  Big Bad Wolf was definitely amongst the better models, from it’s beautiful scenery, interaction  remarkable drops. Those POVS make the ride out to be Vampire on steroids.    Hearing  such an iconic ride being torn down was naturally saddening, especially at a time when Vampire was the only suspended coaster I’d experienced. Verbolten looks an adequate successor, but it’s greatest weakness being it isn’t the Big Bad Wolf.    7/ Volcano The Blast Coaster- Kings Dominion 1998-2019 I remember seeing this coaster on countless documentaries and was instantly fascinated by this coaster due to it’s uniqueness. It’s volcanic theming and the fact it was the first LIM launched inverted coaster. It seemed quite a signature attraction for the park.   The ride appeared to have numerous reliability issues and  closed around 2018 to never reopen. In 2019 it was demolished, whilst I’ve been able to ride some of featured documentary rides, this wasn’t one of them!   8/ Eagles Fortress- Everland  1992-2009 Another suspended coaster for the list. If you thought I was obsessed with these attractions, you’d be right!    Less is known about this one than others, but it was believed to be highly unique within a stunning location. The ride’s downward hill position certainly enhanced it’s experience. The attraction became SBNO in 2009. Whilst the reasons are unknown, it is likely as a result of age and maintenance. The ride was demolished six years later. A shame for such a unique looking coaster!   9/ Back To The Future Ride- Universal Studios  Orlando  1990-2007 The Back To The Future Ride was probably amongst the most popular and iconic attractions at Universal parks back in the day. I remember hearing about this ride  in primary school, years before I became a proper park enthusiast.    Whilst it would probably look dated now, it’s such a shame this unique attraction was shuttered especially being such a big fan of all the movies. As much of a fan I am of The Simpson’s (which replaced it), it’s replacement looks somewhat inferior and appealing to what was there before. Least the train theming still exists.    10/ The Never Ending Story Rapids- Movie Park Germany (formerly Warner Bros Movie World) 1995-2004 Or Earlier Never Ending Story was one of the biggest fantasy films of the eighties. Although I only watched it for the first time 3/4 years ago, I instantly became obsessed with the movie from it’s unique and provoking themes.    When Movie Park Germany opened in 1996, it was owned by Warner Bros, who own the rights to the movie and built an attraction based on the film series. Comprising a rapids ride and pre-show, the attraction passed through numerous scenes depicting the settings and characters from the movies including the iconic luck dragon Falcon!   At somepoint around 2004, the park was sold and rebranded, resulting in many rides being re-themed. This was one of them, resulting in a similar (yet watered down) theme with the pre-show removed completely. Whilst traces of the original may have remained, the attraction was fully are-themed in 2018, resulting in any final traces heading towards the nothing.    Whilst the  new theme has been done rather well, there is a part of me that is disappointed it never got to ride with the original theme. But like all rides on this list, it shall remain a wonder I never had the experience to try.   Thank you for reading. What defunct  attractions does everyone wish they’d got to experienced? Feel free to comment below.   

In a (usually) ever moving world, parks change and update. Whether that be building attractions themed to blockbuster movies, the latest children’s book or original ideas. whilst new attractions rise, old ones will naturally and unfortunately fall. Due to age, redevelopment or reasons unknown. On the ever-growing list, here’s 10 attractions I wished to have experienced.
  1/ Pirate Adventure- Drayton Manor Theme Park Operated 1990-2015 I have quite a soft spot for dark rides, especially those with a Pirate theme. Pirate Adventure was one of several dark rides to open, taking a spin on the “POTC“Format. For example one scene apparently features a goat instead of a dog. It was one of the biggest park attractions at the time.   It closed around 2015 time on the grounds it was getting repairs, however  never reopened. This was eventually confirmed by park management. In 2020 much of the ride’s props and scenery were sold at an auction, putting a final nail to the coffin.
   I was naturally disappointed I never got to experience this, especially considering I first visited in 2016. It was likely amongst one of the most distinctive and characteristic UK  dark rides in it’s time.    2/ Transdemonium- Parc Asterix  2003-2018 It probably wasn’t the best or most technologically Advanced dark ride, but looked among of the most quirky and original ones out there. Opening in 2003 at a cost of 6 million Euros, it was the park’s only dark ride at the time. The ride system was manufactured by UK based  WGH Transportation with scenery completed by Farmer Studios, who worked on attractions such as Terror Tomb at Chessington.    It’s underground queue and mix of medieval and circus theming, helped it’s unique appeal. Including some random yet hilarious effects such as a random train horn and the exit going out through a demon-like creature. It is believed to not be  the best kept Of attractions, with temporary Halloween theming kept up amongst a determination of speed over time.   In 2019 Transdemonium didn’t open and quietly disappeared off the map. It was believed the attraction was closed for renovations and would reopen for Halloween or in 2020. However park management eventually confirmed it’s permanent closure and started gutting the former attraction. The former space  was used for the park’s winter event to house numerous temporary  attractions.   Missing this Dark ride (so narrowly too) seems one that has hit the most and summarises many things that were happening around that time.    3/ Duelling Dragons/Dragon Challenge- Universal Islands Of Adventure  1999-2017 Once an Orlando icon, but quickly falling from grace. I think the original theme and setting looked great, from it’s compelling backstory to amazing queue-line. Sure, they didn’t have the best layouts but their (once) unique duelling element made for something of a special ride.    It’s clear the ride lost it’s elements over the years. The Potter re-theme  resulted In most of the original theming being removed and never properly fitted in. What’s more, an incident meant it could never duel again. With  lessened appeal and another  Potter addition  planned , it was clear the ride’s days were numbered.    In late 2017 Universal would slay the dragons. Both coasters were scraped, making them the first B&M coasters in history to do so  (if you don’t count Hulk’s re-track). I may be a bit of a Cred hunter, but missing on these unique inverts is definitely a disappointment especially considering my hopeful dreams to visit Orlando  oneday!    4/ Knightmare- Camelot Theme Park  2007-2012 (relocated) I never visited Camelot Theme Park, but heard it was an interesting mixed bag of a park. One of the top draws to the place (for it’s latters years at least) was the installation of Knightmare, a relocated Schwarzkopf from Japan. Sure it lacked much of the impressive facade from it’s former home but was still an impressive attraction for the park it was in.    In 2012 the park closed down and a number of attractions were relocated. Knightmare unfortunately wasn’t and despite rumours of buyers, stayed put where nothing happened. At the start of 2020, the rusting coaster was demolished putting to  rest any hope of relocation. It’s such a shame that such a unique coaster ended up like this, let alone one in the U.K. Schwarzkopf coasters are a dying breed.    5/ The Great Movie Ride- Disney’s Hollywood Studios 1989-2017 One of Disney’s many ambitious projects of the eighties was to open a ‘’Movie themed’’ Park. This would not only fulfil original ideas of a Movie pavilion for Epcot but prepare Disney for it’s increase of competition with  Universal opening a year later.    Situated within a replicant building Of the Los Angeles TCL Chinese Theatre, the ride’s content was just as grand as it’s exterior. Featuring a mixture of live acting, set pieces and animatronics. Mary Poppins and The Wizard Of Oz were amongst the films included.    The ride was cut (no pun intended) from the lineup due to the park’s shift and redevelopment, where things shifted away from movie making and more towards entering the world of movies. A Mickey Mouse is  a great fit, however it is still such a shame  a former grand attraction has been removed, especially being a vocal part to the park when originally opening.   6/ Big Bad Wolf- Busch Gardens Williamsburg  1984-2009 It’s such a shame these coasters are  a dying breed now, especially given how fun they can be. The  Big Bad Wolf was definitely amongst the better models, from it’s beautiful scenery, interaction  remarkable drops. Those POVS make the ride out to be Vampire on steroids.    Hearing  such an iconic ride being torn down was naturally saddening, especially at a time when Vampire was the only suspended coaster I’d experienced. Verbolten looks an adequate successor, but it’s greatest weakness being it isn’t the Big Bad Wolf.    7/ Volcano The Blast Coaster- Kings Dominion 1998-2019 I remember seeing this coaster on countless documentaries and was instantly fascinated by this coaster due to it’s uniqueness. It’s volcanic theming and the fact it was the first LIM launched inverted coaster. It seemed quite a signature attraction for the park.   The ride appeared to have numerous reliability issues and  closed around 2018 to never reopen. In 2019 it was demolished, whilst I’ve been able to ride some of featured documentary rides, this wasn’t one of them!   8/ Eagles Fortress- Everland  1992-2009 Another suspended coaster for the list. If you thought I was obsessed with these attractions, you’d be right!    Less is known about this one than others, but it was believed to be highly unique within a stunning location. The ride’s downward hill position certainly enhanced it’s experience. The attraction became SBNO in 2009. Whilst the reasons are unknown, it is likely as a result of age and maintenance. The ride was demolished six years later. A shame for such a unique looking coaster!   9/ Back To The Future Ride- Universal Studios  Orlando  1990-2007 The Back To The Future Ride was probably amongst the most popular and iconic attractions at Universal parks back in the day. I remember hearing about this ride  in primary school, years before I became a proper park enthusiast.    Whilst it would probably look dated now, it’s such a shame this unique attraction was shuttered especially being such a big fan of all the movies. As much of a fan I am of The Simpson’s (which replaced it), it’s replacement looks somewhat inferior and appealing to what was there before. Least the train theming still exists.    10/ The Never Ending Story Rapids- Movie Park Germany (formerly Warner Bros Movie World) 1995-2004 Or Earlier Never Ending Story was one of the biggest fantasy films of the eighties. Although I only watched it for the first time 3/4 years ago, I instantly became obsessed with the movie from it’s unique and provoking themes.    When Movie Park Germany opened in 1996, it was owned by Warner Bros, who own the rights to the movie and built an attraction based on the film series. Comprising a rapids ride and pre-show, the attraction passed through numerous scenes depicting the settings and characters from the movies including the iconic luck dragon Falcon!   At somepoint around 2004, the park was sold and rebranded, resulting in many rides being re-themed. This was one of them, resulting in a similar (yet watered down) theme with the pre-show removed completely. Whilst traces of the original may have remained, the attraction was fully are-themed in 2018, resulting in any final traces heading towards the nothing.    Whilst the  new theme has been done rather well, there is a part of me that is disappointed it never got to ride with the original theme. But like all rides on this list, it shall remain a wonder I never had the experience to try.   Thank you for reading. What defunct  attractions does everyone wish they’d got to experienced? Feel free to comment below.   

