December 11, 201410 yr comment_198887 I now have a job helping a one-armed typist whenever she needs to type capital letters. It's shift work.
December 11, 201410 yr comment_198888 What did the man say when he lost his right arm THATS ALL I HAVE ``LEFT``
December 26, 201410 yr comment_199607 Merlin remind me of a multistory car park They disapoint me on so many levels
December 26, 201410 yr comment_199608 When Minecraft were bought by Microsoft...you could say things were taken up a Notch.
December 27, 201410 yr comment_199620 A man walks into a bar... Ouch Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
March 14, 201510 yr comment_205145 (I'm probably gonna get the boot for this) I walked into a cafe and this bloke drinking an orange flavoured fizzy drink started yelling amusing insults at me. The last thing he said to me after that was "Great Fanta!" *sighs*
April 17, 201510 yr comment_207491 So upset, a good friend of mine died of heartburn yesterday, can't believe gavisgone.
April 17, 201510 yr comment_207499 What happens when the main character of A Nightmare on Elm Street walks into a kids' pizza restaurant filled with malfunctioning animatronic animals? A huge confusion between first names is triggered.
May 13, 201510 yr comment_209049 As you know, most petrol stations have their own jet wash. It's pointless! There's nowhere for them to land...
July 1, 201510 yr comment_212305 Katy Perry tried to buy out a convenient today' Unfortunately the residents would have nun of that
July 13, 201510 yr comment_212964 I was once confronted by a boxer at a boxing match. Boxer: "I could kill you." Me: "Pardon?" Boxer: "I'm a heavyweight." Me: "I can stop the documents from blowing off your desk." Boxer: "What?" Me: "I'm a paperweight." Boxer: "What do you actually know about boxing?" Me: "I've met Mike Tyson." Boxer: "Tyson sucks!" Me: "That's Dyson."
August 7, 201510 yr comment_214268 Some of the YouTube comments I've seen. I watched jacksepticeye play NL2, he went on a dive coaster. Someone says "That rollercoaster is a replication of GRIFFEN, what other rollercoaster stops you right there, right before the drop?" I replied with a list of Dive Coasters, but someone ignored me and said "That's what I was thinking, what other rollercoaster drops into holes?" I've also been in an argument with someone who called me a "stupid f... idiot" for saying Nemesis has a 104ft drop, because apparently it has a 43ft drop. I told him to Google it... He deleted his comment shortly after.
August 18, 201510 yr comment_215309 Some FNaF jokes I came up with today (some may be a little rude...and others may be rubbish ). 'When Golden Freddy attacks me, I can never tell if the noise made is the suited character screaming...or the person inside taking a massive dump.' 'I was in my office one night and the phone rang. I picked it up with a trembling hand and the guy on the other end just said "H-Hello? H-Hello!". I said "You sound nervous!". He said "I know. That's why your phone's trembling!"' 'I turned up for work one night and I was greeted by a figure with a hat and clawed hands stood on stage. I said "Wrong franchise. Now get out!"' 'Never work at Freddy Fazbear's if you're a ventriloquist. It's really embarrassing to be attacked by your own puppet...' Okay I'm done now...
September 27, 20159 yr comment_219038 I've put mine under spoiler tags as it's inappropriate for younger readers. What genital problem did the Lizard have? A reptile dysfunction
October 12, 20159 yr comment_220687 Oh no, prepare yourself for the wrath of my bad puns. What do you call a biased hippo? A hippocrite!
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