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Hi, Long time lurker, 1st time poster. Excuse the long post, there is an on-topic observation at the bottom TP has been a big part of my life, from visiting the park in the late 80's to throughout the 90's. I then worked there for 15 years (2000 - 2014), in a variety of departments. Retail - some of the best times of my life (I've made life long friends from working in this department) Park Development and Planning - one of the most rewarding jobs I have had to date (see below) Facilities Management/Engineering - this is where my journey ended Park Development and Planning - I was the project lead for the land expansion project, and was involved in some of the early design/planning activities on SAW The Ride, SAW Alive, Kobra (CWoA), The Swarm, and an early Ghost Train concept. Whilst working in this department I learnt some fascinating history about the park. For example, did you know when the park was being constructed in the 1970's, RMC flew in an Imagineer from the States to help design the entrance and car park? Anyways, back on topic... I visited the RTP's for the 1st time (since leaving TP) last year and noticed that the overall quality has dropped across all 3 parks (CWoA probably was my favourite park out of the visits last year TBH). I noticed that at AT, unless you like roller coasters or kids rides, there actually isn't that much there. Duel should have been removed and replaced, or even reverted back to its former scary self years ago, and Hex is a shadow of its former self. I have never liked the Rapids since they removed the old boats. TP - DBGT - Ok this was not what I had originally envisioned for this plot of land. I found it to be an interesting concept, however it was not delivered well. The queue lines design (or lack of) makes it one of the worst (if not the worst) queues I have ever been in. I strangely found IACGMOH to be quite an enjoyable experience. I think TP are now in a weird position where they have got to develop two large areas of the park - the island next to Swarm (Island A) or Loggers. Which one do you do first? Island A needs that development to remove the dead end at Swarm (Parks should never have dead ends, they need to be free flowing), or do you develop Loggers which is a dead corner of the park? Is the investment there? CWoA seems to have flown under the radar a bit, and appears to have missed a lot of the Merlin clusterf**ks that have happened over the years. However, the drop tower replacing Rameses is again lacklustre and screams of "cant be bothered to develop this park properly"... Which leads me onto why I think these parks are suffering: The Smiler accident - I should imagine the insurance premiums across the UK parks are now extremely high, effecting large scale investments As far as I am aware, Merlin did not operate any theme parks until acquiring Legoland and the Tussuad's Group. I've noticed that all of the Merlin investments to date have either been lacklustre or poorly delivered (Ok Wickerman was good, however not too sure a pre-show was required - even though the show is good). I think there is a lack of interest within the company (I found this out when I was working at TP, and was shocked to find so many senior people not interested in the industry - a lot of them had never been to a Disney park... Its just a job to them) If you look at what parks around the world are announcing as new attractions, Merlin's UK offering is waaayyy behind everyone else. One of the most heated discussions I had whilst working at TP was surrounding the lack of a decent family zone/area. My argument was that parks such as Six Flags and Cedar Point (parks TP tries to emulate) all have decent (ish) kid friendly/family friendly areas. The answer from management was a return on the investment would not be possible as "how would they sell it"? Hopefully when (if) Paramount Park gets built, it will give Merlin a kick up the backside in getting there act together. Just my two cents... M

I have... But of course, you'd never get anything wrong. ?

One post, ONE GODDAMN POST...

Shots fired from tulleys ?

- Fan boys ‘designing’ audio for Thorpe Park’s Fright Nights and then watching the forums for comments and getting all defensive because nobody really understands the complete lack of artistic or creative design. “Woo cameos from the theme park community - intense!” - Flashing, multicoloured LED park wide lighting with no design or thought whatsoever - Significant lack of maze design, coherent theme and complete lack of quality - No Big Top - A non-show in the Dome where actors chase guests to some music because the competency to build the maze was no longer available - Another laughable, confused, messy marketing “campaign” - Black walled mazes (oh, they almost left Fright Nights) - Vulcan Peak Goodbye Fright Nights.

Can confirm it's not going backwards lads.

Famous last words

This whole thing is the biggest joke since Storm Surge and DBGT Year 1

Hiii guys, Ryan and I have decided to do you forum lot a solid and chalk up the provisional meet calendar for the 2017 season with all of the provisional dates where possible. As you may see it is incredibly busy with a few new and different things, so please do leave a comment or drop a PM to either of us with what you think! **please note this is a rough, preliminary outline of what we'd expect 2017 to look like, dates and even venues may well change!** January: Guildford meet (Saturday 21st) February: Adventure Island meet (Saturday 11th) March: Thorpe Park open meet (Saturday 25th) April: Chessington meet (Saturday 22nd) May: Legoland meet (Saturday 20th) June: Alton Towers weekender (Saturday 17th/Sunday 18th) July: Ministry of Sound meet (Saturday 22nd) August: Oakwood weekender (Saturday 19th/Sunday 20th) September: Port Aventura (Saturday 9th/Sunday 10th) October: Fright Nights meet (Sunday 15th) November: Alton Towers Fireworks weekender (TBC/'whenever that is') December: London Christmas meet (Saturday 16th) I hope everyone has a happy new year, and I can't wait to see both old and new faces next year

I think we need a "Most Desparate to Want an Award" category at this rate...