Unless you’ve been living under on a distant island  or on a galaxy far away,  you will be fully aware of the current  pandemic that is happening, causing for much concern and cancellation of next to everything fun, social or entertainment related.
  Whilst there are definitely bigger concerns out there, we probably won’t get our park fixes again now for at least a little while. This is why I’ve pitched up the idea of 10 Theme Park related things you can do and enjoy in the comfort of your own home whilst waiting for all this to blow over. Feel free to post your own suggestions too.   1/ Theme Park Video/Computer Games
The first (and possibly most obvious) thing to do when the parks aren’t open. There are plenty of theme park games, from the obvious Roller Coaster Tycoon Games and  Planet Coaster, to the slightly more obscure Theme Park World and Roller Coaster Factory, and even the whacky (yet wonderful) Legoland  games. Whilst we wait for this to blow over, enjoy your own fictional parks, simulations and creations!   2/ Watching YouTube Videos 
Again, another straight forward option. YouTube is literally a library for theme park videos, let alone everything else. You can watch literally anything, from Theme Park Worldwide, Jack Silkstone, Pleasure Beach Experience and many many others. Not a fan of these  or vloggers altogether? Then why not watch a POV of your favourite/bucket list coaster or that charming dark ride from Efteling? I know it’s not the same as visiting in person, but in the right ambience it can do the trick!   3/ Listening to your favourite park soundtrack or Album  Theme Parks don’t just give us great attractions and experiences, but they also give us some great music and playlists. Whether Imascore  you adore or snore, there are  lots of soundtracks to listen to and cherish in the comfort of your living room or bedroom. Belt out that Europa Suite or Villa Volta music from your sound system. Or if you prefer listen to the popular music playlists that usually echo  through those  amusement park entrances. In your living room. Not Coronation street please!   4/ Theme Park (related) construction toys 
Theme Park toys and gadgets are becoming more common these days. You have Lego Rollercoasters, nano- park building kits and other crazy contraptions that are based off, or at least resemble theme park related items. Definitely worth a shot.   5/ Watching Film/TV shows with theme parks in 
You could say I am just repeating point 2 again, but I say no. The difference between those are that those films and tv series use the parks essentially as film sets fo centre around or the development of the plot line. Whether that be that underwhelming time the Lampoons visited Six Flags Magic Mountain, that time the Spykids saves the day in Knotts Berry Farm or that time Will embarrassed everyone in the Inbetweeners? It’s all there Indeed and lots to see and adds even more amusement (no pun intended) to compare the accuracies and inaccuracies to how these parks actually operated in real.    Silly me, how did I not even mention Final Destination? Ok there you go.     6/ Reminiscing Old Park Trips  This one won’t be for everyone, especially if it triggers  serious park withdrawal symptoms, but nonetheless may still be something worth doing. Whether you’ve been worldwide, around Europe or generally stuck to just the U.K. parks, there must be that trip, that place or that visit that literally stuck out for you and gave you ever lasting memories.  For me, it has to be that first trip to Disneyland Paris back in 2015. I had never been so excited upon visiting a park before and felt simply overjoyed with everything about that trip, from an entertaining park group to some simply hilarious and magical laugh out loud memories both within and outside the parks. Wow! Five years.   7/ Looking at your merch collection 
Again this won’t be for everyone, but for most, there is surely some item that you have, or at least were  collecting at one point. Maps, pin badges, mugs, clothes or even shot glasses. I know this seems like a long shot, but it is these items that help with those connections to the parks and remind of us those wonderful visits we had there and hopefully will again one day too. I’m generally a resin person.   8/ Books from parks and attractions 
The title alone is rather vague I admit, but there are lots of park books and even articles to read right now. From park guides, brochures, theme park biographies and picture books too. Many have informative content which really go down into the depths of how parks and attractions cane to be. John Wardley’s biography is a strong personal recommendation!   9/ Act It Out!   Ok, I’m probably scraping the barrel a bit here and I can see most of you already acting confused as you read this. But if you can’t get down to those memorable attractions, bring those memorable attractions to you. Act it out! Dress up or style as your favourite park characters. Why not re-enact the Hex pre-show or Symbolica’s storyline? Ok, I just got the idea from this video, but it’s still pretty fun eye?    10/ Interacting with park mates and communities  Last but not least, but the most important thing of all, stay connected with your theme park mates and communities. It may all seem awkward being separated from next fo everyone right now, but you can stay together through virtual context. Drop messages, video chats and other means. Talk about your favourite rides, debate whether Helix is better than Taron (no fighting please), but more importantly, stay happy and well entertained in this challenging time for everything theme park and non theme park related.   Thank you for reading if you survived to the end. We are all in this together!   

Unless you’ve been living under on a distant island  or on a galaxy far away,  you will be fully aware of the current  pandemic that is happening, causing for much concern and cancellation of next to everything fun, social or entertainment related.
  Whilst there are definitely bigger concerns out there, we probably won’t get our park fixes again now for at least a little while. This is why I’ve pitched up the idea of 10 Theme Park related things you can do and enjoy in the comfort of your own home whilst waiting for all this to blow over. Feel free to post your own suggestions too.   1/ Theme Park Video/Computer Games
The first (and possibly most obvious) thing to do when the parks aren’t open. There are plenty of theme park games, from the obvious Roller Coaster Tycoon Games and  Planet Coaster, to the slightly more obscure Theme Park World and Roller Coaster Factory, and even the whacky (yet wonderful) Legoland  games. Whilst we wait for this to blow over, enjoy your own fictional parks, simulations and creations!   2/ Watching YouTube Videos 
Again, another straight forward option. YouTube is literally a library for theme park videos, let alone everything else. You can watch literally anything, from Theme Park Worldwide, Jack Silkstone, Pleasure Beach Experience and many many others. Not a fan of these  or vloggers altogether? Then why not watch a POV of your favourite/bucket list coaster or that charming dark ride from Efteling? I know it’s not the same as visiting in person, but in the right ambience it can do the trick!   3/ Listening to your favourite park soundtrack or Album  Theme Parks don’t just give us great attractions and experiences, but they also give us some great music and playlists. Whether Imascore  you adore or snore, there are  lots of soundtracks to listen to and cherish in the comfort of your living room or bedroom. Belt out that Europa Suite or Villa Volta music from your sound system. Or if you prefer listen to the popular music playlists that usually echo  through those  amusement park entrances. In your living room. Not Coronation street please!   4/ Theme Park (related) construction toys 
Theme Park toys and gadgets are becoming more common these days. You have Lego Rollercoasters, nano- park building kits and other crazy contraptions that are based off, or at least resemble theme park related items. Definitely worth a shot.   5/ Watching Film/TV shows with theme parks in 
You could say I am just repeating point 2 again, but I say no. The difference between those are that those films and tv series use the parks essentially as film sets fo centre around or the development of the plot line. Whether that be that underwhelming time the Lampoons visited Six Flags Magic Mountain, that time the Spykids saves the day in Knotts Berry Farm or that time Will embarrassed everyone in the Inbetweeners? It’s all there Indeed and lots to see and adds even more amusement (no pun intended) to compare the accuracies and inaccuracies to how these parks actually operated in real.    Silly me, how did I not even mention Final Destination? Ok there you go.     6/ Reminiscing Old Park Trips  This one won’t be for everyone, especially if it triggers  serious park withdrawal symptoms, but nonetheless may still be something worth doing. Whether you’ve been worldwide, around Europe or generally stuck to just the U.K. parks, there must be that trip, that place or that visit that literally stuck out for you and gave you ever lasting memories.  For me, it has to be that first trip to Disneyland Paris back in 2015. I had never been so excited upon visiting a park before and felt simply overjoyed with everything about that trip, from an entertaining park group to some simply hilarious and magical laugh out loud memories both within and outside the parks. Wow! Five years.   7/ Looking at your merch collection 
Again this won’t be for everyone, but for most, there is surely some item that you have, or at least were  collecting at one point. Maps, pin badges, mugs, clothes or even shot glasses. I know this seems like a long shot, but it is these items that help with those connections to the parks and remind of us those wonderful visits we had there and hopefully will again one day too. I’m generally a resin person.   8/ Books from parks and attractions 
The title alone is rather vague I admit, but there are lots of park books and even articles to read right now. From park guides, brochures, theme park biographies and picture books too. Many have informative content which really go down into the depths of how parks and attractions cane to be. John Wardley’s biography is a strong personal recommendation!   9/ Act It Out!   Ok, I’m probably scraping the barrel a bit here and I can see most of you already acting confused as you read this. But if you can’t get down to those memorable attractions, bring those memorable attractions to you. Act it out! Dress up or style as your favourite park characters. Why not re-enact the Hex pre-show or Symbolica’s storyline? Ok, I just got the idea from this video, but it’s still pretty fun eye?    10/ Interacting with park mates and communities  Last but not least, but the most important thing of all, stay connected with your theme park mates and communities. It may all seem awkward being separated from next fo everyone right now, but you can stay together through virtual context. Drop messages, video chats and other means. Talk about your favourite rides, debate whether Helix is better than Taron (no fighting please), but more importantly, stay happy and well entertained in this challenging time for everything theme park and non theme park related.   Thank you for reading if you survived to the end. We are all in this together!   

Unless you’ve been living under on a distant island  or on a galaxy far away,  you will be fully aware of the current  pandemic that is happening, causing for much concern and cancellation of next to everything fun, social or entertainment related.
  Whilst there are definitely bigger concerns out there, we probably won’t get our park fixes again now for at least a little while. This is why I’ve pitched up the idea of 10 Theme Park related things you can do and enjoy in the comfort of your own home whilst waiting for all this to blow over. Feel free to post your own suggestions too.   1/ Theme Park Video/Computer Games
The first (and possibly most obvious) thing to do when the parks aren’t open. There are plenty of theme park games, from the obvious Roller Coaster Tycoon Games and  Planet Coaster, to the slightly more obscure Theme Park World and Roller Coaster Factory, and even the whacky (yet wonderful) Legoland  games. Whilst we wait for this to blow over, enjoy your own fictional parks, simulations and creations!   2/ Watching YouTube Videos 
Again, another straight forward option. YouTube is literally a library for theme park videos, let alone everything else. You can watch literally anything, from Theme Park Worldwide, Jack Silkstone, Pleasure Beach Experience and many many others. Not a fan of these  or vloggers altogether? Then why not watch a POV of your favourite/bucket list coaster or that charming dark ride from Efteling? I know it’s not the same as visiting in person, but in the right ambience it can do the trick!   3/ Listening to your favourite park soundtrack or Album  Theme Parks don’t just give us great attractions and experiences, but they also give us some great music and playlists. Whether Imascore  you adore or snore, there are  lots of soundtracks to listen to and cherish in the comfort of your living room or bedroom. Belt out that Europa Suite or Villa Volta music from your sound system. Or if you prefer listen to the popular music playlists that usually echo  through those  amusement park entrances. In your living room. Not Coronation street please!   4/ Theme Park (related) construction toys 
Theme Park toys and gadgets are becoming more common these days. You have Lego Rollercoasters, nano- park building kits and other crazy contraptions that are based off, or at least resemble theme park related items. Definitely worth a shot.   5/ Watching Film/TV shows with theme parks in 
You could say I am just repeating point 2 again, but I say no. The difference between those are that those films and tv series use the parks essentially as film sets fo centre around or the development of the plot line. Whether that be that underwhelming time the Lampoons visited Six Flags Magic Mountain, that time the Spykids saves the day in Knotts Berry Farm or that time Will embarrassed everyone in the Inbetweeners? It’s all there Indeed and lots to see and adds even more amusement (no pun intended) to compare the accuracies and inaccuracies to how these parks actually operated in real.    Silly me, how did I not even mention Final Destination? Ok there you go.     6/ Reminiscing Old Park Trips  This one won’t be for everyone, especially if it triggers  serious park withdrawal symptoms, but nonetheless may still be something worth doing. Whether you’ve been worldwide, around Europe or generally stuck to just the U.K. parks, there must be that trip, that place or that visit that literally stuck out for you and gave you ever lasting memories.  For me, it has to be that first trip to Disneyland Paris back in 2015. I had never been so excited upon visiting a park before and felt simply overjoyed with everything about that trip, from an entertaining park group to some simply hilarious and magical laugh out loud memories both within and outside the parks. Wow! Five years.   7/ Looking at your merch collection 
Again this won’t be for everyone, but for most, there is surely some item that you have, or at least were  collecting at one point. Maps, pin badges, mugs, clothes or even shot glasses. I know this seems like a long shot, but it is these items that help with those connections to the parks and remind of us those wonderful visits we had there and hopefully will again one day too. I’m generally a resin person.   8/ Books from parks and attractions 
The title alone is rather vague I admit, but there are lots of park books and even articles to read right now. From park guides, brochures, theme park biographies and picture books too. Many have informative content which really go down into the depths of how parks and attractions cane to be. John Wardley’s biography is a strong personal recommendation!   9/ Act It Out!   Ok, I’m probably scraping the barrel a bit here and I can see most of you already acting confused as you read this. But if you can’t get down to those memorable attractions, bring those memorable attractions to you. Act it out! Dress up or style as your favourite park characters. Why not re-enact the Hex pre-show or Symbolica’s storyline? Ok, I just got the idea from this video, but it’s still pretty fun eye?    10/ Interacting with park mates and communities  Last but not least, but the most important thing of all, stay connected with your theme park mates and communities. It may all seem awkward being separated from next fo everyone right now, but you can stay together through virtual context. Drop messages, video chats and other means. Talk about your favourite rides, debate whether Helix is better than Taron (no fighting please), but more importantly, stay happy and well entertained in this challenging time for everything theme park and non theme park related.   Thank you for reading if you survived to the end. We are all in this together!   

