Fred

It's more than that, there's a fair few issues to be solved first.
Best thing on twitter:

Bitterly dissappointed with legos new area, in that unlike the planning applications everything looks like wild woods, just with a pirate ship in there.Pirates Training Camp (rat trap) is alright with the new back area.. but the entire of the old area looks rotten and mank, so completely contrasts with its new part.It plays the mutiny bay stuff as well, which is frustrating as it is nowhere near on the same level as mutiny - the entire area just feels so typically lego cheap, which is mad considering they now have the tussauds studios expertise which have done amazing transformations at chessie and ugland this year.

I thought it was the logflume at American Adventure?

Banned for visiting thorpe that little bit too often.

It was meant to be a crashed boat?
Well, that's me being ignorant for 10yrs.

They had kids on the ride 10yrs ago. They managed to load and dispatch without killing or injuring anyone within 45 seconds.
Oh how things have changed for the worst on here.

Yay thanks for ruining peoples efforts.
My favourite bit currently is how Bubbleworks photos now include the "smile for the camera" sign in the back of all photos due to its awful positioning. Nicely done.
Other than that, I think they've done quite well with what they have there.. they've made it very dark so you can't see much of the rubbish anymore, and they've made it very colourful just as a dark ride should be. Happy on that front, apart from that all they need to do is just need to remove the entire ride and start again.

You're an idiot.
 
Got no time for people who bully.

Thanks for that post Mer - It's always good to see how far we've come on from utter rubbish music in the past few years.
 
Still got some way to go in some areas, but this is definitely a track to be proud of going.

Phantasialand is one of the easiest to get to by public transport too. Flight into cologne (there's approximately 4 million flights to cologne from across the UK every day), then a simple 2 trains and a bus (taking a whole 45 minutes in total from plane to park) and you're there. Proper cheap too.

But you're not going alone. You're going with strangers from the internet.

Not everyone is earning 21KAAAAAAAY Benin

SUCH A REPETITIVE TOPIC SURELY THERE'S SOMETHING ELSE TO TALK ABOUT WITH VAMPIRE
 
Oh, no there isn't 

Look I get that we all get frustrated when staff can't deliver effective throughput, but calling them dummies is a bit much.

And on the 7th day, God unleashed his firey wrath on Alton Towers for not being open until 7 pm at weekends.

Well to be fair they are building Shrek's Adventure elsewhere.....

Next they'll add a hastily crossed-out "Space Station Zero" to the Flying Fish sign

The original plan was apparently June closure. But yup. A whole one member of staff is a huge saving. Love it.

The original plan was apparently June closure. But yup. A whole one member of staff is a huge saving. Love it.

One ride is unfortunate, two rides is bad. Five rides... unacceptable.

They couldn't even be bothered to put this one back together,
 

 
It's a bloody outrage I tell ya.

There is no grey area - they get fastrack, so join fastrack queues where they exist. Where they don't exist they have a certain way of entering, as labelled in their guide.
 
Hosts/Staff not obeying by these rules or not understanding them are where the issues lay. It's that which causes so much confusion and hatred of the pass, and the staff by the VIP holders too. You need consistency in Theme Park operations, and when it's a costly product even more so.

Don't worry - next year you'll have queue-times.com to inform you

To be fair, it can be fact. The park has looked a right craphole in recent years. Even cleaning a pathway will make the park look best it's done in years. Fact.