I have a few theories. None of its concrete evidence and is pure conjecture on my part. - The failure of the Swarm. We all know that Merlin were initially disappointed by the Swarms first season. Many reasons were cited (which I'm sure those in the know can find) but essentially, I think this lack of interest in the new coaster dented confidence in what the park could do. Baring in mind, 2011 saw one of the biggest years the park had and that was on the back of Storm Surge. Cheaper investment bought massive returns. - The next Big thing. I think Thorpe has fallen into the trap that Six Flags did. By appealing solely to the thrill sector you severely limit interest. Teenagers want the next big thing and in the 00s, Thorpe easily provided that thrill. Hit after hit, success after success. Coasters galore, several years where we got two flat rides. That investment was unsustainable. Now though, rides like Colossus, Inferno, Tidal Wave, Detonator & Vortex are old hat. They are unmaintained and look their age. Thorpe were unable to drum up interest with The Swarm, Derren Brown opened late and was pretty weak and the less said about the reliance on IP to drive interest the better. The park has a real image problem which leads me to.. - Branding. Thorpe has a huge perception problem. Is it a thrill park, is it a park for up for it families, do we make X a family coaster then two years later refurbish it for adults. Do we change our market to families and then close the biggest family ride we've got (Loggers Leap). Do we advertise our park in our 2019 advert or have an image of goats, donuts and a hotel room. None of this evokes excitement. It smacks of a park throwing anything, everything at the wall to see what sticks and new general managers are not given enough time to evolve/change the place before they are fired and a new one bought in. - The Smiler crash. Ironically, four years later, I feel like the crash has had this weird echoing effect at Thorpe compared to the other two main Merlin parks. It's almost like it never recovered from the initial drop in attendance whilst Alton has recovered well thanks to Wicker Man and Chessington never saw the drop because of its family audience. You could say the lack of investment is really hurting Thorpe right now but then there seems to be no steps to change this. - The park itself. It's fallen a long way since the hefty days of 2006. If they are to recover the place they need to sort out their offering. Having abandoned flat rides and log flumes standing doesn't help, neither does the game stalls or the lack of maintenance and paint jobs on their rollercoasters. The basics need to be sorted for Thorpe to recover. Chessington was exactly the same way in the 00's but that now feels like the strongest Merlin park IMO. If Thorpe can sort this then they might be able to get back to the top.

The unprofessionalism all round from Thorpe Park is shocking. And no offence but it's pretty embarassing to see a self-appointed theme park 'personality' seemingly using their job at Thorpe Park as self validation for their inflated enthusiast opions. I know many enthusiasts (in the real sense of the word, not this enthusiast "community" cult ideology) who are extremely hard working and have been in the attraction industry for years. They make it all happen to entertain others, they dont get any wider recognition and they dont seek it either. Whereas this Jordan character trying to get PR attention at any opportunity, the tweets, that dumb enthusiast awards thing and many other enthusiast cliques, seem to be far more interested in themselves than working in entertainment. Or getting their enthusiast friends 'in' behind the scenes so they can boast about themselves too. Thorpe Park needs to get back to basics, get back in touch with the public (especially if it's wanting to go for families more like it says it does) and offer a good value day out. Not a day in a tarmac car park sponsored by a hundred fads, with signs constantly reminding you you're on "the island" (whoops, you built over most views of the water years ago!), and then getting egotists to tell others why they're wrong online. Theme parks are really just about having a laugh out with friends, with a day of fun. Isn't that what we all got into it for? People behind the scenes need to be open minded, less self congratulatory and sort the park out properly. But I guess massively glamorising the 'brand' to the point that it bears no resemblance to the park is what they're better at and all they're interested in currently.

Apologies for the long pedantic post, but to save misunderstanding, here's the full story behind Vampire's audio over the years! Obviously all the following is more technical info, no guests are gonna go in Vampire thinking 'hang on this is the wrong mix' – but the point is for the music to sound good and have good effect, and clearly this is not happening today. The ride currently sounds awful. Here is where it gets pretty complicated and you need to consider how technology has changed massively over time to get your head around it. Let's break it down to: Production tapes (pre dubbing, pre downsampling) 1990 Ride 'dual zoned' mix 1990 stereo cassette mix 2016 Smart mix The original music would have been produced from tapes as a high quality production master by the composer in 1990. A standard mix for listening would have been in stereo obviously, but for use in the ride it was mixed differently. Theme park audio is usually always in mono mix, or 'multi mono' if its a score for a whole ride that changes as you move through it. This is because a stereo image requires a left and a right speaker, but in an attraction you're constantly moving around space with usually multiple speakers playing the same track, so it makes more sense to have it in mono. Vampire actually had a 'dual' zoned effect where the same music played throughout the station, where the organ stage played the organ instrument, and the backing track played through the rest the station (guitar in both). This opened up the sound a bit more and gave the effect of the organ playing the actual organ part. To do this effect, a mix with split organ and backing was sent to Sparks (who produced the Vampire station), with one on the L channel and other on R. This wasn't a traditional stereo mix, it was more of an installation mix, so would sound great standing in the station, but would sound bizarre played on a home stereo. Sparks also dubbed it with the familiar screams and thunder sounds. This mix was unique to any other mixes, which is why all other versions sound slightly different. However, because of the technical limitations of the time, the ride track needed to be downsampled to play on solid state EPROM chips, which could only hold a certain amount of memory. The downsampling means it's lacking bass, but otherwise is good and wouldnt have been noticeable on the big station sound system – as anyone who went in Vampire in the 90s would remember it still sounded great! However, in mono, it wouldnt sound so good in isolation on a home stereo. This zoned effect was lost in Vampire around 2000 when the sound system was changed. From then on it played as one zone throughout the station, but was the same 'mix'. Then there was a souvenir cassette that was sold in the Chessington shop in the 90s, this was a very different mix to the ride version – and was in stereo (for listening). This is the one more commonly heard online. Although a more polished mix, the sound quality has always been dire, because the same warbly digital transfer has been passed around since forever (the original cassettes are hard to come by). Somehow this was the track that Chessington replaced the original with in 2014 when the sound system was changed to mp3 playback. What! It sounds awful due to the poor quality of the transfer from cassette and is not edited to loop correctly. Then a few years back the composer put up his own version (the Smart mix), from his own tapes, pre-downsampling... BUT it was actually yet another mix, half the 'cassette' version and half the 'original' version. This is the best quality version of the track available, but doesnt have the zoned effect or the 'rawer' guitar. After years of trying to find the original track, I first found just the backing part on its own, which only had the guitar and organ on it faintly. This is what's on Soundcloud, edited to sound less 'mono' and with the organ part turned up a bit. More recently I finally found the organ track to go with it, so will update the Soundcloud track soon. Have sent this to Chessington. These are the downsampled, dubbed tracks that played in the ride from 1990 to around 2000. So, not full listening quality and would sound weird played on a stereo, but would sound good restored in the dual zones in the station. Much better than the current dodgy mp3 being played. Ideally, a brand new mix should be struck from the original master tapes (if they still exist with the composer) to recreate the dual zoning and the more 'raw' original mix – but without the downsampling, since this is no longer necessary with today's playback technology. Combine this with a repaired sound system and it would sound amazing. However, the original composer seems to be completely uncontactable. So, there's the saga of Vampire's audio! Once sounded classic, now sounding very lame with the poor recording they're using at the moment. But, simply putting back the orginal mix on a broken, mono system probably wouldnt make much difference. What it needs is a new, overhauled sound system and a full quality zoned mix.