Halloween! It’s usually my favourite time of year. Parks are open longer, the darkening evenings lead to more night rides and the parks play host to scare mazes, spooky shows and creepy theming. Maybe all three.
  Now 2019 is far from my best and favourite year of Halloween. I haven’t visited as many attractions this year, due to numerous commitments and setbacks unexpectedly happening to me lately. However I’ve tried to enjoy and make the best of what I have been able to do.     Fright Nights
Last year’s event was something of a travesty. Lots of attractions, but absolutely nothing to note about quality. Blair Witch was probably the least terrible maze there. This year the event was a noticeable improvement. Creek Freek is easily the best maze of the event. It’s pacing, set design and length seem to fit it perfectly, easily making it the best maze the event has seen for years, which probably isn’t easy to be fair. Platform 15 was surprisingly good and I love the new ending they have for it. Terror At Amity High makes a great change from just scare-mazes and I hope this continues.  The event was mostly enjoyable but there is still way to go, before we start getting onto the lines of previous years. Atmosphere seemed to be lacking and a need for better parkwide lighting and audio are definitely required. Whatsmore seeing Saw Alive delapidated didn’t help either as that’s yet another abandoned attraction. Living Nightmare is already getting stale besides it’s reasonable set design.   Liseberg Halloween/
I had always wanted to go to Liseberg’s Halloween event, and this year seemed to be the best year to go. The park don’t hold off when it comes to decorations, with pumpkins and other bits of spooky theming scattered throughout. The cheesy entrance tunes are also thrown out for some catchy spooky tunes!  There were five mazes and two scare zones. I got to six of those. The scare zones were quite impressive, by utilising not only scare actors, but set pieces they can interact with as you pass by. Some of the reactions from others were simply priceless. The mazes were scattered around reasonably, with Vinden near the marquee, Skogen just off the entrance, Zombie next to Balder and The Experiment between Helix and the big wheel. Vinden was my favourite, as you went up an elevator into a building (presumably unused staff areas) and get bombarded with numerous scenes including a power area and other industrial areas. The Zombie maze was surprisingly good and really built up tension as you went around the maze. The use of Bill Wither’s Lovely Day really sets the scene well. The Experiment was probably the weakest maze, but still really well done and good use of the Atmosphere queue line. The ride was closed with the rapids.   The park’s permanent scare attraction Hotel Gasten featured some more spooky touch ups and still proves to be an excellent scare attraction amongst it’s immaculate set design. The park sure does look spooky at night with it’s lighting and features Halloween attractions for a calibre of ages.  It was great to get back on the park’s attractions after so long too. Balder is just relentless and I forgot how phenomenal the airtime is on it. Valkyria is a great addition to the park and is themed to such a great level in this park. It is probably my favourite dive coaster overall. Helix is still great, but I think I’m more Team Taron now. Lisebergbanen is still as fun as ever, even with the new trains. Loke is still my favourite flat ride. The rest are hit and miss.  The original Fairy Tale dark ride was removed to makeway for Valkyria. The fairy tale is over and the real world replaces it. If there’s anything scarier than any of these mazes, then it’s riding a scooter, falling off and crashing into a fence leaving you with a braised ankle!   Tulleys Farm Shocktoberfest  Pretty much the finale and final major halloween  event for me. I didn’t visit last year, but am happy to confirm it has retained (if not increased) it’s high standards from last year.  The new Wastelands Maze is simply excellent and by far my favourite maze of the whole event. I love the whole pacing and interaction of the whole maze which works so well. As does it’s occasional outside show. The Wreckening (formerly The Colony) was also very good, although some parts were a little questionable.  I really enjoyed the other previous mazes such as Twisted Clowns, The Village Coven of 13 and The Cellar. Chop Shop was still an enjoyable contender too and the Hounted Hayride was as great as ever,varying from scary and action packed scenes, to more comical ones such as the crazy nuns at the end. The cowgirl really tried chatting me up on my go, which seemed ironically appropriate. We also saw the Circus Of Horrors show which was both fascinating and gruesome. Not for the faint hearted, although Doyle definitely enjoyed his seat choice! Well that’s it for Halloween 2019. Maybe next years will be more spooky, but we shall have to see, although this year there hasn’t been a single event I have not really disliked. Until next time.   Adios!

Halloween! It’s usually my favourite time of year. Parks are open longer, the darkening evenings lead to more night rides and the parks play host to scare mazes, spooky shows and creepy theming. Maybe all three.
  Now 2019 is far from my best and favourite year of Halloween. I haven’t visited as many attractions this year, due to numerous commitments and setbacks unexpectedly happening to me lately. However I’ve tried to enjoy and make the best of what I have been able to do.     Fright Nights
Last year’s event was something of a travesty. Lots of attractions, but absolutely nothing to note about quality. Blair Witch was probably the least terrible maze there. This year the event was a noticeable improvement. Creek Freek is easily the best maze of the event. It’s pacing, set design and length seem to fit it perfectly, easily making it the best maze the event has seen for years, which probably isn’t easy to be fair. Platform 15 was surprisingly good and I love the new ending they have for it. Terror At Amity High makes a great change from just scare-mazes and I hope this continues.  The event was mostly enjoyable but there is still way to go, before we start getting onto the lines of previous years. Atmosphere seemed to be lacking and a need for better parkwide lighting and audio are definitely required. Whatsmore seeing Saw Alive delapidated didn’t help either as that’s yet another abandoned attraction. Living Nightmare is already getting stale besides it’s reasonable set design.   Liseberg Halloween/
I had always wanted to go to Liseberg’s Halloween event, and this year seemed to be the best year to go. The park don’t hold off when it comes to decorations, with pumpkins and other bits of spooky theming scattered throughout. The cheesy entrance tunes are also thrown out for some catchy spooky tunes!  There were five mazes and two scare zones. I got to six of those. The scare zones were quite impressive, by utilising not only scare actors, but set pieces they can interact with as you pass by. Some of the reactions from others were simply priceless. The mazes were scattered around reasonably, with Vinden near the marquee, Skogen just off the entrance, Zombie next to Balder and The Experiment between Helix and the big wheel. Vinden was my favourite, as you went up an elevator into a building (presumably unused staff areas) and get bombarded with numerous scenes including a power area and other industrial areas. The Zombie maze was surprisingly good and really built up tension as you went around the maze. The use of Bill Wither’s Lovely Day really sets the scene well. The Experiment was probably the weakest maze, but still really well done and good use of the Atmosphere queue line. The ride was closed with the rapids.   The park’s permanent scare attraction Hotel Gasten featured some more spooky touch ups and still proves to be an excellent scare attraction amongst it’s immaculate set design. The park sure does look spooky at night with it’s lighting and features Halloween attractions for a calibre of ages.  It was great to get back on the park’s attractions after so long too. Balder is just relentless and I forgot how phenomenal the airtime is on it. Valkyria is a great addition to the park and is themed to such a great level in this park. It is probably my favourite dive coaster overall. Helix is still great, but I think I’m more Team Taron now. Lisebergbanen is still as fun as ever, even with the new trains. Loke is still my favourite flat ride. The rest are hit and miss.  The original Fairy Tale dark ride was removed to makeway for Valkyria. The fairy tale is over and the real world replaces it. If there’s anything scarier than any of these mazes, then it’s riding a scooter, falling off and crashing into a fence leaving you with a braised ankle!   Tulleys Farm Shocktoberfest  Pretty much the finale and final major halloween  event for me. I didn’t visit last year, but am happy to confirm it has retained (if not increased) it’s high standards from last year.  The new Wastelands Maze is simply excellent and by far my favourite maze of the whole event. I love the whole pacing and interaction of the whole maze which works so well. As does it’s occasional outside show. The Wreckening (formerly The Colony) was also very good, although some parts were a little questionable.  I really enjoyed the other previous mazes such as Twisted Clowns, The Village Coven of 13 and The Cellar. Chop Shop was still an enjoyable contender too and the Hounted Hayride was as great as ever,varying from scary and action packed scenes, to more comical ones such as the crazy nuns at the end. The cowgirl really tried chatting me up on my go, which seemed ironically appropriate. We also saw the Circus Of Horrors show which was both fascinating and gruesome. Not for the faint hearted, although Doyle definitely enjoyed his seat choice! Well that’s it for Halloween 2019. Maybe next years will be more spooky, but we shall have to see, although this year there hasn’t been a single event I have not really disliked. Until next time.   Adios!

Finland had never exactly been on my radar; it was more somewhere that I thought "it'd be nice to go there one day", as opposed to a "I'll go there in a few years". Then, Taiga happened, and all of a sudden, my interest popped up dramatically. And so Linnanmäki happened this weekend. I looked at trying to combine the trip with other Finnish parks (like Power Park and Särkänniemi), but given how widespread they are, Finland being the 8th most expensive European country, and time being limited, I had to settle for just the one park.
 
The park was open 1pm-midnight, with it also being the first day of their Halloween event Iik!Week (weirdly, Finnish parks seem to do Halloween events in September, and it was very much a coincidence we ended up going to that too). On a Saturday like this, the park would normally be open 1-10pm, so still very good opening hours. The park is completely free to enter (not even a turnstile in sight), and a wristband for unlimited rides and attractions costs a slightly eye-watering €42. There's options to by 'tickets' for individual rides, priced at the even more eye-watering price of €9, or a 'bundle' of 6 tickets for...€42. Weird system but okay.
 
Taiga
I've covered most of my thoughts on Taiga here, but just to sum it up for completeness here too: Taiga is absolutely brilliant. It starts off the day well, and when it warms up, it's a relentless beast. Twists that throw you out of your seat, crazy airtime, ongoing speed. It's stunning. Just sheer brilliance, and POVs don't do the ride justice in any way.
 
The ride has okay operations, with staff asking every single person as they check bars if their pockets are empty and, if not, making them empty them. A small thing, but annoying.


 
Vuoristorata
Finnish for 'Roller Coaster', this is a wooden coaster that's been going since 1951, and is a traditional brakeman wooden, with the brakeman at the back of the train. Also is heavily inspired by Bakken's woodie apparently.
 
This is genuinely an utter joy. From the hilariously quick lift hill, to the fun drops and double downs and the pace it manages to keep, it's actually really fun. And at the front of the train, you get some VERY strong airtime. Between this and Taiga, it's a wonder I didn't end up with bruised thighs after this trip. We rode it 8 times during the day, which I think speaks volumes about the quality of this.

 
Kirnu
The first ever Intamin Zac Spin. Not a phrase that fills you with joy. I wasn't sure how I'd react to this, and ultimately I didn't enjoy it. The spinning is okay until the end, when it does it's only flip but drops you down head first. The rest of the ride is okay, but still not great. I hate to think what longer versions of this are like. In fairness, we did it twice, so it can't have been THAT awful, but it is significantly less pleasant when you board the station in the backwards facing seats. It's sad to think about how there are such contrasting Intamins in such close proximity.
 
Staff were very insistent on balancing the cars too, which took some time, and we even saw some staff members having to ride it to ensure this balance happened. Those poor souls. 


Ukko
Oh dear. This thing. My first Maurer Sky Loop, and this definitely is up there with one of the most awful experiences I've had on any ride. Whoever thought that a vertical lift hill going back on itself and hanging you upside down was a good idea must have been a bloody sadist. We were sat near the front, which meant we had dreadful hangtime, and it was genuinely one of the most uncomfortable experiences I've had, along with the bad restraints of a Maurer too. Then you do an inversion, seesaw and get off, questioning your life choices. 

 
Tulireki
The world's only standing Mack E-Motion coaster. What's an E-Motion coaster, I hear you ask? It's basically a coaster where the cars are meant to 'tilt' as you go round corners, thanks to some springs and stuff in the cars. You notice this as you board the cars, as they bounce around a bit. But after that, you hardly notice it at all. Except for the fact that this coaster is uncomfortable, bordering on rough. There's a drop where you literally shunt and jerk back and forth, and I slammed my back pretty hard. Another not pleasant one.
 
There's a couple of other coasters: Salama, a Maurer spinner that doesn't really spin, Pikajuna, a Mack powered coaster which, though not bad, has a long layout and goes round 3 times, making it boring, and Linnunrata eXtra, a custom Zierer built inside an old water tower. Linnunrata has optional VR goggles: I tried them on my first ride, selecting the horror versions (they had 3 choices). It was okay, nothing special, suffers from the same problems all other VR coaster have I guess, but since you don't have headphones, the atmosphere is hurt due to the lack of sound. Without the VR, there's some pretty cool space theming throughout the ride, and it's much nicer than the VR. Would recommend no VR.

 
Outside of the coasters, the park has some really decent rides: Kyöpelinvuoren Hotelli, a very well done ghost train with lots of special effects and surprises, Hurjakuru, a rapids ride featuring some scary waterfalls, an ever-flowing sprinkler tower with fire effects, and a generally decent layout and Kingi, a 75m tall gyro drop tower, which gives good views of the park and Helsinki. 


(their Enterprise and Ferris Wheel align beautifully at night!)
 
But what about Iik!Week?
It was impossible to know what to expect from the event; finding information and reviews online was difficult, and they seem to change everything each year. This year, the event included:
-2 Halloween exclusive mazes, rated 13+
-1 Halloween exclusive maze, for families/all
-2 overlays of existing attractions, rated 13+
-An outdoor attraction, which was basically a walkway, rated 13+
-A zombie disco outdoor area; with live DJ, bar and actors, rated 18+
-The area where most of the attractions are transformed into a scare zone, again rated 13+
 
All attractions started at 4pm, except the Zombie Disco which started at 6pm.
 
Despite the park being quite small, this did lead to a 'Thorpe effect' where only a section of the park felt like Halloween, and the rest of the park feeling pretty normal. Anyways, onto the attractions (with spoilers)..

 
Laboratorio (Laboratory)
Visitors to the park's harshest site are horribly awaited by the victims of failed human experiments who have been locked away at a research facility.
The first maze we did and the one which was marketed as the scariest; this would set the scene for the event. Before entering the maze, you're given a rope for everyone to hold to keep you together; this seemed to just be an alternative to hands-on-shoulders in keeping the group together.
 
A pre-show by a military person explains the backstory, and warns us to stick together, don't touch anything because of radiation, and to walk slowly. The maze itself was very well themed - a surprise from a city park where theming is sparse! Each scene is basically a room from the laboratory, where a failed human experiment is behind a window / cage. The actors themselves also looked great - amazing costumes and make up. But they weren't very scary. One experiment came out of their cage and chased us a bit, and another slammed a door. 
 
After barely a minute of slow walk, a sign pointing you to the exit appears, but then there's a monster for one final scare. The monster costume looked stunning, and must have been over 7ft tall. The actor did a really good job given they must have had limited movement, but they were also equipped with what looked like 3 large hairdryers stuck together as a 'weapon', which felt...odd.  
 
So yeah, a very short maze with little scares, but with great sets and great costumes and a good number of actors considering.

 
Zombie Tunnel
A zombie invasion created by a nuclear fallout haunts amateurs in an old nuclear silo tunnel. Horror lovers have only one way to protect themselves - the green radioactive light source causes the zombies to retreat. Step into the twilight corridor where horror-zombies scare away!
The other Halloween exclusive maze takes place in a temporary structure in one of the kids lands in the park (with 2-3 kids rides actually closed for the event). 
 
At the start of the maze, everyone is handed a green lightsaber (like a cheap pound shop one) to guide your way, with their in-story purpose being to scare away the zombies that await. These also serve a second, more obvious purpose though - to help you see. The maze itself only seemed to have one light throughout, and was otherwise very dark, so the lightsaber was essential to help you see.
 
The maze was again very short, effectively a horseshoe shape. There were quite a lot of actors (again, all with very good make up), but all bar one of them were stuck behind fencing, and all they could do was slam and growl. It was a very jarring experience, as there's no fear there whatsoever (even a girl who was in our group who looked around 13/14 wasn't the least bit scared). And given the theming for the maze was effectively fences and black tarpaulin, there wasn't much too it. 
 
Again, a short maze with little scares, but a fun concept and a good number of actors. 


 
Kauhusirkus (Horror Circus)
Do you dare to step into the Horror Circus of bloodthirsty clowns?
This is an 'overlay' of the park's other dark ride, Taikasirkus (Magic Circus). The ride was open before 4pm without actors, and we tried it - it was a suspended dark ride that goes through different scenes at a circus, with fun animatronics and such. The gondolas turn/spin slightly at different points throughout the ride too, to showcase different points within each scene. There was no audio, though apparently there usually is, which was odd..
 
After 4pm, the ride has actors (one in every scene, so about 6). The actors are allowed everyone - in the sets, in front of, behind and underneath the cars! The actors, were, unsurprisingly, clowns. This wasn't particularly scary (certainly a push to make this 13+..), but the actors occasionally hid and did (predictable) jump scares, making it a more fun/scary experience. Real highlight was an actor appearing in front of us, then as our gondola spun around, he decided to lay on the floor, as a fun way of surprising us.
 
Again, the actors looked really good, and this was well done.
 
Kammokuja (Abhorrence Alley)
The dead spirits have been wandering in the corridors of Kammokuja. There is also a large butcher living in the alley ...
An overlay of the park's 3D walkthrough (which was much like a spookier version of Hocus Pocus Hall at Chessington), which basically just included a couple of actors hidden around corners. It was fun, but the actors seemed very restricted in what they could do. For example, one actor literally just appeared from round a corner holding a tray of tea, said in a creepy voice 'Would you like some tea?', and then waited for us to move on with no further interaction.
 
The ending featured a large and loud male actor bashing on a wall brandishing a knife. Probably enough to get younger kids out quickly, but again, this felt a bit tame for a 13+ experience.
 
The outdoor walkway had some clown animatronics, the family friendly maze was just an outdoor labyrinth where the walls were spider webs (no actors) and the scare zone had a couple of sets of actors going round a couple of times.

 
Zombie Disco
The reason for this being 18+ was because of the bar; I imagine it makes it easier for serving drinks when you don't have to ID everyone when it's busy. As the park was very quiet, so too was the disco area, which meant it was lacking in atmosphere. However, the actors here did a great job; all interacting with every group personally, spending lots of time with any group there and staying in character very well. It was also nice to see zombies which don't grunt or growl at you, as many theme park mazes resort to.
 
A shout out to the zombie footballer, who at one point started a kick about with people in the area, then proceeded to do several keepy uppies (whilst remaining in perfect character!), and then carried on as if it was nothing. That was impressive!


 
So Iik!Week was a weird one. Clearly the park know their stuff when it comes to doing scary things: the costumes, set design (largely) and acting quality (mostly) were all very good in my opinion. Plus their ghost train is scary too. But it seems like they've held themselves back, like they don't want to create attractions which actually scare people, despite having everything there to do so. I really don't believe a park which has the creative levels they've shown wouldn't be able to get over the final hurdle of actually making something scary.
 
It's a shame, because they've got enough variation to do even one actually scary experience, and then keep the rest more fun. I hope that whatever their reasons, whatever their thought process, they decide to change their mind and do something actually scary in the future. In saying that, I still enjoyed the event, so can't really complain!
 
And that's that! Without Taiga, Linnanmäki would be one of those 'if you're in the area, visit' or 'if you've ran out of other parks to visit' types of parks. It's fun, but nothing standout enough. But with Taiga, they've got a truly exceptional ride, with enough of a supporting line up to be a really solid park which is well worth the visit!
 
How busy was it?
Surprisingly quiet! Thanks to some wet weather (which only lasted for a couple fo hours on and off), the park wasn't very busy, and we didn't queue longer than 15mins for anything. By about 8-9pm, everything was walk on.
How easy is it to get too?
The park is about a 30-40min bus ride from Helsinki airport
Is there anything else nearby?
Helsinki has a few bits; we did an indoor horror mini golf course, the Helsinki SkyWheel, Helsinki Flying Theatre and Helsinki SeaLife (which is joined onto the park)
How expensive is it?
Helsinki isn't cheap, and flying out there is a bit costly. We stayed in a hostel, booking a private room for 3 people which cost about €20pp, which helped reduce costs.

(and as ever, excuse the horrid photos..!)

We left Kennywood in high spirits and made the three-hour drive to Cedar Point, the most anticipated park of the trip and one that I’ve been waiting to visit for years.
 
Since I started enjoying coasters, Cedar Point has always stood out to me as the ultimate “bucket list” park and one that I never envisaged I’d actually get the chance to visit.  Yet here I was, in a car on the way to Cedar Point?  It just felt so surreal.
 
Driving into the park at night was an incredible experience as all the coasters were lit up despite the fact the park had closed hours ago, there were coloured chaser lights on the lift-hills and the skyline was just incredible.  I really have never seen anything like it and I was giddily excited despite having been on the road for 3 hours and being tired from the previous days.
 
We stayed at the Express hotel and whilst it was very nice with excellent rooms, we would book earlier and stay in Hotel Breakers if we visited again for the convenience.
 
(One thing to mention is we spent three days at Cedar Point with a visit to Kings Island after the first day, this review will cover the general park and I will write a separate review in due course for Coaster Mania).
 
Onto the park itself;
 
Cedar Point is unlike anything I’ve ever seen, it’s difficult to describe but I was in a state of amazement walking around taking in all the huge coasters around us.  Everything feels like it’s placed perfectly, the rides all look spotless and the park atmosphere is great with the parkwide music playlist and some rides having their own audio.  Of course, there isn’t a lot in the way of theming, but as it’s an amusement park we weren’t expecting this.  I was surprised by how well themed some areas were, actually!
 
The roller coasters are what Cedar Point are famous for, but to me they aren’t what makes it (IMO) the best amusement park in the world.  The thing that stood out to me, and that makes Cedar Point the best, is that despite having some of the world’s biggest coasters, they still take care of their older attractions.  There’s a steam train, numerous vintage flat rides and an old-style cableway, all in perfect condition.  In all the reviews of the park I’ve read nobody seems to talk about this, but I found it incredible that a park with so many huge rides and coasters still cares enough to look after their old-style rides like this.  UK parks would do very well to take a leaf out of their book with regards to this, in my opinion.  Much like Kennywood, they were happy to tell you how old the rides were with signage outside many of them.
 
Another thing I loved was the collection of Arrow Dynamics coasters.  With Arrow being my favourite manufacturer, it was fantastic to see five operational coasters and other rides throughout the park and again, they all looked in near-perfect condition.  For Magnum to run the way it does when it’s 30 years old is just amazing.
 
Operations were fantastic for the most part and you feel as though the staff all have genuine enthusiasm for the job they’re doing.  Even towards the end of long days they were still talking enthusiastically through the microphones, checking restraints as fast as they could and it was just incredible to see a park that puts so much effort into guest experience.  Magnum’s operations were particularly fantastic, it ran three trains on the Friday and they were dispatching one after the second had reached the bottom of the first drop.  No faffing in the station, no Speedy Pass slowing things down, it was fantastic and highlighted to me how an Arrow hyper-coaster should be run.
 
Onto the ride reviews;
 
Magnum XL 200
After years of holding The Big One in high regard I was incredibly excited to ride Magnum.  It holds a sentimental spot for me for being the ride that inspired Geoffrey Thompson to build a hyper-coaster at Blackpool, but I also think the importance of Magnum in the industry is often overlooked.  It was the world’s first hyper-coaster, kickstarted the “height-wars” across parks and inspired so many parks to build bigger rides.
 
Onto the ride experience itself, I absolutely loved it.  The first drop has an amazing “floaty” feeling in that it keeps getting gradually steeper, meaning you float further and further out of your seat as you descend.  It’s very effective and much better than it looks on pictures/videos.  After a forceful dip the crest of the second hill provides a moment’s pause before you dive into the tunnel, into the third hill which provides another incredible floaty sensation as you’re “not quite” in the seat throughout the entire hill.
 
The turnaround was very forceful (especially in the morning and night rides with no trims!) and felt very smooth for a 30-year-old Arrow coaster, following which you enter the airtime hills.  These hills are MENTAL.
 
The first few provide moderate airtime, as you would expect, but after you’ve turned to face the station you hit hill after hill with the airtime getting more intense and prolonged with each one.  By the last three we were literally standing up in our seats, which is then combined with a “special effects tunnel” for the last hill.  It’s unlike anything I’ve ever ridden before and the restraints allow for such unrestricted airtime, it beats any modern coaster IMO.
 
Magnum is my favourite roller coaster and I think it’ll be very difficult for anything to top it now for me.  It’s just perfect for what I enjoy in coasters, it has a lot of character, isn’t glass smooth (yet I never found it uncomfortable), has varied styles of airtime, force and Arrow-ness.  From the float-y hills at the start to the insane airtime at the end it never fizzles out and just feels like a perfect, well-rounded coaster.  A special ride.
 
Millennium Force
I thoroughly enjoyed Millennium force and think it’s a fantastic coaster as long as you don’t expect too much.
 
The cable lift-hill is cool and it certainly felt strange to ascend the first hill so fast, cresting the hill is also amazing as it feels as if you’re never going to level out with the change in angle (to a steeper drop) being so gradual.  There isn’t much time to prepare for the drop but instead you get a surreal feeling of it being a continuation of the speed you already have, before getting faster and faster as you continue to drop.
 
The ride is essentially 2 minutes of travelling at 90 miles per hour, and it’s one of the biggest rushes I’ve ever experienced.  There isn’t lots of airtime but it didn’t feel like it was missing anything, the ride is about height and speed and it achieves this perfectly.
 
The force on some of the turnarounds was fantastic and I found there to be an amazing floaty sensation over the hills if you sat towards the front of the train.  I did prefer the first drop in the back, however.
 
The last small hill (alongside the station) gives an unexpected pop of airtime before you enter the final turnaround and then hit the brake run.
 
I really liked the futuristic feel of the ride and it has such a huge presence in the park.  The station audio is great and it’s probably my third favourite ride at Cedar Point.
 
Steel Vengeance
This ride is insane.  I was unsure after my first ride but after a fair few rides after three days, it’s my second favourite coaster at CP.
 