Towers are getting a woodie though.

Alright, I've had a day to think over what these dungeons are like after experiencing it last Sunday and are going to be brutally honest with it now after the experience I had and will present my opinion of it as a paying customer who dedicated nearly an hour of their 10am - 5pm day on this thing; not as a theme park blogger who is in Merlin/Alton's good graces and paid zilch to experience it. Contrary to all the positive reviews that are going around right now for it from all the theme park bloggers/vloggers/YouTube "celebrities", I'm sorry, but this is without a doubt the worst Dungeon I have done and I would go as far to say the worst attraction Alton Towers have ever given us in the 21 years I have been visiting this place year-on-year since 1998, and that's saying something. It goes almost entirely against what makes all the other Dungeons enjoyable attractions and it falls flat on delivering a comprehensive experience for guests with no proper thought or imagination put into the product and here's why. All the other Dungeons I have experienced immerse you properly into each scene with details and theming across every corner, from the flooring, walls, scenery and the actors. Despite many of them having bare roofing such as the London one for example, you tend to forget about it all with every scene and focus your attention on the actor and surroundings, as per you should, so this missing detail never really posed a problem for me with the others. With the Alton Towers one however, the very opposite occurs. For every scene you go through, I kid you not, there are flat black walls literally everywhere you look from the sides, behind you, the ceiling and even amongst the theming where the actor stands. It look horrendous and every room made you feel like you were in a big black box that had been assembled quickly and cheaply with timber wall panels. There was no texture to any of them, no deformation and no disguising of the walls in any room to make you feel as though you are in a dungeon. It just looks incredibly lazy and cheap and no attempt whatsoever was done to immerse guests 360 degrees unlike all the other Dungeons. The entrance to the attraction I still hold the view looks disgustingly ugly and cheap. Whilst in-person it looks a little better than through a screen, you can tell it was built on a budget with the randomly placed barrels and crates outside the entrance, along with the temporary fire torches fenced off. Most unforgiving of all is there is still an entire section of the entrance to the left in front of the lift towers with nothing but a giant 30ft black wall. Clearly the park ran out of wooden supports to cover this up properly during construction, so their solution to this problem was to pop down to the local B&Q and buy 50L of Dulux EasyCare Rich Black paint to cover up the shadows of the deceased Oompa Loompas peeking through the 2D windows. I'm guessing with the amount of black walls inside the attraction they had plenty to spare to cover this up too... Take a look here at what I mean. Taken on Sunday 24th March. It's so revolting to look at: As for the Black River boat ride, it's the same story - paint every wall black and leave it. The ride follows through the same route as Charlie, but believe it or not, it's now even barer than before with very little decoration or theming present in any portion. There are a few projectors on flat walls as you go round showing the shadows of victims being tortured, a couple of water jets to get you wet, a single animatronic which just bobs up and down ever so slightly in a cauldron, a single projector on a mannequin head and a single oddly-placed smoke machine. That is quite literally it for 4 minutes straight. There are no proper special effects anywhere inside, many zones had no audio playing, there are just black walls and tunnels for 80% of it and most unforgivable is the park were too lazy to remove the old theming from Charlie such as the water wheel in the station and the mirrored section towards the end where Sonic used to be on Toyland Tours. There is so much empty space and wasted area on this ride now that it makes Charlie look like a masterpiece compared to "Black Walls - The Ride". It's so, so bad. From here, it's pretty much your bog standard Dungeon attraction where there are various scenes stolen copied from other existing ones. Each scene did have its little twist added to the script referencing Alton Towers instead, but 95% of it was exactly the same as all the others. The Plague Doctor was 100% the same as the London one (though with very few effects) and so was The Torturer. The Judge scene was a little different but followed the same procedure - 3 people chosen, 1 found guilty after just saying where they were from. The Highwayman was identical to Ms. Lovett's pie shop mixed with Sweeney Todd at London where it used identical sound effects and audio and had the moving chairs with prodders. Lastly, the Haunting for the last scene was pretty good overall I will admit with some nice use of lighting and sound effects, similar to Witches of Warwick. Was a decent finale. As for the acting though, I've gotta hand it to those in there, they did a fantastic job in every scene. The actors performed brilliantly with plenty of adult humour which I liked and were interacting with guests very well. In fact, I would go as far to say the actors Alton have for this Dungeon are better than any other I have done before, so well done for hiring the right people! But that all aside, even though the acting was brilliant, the rest of it was a total mess. The biggest problem I have is the fact so many areas of the attraction consist of nothing but black walls everywhere in every scene and it's the dominating and most noticeable feature of every room. Each scene I would say is 70:30 in favour of black walls to theming and it looks really rushed in many areas, especially the transitions between each scene which once again are just black walls with no theming or detail put into them either. It is quite literally one giant yet claustrophobic rectangular black box one after the other for the majority of the experience. With the other dungeons, you at least have stuff to see, hear and feel which the London one is especially good at. But for the Alton Towers one? The only thing you can smell is the fumes of freshly coated black Dulux paint mixed with touching the sloppily finished un-sanded walls, and flooring which still has outlines of Charlie's theming and fencing present. It really is genuinely like this inside. The thing to bear in mind is that this is an attraction every guest unless you are an AT Premium Pass Holder will need to pay £5 for in order to experience, and I am telling you right now, I was really cheesed off my money went on this experience after finishing. There is no way in hell this is worth the upcharge the park is enforcing, because you can get a much better Dungeon experience across any other corner of the country for free compared to this if you are a MAP. It's completely unjustifiable in my view given there is a serious lack of quality and finish present in this version and you are frankly better off getting two medium Costa cappuccinos in Forbidden Valley for your fiver. Now, you might say "it's not finished yet hence the black walls", but I would then question why the heck are the park charging customers for a half-baked product if it's evidently not ready? Either open it when it's 100% right (yeah, just like DBGT remember...), or have some decency and not charge guests at all for it until it is fully completed. Lastly, I want to emphasise on a point @Martin Doyle made above a few posts ago. You might be reading and hearing many great reviews out there for the Alton Towers Dungeon right now from all the big and famous theme park fans out there with a massive following, but please take what you hear from them with a massive grain of salt. These are the same groups of people that praised Thorpe Park's Fright Nights last year with some going as far to say it was the "best Fright Nights yet", so it's obviously evident some of them are in Merlin's good graces when writing their reviews and are restricted on what they really think about it. Instead, I implore you to focus your attention and effort on those who have actually paid the £5 admission for this attraction and dedicated an hour of their time in the park for it. These reviews are far more credible and realistic through my eyes as they tend to speak their mind properly with no filters in place and aren't towing the company's line of being overly-positive about everything Merlin creates. To summarise my experience of the attraction, it would be this - a lacklustre, short-sighted and rushed mess that made Charlie and the Chocolate Factory look phenomenal in comparison. Still, it is better than nothing right?............Oh wait, black walls are nothing............ Alton Towers Dungeon - 3/10