It’s difficult to describe every element but the first drop and hills that follow provide some incredible prolonged airtime, following which you reach some inversions, some quick moments of intense airtime and then the second half which is just pure insanity.
 
Diving through the structure you get intense airtime, overbank, inversion, overbank with airtime, inversion, and then the last few airtime hills which are just crazy.  It’s such a brilliant sequence of elements and seems to just go on-and-on, truly a magnificent ride and I can see why it gets so much praise.
 
There was however unfortunately a downside to the ride, which was that I absolutely hated the restraints.  I tend to get achy legs anyway, so having my lower legs forced into an awkward position with clunky clamps and the lap-bar forced heavily onto me felt very uncomfortable; especially on a ride with so much intense airtime.  It’s a shame as I was very aware of the discomfort when going around the layout, it took away from the ride so much for me and ruined what might have otherwise been my favourite ride.  I can’t accept a brand-new coaster having such terrible restraints when a 30-year-old Arrow hyper-coaster has far superior and more comfortable trains.  A shame.
 
Operations were also very slow on this, who’s idea was it to have the phone and wallet holder on the trains?!
 
Maverick
WOW.  Incredible.
 
This ride puts any modern multi-launch coaster to shame, the fast pace of the turns, the force, the airtime and everything else is far superior.  Some of the highlights were the first few turns after the first drop, the two inversions which are taken very quickly and don’t feel drawn out or sickly, the second launch and the two Stengel dives.
 
It’s just such a ridiculous ride and the restraints make it very comfortable despite throwing you around like mad.  So, so good.  In any other park I’ve visited this would be the best ride without a doubt.
 
Top Thrill Dragster
A fantastic coaster and the best of the three of these style rides that I’ve been on (this, Kingda Ka and Stealth).
 
The launch feels so much more forceful than the others with it being an instant acceleration rather than phased, ascending the tower is unnerving with the lap-bar restraints as I found you felt as though you were falling backwards, then you just float down the twisted drop before landing in your seat.
 
I actually found the sensation of being slowed down by brakes on a straight piece of track was better than having an airtime hill, it really highlights the sheer power of the speed you’re travelling at when you gradually slow down rather than it being over an airtime hill (without any airtime because you’re being slowed down).
 
The ride ran 5 trains which was crazy, I really like the lap-bar restraints and the “ready to go” song was amusing.  If you’re going to make a coaster short, this is how to do it.  Brilliant ride.
 
Raptor
I enjoyed this but I much preferred Batman at Six Flags Great Adventure.
 
Raptor felt like it had some very good elements such as the corkscrews, the final helix was also incredible with so much force.
 
I found however that there were some awkward moments where not much happened throughout the layout, there was also a horrible jolt as you turned into the final brake run where the entire train seemed to shake.  Almost felt as though B&M had taken the last day off construction so Arrow or Vekoma had stepped in to finish the last turn.
 
Not a bad coaster, but one of my least favourites at CP.
 
Valravn
This was one of the rides I was least excited for because the pacing looked fairly slow off-ride, but I really enjoyed it.
 
The ride is more about prolonged force than anything else, however the views from the top are incredible with you getting to see the skyline from a unique viewpoint.  The drop is incredible, the force on the dips is great and the overall ride was much better than I expected.
 
My only criticism is that it didn’t feel right having a dive coaster without a tunnel!
 
Blue Streak
A fantastic classic wooden coaster with airtime, speed and it felt very well maintained.  The layout was great with some of the hills being much lower than others and therefore full of airtime, it had the right amount of bumpiness without feeling painful and the trains are good.

It’s one of the best rides at the park IMO and it’s great that they have kept it operating alongside their newer coasters.
 
The ride had a fantastic lighting package with the chaser lights across the beams, it’s almost as though the parks over here are actually proud of their classic woodies rather than stripping them of their charm and “modernising” them like we do back home?
 
Gatekeeper
Much better than I expected, very forceful and the keyhole element was great.  It wasn’t one of my favourites at the park but that’s more telling of how good everything else is rather than Gatekeeper not being a good ride.
 
I did find that the last helix felt a bit slow, though.
 
Rougarou
Quite good with some very different elements, it definitely felt bumpier that most B&M’s but I didn’t find it uncomfortable.
 
I think with this it’s a case of it being overshadowed by much better rides at Cedar Point, if you put it in a UK park it’d be one of the best rides.
 
Iron Dragon
Plus; it’s an arrow.  Minus; it’s not a very good Arrow.  Still keep it though because the mist is cool.
 
Gemini
Gemini is brilliant and an extremely underrated coaster, IMO.  I absolutely loved this ride.
 
The ride is incredibly smooth for an Arrow and the retro style of the trains/station is brilliant.  There is a lot of unexpected airtime depending on which row you sit in; the racing element is fun and it’s just an all-round great coaster.
 
The last helix made me chuckle, after a perfectly smooth ride they couldn’t resist adding in an Arrow-style square corner at the end!
 
Corkscrew
A fun ride, not my favourite Arrow coaster but it’s visually impressive with the corkscrews taking place over paths and looked really well lit up at night.
 
The paint job on the trains was fantastic and like everything else at Cedar Point, it looked perfectly maintained.
 
Wicked Twister
I had been intrigued by this type of ride for years and it was good fun, not a stand-out ride but there wasn’t anything negative to say about it either.  Just fun.
 
Wind seeker
Terrifying, a “get me off this now” type of ride.  Not even the views of Magnum made up for the sheer terror of this.
 
I enjoyed hearing the Harry Potter and ET film scores though.
 
Cedar Creek Mine Ride
This ride had hilariously square corners, awkward hills and it’s strange that the lap-bars run on the same mechanism per carriage (meaning it has to be in the same position across three rows).
 
But, it’s an Arrow, so that makes it great.  Keep it.
 
Skyhawk
Similar to Rush at Thorpe but much better.
 
Snake River Falls
Wet.  Fun though.
 
Thunder Canyon
Possibly the most ridiculous rapids I’ve been on, rivalled only by Kings Island’s.  You essentially either come off dry, or end up completely engulfed by one of the waterfalls meaning you come off looking like you’ve had 10 rides on Valhalla.
 
Then they had this weird exit path with water running down it (that looked intentional) meaning you had to walk through a puddle and get wet shoes (or step on the sides and avoid it)?  Why would anyone want that?  Weird.
 
Cedar Downs Racing Derby was good, it was nice to see that the racing feature of the horses still worked.  I prefer having an organ to the commentary, though.
 
The park had many classic rides such as the Antique Cars, Cableway and the Scrambler alongside many others.  We enjoyed these however there were others we didn’t have time to do, unfortunately.
 
Overall, it’s difficult into words how much I loved Cedar Point.  Driving into the park is breath-taking with the skyline coming into view, it’s an amazing enough experience in itself.  The big coasters are incredible and that combined with the park’s respect for their older rides is what makes the place, for me, the best park I’ve ever visited.  It feels as though there’s depth to the place and it’s definitely about more than just coasters.

When I say to people I'm going on a holiday with a week of rollercoasters, they ask what do I like about rides. At first I said it was the rollercoasters and all the different rides but as I've grown up it is completely all about the immersion and escapism. And nowhere is escapism more true in the Netherlands which has seen massive park expansions in the last ten years. Theme parks are fully upping their games and as I've wanted to revisit Efteling and take my first trip to Toverland, 2019 seemed like the right time to take a visit.. so...
 
Walibi Holland
 
We had a game plan here, to hit Lost Gravity first and all the other rollercoasters before trying out Untamed. This plan fell completely apart when both Untamed and Lost Gravity delayed opening. So instead we tried Goliath first
 
Goliath
.
For those that know me, I'm not a massive fan of the earlier Intamin rides. I don't have a high opinion of Expedition Ge Force and as much as I like Millennium Force it isn't a ride with much content. Goliath was a pretty pleasant surprise. It's got a lot going on but weirdly has a lukewarm reception in coaster circles. Lots of air time, two big helixes, a pretty amazing turn around after the large hill where the train turns to its side to corner. I was pretty impressed with the ride staff too who ran a very efficient ride. For those that have been on EGF, the loading takes a long time. Here, the staff were fast and the trains never stacked. This gained a 61 minute queue through the day but luckily we only queued 10 minutes for both of our rides.
7/10
 
El Condor

 
The true highlight of Walibi Holland is the stunning El Condor, the worlds first Vekoma SLC. Now we only queued 10 minutes luckily for this but later on in the day this had a 90 minute queue. It was as rough as expected and if you have done an SLC, you know exactly what to expect.
 
4/10
 
We took a walk round the park as the parks Rock and rollercoaster clone now had an hour queue as did the Vekoma boomerang. Lost Gravity and Untamed still weren't open so we took a ride on the kiddy coaster and the Vekoma Madhouse which was very cheesy with its early 2000's sound effects. The ride was good though, the same as Hex really just a bit less themed. I enjoyed this surprisingly.
 
It was after having a little look around that we saw that Lost Gravity was open. We queued 97 minutes for this..
 

 
This is a more extreme Mack then most with thrilling inversions, good air time and a very different layout. Think of a Gerstlauer eurofighter but with even more aggressive drops. Later on in the day we took advantage of the single rider queue (majority of Walibi Hollands rides have them) and got on in about ten minutes. The outer seats on this are slightly rougher then your average Mack ride but it is very good.


The main queuing cattlepen.
 
8/10
 
And wallah, straight after it was over to the now open Untamed.

This ride reminds me of the entirety of Margate with large love letters all around the queuing area and on the rides main lift hill. One issue with the queue is because it's mainly a dirt pathway, in the rain everyone just gets a bit muddy on their trousers. It also has no cover so we just end up soaked by the time we got to get on. In the sun I can imagine it might be a bit much.

The ride is absolutely fantastic. I genuinely find it incredible that this company just installs hit after hit. When people hype things up to a degree, I normally try to keep myself controlled and not read into the praise. It makes me glad that I can come to each ride with a completely open mind and just enjoy the ride for what it is. And Untamed was outstanding. Everything I value about rides sits in this attraction such as the great drops and air time, the insane pacing which particularly at the end of this ride is non-stop and breathtaking. For me it just lacks the length of Steel Vengeance but is worlds above Goliath at SFGA.
10/10 and easily a top five rollercoaster.
 

 
Rest of the day was just trying to lap up the other rides and get some credits such as the Vekoma Boomerang which was far above others of its type.
 
And so, Walibi Holland is an interesting park. I'm not sure if I'm particularly bothered about getting back as to be honest its not so much a theme park as it is an amusement park. It's clearly going from strength to strength and its future is fully secure with Untamed being one of the best rides in Europe.
 
Toverland
 
With no exaggeration, Toverland is one of my favourite parks in Europe. Considering the park only opened in 2001, it has gone from strength to strength to have one of the best rollercoaster line ups and themed areas I could possibly want. This is what a theme park is to me, beautiful areas and rides that look beautiful, ride well and a place where you can just relax, sit back and just immerse yourself.
 
Fenix
Fenix represents the last of the B&M's in Europe for me to ride. I initially completed this on Flug Der Demon last year but then this and Valkyria opened. 

 
Fenix is quite unlike all the other B&M wing riders I've done. The others are pretty... slow is a fair assessment. But this one absolutely zooms through its layout and is by far the fastest and most intense wing rider I've done. We managed front row on both sides and also near the back of both.
The main drawbacks is the initial start of the ride is just a bit empty box. They've attempted theming with an ice dragon head breathing smoke at you but this start is 'lacklustre'. Once you finally get going though, what follows is an intense start with great air time, massive helixes and an enjoyable ride.

7/10
I love a list so..
1. Gatekeeper
2. Flug Der Demon
3. Fenix
4. Raptor
5. The Swarm
6. X-Flight
 
Troy
 
Excellent GCI. When people criticise Wicker Man for being too short I sort of understand it, especially from people who have ridden Troy. It is an action packed thriller of a woodie that has a long length and great air time moments.
 
Dwivelwind

8/10
 
Wow. What a ride this is. We managed eight rides during our day and each one was better than the last. This thing spins like absolute crazy and is so re-rideable. Very much a big surprise and a highlight of the trip.
 
And the final main ride of the trip is the Booster Bike which is okay but pales into significance to the other rollercoasters.
 
To get an idea of how beautiful this place is though, here's a few photos fro Avalon which I adored and could have spent hours in. What an enchanting and magical place.

So yeah, Please go.
 
We also went to Efteling and Disneyland Paris which were both excellent days out. I love Efteling so much, its a real gem of a theme park and Baron 1898 just makes me squeal. Love it.
 
Many thanks.?
 

After a gruelling 5-hour drive from Six Flags Great Adventure the night before, the third day of our USA trip was spent at Kennywood.
 
The park has appealed to me since seeing Phantom’s Revenge on an “extreme rides” TV program and with the promise of historic rides and coasters, plus an old-style hyper coaster I was already very excited for this park.  But would it deliver?
 
I am pleased to say that Kennywood is one of the most amazing parks I have ever visited.  The place is full of historic rides such as a Turtle Chase, a working Noah’s Ark as well as three wooden coasters, plus lots of historic flat rides.  The atmosphere was incredible with everything painted in vibrant colours, and it was so lovely to see how proud the park is of their history.
 
As we were dispatched on the Whip (yes, a functioning whip!) a pre-recorded announcement proudly told us the ride was over 90 years old and had been in three locations during its time at Kennywood; every historic ride was the same with signage and announcements proudly telling us that it was the last of its type, this many years old etc.  Racer even had a reference to the National at Blackpool for being another Mobius loop.  As a long-standing fan of BPB who is not happy with the way the park has changed, the pride that Kennywood takes in their history resonated very well with me.  Despite building a huge new coaster they haven’t forgotten (or tried to hide) their heritage, in fact they’re very happy to acknowledge that it’s what makes the park special.
 
The way the park is landscaped is brilliant with it making the most of the hillside and rides intertwining making for such a unique charm that you just don’t find anywhere else.  The wooden coasters all had strip lights on them, I would have loved to stay at the park after dark but it unfortunately wasn’t possible.
 
The staff at Kennywood were all fantastic however I didn’t feel that operations (in terms of through-puts) were anything to write home about.  They weren’t terrible, but when you have Phantom’s Revenge and Thunderbolt running one train until the afternoon with fairly long queues, as well as Racer loading both trains with one member of staff (?!) it got a bit tedious.  Things did pick up in the afternoon, but dispatches on Phantom’s Revenge were still very slow when it was running two trains.  On balance however, Jack Rabbit ran very efficiently with two trains and a queue that we expected to take an hour only took us 15 minutes!
 
As a result of the operations plus limited time we sadly missed the Bayern Curve, my biggest regret of the trip is waiting 20 minutes for the awful Garfield ride but missing this!
 
I would like to emphasise that the operations in no way put me off returning, but had they been better (and if there hadn’t been a few ride closures) Kennywood would now be my number 2 park.  Everything else was so good it outweighed this and the place left us all on such a happy note, I would definitely return and look forward to hopefully getting on Steel Curtain one day.
 
Onto the ride reviews;
 
Phantom’s Revenge
This ride is INCREDIBLE.  After the classic lift-hill you go down a much smoother (and IMO less impressive) version of PMBO’s first drop, but the second drop is when this coaster really gets going.
 
You crest the hill at moderate speed, but are then launched out of the seat and don’t land until you reach the dip at the bottom.  Bearing in mind you’re going down the side of a hill and also encounter a near-miss with the wooden coaster whilst being out of your seat, it made for one of the best moments I’ve ever experienced on a coaster.
 
Following this, you go into a very forceful (and smooth) turnaround before hitting absolutely insane bunny hills.  The ride’s restraint system is very unrestricted which really works to its advantage here, as you’re launched up into the restraint without any hint of discomfort and the force of the turns work well to pin you back down before the next bout of airtime.
 
Phantom’s Revenge is just an incredible all-round coaster, it’s exactly how a smooth coaster should be; it throws you around and has variety in its elements, but never slows down or feels like it’s dragging on.  10/10.
 
Thunderbolt
A very good wooden coaster with a unique layout; you start with a drop down the side of the hill (again making very good use of the terrain) before starting the main lift-hill.
 
The ground-level turns combined with the fact that there are no seat dividers make for an interesting ride experience if you’re sat on the left, it’s worth bearing in mind that they do not allow single riders (meaning that we saw people waiting on the platform for an odd-numbered group before they could ride) due to this.  It’s just a proper classic wooden coaster and feels as though it’s been very well maintained.
 
Racer
Racer is a very good racing wooden coaster, but not a patch on the Grand National IMO.
 
It runs much smoother and the ride feels like it’s in much better condition, the trains and restraints are also much better.  The layout however doesn’t produce much airtime aside from one drop, but it’s still a very enjoyable heritage wooden coaster and I’m appreciative of the fact that Kennywood have kept it in near-perfect condition.
 
The ride’s station has a plaque proudly displaying that it was restored to its original 1927 appearance; it’s just amazing that they care about details like this.
 
Jack Rabbit
This ride made very good use of the terrain like Thunderbolt and contained an insane moment of airtime.  The ride doesn’t have lap-bars as such, but instead has a seat-belt and a static bar which partially covers the seats.  Operations on this were very quick and the staff were fantastic at interacting with guests etc.
 
Exterminator
Exterminator is a standard spinning mouse but with it being inside and having some decent effects, it’s by far the best of the ride type that I’ve been on.  A good example of taking a standard layout and turning it into something special.
 
Whip
Just incredible.  Having never got the chance to ride Pleasure Beach’s, it baffles me that they decided to rip it out and replace it with the world’s worst set of Dodgems?!  It’s a disgrace to be honest, what were they thinking?
 
Anyway, onto the ride itself, we were dispatched with the spiel telling us about the ride’s history and on we went, the force generated on the turns was substantial and it was just a huge amount of fun.  So, so good.
 
Kangaroo
Another classic flat ride and once again they were proud to tell us it was the only ride of its type left, it basically consisted of hydraulic arms going around with a “jump” part-way round the circle.  A very simple but effective ride, and again just bags of fun.
 
Rapids
I think we got soaked on these but can’t remember 100%.  I’m sure they were good though, because Kennywood.
 
Noah’s Ark
Incredible, amazing, a piece of history that’s been kept up-to-date whilst not losing its charm.  So many cool effects and UV scenes in there, it was lovely.  *Insert standard dig at PB boarding theirs up and using it as an entrance here*
 
Turtle
As above, a very fun piece of history and the only one left in the world.  Going around on this with Thunderbolt and Phantom’s Revenge flying past around us, you could just feel the history of the place and I had a “moment” of appreciation for just how amazing the park is.
 
Also, the announcement is brilliant, “Turtle!  Turtle!”
 
Garfield’s Nightmare is a disgrace.  From my understanding, it used to be a historic River Caves style ride but they’ve turned it into a terrible 3D Garfield thing with the weirdest scenes and nonsensical audio ever.  Horrendous.
 
Ghostwood Estate was a decent enough shooter-style dark ride, but had probably the most terrifying dinner table in the world.
 
Swing Shot (like Rush at Thorpe) was decent, unfortunately the Black Widow was closed as was Sky Rocket.  As mentioned above I’m gutted we didn’t do the Bayern Curve, but all the more reason to go back, I guess!
 
Overall Kennywood is absolutely incredible and I would 100% recommend visiting, particularly if you have an appreciation for historic rides.  Everything from the atmosphere and vibrancy to the sound of the rides, the pride they take in the park and the hillside location, it’s just such a special place.

Ever since I was young I always have dreamed of visiting Cedar Point.
Sure it doesn't have as many coasters as Magic Mountain but I feel like Cedar Point has undeniably the better lineup in terms of quality over quantity.
The park also a lot more history than Magic Mountain and is very popular with enthusiasts from around the planet.
Very recently I had the pleasure of visiting for 4 days from Chicago which is a trip I will never forget.
 
Anyway I'm gonna start off reviewing the coasters as that is really what Cedar Point is known for.
 
Blue Streak:
(View of Valravn while in line for Blue Streak)

 
After entering the park it rained heavily resulting to many rides being down.
One of the rides that was open and near the front was Blue Streak, the parks classic out and back woodie.
The ride pleasantly surprised me with its fairly smooth ride experience with some great airtime moments. 
The ride isn’t too long in length but it’s a fun ride that families and enthusiasts will enjoy.
 
I would certainly compare this to something like Big Dipper at BPB, classic but very fun.
It never really gets much of a queue too so its pretty easy to get a bunch of rides on this thing.
 
Rougarou:
(Taken on another day hence the sun)

 
After Blue Streak I was pretty set on doing Raptor/Valravn but getting on either of them was a futile effort.. After realising this I walked over to around Millenium Force to see Rougarou, completely walk on.
I literally walked right into the station and right onto the train which was midway through loading, it was crazy!
 
My overall thoughts of the ride is that it’s pretty good!
It’s nowhere near as painful as Dragons Khan and I really enjoy the more twisty approach the layout of the ride has instead of inversion after inversion.
The ride certainly has a rattle but by no means is it rough!
I wouldn’t say it’s extraordinary but I think this ride gets a bit of a bad rep. It’s not top 5 for Cedar Point by any means, but it’s fun.
 
The ride like Blue Streak seems to never get much of a queue even on the busiest days which means you get a ton of rides in!
 
 
Millennium Force:

Millennium Force is one of the most decisive rides in the world.
It has some hardcore fans, it has its naysayers, and it also has people somewhere in between.
 
After a 10-20 minute queue through the rain I finally got on this iconic coaster,
And.. This a complicated one to talk about.
 
So I like Millennium  Force- it’s fast, smooth as butter, has a great drop and some decent floater airtime.
The problem with Millennium is that it only really has three proper airtime moments so don’t expect Shambhala levels of air here..
It’s not too forceful either, it’s all about just gliding through the long course gracefully with a bit of airtime chucked in.
 
Millennium Force I think fits the “jack of all trades, master of none” phrase. It doesn’t really do anything the BEST in the park but its still a very good coaster.
Don't expect Maverick style intensity or Shambhala levels of floater air, everything after the drop is just fun and not exceptional.
I think in a way Millennium Force being on the tamer side is a good thing,
especially when Maverick and Steel Vengeance are in the exact same park.
 
On another note the restraints on this thing are pretty neat and leave you feeling pretty exposed,
they are a little nutty for us guys though.. Rip future children..
 
 
Gemini:

After walking up to Steel Vengeance and seeing it broken down I decided to ride one of the parks five arrow coasters.
 
Now Gemini is probably the most odd coaster at Cedar Point.
A modestly tall hybrid coaster that duels (but only duels every blue moon)? Yep!
Despite its weirdness I actually quite enjoyed this coaster. It’s not the best layout but the coaster has some airtime and overall it’s a really classic ride.
The ride certainly isn't the most intense thing ever made but it has more airtime than Millennium Force in most rows so its cool.
 
Fun fact: The Blue side actually was my 100th credit!
I also got stuck on my second ride on the red side! The train stopped on the MCBR which caused a 5 minute delay.
Luckily I got a free line skip from this so I got another ride on Maverick!
 
 
Steel Vengeance:
When I saw the announcement for this ride a couple of years ago I said this thing would kick ass.. And holy crap..

 
I had very high expectations for this coaster, like stupid high. I would be disappointed if this wasn’t my favourite coaster! 
So after a fairly decent wait I got into the funky looking trains and the rest was history..
 
Steel Vengeance is unbelievable,
There is airtime before the lift hill, airtime on every hill, airtime where you wouldn’t expect airtime to be. This coaster has so much airtime it probably has more of it than every UK coaster combined! It’s stupid. 
The ride just feels relentless, even the mid course doesn’t really do anything to stop the insanity which is this coaster..
 
Layout wise the first half is more focused on large scale elements while the second half of the ride stays very low to the ground and uses the ride structure to create some headchoppers.
 
On my first ride I was hysterically laughing throughout the entire thing, how could a coaster be so relentlessly fun? Every hill delivers so much airtime and every element keeps you interested.
This coaster's layout is pure perfection, it just ticks all the boxes for everything that you could ever want in a coaster.
 
Now a few people have complained about the restraints and honestly I can understand how it would hurt.
Being around 5’7 and fairly slim I found no issue with the restraints but I can imagine that it could be not ideal for those who are taller or larger.
Besides that I think Steel Vengeance is actually flawless. It’s got a kickass layout with the BEST airtime of any ride I have ever experienced by miles, great inversions, a long length, and headchoppers to boot.
 
Easily my favourite coaster I have ever ridden,
Steel Vengeance is a MUST ride for any enthusiast.
 
Magnum XL H20:
So my only other experience with a arrow hyper is The Big One..
 
*sad violin music*
 
Going into magnum I wasn’t expecting much considering how boring and painful Big One is, fortunately Magnum exceeded my expectations
Magnum is really everything Big One could of been!
 
Fun, full of ejector moments, and just overall a enjoyable experience!
The ride has one hill or so at the start that doesn’t deliver much but every other hill throws you out pretty brutally which is good for those who like a bit of ejector air.
Sure its not the smoothest ride on the planet but the ride gives so much airtime I didn't really care.
 