I hope everyone gets what they wish for... ...In reality, another year waves hello to yet another shake up in Thorpe’s management, staffing, project management and direction, meaning, yet again, consistency goes out of the window. Fright Nights is sadly an unorganised and chaotic event with little to no thought, direction or drive, and change in personnel can mark very significant differences in delivery. Big Top not returning due to lack of tent? More like lack of intent, with the creative minds and team behind its success walking away heads held high after completely turning around what was a disasterous delivery in 2015...

Guys, the tent is up. Quite a compact size this year but Big Top now confirmed. ?

Something Stupid: Thorpe Half Marathon 2018 How far would you go, as an enthusiast, to build your collection of Theme Park tat? ... Take out a Wonga loan to cover the cost? Break up with your long term partner so you can free up some space? How about run a half marathon to earn it...? Well, last Sunday saw me do Something Stupid as I found myself running the 21 kilometres of the 2018 Thorpe Half Marathon, all in an attempt to nab the jazzy coaster-themed medal bestowed upon those who manage to get over the finish line. And here for you, dear reader, is how I got on... Thorpe Half Marathon 2018 The Thorpe Half is now in its second year, having enjoyed a successful - if wet - debut in 2017. Unfortunately as it's held in February, the park is closed, so the only real connection to Thorpe Park is that it starts and ends in the car park; there's no sprinting past Stealth and dashing around Depth Charge. What it does have to offer however is a pleasant run through the Surrey countryside, along a relatively flat-profile road-closed course - perfect for those chasing a personal best. I was, it must be said, not chasing a personal best. I was just in it for the medal. So, first things first. Sunday 25th February 2018 was cold. Bloody cold. The event organisers recommended that participants arrived at the car park by 07:45am, to allow good time before the race started at 09:00am. At 07:45am on Sunday 25th February in the Thorpe Park car park, the mercury was touching -1 degrees C. But this hadn't deterred anyone! Indeed, the car park was busier than the average in-season Saturday when I arrived, and the place was buzzing with excited, committed runners. Many of whom seemed happy to be out in nothing more than vests, lycra, and shorts. In -1 degrees. At this point I must admit that I took a large gulp and wondered what on earth I was doing here - and this wouldn't be the last time this particular thought crossed my mind. It's also worth saying that I wasn't prepared for doing this. At all. The fault is squarely mine, but I had done such minimal training beforehand that it doesn't even really merit the name "training". Since I booked a place at the event back in November, I had managed a grand total of two 3 mile runs on the roads around my house. Two. And on one of those I very nearly threw up at the end of it. I am not a runner. I don't especially enjoy it, so, at best this was going to be a struggle. But there was only one way to get that medal...! At this point I decided I'd take my mind off the impending challenge by having a nose around the site. First up was a mosey on over to the park entrance - which looked very bare without an actual sign there! Does this happen every season, or might we be about to get a new sign design? And whilst they're at it, the paintwork could do with a good looking over too... Alas I was allowed to go no further, because this sign had both red writing and underlining - doubly authoritative. Thanks to my trusty zoom lens though, I could peek in a little closer... ...but there wasn't really much to see. The Annual Pass building seemed to be getting a good dose of TLC though. Looked like it was having a new roof fitted, given the scaffolding. Given the red underlined signs everywhere, it was pretty clear that the toilets by the entrance were out of bounds and out of action. So bring on the portaloos! Unfortunately, you can never have enough portaloos, and in this case, there weren't enough portaloos. Queueing is par for the course at any Theme Park, but queueing in sub zero temperatures is even less fun. A quick look over the back of the bogs revealed very little of interest - although Zodiac standing stationary in a half-upright position looked quite strange! There was no visible work being done to X / WDTR. However, it is photos such as this one that make me think how lucky we are to have a park as pretty as Thorpe in our country. Thorpe Park is rarely praised for looking good. But with bright blue skies and deep blue lakes top-and-tailing it, it can't be denied that this is a sweet view. Reminded me strangely of a (very) mini Cedar Point... OK - back to the action. The event organisers had done a great job with the central runners' village area, which contained a Cookie Bar, Coffee Stall, Massage Beds, Medal Engraving, a bunch of running-related retailers... ...and a stage! Pictured here are the Epsom Rock Choir, who were singing with gusto despite the bitter cold. Did I mention that it was cold? 08:45am. Nearly game time. I got changed into my kit, which naturally featured a vintage Thorpe t shirt, and made my way over to the start area. There were nearly 2,000 runners taking part in today's race, including many that had been bussed in by their local running group for the event. The "why am I here?" thought flickered across my mind once more. And we were off! The route took us past the annual pass building, down towards the car park entrance, and off to the left. Geek Photo #1 - the Protecting The Magic sign. Do you know the Six Spells for Safety? The route continued to track along the Staines Road, through the backstage areas of the park. Lots of industrial-looking buildings and infrastructure. And then, behold! Geek Photo #2 - I spy nostalgia! These look to me as if they've been saved from Chief Ranger's Carousel (RIP), which is great. But what will the park do with them?! Hopefully not leave them to rot... OK, back to the race. The course had kicked us out of the Thorpe Park grounds at around 1 mile, on to Norlands Lane, then Coldharbour Lane, past Thorpe Farm (RIP), and up to the Thorpe Bypass. At this point, my lack of fitness was really kicking in. The Sunday morning jolly at the Theme Park had suddenly turned very real, and I was wheezing after just 2 miles. What didn't help was this section of the course, which involved running half a mile up one half of the road, only to turn around and run straight back down the other half. Sigh. On the plus side, some great views of the M25. Oof. But to be fair, much of the route was through very pleasant countryside, and if I'd been more fit it might have even been enjoyable. As it was, it was a real mental effort to keep my head down, and keep moving. Just keep going. One step in front of the other. The coldness issue dropped away after 4 miles, because my body was generating so much heat. I was overtaken plenty of times, and I had to just walk up anything resembling an incline. Spotify was a massive help. The breakthrough for me came at about mile 10, where I realised that I'd made it around 75% of the course and that finishing was achievable! At mile 12, I could start to see the tops of some of the rides peek over the skyline - wow. Never have I been more motivated by seeing the crest of Tidal Wave's lift hill! My legs were properly turning to jelly, and the last pushes were really stop / start. But with a view like this, and the end in sight, I forced myself to go for a sprint finish for the last few hundred yards. I threw myself over the finish line and doubled over, my chest burning and my legs on fire. I'd done it! 2 hours, 1 minute, and 17 seconds of running later, and I'd completed the Thorpe Half. And what was all this endeavour for? Another addition to my collection of Theme Park tat! But what an addition it is. Genuine blood, sweat and tears went into getting it, so I suspect it will remain amongst the more treasured of all the tat in my possession. It's a good looking, weighty medal and I'm proud to have earned it! So, will I be running the Thorpe Half again next year to add another medal to my collection? Absolutely not! Immediately after the race my legs seized up to such an extent that I almost couldn't drive home. In the days following the event, my muscles were so sore that walking - anywhere - was a very real problem. And I later found I'd sprained my left foot along the course, and one of the toenails on my right foot had filled with blood and fallen off. Yuck. And did I mention the nipple chafing? These injuries are, of course, preventable. As I said at the top of the piece, my running the Thorpe Half was Stupid. I certainly don't recommend following my lead and just running a Half Marathon in freezing temperatures with no prior training whatsoever in order to obtain a coaster-themed medal. However, for those in better shape (or with a greater commitment to training) than I... it was a very well organised event. Why not give next year's a go? ~ Thanks for reading! Comments very welcome below.