Unfortunately I didn't get any pictures of the ride due to its remote location.
Due to being fairly out of the way from the park the ride never really gets much of a queue either which is great if you wanna lap this thing!
 
Due to the torrential rain the ride was temporarily introduced as “Magnum XL H20” which was very fitting when the tunnels were dripping with water! This made for a cool unintentional water effect.
 
 
Maverick:

 
Maverick is the ride that managed to completely change my mind on a manufacturer, Intamin.
 
My previous experiences with Intamin had been rides such as Colossus (why?), Furius Baco (just no), Rita (just burn it).
My only good experience with this company is probably Red Force or Stealth and both of those rides aren’t really anything to write home about.
 
Maverick definitely has opened my eyes to the potential of Intamin, this coaster is nothing short of spectacular.
First off the queue and ride itself is probably the prettiest the park has to offer. The queue for this ride is also mostly in the shade which is good on a hot day/rainy day. 
Once on ride Maverick is a pretty intense coaster that has the best banked turns I’ve experienced and a few airtime moments that are absolutely fab, not forgetting a brilliant first drop and second launch.
The ride like SV is relentless, crazy element after crazy element. The airtime moments are full on ejector like SV too.
 
Unlike other Intamin coasters Maverick utilises the new soft vest restraints which make the ride experience much more comfortable. I really wish rides like Rita got these as it would make the ride much more tolerable.
 
The more I rode Maverick the more I questioned if this was my favourite coaster. In the end I decided I prefer Steel Vengeance but only barely.
After riding Maverick I can see why American enthusiasts love to suck the **** of Intamin so much.
Brilliant coaster.
 
Gatekeeper:

 
Now I’ll admit that I don’t like Swarm.
It’s kinda short and force less, don’t get the love for it.
Gatekeeper overall is really just a much bigger and better version of Swarm (take away the theming).
I like it more than Swarm, it’s definitely a good coaster, but not my thing.
 
Like the wing over drop is great and the coaster has that cool inversion over the park entrance which is cool.
But still when it comes to forces and the fairly tight B&M vests it’s just kinda okay in my books.
Overall I think B&M wings are just not my thing in general, they are too forceless for my taste, though Gatekeeper is currently my favourite one.
 
I'm also not a fan of the ending of this ride, like that helix? Why? Other than that section the layout is actually pretty decent, I especially like the dive loop.
Raptor:

 
Raptor is a pretty hard one for me to rank.
I enjoyed the overall forcefulness of it but I wasn’t a fan of cobra roll and some of the other transitions which made me think it hasn't perhaps aged all that well.
I feel like Nemesis overall has aged and rides a lot better than Raptor, Nemesis in comparison is pretty butter smooth.
Despite it being a little brutal the ride has some great moments like a really forceful zero g roll and an incredible helix which is my favourite moment on any invert, period.
 
If the cobra roll and transition the brakes were smoother I probably would rank this ride above Nemesis,
though sadly these transitions really held the ride back for me.
 
I would rank Raptor as a lot better than Batman and Inferno but I would say just a little behind Nemesis due to its roughness.
On another note the ride didn't get too much of a queue which made re-rides easy!
 
Valravn:

 
My only other dive coaster is Oblivion so this has to be better than that right?
Well, barely?
 
Valravn has all the right stats and a pretty great layout, though the ride itself is highly underwhelming.
 
I think the rides awful restraints play a role.
There is a time and a place for B&M vests, dive coasters are just not made to have these things.
The restraint neuters the main appeal of the ride (the drop)!
Even worse the station only loads one train at a time which makes the throughput seem like a lot less than Oblivion..
 
I think Sheikra and Griffon will ride way better than this, the restraints really hold this ride back and prevent you from really feeling any of the drops.
 
To clarify,
Not a bad ride.
Just could be so much better!
On another note, Valravn’s last inversion is incredibly fun!
 
Iron Dragon:

 
Another one of the many arrows this park has in its lineup, Iron Dragon is certainly more of a scenic ride than anything and that’s a good thing in a park like Cedar Point.
 
I found the ride to be pretty good for it’s age and the ride looks brilliant!
I would probably rank Vampire above it due to the new trains and more intense ride experience but Iron Dragon is certainly much more scenic.
 
Sure its very tame but I think this ride has its place in the park and it doesn't seem to take up too much space.
 
 
Top Thrill Dragster:

 
“What the fu** am I doing?”- My exact words when waiting for the launch in the front row on my first ride.
Top Thrill Dragster is my first strata coaster, and holy crap did it deliver.
 
Dragster is a massive one trick pony but when it does that trick so damn well, I can’t complain.
The launch is incredibly intense and smooth (unlike Red Force) and the ride has a decent throughput for its ride type.
The staff are very good with the dual loading which makes the queue a little more bearable.
 
The rides launch is incredibly forceful like Stealth’s but isn’t rough like Red Forces and the ride has a very comfortable lap bar which leaves you feeling pretty exposed!
Overall Top Thrill Dragster only has one trick up its sleeve but that trick is executed perfectly which makes it my third favourite in the park.
 
The only really downside to this ride is the downtime. Though with its hydraulic launch that is to be expected.
I also found the queue-line to be a little unbearable on the sunny days due to it being COMPLETELY exposed with no shade whatsoever.
 
Cedar Creek Mine Ride:
Cedar Creek kinda falls into a similar category as Iron Dragon; very pretty and lovely views but by no means anything worth shouting about.
Its a fun mine train that is better than El Diablo but by no means it is something I rode more than once (hence no pictures of it).
 
I think in the future this ride might be removed for a new coaster due to its fairly large footprint, the ride also doesn't seem too popular with the public anyways.
Overall a classic ride but I see it biting the dust somewhat soon due to its fair sized footprint and its fairly low popularity.
 
 
Wicked Twister:
If placed at most other parks this ride would be one of the signature attractions, though at Cedar Point this ride kinda gets overlooked.
 
Wicked Twister is the tallest inverted coaster in operation (not even joking) and is a incredibly fun impulse coaster.
It’s not MaverBae or SteelVengBae but it’s a great coaster with forceful and fun launches.
I do prefer V2 at Six Flags Great America (spoilers) but Wicked Twister was still a great coaster! I really enjoy the twisting spikes and sheer height of this thing, its just a fun time.
 
I was surprised how this thing never got a line tbh, I think it really speaks about just how the packed the Cedar Point lineup is.
 
 
Corkscrew:

 
I didn't ride Corkscrew until Day 3 and going in I was expecting to be in pain and bored.
This was surprisingly quite fun, not the best coaster but it was enjoyable.
 
I preferred this over Demon actually, the airtime hill after the drop caught me off guard, that element actually gives good airtime!
The ride overall I found to be pretty smooth for a arrow looper and overall quite fun.
 
This ride also looks really really pretty on the midway!
 

 
Operations:
Cedar Point overall had pretty great operations. 3 trains on all B&M's, well done dual loading stations on Maverick and TTD, 2-3 trains on Steel Veng, overall very solid.
Stacking did occur but operations were still pretty great considering the amount of trains they ran.
Its no Europa but probably the second best operations I have experienced, very good!
 
I really enjoyed the running commentary some of the staff gave while in the queue, it was something very different to the UK.
For example while in line for Magnum while waiting for the train to come back one of the staff had a microphone and was listing some of the stats and started quizzing the queue on the rides history. I found this really cool and it made the queue much more fun.
 
This also happened on rides like Blue Streak and Gemini and seemed to really mostly happen on the quieter days.
I have to say props to the staff running the rides for doing things like that as it made the short wait feel even less like a wait at all.
 
I think as a whole Cedar Point delivered really good operations but its certainly not as good as Europa. But that is a hard act to follow.
 

 
 
Conclusion:
Cedar Point is a park with good operations and one of the best if not the best coaster lineup on this planet.
Its not surprise why enthusiasts worship this place and I think every enthusiast should visit this park in their lifetime.
 
I think I still prefer Europa Park in terms of the full package (food, atmosphere, theming, ect) but Cedar Point is easily my second favourite.
 
I hope you enjoyed this review,
Six Flags Great America next.
 

 

 
 

 
(so much airtime I can barely open my eyes!)
 
 

 

 
 

Many enthusiasts boast about Efteling, Europa Park and Phantasialand. This isn’t my quote but it’s true. These parks boast quality attractions, theming and usually lead the way when it comes to innovation.. but what about Asterix?
  Parc Asterix is a fair sized “family park” located in Plailly France, just outside of Paris. This place boasts a well rounded diverse selection of attractions and is based off the Asterix comics.  Despite it’s continuation of investments, class rides and relatively) easy location, why is it this park seems comparatively forgotten about, especially in the UK? Perhaps having a bigger fish nearby (Disneyland Paris) doesn’t help but that can’t be the only reason.   It is here that I will explain why I consider this park to be underrated and why it should be somewhere everyone should try and visit amongst the other great parks around in Europe.    Getting There/ Parc Asterix is relatively easy to get to, as long as you know what you are doing. We flew with EasyJet to Paris Charles De Gaulle from Gatwick, although they fly from Luton and Stanstead as well (at the time of writing).    You will need to get to terminal 3, where the Parc shuttle goes from unless you are using a taxi or hire car. You may need to get a (free) shuttle train.    You buy the ticket before boarding at the ticket office. Return tickets are available. The bus goes approximately every 30 minutes with the journey taking around 20 minutes. A bit like going from Heathrow to Thorpe if they ran a bus service.  After the usual security checks etc. You are in the park and are greeted upon this beautiful street (name£). One of the striking features is Asterix at the top of the mountain which makes for a perfect entrance. Like the Towers in Towersreet or the La Chateau bois Dormant in Disneyland Paris. One of the main draws to the park is Oziris, a B&M invert coaster. Built in 2012 and located towards the north/east of the park, this coaster certainly pulls in punch, delivering a forceful and talentless circuit with some variations from your traditional invert,  I can easily say this is my favourite B&M which packs some incredible forces even in the middle rows. It’s also pretty to look at and looks comparatively better than some B&Ms the same age.  Tonnere De Zeus is an old-school modern woodie in the sense it pre-dates the likes of Wodan and Wickerman, but is still newer than your classics.  I won’t deny this isn’t my top woodie, but it still packs a punch and is still an amazing ride. They are gradually retracking, so when this is finished the ride will probably be slightly better too.  The park’s newest coaster currently is Pegasus, a Gerstlsuer coaster featuring launches,lifts and backwards sections featuring twists and turns through.  It interacts beautifully with the nearby Rapids and features a pretty station with some hilarious pieces of theming like a Greek vending machine. It’s a throughput monster too on four trains!    Somewhere like Drayton or Chessington would do well with something like this too.  In a forested area of the park lies Train De La Horra, a Mack bobsled coaster. It is probably my favourite of the three I’ve done so far down to its lengthy layout and setting.    Two of their three other coasters are Sos Numberis and Vol D'Icare . SOS Numberis is a neat little kiddie coaster which does numerous laps.    Vol D'Icare is somewhat more bizarre as I’ve never seen a coaster like this, however the brakes are very sharp, almost to the point of an emergency stop!  Parc Asterix hosts four water rides, this includes a fun picturesque rapids, a Tutuki Splash style ride with random water effects and a cherishing log flume with a random (yet wonderful) tunnel section with fountains.  They also have Oxygenarium, a raft ride similar to Storm Surge with a whacky theme. It is also much enjoyable too and you don’t get wet feet.  Storm Surge could’ve been special!   The park holds it’s share of flat rides too, including a magic carpet and a Polyp spinner type ride. Both were fun.    Sadly the Obilsk Disko was closed both days we were there.  Some of the other attractions include a charming boat ride with random effects, an above average sky-ride and what might be the best vintage cars ride I’ve ever been on! They also featured what must be one of the most unique and crazy mad houses out there. This features three pre-shows. It is probably my third favourite madhouse of the eight I’ve ridden.    New for this year (which we didn’t realise until after we’d visited), was the Menhir 4D, an amusing yet charming cinema show starring the Asterix. I love the unique effect at the end, which resulted in Menhir throwing the magic item out of the screen and into the cinema itself. You don’t notice this until the end.    There were a few shows on whilst we were there which included (Asterix VS Romans), where the Asterix face off against the Romans. It is fixed several times but the Asterix win in the end. It also features an appearance from Dogmatix, the dog in the series. Hope the dog is looked after properly.  There are some pretty areas in the park itself, whether that be the Greek area, the “fruit themed” restaurant or most of the park in general.  We stayed at Hotel Cite Suspendue during our visit, which is one of two onsite hotels.  It’s setting is unique, given that the rooms are scattered about in numerous wooden style buildings as opposed to just one area, giving a more unique and natural feel.  Towers should’ve done something like this instead of Staryourgazing Pods and Enchanted Village.   For the full experience and convenience, on site is best. It’s also worth mentioning the park is pretty much in the middle of nowhere. Your nearest offsite hotel is likely several miles away and you will probably need a taxi if you don't t have a car!   The Downsides: Not park is perfect (even Europa), so there naturally some flaws here.  Firstly is Gouderix, this Vekoma coaster is one of (if not) the oldest coasters in the park  and probably the signature attraction until Tonnere opened.  Across the waterside, it looks rather pretty, however when it comes to riding it certainly isn’t.    Goiderix has to honestly be one of the most uncomfortable coasters I have ever ridden, violently knocking me from side to side numerous times as it aggressively completes it’s  circuit. It honestly makes Colossus look smooth and was the worst operated coaster. Someone get in the people who re-tracked Python!   Secondly the food. Theme parks rarely specialise in food (unless you are Phantasialand), especially when have to cater for thousands of people and have to make profit.  The food here wasn’t great at all, often tasting processed, watered down and with strange flavourings. The baguette place by the Cauldron ride was the only we really found the food tolerable and closing most outlets around 2/3pm doesn’t help. Port Aventura still stands as my least favourite for park food.  Third and finally is Transdemonium, the park’s ghost train dark ride attraction. For unknown reasons, the attraction was completely closed up with no information about regarding what is happening. It has even disappeared off the website.   We spoke to several staff members regarding this and the general answer was the ride was under renovation work and was expected to reopen somepoint between Halloween and next year.  Take this with a pinch of salt!    Conclusion: Parc Asterix is a charming lovely park with some quirky yet original themes and attractions including some quality coasters.    Presentation, operations and the staff were all generally excellent, however I would suggest either plucking up on french or using a reliable translation app as the majority of staff speak little to no English.    A few things such as food and others, do detract things from this park slightly, but then again nowhere is perfect.    It honestly surprises me how overlooked this place is despite it’s relatively easy location. It is worthy of a visit whether you do or do not go to Disneyland Paris.   Visit Parc Asterix! It’s underrated,         