Will fit right in...

People of TPM, the time has come! The votes have been counted and verified, after some delay. And so the time has come to reveal the winners... PARK AWARDS Best UK Park 1) Alton Towers (22) 2) Thorpe Park (14) 3) Paulton's Park (5) Best UK Coaster 1) Nemesis (8) 2) The Smiler (7) 3) The Swarm (6) Best UK Flat 1) Slammer (16) 2) Rush (12) 3) Samurai (8) Best UK Water 1) Valhalla (20) 2) Tidal Wave (13) 3) Congo River Rapids (4) Best UK Dark 1) Derren Brown's Ghost Train (13) 2) Valhalla (8) 3) Duel (7) Best Themed UK Experience 1) Derren Brown's Ghost Train (14) 2) London Dungeons (4) 3=) Valhalla (3) 3=) Lost Kingdom (3) Worst UK Ride 1) Storm Surge (16) 2) Derren Brown's Ghost Train (11) 3) Colossus (3) Best International Park 1) Europa Park (16) 2) Phantasialand (8) 3) Islands of Adventure (5) Best International Coaster 1) Helix, Liseberg (8) 2) Shambhala, Port Aventura (6) 3) Taron, Phantasialand (5) Best New-For-2016 Attraction 1) Taron / Klugheim (16) 2) DBGT (6) 3) Lost Kingdom (5) Best International Themed Experience 1) Tower of Terror (7) 2) Klugheim (3) 3) Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey (2) Most Uncomfortable Ride 1) Colossus (8) 2) Furius Baco (6) 3) Saw - The Ride (3) Most Disappointing Merlin Moment 2016 1) Derren Brown's Ghost Train - various reasons, from late opening, 12p ticket issues, general ride experience / availability... (26) 2) Loggers Leap closure (5) 3) Multiple ride closures (4) Best-Looking New-for-2017 Attraction 1) Symbolica (7) 2=) Ferrari Land, PA (4) 2=) Gruffalo attraction at Chessington (4) 2=) Volcano Bay (4) 2=) Mystic Timbers (4) 2=) "There's actually new stuff for 2017?" (4) Best Manufacturer 1) B&M (22) 2) Mack (21) 3) Intamin (6) MEMBER AWARDS Best Member 1) @BaronC. 2) @Matt Creek 3=) @Phill Pritchard 3=) @Wumbamillio Best Team Member 1) @Marc 2) @Peaj 3=) @Mark9 3=) @pluk Best New Member 1) @Josh3103 2) @Stuntman707 3) @Roodie Best Quality Posts 1) @BaronC. 2) @Wumbamillio 3) @Ian-S Best TPM Meet 1) Blackpool 2) Europa Park 3) Fright Nights Most Knowledgeable Member 1) @Wumbamillio 2=) @Marc 2=) @BaronC. 3) @Benin Most Dedicated 1) @Marc 2=) @Matt Creek 2=) @BaronC. 3) @Benin Most Sarcastic (aka 'Benin's Sarcasm Award') 1) @Benin 2) @Matt Creek 3) @wegloo Most Likely to be Banned in 2017 1) @Cornflakes 2) @Coaster Jamie 3) @ChessingtonSam Funniest Member 1) @pluk 2) @wegloo 3) @Matt Creek Biggest Fanboy/girl 1) @BaronC. 2) @Matt Creek 3=) @ChessingtonSam 3=) @Coaster Jamie Sexiest Male 1) @Matt Creek 2) @alexander 3) @Peaj Sexiest Female 1) @Amarghh 2=) @terrortomb 2=) @Matt Creek 3) @Mer Storm Surge Award 1) @Coaster Jamie 2) @ChessingtonSam 3) @Matt Creek Cutest Couple 1) @Ryan and @Amarghh 2) @Mitchada04 and @J.S217 3) @Marc and @Mr. Fish Member You'd Like to See More Of 1) @Jart 2) @Han30 3=) @Coaster Jamie 3=) @Phill Pritchard 3=) @David B