After a day spent doing some random stuff in Berlin, the weekend was the main reason for the trip: the two random small parks just outside Leipzig. The first one was Belantis; a medium-sized park owned by Parque Reunidos (who also own the likes of Movie Park Germany, Bobbejaanaland, Mirabilandia,...). It was sadly an extremely wet day, with showers pretty much non-stop from about 8 in the morning. Fortunately, it meant the park was dead, and the park didn't close anything major in the weather. So, moving on...
 
Huracan
Arguably the park's headline attraction is Huracan, a Gerstlauer Eurofighter which opened in 2010, but was largely retracked this past winter. It rides as you'd expect a Eurofighter to ride really: fun, little bit uncomfortable, but nothing extremely intolerable. It has a nice unique layout, but doesn't really have any stand out moments. So yeah, in short: a fun enough but somewhat bland experience.

Fun fact: Belantis also opened up a kiddie coaster called Huracanito, a ride where you have to be less than 1.2m tall to ride! tbh, it looked too intense for me.
 
Cobra des Amun Ra
The park's newest coaster is a Gerstlauer family coaster. Themed around a snake belonging to the Egyptian god Ra, this had a surprisingly nice indoor queue which was rather well themed. The coaster itself was actually really good: nice and whippy, well paced and you get two circuits on it. A nice surprise coaster!

 
 
Drachenritt
The park's final coaster is a Gerstlauer (see the trend?) bobsled, and actually a mirror clone of Paultons. Having not done that yet, I didn't know what to expect, but it was a ton of fun, with lots of fun pops of airtime, and a nicely themed experience! Again, a really fun ride.
 
On paper, the park has a nice selection of non-coaster rides too. The true highlight has to be Fluch des Pharao, a log flume ride with Stormforce 10-style boats, which takes you into a 31m high pyramid. Though not very wet, the ride has a few quirky tricks, is nicely themed inside the pyramid and caught me off guard a couple of times. Very much a typical 'wtf' ride you'd find in Europe! The park also has a Gerstlauer sky fly in Götterflug, though I didn't see anyone manage and flips (hard to tell how much the weather played a part in that) and a random pirate drop tower that sways side to side which was equally very fun. There's a lot more too (including a random mini zip line which is free), but it's all pretty bog-standard and not worth mentioning..

 
The park has one major dark ride in Verlies des Grauens (Dungeon of Horror): a madhouse ride which very much feels like it could be taking place in a dungeon. Of course, madhouses in a foreign language can be difficult to grasp, but this hasn't stopped me enjoying some out there, and with my basic German knowledge I was able to get the gist (some sort of crystal had been stolen and it relates to the wizard Merlin and only we can get it back or something). But even with that vague context, the madhouse portion was weak: very little seemed to happen, and it was all rather unimpressive, and probably the worst madhouse I've done. Even if I'd fully understood the story (I think the madhouse section is something to do with guests being tricked by the supposed good-guy in a massive plot twist), I doubt I'd have enjoyed it much: everyone around us looked rather unenthusiastic. 
 
This is probably making Belantis sound like a pretty alright park, but honestly, it was very mediocre. No doubt the bad weather didn't help, the lack of people on park and the fact I bruised my ribs the days before and was in a reasonable amount of pain probably detracted from my fun even more. But really, the park just didn't feel like it had much to offer. The Eurofighter isn't something anyone will really be clambering to re-ride. The family rides are fun but pretty standard. And whilst some rides are nicely themed (in particular the newer ones), the park as a whole is very devoid of anything fun and interesting to make you feel like you're at a theme park. When the park has such an average line up, that doesn't help.
 
One final thing though: the staff on park were fantastic. All very friendly and helpful and super upbeat despite the weather. They were all really chatty, most spoke good English too (handy when my German failed me!), and just in general made the day a tiny bit brighter. So that's always nice to see.
 
The park closed at 5 (though staff were telling us they were considering closing early due to the weather and lack of people), but we ultimately left at 3ish to dry off and prepare to spend the evening in Leipzig. Before heading into Leipzig, we stopped off at the Völkerschlachtdenkmal, which is a monument to the Battle of the Nations, and stands at an impressive 300ft tall. You can pay to enter, but we just had a look around the outside. We wandered around Leipzig for a bit, had some food, then ended up going to a bowling alley near our hotel on the outskirts of the city centre. The city was heaving following a football game, and we quickly found out that Leipzig was quite a 'hipster' city, leaving us with little to entertain us really.
 

Völkerschlachtdenkmal
 
So yes: Belantis left me ultimately unfulfilled but equally, I wasn't surprised. Leipzig is a bit meh too. Could Freizeitpark Plohn save the weekend? Find out soon...
 
NB: all pictures stolen from online as my phone hated the rain
 

Many years ago a man visited a smallish yet popular Danish amusement park. That place was Tivoli Gardens. He was inspired by the charm and character of the place which lead him on to creating his own park. That man was Walt Disney.
Tivoli Gardens has been somewhere I have always wanted to visit, whether that be it’s significant history, interesting pallet of attractions, or to say I have visited the fourth most visited European park? These were just some of the reasons, not to mention ‘’technically’’ following Walt’s footsteps.   Opening in 1843, Tivoli is the second oldest amusement park in the world (after Bakken). The park is literally in the City centre of Copenhagen (Denmark) putting it firmly into the category of city parks. Like Liseberg, Grona Lund and Blackpool Pleasure Beach.  The park features no fewer than three entrances, including the iconic main entrance. We decided to take this one.  Upon entering, you are greeted upon some pretty  picturesque gardens and open spaces, which make for an ideal first impression and one contrasting the busy street outside.  One of the first attractions we visited was the iconic Ruschterbahn (Roller Coaster). This attraction dates back to 1914, making it one of the oldest attractions in the park and maybe the world.  Despite being nestled into one of the park’s corners, it was definitely one of the most popular attractions. And for a great reason! The ride is so simple yet perfect, a brake-person rides on the train with you and controls the speed as you go through numerous drops and turns.  I can safely say the Ruscteebahn is my favourite attraction in the park. It’s effectiveness of completing simple tasks so perfectly is satisfying. It is easily my favourite of the three Scenic Railway attractions I have done too. Tivoli’s second headline coaster is The Demon (Daemonen),a B&M floorless which opened in 2004. This must be one of the smallest B&M’s in the world, with it’s compact layout. There seemed to be some rows dedicated to VR in the station, however we didn’t see anyone use it whilst we were there.  Another VR failure? It definitely isn’t my favourite B&M out there, however it’s impressive what the park have managed to fit into what is a very small footprint (for B&M standards). Better than Dragon Khan though.  The park did have a Mack powered coaster, however this was in the process of being replaced whilst we were out there. “Adds another to the list of spited creds”. Our final coaster was Kamelen (Camel), an adorable Zierer . This replaced their older junior coaster. The attraction features an Arabian style theme (like other rides in the area). Six laps too? Woo! There are two dark rides inside Tivoli, one of these is The Flying Trunk. This Mack  ominmover attraction depicts numerous scenes based on the books from renowned Danish author Hans Christian Anderson.  The attraction was sweet and relaxing. It is certainly impressive how much they have managed to fit into what is a relatively small building. The ride is built partially below ground level. The Mine is the park’s second dark ride and is just totally bizarre. You go around in small boats shooting targets, although the scoring system is not particularly clear. The guns are either similar to Wands, or things one will say is less appropriate! The ride is essentially a tiny flume dark ride with lasers. The scenes are charming despite the potential lack of context. Tomb surprisingly disliked most of the attraction.  Tivoli packs a large selection of flat rides, some of which have to be the craziest out there, Vertigo is no exception. This crazy contraption flings you 360 whilst turning at rapid speeds to the point of almost making the former Slammer look tame. I enjoyed it, but literally experienced my limit for thrill rides! Some of their other flat rides include a pretty Steampunk themed Air Race, an S&S drop tower (least this one launches down) and a Crazy inverted Magic Carpet. I found this one the most nauseating, it probably didn’t help that girl opposite me looked like she was going to vomit any moment tbh.  Amongst this, they also had a highly impressive Fun House, which was free flowing and located underneath the Ruschterbahn.  They also had  an adorable Vintage Cars attraction which is amazing, because fountains and a vintage Ferris Wheel. We ran out of time for the Dodgems, Carousels, Land-Train and Sea Storm (style) attractions.   Annoyingly some attractions were unavailable on our day of visit, including the Fata Morgana which was an iron condor style ride, a crazy mutated breakdance attraction (which replaced their old breakdance) and the sky flier. Tomb was particularly disappointed by the later, especially when it was actually operating the next day too.  Just like Efteling! The park also plays hosts to their Illuminations show every evening/night. Essentially a smaller scale Aquanura , the performance features fountains, lights, fire and other effects. Whilst Aquanura is more impressive and contextual, Illuminations still makes for a cherishing and worthwhile watching.  The rides shut at 21:45 on the day we were visiting, due to their Friday Rock event, where their centre stage hosts notable Music artists performing. We watched some of the music even though it wasn’t really our cup of tea. We left just before the end, grabbing a McDonald’s on the way.  Final Thoughts and Reflections: Tivoli Gardens is undoubtably a charming and lovely park to visit and something of a national treasure to Denmark.  Despite it’s relatively small size it hosts a very reasonable diversity  of attractions which suit the park. The grounds, landscaping and architecture are lavishing.  Whilst not themed as such, the park are definitely trying to allocate different stylings to each area of the park. whether that be Space/Steampunk, Asian or Middle Eastern sections, which are reasonably distinguishable. The park was generally charming and the majority of staff friendly and helpful. It is probably also one of the better parks for food quantity and quality. Smorrebrod, a cultural delight. My only major criticism I can really give was the lack of audio in most of the park. Whilst the dark rides and toilets featured audio, there were very few other areas of the park (especially main areas) where there was nothing. Whilst I don’t expect audio blaring out left right and centre, it would be pleasant if a few more areas featured audio to enhance further atmosphere to the place. Just something ambient and reflective here and there would do the job. I would recommend a visit here to anyone, whether your after a park with charm, class, thrilling attractions or all three! Tivoli Gardens is worth seeing at least once in everyone’s lifetime theme park lover for not!  Join me soon in part two as I cover some of the other things to see in Copenhagen outside of Tivoli Gardens, where I witness this City of modern fairytales by Land, air and sea to see what treasures and cultural gems are discovered.  Thanks For Reading!