Having only managed to try it just once today thanks to some monstrous queues in the whole park, I have some mixed opinions on the whole attraction, but overall really enjoyed it. There are some parts which I really enjoyed and liked which worked very effectively, but at the same time, it felt like parts of the attraction were left unfinished and empty. First impressions of the outdoor queue were average with a new coloured buildings and new music (which did turn out to be the music posted the other day from the 2009 animated film) and thankfully no more of that ghastly exterior music used before. Whilst there were no issues with this or with the moved entrance, once again like every single new attractions that is built now, there MUST be a green screen photo opportunity to upsell you on which has now been placed just before you go inside. Hardly surprised, but didn't appreciate this after waiting in line for 70 minutes and with Fastrack in full operation congesting the main queue. Ignoring that, the station area was quite nice and simple with what looks to be 2D drawings of the characters against the walls. Now I understand some have criticised this and have said it's cheaply done, to which I wholeheartedly agree with. But I got the impression that the build-up to the ride was supposed to be referring to the book instead of the animated film and once inside, it all comes to life with 3D characters. So I'm not that fussed about the station - It's simple, has better roofing and feels fresh again, plus it is a lot darker than when it was Bubbleworks which is a big noticeable difference for the whole attraction. Now onto the ride, this is where things begin to get mixed. Unlike Bubbleworks where everything was on a loop with no synchronised scenes to reflect the positioning of your boat, almost the entire ride up until the drop was timed so that when you enter each room, a voice read out passages from the book where some of them were shined onto the wall such as "A little brown mouse walked through the woods" as soon as you enter the first darkened room. This helped make the experience feel more complete and enjoyable and the mix of storytelling with the scenes was very well done. One of the biggest and most noticeable differences with it is how much darker and dimly lit all of the scenes are this time. Bubbleworks during its final years was almost entirely lit up which made everything easily visible. But this time, only the scenery and characters are lit with filtered lighting which draws your attention to them and not the surrounding enclosed walls. The lighting was very effective and is far better than what we had before. However, there were some scenes where there were blank walls with absolutely no theming or details whatsoever and this really aggravated me. At least with Bubbleworks you got a printed pattern or painting to look at, but this time, they are plain, white and ordinary. For instance when leaving the station down the ramp, that small room where the professor previously sat at his desk is now completely blank with white walls everywhere and no theming was added to the flooring either. All that happened was a projector shined on the wall with an animation of the mouse walking, with the words from the author read out. Not the best first impression of the ride, but after that, it gets a lot better. One thing that did surprise me greatly was the sheer size of the characters through various scenes. The 2nd room where Mouse encounters Fox for instance was simply enormous and was very close to you when you passed by! Same for Owl and definitely the Gruffalo. There were some thematic elements which involved the use of projectors and TV screens of the characters through these small windows, primarily from the animated film. Whilst I didn't necessarily have an issue with this, my worry is will they be maintained on a frequent basis to stop them from breaking or going wrong? If the park can do this then that's great, but if it ends up like Smiler's queue line where the projectors over time became dimmer, unaligned and frankly broken, the effect will become useless. The fact some scenes are almost entirely dependant on this has me concerned slightly. Something else that I couldn't help but notice is with the entire attraction being much darker inside than previously, it became quite hard to distinguish the walls and the whole thing felt smaller inside. So much so that I'd go as far to say slightly claustrophobic due to the close proximity of the characters with the boats. It didn't bother me at all, but thought it's something interesting to note. As for the drop and finale, this is now where your on-ride photo is now taken. Just before you reach the bottom, the Gruffalo appears above you with moving orange eyes and a flash, blinding you, takes your photo. Inside the finale, there are still SOME of the overhead fountains present, but only the ones where you are either entering or leaving the room, not in the centre where there is now a massive tree overshadowing you as you pass under with Owl looking down at you. The centre piece where the bathtub used to be confused me. From what I gathered, it looked like Fox's tail trying to run scared because of the Gruffalo, but maybe I'm wrong. In full, the finale still has plenty of lighting effects used in different colours with some of the fountains working and it is a much better room than what was there before. The best way I can explain is try not to think of this room as a finale anymore; just as the penultimate scene to the ride instead following what the book says. Lastly, the corner where after you just leave the fountain room is where the story finishes and Mouse is sitting on a log with his acorn, and you pass through a mist of air with a projection on it of what I believe is an animation of 'Gruffalo Crumble', as well as a vertical screen of the Gruffalo running away from the mouse, just like in the book and film before coming back into the station again. Nothing too dramatic, but a nice way to end the ride. So whilst there were some really good elements such as the lighting, atmosphere, story telling and effects, the big issue I have is with the longevity and lack of substance in some areas I've seen. The fact they have ripped out some areas and simply replaced it with white walls which are used only to project sentences from the book, along with some drawings really annoys me greatly because they could have used a lot of that space to add theming elements such as trees and bushes to fit in with the theme a bit better. You know, like the promo art suggests? That coupled with characters that hardly move at all in this attraction and are static, non-animatronics irritated me slightly too. But besides from that, this overall I would say is a far needed and I believe welcomed addition to the park. It's not perfect in anyway and there are some potential flaws with the design I can see with broken effects and lacklustre scenes, but all in all, I enjoyed this far more than what Bubbleworks was in it's final last years from 2010 onwards and I conclude this is a worthwhile investment made. Despite it appealing to the younger audience, it clearly still has a place for families and older members. All I can advise is get on it as soon as you can whilst everything is currently working to experience it properly! Bubbleworks (1990-2005): 8/10 Imperial Leather Bubbleworks (2006-2016): 4/10 Gruffalo River Ride Adventure : 7/10 (On-ride photo for those interested. I apologise. I can never seem to get a normal on-ride photo with my family for some reason... )

Darude Sandstorm

I agree the ending is what needed significant attention, and if they are in fact building something completely new and swallowing their pride then thats a big step forward. Reinvent the whole ending to the attraction, brilliant. However, I do find it easy to see how people are finding negatives, because of this team's pathetic track record of making decisions on pretty much every attraction theyve made ever. I fear the process was: Guests comment "wot that wasn't scary/ is that it?" Market 'research' (exit surveys) concludes 'guests don't find it scary enough'. MMM 'We need to make it scarier, let's add a shipping container scare maze ending' or something quick and basic. The scariness isn't the ride's problem. If it was entertaining enough and really hit the mark, then people would come out having experienced something really great and wouldn't be feeling disappointed. Many people probably went in thinking it was going to be "the scariest thing ever" not knowing what Derren Brown's brand of entertainment actually is or understanding the ghost train idea. Why would you want to dumb down the concept to appeal to this misunderstanding, when you could potentially surprise them in much more ingenious ways? Scaring people is easy to do. Its as easy as having some flashy lights in darkness, loud noises and an actor jumping out at you. Please please don't do a Sub Terra with that awful cop out ending tacked on. Please don't do actors that will inevitably get cut within 3 years. Please don't always make the most obvious, superficial response to market research.

An interesting question with a few answers. First off, to answer you concern: it was nothing to do with it being "too extreme". There wasn't enough serious complaints from guests who did it to warrant its removal. Frankly, I don't even know if there were any complaints - everyone knew what they were getting themselves in for. These sorts of experiences have a niche market (albeit, Thorpe and Towers' alone experiences expanded and simultaneously watered-down the niche). A short answer: There wasn't a strong enough drive internally to get it to come back. Devising the experience takes time (it wasn't simply "actors do whatever they want"), and there was no one who was in a position (in terms of the time-commitment required) to create it. There had been some backlash from actors about the experience who didn't feel comfortable doing it (something I'll go into later), plus it could add another hour onto an already very long day, where they have to work 10x harder. Those two together meant it just wouldn't get off the ground. A long answer: Less of an answer, and more of a story.. Face it Alone came about in 2013, with the park trying to diversify their line up and really focus on becoming a bigger, better and more unique Halloween event. The Lionsgate IP bought in the brands and the interest, completely refreshing the concept of Fright Nights. They tried new maze concepts: choices (Cabin in the Woods) and outdoors (Blair Witch Project). They introduced a (sadly poorly received) overnight experience, which was trendy at the time, and pushed forward with the Face it Alone: an extreme and an alone experience in one; again something which was trending and on the up in the scare industry at the time. For anyone that did it in 2013, you'll no doubt know that every experience was different. The actors were given a scope of things they could do, boundaries they could push and ideas they could toy with. It was free-reign, but it gave the actors a much freer realm to work in. Another important thing to note is that Face it Alone wasn't particularly popular in 2013. People were unsure what exactly it was, whether it was worth the £15, etc. You could also choose which maze to experience. Which all in all meant it was easier to organise, give a personal touch, etc. When 2014 came along, the experience changed somewhat. Whilst it was still 'extreme', the actors stuck to much stricter roles. Basically, actor 1 did x to you, actor 2 did y to you, etc. By no means a bad thing (if planned correctly, this can be a very good thing), just different. Again, this year you could choose your own maze and, whilst it had gained popularity, it was still pretty calm. 2015 is when everything changed, and was arguably the beginning of the end. Face it Alone became a much bigger spectacle. Gone were the days of choosing your own maze, and it was instead replaced with the Roulette Ceremony by Big Top. A great idea in fairness, and one that many enjoyed. This meant it garnered more attention and became much more popular, and went outside of the niche. Already teetering on the edge here. 2015 did go back to 2013's free realm style too. There were clearly things that certain actors had to do at certain points to progress you through the experience, but in between actors had a very large scope of what they could do. The next thing with 2015 was the overt sexualisation of the experiences. It's probably not suitable to discuss the details on a public forum, but many things done within the experiences weren't scare tactics, they were simply there sexualised things made to make people feel uncomfortable, humiliated and uncertain. This was the first year that a safe word was introduced too. Safe words do appear in many extreme attractions, but I don't think it's a coincidence that a safe word appeared at the same time the sexualised content of Face it Alone occurred. This was a completely different direction to what had happened before. Whilst Face it Alone may have featured things like nudity/being tied up/etc - ie things that COULD be sexualised - they never WERE. By doing so, it adds a very different tone. And this tone meant that people were enjoying these experiences in a very different way. There were plenty of times that people within Face it Alone experiences were asking for certain things to be done to them so that they could 'get their money's worth' and be satisfied with the experience. These sorts of things had happened in previous years, but not to the degree they had happened in 2015. This, unsurprisingly, led to some actors being rather uncomfortable with the experience. Come 2016, things had been toned down again. It went back more to 2014's "carbon copy" style experience. Originally it led to some complaints that it wasn't as extreme. I think one issue was that the 2015 version of Face it Alone had created a following of people who hadn't experienced extreme attractions outside of Face it Alone, so they had a very set idea of what should happen. When this didn't happen, it lead to that sort of backlash. Getting the balancing act right likely proved hard. And yet there were still people asking for certain things to be done to them, etc. Then 2017 came along, there had been a feeling of discomfort for a while from some actors. The experience had expanded too far out and wasn't something that could be controlled and marketed as it should. People changed roles. The amount of work required to hit that sweet spot was ever-growing, for perhaps diminishing returns. Fright Nights also focused on The Walking Dead, and AMC are known for very strict guidelines about their attractions. Working out a Face it Alone experience for those mazes would have been near-on impossible. So everything together just meant it didn't happen, and it hasn't returned since. And that's that. New external IP, internal concerns and arguably a bit of apathy/running out of steam all really finished it off. Maybe in the future it can return. With the AMC contract disappearing soon that would help. Seeing the extreme version of Creepy Caves at Chessington being a success probably helps. But it requires a lot of work, a lot more than many perhaps realise and appreciate. And I'm not sure I could see it happening soon.

Can't wait for sex education the experience xx

Would have thought you of all people would have realised a sarcastic post when it's slapped across your face. Clearly not.

There has to be some pretty good reason if Big Top isn’t to return this year. *snaps fingers*

Hi All, I'm a bit of an amateur photographer and took my camera with me on Tuesday (10/07/2018). Quite happy with some of the shots. Please note that I have personally taken the images and if you do wish to use them elsewhere then please ask my permission first, but just really wanted to share these! Hope you like them.

I feel sorry for anyone who has to go to media night, since they'll have to be near some arrogant enthusiasts who think they're special since they get to go to a theme park a day earlier...

If it was the longest name we'd surely know of it. Gotta get a gimmick in there somehow

I hate this guy

OMG I hardly recognise it ?

StevenVig being unnecessarily sarcastic about a justified comment? Shock horror

I'm only going on the 24th to ride Loggers, Slammer, X & Rocky Express tbh so will be heading straight to guest services if any of these rides are not available.

Converts one of their few family rides (and a great ride in it's own right) into an age gated scare-a-thon. What a mess...

I asked Thorpe on social media if they plan to open Nemesis Inferno at midday for synergy across the brand

Can I take this opportunity to thank all those staff members who made my visits so good this year. The ride operators, the engineers and the cleaning staff, who all dealt with me and those within earshot so tactfully and patiently. Staff and even some managers whom I saw rush to assist to tidy up the mess that some unwell riders left. Whatever you all do in the future, this should have been a good experience to meet and deal with such a wide range of people from all walks of life. The staff should feel chuffed if their "customers" left with a smile, you've done your bit to make somebody's day, well done.

Hola! I’m excited to finally announce the details for our 2017 European trip to PortAventura! The dates for this meet will be Saturday 9th September - Tuesday 12th September. There is not a vote for this meet due to other commitments and trying to make the trip as cheap as possible for all. This is a longer meet than usual due to there being two parks and a waterpark which we will be visiting. PortAventura is a fantastic park and I would recommend a few days to get everything done (plus ride Baco until you break your backo). As this is a trip abroad it is strictly an over 18’s meet I’m afraid. I understand some of you may be disappointed about this, but due to the meet being outside the country it complicates matters too much! This meet is taking a lot of advanced planning and is obviously more expensive than a standard meet, which is why we are giving you plenty of notice to save up/book time off work etc. I have used Expedia to price up this trip and the cheapest I’ve found it (based on a room of 4) is £223 each which includes hotel, flights, park tickets (plus 1 day Ferrari Land entry) and breakfast each day. Obviously the earlier this is booked, the cheaper it will be. I have just booked a room of 4 for 4 members who have shown previous interest. I can help out with recommendations for booking, but it will be down to yourselves to book flights and accommodation how you wish. You can make your own travel arrangements, but these are our planned flights: We will be staying at the onsite Hotel El Paso which is a 4* hotel with onsite swimming pool, 2 restaurants and live entertainment. It is also a short walk to the park. Based on previous experience going to PortAventura, there is absolutely no chance I would recommend visiting this park without using their unlimited fastpass. As onsite hotel guests we get this at a discounted rate and it is valid for our entire stay (I believe it is around 50Euro’s each). This is something we will all be getting so please bare that in mind when calculating costs. Our previous European park visits have been absolutely fantastic and there is no reason why this would be any different. If you have any questions then please do feel free to message me and I will help as much as I can. Let me know below if you are interested in attending! Booked: Doc Kerfuffle Marc Martin.C Martin Doyle Matt Creek Mattgwise Mr Fish Ryan Terrortomb

Some of this post is dreadful... I don't think there is any park in the entire world which had the budget Animal Kingdom had when built (it quite possibly still is the most expensive park ever built)... Given that Chessie was the first real attempt at a theme park in the UK, and has spent particularly the last decade being butchered to bits, it's astounding how much of the place still stands across many of the areas... Original Bubbles being a half baked idea is honestly the worst thing I've ever read on this forum... I suggest watching the Dark Ride Archive video on it, because I'm just astounded by the ignorance of it... Half baked? Bubbles is perhaps THE ride that captured the minds and hearts of every single UK enthusiast... The park is almost definitely trading on nostalgia, but surely that shows that when people were growing up, it struck an immense chord to the visiting public? Unfortunately it never truly left the 90s...

Will EU laws matter by the time Thorpe decide what to do with it?

Enthusiasts acting self-entitled and thinking they're better than other people 'because they're enthusiasts'.

It's the Gruffalo isn't it.

Whatever the condition of the ride, I think this situation is emblematic of the way Merlin's UK parks are being run at the moment. They don't have the commitment to say "We have set the ride aside for redevelopment for X amount of time, so that it may open at the precise date of Y", nor "We won't be reopening the ride, since we have deemed it unfeasible for redevelopment". Whether or not "behind-the scenes" work has been done on it, the fact is that we're almost a year later and we still have no idea whether it will reopen, let alone any indication of a reopening date. The fact is that this project has basically been stagnant for a year, much like the "redevelopments" across the other parks. Frankly I'm tired of these parks being run in such a haphazard way, and once the next screw-up like this happens at Alton Towers (which, to my displeasure, is very likely), they won't be getting any more of my money until they turn their attitude around and bring some damn professionalism to the table. In the meantime, I have plenty of other great and enthusiastically-run UK parks to enjoy and discover.

I'm guessing the space will be left open till their next major investment year, which considering DBGT probably cost a bomb being closed for so long, having so many technical issues, and being a bit of a disaster all around, may be a while. I wouldn't expect to see anything there for at least 4 or so years. I hope I am wrong. Just saying though, I really hope they move that Colossus spinning jump thing over to Old Town and rename it Loggers Leap, imagine the salt that would inspire from the enthusiast community! It would be hilarious!

Have removed a couple of posts from here - Regardless on your opinions on Nick’s music - fair play to him for organising this - just looked and I saw he’s raised almost £600 to donate to a mental health charity and no one deserves to be berated for that - that’s significant amount especially during these times from such a niche market. Whilst I get it may not be everyone’s cup of tea I think it’s great people when people l come together and do things like this which will ultimately benefit others more in need, especially in times like this!

Congratulations on the success of your campaign.

Oh god it was ****